Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Insecurities 1 ❯ Chapter 4 ( Chapter 4 )

A/n -Stray (who betas for me despite all the work)[Author ID1: at Thu Oct 4 20:52:00 2007 ] [Author ID1: at Thu Oct 4 20:53:00 2007 ]tells me I'm writing angst…so angest warning (slight)[Author ID1: at Thu Oct 4 20:52:00 2007 ]

Chapter 4

 

4.1: Division by three

 

When Heero first saw the girl sitting next to Wufei, he was sure it was some mistake in the seating order. Wufei did not sit in the middle row of a lecture theater[1], especially not a half empty lecture theater (Application of Quantum Mechanics in Nuclear Physics was not very popular subject) and he most certainly did not sit next to a female.

 

Heero had arrived early, having had a free hour before, to sit in his usual place. The lecture theaters were large, after all they were constructed with a large crowd in mind and there was always enough space for everybody (apart from during Cultural Studies of Pornography which was a very popular lecture). But Heero preferred to sit in the second row, the first row being too close to the projector, and Wufei always sat next to him in the left hand seat. That way Heero had a good view of the main entrance (a habit left over from the war) and his right hand was free for movement (though he did not bring a gun to the lecture with him).

 

That day Wufei arrived late, almost running, followed by a long haired female who was slightly familiar. She was obviously Chinese and was wearing a traditional Chinese tunic over a dark green denim. They both walked past Heero deep in conversation…

 

“…away from me,” Wufei was saying. “I am not going to do that. What do you think I am, you stupid woman?”

 

At least some things remained constant in the universe. .

 

But they had both walked up to the middle row, Wufei not even acknowledging Heero, and had sat down in two free seats, the female gesturing wildly as she spoke. Heero had been about to go up to Wufei to inquire about his change in seating when the lecturer walked in and he was forced to sit still.

 

The lecture was nicknamed Unclear Physics for a reason. To Heero, the man might as well have been teaching ancient Greek as he sat through the lecture, counting minutes for it to be over. He was starting to discover that he was extremely hurt that Wufei had chosen to sit next to a woman instead of him. It was not as if they had a prior agreement but they were lovers and for Wufei to go sit with someone else was almost as if he was making a statement -was Wufei cheating on him?. They had sat in the same order since they had begun taking the lecture together and the loss of Wufei left him with a feeling similar to the one he'd had felt the first time he'd left the house without his gun - well, almost.

 

Did that mean Wufei was going to be avoiding him from now on? What did that mean in light of their relationship? He kept on looking at Wufei wondering if there was going to be some indication as to what was going on but all he could see was his profile as the other boy continued to take down notes on some equation about the Schrödinger theorem.[2] In contrast, it was obvious the girl was not paying any attention to the lecture.

 

Heero was sure that he had not seen her before which meant she wasn't even a part of the school -or a new student. He still catalogued people he met in the hallway, a habit he did not even notice anymore. Someone that pure bred Chinese would have been hard to miss. She would scribble short notes which she would pass over to Wufei who would ignore them with an impassive face. However, Heero did not think Wufei was enjoying himself.

 

The girl would occasionally prod Wufei to get his attention, which did not amount to anything but Heero was getting annoyed by the sight of the girl elbowing Wufei. She should have at least waited until the lecture was over to get his attention….

 

“…Mr. Yuy.” Heero realized that the lecturer had been calling his name for sometime while he had been staring at Wufei. Even Wufei was staring at him.

 

“What?” he asked, cursing his lapse in concentration.

 

“Back with us are you?” the lecturer said mockingly. “Now can you please answer the question?”

 

“What question?” Heero blurted out. “Sir.”

 

“The one I asked you about the …oh…” the lecturer was starting to lose his temper and Heero was beginning to feel uncomfortable. He did not like it when he was the center of attention. The main intent of any public situation was to blend in and he could not have been any more conspicuous if he had showed up to the lecture naked. Everyone in the lecture hall seemed to be collectively holding their breath, probably feeling sorry for Heero but at the same time glad that they had been spared the questioning. He pointedly ignored Wufei who was trying to mouth the answer to him and chose to glare at the lecturer who looked like a boiled lobster. “Can you kindly tell me the theory behind particle acceleration for the creation of anti-matter?”

