Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ Punishment ❯ A Safe Place, A Haven ( Chapter 5 )

Punishment
Chapter 5: A Safe Place, A Haven

        The walls of Tohru's room were a light pink colour, but the atmosphere inside the room was quite different. Arisa was standing on a small stepladder in front of Tohru's shelves. One by one, she lifted the dainty ornaments from their place and handed them to Tohru, who in turn wrapped each ornamental figurine in protective wrap and placed it in the cardboard box in front of her. The room was quiet as they worked, neither girl saying no more than short phrases like, "should this one be packed seperately from the others?" Arisa coughed uncomfortably every once in a while, but she couldn't find the right words to say. Eventually, she ended up telling Tohru about one of the legends that she had heard in the Yankees about Kyoko as they worked at packing Tohru's belongings into the various boxes strewn across the room.

        Saki entered the apartment's foyer and buzzed a familiar button on the wall. Almost immediately she heard Arisa's voice on the intercom, and the main door before her unlocked. Saki pulled the heavy doors open and let herself inside. Tohru's apartment was located on the third floor. A small group of people were waiting in front of the elevator already, so she headed up the staircase at the end of the hall. After the strenuous journey, she found herself standing outside of Tohru's doorway.

        She felt anxiety building as she reached for the small doorbell. She was almost afraid to face Tohru; it would mean that everything would be confirmed, and she would know for certain that she wasn't living in some sort of twisted dream. The door opened slowly and Tohru appeared in the doorway.

       "Hana-chan, come in, come in!" Tohru smiled a little and stepped back to allow Saki entry. She followed her to Tohru's bedroom where they joined Arisa. "Uo-chan has been helping me pack up my things."

       "Oh? You're leaving here so soon?" Saki was a little surprised by that, she thought she might want to stay near her memories a little longer. The rent had already been paid for the month, so she could have stayed longer if she desired.

       "Yeah," Tohru said sadly as she wrapped a particularly beautiful unicorn figurine made out of brass. Engraved on its side were Tohru's initials; she had received it on her fourth birthday from her late father. She held it in her hands for a few minutes before placing alongside the others. "I spoke to Shi - Grandfather at the hospital, and he said that he would love to have me living with him, my aunt and my cousins." She gave them both a nervous smile. "I thought it would be best to settle in sooner than later; mom always says - ano - said that I shouldn't put off what I can do today!"

        Arisa seemed to be watching Tohru conscientiously from her high perch on the stepladder, but said nothing.

       "Un," Saki said awkwardly as she sat on the edge of Tohru's bed. She realized she was still holding onto the lily. "Tohru-kun, I got you a little something. It's not much but," she trailed off as she handed Tohru the flower.

       "It's beautiful, I love it!" Tohru beamed, ran off to the kitchen and returned with a glass of water holding the flower. "Thank you so much," she said as she placed it alongside a framed photo on her almost-cleared dresser. To stop the ribbons from getting wet, she untied them from the stem and circled them around the outside of the glass.

        Saki found her smile somewhat worrisome. She did not think that she would have been able to smile so soon after the death of someone so close. It pained her to see Tohru hidden under that outer shell; she could still feel the sense of loss radiating from her. She couldn't hide those.

        Tohru had become behind on wrapping because of the fuss over the flower, so Saki took her place in front of them and started on the small pile of ornaments Arisa had arranged on the floor. Tohru settled in front of her closet and started folding her clothes into neat piles in her suitcase.

        They circled around the rooms in the small apartment, packing things they thought Tohru would need at her grandfather's into the boxes. They ended up having to call on a neighbour to borrow one additional box. After the entire day of packing, they managed to pack up a substantial amount of items. Tohru assured them that her aunt would be able to drive her home to pick up things like furniture to put them into storage.

       "It's getting late, isn't it?" Tohru asked, glancing outside one of the bare windows in her room past the small pile of boxes. The darkness of twilight was already settling in.

       "I guess so," Arisa agreed, following her gaze. "Do you want someone to keep you company tonight? I can stay over if you want."

        Saki nodded. "Yes, I can stay as well."

