Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ TKO- Total Knock Out ❯ Chapter 20 ( Chapter 20 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

chapter 20

Squall and Zell were at the arena in the ring suited up to box for practice. There were only a few others there during that time practicing on the floor. Zell had on his red gloves and Squall had on the black. They were wearing comfortable jeans and sleeveless shirts.

They both bounced around each other and Zell went in for a jab but Squall moved away from it. Zell tried again but still couldn't land a punch. "You have to do better than that if you wanna win Friday." Squall said and Zell frowned and tried punching faster but still couldn't land anything and Squall hit him in the face knocking Zell's head back. "There's nothing wrong with your speed its your timing and aim now hit me!" Squall said practically growling at him. Zell shook his head off got back in his stance trying to focus.

'Why can't I concentrate?' He asked himself and looked at Squall moving around in front of him when he tried to punch him his hand slowed down and stopped becasue an image of Seifer appeared where Squall was. "Shit." Zell said quielty and Squall frowned at him getting annoyed with his poor performance and tapped him lightly on the forehead with his glove. "Focus." "I am, I am." They started bouncing around again and Squall was throwing punches at Zell, he dodged a few times but got hit on the last one. Zell hesitated at first before throwing his arm out at Squall and stopped again seeing another Seifer image appear. "Come on chicken hit me, I already hurt you hurt me back if you think you can." The mental image Seifer said then he laughed at Zell. Zell got furious and started punching quickly at Squall who was surprised and started backing up a bit blocking as much as he could.

'Fucking jerk, how could you do that to me then leave me like yesterdays dinner?' Zell thought getting angrier still focusing on the image of Seifer. "That's better but you could lighten up. I am retired remember." Squall said and Zell was about to hit him hard thinking of Seifer and what he did to him but then he stopped his fist and dropped his hands. His head fell forward afterwards then he sat down where he stood putting his face in his gloves.

Squall looked down at him strangely then went over and crouched in front of him sighing. "Are you gonna tell me what's wrong now?" He asked Zell shook his head which was still held in his hands and Squall looked away at the other people in the arena then back to Zell; he grabbed Zell's arms and pulled him up with him walking them out of the ring. Squall dragged Zell to the locker room and they sat on a bench.

"You've been acting like this all day and now its throwing off your game. If you don't want that to happen Friday tell me what's wrong so I can help you." Squall said leaning forwards looking in Zell's direction. "You know what's wrong remeber, you told me. My aim sucks and I have bad timing." Zell mumbled resting his chin on his gloves. Squall furrowed his brow. "Not that, what's really wrong with you not your fighting?" Zell sighed and dropped his hands letting them dangle by his knees. 'Its wrong for me to keep this from him but its too embarrassing to tell him.' "You can talk to me, ok? I just wanna help." Squall said sitting up a little to put an arm around Zell's shoulders. They were both quiet a moment while Zell thought about it. "Okay," He finally said then sucked in some air and let it out slowly. "it's Seifer."

Squall looked at him questioningly before speaking. "Don't be afraid of him, you can fight just as good- even better than him if you try." "No, its not that." "Then what? I thought you were friends now." "We are or we were, I guess. Its more than that I- I think I like him, seriously." "Oh Zell." Squall sighed and took his arm off Zell sitting up all the way leaning against the stone wall, he crossed his arms over his chest and looked straight ahead. 'Why didn't I see this coming before?' He asked himself. "When I mean seriously I mean, I think I love him. I've had this crush since I first saw him before we even came here." Squall shook his head and Zell continued. "It was that picture in the newspaper, first time I saw him. I kept it all this time and seeing him in person just set me off more. I want him all of him. Not just in my mind but out loud for all eyes to see." He said throwing his arms up in the air.

"This can't happen Zell you can't just be in love with him like that." Squall said "But I am. He's all I think about lately, I just wanna be with him," Zell said staring at Squall who was now leaning forwards again with his face in his hands like Zell had been before. "Come on Squall, haven't you ever felt like this with anyone, haven't you ever been head over heels?" Zell stared at him hard. Squall suddenly lifted his head and had a different tone of voice. It was more annoyed and frustrated rather than disapointed. "Yes, I have and its not good for you. All it'll bring you is misery and disapointment. You'll think about that person constantly, wanting nothing to do with anything else that wasn't them, just to be tossed aside like yesterday's dinner."

