Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Born Again ❯ Light of my life. ( Chapter 7 )

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Look now towards the heaven and tell the stars, if thou be able to number them, so shall the pages of this chapter be... ^^;;;;

BORN AGAIN

CHAPTER SIX-

LIGHT OF MY LIFE

* * *

Tall and endless mountain ridges covered with snow were the only thing you could see from the top of Hermon Mountain. Fir trees loaded with snow covered the steep mountain surface, the landscape glowing in pure and endless white, reflecting the soft rays of sunshine that filtered through the clouds. At the top of the mountain was a huge ski reservation, surrounded by old country style buildings, the largest of them being a large and wealthy hotel. The architecture was clearly old 19th century design, the structure made of rich and thick wood, large windows decorated for the holidays.

This hotel was well known for hosting society's higher class. Rich men and politicians were all regular visitors to this site. Many VIPs- from movie actors to world leaders- were currently staying at the famous Mt. Hermon Hotel. And so, it was a very peculiar sight when an old AC 189 Dodge made its way up the twisting road that led to the hotel. The car stood out when it parked next to all the fancy shmanzy vehicles around, but its owner didn't seem to mind much as he exited the car with a smile, closing his eyes and inhaling the crisp mountain air.

Duo smiled to himself and opened his eyes. He stretched his limbs a little, looking around with shining violet eyes. "Ain't it great? Just look at this place!" He called happily, still looking left and right. "Sure worth a whole day of boring driving, eh, Heero?" He looked back towards the car, and then frowned. "Heero?" He leaned down to look into the car, and then frowned again. "Heero, why are you still in there? C'mon, get out. You gotta check this place out!"

In the passenger seat, Heero sighed and bowed his head. He was sitting with his hands on his lap, his shoulders slumped and his features wary.

"Heero? What's wrong?" Duo asked in concern, climbing back into the car. He closed the door behind him and then turned to look at his friend. "Is everything all right?" He asked worriedly, placing a gentle hand on Heero's shoulder. "Do you feel sick? I told you not to eat so many snacks... and the road was all winding... are you okay?"

"...no." Heero answered quietly, his head still bowed, his blue eyes looking down at his fidgeting hands.

"No? Why? What's wrong?" Duo hurried to ask, his face paling and his eyes extremely worried. "Do you need anything? Should I call a doctor? Wha-what's wrong, Hee-chan?!"

Heero sighed and pulled away from Duo's grasp on his shoulder. He looked down at his hands for a few moments, before taking a deep breath. "I want to go back home." He mumbled, turning to look up at Duo, his cobalt eyes shimmering with uncertainty. "I changed my mind. I don't want to come."

Now realizing what this was all about, Duo relaxed and sunk back into his seat. He looked up at Heero, his gaze compassionate. "Heero, we discussed this five times already. You said that you wanted to come."

"Yeah, but... but now I don't." The boy let out, turning his gaze to look out the window.

Duo chuckled. "Heero, it's a little too late for that, don't you think?"

Heero sighed and cast his gaze down. "But... but what if they won't like me? What if they... what if they laugh?"

Duo sighed and closed his eyes briefly, taking a deep breath. When he opened his eyes again, the violet orbs were both warm and serious, as he looked up at Heero with reassurance. "Heero, no one is going to laugh at you. I told them what happened, and they understand. Really, Heero, they'll just be glad to see you. They're really looking forward to it."

Heero sighed, casting his gaze down sadly. "They'll think I'm stupid."

Silence fell over the small car as Duo struggled for words. His eyes narrowed in pain and sympathy for his friend. For the longest of time, he just looked at Heero, biting his lower lip in thought. At last, he reached up a hand and cupped the boy's chin in his palm. He gently turned his head so they were facing eye to eye.

Taking a deep breath, Duo looked deeply into those doubtful cobalt eyes, and smiled gently. "Heero, you're not stupid."

Cobalt eyes looked away sadly.

"Heero, look at me." Duo sighed quietly and nudged Heero's head up, forcing the boy to look at him. "You're not stupid." He repeated slowly, looking intensely into the boy's eyes.

Heero sighed, trying to pull away from Duo's gentle hold. But the braided boy wouldn't let him. He pulled the boy's head closer, their lips nearly touching.

Cobalt eyes widened in surprise as they were faced with a determined violet stare.

"Say it." Duo spoke sternly, his eyes bearing holes into Heero.

The Japanese boy sighed for the umpteenth time and looked away.

"Heero..." Duo nearly growled, pulling Heero's closer, his hold on the boy's chin tightening.

Violet glared at blue and blue at violet for what seemed like three eternities. Eventually, Heero gave in sighed and pulled away, shoulders slumped and his head bowed.

".....I'm not stupid."

Duo smiled, pulling away a little. "What was that, Heero? I didn't hear you..."

Heero frowned in irritation and rolled his eyes. His head still bowed, his hands fidgeting, Heero spoke again, louder this time. "I'm not stupid."

"I'm sorry, what was that?" Duo let out teasingly. "I thought I heard you say that you're---"

"I'M NOT STUPID!!!!!!" Heero shouted, his head jerking up, a burning blue fire in his eyes. He was now panting a little, glaring at Duo for pushing him so far.

Duo grinned. "Good boy." He complimented with a smile, tapping lightly on Heero head. "Now lets go get the bags."

And with that, he got out of the car.

Heero let out an exasperated breath of air and bowed his head again. He looked down numbly at his hands, and took a deep breath. "Not stupid..." He looked up at the rear view mirror, seeing Duo pull out their bags out of the trunk. He sighed and turned to look out the window, at the large hotel towering nearby. Taking a deep breath to calm his nervousness, he repeated. "I'm not stupid... not stupid..."

But no matter how many times he said it out loud, he could never convince himself. He always felt stupid.

"Hey, Heero, c'mon! How about some help here, huh?"

* * *

The lobby, as it was to be expected of it, was quite fancy and posh. Thick carpets covered the polished wood floor, and a huge fireplace was located at the small lounge area across of the registration desk. The walls were all decorated for the holidays, and a beautiful Christmas tree stood tall and proud by a large window, over-looking the mountains. The soft chime of bells was in the air, and a small orchestra was playing old Christmas carols to the various people hanging around the lobby.

Duo dropped the bags down to the floor, just gaping at the sight. Behind him, Heero stopped as well, looking around in awe. Wide and stunned eyes drank in every bit of the warm colors and the luxurious furniture. Even the registration desk seemed to be of pure gold, and it blended just great with the warm red and brown colors that ruled the large hall.

"Duo!" A delighted voice called through the crowd, and the two young men at the door looked up in the direction of the voice.

Duo's lips lifted up in a smile, and the minute he spotted that little blond head running past the lobby, his smile turned into a grin. "Q-man!" He called happily, running to greet the boy with a big bear-hug.

Behind him, Heero took a few steps back, bowing his head and trying his best to disappear in the small crowd. He looked up from behind messy bangs, not allowing himself to lift his head up completely. He looked silently at the short, golden haired boy Duo was now hugging, and backed away some more. When he saw the boy hug Duo back, his aquamarine eyes shinning, Heero swallowed and bowed his head again.

"You finally made it!" Quatre called happily, retreating from Duo's bear hug.

Duo chuckled, his violet eyes happy. "Yep! I sorta took the wrong turn around Avie village, but we managed somehow..." He explained with a sheepish smile, rubbing the back of his head.

Quatre smiled. "Only you can manage that, Duo. Didn't you get the map?"

"Ahh... yeah, well... about that... heh..." Duo mumbled sheepishly, his voice trailing off. All along, a pair of shimmering cobalt eyes watching him from afar. "Are the others here yet? Sally and Chang were right behind us, but I think I lost them somewhere around that wrong turn..."

Quatre chuckled and then nodded his head. "Yeah, they arrived about an hour ago. The rest and I are here since yesterday." The blond answered kindly, and then looked around, his eyes searching the lobby. He looked back at Duo, confused. "Is Heero here with you?"

"Oh yeah! Sure!" Duo hurried to answer, turning around to face the door. "He's just a little shy, that's all." He explained, his eyes lighting up with joy as he spotted the Japanese boy still standing by the door, looking very uncertain in this new, and crowded, surrounding.

"Heero!" Duo called, waving at him. When he saw the boy turn to look at him, he gestured for him to come. He noticed Heero's slight hesitation before the boy picked up his small travel bag and began to slowly advance towards the two.

Duo smiled slightly and turned back to Quatre. "He was a little uncertain about coming to meet you guys." He explained to his friend. "He thinks you won't like him cuz he's different and all that."

Quatre looked up at Heero's direction, and smiled softly. "I don't see how that could be." He whispered back, just as Heero came to stand before them. Quatre smiled at him kindly. "Hello Heero."

"Uh... h-hi." Heero answered quietly, fidgeting in his place. He was looking at anything BUT at Quatre, his cheeks blushed with embarrassment.

"I'm Quatre Winner." The blond boy introduced himself.

"I know." The Japanese boy answered, finally looking up at the boy. "I saw your picture."

Quatre smiled and nodded his head. He then hugged the boy, feeling him tense at the unexpected contact. He only hugged Heero once in his life, at the end of the war, and even thought so much time had passed, and Heero had been through some... changes, he still reacted the same. It made Quatre smile as he slowly withdrew.

"It's good to see you, Heero." He spoke with a smile, looking at Heero kindly.

Heero smiled shyly, slightly blushing. "H-hai. Thank you." He mumbled, still a little sheepish, and then suddenly he could feel Duo pat him forcefully on the back, nearly knocking the air out of him.

"Heh, get used to it, Hee-chan!" Duo called, grinning. "You'll be doing a lot of these greeting stuff by tomorrow night!"

"I will?" Heero asked, his voice fearful.

"Sure! There's lotsa people for you to meet!" Duo went on, smiling broadly.

"That's right. A lot of old acquaintance will be here this weekend." Quatre agreed, leading them to the registration desk.

"Yup! People we knew during the war... people we fought with, that sort of stuff." Duo continued as he handed his reservation to the clerk.

Heero, who was following them silently, swallowed and looked around the lobby with doubt in his eyes. "People... people I used to know? People who know me..." He whispered quietly to himself, his blue eyes shimmering with anxiety.

"It's gonna be great, Hee-chan! You'll see! Everyone will be glad to see you again!" Duo promised as he took the keys to their suite. He grinned, waving the key at Heero. "Plus, it's for free! So lets go up and get some room service!"

Quatre chuckled. "Why won't you two get some rest and I'll see you down at the restaurant in a few hours?"

Duo grinned. "Sure! I can't WAIT to see the rest of the guys! Man, I wonder if Tro's anti-gravity bangs got any BIGGER!"

Again the blond chuckled, shaking his head. "Heh, you're in for a surprise, Duo..."

Heero frowned, having a hard time keeping up with the conversation. They were speaking so fast, he felt like he was watching a ping-pong match! Not to mention that he had little idea about whom they were referring to.

"... Okay! I'll see ya tonight, Q-man! C'mon Hee-chan!"

And before Heero had a chance to protest, Duo grabbed him by his wrist and ran towards the elevators. Having no choice but to run after Duo, Heero swallowed again and looked around the lobby once more. He looked at all the people around and wondered if he was supposed to recognize any of them. There were so many people outside... so many people he didn't know... so many people who only knew the 'Old Heero'...

Heero sighed and looked away.

No matter what Duo said, he still didn't feel very happy about coming here.

* * *

"Hey, Heero, did you see my white sweater? The one with the stupid red reindeers on it?" Duo called from his bedroom, while rummaging through his suitcase. "Maybe I put it in your suitcase?"

"I didn't see it, Duo-chan. I'm sorry." Heero answered quietly.

The two young men were now at their large suite, refreshed after a long shower and a little rest. The suite, as the rest of the hotel, was worthy of kings, everything in it classy and posh. There were two bedrooms, each with its own, private bathroom. There was a huge living room with a TV the size of a movie screen, a fireplace and a dinning table. Next to the large living room were two glass doors that led into a large balcony, overlooking the snowy valley. The mini bar was more like a small and fancy supermarket for two, and heck- there was even a Jacuzzi!