       "But Uo-chan, Hana-chan! Tomorrow's Monday, you have school! I wouldn't want to you to be detained from it!"

       "Eh, that doesn't matter," Arisa said, waving those thoughts away with her hand. "This is much more important! Unless you just don't want us to stay with you," she trailed off for effect.

        Instantly, Tohru protested, "Of course I would love for you both to stay with me, but I just don't want to bother - "

       "Then it's settled, we'll stay, at least until morning," Saki smiled as she spoke.

       * * * * *

If fate holds a purpose, I feel fate will lend a hand.

If saves face deserts you, it deals grace from underhand.

       * * * * *

        Tohru was stubborn sometimes. For the most part, she accepts everyone's words for what that are and will follow what they say. But on that day, she had held her ground. Morning had arrived, and the three girls were sitting at the table attempting to eat the perishable contents of the kitchen. It was tough, but it had to be done. Tohru always felt awful about wasting food, so she was making sure that they got the most out of it. There wouldn't be enough room at her grandfather's house, she told them.

        Tohru was the first to notice the time as they finished clearing their plates. She kept on glancing up at the clock every few minutes. It almost seemed like she wanted to be alone. "It's almost time for school," she announced finally. "It's a bit of a longer walk from here, so it'd be best to leave soon. I'm sorry I couldn't have you stay longer, I've got to get to Grandfather's house."

        Arisa studied Tohru from her chair for several seconds, then stood up and carried her dishes to the sink. "I guess we should get going. I think I have another test today."

       "One day, do you think we could drop by your grandfather's house, Tohru-kun?" Saki asked.

        Tohru seemed to think about the question before replying in an uncertain voice, "I suppose that would be alright, but not until after everything is settled."

        This answer satisfied both Saki and Arisa for the time being. Both girls couldn't help thinking that her actions were a little uncharacteristic of her. But then, of course, she had been through a lot. They couldn't expect her to remain exactly the same throughout everything life sent their way.

       * * * * *

Can they stop my soul from breaking? Please, love.

I can't say I'm hurting, but my soul is breaking. Reach out and save me.

       * * * * *

        Days after the funeral had been held, Tohru visited Kyoko's grave side. She felt so far away from everything, rereading the words cast in the stone before her. It brought back everything, all the memories that she had carried with her from a child.

        She could remember another grave yard visit that pained her. She had stood next to her mother, holding onto her hand. Her mother had smiled down at her with a sort of melancholy expression staying on her face. She spoke in slow fanciful fragments, telling wonderful stories about her father. The stories eventually stopped, and she knelt down to look levelly at Tohru in the face. "It's okay to cry, if you want to, Tohru-chan. You can do things your own way, alright?"

        Tohru had smiled up at her mother and shook her head. She wouldn't cry, at least not in front of her mother. She would cry once she would be alone, she didn't want her mother to become emotional because of her own tears. Her eyes were moist, and Kyoko could see the tears being held back.

        And now, kneeling where her strong yet fragile mother was burried, she tried to find her resolve. Mother...Father...You are together now, at last. Be happy, please, and watch down over me. I want to make everyone happy, and I will work twice as hard to fill your void. Don't worry, I'll be okay in my new home.

        In the front pocket of her skirt, she carried two slips of paper. One, a short list of groceries she had been sent out to purchase: eggs, milk, leeks and potatoes. She had been on her way to the store, but she couldn't pass the graveyard without a visit to her mother. The other paper was a small newspaper clipping about the accident, something that she could still not read all the way through. She would always feel on the verge of tears upon reading it, but she kept it with her, hoping one day she'd be able to read it. She couldn't read past the sentence in the text that stated Kyoko had died when her car was struck by a certain car. The other driver's name was not mentioned, only a line that explained that the name of the person was being withheld for protection reasons. She would never be able to contact that person, she wouldn't be able to ask what went wrong, why her mother had been apart of that accident.

        She felt foolish, standing there wondering about that person. Had they been in an emergency situation? Had they been dodging a cat that had stepped out into the road? Did they simply not see the refulgent red light at the intersection? Or could it even have been something awful, too horrible to print in the papers? Had the driver had a drink or two that day?

