Fan Fiction ❯ The Goddess Sagas ❯ I?m A Fool ( Chapter 49 )

Chapter 48; I'm A Fool

Ryan continued to fall deeper into the dark ocean. An empty feeling filling up his heart, though dispite the lack of emotions he still felt tears rolling down his cheeks, and drifting upwards into the black water, and went to bubble on top of it's surface. The tears though, Ryan did not recognize what they were...he found it hard to focus on anything anymore....maybe everything had been an dream...maybe none of it was real....maybe....maybe he was the real Ryan, and was dead and left floating in the life stream and everything up to this point had been a drama-series within his own mind. Or maybe, he was a clone...a fake and he died and went to hell for what he had done...for how he doomed the world.....

He did not know what was real anymore, maybe nothing had ever been real....maybe.....maybe....

The tears came more rabidly and he let out a sob. `Am I real...? Can a clone be real? Who I'm I!? I'm I Ryan, or am I a clone!? I'm I anybody.....I'm I even myself....I don't know....I just don't know...I want to know...who am I? What am I?

Flash

Ryan looked around himself confused, he was in a snowy desert an cold brisk wind blew past him making him shiver. He noticed that his hands were small, and that he stood at a short height, was he a child again?

"Ryan? Are you cold? Stay close to me, ok baby?" A tender and loving voice came from behind him, making him turn around startled, he saw his mother, Lou, standing there, dressed in her rags, holding the baby Parfait.

"Mom....? It's you, it's really you!" Ryan exclaimed, happily, running up to her and giving her an hug, crying in her rags.

"Ryan?" Lou blinked confused, before laughing. "What's gotten into you? Of course it's me, silly."

"Oh mom, I'm so glad your hear!"

"....? Ryan I will always be here for you, you know that, now come on, stop acting as though you've been lost, and let's continue on, sweet heart. We are soon to Angeles, we have friends there, your aunt Karen will feed us and take care of us, though, she will probably yell at me till I'm deft...but, oh well..."

Ryan walked beside his mother contentedly, smiling as he held her hand, in the distance he spotted Angeles and ran off a little ahead, eyes widening happily.

"Mom, we are soon there! I can see it!"

He turned around but his mother was looking behind her at something, eyes wide in fear. It was then Ryan remembered the dream.

"Mom, no!" He screamed, but it was to late...She rushed towards he, shielding his body with her own, an bullet piercing threw her frail form, her eye widening as she fell in a bloody heap on the snow.

"Mom...." Ryan closed his eyes, tears spilling down her cheeks. She weakly reached up and handed him Parfait whom cried loudly in fear.

"R...Ryan...Take care of your sister....Go to Angeles, find your aunt...tell her...tell her to ....eh..." she coughed, sputtering up blood. " Tell her not to let you get involved with....the goddesses...but...if by some misfortune of faith you do then....take this." seeing his tears she reached up weakly brushing them away from his face, managing an sad smile as she took her had away and reached with an shaking arm beneath her cloak, pulling out an sword, much to big for the boy to handle.

"It was your father's sword...it will...protect you...but don't let...don't let the darkness in the sword control you..."

`The darkness of this sword did control me.....' Ryan thought as she placed it in his hands.

"Mom....don't, die. Don't leave me alone here."

"I love you, both of you, remember that always....And I will always be near...always."

"HEY, GET AWAY FROM HEAR!!" An voice shouted.

Ryan looked up at figure, face and body blocked form recognized by the blowing snow. The figure rode an horse, and still had a gun aimed in his hands.

"I DON'T WANT TO KILL YOU, BUT I CAN'T HELP WHAT I DO!! PLEASE, LEAVE BEFORE I KILL YOU TO!!"

`No...I wont run this time...I will see....who.'

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING! GO!!!" The voice shouted again.

"I'M NOT!" Ryan shouted back. "You don't scare me! Come on, go a head and kill me!!"

The figure on the horse back galloped towards them and full speed, and stopped infront of them, staring down at the young boy and the little baby an puzzled look dotted his features.

Ryan gasped, putting a hand to his mouth. The figure had white hair wrapped in a bun in the back of the head, two strains going down by his ears, dark purple eyes, and was wearing a pair of gray pants and a bright red jacket.

"...L...Lemon!" Ryan backed away, startled.

"What? How did you know my name?" Lemon frowned, speaking in a cold and harsh voice...so un-Lemon like.

"You....you were the one whom killed my mother....why?......why?"

"..........."

"How could you!?"

"I don't have a choice. I can't control what I do, now go, or else, you will die to." Lemon's face turned pained and he pointed his gun to Ryan's forehead.

"How can I forgive you for what you've done....? How could you?......? How come you never told me Lemon. Why did you kill my mother.......why? Is this the great sin you've been talking about...the sin the brought you to be loyal to Lounaru....Lou....?"

Flashback

"Mom, please, don't die...!"