 

“No.” Heero did not bother trying to fabricate a half-assed answer like Duo would have done.

 

“Were you paying attention to the lecture?”

 

“No.”

 

“What *were* you paying attention to,” the lecturer asked in a strained voice.

 

“Them.” Heero pointed towards Wufei and the girl.

 

“Mr. Chang,” The lecturer sounded puzzled as he focused on the couple. Wufei was already famous among the lectures for being a model student - one who did not misbehave and handed over the assignments right on time. “Why would…” the lecturer paused, his eyes fixed on the girl who continued to whisper to Wufei despite the drama unfolding before her. “…who are you, young lady?”

 

“I'm Jasmine Yao,” the girl said clearly, tossing back her hair.

 

“I've never seen you at my lectures before.” The lecturer sounded puzzled.

 

“That's because I'm not a taking this course,” the girl …no…Jasmine answered. “I'm not even of this school.”

 

It was the straw that broke the camel's back. “That's it,” the lecturer bellowed. “Outsiders have no permission to sit in to the lecture.”

 

“Fine,” Jasmine said flippantly. She stood up and shrugged. “I'll leave.” The insolent manner she said it had a few tittering.

 

“Mr. Chang,” the lecturer said, fuming. “Kindly escort your girlfriend outside and stay out.”

 

“She's not my girl…” Wufei protested.

 

“I don't care if she's your second cousin from England.” The lecturer was clearly struggling not to say anything vulgar. “Just get out…both of you…no…Yuy, get out as well. All three of you can do whatever you want as long as you're not doing it during my lecture.”

 

Heero wordlessly picked up his books and walked out after a red-faced Wufei and a triumphant-looking Jasmine. He was aware of all the students there staring at the three of them and knew they had caused a spectacle but he was too riled up to be bothered.

 

“Forget it,” Wufei was saying. “You have caused enough trouble for me.”

 

“I will not leave until you agree to come with me,” she said in an imperious voice.

 

“Wu…'Fei?” Heero said stepping into the conversation. Two dark haired heads turned as one in his direction.

 

“Yes,” the girl said looking slightly puzzled.

 

“Heero,” Wufei said, sounding angry. “Did you have to point me out during the lecture?”

 

“I was just wondering why you decided to sit in a different place,” Heero said as an explanation. He knew Wufei was angry at him for the incident but Heero had thought Wufei would realize that his intention had not been to cause trouble.

 

“Because me, I've got some woman following me,” Wufei practically spat out. “She has decided that I should come meet her family since they are also from L5. Having a common point of origin does not automatically make me want to meet her relatives. ”

 

“I am not some woman,” the girl said. “My name in Yao Fei Yen. When you called Wufei by his shortened name, for a moment I thought you were calling me.” She turned to Wufei and said in a deprecating voice, “You are Wufei, you should not let outsiders deface your name. It was given to you with love and pride by your parents…”

 

“Shut it, woman,” Wufei said automatically. Heero waited for his boyfriend to say something about him not defacing Wufei's name but that sentence never came.

 

“I thought your name was Jasmine,” Heero said with a frown.

 

“I use it to blend in with others.” Her voice said others were commoners while she was royalty. “My name means a swallow bird,” the girl…Fei Yen said, looking pleased. “You must be Heero Yuy, Wufei's friend.” She held out her hand the way Europeans did.

 

Heero did not take the proffered hand and continued to scowl at the girl. “Why don't you leave Wufei alone,” he said firmly.

 

“It's for him to decide,” Fei Yen said smugly. “I just want him to come meet my family. They would be honored to meet the surviving son who would rule L5.”

 

“There is no L5,” Heero stated.

 

“But the spirit lives on.” The reply was almost cliché.