Heero was currently standing in the living room, already showered and dressed. He already unpacked his things, and placed Yoshi on the bed, and now he was waiting for Duo to come out of his room. He busied himself with studying this strange and new environment, tracing his fingers over the smooth fireplace; the glass-made dinning table, and the other various artifacts that decorated the suite. He was impressed, but he didn't see the use in having all these things around.

He stopped to look down at a large bouquet of flowers that lay on the dining table. It was set inside a large basket, which was filled with sweets and such. His eyes lighted in joy as he spotted a certain candy bar, his favorite of all sweets in the world: a chocolate-coated granola bar. Duo-chan usually made a face when he ate it, cuz he thought that granola was "Aewww… yucky!". Duo also told him that he ALWAYS liked that candy bar, and that even back during the war, he caught him carrying such a sweet in his bag once or twice. Heero smiled at the thought of liking something the 'Old Heero' liked, and he reached to take the sweet.

When he picked it up, he was surprised to see that there was a small card tucked under it. Curious, he lifted it up.

There was only one problem, and that was that he didn't know how to read. Duo-chan promised to teach him soon, but they didn't get around to it yet. And so, sighing, Heero could do nothing but examine the neat handwriting, musing that it looked like a girl wrote it, and not a boy. It was too pretty for a boy to write it like that. The card also smelled nice, like women's perfume, and Heero wondered what it said.

"Ah! Found it!" Duo called from his bedroom, his voice full of triumph. "No one shall escape the mighty Shinigami- bwhahahaha!!! Oh wait, wrong sweater."

Heero chuckled and shook his head. He looked up at the large grandfather clock across the dinning table. He frowned as he saw that they'd be late. They were supposed to meet a few people down at the restaurant, but that wasn't going to happen anytime soon. Not that Heero cared; he would do anything to postpone the time between now and that meeting.

Sighing, Heero eyed his treat again and went to sit on one of the fluffy armchairs, facing the balcony. He threw himself into the soft cushions, and turned to look in the direction of the bedrooms. He could hear Duo still looking through his stuff, pleading the silly sweater to be found. Deciding that he won't have his dinner for some time, Heero unwrapped his favorite treat, smiling to himself. He began nibbling his sweet, sinking into deep thoughts.

Duo-chan could be so silly sometimes. It was funny most of the time, so he forgave him for being a total baka. Moreover, he was happy to see Duo smiling and cheerful. He was very different than the Duo-chan he remembered from the beginning. Ever since he came back to him, Duo-chan was much happier. He was smiling again, and he didn't get mad a lot. Sure, sometimes he got a little upset or angry or sad, but it was normal, because Heero knew that he felt the same from time to time.

It's been a year since Duo-chan rescued him from the Bad Dark Place, and life was much better now, for both of them. They did a lot of fun things together. Duo took time off from work and went out with Heero on all sorts of trips. They went to museums and parks, and they went hiking and to the beach and theme parks and EVERYTHING. Heero had a LOT of fun during those times, not to mention that he learned a lot. No matter where Duo took him, the braided boy always managed to teach him something in the process. Heero loved to learn, and if he could have, he would have sat down all day and read books and learn from them. That's why he couldn't wait for Duo to teach him the ABC. He couldn't wait to read and write like everybody else.

Heero knew that no matter how much he had learned, he was still different from everybody else. Duo-chan kept trying to convince him that it was not true, and that he was NOT stupid, but it still bothered Heero when he couldn't understand some things. He was sure that if he knew how to read, he could have helped Duo with the map, and then they wouldn't have gotten lost on the way. Or if he knew how to do all the things Duo did around the house, then Duo wouldn't have to work so hard for him. He felt like a nuisance at times, and no matter what Duo said or did, the feeling didn't change. How could it possibly change? He was living under the shadow of a man so much greater and different from him... how could he EVER live up to him?

The answer was, that he couldn't. He couldn't possibly match up to the great war-hero everyone around here remembered. That's why he didn't want to come here.

It was the third anniversary to the end of the war, a war he helped to end. Duo told him that everyone he knew during the war will be there, and that thought frightened him more than anything else in the world. How can he possibly face all these people? Those people didn't know him; they knew the 'Old-Heero'! They knew the smart and the strong soldier Heero.

They didn't know him. They probably didn't want to know him. The one who took the 'Old-Heero' away. The one who can do nothing but to be stupid...

"Okay, I'm ready!" Duo's voice called happily as the braided boy walked into the living room. He gestured down at his sweater, looking at Heero with a silly grin on his face. "What do ya think?"

Heero looked away from the window, turning to face Duo.

He frowned. The combination of Duo and bright/cheery clothing was not something you saw everyday.

Heero smiled weakly, studying the sweater with slight apprehension. "It's, uh... nice."

"You mean it's stupid." Duo muttered, frowning down at his sweater.

Heero's eyes widened painfully for a second and he looked away.

"Ch! You're right! I'll go change it!" Duo announced, walking back to his room. "Don't wanna look TOO silly when I meet the gang tonight!" He continued talking from the bedroom. "I can just SEE the look on Wu-man's face!"

"Yeah..." Heero mumbled and returned to nibble at his candy bar. "Change it..." He sighed quietly, his blue eyes shimmering sadly. "Don't you wish that you could, Duo-chan?"

* * *

About an hour later they were all seated by a large table, at a fancy restaurant. Like the hotel itself, the restaurant was beautifully designed like an old inn. Everything was made of thick and rich wood, and large windows over-looking the snowy valley. It was the late evening hours, and everything was washed in pure blue moonlight, reflecting off the snow that covered the fine fir trees. The midnight blue skies were clear and offered a view to the beautiful sea of stars.

Cobalt blue eyes slowly closed and looked away from the twinkling sea of stars. With a sigh, Heero bowed his head and looked down at his hands, which rested on his lap.

Despite the large amount of time it took Duo to get ready, they were among the first to arrive at the restaurant. Sally, Meiran and Chang were there, already seated, but the rest were yet to come. Heero found himself fidgeting in his seat while they waited for Quatre and the others to arrive. To say that he was nervous would have been an understatement. He was a fidgeting and squirming wreck of nervous energy. Even Duo-chan wasn't this bad when he was nervous!

Surprisingly enough, the meeting and greetings went on pretty well. He was quite shocked when he was suddenly pulled into a tight hug from a girl he didn't even know. When he flinched and shied away, the girl just laughed in good-humor and introduced herself as Catherine Bloom, Trowa's sister. That's when Heero heard Duo shriek in surprise and then start laughing like the three stooges just walked in.

When he turned around, he could see Quatre, and next to him, stood a taller boy, at which Duo was pointing and laughing. Heero blinked, a little confused, because he didn't see anything funny about the boy. Actually, he was looking quite pissed at Duo's behavior.

It took him a few seconds, but then he realized that the boy was Trowa Barton. It was a little hard to tell, for Heero only saw his picture once or twice. And in the picture, his hair was VERY different. While in the picture he had bangs that defied gravity, now he had shoulder-length hair that was held back in a short ponytail[i]. Heero's lips lifted up in a small smile. He could sort of understand why Duo was laughing so hard.

Trowa, on his behalf, just ignored the laughing boy and walked over to greet Heero with a handshake. It was fifteen minutes later when Duo was finally capable to choke out an 'hi Trowa!' and then keep laughing.

Yet after that warm, but brief, introduction, all took their seats around the table and the conversation began. That's also when everyone seemed to have forgotten about Heero's existence. It took them about three minutes of small talk before they launched into a full scale conversation about the war, talking about what only they could understand. Private jokes and codes only they knew the meaning of. They were completing each other's sentences, laughing before the punch line was even spoken. There was a glow in their eyes unlike any glow Heero had ever seen before. Even though they were talking about something as horrible as a war, it seemed like they were reliving the best moments of their lives. Their excitement clearly showed in their speech, and they were all talking so animatedly, their hands moving objects only they could see.

Heero sighed and shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He had given up on smiling at jokes he failed to comprehend and he had stopped following the highway-of-a-conversation long ago. He busied himself with separating the different foods he had in his dish, arranging them neatly around the edges of his plate.

Next to him, Duo burst out laughing again, nearly falling back with his chair.

"Oh gosh! I remember that! Man! You like came busting in there with ten charges and the guy went like 'Don't put it here, we need it for the--'"

"Gundam destroyer!" Quatre finished the sentence and the two boys burst out laughing.

Heero swallowed and bowed his head, raising his fork up in order to squash a few veggies.

"That's nothing." Trowa began, leaning back in his seat and crossing his arms over his chest. He looked up at Wufei. "Remember Gilo One?"

Heero looked up at Wufei, seeing a small smile slowly creep up his lips.

"How can I forget those assholes?" The Chinese man snorted, smirking.

Trowa nodded, a sly smile on his face. "Don't press that button or I'll make sure the---"

Trowa didn't even complete the sentence, and Wufei was already laughing so hard that he was out of breath. The rest were soon to join.

Heero sighed and turned to pick on his food, using two out of his FOUR forks in order to shove some potatoes aside.

"Ha!" Duo choked out, nearly punching the table. "And who was the genius who decided that floating lattés is a good distraction?!"

Heero returned to forcefully squash his food, his fork descending down mercilessly.

Quatre chuckled, wiping a tear of laughter out the corner of his eye. "I don't remember, but I do remember how OZ freaked out when they discovered all the supplies are floating around the space station!"

"Ha! I even had some time to shoot some hoops, with a melon and an freaking-out OZ cadet!" Duo continued laughing. "Heck, they had so many veggies flying around, you could think OZ opened a new market place!"

Trowa and Wufei chuckled and Heero squashed another defenseless piece of food.

"Man! That was some GOOD thinking." Duo now muttered, scratching his head. "Who did that anyway?"

"Heero did." Sally suddenly answered.

And silence fell around the dining table.

For a long time, they were all seated in a heavy and tense atmosphere.

Heero squashed another piece of his meal and the silence grew prolonged.

"Oh... Right." Duo mumbled, now feeling a little uncomfortable. Subdued, he turned his eyes Heero's way, eyes which soon narrowed painfully as he caught sight of the boy's blue orbs. The usually raging blue oceans were now calm and quiet, their light gone and their color dark. Heero was sitting with his shoulders slumped and his head bowed, playing quietly with his food, a sure sign that he was upset.

Duo lowered his gaze sadly, turning his head away.

All the occupants around the table fell silent as well, their heads bowed in shame. The awkward silence lasted until the end of the meal, as each of the people seated by the table concentrated solely on their meals, speaking quietly between themselves from time to time.

Duo took a long sip from his drink and Heero continued sitting quietly, refusing to lift his gaze up from his meal as he played with his food. He angrily squashed the various vegetables, deliberately ignoring everyone around him.

"So, uh, I heard you had a little trouble on the way?" Trowa spoke up after a while, breaking the heavy silence. "What happened? Did you take the wrong turn?"

Duo took a deep breath and looked up. "Yeah, something like that..."

They were all back to the 'small-talk' conversation, spending the rest of the meal in an awkward silence punctuated by short and forced-out sentences.

Heero remind silent though, knowing that once again, he was the reason the smiles disappeared from everybody's faces.

* * *

Later that night, Duo walked heavily out of the bathroom, after brushing his teeth. He was already in his pajamas, ready for bed, but instead of walking over to the king size bed, he made his way out of the large bedroom, padding towards Heero's room. Taking a deep breath, he stood before the closed door, raising his hand up in order to knock.

When they came back from the restaurant, Heero went straight to bed. He didn't mutter a single word the whole evening, and his whole demeanor radiated misery and gloom. Duo cursed himself a thousand times for leaving Heero out of the conversation. He was so happy to be sitting around the same table with the WHOLE gang, that he got completely lost in his joy. It was just like all time, the whole bunch of them sitting together, swopping stories and fooling around. And just like old times, he was the one to dominate the conversation, Quatre was the one to giggle, Wufei to snort and Trowa to offer a few comments here and there. And just like old times, Heero would be sitting next to him, completely silent and unsociable. For a moment, Duo could have sworn that he was three years younger.

