Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ I LOVE YOU ❯ Possession ( Chapter 5 )

Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket or it's characters. It belongs to Takaya Nasuki. Nor do I own the lyrics to "Possession" they are property of Sarah McLachlan.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!! Your reviews, and e-mails have really made me happy. I also love that a couple of you get my little Sarah McLachlan/The Cure motif that I have been using. Thank goodness, I was worried. I get the feeling that this fic might go on for a while, and other bands will most likely be added. For the moment for the beach house scenes, these two just feel right.

I was also able to send the FBI men on their way, when I discovered that "I'll never tell…" was just a really nice fan, and not a killer. : ) (sigh of relief)

Also, a couple of new places: California (someone who lives on my side of the world) and Florida (unless you were trying to throw off the FBI). I hope I didn't leave any out… I stayed up late writing this, so my mind is a little numb… more forgetful then normal, which is really bad.

Well, I am sleepy now, so no more of my silly talk for now. Enjoy, and let me know what you think.

I LOVE YOU

Chapter Five: Possession

*

Listen as the wind blows
from across the great divide,
Voices trapped in yearning,
memories trapped in time,
The night is my companion
and solitude my guide,
Would I spend forever here
and not be satisfied,

And I would be the one
to hold you down,
kiss you so hard,
I'll take your breath away
and after I'd wipe away the tears,
Just close your eyes dear

*

The way that she tasted, so much better than I could have imagined, was mesmerizing me. My hands found the softness of her waist, and wrapped around it. Pulling her closer, while being careful to keep my distance. Her lips were parted invitingly, but I hesitated. 'I should take this slow.' I told myself, but my tongue refused to listen, it was yearning for her. It pressed into her, grazing through honeyed lips and perfect teeth to find its home.

But she cringed! In my hands her body grew tense. Her mouth became cold and unwelcoming. It was as if she desired to spit me away. Had I done something wrong? Had I offended her?

"I'm sorry, Miss Honda. I should have asked you first."

"I can't Yuki. I'm so very sorry, but I can't. I just can't be with you like that." I searched her face for answers, and what I saw crushed me. The look in her eyes was undeniably disgust. Was my kiss so distasteful to her? 'Of course it was, a human who turns into a rat. I'm a freak, why would anyone want to kiss someone like me?'

"Yuki… I…"

"No… Miss Honda, really, it is quite all right. You don't need to explain yourself. I understand perfectly." I had to escape her, now, right now, before she started lying again. Akito was right; it was just as he had always said. No normal girl could ever love someone like me.

Miss Honda grabbed my hand, but I would have none of that. I didn't need her pity. I would rather have her hate me than allow her to pity me. I slapped her hand away. I ran from her, away from that room, and out the front door. I didn't bother with a jacket. I didn't even stop to tie my shoelaces. It was pouring out, but I really didn't care. All that I wanted was to put some distance between us. I had to get as far from her as possible. I was afraid of what I might say if I remained in her presence.

The pain was obscuring my logic; it was making me angry with her. I didn't want that. I didn't want to feel badly towards her. So what if she didn't care for me. Could anyone really blame her for that? Most of the time I didn't even care for myself. Even if she was completely incapable of loving me, Miss Honda was still my friend. She was, in fact, my best friend, maybe my only friend. I was foolish to expect anything more.

I ran along the shore until I was completely out of breath, and then I dropped to my knees upon the wet sand. Living in Sohma house I had learned that tears were not an appropriate emotion in a male. If I cried when Akito beat me, it only made it worse.

"Stop that, Yuki. Stop crying. Even a dirty little rat shouldn't cry."

The more that I cried the harder that Akito hit me, so I trained myself to control it. I learned that it was simply best to keep my feelings hidden. I didn't laugh, I didn't cry, and up until recently I didn't smile.

Now, however, my restraint had apparently vanished. Something inside of me was ripped wide-open, and all those years of pain were suddenly set free. Warm tears were running down my face, and I couldn't make them stop. I sat on the deserted beach, clutching handfuls of cold drenched earth, and I entirely came undone.

I cried forever, a silly rat wallowing in a puddle of self-hatred and self-pity. When I heard her footsteps racing towards me I tried to make myself smaller, so that she might pass me by. I didn't want her to see me like this. 'Even a rat shouldn't cry.' Of course, it didn't work. She stood behind me, I could hear her struggling to catch her breath, had she ran all the way here? Why bother, Miss Honda?

"Yuki, what are you doing? Come back to the beach house. You shouldn't be out here like this. You'll make yourself sick again."

I couldn't look at her. I didn't even know what to say to her. So I ignored her. I sat there, my hands wrapped around my legs, my face hiding against my knees.

"Yuki, please." Her hands tugged at my arm, trying to make me stand. I could tell from her voice that she was crying. "If you come back to the house, we can talk. We really need to talk."

"Go away, Miss Honda." I mumbled. "I want to be alone."

"Fine then. I'll let you be alone if that is what you really want, but you have to come inside. Please Yuki, I don't want to leave you out here like this."

I wouldn't budge. What did it matter if I got sick? Maybe if I were lucky I would get sick enough to die. Perhaps in death this horrible pain, this terrible loneliness, these stupid tears would cease.

