Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ And Now For Something Completely Insane ❯ The Middle ( Chapter 2 )

AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY INSANE!

Part 2: The Middle

Last time the boys had defeated just one of the Minstrels traps, what lies ahead for our hero's? Read and find out…

Ringo: **Still out of breath** well…I think a nap would do me a world of good…

John: **pant, pant** Yeah, really…**Plops himself down on a log behind him**

Duo: **lowers him gun** heh-…well…wasn't that fun?

Quatre: ummm…guys…where are we?

(They all turn to see what Quatre was talking about. As far as the eye could see, there was no ocean, no sand, only trees, and outback. They all agreed that they should stick together, just in case something more comes up as a trap. So, they continued to wander around the hot outback, untill…)

George: **trips over a camera mans legs, who is kneeling in the bushes** What in the bloody `ell!?

John: …you tripped over someone, twit…

Cameraman: you mind being quiet? I'm filming here!

(Wufei moves the bushes so he can see what the man was filming, it appeared to be an episode of 'Survivor'…the last one…)

Paul: that is pathetic!

John: I'll say…

Ringo: lets keep moving! Leave them alone!

(They continue walking and then hours later, they past a small oasis, and the camp for the survivor show…a short while later…)

Wufei: **from behind a very sweaty face** any know what time it is?

Duo: nearly 7 PM…

Paul: should we rest here?

John: yes, please…

Ringo: well, I'm spent…**Sits down on and old tree stump**

George: **yawns** sleep is good…

Ringo: yeah, really…**the log he's sitting on and the land around it begins cracking** what in the bloody 'ell… **listens closely** you here that mates? Sounds like something's under the GROUND!!!

(The land which Ringo was sitting on caved in bringing with it Ringo, who was still hanging on to part of a root to keep from falling any further. One reason being because the bottom consisted of water and sharks…)

Ringo: this is just not my day…

John: no duh, mate… **Kneels down and try's to grab Ringo's hand** you're too far down!

Duo: Have you got something to stand on?

Ringo: Yeah, I got one foot on a root or something!

Wufei: OK!

George: we gotta find something to get him out of there with!

Paul: well, duh, Geo…

John: ok, I guess all of us should look for something…

Quatre: ok! We'll split up!

Ringo: …**Cries** I want me mum!!

(They all split up in different directions, George, hurrying off in the direction they came, had a plan. He ran back to the camps they had past before, he hid in the bushes and saw the tribes from survivor having a tug of war. (Please don't flame me if they did have a tug of war in the show, it just had to happen…because…oh, you'll find out…) George then ran out of the bushes, grabbed the rope in between the two teams and said: 'TEAM BLUE WINS!' both the teams looked up in confusion, considering that there is no blue team. They let go of the rope and George ran off with it…)

(When George came back, everyone but him were there…)

Duo: George! Where did you get that!?

George: I have my ways…

Ringo: **Just as a shark bites for Ringo's leg::* WHA! GET ME OUT OF HERE!

John: We're coming Ring! C'mon Geo, tie a loop at one end!

George: OK, ok! Keep your pants on!…for all our sake…**Ties a loop at one end, then hand it to Paul, who is standing closest to the hole**

Paul: Ok, Ring! Here!

(Paul throws the rope down to Ringo, he puts one foot in the loop and the boys pull him to safety…right before a shark bit the root out of the wall, which Ringo was holding on to…)

Ringo: **faints**

Wufei: that was appropriate…

Quatre: yeah, really **falls asleep**

Everyone else: agreed…**they all go to sleep**

~Back at Minstrel HQ (or MHQ)~

Leader Minstrel: DAMN! How is this possible?! They demolish my dinosaur! They sink my pit! GRRR! My plans!!

Odd Job: sir, may I suggest--**hold up a small blue gold carving of a scarab**

LM: Yes, my little buggy friends may do the job…**pulls out the 'Book Of The Dead'.**

~Back at the boys' camp site the next morning at 7 AM~

Duo: **Yawns while eating turkey jerky** you know, what's the difference between Turkey jerky and beef jerky?

Wufei: BEEF JERKY IS STRONGER!

Duo: I mean…besides that…

Paul: I don't really think there is a difference, mate…

Duo: then how do they make turkey jerky?

John: It's really a simple process…

Ringo: oh, you know how to make turkey jerky??

John: Yes, as a matter of fact, I do!

George: …

John: see, what you do, is you take a really good piece of meat…and then a New York City cab driver sits on it for three months!

Paul: **laughs** heh-oh, really?

Duo: ^-^`! Good joke…

John: I'm serious…

Duo: …**puts down the jerky**

Wufei: let's get going before Duo gets sick…

Quatre: …**Whispers to John** is that how they really make it??

John: **Smiles evilly** Yes…

George: I guess I'll bring along this rope…you never know when Ringo's gonna fall in another hole!

Ringo: e-heh…

Paul: oh, boy…

~Later…~

(they somehow made it back to the beach, and to S's hut…)

S: did the guns do ok?

Duo: yeah!

Wufei: heh-fun…

S: I'm glad you like them, they are yours to keep!