But it was NOT the same. Heero's silence was not the same. When once he could have regarded the boy's silence to be a lack of interest or even boredom, now it was there for a different reason. It's not that Heero didn't want to talk. He just didn't know how to fit in. The boy loved it when someone paid attention to him and spoke to him. All you had to do was start the conversation and already those big blue eyes would light up with joy.

Duo knew that despite the fear and doubt, Heero had looked forward to meeting his ex-comrades. He was fascinated with everything that had to do with his old self. He was probably looking forward to ask his questions and fill in more blanks about the person he once had been.

But no one paid attention to him. They had rendered him silent and continued laughing. Heero's silence was not there because lack of interest, it was there because they scared him off. They shoved him into his own silent little corner and didn't give him a chance to come out. Heero probably thought that, once again, no one took interest in him. And like so many other times, he probably blamed himself for it.

Duo closed his eyes sadly, balling his hands into fists. Yet again, he had managed to hurt Heero. No matter what he did, he was never good enough for the boy. Somehow, he always managed to do the wrong thing!

Sighing, Duo slowly knocked on Heero's door.

There was no answer, and he wasn't expecting one either.

Duo sighed again and reached down for the doorknob. "Heero, I'm coming in."

He found Heero lying silently in his bed, his back to the door. Only pale moonlight illuminated his slim figure, reflecting off the white sheets of his bed. The blanket was tossed carelessly aside, revealing the boy's body, for he was wearing only a pair of boxers and a sloppy tank top. Yoshi was slumped somewhere next to Heero, looking like he had been tossed aside.

Duo frowned when he noticed that Heero was slowly rubbing his upper arm, his movements slow and careful, as if it will hurt if he'll brush over it too hard. Now getting worried, Duo took a few more steps into the room. "Hee-chan? Are you okay?"

He could hear the boy sigh, and then shift in his bed, sheets rustling in the darkness of the room. He didn't turn to face him though, and only shifted a little so he was closer to the wall.

Duo sighed, coming to sit on the edge of the bed. He ran a hesitant hand through his long bangs and turned to look down at the boy. He took a deep breath, still searching for words that can explain his terrible crime. The room was silent as he searched for the right thing to say, the seconds slowly ticking by. On the bed, Heero remained motionless, his back still facing Duo as he looked down at his hands.

Duo sighed, bowing his head sadly. "Hee--"

"These scars..." Heero cut him off with a silent whisper, slowly lifting his hand up. He rested his palm on his upper arm again, slowly brushing against a small mark that scared the fair skin. "They're on my body, but... but I don't feel like they're mine..."

Duo's heart clenched painfully, his eyes shimmering sadly in the darkess. He slowly reached down and placed a hand over Heero's, looking down at him compassionately. "Heero..."

Sighing, the boy pulled away from his touch, slowly turning around so he could look up at Duo. His cobalt eyes were also shimmering, tears glistering under pale moonlight. "I don't... I don't feel like I'm me..." He whispered, closing his eyes sadly. His fist closed around his slender arm, squeezing the scared flesh. "I don't know... I don't remember how I got them..."

Duo swallowed, resisting the urge to whimper. He closed his eyes tightly, trying to hold back the tears that insisted on flooding his eyes. His fists clenched and he looked away for a moment, unable to meet those hurt blue eyes.

"My body..." Heero continued sadly, curling into a small ball as he looked down on his body. "It's like it doesn't belong to me..." He sniffed, tracing a hand over another small scar, on his thigh. He slowly caressed it, his long fingers trembling ever so slightly. His gaze was numb and tearful, glazed over with bitterness and tears. "They were talking about a different Heero Yuy today... I'm... I'm not him..."

Again, he nearly let out a choked whimper. It took him a few long moments to pull himself together. Slowly, he turned around, facing Heero again. The boy was looking down at his thigh, a lone tear running down his pale cheek.

Taking a deep breath, Duo reached down to wipe that tears away. "These scars..." He began, his voice soft and gentle. "You got them when we first met." He continued, now caressing Heero's cheek, his hand slowly trailing down to brush over the small scar on Heero's upper arm. He looked down at it for a moment, and then chuckled bitterly. "Actually, I shot you. Twice."

Shocked, Heero jerked his head up, wide blue eyes looking up at Duo. Tears were still shining in his eyes, but they ceased from coming. He gaped at Duo in utter shock and surprise.

Duo smiled bitterly, just a little sad tug at his lips. "Yeah... it wasn't very nice of me, now was it?"

Heero swallowed, bowing his head down briefly. He looked back at Duo, his blue eyes still stunned. "You sh-shot me!? Wh-why? Di-did I try to kill you?"

Duo's smile grew a little and he shook his head. "No... but you were going to shoot someone else. I stopped you." Again he chuckled, his smile growing even more. The light was slowly coming back to his violet eyes, and he couldn't help but chuckle again at the memory. He was looking up ahead, lost in a sea of memories. "Ch! I shot you once, but you still went at it. I shot you again and you just kept on coming." He looked down at Heero with a kind smile, and reached down to ruffle the boy's messy hair. "You were always one tough, stubborn, stone-headed sonofabitch. Ch. You still are."

The tears now completely gone, Heero smiled shyly, bowing his head in embarrassment.

"There's no stopping you once you put your mind into something." Duo continued with a smile, stroking Heero's hair as he spoke. He sighed in amusement, looking down into Heero's shining cobalt eyes. He smiled, flicking the boy's tender cheek with the tip of his finger. "I guess you'll never change..."

Heero's lips lifted up in a small smile, his cheeks slightly blushed. "Hontou ka..?" He mumbled, looking down at his fingers as they played with the white sheets.

Duo sighed, shrugging a little. "Like I said, you'll always be one stubborn bastard."

Sheets rustled as Heero shifted on the bed again, turning so he lay on his back, looking up at Duo with his shimmering blue eyes. "Was I the bad one?" He asked quietly, his voice uncertain and his eyes fearful. "Is that why you had to shoot me?"

Duo laughed lightly, shaking his head. "Nah... as it turned out, I ended up as the bad guy..." He sighed in amusement, looking down at Heero with an apologetic gleam in his eyes. "Like always, ne?" He smiled wistfully, and ruffled Heero's hair again.

Heero cast his gaze down sadly. "Not always..."

Duo sighed, settling more comfortably on the bed. He sat down so that Heero's head was at the same level as his hips, and he leaned against the wall. He smiled as Heero slowly came to rest his head in his lap, his arms wrapping themselves around him. He bent down to kiss the boy's forehead, and then returned to simply stroke his hair gently.

He took a deep breath, leaning his head back against the wall. His eyes gazed up at the ceiling, shining with a distant gleam. "It was just a big misunderstanding." He explained quietly, his fingers running between thick strands of chocolate brown hair. "You were trying to shoot Relena and destroy my Gundam, along with yours."

Heero frowned, turning his head up so he could look at Duo's face. "Re-Relena? The one who invited us here?"

Duo rolled his eyes and then looked down, smiling kindly at the boy. He nodded his head. "Hm hmm. That's her alright."

Heero's frown deepened and he lay his head back on Duo's lap, looking up ahead in confusion. "Why did I try to shoot her?"

Duo snorted. "Don't even get me STARTED on that one, Hee-chan..."

Heero made a displeased face, suddenly thinking about the card he found in the basket of treats. He dismissed it though, knowing that he will find out sooner or later.

The silence returned to the dark bedroom as both boys sunk deeply into their musings. Duo continued to caress Heero's hair, as the boy lay on his lap, looking a little sleepy. After a while of silence, Duo could feel him turn, and he looked down, only to meet a pair of expressive cobalt eyes, looking up at him uncertainly.

"Anou...they... they said, on... on TV," Heero began quietly, looking around for a moment and then back at Duo, his eyes a little hesitant. "There was... there was a show about all the mobile suits." He continued, shifting a little, as if suddenly uncomfortable.

Duo looked down at him in questions, now seeing that the boy was more than a little sheepish.

Heero smiled nervously and looked up at Duo again. "Anou, I just wanted to know... uh..." He took a deep breath, and then looked up at Duo, determined. "Whi-which one was mine?"

Duo sighed quietly, his hand ceasing its play with the chocolate strands. "Wing." He answered quietly, suddenly feeling a little uneasy with the conversation.

Heero frowned. "Which one is that?"

Duo sighed again, shifting a little. He looked down at Heero, his violet eyes serious. "Zero One."

Heero's eyes seem to light up again, as the boy smiled sheepishly. "Ah, souka... it does have wings..." He chuckled at his own silliness, looking up at Duo with eyes that shone with curiosity. "And yours?"

Duo forced himself to snap out of the gloom, and looked down at Heero again. He smiled slightly. "Deathscythe. That's the black one. Zero Two."

"Oh." Heero let out, bowing his head. He seemed to deflate a little, his shoulders slumping.

Duo frowned, raising himself up a little, trying to see Heero better. "Heero? What's wrong?" He asked worriedly.

Heero shrugged. "Nothing... It's just that I... I was kinda hoping that..." He paused, unsure, then slowly turned around to face Duo, smiling sheepishly. "I was kinda hoping it would be mine..."

It took him about three seconds to realize what the boy had just confessed, and then Duo Maxwell burst out laughing.

Heero smiled, happy to be hearing Duo's rich laughter. His smile grew even bigger when he realized that he was the one who made him laugh.

"Ha!" Duo choked out, still laughing. "You wish, buster! Deathscythe's MY buddy!"

Heero giggled, ducking his head between his shoulders as Duo roughly ruffled his hair. His eyes shone happily as he looked up at his laughing friend, unable to get enough of that joyful sight.

"Ha! I can't believe that I finally managed to get YOU admit that Deathscythe is cooler! Hahaha! That was precious!"

Heero's smile slowly faded and he bowed his head down again.

Noticing Heero's silence, Duo also managed to calm down, and looked down at his sulking friend. Heero was still resting on his lap, but his gaze was far away, his fingers slowly playing with the sheets. Duo sighed heavily, realizing that he had spoiled the moment. Lost for words, he merely stroked Heero's hair, the two of them sitting quietly in the darkness.

". . .Duo-chan?" Heero whispered after sometime, not turning his gaze away from the wall as he spoke.

"Yeah?" Duo whispered back, looking down at Heero, still stroking his hair.

The boy sighed, slowly detaching himself from Duo as he sat up. They were now sitting face to face, looking eye to eye.

Heero sighed again, casting his gaze down sadly. "Do you... do you feel sad when you think how different I am?"

"What do you mean?" Duo asked cautiously.

Heero shrugged, keeping his head bowed. "You know... now that I'm stupid and I don't remember all the things."

Duo shook his head. "Heero," He began softly, reaching a hand down and taking Heero's hand in his. Heero looked up, a bit surprised, and Duo smiled at him kindly.

"Heero, as a person, I don't think you're that different at all. And you are definitely NOT stupid."

Heero sighed, looking away. "Yeah, but... but don't you miss the 'Old Heero'? Don't you wish that he was here instead?"

Duo swallowed, now facing a trick question. How should he answer that? Bowing his head down for a second, he quickly made his decision and looked up again. Tightening his hold on Heero's hand, he captured the boy's uncertain gaze.

"Heero, 'he' is here. You're here."

Heero's eyes widened in surprise.

"Heero, I'm just glad to be with you. It shouldn't matter if you don't remember the war, and you have no idea which Gundam was which. I still enjoy being with you. I'm happy when you're with me. That's all that matters, Heero. You're with me. Nothing else matters."

Heero's lips lifted up in a small smile. "Even if I don't always say smart things?"

Duo chuckled. "Like I'm a fucking brainiac!"

Heero's smile broadened.

Duo chuckled again, lifting Heero's hand up to press a soft kiss on the warm palm, his own eyes shining with warmth and love. "Heero, I don't think that you're stupid, and I don't mind that you've changed. I just want you to be with me, and I want you to have fun this weekend. Don't let things get you down. Fuck what everybody thinks! You're gonna go there tomorrow, and you're gonna eat all the shmancy food they have there and I'll even let you drink wine!"

