Fan Fiction ❯ Merry Marriage Murderers ❯ weddings: 0 | funerals: 1 ( Chapter 4 )
[Hyrule Castle]
King of Hyrule: . . . . and King Zora?
Zelda: He's still obsessed with his first wife . . . . stupid Zoras . . . .
KoH: And Ganondorf really turned you down?? I mean . . . . he could have been the next legal King of Hyrule!!
Zelda: I AM GOING TO DIE!!!!!! DADDY!!!!
KoH: Calm down, my dear. Let me think again . . . . royal people in Hyrule . . . . Ganondorf . . . . King Zora . . . . uhm . . . . . WAIT!!
Zelda: What??
KoH: There's still one royal person left!!!
Zelda: Who????
Koh: MIDO!!! He is . . . .
Zelda+KoH: A ROYAL PAIN IN THE ASS!!!!!
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[Deku Tree Meadow]
Saria: AH!!! MIDO!!!! HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN???
Mido: I . . . . I don't know . . . . I just sat there . . . . and . . . . we were playing cards . . . .and then . . . . . he died . . . . and the freaky voice came and said . . . . you know . . . . the thing about the spouse . . . . .
Great Deku Tree: X__X [is dead]
Saria: But we were married!!! You were the one who married us!! THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE!!!
Ruto: [appears] Hello?
Saria+Mido: HOLY MACCARONI! IT'S THE FISH FREAK!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
Ruto: CALM DOWN!!!
Saria: Sorry . . . . bad habbit . . . .
Ruto: Where's Link???
Saria: Uh . . . I guess he wants to escape his certain demise.
Ruto: Eh?
Saria: Mido, please marry me!! I don't want to die!!!!
Mido: I . . . I don't know . . . you . . . married the Great Deku Tree . . . . you might as well be cursed!!
Ruto: ARE YOU STONED OR WHAT'S UP HERE????
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[in the land of love (aaaawww!!)]
Navi: My plan is perfect!! All I have to do is steal the arrows of a cupid and then they will be mine!! MINE!!! MINE!!! I'M NOT GOING TO DIE!!!!! MWAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
. . . . . .
Navi: Oh . . .ssssh . . . . they're coming! [hides behind a tree]
[two cupids fly by]
Cupid1: I was sooo glad to see the puppy and the kitty being happy together!
Cupid2: I love to spread love all over the world!! It's the best thing one could ever do!!
[Navi appears with a frying pan]
Navi: SHAZZAAAAAAAAAAAM!!!!!! [hits the two cupids]
Cupid1: I see little cupids everywhere . . . . [passes out]
Cupid2: Doing . . . dededeee . . . doing . . . . [passes out]
Navi: VICTORY!!! MWWWEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEH EHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE!!!!!
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[Temple of Time]
Malon: I understand . . . .
Rauru: The way you did it was okay but not legal. You need a priest. Only then the voice will accept your marriage and have mercy with you.
Malon: Where can I find a priest??
Rauru: Luckily for you . . . I am a priest.
Malon: WOOOHOOO!!!!!
Rauru: Bring your husband and I will arrange a wedding for you.
Malon: Well . . . . . I don't have a husband . . . . . or . . . should I say . . . . I didn't?? (evil grin)
Rauru: O___O
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Shazaaaam!! Dadee . . . lala . . . . done! ^_^
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