       'Why?' was the biggest question on her mind. But not once did she lay the blame on that person. She couldn't for she didn't know the circumstances. A part of her nagged, wondering why the information was being withheld from her and the community. What had happened?

        She clasped her hands together in front of her chest, praying. Goodbye, Mother, be safe in heaven.

       "Hey, Tohru!"

       "Tohru-kun!"

         Tohru turned around in surprise at the sound of those familiar voices. "Uo-chan? Hana-chan? What are you doing here?"

        It was true, both girls were hurrying over to where Tohru was kneeling. She rushed to her feet, wiping the tears that had collected at her eyelashes away.

       "I thought you would be here," Saki said at last.

       "Alright, alright. I was wrong to doubt your senses," Arisa grumbled a little, trying to lighten the atmosphere. "Are you okay, Tohru?"

       "Of course I am!" Tohru assured them. "I was just surprised, that's all. Ah!" She suddenly remembered the grocery list still in her pocket. "I promised to get the groceries and I got distracted!" she babbled as she stared at the list. "I need to do this, or why else should I be able to live there? Oh Mother, I'm failing them!" Her mouth was running a mile a minute, leaving Arisa and Saki slightly confused.

       "Ano, Tohru-kun," Saki interrupted gently. Tohru stopped talking then and there. "Would you like us to accompany you to the store?"

       "You couldn't, it would be too much! This is my responsibility as a member of the household, I must do it alone!"

       "Hey, your grandfather isn't forcing you to do all the chores is he?" Arisa interrogated, raising an eyebrow. "It sounds like you've got a lot on your plate here."

       "No, no, that's not it!" Tohru shook her head wildly, pressing on. "That's not it at all! That is, that is... it's just that I really want to be worth my keep so I offered to help out with the shopping, the dishes and cooking and things. They're not forcing me, really!"

       "I would really like to visit your new home, Tohru-kun," Saki stated. "We must see if this is a suitable home for you to live in."

       "Hana-chan! Ano, that won't be necessary. Besides, I can't have guests over right now. G-grandpa is getting older, you know. I think he's becoming senile, he thinks that I am my mother. I'm sure that he'd be even more confused if guests came over. Maybe another day when everyone else is out of the house." She laughed nervously and waved her list in front of them. "I must go pick up these items, I'll be back at school in a few days after I'm settled! See you!"

        Arisa's mouth hung open as Tohru ran down the pathway away from them quickly as they both stood and watched. "Suspicious," Saki noted.

       "Yeah, tell me about it," Arisa agreed, scratching her head in puzzlement.

       * * * * *

I can't stand the distance, I can't stand to not be afraid.

I can't show resistance, I can't seem to run away.

Because every time the past awakens, my soul starts breaking.

       * * * * *

        It was an idle few days. Not having Tohru around in class made everything seem so much quieter, even if she was awfully shy in the classroom. Everyday they would enter homeroom expecting to see the smiling Tohru back and ready for school, but Tohru's seat remained vacant. The days passed uneventfully, little out of the ordinary besides Tohru's absence.

        On one of those almost indistinguishable days, a new student joined the class, Sohma Kyou. Saki found it a little strange that the ill-tempered, orange-haired boy had been accepted into Kaibara high so close to the end of the year - it would be just a little while longer before their final exams would begin. She paid little mind to the newest addition to their class, unlike the fan club girls. He was apparently related to the Prince, so they were highly interested in him.

        Finally, the day came when Tohru would rejoin their class. Saki walked into class with Arisa, expecting to see her sitting in her seat waiting for them to arrive. She would wave for them to join her, and Saki and Arisa would sit down around her desk. They would share interesting news with each other, then Tohru would smile and laugh at one of Arisa's jokes. That would happen for sure, just like old times.

        But it didn't happen as smoothly as Saki had pictured. No, not at all. She looked around the classroom, which was still quite vacant. She sighed as she sat in her assigned seat, rapping her dark nails along the side of the desk.

        Tap, tap, tap, tap. Tap, tap, tap, tap. Her fingers stopped their movements when she heard Tohru's familiar voice getting closer. "...I know that you're upset right now, but starting a fight just isn't a good idea! Not at school, you'll get in trouble for sure!" She must have been in the hallway, just out of Saki's line of vision.

