Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Gundam Wing: And The Old Hag ❯ Chapter 4 ( Chapter 4 )

Part IV of:

Gundam Wing and The Old Hag

Last time the boys met the brother of the all knowing all doing Taco and the all doing Dragon…he was a monster…^-^`` Well and they were headed out the door of the monsters cave, for the castle of OOOF, note: they haven't left yet…

Duo: Can we leave now…

Monster: Of Course! But before you do take this! **Throws a pill at Duo**

Duo: **Catches and reads the writing on the side of it** Use in case of emergency…Too late…

All: **Snigger**

The monster's brothers walk in along with Freakazoid…

Freakazoid: GUYS! WOOO! Look It's Heero!! Man Am I glad to see you again **Looks around and whispers** Well, frankly That Taco Guy is really weird…

Wufei: Look who talken`

Duo: **Smiles** Heh-heh…

Taco: HELLO ALL!

Dragon: HI!

Monster: BROTHERS!

All: ?-?

The Monster, Taco and Dragon talk for a minute then turn to the boys…

Monster: Well…

Taco: Bon-

Dragon: Voy-

Monster: Adge-

Freakazoid: BYE!!!!!!!!!

Announcer Guy: Suddenly the animator had a fatal Heart attack…

(The Animator is seen drawing the monster, taco, and dragon-then yells, the chair falls backwards, with his feet stuck up in the air…The Monster, Taco, and Dragon disappear. Freakazoid shrugs and walks away…)

All: …**All walk out…**

Duo: Remind me to sue Taco Bell…

All: …

~20 minutes later~

Quatre: …well…

Trowa: **sigh**

Duo: **Trips over a rock and hits a guy in the face…who is an old guy…standing in front of a bridge** GAHH!!

Wufei: YIY!

Old Guy: Who are you?

Heero: **sweat-drops** Umm…**Picks up Duo** I…am Heero from Camelot…

Old Guy: Well…if you want to cross, you'll have to answer 3 questions! If you answer one wrong you're cast into the pit of hot things!

Heero: What kind of name is that?

Old Guy: Well…don't ask me…ask the producer!

Duo: Just ask the questions!

Old Guy: Ok…who wants to go first?

Milliardo: …ok…what are they?

Old Guy: Well…For one…Who are you?

Duo: **Looks over the ledge on the cliff which the bridge is over sees a landing bag and nods at Milliardo**

Milliardo: Milliardo Peacecraft…

Old Guy: What is you looken` for?

Milliardo: The Old hag…

Old Guy: Well what's your favorite Gundam?

Milliardo: My own, of course…

Old Guy: …Ok…Off you go…

Milliardo: …Ok…thanks…**walks across bridge**

Duo: Well…that seemed easy enough…**walks up**

Old Guy: Who are you?

Duo: Duo Maxwell…

Old Guy: You lookin` for somethin`?

Duo: Yeah…

Old Guy: What is it?

Duo: My left shoe, I can't find it anywhere…

Old Guy: Really! Me Too! Go on across!

Duo: …-k-…

Quatre: …Well, I guess I'll go next…

Old Guy: What do you want?

Quatre: To cross the bridge!

Old Guy: {Censored} It I just wasted a question didn't I?

Quatre: Yes you did!

Old Guy: ARGG!!! I did it again! Well…What's your name?

Quatre: Quatre Rabarba Winner!

Old Guy: …Go on across…

Quatre: **thinking-Sucker…**

Heero: I'm next…

Old Guy: Well, Who are you?

Heero: I am Heero Yuy…

Old Guy: What's a famous quote of yours?

Heero: I'm gonna kill you…

Old Guy: Well, now…what's the air speed velocity of a Toucan?

Heero: An African or European Toucan?

Old Guy: Well…I don't know that…**BONG!!**

The old Guy is tossed into the pit of hot things…

Trowa: How do you know so much about Toucans?

Heero: Read the first episode…

Trowa: Oh! **Pulls out the episode one and reads**

**they start to walk across the bridge**

~~INTERMISSION~~

Duo: Is that all for today?

Author: No sorry…you still have to do the rest of the story…

Duo: {censored}…

Wufei: **Sigh**

Milliardo: That last scene was strange…

All: ¬.¬``

Trowa: **reading the first episode** OH! So that's how!!

Heero: Yeah…

Author: …ok…Places everybody!

Everyone walks to the places where they begin…

Author: Ok and roll the title…

~~INERMISSION IS OVER~~

Author: Ok and action!

