Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Do I know thee whom I call... love? ❯ Pillow Talk ( Chapter 6 )

Warnings: Lemon? Yeah… finally the first real lemon of this story. Rape and the usual angst.

Thank you all so much for your reviews, I hope you still like the story once you finish reading this… and please, write more! I just need to know what you think…

 

Pillow Talk…

 

I woke up this night to the sound of screaming. Strangely enough it was not my own. My heart clenches when I realize that Trowa must be having another nightmare. It's been a while since he had his last one… but they always come back to haunt him sooner or latter.

 

I tell him not to be ashamed of them, we all have nightmares, but he doesn't listen to me. He thinks of himself as weak and tries to hide them as often as possible. Thankfully, after teen years, I got very good at “Trowa reading” so I usually know when they're coming.

 

I did not see this one though, and it must be pretty bad to have him screaming, he usually just moans and whines softly. I reach forward and touch his shoulder gently, “Trowa? Trowa love, wake up…” I murmur softly not to start him even further.

 

“Wake up Trowa it's just a nightmare…” He stops trashing and opens his eyes slowly, he looks at me and after while he realizes he'd been screaming, he snaps his mouth shut. Then he starts to say something but I hear nothing as his arms hug me tightly almost crushing me against him.

 

“Shh… It's alright love, I'm here for you” I soothe him as best as I can returning the hug as I start to rock us gently. He seems to like this as he always rocks me after a pain attack and I've developed a liking to it as well. His muscles start to relax and he takes a deep breath.

 

“Want to talk about it…?” I ask.

 

He shakes his head and we are quiet for a long time after that, then he seems to think better of it, “It… it was them again…” He whispers shakily and I know he's talking about his childhood, back to the times when he was still a mercenary child, nothing but a victim among dozens of rapists. I nod and he starts crying softly, clinging to me as if for life.

 

“They had me tied down and blinded…” he shivered. He is terrified of blinds, even during the wars. He almost lost it once when an OZ soldier tried to blind him, the soldier was dead before he ever knew what had hit him.

 

“Then they were arguing about gags… until one of them said I would be more… useful if they were free to… enjoy my mouth…” I tried to swallow but the lump on my throat was growing bigger and bigger, I wanted to throw up… I wanted to go back in time and kill each and every one of those man in a very painful way just to spare my Trowa from having to do it himself latter…

 

He kept talking and I almost asked him to stop, “That was when I felt their hands all over me… their filthy tongues, kissing, sucking, biting… I tried to get away but they hit me… I was so little… and then the pain of their cocks invading me… one after the other… they were so big… too big… I cried and I cried… I was raw and bleeding… and that's when they shoved their cocks on my mouth to keep me quiet… I couldn't take it… they were all around me… laughing and coming” he sobbed and I could feel his tears soaking my bare shoulder, “I was so little…” he whispered brokenly.

 

Oh Gods… how many times had he gone through this? How many nights had we spent this way? Him, crying desperately trying to wash those horrid memories from his mind and I, unable to do anything but hold him and tell him those times were over…

 

“It's over now love… their dead… all of them… they can't hurt you anymore… I'm here… I'm here for you…” I assure him, and then I feel nimble finger searching for the pattern on my back he'd grown so found of. I realized it soothed him, that mark; and he found it without looking and started to follow the pattern with his fingers, carefully tracing the lines without ever faltering.

 

It had become an evidence for him, a palpable proof of our love. I first did it on impulse, I was so in love with him, I wanted him so that I needed to carry his mark with me… something else then his seed inside my body every time we made love… so I had it done, and now it had become an icon, a sign… and he loved it… I had lost count of how many times he had thanked me for having it done… the clown mask I had marking my back, the sign that in a way, marked me forever as his…

 

He caressed it for a while until he was feeling calm enough to ask me shyly, “Wufei… make love to me?”

 

It did not surprise me, this request of his, in a way I had grown to expect his plea of reassurance after a nightmare. I nodded and kissed him softly, slowly working the kiss to turn into something more promising.

