Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ MEOW! Kitti's FFVII Talk Show! ❯ Is it Heideggar?! Or not? ( Chapter 5 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
Meow! Kitti's FFVII Talk Show.

Kitti: Wow! I haven't updated in awhile! About a couple of weeks! Sorry, I haven't updated much! I just been...ok, I wasn't busy. I was being attacked with radishes. *gets hit in the head with a glue bottle* OW! WHYJA DO THAT?!

Cloud: Cuz I felt like it.

Kitti: Grrrrr....anyway, I was lazy. And he is my guest star today.

Cloud: No, I'm not.

Kitti: WHAT?!

Cloud: I'm waiting for the arrival for my arch nemesis.

Kitti: Rufus?

Cloud: HE'S HERE?!

Kitti: err...no. Anyway, maybe if you wait, he'll come. So can you be my guest star?

Cloud: I must leave! *runs off*

Kitti: Uh-oh. I have no guest star! What am I to do? Hummmm....

audience member: Get someone else?

Kitti: THAT'S CRAZY ENOUGH TO WORK! *grins* I know! *runs outside*

Vincent: *in audience* Thank God, I thought she was going to pick me.

Yuffie: No joke. That was pure insanity.

Sephiroth: SHE'S pure insanity.

Vincent & Yuffie: Agreed! But who'll she pick?

Kitti: My guest is...

*everyone anticipates for the guest*

Kitti: Err....OK THIS WAS DESPERATE, I WAS REALLY DESPERATE!

Vincent: OH GOD, YOU DIDN'T!

Yuffie: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, YOU COULDN'T, HOW COULD YOU?1

Sephiroth: EVEN I'M NOT THAT EVIL! Ok, so maybe I am, BUT HE'S STILL VERY VERY EVIIIIILLLLL!

Kitti: It's true....it's true, I had too. *crying* I was sooo desperate!

Heideggar: Hey everyone!

*audience scream and all heck broke lose*

Kitti: HEY! I'M JUST KIDDING!

*everybody celebrates*

Kitti: Heideggar is actually...Palmer in a bunny outfit!

*Vincent throws a donut at her*

Kitti: OWIE! OK! OK! It's actually Cid!

Cid: Wassup.

Kitti: NOW WE CAN START THE SHOW! Do I own you or anybody else in this story?

Cid: %@#$ no!

Kitti: You heard the man. So who wants to ask a question? Dude with the spikey hair, and 6,900 tattoos!

Tattoo Man: Are you truly the #1 bad mouth in the world?

Cid: $%^& Straight.

Tattoo Man: I bet you I can beat you!

Cid: Bring it *&^%$# on!

Kitti: We better take a commercial now before everyone's ears need to be scrubbed!

*COMMERCIAL*

Rufus: We here at ShinRa Corps. are offering you a chance of a lifetime...isn't that right my lady?

Mysterious Lady: Yes, my sir, you can join The ShinRa Strawberry Soldiers!

Rufus: Yes, and help us destroy Kitti once and for all!

Mysterious Lady: Is it time for the evil laugh now?

Rufus: Yes, it is.

Rufus & Mysterious lady Laughs evily

*End*

Kitti: O_O......................................

Cid: Dang, that guy is !@#$%^& after you.

Kitti: O_O ::falls over::

Vincent: Either she passed out from the commercial or she passed out from Cid and the other dude.

Yuffie: Hey, I got a question Cid!

Cid: Spill it.

Yuffie: What's with this tea?

Cid: When I made Cid's ~!@#$%^ Tea for the first time, I felt so refreshed and had a warm feeling of energy, I couldn't keep this to myself because it wouldn't be the right thing to do and I thought the world would be at peace if I shared it with the world!

Sephiroth: BUT IT TASTES NASTY!

Cid: SHUT UP, *&^%$#$#!

Sephiroth: *Draws out his sword* Say that again! I dare you!

*Suddenly Cloud swings from the ceiling and grabs Kitti and flies away before anyone could catch her*

Vincent & Yuffie: ...........

Kitti: *wakes up* Ugh....Where am...Cloud???

Cloud: Don't worry miss Kitti. I will protect you from Rufus! It is my duty.

Kitti: Oh Thank you, Cloud! Thank You! But wait! WHAT ABOUT MY PENNNIIIIIIEEE----
*static*

A/N: Looks like I'm now gonna be off the air...But the show must go on! So what will happen next time? Looks Like I'll need a replacement...I'm still gonna write all this, not other people. I'll just have a new host! Hehehe...Well baiyas!