".....I should of died....long time ago....I love you Ryan, and your sister, remember that always....tell Lemon not to feel guilty anymore for me.....Ryan....it was nice seeing you again before I die...it makes me....happy."

End flashback.

"No wait...mom did not blame you....she did not want you to feel guilty..."

"W...What are you talking about!?" Lemon looked baffled. "Kid, are you crazy or something."

"I...I think so....I don't know....But, I know that this is not real...." Ryan looked at his father's sword and tossed it to the ground, with an bitter frown, and looked at him small hands, covered in a light brown fur, out of the corner of his eye his could see his red hair. He shook his head.

"No...wait a minuet...This is not me. This is not who I am....Ryan died.....I'm not this Ryan...."

FLASH

"Rya! Rya!"

Ryan felt something wet licking his cheek. He opened his eyes and saw his friend Mara, sixteen years of age smiling sweetly at him.

"M...Mara?" He asked startled, setting up in bed, staring at her shocked.

"Oh Rya! Good morning! Boy, you seem out of it. Are you ok, that was some training session you had With Keith last night...I was so worried. I told you not to fight against him...he is really mean and fights really unfair! Heck, if I didn't come when I did he might of killed you."

"..........."

"Oh...." She reached out, running her finger over his face. "Would you look at that, he left a scar on your face. That jerk! My poor little, Rya, your beautiful face has been scared."

Ryan put his hand to his face, blinking confused. `A scar....'

"Rya? You seem really out of it. Are you ok?" Mara asked worriedly.

"Was this all a dream?" He blinked puzzled.

"What?"

"Maybe it was." He smiled, hopefully. "Maybe the whole thing was just a nightmare....it has to have been....yes it was just to weird to be real..."

"Rya, what are you talking about?"

"It's nothing. It's just that....I had a terrible nightmare....and we had to endure so much suffering....and...."

"Awww, Rya, it was just a silly old dream. Come on, get dressed you don't want to get in trouble with Mr Tarlos."

"Yeah. I'll see you in class?"

"Sure." The cat girl smiled, leaving him.

Ryan began to pull on his school uniform. Maybe the whole adventure had just been a dream... Yeah, one long and painful nightmare. Maybe this was the real him. Just a regular, high school guy.

************************************

"So, you finally decided to join us Ryan?" Mr.Tarlos announced as the boy walked into the room in the middle of period.

"Uh, yeah, sorry sir."

" Take a seat!"

"Rya!!"

"Hey Ryan!!"

Two female voices chimed, and he turned to look gasping eyes growing wide in shock as he spotted both Ruto and Mara setting down in their seats, pointing to an empty desk in-between them. He slowly walked over to them, an dazed and confused expression plastered on his face. Ruto smirked at him, leaning her head to the side to get a better look at his face as he sat down. He could feel his heart pound in his chest, as she stared up at him.

"Ha..." She laughed suddenly. " I thought you said you wouldn't get yourself beat up."

"uhhh, I...."

"Oh, Ruto!" Mara frowned. "Don't tease him, he had a bad nightmare last night."

"Yeah I know." A voice said from behind them, and Ryan turned around to see Alex. "My room is right next to his, and I could hear him moaning and screaming all night long. You can be so annoying."

"Oh, big brother!" Ruto rolled her eyes. " I swear, you kept more people up then Ryan last night, I mean, do you know how *loud* you snore?"

"Alex!? Your hear too!?" Ryan blinked confused.

"Hey! This is not a chat hall!" Mr. Tarlos snapped. "Get out you history books, we are going to review more about the burning times and...."

"I HATE THIS LESSON!!!"

"There she goes again..." Ruto rolled her eyes, and turned around. "CARRIE!! We know your a witch already! You don't have to take a fit every time we have this lesson! Kathy does not do that!"

Ryan looked at the blue haired girl in shock. She was frowning, fiddling with her pencil.

"Well, I'm not Kathy!"

"Ms. Fernandez, to Jabora's office, right now!" Mr. Tarlos hissed.

"Hmmmph!"

"That Fernandez girl." Mara shook her head. "She is only twelve but is highly advanced in magic....but she is so sensitive about witch or sorceress killings, and she takes a fit every time! She'll get kicked out of school at this rate."

"..................."

"Ryan, are you ok?" Ruto asked, titling her head to the side questionably.

"Uh...yeah, I'm fine."

"What class do you have next? I'm stuck with fencing. I'm no good at handling swords. I don't see how you can be so good at it...oh well."

"Ummm...." Ryan opened his binder and looked at the copy of his school. "Oh, I have religion."

"B.o.r.e.i.n.g."

"Yeah....uh....Ruto?"

"Yes...?"

"Um..." Ryan could feel his cheeks heat up.

"You want to ask me to the dance, this Friday?" Ruto looked at him hopeful.

"Uhh...."