Heero chuckled and Duo took a deep breath, now looking seriously at Heero. "Promise me you'll have fun?"

Heero nodded. "Aa. Promise." He smiled and then jumped up to hug Duo tightly. "Arigatou, Duo-chan..."

Caught by surprise, Duo flinched for a second, but then quickly brought his arms up and squeezed Heero tightly. He felt the boy rest his head on his shoulder, and his hold on the boy tightened. He closed his eyes in content, leaning his head on the top of Heero's. Sighing pleasantly, he carefully guided them both so they were lying down and prepared to go to sleep.

//Heero, as from tonight, I'm gonna forget that you're so different.. And maybe one day... one day, I'll be able to tell you that I love you...//

* * *

"Ne, Duo-chan! Look!" Heero called towards his friend, waving his hands and gesturing down at a pile of snow at his feet. It was the morning before the Anniversary Ball, and they were spending it outside, in the snow. Sally and Chang were also there with their daughter, and the rest of the ex-pilots (and one ex-pilot's sister) also joined them. They were currently in some small forest, surrounded by green fir trees that were covered with snow. Duo and Quatre were sitting by a small picnic table, drinking coffee, while Wufei and Sally were taking a walk with Meiran. Trowa and Cathy went to do some skiing and were due back for lunch.

Duo smiled, looking up at Heero. "Wow, man, that's a hell of a lot snow. What are you gonna do with it?" He called with a smile.

Quatre chuckled. "Well, as long as you two won't start another snowball fight, I think it will be safe..."

Heero chuckled as well. "Baka! I'm not gonna throw something THIS big at Duo-chan!" He snorted, rolling his eyes. "I'm making a snowman!" He pointed at the large pile of snow, looking up at Duo. "You wanna help me?"

Duo smiled and shook his head. "Maybe later, Hee-chan. I'm just gonna finish my coffee, kay?"

"Okay." Heero replied, shrugging. He turned back to make his snowman, shaping the pile of snow into a large ball. Duo watched him as he made another ball and another, each one smaller from the others. Heero was looking like he was very focused on his job, his face a mask of concentration and resolve. When Heero began placing the snowballs on top of each other, Duo had to admit that he was impressed by how quickly and accurately the boy had managed to put the snowman together.

But when he saw Heero take his sweater off and put it on the snowman, he wasn't so pleased. He hurried to put his coffee aside and ran over to Heero.

The Japanese boy looked up, smiling at Duo as the other approached him. "Is it good?" He asked, his eyes shining with hope and delight.

"Yeah, Hee-chan, it's great, but I why did you take your sweater off?" Duo answered, looking down at him worriedly. He bent to pick up the sweater.

Heero frowned, looking at him in confusion. "To put it on the snowman. So he won't be cold."

Duo chuckled, nudging the sweater towards Heero, signaling him to put it on. "Hee-chan, a snowman can't be cold."

"Why?" Heero asked, raising his hands up so Duo could slide the sweater over his head.

Duo sighed, arranging Heero's sweater and the collar of his shirt. "Well... it's made of snow, right?"

Heero nodded, glancing at the snowman.

Duo smiled. "So if it's made of snow, it can't be cold, right? But you're not made of snow, so you can get a cold if you don't wear a sweater." He explained with a smile, tapping lightly on Heero's head.

Heero frowned again, looking a little confused. He glanced at the snowman and then at Duo, and then back again. "Anou... but what if he just looks like he's cold on the outside, and he's warm on the inside? What if he just wants you to think that he isn't?"

Duo just gaped at Heero, completely lost for words. "Well, uh..."

"Maybe he just wants to pretend." Heero continued, shrugging. "And now he is cold, cuz he covered himself with snow." He looked up at Duo, cobalt eyes sparkling. He smiled. "So I'm gonna give him a sweater and make him warmer, ne?"

"Uh. . ." Duo stuttered, still a little lost. "I think it would be better if you keep it on."

Heero pouted and looked away. "Oh." He let out, sniffling. "I'm sorry, Duo-chan. I said something stupid again, huh?" He bowed his head down miserably, his fingers playing with the snow. "I'm sorry..."

Duo, who was still standing over him, looked at Heero with a wretched expression on his face. His eyes shone with sympathy and regret. He took a deep breath, and knelt down on the snow. He rested his hand on Heero's slumped shoulder, and smiled when the boy turned to look at him. "No, Hee-chan. You didn't say something stupid at all. It was actually quite thought inspiring. Maybe the snowman is cold, I don't' know, but to be honest, I just want you to be warm."

"Don't you care about the snowman?" Heero pouted, looking at Duo with big blue puppy-eyes.

Duo chuckled. "What am I gonna do with you, huh?" He spoke in amusement, taking off his jacket, which he wore over his sweater, and gently placed it around the snowman.

Heero smiled.

"Here, all done. He'll be so hot- he'll melt!" Duo turned to Heero, smiling. "Happy?"

"Aa." The boy nodded, his eyes sparkling with joy. "Arigatou, Duo-chan."

"Anytime." Duo grunted as he climbed up to his feet, catching the sight of one giggling Quatre as he did. He rolled his eyes and turned to look down at Heero. "I'm gonna finish my coffee now, kay? Make sure to bring me back my jacket after snow-dude here is done melting, kay?"

Heero nodded, already ignoring Duo and turning back to his work. "Maybe if he'll melt you'll get to see if really covered himself with snow."

Duo chuckled. "Maybe." He shook his head at Heero reasoning, and walked back to the picnic table.

Quatre giggled as Duo came back to drink his coffee. "You're fussing over him."

Duo rolled his eyes, sipping his coffee. "I am not."

Again Quatre chuckled. "Right." He shook his head in amusement, and turned to look at Heero's direction, watching the boy as he adjusted the snowman's jacket. He sighed and turned to look at Duo. "How old is he by now?"

"Huh?" Duo let out, turning to face his friend as well. "What kinda question is that? He's approaching twenty. Just like the rest of us."

Quatre sighed, shaking his head. "No... I mean mentally."

"Oh..." Duo let out, his smile slowly fading. He took a deep breath and sipped his coffee. He then looked up at Heero again, and sighed. "Sally says that he must be around six or seven." His solemn expression suddenly turned angry and he whirled around, looking at Quatre sternly. "But if you treat him like a six-year-old, I'm gonna punch you in the face!" He growled, his violet eyes threatening.

Quatre nearly flinched. "Wow, Duo... relax..." He tried to calm the boy, gesturing him to calm down. "I had no intention of doing so. I was just wondering, that's all."

Duo sighed, looking away in shame. "I'm sorry Q-man... it's just that I hate seeing people treat him that way. And I know that Heero hates it as well. He understands a lot, even if it doesn't really show it. The problem is that he is still very inexperienced. Not to mention naïve... I guess that it just scares me sometimes..."

Quatre giggled silently. "Which explains why you fuss over him like a mother hen."

"Hey! I do not!"

"Right." Quatre rolled his eyes, smiling teasingly. "Duo, you should have seen yourself just a few moments ago! I wish I had a camera with me!"

"I did NOT fuss! I was merely making sure that he wouldn't be cold."

"You mean you were fussing."

"Was NOT!"

"You just keep saying that, Duo..." Quatre finished with a smile, waving the braided boy goodbye as he slowly walked away.

Duo pouted stubbornly, crossing his arms over his chest. "I don't fuss..." He muttered, looking up at Heero's direction. He saw the boy smile as Quatre came to help him with his snowman, and his eyes lighted when he caught the sight of a little snow-braid.

He also noticed that Heero had removed his gloves and immediately scowled. He began marching towards the boy, but not before he went to pick up the discarded gloves. Ch! Quatre had NO idea on what he was talking about! He was so not fussing!

* * *

"Ne, Duo-chan?"

"Huh?"

"Can I put it on myself?"

Duo smiled, looking at Heero with pride. "Sure." He said, handing Heero a bottle of shaving cream. "Just be careful not to spill it."

"I won't." Heero promised, opening the bottle.

Duo smiled, watching Heero as he worked thoughtfully to smear the white foam on his face. It was evening, and they were both standing in the bathroom, after each one had taken his shower. They were still wearing nothing but boxers and an undershirt, standing in front of the mirror. Duo was drying his hair with a hair drier, after already shaving. He was looking at himself in the mirror, scowling at his stubborn hair that wouldn't be brushed.

"I swear I'm gonna chop it all off one day..." He muttered, wincing as he tugged his own hair too hard. "It just ain't worth trouble, ya know?"

Heero chuckled, pouring some more shaving cream into the palm of his hand. "You always say that and then when we go to cut it, you don't want to anymore."

"Yeah, well, it's the thought that counts." Duo mumbled, running a brush through his long and thick hair. He sighed and turned his gaze so he was looking at Heero's reflection. He smiled as he watched the boy smooth the white foam on his features, looking very concentrated on his work. His movements were careful and almost graceful as he made sure to cover every inch of exposed skin, looking at himself in the mirror as he worked. He watched as Heero leaned down to wash the foam off his hands and his eyes narrowed as he saw the boy reach for his razor.

He gasped and hurried to stop him. "Wow. Wow! Wait a minute here, buddy... I thought I told you to wait until I'm finished with my hair..."

Heero sighed, letting go of the shaver. He looked at Duo and pouted. "I want to try alone this time." He let out carefully, his blue eyes shimmering with plea. "I think maybe I can..."

Duo bit his lower lip, looking at Heero thoughtfully. He was always the one to shave Heero, for he didn't think it was a good idea to let the boy handle a sharp razor blade on his own. It wasn't that he thought that the boy was too stupid to handle such a simple task, it was just that he was worried...

"Please, Duo-chan? I think I can do it. And then we won't be late cuz you can dry your hair and I'll shave alone."

But if he was trying to make Heero understand that he is NOT stupid, he had to make him feel like he was trusted when it came to handling on his own. And if he was right here next to him, he could make sure that everything is all right. After all, Heero had watched him shave countless of times and he knew what needed to be done. Quatre was right; he WAS fussing over Heero like a mother hen. And it was not helping in Heero's development.

Sighing in defeat, Duo slumped his shoulders and nodded his head. He took a deep breath and then smiled at Heero. He handed him the razor.

"Just be gentle with it, okay? Take it nice and easy so you won't cut yourself, okay?

Heero smiled broadly and hurried to nod his head. He took the shaver in his hand and turned to the mirror. Duo watched him carefully as he began to shave, his blue eyes narrowing in deep concentration.

Duo smiled in satisfaction and turned his attention back to his hair. "I gotta hand it to you Hee-chan, you've really come a long way."

Heero frowned, his cobalt eyes glancing at Duo's reflection in confusion. "Where did I go?"

Duo chuckled, shaking his head. "No, silly, I mean that you've managed to learn a lot. In one short year, you've managed to achieve so much."

Heero made a face, as if not agreeing with Duo's statement. But he remained silent and continued his work. He washed the blade in the water that filled the sink and then brought it back up to his right cheek.

Still smiling, Duo put the drier aside and began to brush his hair, looking down at his work, but his eyes shone with pride. "That's why I think that you're being a little too harsh on yourself." He continued, lifting his hand up in order to untangle a knot of hairs.

Heero rolled his eyes and turned to shave his other cheek.

"I mean, the fact that you don't remember all the stuff we were talking about the other day, doesn't make you less of a person. You are a very capable person, Heero. Don't let ANYONE tell you otherwise." He put the brush aside and gathered his lush hair in his hands, quickly braiding it. His movements were automatic, and he looked up at Heero's reflection. He then turned to look at the boy himself, his violet eyes shining with the light of his smile.

"I'm proud of you, Heero."

Heero winced and quickly shifted the blade away from his face. He scowled at himself, glaring at his own refection. He then sighed heavily and turned to Duo, offering him the razor.

"I cut myself."

Duo's smile didn't waver. He shrugged. "No big deal, happens to me all the time." He turned to take some toilet paper and soaked it with some water. He turned back to Heero. "Here, put it on for a few seconds and it's all gone." He covered the small cut on Heero's cheek and then flicked the boy's nose with the tip of his finger. "No biggie."