       "Yeah, yeah, but he just pisses me off," another voice, this one was male and sounded gruff.

       "Maybe you should have a debate and court hearing, like those ones on TV! That would be a better way to work out your problems with Yuki-kun!" she suggested, the idea flowing out of her mouth quickly. "Definitely! With a mediator, a judge and a jury...you could hold a conference type of thing! You could invite the others - Momiji-kun, Hatsuharu-san and maybe even Kisa-chan and Hiro-san if they had the time - to be a part of the jury. I could even prepare snacks! Maybe some crackers with all sorts of different toppings, like salmon and - "

       "Where the hell do you come up with this stuff?" he said, sounding more angry than before. "And why would I want them on the jury, when they're part of the reason I'm not accepted in the family in the first place? You don't think these things through before you say stuff, do you?"

       "I'm sorry!" she said instantly, her voice dropping to a slightly dejected tone. "I guess it is a pretty silly idea...I just thought it would help."

        There was a lull in their conversation, but then an awkward sounding phrase, "You know, those snacks did sound kind of appetizing though."

        Was that his form of an apology? Saki wasn't sure. She felt like standing up to find out who this young man was, for she had never really noticed Tohru talking so casually to many of the other boys in the class. Usually only when it related to schoolwork. She remained in her seat; Tohru would come in when she was ready to. People were entering the classroom, their footsteps making it harder to hear. Saki was straining a little to listen, and she realized that she shouldn't be blatantly eavesdropping like this. It's part of the promise I made with her mother, she excused herself, but was it her curiosity?

       "Really? Well, I will make some just for you when I get home, as long as you don't get into a fight with Yuki today!" she said with a laugh as she entered the classroom doorway with the fiery Kyou alongside her, his hands shoved in his pockets.

       "Tohru, you shouldn't waste your time on him like that," Yuki's voice interjected, speaking more to get a rise out of Kyou than to scold Tohru. He entered the class a few steps behind her, so she turned around to face him. "I can help you study for your makeup test after school today."

       "It's no trouble at all, Yuki-kun! I'll make some for you too, if you'd like, in exchange for helping me study!"

        She waved as she left them both at the doorway, and she sat down at her seat. She waved to both of her friends from her position in the class - homeroom was about to begin.

        It was hard to get a chance to talk to her all day - her time was taken by the two boys who remained by her side. It was difficult to understand, Yuki had never really talked to Tohru all that much, but then again, had Saki just not noticed? She could remember unexplainable occasions where they had spoken with some sort of hidden meaning behind her words.

        By the end of the day, Tohru had still not had a good conversation other than of the greeting calibre. Tohru left school right away at the end of the day, but she promised she would write them both letters during her breaks at work to give them the next morning. She waved goodbye to them, walking in the opposite direction of the way the three normally walked together - with that new boy, Kyou. They couldn't fathom how Tohru could have ever gotten so close to him so suddenly, and she already was calling him 'Kyou-kun'.

        Was she missing something? There were so many mysteries in the world, Saki realized. Unconsciously, she nudged a small, flat stone with the toe of her boot out of its normal position in the lush, green grass. The pebble had been hiding nothing; the combination of earth and grass that had been underneath it was identical to the surrounding area. She sighed. What was going on out of her sight with Tohru?

       "What the hell is up with her today?" Arisa said crankily, both hands stuffed in her pockets as soon as she and Saki were away from the school. She got no response - Saki was thinking.

       "I think there's something going on out of our vision," Saki finally announced.

        Arisa nodded, looking up at the sky for a few seconds as if the clouds held the answers to their questions. "Yeah. I really want to visit her grandfather, I haven't seen him in years. I still remember where it is, kind of. If we walk to the neighbourhood he lives in, I'm sure I can recognize the house."

       * * * * *

In the face of the fire, I see angels conspire.

Will they head my desires?

Will they stop my soul breaking?

Could they stop my soul breaking?

Please, love.