All the Gundam pilots walk over to a large body of water…the ocean…ok for those specific people out there…that Atlantic Ocean…

Duo: {censored} It, now how are we gonna get across this thing…

Wufei: Beats me…

Quatre: We can't swim to America…

Milliardo: We could use the Gundams…

Trowa: No…they haven't been in the story line…it wouldn't make sense…

Heero: Well…**thinks** HEY! Duo, where is that pill…thing?

Duo: Right here…*pulls a yellow pill out of pocket** Why?

Quatre: Read the rest of the instructions…may be it'll tell ya something…

Duo: Just add water…Well…there's lots of that here! **throws it in the water**

Suddenly the small yellow pill grows into an enormous Yellow Submarine…

Quatre: HEY! COOL BEANS! **Gets in**

Duo: WOOO!! Let's go! **Jumps in**

Everyone else: OK! **Gets in**

Duo: Can I be the captain?!

Heero: No…

Duo: But he gave me the pill…

Heero: Fine…

Duo: Ready to launch! WOOO!! **Pushes a big red button and the ship begins to go under water**

Wufei: **looks out window and sees 6 fish with human heads congregating** @_@

Fish#1: Good Morning!

Fish#2: Morning!

Fish#3: How are things?

Fish#4: Good! And you?

Fish#3: Great! Morning up there!

Fish#5: Hello! Nice day?

Fish#6: Great! Never better!

Fish#4: OH {CENSORED}! Its Mr. Fishy-Cruso!

Fish#1: Yipe! **swims off**

All the fish swim off…And a huge fish comes and eats a lot of sea weed…followed by a course of small fish, then some large fish, then a whale…a small fish in a black suit comes up and offers Mr. Fishy-Cruso a mint

Waiter-Fish: A mint for you sir?

Mr. Fishy-Cruso: I can't eat another bite…

Waiter-Fish: But sir it is only a small mint…what do think will happen…you won't explode…*smiles*

Mr. Fishy-Cruso: FINE!! But only one…

The waiter-fish puts the mint in Mr. Fishy-Cruso's mouth…He explodes…¬-¬``

-BOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM-

Wufei: This is a messed up country…

(That last line was not to offend the people of England…^-^``)

Trowa: When did you figure that out?

A whale swims in front of the sub…

Duo: YOU {CENSORED} WHALE! GET OUT OF MY {CENSORED} WAY!!

Whale: Well, I never…**Swims away**

Quatre: …Duo…I think you're taking it a little too far…

Duo: Oh…well…heh-heh…

Wufei: @_@

Duo: Somethin` wrong Wufei?

Wufei: Oh…**Gelp**…nothing, nothing…**blink-blink**

All: …whatever…

A small black shoe flies across the side of the sub and Milliardo is the only one to spot it…

Milliardo: …What the {censored}…

Duo: **sees it…** HEY! IT'S MY SHOE!! **Opens the hanger of the sub…everyone tries to stop him…on account that the ship would sink, but surprisingly no water comes in…two of the Beatles do…Paul and John…**

Wufei: This just isn't my day…first talking fish with human heads…now dead people…

All: TALKING FISH??!!

Wufei: …don't ask…

Duo: Don't worry, I won't…

Heero: And dead people?

Trowa: This isn't going to be one of those 'The 6th Sense' things, is it?

Heero: …lay off the movies Trowa…

Duo: What do you mean by dead people?

Wufei: …John Lennon, you Baka…**Points at John**

John: **waves**

Paul: Is this yours? **Holds up a black left shoe**

Duo: That's mine!! **grabs it, and puts it on**

John: Yeah, we were in our Yellow Sub across the way and saw it…you all ok?

Duo: Well…ya see, we need to get to America…assuming that's where the old hag is…and, well, I dunno how to get there…

Heero: YOU STUPID BAKA!! I KNEW I SHOULDA` BEEN CAPTAIN!!!

Duo: Well, I…

John: No problem! We know the way! Just fallow us!!

Paul: Yeah that's where we're headed too. Gorge and Ringo are in our sub over there…**points out window to a much smaller yellow sub…**

John: Oh and before we go! **Hands Duo a CD Titled: 'The Beatles 1'** You have to play the song: Yellow Submarine the whole time…

Duo: YEAH!!! I LOVE THAT SONG!!

Paul: You a fan?
Duo: You betcha!!

Quatre: I'm a fan myself!

John: It looks as if we have a whole sub full of fans!

Wufei: Not quit…

Duo: You don't like the Beatles??!!