Heero sighed, dejected. He turned away from Duo, his blue eyes slowly filling with tears. "You can do the rest now..." He mumbled, his voice sad.

Duo shook his head, looking at Heero in sympathy. He placed the blade back in his hands. "No, you can do it. C'mon."

Heero looked down at the blade resting in his palm and sighed. He looked up at Duo. "And if I cut myself again?"

Duo smiled warmly. "Then I'll be here to give ya some more paper."

Heero smiled and nodded his head thankfully. He turned back to the mirror, and finished shaving himself. Duo's eyes were on him all along, shining with warmth and pride.

* * *

An hour later Duo and Heero walked into the main ballroom of the Hermon hotel. Duo stopped at the doorway, gaping in awe at the posh surrounding. As to be expected, the ballroom was ten times fancier than the hotel itself. Large windows instead of walls, each window framed in gold, surrounded the entire structure. Golden candlesticks separated each large window from the next, about half a dozen candles burning bright on each stand. Outside the ballroom, the view was outstanding: an endless sea of stars sparkling above snowy ridges. In the middle of the large ballroom, was a great fountain. The water flowing from it seemed to be glistering in gold under the warm orange lights that illuminated the place.

Many waiters and waitresses walked around the numerous guests, serving drinks and appetizers. An orchestra was performing on a large stage in the back of the room, facing the dance floor. And between the bar and buffet, that stood by the entrance of the hall, and the dance floor that stood on the other side, were many tables for the diners.

Duo forced himself to swallow and reached up a hand, unconsciously fixing his tie. He was dressed in a black evening suit, something elegant, but not too fancy, giving the braided youth a young and sexy look. And although he knew that his outfit was suitable for such an event, and looked rather good on him, he felt very out of place all of a sudden. And if he felt out of place, Heero must have felt like he had just landed on an alien planet.

Taking a deep breath, Duo slowly turned to look at the boy standing next to him. Heero was dressed in a light-blue jacket, a white shirt and a matching blue vest. His trousers were also light-blue, but unlike a few months ago, Heero didn't need a belt to support his trousers, which were usually too big for his thin form. He had gained some weight over the past few months (thanks to Sally's suggested diet), and he was now filled right in the right places. The jacket was designed so it narrowed at the waistline, highlighting the boy's well-shaped figure. Also, much to Heero's displeasure, a dark blue ribbon-tie adorned his slender neck. Needless to say that the Japanese boy managed to turn quite a few heads when the two ex-pilots walked into the room. Though he was too nervous to notice.

"Heero, you okay?" Duo asked quietly, looking at the boy in concern.

Heero took a deep breath and tore his eyes off the large ballroom. He looked up at Duo and swallowed. "There's lots of people..." He mumbled, looking a little uncertain of himself. "I have to know all of them?"

Duo smiled and shook his head. "No. No you don't. C'mon, it'll be fine. Lets go look for Q-man and the others, kay?" He took Heero's hand and together they walked into the crowd.

Heero did his best to shy away, refusing to look anyone in the eye as they walked among the sea of people. He could feel some people stare at him, and it made him VERY uncomfortable. He did his best to keep up with Duo's pace, but it was hard to concentrate under all the gazes directed at him. Every time he passed by someone, when they thought that he was out of hearing range, they started whispering behind him. He wondered what they were saying. He knew that it mustn't be good...

They found Quatre by the bar, along with Wufei and Sally.

"Yo! Wu-man! Wussup?" Duo called happily, waving at his friend.

Heero followed him to the bar, ducking his head between his shoulders.

"Hey Duo, hey Heero. Looking good." Quatre greeted with a smile, gesturing towards the two with his glass of orange juice.

"I'm surprised you weren't half an hour late." Wufei muttered sarcastically, smirking at Duo.

Duo chuckled. "I figured you'll say that so I'm not even gonna bother with an answer." He looked around and then back at the couple. "Where's Mei-chan?"

"In our room." Sally answered with a wary smile. "The hotel offered a baby-sitter... but I think I better go check on her..."

"Oh, c'mon, woman! She's fine. Just try to enjoy yourself for one night!"

"I can go see her." Heero finally spoke, looking up at Sally. By the look on his face, it was obvious that he was desperate to get out of there.

Sally smiled kindly at him. "That's sweet, Heero, but Chang is right. Meiran will be fine."

"I'll just go check to make sure. I'll be back soon. I can run really fast." Heero insisted, his blue eyes desperate. He turned to Duo, his eyes shining with plea. "Ne, Duo-chan? I can run real quick and then come back."

"Heero, you just got here." Duo reminded him, and then reached for his hand again. He smiled at the boy, his face reassuring. "Just relax, it'll be fine!"

"You have nothing to fear, Heero." Quatre spoke up after finally finishing his drink. "You don't have to talk to anyone if you don't want to."

"I don't?"

Sally chuckled. "Of course not! No one is here to force you into anything. People are just glad to see you."

It was then that a high-pitched voice suddenly cut through the air, calling out towards the group:

"Heeeeeeeeeeeerooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Oh oh..." Duo let out, burying his face in his hand and looking away.

Heero turned to look at him, confused. "Who's she?"

He got no answer for the voice was back again, louder and screechier than before:

"Heero! Heero! You're here!"

Heero looked up in the speaker's direction. He frowned as he noticed that it was a young woman, about his age perhaps, running towards him while waving her hands up in the air like an excited chicken. He wasn't so sure who she was, but he already thought that she was weird.

"Oh Heero! You're really here! I can't believe it!" The girl let out in a rush of words, coming to stand in front of Heero, panting from the effort of her run. She smiled broadly at the stunned boy, her large blue eyes sparkling with joy. "I just couldn't believe it when I contacted Duo and he said that you're back again, and I was so surprised that I nearly fell off my chair then and I just couldn't believe it! And now you're here! This is so great! There's SOOOOOO much I want to tell you! C'mon!"

And before Heero could mutter a protest, or squeeze in any word at all, the girl grabbed his arm and dragged him into the crowd.

"Hey!"

He could hear Duo call after them, and when he looked back he could see the braided boy try to run after them, but someone who wanted to have a word with him stopped him. Unable to refuse, Duo began talking to the person, glancing up at Heero from once in a while, until he was out of sight.

Heero swallowed and slowly turned his head back to look at the girl. She was still pulling him with her, chatting none stop about something he didn't quite follow. He looked back over his shoulder, his blue eyes searching desperately for Duo to come and save him...

"... and then they said that if the ceremony would be today then I won't be able to... and she went like 'oh no, that would kill the goldfish!' so I had to... and maybe next year we'll be going back to space in order to settle that contract so I will have to..."

"Anou..." Heero tried to speak between the girl's rush of words, his face a little uncertain.

But the girl just kept chatting on, guiding him through the crowd, not even bothering to look back at him as she dragged him along with her. "I bet she can't even SAY the word! I mean, really, who would listen to a girl who's spent half her life in..."

"Anou ne... ojousan..." Heero tried again, looking a little desperate. "Who are you?"

The girl stopped, her face stunned. She slowly turned to face Heero, her features pale from shock. She smiled at him, a faltering little smile, as if not believing what he said. "Heero, it's me. Don't tell me that you've forgotten all about me! That's ridicules!"

Heero swallowed and bowed his head in shame. "I'm sorry, ojousan, but I don't remember a lot of things..." He looked up at her, smiling apologetically. "I thought Duo-chan told you that..."

"Duo... chan?" The girl let out, baffled. Her eyes suddenly widened and she let out a nervous laughter. "Oh! That's right! He did say something about amnesia! It's so silly of me to have forgotten! I was just so excited when I heard that you were coming, that it completely slipped my mind!" She chuckled again, and squeezed Heero's hand tightly. "Heero, I'm Relena Peacecraft. We're friends."

"Oh." Heero let out, dumbfound. He examined the young woman in front of him, and frowned. "I tried to shoot you, right?"

The girl grinned from ear to ear. "Yes! That's right! See, I knew you wouldn't forget about me! There's just no way that you can possibly forget about us!"

"Us?" Heero mumbled in confusion, his frown deepening.

"Ch! I knew that punk was just trying to pull my chain! I mean, I know he's been, ya know... interested in what's not his in the first place... it's quite disgusting if you think about it..." Relena was now back to her full-force chatter, pulling poor Heero with her again.

The Japanese boy just frowned, not understanding what she was trying to say. The girl just managed to confuse him with her none-stop chatter.

"...when on Earth did he get the idea that he should be the one for you, I don't know! And that silly story about you not remembering me! That was so far fetched I could have seen it a mile away!"

"Re-Relena..." Heero tried to gain her attention, sending nervous glances over his shoulder, his blue eyes begging Duo to appear within the crowd.

"To tell you the truth, this whole mess could have been prevented if you would have taken my offer to stay here with me! It would have saved everybody so much trouble!" Relena carried on with her chatter as she led Heero towards a large and long dining table, which was meant for the guests of honor.

Heero sighed and slumped his shoulders, giving up on the struggle to break free of the girl. Whoever she was, she was probably someone very important to the 'Old Heero'. And if she was so happy to see him, the least he could do was keep his mouth shut so she would not get upset. He knew that if she found out how different he was, she would be all sad and that will ruin her party. After all, she was the one to invite them there. He should at least try to be nice to her...

* * *

"That took some nerve, Relena!" Duo growled the minute he found the two. They were sitting by the large dinner table, Relena's chair at the middle of the long table. Heero was seated to her right, his head bowed and his shoulders slumped. To Relena's left, sat Zechs, who was currently busy talking to Noin who was by his side. There were a few more "guests of honor" by their side. To her right side, next to Heero's chair, were four more chairs, designated for each ex-Gundam pilot. Each seat had a small nametag on it. Duo's eyes narrowed in anger as he saw that the chairs next to Heero was for Trowa and Catherine, the next for Quatre, the other two for Sally and Chang, and the last one, the furthest one, was for him.

Duo snorted and came to sit by Heero's side. No nametag is gonna take him away from Heero. Trowa would just have to forgive him for this one.

"Why, Duo! What a pleasure it is to see you again!" Relena droned sweetly, a smug look on her face. "Having fun?"

Duo rolled his eyes. "Yeah, up until you showed up..." He muttered under his breath. He then decided to ignore Relena completely and turned to Heero. He reached a hand under the table in order to hold Heero's hand. "Are you okay, Hee-chan?"

Heero looked up slowly, sending a nervous glance to the girl sitting next to him. He swallowed and looked back at Duo. "She talks a lot..."

Duo chuckled. "Yeah, well, I'm sorry I couldn't catch up with you two. I became popular all of a sudden..." He reached for the small menu resting on his fancy plate. "Did you order ye--"

"Heero, what looks better to you?" Relena suddenly cut into their conversation, leaning closer to Heero and shoving a small menu in front of his face. She pointed at one of the pages. "This one or this one? I can't decide..."

Heero swallowed, looking down uncertainly at the menu. He looked up at Duo for help.

Duo sighed and shook his head. "Relena, would you leave him alone already!?"

The girl turned her gaze up and glared at him. "I was merely asking a simple question, Duo. Would you be kind enough to mind your own business?!"

"Heero is my business!"

Feeling that he was the cause for all this mess, Heero ducked his head between his shoulders and leaned back in his chair, doing his best to disappear. Relena was still leaning VERY VERY close to him, so close that he could feel her heat and smell her perfume, and it made him extremely uncomfortable. He looked up in surprise when he recognized the scent of her perfume as the same scent he found on the card in the treat basket. He frowned to himself, a little confused.

Did Relena leave him a card? Under his favorite treat? How did she know that he liked it so much? Did she know that the 'Old Heero' liked it a lot? Did she know him so well? Were they really good friends? Like he and Duo-chan? Was she supposed to be important?

He didn't know, he wasn't so sure... He might not be very smart, but he could still add one plus one so it will equal two. The 'Old Heero' and Relena must have been VERY close. He shouldn't be so mean to her and ignore her like he just did...