 

“I've done my share for the war,” Wufei said sounding tired. “I just want to be left in peace.”

 

“From what I hear you spent the war hiding,” Fei Yen said angrily. “You decided to show your face after the war was over, after everything was over. My grandparents and my parents lived through it. You owe it to your people to come and at least speak to them.”

 

“I refuse,” Wufei said straightening up. “I have work to do, not bother with nonsense like this. And what do you know about war?”

 

“Then I'll follow you,” the annoying girl said triumphantly. “Where ever you go, I'll be there. All your lectures, lunch, work. I'll follow. Even the little boys' room,” she added as an afterthought. “I've got three brothers so you haven't got anything I haven't seen before.”

 

In retaliation to the statement Wufei looked at the girl for a moment then dropped his back pack. Heero was startled to hear the books hit the ground since, usually, Wufei practically worshiped his books. With speed that astounded all of them Wufei moved - he picked up the girl, pinned her to the wall and punched her in the stomach. Heero knew his lover was holding back - Wufei was extremely strong and had he used his full strength, the girl would be dead. She wheezed, her mouth open in shock.

 

“Every time you bother me, I'll do this to you,” Wufei said slowly. “Don't mistake me for someone who doesn't hit women. I do not need weaklings like you bothering me, understood?”

 

Too winded to speak, the girl nodded as she was let go. She fell to the floor clutching her stomach and gasping. Her eyes were slightly fearful and her lower lip trembled.

 

“Yuy,” Wufei snapped. “Get her out of here. I don't want her blocking the pathway when Professor Wilder comes out. I have to apologise to him for what happened at the lecture and…”

 

Heero was slightly hurt that Wufei had called him `Yuy' as if they were strangers. However, he was glad the girl incident came to an end. He found the girl too intense; there was something troubling about the way she acted. Not even Relena's pursuing of him bordered on that sort of extremism.

 

“Just do it,” Wufei snapped. “I've had enough of people trying to treat me like some puppet at their beck and call.” The way he said it while looking at Heero implied Wufei included Heero in the statement. “I'm going to be late today, so don't expect me for dinner.”

 

It was clearly a dismissal and by then the girl had recovered enough to stagger to her feet. She stared at Wufei for a bit but she was obviously scared of him and did not linger. Instead, she limped out the side door, holding onto the wall for support, her eyes filled with unshed tears. Heero actually felt sorry for her - but had he known that in a few days time Wufei would be the one going to her, he would have happily killed her.

 

Heero walked out as well before the lecturer he had angered came out. Unlike Wufei, he did not consider Professors to be Gods. Angry at Wufei for dismissing him, Heero turned around and walked into the men's room. He did not need to use it but while lectures were going on, the toilets were empty and gave a semblance of privacy for him to think. He needed to try and figure out why he felt hurt at Wufei's curt dismissal. He washed his hands, then used the water on his palms to try and push back his hair. It had grown longer and he would need to cut it. Maybe he should cut it really short like they did in the Armed Forces…

 

Heero was absentmindedly looking at himself in the mirror he noticed the main door open, then shut hastily without the person entering the toilet. He froze, looking at it in disbelief. Heero had been trained to capture details of an image presented to him for two seconds. And he knew he was not mistaken. The person who had been about to enter the room had been wearing a black t-shirt, blue jeans, sneakers and a long chestnut braid.

 

It had been Duo and Duo had avoided him. Heero was stunned by the action. For one, he knew Duo did not have lectures until three o'clock and that was another two hours away. Duo never came in early if he could help it. And why had he not spoken to Heero - did that mean Duo had come to see Wufei, only?

 

4.2: Division by two

 

“No,” Quatre said firmly as he stood in the doorway. Trowa thought that the blond was overreacting but he could think of no way to tell him that without sounding rude.

 

“At least let me come in,” he said instead.

 

“Not today, Trowa,” Quatre said with a shake of his head. “You know I'll cave in if I let you talk me into it. So, no... Tell Cathy I am busy…make some excuse. I'm not going to pretend to be your boyfriend for the sake of your sister anymore.”

