Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Bleeding On the Inside ❯ Cruicify ( Chapter 5 )

Disclaimer: I own nothing except this story.

Warnings: Angst, rape, yaoi, and eventual 3x4/1x2 content.

>>>*<<<

CRUCIFY

Every finger in the room is pointing at me I wanna

spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could

bring I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a

desert in my mouth figures that my courage would

choose to sell out now I've been looking for a savior

in these dirty streets looking for a savior beneath

these dirty sheets I've been raising up my hands

drive another nail in just what god needs one more

victim why do we crucify ourselves every day I

crucify myself nothing I do is good enough for you

crucify myself every day and my heart is sick of

being in chains got a kick for a dog beggin' for love I

gotta have my suffering so that I can have my cross

I know a cat named Easter he says will you ever

learn you're just an empty cage girl if you kill the

bird I've been looking for a savior in these dirty

streets looking for a savior beneath these dirty

sheets I've been raising up my hands drive another

nail in got enough guilt to start my own religion

please be

save me

I cry

Tori Amos

>>>*<<<Bleeding On the Inside - Chapter 5 - Crucify

Duo lay beside Quatre and listened to the blond Arab's unsteady breathing. He knew the boy was not asleep, would not sleep until his body forced him to out of sheer exhaustion. He felt the silent tears that slowly soaked the sheets at his side and wanted to cry himself. But Duo did not cry. He hadn't cried since the day Solo had died, turning cold inside the circle of his arms…

Duo shivered and pulled the covers up higher, closing his eyes to give Quatre a sense of privacy in his sorrow. Such pain was manifest there. Such pain that had no relief of comfort in sight. So what if Quatre was still alive? Could this really be called living?

So what if they managed to get the guy put away…or better, kill the bastard? Did that make it all better? Take Quatre's pain away? Make it so it never happened?

Duo sighed and rubbed Quatre's back soothingly, pausing when he felt the boy tense under his touch.

Nothing could make this better except time. Quatre was strong. He would pull through eventually. Duo knew this but it didn't make it any easier to watch his suffering.

'I'm so sorry Quat. I'm sorry that I couldn't spare you this. I'm sorry I couldn't help you when you needed it. I couldn't help Solo when he needed it either. He was always the one who got me out of scrapes. I really am useless, just sitting around and being a nuisance all the time. I knew you wanted to go out today. I should have offered to go with you. I should have been there. I should have, would have, could have…'

Behind Duo's closed lids an image flashed, a memory lurking just below the surface. He flinched and opened his eyes but it didn't go away. Eventually he closed his eyes again, letting the memory come. He knew for a fact that it would not leave him alone now.'Solo…'

~ flashback ~

"Run faster Min!"

Feet pounded on pavement as two small figures ran through the dirty back roads of L2. They were young, the girl only five years old, the boy barely more than seven. Their small legs carried them through the ally-ways in a hasty shuffle that would have been comical if not for the danger that laced their actions. They didn't bother calling out for help. They knew that no one would oblige. The streets were hardly abandoned but the people who were there didn't look too interested in helping some ratty street-kids and the general attitude on L2 was not to get involved in things that didn't concern you. The children were on their own.

"Ow!"

The boy paused in his flight to turn and look back at the tiny girl, who was now sprawled on the ground, her ankle twisted painfully beneath her. The boy pushed his long, chestnut coloured hair out of the way and went over to help her up. She winced when he put her on her feet but didn't complain when he urged her to run again. She knew that there was no time to indulge in injury.

With the girl leaning heavily on the boy, the two continued their race through the streets, though not as fast as before. Behind them they could hear footsteps and vicious catcalls. They were close. Very close.

'We've gotta get away!' the boy thought frantically. 'I should have run for the shelter instead of out here in the middle of nowhere.'

But he knew that he couldn't risk leading them back to the others and Solo.

'Solo…where are you?'

"Look!"

The boy interrupted his musings to look around himself and saw what the girl saw. A dead end. A large pile of trash, dumped by the city officials conveniently blocked the ally-way. They were trapped.

"We'll have to climb over it."

"I can't!" the girl wailed, terrified.

The boy set her down and took a look at her ankle, noting the swelling that was already taking place.

She was right. There was no way that she would be able to climb that structure.

'Think, think!'

"There!" the boy pointed to a small hole in the rubble. "We can climb through there. It's not high up. You can make it Min c'mon, we can't stay here or they'll catch us."