Relena ignored Duo's intense glare and turned back to Heero. "So, what do you think? Maitre D'Hotel with Beef Teriyaki, or Devilled Kidneys?"

Heero frowned in confusion, having no idea what she had just offered him. He swallowed and looked down at the menu. He took a deep breath, slowly raising his hand to point at the menu. "I think... I think this one." He finally stuttered, his cheeks blushed from embarrassment. He had no idea what he was pointing at and thus felt incredibly stupid. He could not read and there were no pictures, but he figured that he should at least pretend that he was smart so Relena wouldn't be upset.

Relena smirked and Duo gaped at Heero in shock.

"Hee-chan..." He let out, his gaze numb.

Heero turned to look at him, but then Relena leaned even CLOSER to him, resting her hand on his chair, right between his legs. Heero flinched and tensed at that gesture, his cheeks blushing.

Relena smiled at him slyly and gestured at the menu again. "The Maitre? Are you sure?" She asked sweetly, turning her head up to look at him. She was so close, that their lips nearly touched.

"Relena!" Duo growled, getting up quickly, as if ready to pounce her.

For a long time, all Heero could do was stare down at the girl, his blue eyes stunned and his lips slightly parted. He swallowed and forced his head to move- nodding ever so slightly. "A-aa."

Relena's smile broadened and she straightened back in her chair. "Good. Would you like one too?"

Heero sent another uncertain look at the menu and took a deep breath. He nodded his head, looking at Relena with a faltering smile. "A-aa."

"Heero, you won't eat that." Duo's voice came from behind him, sounding very upset.

Relena snorted. She pushed her hair back in a snobbish manner and turned to smirk at Duo. "It's none of your business, Duo-chan." She spoke sweetly, smiling at Duo with mockery in her eyes. "Let Heero decide for himself, okay?"

Duo growled, his glare intensifying.

Heero looked up at him, his eyes apologetic. He was helpless for he had no idea what was the right thing to do in such a tense situation. They were both people who were important to him, or at least he assumed that Relena had to be important. She was very friendly with him, and she merely asked a simple question... why was Duo so mad?

After a few tense moments of glaring at each other, Duo snorted and broke eye contact. He looked down at Heero.

"Heero, you don't want to eat that."

"Don't you tell him what he wants!"

"Shut up Relena!"

"Heero, you're letting him boss you around!"

"Ch! Look who's talking- bitch!"

"Duo-chan..."

"Not now, Heero."

"Duo-chan, you're not being very nice..."

"Neither is she!"

"Oh butt off jackass! Let him eats what he fucking wants!"

"How about you listen to your own advice, princess?! Heero's a VEGETARIAN! He won't eat beef!"

Heero's head jerked up towards Relena, and silence fell over the table.

"Oh." The blonde girl let out, looking a bit startled. She looked up at Heero, who was gaping at her in shock, and frowned. "Since when?"

"SINCE EVER!!!" Duo screamed in a fit of anger, throwing himself back into his chair and punching the table while he was at it.

Heero sighed, looking at Relena with shimmering cobalt eyes. "You... you didn't know that?" He asked quietly, his voice uncertain. "I thought you said you knew me..."

"Of course I do, Heero! We are WELL acquainted. It's just that I..."

"Never bothered to get to know him?" Duo muttered under his breath and crossed his arms over his chest. He glared at the girl.

"That's not true!" Relena protested, her cheeks flushed with humiliation. "It's just been a while. I've forgotten."

Duo snorted and rolled his eyes.

Heero sighed and bowed his head again, looking down at his fidgeting hands. Why was everything so hard for him? Why couldn't he handle a single and simple gathering? He was there for only half an hour and already he was causing trouble. Duo-chan was very angry and upset, and Relena was as well. And it's all because of him and his stupid mistakes. Duo was wrong, he was stupid. So stupid, that he managed to get his friends to fight over something as simple as food. So stupid that he didn't know how to make them stop fighting. He didn't know what to say. He didn't know what to do. How could he know!? He didn't know anything!

Heero sighed sadly and dared a peek up at Duo, from behind his messy bangs. The braided youth was taking a long sip from his glass of wine, looking very pissed. Hurricanes were raging in his violet eyes, and his hands were clutched into fists, gripping the white tablecloth. Up until a few minutes ago Duo was still smiling and enjoying himself. He had ruined Duo's fun and took away his smile.

Heero closed his eyes and turned away from Duo, bowing his head. How he wished that this night would be over...

* * *

Heero looked down at his vegetarian lasagna (the one Duo-chan ordered for him), studying it from all directions. He looked down at the silverware resting by his three sets of plates, and frowned. There were about four sets of forks and knifes at each side of his plate, and to be honest he had no idea which one to choose, or why there were so many of them in the first place. He glanced over at Duo's plate, and frowned when he saw that the braided boy was using just one fork, the one he had been using ever since the first course was served. He looked to his left, at Relena's side, and saw that she had used up most of her forks and was now into the third one. He looked back at his own cutlery, completely lost.

Deciding that it would be too embarrassing to ask what is the right thing to do, Heero reached a hesitant hand to one of the forks.

It was then that Relena slowly got up and used a teaspoon in order to tap on her glass of red wine.

Silence slowly fell over the room, the low rumble of words slowly calming down. Heero turned to look up at Relena, watching her with curious blue eyes. To his right, Duo sighed and rolled his eyes, leaning one elbow on the table and resting his head on it. He looked up at Relena with bored eyes.

Relena smiled sweetly at her audience and took a graceful bow. "Good evening, everyone." She spoke up in her honey-coated voice, her smile never wavering. Heero watched her as she raised her glass of wine, and turned to look at his own glass, a little frown forming on his features.

"I know that you are all anxious to dig into those meals, so I'm going to make this short." Relena continued and a few laughs were heard.

Heero looked up and saw that many people were now reaching for their glasses as well. He looked to his right and saw that the rest of the pilots, except of Duo-chan, were doing the same. He looked back at his glass, deep in thought, and then decided to reach for it as well.

"I would like to propose a toast," Relena carried on, raising her glass even higher. The people in the room did the same. Relena smiled. "For peace."

"For peace!" The crowd echoed, and Heero could hear Duo sigh. The sound of the clanking of glass rang loudly in the large hall. Heero turned to look at Duo and saw him take a small sip of his wine, his violet eyes bitter.

When silence returned, Relena smiled again, putting her glass aside. "And also on this precious opportunity, I would like to invite someone else to say a few words."

Still drinking, Duo rolled his eyes.

Relena turned to look down at Heero, smiling at him sweetly. Heero returned a faltering smile, wondering whom she was talking about. Relena turned back to look at the crowd. "For the last three years he was unable to come, but now I am glad to present him to you. The man who we owe our lifetime of peace, the one who saved us all from the burning wreckage of Libra..."

Duo's eyes widened impossibly.

"Ladies and gentleman, I give you Heero Yuy."

Duo choked on his drink, spitting it out into his glass in an effort to keep breathing.

The sound of applauds filled the room.

And Heero Yuy's face paled dramatically.

He looked up at Relena, blue eyes wide and fearful. "Wa-watashi..?" He stuttered, completely taken by surprise.

"Relena, you must be kidding!" Duo growled, slamming his glass down on the table.

The blonde girl merely shrugged, sitting down gracefully. "It is the appropriate thing to do, don't you agree? After all, Heero is the reason we can all be here today."

"But he ca---" Duo began to protest, but Relena ignored him. She turned to Heero and rested a hand on his lap. She smiled kindly at him.

"Heero, go on, say a few words."

Still pale from shock, Heero could do nothing but gape at Relena. "I... I don't know what to say..." He stuttered, shaking his head and pulling away from Relena's grasp.

"Just stand up and say something. It's not that hard, Heero. You don't have to be a GENIUS in order to do it!"

Heero winced at that remark, bowing his head.

"Heero," Duo spoke up softly, resting his hand on the boy's shoulder. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to."

"Duo, would you let Heero decide on his own! He's not an idiot you know!" Relena growled, glaring at Duo.

That did it. Duo's face paled in horror and his mouth hung wide open. "Wha.. what did you say..?" He whispered in a distressed voice, his hands closing into fists.

"I'm saying that you're treating a great war hero like he's a frigging baby!"

Again Heero winced, bowing his head down even more if humanly possible.

"I..." Duo let out, but his voice died in his throat. "I..."

Relena snorted and turned back to Heero. "Heero, come on, just do it. I know you can. There's no need to be shy."

Heero sighed, feeling everyone's expectant gazes on him. He swallowed and took a deep breath. Slowly, hesitantly, he got up.

Duo's eyes slowly looked up at him, numb and glazed over with shock. "Hee.. Heero..."

The Japanese boy took a shaky breath and raised his head up to look at the crowd. He sent Relena an uncertain look, but the girl just smiled and nodded her head in encouragement, urging him to talk. Heero sighed and looked back at the guests, who were breathlessly awaiting his speech.

"I... uh... Re...Relena said that I have to give a speech..."

Light laughter filled the room, and Heero smiled faintly, mostly out of embarrassment. He did not intent to make a joke.

Taking a deep breath, Heero braced himself and looked up, still searching for words. He swallowed, looking down at Duo for support. The braided boy was still looking at him with stunned eyes, his face pale from shock. Heero sighed and looked back at the crowd.

"Uh... I don't... I don't know a lot about the war..." He began slowly, his voice quiet and hesitant. He shifted his weight from one leg to another, fidgeting in his spot. "I don't really remember anything, but..." He took a deep breath, sending a small glance towards Duo, his cobalt eye shimmering with uncertainty. When he got no reaction from Duo, he sighed and turned back to face the crowd. "But I know that war is bad... and it's wrong, and hard..." He took in a shaky breath, his lower lip trembling. "...So I think... I think that we should be happy that there's... that there's peace now, and we should... we should try to keep it, and..."

He could see everyone look at him like he had just grown another head. All the gazes in the room were locked on him; stunned eyes and mouths gaped in shock, all directed at him. He could actually hear someone mutter, "Where the hell is Heero Yuy?!" as he leaned towards his spouse.

Heero's hands began to tremble and he clenched them into fists, trying to remain in control. But it didn't work. His heart began to pound faster and tears filled his eyes. He could feel his face grow hot as his cheeks reddened in shame. He swallowed and cast his gaze down, taking a deep breath before speaking again, his voice trembling:

"...and I hope that you will..." He managed to mumble between fighting off the tears, doing his best to keep his voice level but failing miserably. He took a deep breath, his fists closing tighter and his gaze down at the floor. "IhopeThatYouWillHaveFunTonightThankYou!" And with that so quickly said, Heero threw himself back into his chair and buried his head in his hands, wishing with all his might that he was nothing but air.

A stunned silence fell over the large ballroom as some guests blinked in confusion, staring at Heero in complete shock.

"Is this some kind of joke?" Someone mumbled and another one laughed.

Even Relena was staring at Heero like she was seeing him for the first time. Her eyes were wide and large with disbelief, her mouth wide open.

Duo was looking down at Heero with tears in his eyes, his heart going out to the boy. The other pilots were also looking at the miserable Japanese boy with eyes that shone with sympathy.

It was after a long while of silence that Sally suddenly began to applaud. Catherine was the second to join in. The rest of the pilots soon followed, except for Duo who was only able to look at them with stunned and tearful eyes. He had one of his hands around Heero's shoulders, in an effort to sooth the boy. He smiled and sniffled at his friends' gesture, and turned to look down at Heero. But the boy would not lift his bowed head, ignoring Duo's light pat on his shoulder.

And then, another small set of applause followed the small group's clapping, and then another and another. Soon after and the whole crowd of people were clapping their hands, filling the ballroom with the sound of applause. Some people even got up to show their respect to the young man, clapping their hands with a smile on their faces.

Duo smiled, wiping away his tears. He looked back at Heero, and patted his back. "Can you hear that, Hee-chan?" He asked softly, a smile on his lips. "They're cheering you."