 

Trowa almost turned around and walked away just then. What did Quatre mean by pretending to be his boyfriend; as far as he was concerned they were together. He'd considered Quatre's reluctance to give a clear word a sort of game. The smaller pilot had told Duo he was going to make Trowa pay for sleeping with Heero when he knew Quatre liked him. It had been a defensive move - Trowa had been sure Quatre would not be able to match the darkness within him.

 

Then Quatre had surprised them all and Trowa had come to realize that perhaps the Quatre he had fallen for was not a real person. The real 04 pilot was a tough solider who could kill but also a sensitive person who could live with it and not turn into a monster. The real Quatre was stronger, more compassionate and more composed - he knew what he wanted.

 

It made Trowa fall for him again and he could truly say that Quatre was the only person for whom he'd ever felt that way.

 

And he had thought the feelings were mutual.

 

“I can't lie to Cathy,” Trowa said, leaning against the doorframe and crossing a leg casually. “She said she'd cook, so please, it's just dinner.”

 

“You don't have to lie,” Quatre said with a grimace. “I'll take night shift today - I have to sort out a few papers.”

 

“Are you angry with me because I slept with Heero?” Trowa asked, floundering. “It's not as if I'm still doing that.”

 

Quatre made to slam the door but Trowa did not move and the door stayed open. “Trowa,” Quatre said in frustration. “Sex isn't the issue here.”

 

“All right,” Trowa said cautiously. He tried to school his expression to one of puzzlement but he wondered just how successful it was. Cathy always complained he'd be good at poker. He could pretend to be different people and mimic their expressions but stripped of his cover, he felt bland - expressionless.

 

“It's that I want more.” The expression on Quatre's face said he was trying hard to explain. “Maybe it is Heero,” he admitted at last. “When I first found out, I was so jealous. There I was, in …I liked you quite a bit and there you were screwing Heero in your Gundam. Damnit, Trowa sometimes I could feel you, you know. In my head, I could feel you as you…” He blushed adorably but now Trowa did not know what to say.

 

“I'm sorry,” Trowa said at last.

 

“Then you broke up with him and I sat in the garden under your feet while Heero wanted to know what he did wrong,” Quatre continued. “He was so hurt and you didn't care at all. Trowa how can you sleep with someone for so long and not develop any feelings for the person? How can you be so cold?”

 

“I care about Heero,” Trowa protested. “He means a lot to me.”

 

“Bu..t what …you and him,” Quatre said in a small voice.

 

“He needed the physical contact,” Trowa explained. “When he gets stressed he needs to feel someone else.”

 

“A hug couldn't do,” Quatre said a little bitterly.

 

“For Heero, the only physical contact that means anything is sex,” Trowa said with conviction. “Sometimes I wonder who did that to him. You think Duo has problems, uh? Heero has containers full of them. You think I didn't care for him…maybe not enough to sort him out but I did help him.”

 

Quatre wordlessly looked away.

 

“Give me a chance,” Trowa said softly, making one last attempt. “Quatre, I don't know how you want me to act.” Perhaps he should not presume sex was a part of it. Maybe, he should pretend he didn't want that sort of thing. But he really didn't feel brotherly towards Quatre- it was ironic that he felt more brotherly towards Heero even after having had sex with him for months than Quatre - the guy he'd only kissed once rather briefly.

 

“I can't forgive you that easily,” Quatre said softly. “Can you give a commitment, Trowa? I don't want a one night stand, I don't want something like what you had with Heero - I want something from you that you can't give. I'm angry with you, still and scared to give you a commitment.”

 

“I can try,” Trowa offered. It was the best he could do.

 

“Maybe,” Quatre said, his eyes downcast. “I don't want to get hurt by you. I was hurt once and you don't even know how much. How would you like it if I started going out with someone else?”

 

“Will you?” Trowa felt cold sweat break out all over. “I like you a lot.” He added, in case that wasn't clear.