The girl hesitated and looked back the way they came. In the distance they could hear the sounds of pursuit, feet pounding on pavement. She nodded.

"I'll help you."

The boy took her arm and helped her to her feet once more, supporting her on his side. They were almost to the hole when a voice exclaimed behind them, "There they are! They're trying to get away!"

Quickly, the boy shoved the girl through the hole, ignoring her cry of pain. He tried to follow but a strong hand had grabbed a section of his hair and it yanked back _hard_. Yelping, the boy spun around, clawing and scratching like a wild animal cornered. Finding the hand with his teeth, he bit down until he could taste blood. Whoever was holding him let go, screaming, and he disappeared through the hole, chestnut mane trailing after him.

"Quickly!" the boy motioned to the girl who was clutching him, sobbing.

"I thought they had you," she cried, burying her face in his chest.

"We don't have time for this," the boy growled as he caught up the girl in his arms and made his way down the ally. Behind him he could hear the thugs struggling to get through the hole that had been perfect for the children but far too tiny for a grown man. Cans and bottles spun around them, glass breaking as they pushed and shoved at the rubble.

The children fled down the street, only to be confronted with yet another dead end.

"Shit!"

The boy looked around, hoping to see a window, a fire escape…anything to get them out of this mess.

"There you are munchkins."

The boy spun around to find two men, dirty and reeking of alcohol, staring down on him. He set the girl down on her feet and stood in front of her protectively.

"Leave us alone!" he shouted hopelessly.

The closest man chuckled and kneeled down in front of him, reaching out a hand to trace the boy's cheek. The boy stood still, wanting to lash out but fearing for his companion's safety.

"Leave you alone?" the man drawled. "Now why would I want to do that? I've got an itch boy. And I need to scratch it real bad. You'll do just fine."

The other man stepped forward, his greasy hair hanging limp in his face.

"He is kinda pretty. Just look at those eyes, Hank. I ain't never seen purple eyes before. And that hair…he's almost like a girl." The greasy man leered at him and reached out to pinch his arm but the other man smacked his hand away.

"He's mine first. You go play with the little girl. You like them better anyways." The man ordered, not taking his eyes off the boy.

The greasy man pouted but he left the boy alone and turned his attention to the sobbing figure behind him.

"She's pretty too. C'mere little one. Want to sit in my lap pretty thing? If you're real good I'll give you some candy…" he reached out and grabbed her arm harshly. Shrieking, the girl was pulled into his embrace, her small fists having no effect on the big man.

The boy saw red. "Get your damn hands off of her!" he said, turning on the greasy man. But before he could do anything, the other man had his arms wrapped around his waist, pinning his arms to the side and pushing him to the ground. The boy struggled uselessly against the huge bulk that had settled itself on his back.

"Min!"

The girl screamed in the background, her cries piercing the boy's ears painfully. Somewhere in the back of his mind he heard the heavy metallic sound of a zipper being pulled down and a voice saying, "You're going to be so tight…"

Darkness invaded the boy's vision and he was just about to pass out when he heard another voice shout, "Stop."

The weight left his back but his arms were still pinned to his sides so he couldn't escape. His face twisted around on the pavement until he finally caught a glimpse of the person who had shouted.

He was young. Only thirteen by his looks. His hair was a rich golden colour and it would have shone brilliantly in the sun had it not been coated with a thick coat of dirt. His face and body was lean, evidence of starvation, and his golden-amber eyes glinted dangerously, as if he had seen horrors weaker men would have broken at.

"Solo!"

The greasy man paused in his stripping of the girl's clothing to look at the new arrival. "Go away kid, we're busy."

"You don't want to do this," the golden-haired boy said, stepping closer to the man who held the boy. He seemed amused by that comment.

"I don't? Why not pip-squeak."

"Because," Solo said, causally tossing his head, "its too much trouble for a quick lay. The girl's much too small. You won't get much out of her. Not enough to satisfy a man of your needs. And the boy will fight back. And he's strong enough to get in a few good hits. He's already drawn blood."

The man looked down at where the kid hand bitten him, blood seeping from the wound onto the ground. He looked back at Solo.

"That may be true but I want a fuck and they'll provide some entertainment, at least for a little while before we've broken our toys." The man grinned, sliding a meaty hand across the boy's buttocks. The boy squirmed, disgusted and trying not to vomit at the sick feeling inside his stomach.