"Hey! Hey! Ruto! Remember our deal, he chooses one of us on his own! Best friends do NOT, do not go back on their word! Besides...." Mara latches on to his arm. "He's taking me!"

"No, he's not!" Ruto frowned.

"Is too!"

"Is not!"

"Too!"

"Not!"

"Too!"

"Not!"

"Too!"

"Not!"

"Too!"

"Not!"

"SHUT UP!!" The teacher screamed. "You two may go to Jambora's office as well!"

"Aww, damn." Ruto hit her fist on the desk.

"Not again. This happens every class, Ruto!"

"I know, it really sucks."

"Yeah."

Ryan watched the two girls leave, and turned confused, looking back at the pages of his book.

`Ruto....Alex and Carrie why are they hear? Could it be....that every one of my friends was actually in reality, people I knew from school and I dreamed of them in different roles? Like characters out of a book or TV show? Could this all really be true...?'

***********************************

Ryan walked to his next class, walking in her gasped, spotting Genki setting at his desk, doodling in his book, an bored expression on his face.

"Genki!" Ryan exclaimed walking up to the desk.

"Yeah? What?" The boy looked up at him confused.

"I'm so glad your alive!" Ryan exclaimed, throwing his arms around him, crying in joy....everything was going normal...His friends was not dead, there was no goddesses, no orbs, he was a normal teenager!

"Auhhhh...." Genki blinked confused as Ryan let him go. "Keith's right, you are weird..."

"Ah....It's just I had a terrible dream, in it I had to watch you and all my friends die and....it seemed so real!"

Genki grinned, looking at him in a strange way. "Oh? So I am one of your friends? Hey....I always thought you didn't like me. Keith must of really knocked some screws loose last night."

"...." Ryan chuckled slightly, surprising the hyper boy. "Your right, I think maybe he did."

"What? Hey, aren't you suppose to get mad or something?" Genki looked confused as Ryan walked over to his desk and sat down.

"Naw, I'm not...I'm not in any mood to be mad...not when I am so happy!" he exclaimed, laughing joyfully.

Genki continued giving him an odd look as did the rest of the class at his odd behavior. The classes attention turned away from him as someone else entered the room, and instantly paper balls flew.

"Wahhh!!!" A blond boy cried, shielding his face with his books, as the paper balls and eraser chunks hit him.

Ryan turned to look and spotted Lemon, who slowly lowered the binder.

"Why is it, every class you do that?" The Dampire pouted.

"Your a freak!"

"Girlie man!"

"Weirdo!"

Different voices chimed out, but Lemon was unaffected and just stuck his thoung out bitterly at the rest of the class, before stomping down the row and sat in the seat infront of Genki.

"Hey Lem!"

"Genki, can't you invent a paper ball repellent or something?"

"Ah...I'll tell you what. I'll try my best."

"Thanks." Lemon turned towards Ryan and smiled. "Ah! My half-breaded friend! How are you today? Did you get anything thrown at you yet?"

"...N....No, Lemon....I? Your all right?"

"Wha...."

"Lemon, he's been acting weird. He came up and hugged me, saying he was glad I'm still alive....I think Keith knocked some senses out...." Genki looked worried.

Lemon laughed out loud. "You hugged Genki!? Wow Keith must really have bashed you over the head or maybe...maybe Ruto and Mara drove you off the deep end..."

"Lemon, you would not believe the nightmare I had."

"Was I in it?"

"Yeah. You were."

"Cool! What role did I play?"

"Well, um...in the dream at one point you were part devil."

"Ha! Really!? Cool...I could have read peoples minds and such!" Lemon giggled.

"And....well, you and Squall were in love and you had a baby named Pan and...."

"Back up! Back up!" Lemon looked flabbergasted while Genki began to laugh his head off, hitting his desk with a fist as he tried to control his giggles.

"What?" Ryan blinked confused.

"Me and Squall?" Lemon looked ill. "You know he picks on my every single day! I swear...Grrr....that man-beast....he threw me in trash can yesterday! And....what's this about me having a baby....grrrrrr.....what the sleeping mind thinks up....I don't look that much like a girl."

"Uhhh...."

"I DO NOT, look that much like a girl."

"Try saying that without the short skirt on Lemon. Wear the male school uniform next time." Genki teased, causing Lemon to huff and look away.

`Wow....this is weird....Lemon and Squall enemies....? Or maybe they aren't.....I don't know....Why can't I remember anything? My mind must still be to focused on that dream.'

"Oy! Ryan!" Genki whispered.

"What?"

"I forgot to tell you, Keith told me to tell you that you better take Ruto to the dance because he wants to ask Mara."

".................."

"He is crazy about that cat." Genki frowned, shaking his head. " His room is covered with pictures. Mara is all right looking but....I don't like popular girls like her all that much....They always act so....ditzy and unreasonable, and so vain....and..."

