Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Things are never what they seem ❯ Vegeta?!?! A House wife?!?!?! ( Chapter 3 )

Lily: Here ya go! Chapter 3! I figured that you guys would want to know what happened, so I was very kind in typing this up. Though I am tempted to make you wait for another week.

Vegeta: About time onna.

Lily: Call me onna one more time and you will be lucky if you get laid anytime this month! I am sick of it, and I may borrow Cathowl's Saiyan Swatter that Washu made for him! Please Cathowl, let me borrow it??? By the by, Cathowl is the reason this chapter is out. I am his beta reader, and he may become mine! I am looking for a beta reader, all those who want to apply, please say so in your reviews, I love reading the reviews! Elanya, I am sorry about that, FF.net was being evil to me. And Kewla, the best way for Vegeta to be happy is to make me happy by not calling me onna! I am not Bulma! And steph, enjoy this chapter! I dedicate this to my reviewers so far, and hope for more to come! Disclaimer is in first chapter, I refuse to repeat it.

Vegeta: Onna, get on with the story!

Lily: Cathowl, really, please let me borrow it, Vegeta is getting on my damn nerves, and Goku won't hurt him! *Does the Duo eyes* Pwease?!?!?!

Chapter 3

Vegeta looked straight into Kakkarott's eyes, wondering what he was up to. Goku was perched on Vegeta's chest, barely any weight placed on him. Goku just smirked, and grabbed Vegeta's wrists in one hand, holding them over the Saiyan no ouji's head. Vegeta was surrounded by this scent, and it started to mess with his mind. Kakkarott licked his lips, and leaned slowly down toward Vegeta. (Now I get evil.) Suddenly, just as their lips touched, there was a shout. "Hey Dad!" "Hey Goku!" Vegeta swore he heard Kakkarott growl before he got off and grinned that stupid grin of his. "Hey Goten, hey Trunks. Why are you two here?" "Well, mom is still unconscious on the couch, and we got hungry. That and we wanna spar!" "Couldn't you go over to Capsule Corp. to get Bulma to feed you?" This time Trunks spoke up. "Come on Goku, you know my mom can't cook!" Vegeta snorted. "The brat is right about that." Trunks saw his dad and grinned. "Hey Dad! Can you cook us some lunch? Please?" Vegeta grumbled. `Oh, I guess brat. What time is it?" "11:30." "WHAT?!?!?! KAKKAROTT, DID YOU KNOW IT HAD BEEN THIS LONG SINCE WE STARTED SPARRING?!?!?!" "Um.. yes Vegeta, I did." Vegeta was incredulous. "And your stomach didn't rebel at being empty?!?!?!" Goku blushed faintly. "Well, I was.. distracted." Vegeta stared at Goku. Well, he had found a way to distract the baka from his stomach, but was it worth it? His mind and pride said no, but something else said yes, besides his body. He ignored it, having no clue as to what he was feeling, was unfamiliar, therefore useless in his mind. He grumbled again, but flew up and shot off towards the Son house, resigned to cooking until the baka onna woke up. And she would only be able to cook if she did not hit him over the head with that stupid pan of hers.

He growled as he landed, and stormed into the house. `Good, that harpy is still out, so I do not have to deal with her. What in the world possessed that baka Kakkarott to marry her?!?! I would not bequeath her on my worst enemy, much less Kakkarott. He may be stupid, and I see why now, but he does not deserve that kind of treatment. I am surprised he is not even stupider, what with those stupid pans of hers.' He set about in the kitchen, getting everything started to feed two full grown Saiyans, one teenage Saiyan, and two chibi Saiyans. That meant a lot of food left ChiChi's stores that day, more than she was used to dealing with. By the time the boys and Goku had landed, most of the food was done, and Vegeta was even trying to help Gohan with his homework, which surprised Goku, Goten, and Trunks. This was spooky. Vegeta was cooking, being semi-nice, and helping Gohan with homework, what the hell was happening?!?! Goku walked up to Vegeta and placed his hand on Vegeta's forehead, checking for a fever. Vegeta looked cross-eyed at Goku's hand, and then wrenched it off of his forehead. "Kakkarott, what the hell are you doing?!?!" "Checking for a fever, this is abnormal for you." "I am not sick you baka! Now leave me the fuck alone!" Unfortunately, ChiChi chose this moment to wake up, and she heard what he said, and, most importantly, she heard him cuss. She ran into that kitchen so fast she was a blur, even for Saiyan eyesight, and pulled out her thickest pan, slamming it over Vegeta's head. "ONNA! YOU BITCH, THAT HURT!" She hit him again for calling her a bitch, and yelled right back, "DO NOT CUSS IN FRONT OF MY CHILDREN!"

Gohan could see a war brewing, so he did the only thing he could. He hit her softly in the head, and ChiChi went back to the world of the unconscious. Gohan caught her as she fell, and carried her back into the living room, placing her on the couch. He walked back in, saw his dad and Vegeta staring, and shrugged. "She would have cause a small war with Vegeta, and I do not need that right now, so that was the easiest route I saw. It worked, didn't it?"

Lily: AAANNNDDD CUT! Oh my god, I can't believe that I had Gohan knock ChiChi out!!! She deserved it anyways, she is such an annoying bitch, almost as bad as Relena, the pink bitch. I dislike them both.

Vegeta: *sobbing quietly* she did it again, she did it again.

Lily: I took his lemon away again, he called me onna, so he got punished. If only my muses learned from their mistakes.