Wufei: NO! I do! Big fan…but um…¬-¬``**Points at Heero, Trowa and Milliardo, Who are face faulting**

John & Paul look at each other and then back at the 3 stooges who are face faulting…

John: Ok…that's fine…for now…

Paul: You still have to listen to the CD though…and when we get to America, you're listening to the whole thing…

Milliardo,Trowa&Heero: GAHHHHHHH

John: 5 times!

Duo: **falls out of the captain's chair he's laughing so hard**

Quatre: HA-HA!

Wufei: Now that's what I call Justice!

~~END…Of scene…uh…I lost count…~~

Everyone gets out of the sub and walk off the set.

Duo: WOOO!! **Is listening to the 'Beatles 1' on head phones**

Paul: Oi…

John: Well, when do we get paid?

Paul: This is for charity…we pay them, remember?

Ringo: how much is that bill again?

Gorge: Um…I don't remember…

Paul: lets hope its not too much…

Author: Its $25 from each of you!

John: That's not bad at all!

Author: Just enough to pay for the idiotic scene coming up!

John: You need $100 just for the next scene??!!

Duo: o/` We all live in a yellow submarine, yellow submarine, yellow submarine!! o/`

Author: Yes…

Milliardo: Save me…

Paul: Makes plenty of sense to me…

The Beatles: **Sigh**

Wufei: Can we get on with it?!

Heero: YES, PLEASE!!

Duo: o/` Lady Madonna, children at your feet, I wonder how you manage to make ends meat…o/`

Quatre takes off Duo's headphones.

Duo: HEY!

Quatre: We need to get back to the story…

Duo: WHAA! I WANNA LISTEN TO THE BEATLES!!

Paul: This guy has lost it…

John nods in agreement.

Duo: I herd that!

John: oi…

Duo: can I listen to the CD in the sub?

All: YES! JUST GET ON WITH IT!!

Duo: Sheesh! **Gets in the sub again** I'm still the captain!

Heero: -_-`` **Follows Duo**

Quatre: Get in everyone, time to start shooting again!

Paul: Hey wasn't there 6 of you?

Wufei: Yeah…

Ringo: Where's the 6th one?

Quatre: Huh?

Wufei: Who's missing?

Heero: **Pokes head out of the sub** I dunno…

Milliardo: Trowa…

All: OH!

Duo: **Gets out of the sub** I guess we never noticed `cuz he never talks…

John: We know how that is…**Looks at Gorge**

~Where Trowa is~

Trowa: **eating Duo's secret stash of donuts** Heh-heh…

Duo's voice from far away: HEY! My Donuts!

Trowa: Ah-oh…

Quatre's voice from far away: Trowa must have taken them!

Wufei's voice, who is closer: …I wouldn't be suprised…

Duo can be heard running toward the closet where Trowa is hiding.

Trowa: Oh, crap…

Duo: **opens door and sees Trowa eating donuts** TROWA!!

Trowa: Well, I…got hungry…

Quatre: **Out of breath** …this is getting people confused…

Wufei: huh?

Quatre: If the people reading this story are completely lost, say 'I'!

Everyone reading the story: I!

Quatre: I rest my case…

Duo: FINE!

~Back at the set~

Everyone is in the subs…

Duo: Trowa, I'm gonna make your life a living {Censored}…

Trowa: Heh-heh…

~Scene um…maybe 100? I lost count…as I stated earlier~

Duo: **Puts in the Beatles CD** YEAH!

Wufei: I hope those fish are gone…

Quatre: Fish? What fish?

(Wufei sees the 6 fish again outside the window of the sub.)

Wufei: Never mind…

Milliardo: The Beatles…why don't they go back to Britain or…or where ever they came from!!

Heero: I'm with ya…

Quatre: No respect…

Wufei: do you 3 like music at all?

Milliardo: Yeah…

Trowa: but uh… I'd rather not discuss it…

Duo: What? Do you listen to Rap or something?

Trowa: Well, I…

Quatre: YOU LISTEN TO RAP?!!!???@_@

Trowa: Well, I…

Wufei: That is…weird…

CD Player: o/` WE ALL LIVE IN A YELLOW SUBMARINE! o/`

~1 hour 27 minutes and 9 seconds later~

Ringo on the intercom: You still behind us?

Duo: YUP! Still here!

John: Well, there's America!

Heero: FINALLY!

Duo: **Pulls out 3 portable CD players, with headphones, and 3 of the Beatles 1 CD's** Here!

Heero: **Takes one** Ugg…why me…

Trowa: Maybe I can tap the earphones so they can tune into the radio instead…

Quatre: Oh, no…You're listening to it…

Milliardo, Trowa, and Heero: GGAAHHHHH!

TO BE CONTINUED…