Lemon smirked meanly. "You like." he looked towards the front of the room where Mimi walked in, holding her books closely. "Shy girls, right?"

Genki blushed, and began fiddling with his pen, he looked up as some kids threw some paper balls at her. He frowned, standing up in his desk.

"Hey! Anyone else throws a paper ball at her and Keith and I will beat you up after school!"

The other kids trembled and let their paper balls fall to the ground. Mimi blushed, and bowed her head in thanks and took her seat.

"Why didn't you protect me from any paper balls?" Lemon sniffed.

"Your a...'man' you can take care of yourself."

"I'll pretend I did not hear that hint of sarcasm...." Lemon turned away and opened his book.

Ryan sat in silence, he still felt out of it. Things were just going....to perfect. Could this all be real....yes, it had to be....it just had to be.

*******************************

It was lunch time and he, Genki and Lemon walked out of the class, talking, when the Dampire yelped, hiding behind Ryan's back as he saw Squall approach.

"Hey....so, you got out of the trash?"

"....Grrrrrrrrrr....."

"Come on sissy, I doubt you'll get out again." Squall reached out and grabbed him by the wrist and threw him over his shoulder.

"Nooo!! Not again!! Squall, let me go right now!!" Lemon whined, kicking him but was carried away anyway.

"Uhh..." Ryan blinked.

"That always happens to him, everyday...." Genki shook his head.

"Hey! Puberty boy! What are you doing hanging out with chicken wuss!?" Keith called, causing both boys to turn around. Keith stood there with Arisu and Nagisa at his side.

"Oh! I'm helping him! You see, I think you gave him amnesia! All he can remember is this bizzar dream!" Genki shouted back. Keith dawned an amused expression, and approached, looking at Ryan with a smug look.

"Really?"

"Hey, Ryan!" Genki laughed. "What role did Keith play in your dream?"

"One of the bad guys."

The hyper boy laughed, while Keith rolled his eyes.

"I'm sure I did. So you really can't remember anything?"

"No."

"Hmmmmm." Keith smirked. "Did my cousin tell you that, you really look up to me? Oh and that right now you are trying to play match maker between Mara and I and...."

Ryan did not look amused. "I think your lying."

"He is Ryan. Really." Genki informed. "But I think I should remind you that, you owe me 50$...."

"Nice try." Keith nudged him. "He doesn't even have fifty dollars. Let's go, see you later chicken wuss."

Ryan looked at Keith and Genki who walked off in the opposite direction....hmmm, in this world....no this reality...Keith and Genki must actually be friendly with each other.

"Hey, Ryan, are we meeting the other's down in the lunch room?" Mimi asked, coming up to him.

"Oh, uh...."

"Is it true you are suffering from amnesia? Poor Ryan....Maybe I can try one of my healing spells on you later."

"Th...Thanks."

Mimi looked at Genki and Keith as they left. "I can't believe those two are so closely related...and they are best friends but, they act so different from each other. I hope Keith does not have any negative affect on him in the future...."

"Um...."

"Well, let's get going....and in case you forgot, let's cut through the back of the school and go in through the back doors, that way we wont get hit by paper balls as we pass through the halls."

"Why do people throw stuff at us?"

Mimi smiled weakly. " You, Lemon, your sister, and I are the only half breeds in this school, that's why."

"That's kind of unfair..." Ryan frowned.

"I know, but it happens to every half-breed so it's really nothing personal. Well, let's go."

*************************************

"Auuuuu....." Lemon groaned, feet sticking out of the dumpster in the back of the school. Mimi shook her head.

"Lemon, are you ok?"

"Squall can be so mean...." The Dampire mumbled. "If it's not to much trouble....can you help me out of hear?"

Ryan and Mimi pulled him out and he landed on the ground, dirty, a banana peal on his head.

"Maybe you should go wash up before lunch." The fairy-half suggested.

".....Your not serious....bathroom....at lunch time? That will just be asking to be toilet papered!!"

"Well, toilette paper or have food thrown at you and then get the name `Smelly' for the rest of you school life as well as the names `girlie boy' `cross dresser' `weirdo and `freaky.' "

"Hmmmm...." Lemon looked thoughtful. "So in other words I would be called a `smelly weirdo, and a freaky girlie boy cross dresser."

"We'll meet you in the lunch room." Mimi smiled, and her and Ryan left, entering the school.

**************************************

Both brought their hands up infront of them to avoid the onslaught of meat balls.

"Tiny shrimp!"

"Demon!!"

"Disney is looking for a opening for a tinker bell role!"

"Oh yeah! The devil called he's missing one of his demons, better get back to hell Ryan!"

"HEY SHUT UP!! EXPLOSION!!!" Ruto growled, blasting the taunting kids sky high.

"Rya!! Over hear!" Mara waved to a bench where she, Ruto, Alex, Parfait, and Colt sat.