The Japanese boy sniffled and then slowly straightened in his seat. Tears of embarrassment shone in his dark blue eyes as he looked up at the crowd. He watched them as they applauded him, but he felt empty inside. It didn't matter! Nothing did! They were still looking at him like that! Like they were acting out of pity towards him! Pity towards the poor ex-Gundam pilot who didn't know anything anymore!

Heero sniffled and bowed his head, balling his hands into tight fists. His cheeks still burned with humiliation and his hands were still shaking. His heart pounded strongly against his chest and he could hear it loudly in his ears. He clenched his teeth, biting his lower lip that insisted on trembling. He had been so stupid!

"It's okay, Hee-chan..." Duo's soothing voice whispered in his ear, and he could feel Duo take his hand in his and squeeze it tightly. "You did okay..."

Heero sniffled again and closed his eyes tightly, squeezing out the tears. He shook his bowed head forcefully and a choked whimper escaped his pursed lips. It didn't matter what Duo said! The looks of the people in the crowd said it all. He didn't care what Duo had to say. It was all a big lie. He didn't want to listen anymore! He knew it wasn't true! He didn't want to hear Duo's soothing words or see his sympathetic gaze. He just wanted to be out of there, away from all those people and away from the Old Heero's image that sat so heavily on his shoulder.

He wanted to be smart again... He wanted to know what to say. He wanted to know how to read. He wanted to remember what it's like to be in space and how tall a Gundam is. He wanted to... He wanted... He wanted to be Heero Yuy again!

* * *

"I know what will make you feel better!" Relena spoke up sweetly as the desserts were being served.

Heero raised his head up slowly, his blue eyes still shining with tears. He looked up at Relena in a questioning look.

The girl smiled and got up of her chair. She offered her hand to Heero. "A dance!"

Heero blinked and next to him, Duo snorted.

"Relena, I think you had your fun with him for the day. Just let him eat his ice cream, okay?" He muttered, his violet eyes bitter.

Relena rolled her eyes and waved her hands in a dismissing gesture. "Nonsense! Heero would LOVE to dance, won't you Heero?"

As her gaze was directed back at him, Heero swallowed. "Uh, I don't know, Relena... I'm not very good at--"

"Oh, c'mon! I've seen you dance before, remember? Don't be silly, Heero, of course you can dance!"

"But I don't reme--"

"C'mon, it will make you feel better!" Relena cheered, taking his hand in hers. She pulled him up a little, and having not choice but to comply, Heero sighed and got up.

"Don't you want your ice cream, Heero?" Duo asked, his voice sulky and resentful.

"He'll eat it later, right Heero?" Relena answered for him, but Duo ignored her. He was still looking up at Heero, awaiting the answer. His eyes had the look that suggested that the answer he was waiting to receive would determine the fate of mankind. Like it held the power to effect the world as we know it.

Heero knew that look. It was the look that said that Duo was VERY close to giving up and if you tell him to back off he will. Duo always wore that look when they had a fight, and Heero knew that even if Duo backed off, he would still be very upset and disappointed with him. He hated that feeling. To know that he was allowed to get away with something, but at the same time knowing that he will not be forgiven for it. He would do anything in the world to avoid that feeling, but...

"C'mon, Heero, just one dance! It's been AGES since our last waltz!"

But on the other hand, he had to take in mind that Relena was also there, and she also deserved his attention. She too was a friend. He had to keep her happiness in mind as well. But was she more important than Duo? Were they the same? They obviously didn't like each other, but Heero couldn't see why. He didn't know and he could not make himself understand. He was too stupid for that after all.

Torn in this dilemma, Heero sighed and closed his eyes. He took a deep breath and then slowly opened his eyes again. He looked apologetically at Duo. "Just one dance." He whispered, smiling sadly.

Duo shrugged and turned back to his dessert. "Fine."

Relena grinned. "Great! C'mon! I'll ask them to play a waltz for us!"

And before Heero could squeeze any other word, he was dragged off to the dance floor by an ecstatic Relena. He looked back over his shoulder, seeing that Duo wasn't even looking up at them. He was taking another long sip from his wine and then leaning on the table with one elbow. He looked very tired all of a sudden and Heero's heart was taken over with guilt. He shouldn't have agreed... why couldn't he do ANYTHING right?!

But it was too late now. Relena had guided him to the middle of the dance floor, and was now turning around so they were face to face. She smiled at him and he forced himself to smile back, though on the inside he felt like crying. He tensed a little as she took both his hands in hers and guided them around her waist.

Heero blushed and pulled away.

"Heero? What's wrong?" Relena asked in mild concern, holding his hand in front of her tightly.

Heero sighed sadly and bowed his head. "I... I don't..." He mumbled, turning to look up at her with a lost look in his eyes. He looked down at their joint hands, and then back at Relena. "I don't know how..."

Relena smiled gently, and adjusted her hold on Heero's frail palm. She entwined their fingers in one hand and then guided Heero's other hand to rest on her shoulder. "Don't worry," She began sweetly, wrapping her hands around Heero's slim waist. She looked up into his stunned blue eyes and her smile grew. "I'll lead for a while and then we'll switch, okay?"

Heero took a deep breath and shifted a little in her hold. He was beginning to feel a little uncomfortable. "Uh. . ." He looked up in Duo's direction, looking for his approval or just a comforting gaze, but the braided boy only offered him a displeased glare. Heero sighed and looked away. Duo-chan was still mad at him for being nice to Relena.

He could feel her tighten her hold around his waist and fidgeted uncomfortably. Seeing that there was no way that he could refuse her, Heero offered a small smile and nodded his head. "Okay."

Relena smiled broadly and slowly began to move. Heero watched her feet as she took one step and then another, and slowly began to follow suit. Soon he was able to dance without looking down at their feet, and he looked up at her, smiling for he was able to learn so quickly. Relena smiled back and nodded her head in approval.

For some time they took it nice and slow, dancing quietly, just looking at each other. But then Relena's movements began to change. She inched closer to Heero, her hold on his slender waist tightening. Her hands began to slowly and seductively brush over his lower back, and one hand slowly climbed upward, her fingers beginning to tease the short hairs at the nape of his neck.

Beginning to feel a little more awkward, Heero fidgeted and tried to move his head from her grasp. But Relena only chuckled, as if amused by his actions, and pressed her body closer to him. Heero gulped as he felt his groin rub against her, and his cheeks were slowly colored in red. Relena began to slowly rock her hips against his, using her arms to pull him closer to her. He was so close that he could feel her breasts pressed against his body, and he looked away, feeling his face grow hot from embarrassment.

Relena chuckled, shaking her head in amusement. She leaned her head forward, nearly resting her chin on his shoulder as she turned to whisper in his ear. "Do you like that, Hee~ro?"

He could feel a shudder run through his entire body as the soft rush of air brushed over the sensitive flesh of his ear. He took in a shaky breath, and somehow managed to weakly shake his head. "Re-Relena..."

The girl chuckled and pulled him even closer so there was no more space left between them. Heero swallowed, his mouth dry, as he felt her rub her hips against his groin, over and over again. Her movements were slow and her body was warm, and it caused a feeling that he did not know to spread all over his body, starting from his groin and moving upwards. His lips slowly parted and his eyes were now half-lidded. Unknowingly, he began to lean more heavily on her, coming closer to her teasing warmth and her sweet perfume. And then, another feeling, both alien and disturbingly familiar to him. He felt himself begin to harden.

A wicked smirk appeared on Relena's face. She leaned her head closer to him so she could whisper in his ear. "Are we getting a little excited, Heero?" She droned, her voice dripping of smugness and seduction.

Heero blushed even more and bowed his head, concentrating on looking down at his feet. "I... I... G-gomen, Re--Relena... I... I don't... It does it all on its own..."

"It's okay, Heero." She whispered in a sluty voice, her hands trailing up and down his body. "I always knew that you would be so... big."

Heero blushed a few more shades of red. "I'm as bi--- uh, I'm as old as you are, Re--Relena..." He sucked in a quick breath, doing his best to distance himself from her.

Relena let out a playful chuckle, leaning down to flicker his earlobe with her tongue. "That's not what I mean, silly boy..."

"Oh." Heero sniffled, looking away in embarrassment. "I... I'm sorry, Relena. I'm not very smart sometimes..."

"That's okay, Heero. I understand." Relena assured him with a smile. Her hands began to trail lower, her fingers turning in small circles around his lower back. Heero tensed even more, beginning to look a little distressed. Relena ignored his nervous cobalt eyes and allowed her hands to descend even lower. "Just... try to enjoy yourself tonight..."

Heero forced himself to swallow and nodded his head weakly. "A-aa." He felt her hands come lower and lower, as she rubbed her hips against his in slow and seductive motions. He sucked in a sharp breath as he felt himself slowly harden. His eyes slowly closed and he was now looking at her though half-lidded eyes, his trembling hands closing tighter around her shoulders. He began to unconsciously move his hips to meet hers; his lips slightly parted as his breath came in and out in short and slow gasps.

Suddenly, Relena grabbed his ass and Heero jumped up, frightened.

His eyes flew wide-open, cobalt pools washed over with fear and distress. His mind blacked out, like a short circuit, and the world went black before his eyes. There was no sound nor feeling or movement, only the knowledge of His Hands waiting somewhere in the Dark. He wanted to be Inside him!

"DON'T TOUCH ME LIKE THAT!!!!!" Heero screamed in complete panic, pushing Relena away with all his might.

The girl was thrown back forcefully, staggering from side to side as she lost balance.

The orchestra stopped playing and all the dancers were now staring at the couple in the middle of the dance floor. Heero was panting in fear and exertion, his wild cobalt eyes giving him the look of a fear stricken animal. Relena was standing a few steps away from him, looking at him in complete shock, her features pale.

She was the first to register all the pair of eyes gawking at them, and her features quickly turned from shock to humiliation, then anger. She shifted her gaze back to Heero, her blue eyes burning with an angry fire.

"How dare you!" She spat, glaring at him. "YOU IDIOT! What are you- STUPID?! Do you have any idea what you just did?! HOW DARE YOU!?!?!?"

Heero flinched, clearly hurt by her words.

In the back of the room, by the longest table, Duo slowly got up, his glare dangerous and his face ominous.

"I... I don't..." Heero stammered, finding it hard to speak under all the harsh gazes directed at him. "I don't want you to touch me." He breathed out, feeling very small and helpless under her harsh gaze. "I don't like it."

A few gasps were heard from between the crowd of spectators, and Relena's eyes widened with insult and mortification. Her shoulders tensed and her hands clenched into fists. She was clenching her teeth as if restraining herself from either crying or shouting.

Heero looked down at her in dreadful anticipation, knowing that he had humiliated her in front of everybody. His blue eyes shone in apology and he offered her a faltering and weak little smile. "I'm sorry, Rele---"

SMACK!

And even before he managed to finish his sentence, a loud SMACK! echoed throughout the ballroom and suddenly his cheek was burning in pain. Heero's head was flung aside from the force of the slap, and he immediately raised his hand up to shield his throbbing cheek.

Duo's eyes widened in anger. He pushed his chair aside and strode towards the dance floor.

More stunned gasps filled the air as Relena retreated. She took a stand in front of the stunned boy, glaring at him with all she was worth. Her angry blue eyes were shooting lightning at him, mocking him and glaring at him in contempt.

"You fucking bastard!" She growled, her fists still clenched.

Heero was unable to respond. He merely stood there, in the middle of the dance floor, holding his throbbing cheek. His eyes were wide and glazed over with shock, and he was gaping numbly at Relena.

SMACK!

Another loud slap and everyone's gazes were turned from Heero, to Relena. They widened in surprise as they saw the tall braided boy standing by the princess, glaring at her with fierce violet eyes.

The tense moment stretched on and on for what seemed like forever, and then, just like that, Heero whirled around and ran out of the ballroom. He pushed his way forcefully through the crowd, still holding his aching cheek as tears leaked out of his tearful blue eyes. The small droplets were blown by the wind caused by his run and got caught in his unruly dark hair.

Duo was the next to leave, storming out of the ballroom with hatred in his eyes.