All: YEAH!

S: and I have another gadget for you…a BMW V-8, the finest car on the market…**Pulls a sheet off of a VERY nice looking black car**

Paul: Cool beans!

S: this is no ordinary car, boys…this car is equipped with…a hell of a lot of stuff…just watch James Bond…

Duo: …you're really helpful…

S: Just push the various buttons and they will do various things!

Wufei: like what?

S: well, missiles may fly out, tranquilizers, machine gun, and a very high tech alarm system!

Ringo: Nice alarm system?

S: when the alarm system is on, the car cannot be damaged in any way shape or form…not even a bazooka could hurt this baby…and if anyone tries to open it they will be shocked with a wave of electric current!

John: convenient…

S: Oh! And I also made a special modification just for you! Just look in the trunk…

John: OK!

(John walks to the back of the car, touches the handle, and gets shocked…his hair standing on end…)

John: Ow… **flattens down hair** you did that on purpose!

S: oh, sorry…**Turns off alarm system**

John: …¬.¬``

(John opens the trunk and finds three brand new guitars each one embroidered in pure silver with the names John, Paul, and George…Johns for some reason had something in it…a pack of matches…)

S: sorry, my cat smokes…nasty habit…

John: Right…**puts the matches in his pocket**

George: and what's this? You put a can of gasoline in the trunk?

S: for when you run out of gas!

George: there isn't enough gas here to power a motorcycle around the outside of a penny! **holds up a can about the size of his own hand, then puts it in his pocket**

S: well, you never know…

(Then a new drum set for Ringo was visible. The drums had pure silver rims, and on the two side drums that stuck out it said Ringo Starr, with lots of stars around his name)

Ringo: That's bloody sweet! **picks up drumsticks**

John: **Smiles** thank you!

Paul: yeah! You remembered that I needed a left-handed guitar! ^-^!

George: I'm gonna copy John… **Smiles** thank you!

John: …o…k…

Duo: a man and his instrument…**sweat-drop**

Wufei: …it's a sad, sad day…

Quatre: it's isn't all that disgusting!

Wufei and Duo: ¬.¬``

Ringo: I'm so happy! **puts drumsticks back in trunk and closes it**

The Beatles: …………………………̷ 0;…………

Ringo: what?!

John: nothing, nothing!

S: oh, and I did make a few adjustments to the car other than weapons and gadgets like that…

Wufei: what did you do to it??

S: I gave it a removable roof! **opens the car door and pushes a button, the roof of the car vanishes**

Duo: ^-^! A convertible!!

All: -_-``

George: **Throws rope in the back of the car** well, lets go!!

John OK! I'll drive!

Duo: SHOT-

Paul: SHOTGUN!

Duo: damn it…

John: hey you got to drive it the whole time in the other series!

Duo: **cries** but I wanted to drive!

Wufei: no, you get stuck in traffic too easy…

Quatre: and you get lost easy, too!

Duo: **while trying to hold back his anger** ok…fine, I'll sit in the back…

S: you're lucky that those seats are wide enough! Four people can comfortably fit in the back and three in the front!

Paul: hmm…people reading this were getting scared we were going to put George in the trunk, weren't ya?

George: …why you…**Grumble, grumble…then gets in car**

(They all scramble for a moment trying to decide who would sit in the middle in the front, Wufei won the 'Paper, Rock, Scissors' game so he sat in the front then everyone else sat in the back…)

S: OK! **opens the hanger at the back of the hut**

John: He-he-he! **drives off onto the beach**

S: they are gonna get themselves killed…**Closes hanger and walks back to his lab shaking his head**

~A few hours later on the beach~

Duo: …you here that?

Paul: **listens closely in concern** Yeah…hey, John, stop the car.

John: -k-…**Stops the car and turns off the engine**

Wufei: what is that sound?

Quatre: …sounds like crickets…or some kind of bug…

George: …si…

Ringo: ……**looking into the woods** oh, bloody `ell…not again…

George: …it's some kind of black bug…

John: yeah…**Gets out of car** a damn big swarm of them!

(the rest of the boys get out of the car to get a better look)

John: just so the car will be safe…**puts alarm system on car**

Paul: yeah, worry about the car…forget about our safety…

Ringo: **Sweat-drop**

George: I'll get the rope! **Gets rope out of back seat**

Duo: Do you think Ringo's gonna fall in another hole??

George: I dunno, you never know when you might need a little rope…

Wufei: …

Quatre: they're getting closer!

Wufei: HEY! Wait a sec…I've seen this movie. The Chinese dude dies first!

Paul: Very funny…

John: actually, I've seen this movie…and those things are afraid of fire…

George: …**Looks at rope in deep thought, then gets an idea** Quick, guys, get in a circle with your backs to each other!

(Immediately, the boys get in a big circle, leaving a space for George. George then made a circle with the rope around them, pulled out the gasoline from his pocket, poured it all onto the rope, and then asked:)

George: John?? Do you still have those matches??