Mimi and Ryan wondered over, and the cat and Ruto made room in-between each other so Ryan could set in-between them.

"So are you still out of it?" Ruto asked.

"Uhh....yeah, I still can't remember anything."

"Big brother has amnesia? Oh! That Keith is so mean!" Parfait growled.

"Where is Lemon?" Colt asked. "Did my older brother get him again?"

"Oh, yeah." Mimi nodded. "Dumpster, I swear, Squall can be merciless."

"I'll try to talk to him...." The younger man beast frowned.

"WAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" Genki screamed running into the lunch room, holding a photograph, Keith running after him with his sword.

"G.E.N.K.I!!!" He growled.

Everyone in the lunch room turned to the pair amused.

Genki hopped up on a lunch table, nearly avoiding a strike with the blade. "Hahahahahaha!!! You can't catch me!"

"Oh yes I can, puberty boy!!!" Keith began to chase him around the table.

Ryan exchanged looks with his friends.

"Genki always does something....every time. He's going to get Keith to kill him one of these days." Mara shook her head.

"What joke did he play this time, I wonder." Mimi continued to watch.

"GIVE ME THAT PICTURE!!!!"

"Not until you agree to stop using my computer to look up prone sites! The teacher checks our lab tops you know!! Do you have any idea the hell of the time I had explaining to Jabora why I had porn site....especially a male porn site saved to the book marks!?"

Everyone gasped in shock.

"I went into the male one by accident!!" Keith growled at all the shocked stares. "Besides, it has some links to some sites with pictures of beautiful girls on it."

"....I can only hope! I'm stuck sharing a room with you after all!"

The people in the lunch room begins to laugh.

"Fine! I wont bookmark any more porn sites! Now give me that CLEARLY ALTERED, photograph!"

Genki began to laugh as Keith continued to chase him, as Genki ran past Ryan's table he dropped the photograph and Ryan snatched it before it hit the ground, he looked at it and instantly began to laugh loudly, pointing at it. The other members of the table leaned forward to catch a glimpse of it and instantly started to laugh loudly, some wiping tears away from their eyes.

The picture was altered on Genki's computer but it was still hilarious to look at. In it Keith was wearing a big diaper, and frilly pink bonnet, and in his hand, instead of his sword was a baby bottle. At the bottom of the picture Genki had written on it in quotation

marks `I'm a big boy now.'

Keith looked like he was going to have a heart attack and quickly snatched the photo away. Genki was laughing his head off, in a high pitched giggle.

"Genki....I swear....YOUR A DEAD MAN!!!" Keith growled and charged at him his sword, seeing that he was serious, Genki screamed and dashed out of the lunch room, Keith still following him.

Lemon walked into the lunch room, after getting shoved out of the way by the two boys, and quietly tip toed over to the lunch table, not wanting anything to be thrown at him. He sat down beside Mimi, breathing in relief.

"Good thing I can fly or else I would not have escaped the bathroom alive....all that blasted toilette paper...."

"Poor Lemon." Colt frowned. "Squall didn't hurt you to much today, did he?"

"Colt....all I can say is....I don't see how you can be so nice and your brother so rotten...." Lemon opened his lunch bag and pulled out a black water bottle and took a big gulp.

"Mmmmm, type B, but favorite...."

"Ewwww..." Mara stuck her thounge out and reach in her lunch bag for her sardines.

The group ate lunch calmly when an loud song began to play, the looked over at the table where all the football players and cheer leaders sat. Three of the girls, all of which Ryan recognized as Lima, Rose and Pai-Pai stood up on the table, shaking their hips as they danced sexily to the music in their short cheerleader skirts and tight short tops, the boys hooting and touching them.

"Yuck, I hate those girls." Ruto frowned, looking away. "They are such snobby and stupid sluts."

"Yeah." Mara nodded. "I was once offered to be a cheerleader but....I have some dignity, unlike some people."

"Hey Ryan, why are you staring?" Parfait asked, blinking.

"Yeah, Ryan, why are you?' Mara and Ruto gave him an evil glare.

"Nothing, it's just that, they were in the dream to."

"Really, what role did they play, the sluts?" Ruto asked bluntly.

"Now that we are on the subject tell us what roles all of us played." Mara asked, smiling. "I bet, I'm his girlfriend in it."

"You are not!"

"I am too!"

"Are not!"

"Are too!"

"Not!"

"Too!"

"Not!"

"Too!"

"Not!"

"Too!"

"Uh...." Ryan blinked. "Can I tell the story?"

"Oh ok, go ahead." The two girls stopped arguing and got ready to listen.

"Well, um, in the dream, I dreamt that there was an evil goddess trying tot take over the world and that we had to save the world from her. I was the guardian of light, and you Mimi had something called the orb of hope. Carrie, Squall, Lemon, Genki, Lima, and Alex also had orbs. Where the dream left off I dreamt that I wasn't real and that I doomed the whole world."