* * *

"Duo!" Quatre called as he ran towards Duo's old car, a worried look on his face. The braided boy was currently throwing his and Heero's bags into the trunk, a grim and solemn look on his face. Heero was waiting inside the car, sitting on the passenger's seat with his head bowed and his hands in his lap. "Duo, wait!"

Duo slammed the trunk shut and stalked towards the driver's seat, pushing Quatre aside as the blond boy tried to approach him. He opened the door.

"Duo!" Quatre begged, his voice desperate. "Duo, don't leave!"

Duo slammed the door shut and whirled around to glare at Quatre. "It's just a big joke to you all- isn't it?!" He shouted, his bitter violet eyes shining under the pale moonlight. "Lets invite everyone and have a great party! Everything will be all nice and neat, won't it!? Well guess what, Q-man, everything ISN'T so nice and neat! It just isn't!"

"Duo..." Quatre whispered, shocked by the braided boy's outburst.

Duo cursed and turned to face the car. He stopped himself though, closing his eyes tight and then kicking the car forcefully. He whirled back to Quatre, his gaze accusing. "It was SO hard to convince him to come! It was so hard to make him see that he is NOT stupid! It was so hard, Quatre! Do you have ANY idea how much he was looking forward to meet you guys!? Do you know how hard he tries to do the right thing?! And that BITCH! She just goes right ahead and uses him like that! And what do people do!? They stand there and just watch and laugh! Fucking bastards!" Duo spat, kicking a pile of snow. "So why should we stay, huh Quatre!? Why should we!?"

"You're right, Duo. People don't understand. They cannot accept someone who's different from them. But we're not like everybody else, Duo. We do care. We do understand." Quatre spoke softly, his eyes begging him to understand.

Duo sighed, slowly calming down. He bowed his head down sadly, his shoulder slumped. "I'm sorry, Q-man, but Heero was right. We shouldn't have come here."

"Then at least let us say goodbye." Trowa's voice suddenly came from up ahead, and both Duo and Quatre looked up in surprise. Duo's eyes widened as he saw Sally, Wufei, Trowa and Catherine were all walking towards the car. A small smile crept to his lips.

"You left the ball?!"

Catherine smiled gently and came to offer Duo a hug. "Of course we did, Duo. That's what friends do."

Duo's smile broadened by a little bit. He looked up at Wufei in question. "And Relena?"

Wufei snorted and rolled his eyes. "Lets just say that we'll have to keep away from security for a while..."

Duo chuckled. "Thanks you guys..."

"So, are you leaving?" Sally asked, her blue eyes worried.

Duo sighed and nodded his head. "Yeah, I don't want to stay here a minute longer."

"Will Heero be okay?" Trowa asked, gesturing at the car.

Duo sighed. "He's very upset."

"Will it be okay if we said goodbye to him?" Catherine asked, her eyes shimmering. "And apologize for being so rude last night..."

Duo smiled weakly. "Well, you can try..." He looked over his shoulder, at the car, and saw that Heero was looking at them from behind the window. He gestured the boy to come out. Heero hesitated for a while, but then sighed and exited the vehicle. He remained standing by his open door, looking very uncertain of himself.

Duo watched with a smile as each one of the group offered the startled Heero a warm hug and wished him well. A warm feeling filled his heart as he saw Heero respond well to the friendly gestures, and even hug back. They all said their goodbyes and then Duo and Heero entered the car.

"Drive safely, you hear?" Cathy told them, bending down in front of Duo's window. "It's a dangerous road at night."

Duo nodded. "I will."

"Try not to get lost." Wufei snorted from somewhere behind and Duo chuckled.

Quatre also came to his window, offering a smile. "Keep in touch, Duo. Call me if you need ANYTHING, even if it's just talking. I'll gladly listen."

Duo smiled and nodded his head. "Thanks, Q-man."

Quatre smiled kindly and looked up at Heero. "You too, Heero. I will be happy to hear from you as well. Maybe we can get together sometime, the whole groups. Just us, no outsiders. What do you say?"

Heero smiled weakly and nodded his head. "Okay."

"Take care you two." Quatre wished them and then slowly backed away from the car. Duo started the engine and the two drove off, seeing the group wave their hands goodbye as they slowly pulled out of the hotel's driveway.

* * *

Since it was late and Duo was too tired to drive all the way home (not to mention that he had spent the last few hours drinking wine), he decided to stop at a nice and humble little inn, only a dozen km from the Mt. Hermon Hotel. The inn was located by the highway, so it was the obvious choice. Unfortunately for them, the inn had only one room left, and it only had a single bed in it. Duo wasn't up to climb back into the car and drive, so he agreed to take the room. It was far from the fancy suite they slept in the other night, but as long as it was warm and there was a bed to sleep on, it was good.

The mattress moved as Duo snuggled closer to the boy lying next to him, drawing the blanket as high as his neck, seeking more warmth. He was already half asleep, his messy long bangs obscuring his eyes. He had one hand around Heero and the other lying between them. It was a small bed, so there wasn't much room, but if there was one thing he liked in the whole damn world, it was to sleep by Heero's side. There was nothing that could ease his sleep more than gathering the beautiful boy into his arms, feel the heat of his body agsint his own flesh. Heero fit just perfectly into his arms. Sometimes he lost touch on where he ended and Heero began, for when they lay cuddled together, it was like they were one.

Duo could sleep like this forever. He sighed pleasantly and nuzzled his face in his pillow. He could hear Heero sigh as well, and he opened one sleepy eye to look at the boy. He frowned when he saw that Heero was wide-awake, staring at the ceiling, looking deep in thought.

Duo opened his eyes completely and propped himself up on one elbow. "A penny for your thoughts." He whispered in the dark, looking down at Heero with shining violet eyes.

Heero sighed, closing his eyes sadly. For a few moments, he remained silent, but then he slowly opened his eyes and turned to face Duo. "I was just thinking... about the war."

Duo frowned. "The war? Why would you think about that?"

Heero sighed and looked away. "I was thinking, that I probably killed a lot of people..." He turned back to Duo, his gaze wretched. "Did I kill people, Duo-chan?"

Stunned by the question, Duo could do nothing but stare at Heero in shock. His violet eyes slowly filled with tears and he took a deep breath, looking away. ". . . . . yes, Heero. You did."

Heero sighed and closed his eyes sadly. He sniffled. "Souka..."

Duo sighed as well, and turned to look back at Heero. He reached for his hand and held it tightly. "We all killed people, Heero. That's war."

"We killed to get peace?" Heero asked, his blue eyes shimmering in the dark. "Is that why we killed?"

Duo did not answer and merely looked down at Heero with haunted amethyst eyes.

Heero sniffled, squeezing Duo's hand gently. "But we... I... I only killed the bad guys, right? They were all bad, right?"

Duo sighed deeply and looked away. "They were the enemy, yes."

"But it doesn't mean that they were bad."

"No, it doesn't."

Again Heero sniffled, his face becoming distressed. "D-did I... Did I kill a lot of people?"

" . . . . . ."

"Maybe... maybe that's why I'm like this now? Because I killed a lot?"

At that, Duo gasped and a choked whimper escaped his lips. He whirled back to look at Heero, his tearful eyes compassionate. "No, Hee-chan." He whispered, his voice heavy from tears. "That's not the reason."

"B-but you... you get punished when you kill people." Heero insisted, wanting to make sense of everything that has happened to him. He wanted to know. He wanted to understand. He wanted a reason for why he was this stupid. "They said... on the news... someone went to jail because he killed someone."

Duo sighed and reached down a hand to push Heero's bangs out of his eyes. "It's different in a war. We don't get punished for it... It's... it's different."

"But we still killed someone. Maybe I just killed too much... ne?" Heero still insisted, certain that he had found the reason for his condition.

More tears flooded Duo's eyes and his fists clenched around the sheets. He forced himself to look away from those pleading cobalt eyes.

"Ne? Maybe I killed someone who was good, and I got punished? Maybe I wasn't supposed to be okay after the war? Ne, Duo-chan? Do you think so?"

Duo closed his eyes, taking a few moments to compose himself. He turned back to Heero, and petted his hair. "No, Heero, I don't."

"Oh." The boy let out, looking away thoughtfully. His eyes shimmered with unshed tears, and a few escaped his eyes and slid down his pale cheeks. He sniffled and closed his eyes sadly. "I'm sorry, Duo-chan. I said something stupid again, ne?" He turned to look at Duo, his tearful cobalt eyes shimmering with sorrow. "I'm sorry..."

Duo sighed deeply and reached down to wipe Heero's tears. "No, Heero, that's not it. You didn't say anything stupid. It's just that..." He sighed, searching for words. "It's just that no one deserves what that bastard did to you, Hee-chan... You're not a bad person, Heero. You never were."

"Then why did he make me so stupid?"

Duo's heart clenched painfully and he sucked in a deep breath. He looked down into Heero's eyes, his own gaze fierce and determined. "Heero, you are not stupid. Do you hear me? You. Are. NOT. Stupid. I don't know why he did it, and I can't offer you any explanations, but I can tell you that he did not make you stupid. Don't you think for one moment that what happened today was your fault. It wasn't. It's Relena who's stupid, not you. It's those people at the ball who were wrong, not you. You never did anything wrong, Heero. I want you to know that. You did nothing wrong."

"But..." Heero tried to protest, so hung up on the belief that he was the one at fault. "But the 'Old Heero' would never..."

"Heero, there's no 'Old Heero' and 'New Heero'. There's you. Just you. The one I love."

Heero's eyes widened and he gasped. "Lo... love?"

Duo smiled, happy to be finally able to get it out into the open. "Yes, Heero, love. I've always loved you, and I still do. I love you for everything that you are. You're my light, remember? That will never change, Heero. Do you understand?"

Heero smiled joyfully, his cobalt eyes dancing. "H-hai."

Duo smiled back and petted the boy's cheek, wiping the last of his tears away. "Good." He stated, lying down again. "So I don't wanna hear anymore of this 'I'm stupid' crap, okay?"

Heero's smile broadened and he hurried to nod his head. "Hai." He settled himself back into the covers, his heart beating fast and a wide grin on his face.

Love... Duo-chan loved him... He didn't care that he wasn't like the 'Old Heero'... He said that they were the same... He loved him... he loved him...

Heero turned to look at Duo when he felt the bed move, as the braided boy settled himself more comfortably into the covers. He smiled to himself and turned to lie on his side, wrapping his arms around Duo. He snuggled closer to him, nuzzling his face in the crook between Duo's neck and chest. He sighed in content as he felt Duo pull him into a tight embrace.

No... he wasn't stupid... He wasn't stupid at all. He wasn't stupid, because he knew love. He knew how to love and he knew love in return. It was the greatest thing anyone could ever know [ii], and he knew it. He wasn't stupid at all.

Satisfied with this revelation, Heero closed his eyes and prepared to go to sleep. He allowed himself to slowly be swept away into Duo's warmth, until all of a sudden, a realization struck him. He opened his eyes widely and turned his head up to look at Duo.

The braided boy seemed to be already deep asleep.

"Ne. . . . Duo-chan?" Heero whispered, careful not to wake Duo, though that was what he was trying to do.

"Mumm..?" Duo mumbled sleepily, tightening his hold on the boy.

Heero smiled apologetically and bowed his head as if in shame. "I forgot Yoshi in the car."

Duo sighed and snuggled more closely to the Japanese boy. "Heero, there's a frigging blizzard outside." He mumbled sleepily, burying his face in Heero's dark and sweet hair. "Tomorrow. . ."

Heero pouted, turning to look at Duo with big ol' puppy eyes. "But it's cold in the car..."

Duo sighed and opened his eyes. One look into those big pleading pools of cobalt blue, and Duo sighed, throwing the blanket aside. "Fine, fine... I'll go get him."

Heero smiled and Duo shook his head with a sigh, getting up to put his shoes on. He grabbed his jacket and prepared to head into the blizzard. "Ch. The things I do for you..." He muttered, opening the door. He turned to look over his shoulder, seeing Heero already snuggling back into the warm covers. He smiled. "Heero Yuy- the light of my life..."

Part 7.

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