Zell was shocked at what he was hearing but more so that Squall said the same thing he was thinking about Seifer when they were fighting in the ring. 'Guess I shouldn't tell him the rest of the story then. I knew this wouldn't be good.' Zell thought. "You have to forget about him as hard as it might be you have to. At least for now and focus on the game." Squall said more calmly now. "I'll try." Zell said sadly feeling defeated but not wanting to upset Squall anymore. He'd just have to face the fact that what he'd said was true. So far all his want for Seifer did was distract him and make him miserable. Squall could see it on Zell's face that he didn't want to stop loving Seifer and it hurt him more than Zell knew.

"I wish I could help you with this in a better way, but I don't know how to deal with it myself. I've been trying for a long time to get over Irvine but its harder than I thought it'd be. Because I know I still love him still need him." He said more to himself because it was quiet and distant sounding. "I thought you two were doing o.k?" Zell said questioningly. "I thought so too but I don't know now's just not the time for us to be together. Everything's just repeating itself." Zell sighed and rubbed a gloved hand across his hair. "I don't understand." He said and stood up. "I'm not sure I do either right now. We'll try and work it all out but now's not the time, not with the game coming up, all these feelings will do is get in the way and you don't want that right?" Zell shook his head. "Good. So you ready to go back out there and try again?" Squall asked standing beside Zell. "Yeah, sure." He patted Zell's back and left the room. 'Gods Seifer, why'd it have to be this way?' Zell thought staying behind. 'I just wanna be with you.'

Outside Squall was making his way back to the ring. 'Sorry Zell, I hope things could work out for you later for me too. I know exactly how you feel and I just don't want you going through what I am now.' He made it to the ring and leaned against the ropes supporting himself. 'Once I figure everything out I'll be with you again Irvine and we can start over minus the hassels of boxing distracting you- us, from what's important.' When he heard Zell approach he let go of the ropes and climbed in with the little blonde following.

....................................................... .....

I try but I can't seem to get myself to think of anything......
but you

The two continued practicing in the ring as others came and went. All the while thoughts that they both said they wouldn't think kept filling their minds. Being in the ring they'd fought in the other night, Zell couldn't help but remember Seifer and the way he fought. Looking beautiful with every movement and the clothes he wore and knowing what was underneath were enough to make Zell drool. He thought about being in the locker room after the fight and how they joked around with each other.

Your breath on my face your warm gentle kiss I taste the truth
I taste the truth

Squall was thinking about the night at the club when he and Irvine were out on the dance floor kissing. Then he remembered telling him that it was nothing that morning and how hurt Irvine looked afterwards. 'What was I thinking? How could I have done that. I am leading him on and the only reason we're not together is because of me. I know he loves me so why can't I just let him know how much I love him back?' He snapped out of it when Zell hit him in the face lightly. He looked across at the other boy and Zell waved with a small smile bouncing in front of him.

'I need to find a way to fix this but not now, I should still wait until after Friday. If its not too late by then' He thought then got back into the game they had going.

........................................................... .

After a few minutes in the ring they moved down to the floor and Squall watched Zell work on the large punching bag. He hit it feircely and harder everytime thinking about Seifer. Wanting to hurt him as much as he'd hurt him. Even though he knew he could never actually do it he had to do something to let go of his pain. All he could see were flashes of the night before and then Seifer telling him to forget about it.

'How could I let myself fall for him so easily? How could he push me away just like that?' He paused his punching thinking about how great things had been between them the day before. The game, the bar, the cliff outside of the city and-

"Zell? you in there?" Squall asked "Huh? oh yeah." Zell replied coming out of his mental. "Come on its obvious neither of us are focused on this right now. Lets go home." Zell nodded to agree and Squall helped Zell get his gloves off sicne his were already off. They left the empty arena and went home both of them still lost in thought of the love they couldn't figure out but knew they wanted to be with.

I wanna be with you if only for one night
to be the one who's in your arms who holds you tight
I wanna be with you there's nothing more to say
there's nothing else I want more than to feel this way
I wanna be with you...................

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Lyrics sample from Mandy Moore 'I Wanna Be With You' slow version. (love that song) Hope no one minds the short chapter. For the new readers this fic isn't new its at least a month old. I just had to remove it from this place and change the rating to what it should have been rated. Keep reading and reviewing please. -Linkin