 

“You think I'm easy?” Quatre said, looking up. His cheeks were blazing with anger and Trowa thought it made him look cute. But he wisely refrained from mentioning that. “I think you owe me a lot more after the hell you've put me through. If you think I'm going to jump into bed with you just because you like me and you feed me along with your sister, then you are mistaken. You'd better start shaping up.”

 

Trowa nodded, stepping back this time when the door closed in his face. He stared at it for a while then sighed. He had no idea what to say or do. Things were rapidly spiraling out of control and everything he said seemed to sound wrong. His hands stuck in his pockets, Trowa strolled back to his apartment, climbed up the stairs two at a time and walked into his room.

 

And stopped. Standing by the window, looking down at the road below was a familiar figure. Trowa closed the door behind him and the person turned around unhurriedly, his face blank. Cursing Wufei, Duo and everyone around, Trowa was walking forward, his hands outstretched. `A hug will have to do,' he thought.

 

“Heero,” he said. “What's wrong?” He knew this expression so well. The expression of someone lost, who didn't know how to admit he was lost.

 

“You need a bigger room,” Heero said dispassionately.

 

4.3: Field Assignment

 

The garden of the Headquarters was a marvel of horticultural landscaping, designed by the same gardener who had designed the Sanq Castle. It was maze made up of bioengineered hedges fast growing on imported soil, eight feet tall and a greenish blue color. Each turn of the maze took to a small niche where something special awaited the one who walked by. The first turn was a small fish pond, about ten inches deep and full of small brightly colored fish, the second turn a small bench where two people could sit comfortably. There were about fifteen small secrets, each one different from the other, each a special enclosed space. It was amazing just how much could be fitted into a small enclosure with the correct planning.

 

Looking down from the floor below, the Floating garden (aptly named since it was on the balcony of the 27th floor) Shaun had a good look at it from the upper floor window. The maze was a complex geometrical structure with an open top. From above, he could see the only two people using it and scowled. Zechs was walking calmly through it, side by side with Princess Relena.

 

He turned back and walked to the office and picked up the stack of papers next to him. “Where does this go?” he asked Sally.

 

“That's for Quatre to sort,” she said, looking frustrated. Since Lady Une was away, the whole administrative burden seemed to have fallen on Sally's shoulders; the only sensible person in the entire office. “He asked for night shift all of a sudden - I don't know why but I'm grateful.” She added.

 

Shaun personally thought it was because Winner wanted to suck up to everybody but didn't say so. The last time he'd said something like that about a Gundam pilot, Sally had snapped at him, telling him he was mistaken. But Shaun couldn't stand those guys - those show offs who were so stuck up they never even smiled at him when they passed him on the corridor. And that Chang guy whom Sally seemed to hold in high regard, though the guy did not seem to return the sentiment.

 

Zechs in contrast had been very nice to him. The guy had listened to what Shaun had said, even down to his fashion advice. Really, red and black did not suit someone with such pale skin; it made him look like a vampire[3]. When he had said it, Zechs had laughed and clapped him on the shoulder and said he was so used to dressing in red he sometimes forgot there was any other color.

 

They had walked the corridors of the headquarters with Shaun telling him everything. And Zechs had listened and asked him questions and Shaun had been aware of all the heads turning towards them. Zechs was a striking figure - Shaun had seen vid-shots of the guy during the war and he was more impressive in person. He had a charming smile, almost hunting and the way he moved…

 

With sigh, Shuan picked up the first letter on the stack and looked at it. He was not supposed to read official office documents but Sally never commented on it and he knew the paper work was just for backup and should he damage it, there would be no dire consequences There were two copies of each and every transaction in the form of two super computers at two different locations, one in Lady Une's office, the other in the basement of the building.

 

To him, it seemed all too complicated and excessive. Lady Une had assigned the paper work and it was being processed, double checked for errors. The paper he was holding was a field assignment for two Gundam pilots. Half curious Shaun looked up at the top of the paper.