Solo stepped closer still, ignoring the boy who called out to him pleadingly.

"Take me instead. I can give you guys a lot more pleasure then these two. They'd be useless after one fuck and I'm sure you don't play nicely with your "toys". I can take a lot more. I'd last you a couple hours at least. And I won't charge you for my services. All I want is for you to let them go freely. Deal?"

The man considered the golden-haired boy's words, eyeing his emaciated body lustfully.

"Maybe…"

The greasy man spoke up. "But Hank, he's only one and we got two here. I don't wanna wait my turn."

"It'd be well worth the wait," Solo said, letting his thin coat drift open to display the white skin of his stomach. "And wouldn't you rather have someone willing?"

"And all you want is for us to let the kids go?"

"Hank, purple eyes!"

"Shaddup, Marty. This kid's got pretty eyes too. Golden. And he won't give us no trouble like these others. All right kid, you got yourself a deal. We'll let these munchkins go in exchange for you."

The man let go of the boy and took a step towards Solo. Solo's eyes flicked towards the greasy man and his captive.

"And the girl?"

"We'll let her go once you've proved we can trust you. I don't want no tricks."

"I promised that I would submit willingly. I may run and I may hide but I never lie." Solo said, raising his voice. "Let her go now or the deal's off."

The man thought for a few moments, observing the resolve on the golden-haired boy's face. Then he seemed to come to a decision.

"Let her go Marty."

"But Hank-"

"I said let her go. We've got what we wanted. He's not going anywhere. He's got no where to go."

The greasy man reluctantly pushed the girl away from him who slid to the ground with a cry of pain, her skirt around her knees. The boy rushed to her side, catching her up in his arms protectively.

"Min! Are you okay?"

The girl nodded, slowly, tears drying on her face as she pulled her skirt up with shaking hands. The boy turned to Solo.

"Solo…"

"Go back to the shelter. Tell the kids that I'll be back later."

The boy's violet eyes were wide with fear and understanding. He was torn between wanting to run away and wanting to stay and help his friend.

"But Solo-"

"GO!" Solo's voice grew harsh and he glared at the children. "I'll be fine. Just leave me. I've made my choice."

"That's right little boy," the greasy man chuckled. "You just run along now before we change our minds. We'll take good care of him don't you worry."

"No…" the boy whispered, horror stricken. "NO!"

"Dammit kid I'm not going to tell you again!" Solo's voice rose and then softened, almost tenderly. "Go on kid. I'll be fine, really. You need to take Min back to the others. She needs you now, okay?"

The boy bit his lip hesitantly and looked down at the terrified, injured child in his arms. He nodded.

Solo smiled. "That a boy. You're a great kid. I'll see ya soon, kay?"

The boy turned his back uncertainly, making his way slowly to the hole in the rubble. He helped the girl through and then took one last look at the golden-haired boy who stood so proudly, even now. He saw the man take his big meaty hand and slid it down Solo's chest into the waistband of his pants. He saw the dead look in his friend's eyes as he was pushed roughly to the ground. And then he turned away, sliding out through the passage, not bearing to look anymore.

'Solo…why?'

~flashback~

Duo shook his head, trying to clear the last traces of that image from his mind. He was aware of Quatre breathing beside him, taking comfort in the fact that the blonde's breathing had evened out even though he was still not asleep.

'I'm about as much help to him as I was to Solo.'

Solo had survived that experience. In fact he had come back the next day, laughing and joking as if nothing had happened. But Duo saw the belt marks on his back, the bruises on his arms and legs. He saw the nail marks on his chest and stomach and noticed the odd way he walked as if it hurt to move. And every so often he caught Solo staring off into space with those awful dead eyes. But when he had attempted to talk to him about the incident, Solo had always brushed him off, telling him to forget about it. Duo never got to say thank you. Solo had died from the plague about two weeks after the incident. The virus had taken him faster than anyone else and a later blood analysis had told him the reason why: Solo had contracted AIDS before he died.

'Everyone I care about ends up dying. Everyone I care about ends up in pain because I'm too weak to help them. I'm so sorry Quatre. I know it doesn't help to say it but I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry…'

Warm, salty streaks of moisture trailed down Duo's cheeks and it took him a moment to figure out what they were.'Tears…'