"Yuki, I'm am very sorry for this, but you're leaving me no choice." Her voice was so stubborn that it made me look up. 'What exactly did she mean?' I wondered as her arms wrapped around me from behind, and Pop, she transformed me.

"Miss Honda! How could you?" I yelled at her as she scooped me up into her warm hands and cuddled me to her chest. "Put me down!" I demanded. Disregarding my wishes, she started running towards the beach house holding me carefully against the wet fabric of my favorite white dress. The rain had washed the stain away I noticed vaguely, before remembering that I was angry and yelling at her again. "I said put me down! Miss Honda! Put me down, right now!"

"NO!" She yelled back. "Yuki, I am sorry that I transformed you. I know that you probably hate me for it, but I couldn't let you just sit out there in the rain and catch a cold."

Slowing to a walk she held out her hand so that she could look at me. She was completely soaked; her white dress was now as transparent as the fabric she had worn earlier. Her eyes were red rimmed and swollen from crying, and her hair was sticking to her face. She was a mess; she was completely disheveled, and I of course found this unbearably appealing. It made me want her even more, which really pissed me off. Using every ounce of energy that I possessed, I willed myself to transform back. I knew that it was impossible. Never in my life had I ever been able to control the curse. It was what it was. The curse ruled me. I certainly didn't rule the curse. Regardless, I was furious at her. 'How dare Miss Honda use my curse to manipulate me?' I closed my eyes, and held my breath. Concentrating, I focused all my thoughts into becoming a man.

POOF!

My transformation knocked Miss Honda to the ground. Since she was holding me in her hand when it happened I ended up on top of her. I was wet and naked and sitting right in Miss Honda's lap.

"Yuki!" She blurted out awkwardly, and averted her eyes.

I started to scoot out of her lap, trying to escape, before she could transform me again.

"Wait!" She insisted forcefully, and grabbed my shoulders to hold me down. "Please, Yuki. Please, don't run away again. I'm so sorry that I hurt you."

I was making her cry, which made me feel guilty. It was obvious that this was causing her pain, and I couldn't understand it. She didn't make any sense, none at all. Why was she doing all of this? If she didn't care for me, why wouldn't she just let me go? She was the one who was rejecting me, so why did I feel as if she was the one who was actually being hurt by all of this?

"Yuki… Please." She whimpered, her eyes wide, and pleading. Her hands ran absentmindedly from my shoulders to my chest, before she self-consciously pulled them back. "It's not you. Please, won't you let me explain?"

In a warm flash, I came to my senses, my anger immediately melting away. A swirling fog of emotions, love, sorrow, fear and desire replaced it. I was sitting in her lap on the beach in the rain, and I was completely naked. She wore only a tiny white dress, which was soaked clear through. I wanted her; it was agonizing how much I wanted her. I might be nice, and I might be naïve, but there is a limit to how much any man can take, and it was at that moment that I found mine.

*
Through this world I've stumbled
so many times betrayed,
Trying to find an honest word,
to find the truth enslaved,
Oh you speak to me in riddles and
you speak to me in rhymes
My body aches to breathe your breath,
your words keep me alive,

And I would be the one
to hold you down,
kiss you so hard,
I'll take your breath away
and after I'd wipe away the tears,
Just close your eyes dear

*

"Explain." I calmly requested. I took her face into my right hand, locking her eyes to mine, while my left hand pushed her hair back out of her face.

"Yuki…" She said, obviously distracted, as I meant her to be.

"Yes?" Smiling innocently, I ran one finger teasingly along her throat. I leaned forward to place a tiny kiss on one of her exposed shoulders, and slowly kissed my way up her neck to her ear.

"I'm listening, Miss Honda." I whispered in her ear, before softly licking it. "What is it that you need to explain to me?"

"I love you." She mumbled through her tears. "I love you so much, Yuki."

Finding her lips I kissed her feverishly, my tongue pushing its way inside to find and wrap around her own. My hands found their way up into her dress to fondle and caress the silky skin of her stomach. I kissed her this way, possessively, lovingly, until it was necessary for us to come up for air. I stared into her eyes, breathing deeply. She shivered against my hands.

"You're cold, Miss Honda?" I realized foolishly.

"Yes, I'm cold, but I'm more worried about you. Is it all right if we go inside now? Please Yuki?" She begged, her eyes once again filling with tears.

"Okay." I agreed. Standing I pulled her to her feet. My clothes were soaked through, but the beach house was very close. I pulled on my wet pants, but didn't bother with my shirt. Neither of us spoke for the rest of the way home.

*
Into this night I wander,
it's morning that I dread,
Another day of knowing of
the path I fear to tread,
Oh into the sea of waking dreams
I follow without pride,
Nothing stands between us here
and I won't be denied,

And I would be the one
to hold you down,
kiss you so hard,
I'll take your breath away
and after I'd wipe away the tears,
Just close your eyes dear...

*

Chapter 5 over, chapter 6 to come, soon I promise.

Also, for those who are reading Nectar as well, I have a chapter written, but need to do a rewrite; I will try to have it up sometime this weekend. Thank you for being patient. You are all too good to me!!!!

YTR