Fan Fiction ❯ Stormy Conscience ❯ Dream of love ( Chapter 18 )

Chapter 18 (Lore POV) Dream of love.

He leaned closer to me; the perfumed smell of his hair was intoxicating my senses. His hands caress my face urging me to tell him what he wanted to hear, but I'm not sure I could bring myself to say anything. There are no words to describe his beauty; all the compliments in the world would not be enough to make him understand what I think of him. I felt so hopeless; I was never going to be good enough for him. I'm so plain, I'm not like him. I have no splendour like him; I was never an angel of heaven like him. His everything I'm not, my love for him is an unrequited love and it will never change. He will never love me. A tear drop ran down my face, I'm so useless all I do is cry. Why can't I be brave like everyone else, everything scares me.

"Your beauty is beyond anything I could imagine, it's perfection… that is what I admire the most. It's uniqueness that is what I lust over. Your beauty grips on to my heart and will never let go. But I know that someone with beauty like yours could never love anyone like me. I'm never going to be good enough for you, so I shouldn't even dream." Tears fell to the floor and I stepped away from Sam.

"The words you utter from your mouth are like poetry, you speak as if you understand the heart, but you're wrong." Sam grabbed my arm and pulled me to him and wrapped his arms around my waist. I closed my eyes and sobbed bitterly as he leaned forward, with his lips close to my ears for I feared cruel taunts about my feelings. "You are so very mistaken. I have always… loved you." I bit my lip and smiled I felt so content. I bury my face in his auburn locks, this was as close as heaven as I would ever get. Blissful harmony as our hearts beat in time, I have never been happier to be wrong. This was like a dream, not the cruel harsh reality of the city we live in. I want to live in this dream world forever, never again to return to the sins of the city. Just to be in the arms of Sam is enough for me. Cinsanati's cough brought me back to the fact that we were in a corridor that lead into the city of the damned.

"I hate to interrupt but I would really like to get a move on because I don't want to be standing here all day." He gave an impatient look. Sam sighed and reluctantly let go of me to unlock the door.

"Please don't walk off cos you are likely to get hurt if you do." He explained to Cinsanati as he walked out into the street. We followed him closely and the door slammed behind us. The place hadn't really changed a lot since I had last been here. The homeless lined the streets and the only sign of life was a man hanging around outside a building with neon lights flashing `XXX'. His eyes widen with terror when he caught sight of Sam and hurried into the club, a lot of people are afraid of Sam. Before I met him I heard a lot of rumours about him, people called him things like `The beauty of death' and `The Judger of angels" as he would decide if you live in the city of the damned or went to Hell. He killed loads of people, if their name wasn't on the list then they died it was a lot easier that way. A lot of names became misplaced I remember the state the filing system was in before I took over the job, I wasn't surprised that some people were killed by mistake or that names were lost. Though since I've been in charge of filing people in and stuff Sam hasn't needed to kill so many people, I think he appreciated that fact. When I first saw him…I don't know, I felt so attracted to him. I just stepped out of the shadows when he asked, normally when people asked me to show myself I just stalked off. But I wasn't scared of him even if he was `The Judger of angels', but I guess I had pretty much given up on life at that point so didn't care if he killed me. I look at Sam with admiration, he had changed a lot from the sword bearing angel I had first seen, he had been hunting down someone who had managed to get in the city without having their name checked. I was so shy, he kept asking questions about this guy, like if I had seen him and other stuff. I amazed myself when he was about to continue his search, I asked whether I could help him. I kinda just blurted it out and when he asked me with what, I pretty much said what ever he wanted. So he said I could tag along and that he had a post just open, so he could see how well I did with that, to see how long he would keep me there. I was pulled out of my thoughts by an item I saw in the pawnbrokers.

"Hey a camera, that's so cool. It's Polaroid and all." I waved Cinsanati and Sam over to show them my discovery.

"What's a `camer'? It doesn't look that exciting, just a grey box. Anyway I would really like…" Cinsanati started to grumble, but I interrupted him quickly.

"I'll be back in a minute." I rushed in the store leaving Cinsanati moaning about not being on a shopping trip and concentrating on doing important stuff. The shop itself was really dusty and obviously wasn't maintained to attract customers. The woman at the desk glared at me

"What do you want?" She snapped at me, I thought for a second and decided what to offer in exchange for the camera. I pulled out a flask of whiskey, it was engraved with dragons.

"I'll give you this for the Polaroid camera and its film in the window. It's full of whiskey and the flask is silver coated." I waited for the intimidating wild women who owned the store.

"Fine." She said abruptly and snatched the flask out of my hand. She briskly stalked to the front window display, she swigged down the content of the flask and replace the camera and film with it. She staggered over to me and shoved what I wanted into my hands roughly. I hurried out of the store to show Sam and Cinsanati my new purchase.

"Look, this is a camera Cinsanati." I place the film in to the camera delicately and aimed it at him "Smile!"

"You what?" He winced and held his hands up to his eyes as the camera flashed brightly. "Ahh my eyes what kind of magic is that thing?" He glared suspiciously at the camera as it whirled and spat out the picture. I shook the card vigorously until an imaged formed.

"It's not magic." I passed the photo to him. "See it takes a picture of you." He shrugged unimpressed, I gave the camera to him. "You can take a picture of me and Sam, take two so that I can have one and you can have one." He looked at the camera clueless. "Look through the hole thing, that's right." I instructed him as Sam wrapped his arms around me. "And press the red button on top." I smile as he successfully managed to take two pictures in succession. He place one of the pictures in a pocket inside his top he was wearing before giving me the second photo.

"There now we've done that can we go. I want to get this over with you know." He growled impatiently, Sam just shrugged and continued down the road.

"I don't know what you're worried about if you get in or not. Both are pretty much the same I guess. Some time I wish that we had kept control of the city but in the end you can't just think well maybe if I had done this. You just can't waste your life with `ifs' and `buts'. Though I still wish I could have done it differently." He sighed and turned the corner to reveal the Palace directly in front of us. I gasp I had never seen the Palace before I had heard of its splendour, but never imagined it to be anything like it was. The building itself would have been dull if it was made out of stone or bricks but it wasn't. It shone brightly like a ray of hope and sparkled in places. It was as if the stars had been scattered on the building instead of the sky.

"Ah admiring my beautiful home, I wish I could spend more time there." Sam smiled at the amazed look on my face.

"What the hell is that place made of?" Cinsanati looked as amazed as me at the sight before us.

"Silver, platinum, a bit of gold and diamonds scattered across the walls to add effect. The walls around it are unassailable, well they have to be. And even if someone got in I'd like to see them not shoot down by the guards patrolling the area. I pulled out my camera and took a picture; I probably wouldn't see it again. This could be my last venture in to the city, I'm surprised I'm here even now. "Well let's go in then." The gates of gold swung open.