"Strange dream, what were we all like in the dream?" Alex asked before stuffing a fork full of salad into his mouth.

"Well, Alex, you were a solider, very expressionless and in the dream you killed yourself to destory an machine that sucked Magention from the planet."

"Hmmm...."

"My brother do something heroic?" Ruto frowned. "That sexist pig?"

"Humph!"

Ryan smiled weakly. "And in the dream you two weren't related either. In fact you were a princess and it was his duty to protect you, but you were also the goddesses. We were trying to save you and had to travel all the way to Angeles, and then in the end we did save you but....then....then Saiyoua summoned Oisa...and...." Ryan hook his head. `It was just a dream....a dream...that is all it was....'

"Lots of other people were in the dream to, like you Mara, you killed yourself early on in the dream, but you came back much later on but then I find out that the one that returned was only a clone." Ryan looked troubled. "Lima was in the dream to, believe it or not, in the dream she was half cyborg cop, but still very silly, Pai-Pai was the original holder of the orb of love but she was killed. Rose was in are group to, but she was originally one of the bad guys. In the dream, Carrie's family got killed and she wanted to avenge them and Colt, you were dating her....and you and Squall weren't brothers either. And Genki he was...he was a `one winged angel' but he died...and Mimi you were crying so hard..." Ryan's face began to go pale. "Parfait she was being controlled by Taromecika and was turned into this evil woman named Hikari....but I saved her...then...we found Keith who believed himself to be the son of Saiyoua...and he had the body of the real Mara hanging on his wall. Lemon....he was hurt and dying after saving us all from Saiyoua's control...and Colt....he could no longer walk....then I....then I...I found out that I wasn't real....that....That I was just a clone created out of Kamertion....and....I gave the goddess stone to Saiyoua......." He stood up in his chair, shaking. "It wasn't a dream, was it? This is not real is it?"

The area around him blurred and everything disappeared leaving him standing in the center of a dark void. Ruto stood before him, dressed in the school uniform, hair blowing back if by an invisible force.

"Don't doubt this reality Ryan. If you believe it, all this could be true, believe this is what is real...Your dream, your adventure, it was all just made up..."

"No it wasn't. I remember ever single thing about it. Keith and I along with Mimi and Arisu went to the training center to have a game of skill, but all the monsters had went crazy and were out to kill, we escaped only to find the body of a 5th rank student completely butchered, the next day we went to temple Anju and that was how the whole adventure started. Genki, Mimi and I were given orbs and sent away on our destiny. We had to kill Kathy one of our friends who was taken over by the darkness, we hurried back to school and found it burning, that was the fist time I met Taromecika. I tried to save my sister but she was taken away from me, and that was when I was told of my mission, to find the orbs. The next day, Mara, Keith, Genki, Mimi and I set out on our adventure and we met you, we battled a water demon together and that was the first time we met Cid when he saved us and then left. It was not long after that when we came across Carrie and the burnt carnage of her family, we had found one of the orbs and we traveled together for awhile before we came across this hunted hotel, it was a great chance to get to know each other better...we then met Squall as he tried to save his sister by having to destory his one time lover...sadly both got destory, and Squall was left without anyone for along time, but we found the orb of friendship, hidden inside of him and we continued our journey together. Then we had to go on this ship to get to the next town and that was where....that was were Ruto and I first kissed. We sang my mother's....Ryan's mother's song together...I wish I told you then how I felt. After that we met an elf named Pai-Pai who stole from us to get money to save her brother's life...we found the orb of love but sadly Pai-Pai and her brother along with her boyfriend all died, and we thought Keith had died as well. We went to Ellen woods and passed the orb of love onto Lima, as Pai-Pai's last wish. We swam together in that lake...Ruto and I then we crept into the hotel and fell asleep, each dreaming of the other. I still remember the anger and fear I had when Lounaru held you in his clutches...