 

He melted in my arms and I started worshiping his body bit by bit. I kissed his jaw and left a trail of wet kisses until I met his ear and started devotedly sucking a lobe, I nibbled on it and he moaned.

 

I licked his pale neck and with my hands worked teasingly on his nipples, one at a time making them hard for my tongue when I started sucking on them. I worked his nipple ring with my tongue making it shine sinfully with cooling wetness.

 

I held his round ass in my hands and squeezed gently and he held his breath as I dipped my tongue in his navel, licking his taut stomach until I found my prize, hard and glistening and crowned by an auburn ring of soft pubic hair.

 

I went straight past it to caress his sensitive thighs and he moaned again, he had yet to stop crying and his sobs were making his breathing harder and more ragged then it should be, but I knew this was also part of the process.

 

“Wufei… please…” he begged.

 

I obliged, this was not time to push him, I was here to reassure him, to make him mine again, to clean him from those phantom hands and tongues from those invading cocks and cruel bites.

 

I took him in my mouth and he sighed, we froze for a moment enjoying the pleasure, then I started working him in earnest. I licked him from base to tip a few times and then covered him whole again. His cock is huge and I have some trouble making it fit my mouth, the tip brushing dangerously and teasing my gag reflex but I adjusted and started sucking him devotedly.

 

That's when he loses it and starts moaning loudly, his hips buckling on the bed and almost making me choke, but I hold him still until I have him almost on the edge. That's when I release him.

 

He protests half heartedly as he knows what's to come, my hands go for the lube under the pillow and I kiss him passionately, never leaving his lips as I struggle to uncap the bottle and turn him to better work a finger inside his small passage.

 

This is the tricky part, when his freshly relived memories might come tumbling down and crush whatever pleasure I managed to give him. I kiss him again and again whispering sweet words as my probing fingers find his delicate entrance. I insert one digit carefully and hold still, waiting for his reaction, he just moans pleasurably and I feel encouraged.

 

After a while a second and third finger come in as well, carefully stretching and searching for that precious little bud of pleasure that can make things so much easier. I almost lose him to his ghosts twice before I brush it and then he's mine again.

 

He's panting heavily and I listen to his desperate whispers as I smear my cock with lube, “Please Wufei… oh please… I need you inside me love… please… take me”

 

I smile at him and knelling on the bed I carefully take him in my arms. I can never be inside him without looking him in the eye. I need to see his face while I do it, and I think he appreciates it as well as I imagine none of his rapist cared enough to want to see his face.

 

I brush his bangs aside and position him over me, carefully I guide my straining erection to enter him. Carefully, carefully and painfully slow until I am fully sheathed inside him. I take a moment to savor our reversed positions, I don't top him very often, he has too many memories and I'd rather be the bottom, it fits us best. I love the feeling of him inside me and I think that by topping me he justifies his protectiveness towards me. I'm his uke after all...

 

After a moment he nods and I know he's ready so I start my pumping with a few shallow thrusts. The position we are in still leaves me in a submissive position as I don't have much freedom of movement. It's up to him to set the pace.

 

Soon enough I feel his need building and he starts meeting my thrusts viciously, the angle hitting his prostate again and again. The slapping of flesh against flesh and the wet sounds of my member diving his channel is utterly erotic and I start approaching the edge myself. My moans join his and our voices rise in a sinful symphony.

 

Suddenly his heated cave tightens around me and I feel his hot seed washing my stomach, I'm impressed I lasted more than him but not long though and soon I'm jerking inside my lover, the come making my thrusts easier and slippery as I pump a last few times inside of him.

 

I lay him in bed carefully before passing out sprawled over him. I wake up some time latter only to feel him pushing me closer to his chest. We lay awake for a while, the waves a pleasure not yet totally gone. “Thank you…” he says as I lay my head on his shoulder, tangling our legs together and losing myself on his heartbeat.

 

“You're welcome…” I answer, not quite feeling the lazy hands trailing a familiar pattern on my back.

 

TBC