       * * * * *

        The house stood before them, a part of a large neighbourhood. To their surprise, the yard was not vacant. Two pickup trucks were parked in the driveway, both loaded up with planks of wood, tools and other supplies. A dark blue tarp was attached to a portion of the house as several workers toiled under it, shielded from the sun. Arisa looked up at the house's physical state in surprise; she had visited the home once before, but it looked so different than she remembered. Saki thought they must have arrived at the wrong place, but the name 'Honda' etched into the side of the mailbox.

       "This is it, but it looks like they're getting some remodelling done on their house or something." Arisa said, walking around in the dusty grass.

       "Tohru-kun didn't mention that her grandfather's house is getting an extension built." Saki wondered what was going on.

        Arisa walked over to a man wearing a baseball cap who carried a clipboard. He just so happened to be critiquing one of the workers who was being particularly lazy, so she assumed that he was running the show. "Hey you! Question." she called loudly after he was done ranting. Saki followed her at a slower pace behind.

        He seemed surprised as he saw the pair of strange girls walking towards him. "Uh, yeah?"

        Arisa got straight to the point. "Do you know where the people who live here are staying? We need to see them." As an afterthought, she added, "It's an emergency."

        He eyed them for a few seconds. They had certainly walked calmly for being in an emergency situation. They're just kids, he thought as he noticed their school uniforms, so they be looking for a friend or something. Nothing serious. "I don't know specifically, but I think that old man said something about staying at a relative's house."

        Arisa sighed, but thanked him anyways. "Great, now we've got to do some detective work."

       "A phone directory would help in this case," Saki pointed out. "Her grandfather is on her father's side of the family, is he not? Hopefully that means their relatives would be listed under 'Honda.' Unless... is Tohru's aunt her grandfather's child, or did she marry into the Honda family?"

       "I have no idea, let's just hope they're listed."

        They headed to the nearest convenience store and looked for a phonebooth. Arisa flipped through the pages of the thick phonebook and scanned the names. "Hani.... Haruka....Hideki...Honaku...aha! There, Honda!" She glanced down the list and saw three people with the name Honda; Honda K, Honda M, and Honda O. Beside 'Honda K' was the address to Tohru's apartment, and beside 'Honda O' was the address that they believed Tohru's grandfather lived at. That only left 'Honda M' as Tohru's aunt. "Onward!"

       * * * * *

she won't say she's hurting,

she still dreams in the undertow

a safe place, a haven

a kind face just to overthrow

every time the past's awakened,

every time her soul starts breaking.

       * * * * *

       "Why would she be here?" a female girl who answered the door asked in disgust. "There's no way she would stay here, you know. You can't keep my cousin on such a short leash. She's out living with some men out in the middle of the forest, living it up... or didn't she tell you?"

       "What?!" Arisa exploded.

        The girl plowed on. "You can tell she's her mother's daughter, such a reckless, unthinking girl! You'd be best not to associate yourself with such low people."

       "You can't know who you're talking about! Tohru's not like that!" Arisa's fists were clenched at her sides; not only was she insulting Tohru, but also the honour of a woman who wasn't even alive to defend herself! It was despicable, and Arisa could feel the urge to teach that girl a lesson rising.

       "Arisa," Saki whispered, setting her hand on the Yankee's forearm. "Don't. Tohru wouldn't want that."

       "I guess not, but..." Arisa gritted her teeth and turned away from the girl standing in the doorway. She stalked off the porch, down the driveway and past a large hedge, Saki trailing not far behind.

       "Do you think she was lying?"

       "I don't know what to think anymore," Arisa said with a sigh.

Author Notes: Chapter 5; Completed September 22nd 2003, Revised and Uploaded September 23rd 2003.
Oh my. That's got to be the worst period of non-updates so far. Hopefully it won't happen again. I just *couldn't* come up for a way to get Kyou in there, because I need him for what I've got planned next, but I limited myself timewise. Ack.
Anyways, I really want to thank you all for your wonderful reviews and your patiences! Thanks everyone for reading, I hope you enjoyed this!
* * * * * Altered Excerpts from "Soulbreaking" by The Tea Party; Fruits Basket characters to N.T. at Hana to Yume Comics