John: yeah! **Pulls out the matches and throws them to George**

George: OK! **Gets in the circle then lights a match and throws it at the rope**

(The rope bursts into flames just as the scarabs come herding out of the wood. They surround the fire that George made, and cannot penetrate it.)

Duo: **sweating from the heat** What…now genius?

George: I'm working on it…

(Suddenly the sky goes an aerie colour of black, the fire goes out and the scarabs turn into little blue gold carvings.)

Wufei: What in the world…

Paul: my thoughts exactly…**moves forward**

George: All my plans work out perfectly!

John: …well, I do admit you did save us, but you certainly didn't do that…**Points at the millions of scarabs frozen in blue gold**

George: sure I did! I just…I just………I dunno…

Ringo: well, let's get going…**Walks over to the car, touches the handle, and gets shocked by the security system** John…you mind, mate? **Flattens hair**

John: not my fault! I told you it was on!

Ringo: …oh, please, just turn it off…

Paul: stop that bitching you two…

John and Ringo: yes, master… **John turns off system and everyone gets in**

(They continue driving along the cost and everyone falls asleep…accept John…)

John: oh bloody `ell

~Back at MHQ~

LM: NOOO!!! NOT AGAIN! HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?!?!

Odd Job: I do not know, sir…**takes the 'Book Of The Dead' from the Leader Minstrel** the spell put on the scarabs is none-reversible, sir…I-I don't know how this could have happened!

LM: Oh, I have an idea of how it happened…and in the future…it will not happen…

Odd Job: sir?

LM: never mind…just I have a job for you Odd Job…

(Everything falls into a whisper between Odd Job and the Leader Minstrel.)

~The next morning at the boys' camp, somewhere on the outside of Brisbane, a city about 450mi north of Sydney (Sorry is I spelled it as 'Sidney' before…)~

(As they all walks towards a small bar)

John: **Talking to Duo** want any jerky? **smiles**

Duo: …no thanks…**backs away from it**

Wufei: **laughs**

Paul: you are very cruel, John…

John: Yes, I know…

Ringo: what do you suppose they have at that bar?

George: I dunno…

Quatre: food, one should hope…

Duo: …duh…but it's no Denny's diner…

(When they made it to the bar…)

John: **To the bar tender** I'll have a martini…shaken, not stirred…

Bar Tender: this early in the morning? Pal, are you sure? It could kill you!

John: my middle name is Danger…

Paul: **who has been listening in; looks over John's shoulder at the bar tender** actually, his middle name is Winston…

John: **Face turns red with anger** shut…up…James…

Paul: DON'T CALL ME THAT!

(for non-Beatles fans Paul's full name is James Paul McCartney and John's is John Winston Lennon…yikes…)

Bar Tender: …ok…fine…here's your martini, sir…oh, and the man down at the other end of the bar said that he would pay for it…

John: **Glasses slid down the bridge of his nose** really…**Looks down at the other end of the bar and sees a man (it is Odd Job…but John and the others don't know that…))**

John: hey, boys…get a loud of that guy…**nods down at him**

Ringo: he's got a nice hat…

George: **hits Ringo upside the head** twit…

Wufei: oi…what about him, John?

Duo: What? Do you think he poisoned you drink or something?

Paul: …**whispering to John** didn't he buy that drink for you?

John: yeah…

Quatre: **with his head in between Paul and John conversation** I wouldn't drink it…

John: …are you always this persistent?

Duo: yes…

Quatre: …-_-``

Paul: I wouldn't either though, John, if I were you…

John: ummm…Bar Tender? Could you take this back? I'll have some scrambled eggs instead!

BT: sure…**He takes the martini back to the back of the bar…the martini blows up, killing the Bar Tender…**

Duo: **looking over the bar to see what happened** maybe you should of gotten it stirred…

John: where's my scrambled eggs??

Paul: **Rolls eyes** C`mon, guys, there has to be a better place than this…

All: Ok…

(they walked out of the bar…Odd Job fellows…they walk over to the car and Odd Job stands outside the bar door)

Wufei: how do you suppose we get rid of him?

John: There has to be something on this car that can do the job…I just gotta find it! *Pushes a button**

(Suddenly a laser comes out of the top of the car and fires a laser beam up into the sky)

Odd Job: well that didn't work…**Pulls out a chair**

Ringo: what the bloody `ell?
Odd job: DIE YOU NINNIES! **Throws a bunch of chairs at them**

John: OH BLOODY `ELL! **Jumps behind car and puts the alarm system on**

(The rest of them get behind the car as well)

Paul: there's got to be something we could throw at him!

John: I'm working on it! **Pushing buttons randomly** they all do attacks from the front! **John pushes another button and a canon ball goes flying out of the tail pipe, hits Odd Job in the head and kills him**

Quatre: that's not a very pretty site…

Duo: …@.@ wow! COOL BEANS!

Wufei: damn it…and I was going to throw a pineapple at him…

All: …

(They all get in the car and they start driving to Sydney)

Paul: what are we gonna do?

Ringo: I don't know, but I want me mum!

John: all's I know is that we have to get to Sydney before something bad happens…

TO BE CONTINUED…

PLEASE R&R! ^-^!