after that, we had stumbled on a trap and we were forced to play silly games to save our lives. We then got to Angelo and I found out that you were really the princess Marie-Maya, I thought I lost you forever....I thought we had to say goodbye....I thought it was over. I felt so much pain, the loss I felt I could not bare...I didn't want to loose you. When I heard you were in danger I ran as fast as I could to Angelo castle and saw you being held captive by Keith whom I thought was dead...and Mara whom in anger wanted you dead. I was thrown off of the balcony and you revealed to me your wings...you were so beautiful. I wanted to stay right next to you forever. That day, it brought many ends and beginnings...The real Mara's death...and Alex joining our group. You came back to me...I was so happy....to be with you again. I still remember our little adventure we had after that, with the `holy spell of divine power' when I thought back on it, I could not help but laugh...it was a good break from the seriousness of our adventures, but after that...I did something I still regret to this day...We made love and I was just to much of a...as Keith cwould all me a `chicken wuss' to say anything to you after and I hurt you deeply. I can still remember the look of pain in your eyes....and I never got to apologize for it...Lemon joined our group that day, at least you were reunited with your childhood friend, it was nice to see you smile...but the pain still remained in your eyes. After that, with all the robs found we headed back to the school, but on the way we stopped to get to know each other better, telling stories of our past. Some happy, some sad, some crazy...and some...we had no past at all. When we got to the school, we thought for sure we had won...how stupid of us. Taromecika attacked, and we were all forced to battle. Everyone of us was captured and you...you got caught because of my stupidity and hurtful words to you...how could I have been so uncaring about that night....why couldn't I just accept how I felt? I still remember the empty look on your face, as you took the goddess chalice in your hands and Saiyoua took over your beautiful soul...I thought I've lost you forever...and it was all my fault....I couldn't do anything....nothing at all. After that we learned of what we must do to find the true Goddess Stone and we met Kim and Amy, Cid had one of the shards of the Goddess stone within his heart and he died, willingly because of it, to save the worlds. Soon after that, I found the first hints that I was not Ryan...that I was someone else....that I was a puppet. I went crazy...and attacked everyone...but Lounaru, no, Lou snapped me out of it...I don't want to think of what would have happened if she didn't. We traveled a bit more, the others somehow forgave me. Lemon got sick and was dying because he couldn't feed, but Squall....he saved him....at least he wasn't afraid to admit he loved Lemon, he just didn't know how much and what kind of love, yet. We were offered a part in a movie a week or so after that...though it was fun I could never forget about the pain I felt inside at the lost of you. The next while after that, thanks to the a few members of our group we were forced to all switch genders for awhile to pass threw an amazon village and then to the girl's or at the moment, boy's suggestion to join a `beauty contest.' It was on the day of the contest that we were first informed about the two clones Of Saiyoua....I just never dreamed that I was one of them. I found Mara in the next village a weak or so after we all turned back to normal...I was so happy that she was all right, that she was back in my life. I didn't love her, but she was my best friend....and in that way I cared for her....but it wasn't Mara...it was just a clone, but I can take comfort in the fact that everything about her was the same as Mara, so that means that the real Mara to, would have forgiven me. Karl was then destroyed by Yuu, a girl who had loved him from our school, and Lena we thought had been killed by her sisters. This was the same day I think Lemon and Squall fully admitted how much they loved each other....I'm glad they weren't fools like I. After that we came to Mimi's village, it was to be a wonderful party...but it ended in a blood bath as the village was destroyed. The look of agony and pain on her face was implanted in my mind...I hated Taromecika even more at that moment....for what he did to one of the kindest people I ever met. We came to a village, were I got sick, and my friends met one of the original heros Karen...whom I never fathomed was my aunt. It was then Keith told me I was his puppet, I didn't want to believe it but...he controlled me....and made me almost kill Lemon....made me attack my friends....but then I was told much later one that I became an angel with golden wings and I....no...I'm getting confused....my mind is trying to block this out....I don't know why, but after that we were trapped in a real horror movie as this little girl, possessed with darkness went around killing us all. We all did die I think, but somehow, Genki found the power inside of him to return us all back to life....who knows maybe in doing soon so, shortened his own life span. After the nightmare was over, we found by some strange chance of faith that Lemon was pregnant with Squall's baby...it still confuses me. After all that, Genki's courage and strength of will, was really put to the test as he was forced to fight, angry and filled with intense rage at Rex for raping Mimi...I don't blame him...if I could of fought Rex I would of killed him for what he did. Genki sprouted gray wings during the fight, but one was ripped off...but...being a `one winged angel...' it seemed to be somehow right for Genki. Still...in the end, he could of killed Rex and had his fill of revenge but he didn't...even after feeling pure rage and hate he never lost his innocence...he refused to kill Rex and in the end, Rex killed himself. We came to an village where Alex spent many suffering years of his life and I learned alot more about him that day....I can see now why he wanted to keep his emotions to himself...A few weeks after...we all wanted to give up and cry, to many bad things were happening to us....Lemon was faced with a choice, kill his baby and live or have the baby and die himself...he choose to have the baby. We all thought he was dead...and Squall was crushed. I couldn't find strength inside go myself to continue, so many of my friends were dying and suffering and I couldn't do anything to help...but you came to me in a vision and you gave me the courage I needed and in the end everything was ok. I got sick again when Lexy, Tommy and Rose began slaughtering children....it was horrible and still today, even though Rose has joined our cause...I can't help but see her in my eyes as a monstrous creature who slaughtered hundreds of children. It's horrible of me, I pretend I forgave her but I can't....she was of total free will when she killed all those people. How can I forgive her....? She's not a puppet like me, she can control what she does. If I could control my actions I would never think of harming anyone. I almost died, my body was falling apart, I needed an operation or else I would die.....as dead as a clone could be, and Mara started performing to get money....and ended up getting raped....Keith couldn't stand seeing that, even though a clone, that Mara forgave me, and he wanted to hurt her. He raped her and she was left in an pitiful attempt to convince herself later, after horrible visions, of who she really was. She believed so much that she was the real Mara...all that struggle to find out that she was believing an lie. She was....only a clone, just like me. Squall almost ended up loosing Lemon soon after...not because of his foolishness to tell him how he really felt, but because of mistrust, I'm glad that he realized what he was doing and saved their relationship before he destroyed it....like I did between us.

