Fushigi Yuugi Fan Fiction ❯ Man! I feel like a woman! ❯ Chapter 1

I am always asked, "Melyn, you are so evil and cruel. I bet you can't get any worse." That is when I laugh and then come up with something like this. Yes, I am pure evil and I am also sick! But, damn I have fun being evil and sick.

Now, I don't remember how I came up with this idea. I was cleaning my room out and in a stack of unfinished fanfics lay this beauty. I started it a while back and it somehow was placed in my 'Gee-where-am-I-going-with-this?' pile. I re-read the one chapter I wrote and decided late at night, why not post it? What harm could it do? I have no credibility. People already think I'm nuts. So here it is.

I forgot to mention. I am bad. I am not going along with what the series did. Oh well. I'm not the first author to do such horrid things...or am I?

******

Man! I feel like a woman!

******

Far off in the distance a figure loomed in the shadows. She cackled as she watched two different pair of senchi in two different parts of the world. One, was to the south. The other was to the east.

The one's in the southern most region sat around a table and fought over dinner portions. The only female of the group of eight looked as if she had her fair share, but she still fought. The group in the south, however, looked like a solemn group. Two woman and six men sat around a table. They listened to the blond man who sat at the head of the table and talked.

'Don't these people do anything different?' The woman sighed. Both groups were very uneventful. She needed something new to happen. Something to brighten her day. Something--

The woman smiled. It was so simple. Why didn't she think of it before? "They won't be boring for long!" The woman cackled as her eye's burned with mischief.

******

Tasuki groaned and arched his back like a cat. Mornings had to come so damn early. Sleep was much nicer than consciousness. The bandit debated going back into peaceful slumber, but soon realized food was much better than sleep. Besides, after he ate he could always go back to sleep. It wasn't like there was anything important he had to do.

His hand reached down with his morning ritual of scratching himself and found some vital parts, well...missing.

"What da-?!" Tasuki bolted upright and looked down. He found that the parts in question were really missing and, as a compensation, he had a well endowed female bust.

Tasuki jumped out of bed swearing up a storm. He ran to the floor length mirror in his room He wore the white shirt he fell asleep in the night before. Now it didn't fit him as well as it did. The shirt hung off of one of his slender shoulders and reached down to his knees. He could tell he was a great deal shorter. Through the shirt he could see his waist and shapely hips. His legs were much thinner.

His features were not as hard anymore. His face seemed rounder and his eyes larger.

"Oh Suzaku! I'm a woman!" Tasuki screamed and pulled on his pant, which were now far too big for his...her small waist. She found a piece of disregarded fabric and made a make-shift belt. "I'm gonna murder who ever did this to me!" She burst threw her door and bolted down the hallway.

"Calm down, no da!" A sweet high voice rang out. Tasuki stopped and turned to see Chichiri standing next to a doorway he just passed.

"Geez, Chichiri! You're a woman too!" Tasuki looked over his fellow seishi. Chichiri too, was shorter then he was when he was not a she. She wore her normal garb, which looked oversized as well.

"We all are..." Chichiri noticed where Tasuki's gaze was held and blushed. "Perv." She growled and turned away.

"Aw, come on Chichiri!" Tasuki whined. "You look good!" She gave a fanged smile. "What about Miaka? Is she still a she?"

"Miaka turned into a man, no da."

Tasuki burst into laughter. He knew it was wrong to laugh at her miko, but the thought of a man with Miaka's hairstyle and Miaka's dress. She couldn't help herself.

The laughing stopped when a fist collided with Tasuki's face. "That isn't funny." Tamahome growled. He too was now definitely a she. "I bet the only one enjoying themselves here is Nuriko. He's wanted to be a woman forever." Tamahome sighed and cracked her knuckles.

"I know, no da." Chichiri sighed. "How long has he wanted to be a woman?"

Tamahome smiled. "I think he really wanted to be a woman when he first met the emperor...empress." Tamahome snickered at the thought of Hotohori as a woman.

*****

"Highness!" The advisor sent to the emperor reeled back in shock at the sight in front of him. "What happened to you, Sir?"

Hotohori sighed and rubbed her temples. "I don't know." She paced her quarters in an attempt to calm herself down. She was the EMPEROR for Suzaku's sake! She was a HE!! "I think I was cursed." This was really not good.

"Leave!" She heard Nuriko cry out. The servants left at once. Nuriko repeated himself to the advisor with a more stern voice. "Leave now! Don't you see the emperor wishes to be alone?"

Hotohori sighed in relief. Nuriko didn't change into a woman! "Leave me." She shooed away the advisor. After everyone left Hotohori smiled. "I see you didn't change."

"Actually..." Nuriko turned away.

Hotohori's heart sunk. Of course Nuriko didn't seen to change. He was already feminine, unlike the rest of the seishi. "This is not going to go over well." She sank into a chair. "What will happen if Kotu finds out?"

"Laugh?"

"This is no time for jokes." Hotohori glared.

"I'm serious! Nuriko moved in front of her empress. "If Nakago finds out and attacks I bet if we flash him, he will leave!" Nuriko tried to lighten the mood.

It didn't work. "Be serious!"

*****

Meanwhile in Kotu...

*****

"Nakago!" Yui ran own the hallways of the Kotu palace. She had awaken that morning to find herself a man. He was tall, lean and even he had to admit, he was quite a good looking man.

A small flat-chested blond woman stepped out from around the corner. She was a good foot shorter than Yui and she wore the Shogun's clothing. Thou, the cloths did not fit her at all. "Yui-sama."

Yui suppressed a laugh as he recognized who exactly this blond woman was. The once towering Nakago was now a small woman that looked almost frail.

"What's going on?" Yui demanded.

"I do not know, Yui-sama." Nakago answered. His voice was now a high soprano, instead of the deep bass it usually was.

"Yui-sama!" A woman with short dirty blond, almost green hair ran down the hallways. Behind her floated one of the senchi's weapon of choice.

"Suboshi?"

"Yui-sama! You a man!"

"I know." Yui grumbled.

Suboshi turned to the Shogun. "Uh...It seems as if all the seishi has turned into um...the opposite sex.." Suboshi blushed

Nakago growled and adjusted her armor. She really looked uncomfortable with her new figure.

"NAKAGO-SAMA!!!" A male Soi and a female Tomo ripped down the hallway and flung themselves at the general all the while biting and scratching at one another.

Both collided with Nakago at the same moment. If Nakago was his normal self, the collision would have no affect on him. But due to her small frame, all three crashed to the ground in a giant heap.

"Nakago! Oh Nakago! What happened?" Soi cried. She was usually calm and collected, but no one blamed his outrageous behavior.

"I'm a woman!" Tomo fell onto Nakago and cried. "Does this mean I am straight?" Tomo still wore his normal makeup, but now she was much smaller and not as scary as he normally was. In fact she was kind of cute.

"It's not that bad." Amiboshi smiled sweetly as she held her flute. "It could be much worse." She feared her existence as the rest of the Seiryuu senchi glared at her with red hot hatred. "I don't like it either, but it could be worse..."

*****

Oh boy...both senchi have now switched genders...Can it get weirder? Survey says, YES!!! Oh God yes!! I have rated this fanfiction R because of vulgar things I will not be talking about now. I figured I could do the same in a Ranma 1/2 fic, but this seemed like more fun here. ^.^ (grows little horns. Yes, They are women. And I will keep them women for Quite a few months. (Women reader should catch on...O.o) Again I am sick and Evil.

Disclaimer: I am sorry if this causes any personal or mental or physical damage to you. I truly wish you read the rating. I do not own Fushigi Yugi and will not take responsibility for any mental pain.