After that, I did I horrible thing to Rose, I killed the one she loved...I never thought twice that those on Taromeicka's side could have feelings.

Genki was struck down after that, I don't know all of what happened to him but he seemed to have won some kind of battle within his own mind...something I always fail to do, but soon after that he was captured by Kim and Amy whom soon in turn got killed by Lexy whom ended up getting killed herself by Genki. Three of the four pieces of the goddesses stone was found, we took them with us, but we didn't want to have to kill anyone...we didn't want to sacrifice anyone else's life. We came to Alex's home town, and he was forced to watch the woman he loved die, and his best friend sacrifice himself. But Alex ended up saving us all from the devil himself. I then went head to head in a battle with Rose, and I saw a vision of Ruto whom gave to me a winged sword...and I was able to save Rose from the darkness and she turned to our side. Saving her, was the only way I could make up for my sin of killing her true love. We then entered Angeles...It is a city that I never want to see again. As Keith, Genki and I, the three Angeles fought together in the sky, Alex was in the Magention factory. I can still seeing him standing there, the self detention in his hand, his eyes shimmering with an emotion, I only recognized as sorrow at that last minuet, and realized that all this time, he just wanted to cry...then he pushed the switch, weakening the goddess as he destroyed her Magention supply...but also destroyed himself. Saiyoua took advantage of our sorrow and made us relive our painful memories and sins...I only saw darkness...the black ocean...I'm always trapped in the black ocean. Lemon freed us all at the expense of his human side and his wings....and maybe even his life. We then went for a full assault on Saiyoua...so many things happened, I saved my sister, whom was the evil woman Hikari the whole time...Genki was killed...I still can't believe it...I was not able to save any of my friends....Not Mara, not Colt, not Ruto, not Alex, not Lemon and not Genki either. The goddess stone was found, the last orb was inside of Genki's own soul. I carried the stone with me, my friends thinking that the light could keep it safe....how stupid. After that I found out that the mad man, Lounaru was all this time an woman named Lou, one of the original hero's and mine...no! Ryan's mother. I wept over her body and then continued, and found out the truth. I was in shock when I saw Mara's body hanging from the wall, but the shock from what I found out about myself made what I felt at that moment, nothing. Ryan died six years ago at the school dance, I was a copy made of stolen Magention and my flesh made of Saiyoua's Kamertion. I was nothing but a puppet, a slave, a man-made doll. Mara was wiped out of existence with a push of a button, I can't say she was killed...she was only a copy, and copies don't have souls, the real Mara killed herself a long time ago. A copy don't have a soul....I guess I don't have one either then. Of course I don't. I found out the real Ryan's past after battling Taromecika, the man I hated was my...no! no! no! The man I hated was Ryan's father. I accepted my faith...I guess I went crazy, I joined Saiyoua. I was her puppet after all. I fought my friends along side of Keith, we swat them down like flies...I'm pained to think back to the looks on their faces...I...after that, I...after that

FLASH

No!!

Forgive me...

Ryan placed the stone into Saiyoua's hands the world was engulfed in a black light.

FLASH

Ryan stared at the image of Ruto, face dawning an strange expression. "After that I....killed everyone."

"..............."

Ryan looked down at his hands. "These hands did the deed that will destory the planets...I....I killed everyone."

The image of Ruto scowled, disappearing in thin air, but her voice echoed around him.

"Your not a normal teenager, your not Ryan, are your truly a puppet? Are you really crazy? What are you then? What are you?" Her voice was almost mocking.

"I'm....I..." Ryan trembled looking down at his hands in shock, before he lowered them, his eyes shimmering with tears and regret. "I am a fool."

************************************

Bra sat at her computer, eyes red, body limp, looking as though she was about to pass out, but still she searched for a cure. She typed around on the computer, trying to find the missing component. She entered in some chemicals and DNA and stuff and added them to Maria's mixture, the computer began scanning to see compatibility, to see if this would work. Bra lowered her eyes to the floor, this was about the millionth time she tried...it was probably all for nothing. A beep on her computer altered her and she turned expecting to see the big red letters that spelt out `ERROR' but to her shock and disbelief she saw the words on the screen saying

`Sample compatible, scan completed.'

An silly grin appeared on her face and she started to laugh loudly, tears coming to her eyes, laughing for the first time in months.