 

Ah, a simple field assignment for Trowa Barton to see if he was fit for active duty. Shaun recalled that the guy had stopped a bullet meant for Princess Relena with his chest. Stupid guy, should have let the chick die as far as Shaun was concerned. He looked at the assignment details.

 

“A flower festival!” he exclaimed aloud.

 

“What,” said Sally looking up from her screen. “Ah, yes…that assignment for Trowa. Une said she was going to arrange it before she left.”

 

“But what's there to investigate on a flower festival in L4?” Shaun complained. To him, it looked like a free ticket to outer-space and a waste of money.

 

“We are trying to track people who are shipping endangered plants off Earth,” Sally explained patiently. “It's illegal to send rare plants to outer-space and we believe that there might be a deal going on in the back ground, using the festival as a cover. There'll be thousands of plant dealers so it will be an ideal opportunity to see if our hunch is correct.”

 

Shaun wouldn't have cared if people were shipping banana plants to L2 so that they could use the leaves as umbrellas.[4] He shrugged and looked at the report again. It was better than watching Zechs and Relena from the window.

 

The assignment was all code to him - the Barton guy was the tall one with the sister. Ah, he was partnered with Heero Yuy, the guy everyone said was Japanese even though he had blue eyes and looked nowhere near oriental. The mission was for two days -usual communication protocol and their contact in the inside was a flower trader who dealt in Asian roses.

 

Shaun yawned, got up and looked out at the balcony below. Zechs was arguing forcefully with Relena, both of them talking animatedly. Relena was using her power posturing, her back straight, her chin trust up front but Zechs was not budging either. Shaun licked his lips and looked away. Among everyone in the HQ, Zechs was by far the nicest. He had not been there for long but already Shaun liked him - a lot. He knew the man was complex, probably evil and also a little unstable- but he really didn't care. He had been treated with contempt by everyone but Zechs treated him like an equal.

 

“So,” he said, turning around and leaning against the glass. “This flower thingy…will there be fire fights and stuff.”

 

“I doubt it,” Sally said dryly. “The war is over now and no one's going to thank us if we send kids into danger. Anyway, it's a simple mission, not something life-threatening. All we need is visual confirmation…”

 

He sighed and looked out again. Relena was holding on to Zechs' upper arm and even from the distance, tears were obvious. The bloody female was a menace. She had Heero Yuy so she should stick to him. Shaun could see the attraction in Heero; he was gorgeous, with those blue eyes and hair that screamed to be touched - but so cold. His eyes were so expressionless, almost the same as the Barton guy, who though good looking, actually covered half his face with his hair.

 

Shaun shrugged; he knew that Dorothy liked the blond guy who looked harmless but was as disturbing as the rest. The long-haired pilot- Duo, had to be gay. As far as Shaun was concerned anyone who had long hair like that was a walking advertisement for gayness. Maybe he should spread the word around the office that the braid wasn't the only thing that swung both[that'd mean he is bi] ways for that guy …and to think they said his hair had been longer. He had read somewhere that one in five males was statistically gay so of those five, maybe, the Maxwell guy was the one. There was the Chinese guy -Shaun scowled at the memory of Wufei bearing down at him with his sword. It had been scary -and as much as he would have loved to see that face turn red after accusing Wufei of being gay, Shaun did not feel brave enough to face his wrath.

 

It was all right to feel a little self pity now and then. He was a cast out, taken in the same way people take in strays they feel sorry for. It did not make him feel welcome. It made him an outsider in an organization already full of social rejects. When Zechs had walked in, no one had welcomed him with open arms - apart from Noin -- and Shaun was sure that package included open legs as well.

 

But from the way Zechs treated Noin, he seemed to feel nothing towards her apart from sisterly affection. There were no rumors that they had been lovers before the war so he couldn't see how they were going to be lovers all of a sudden. Unless the guy had had a sudden shift of heart and had switched to …Relena!

 

They were hugging.

 

Below, in the secluded garden Zechs and Relena were hugging. Shaun practically broke his nose, jumping forward for a better look. He almost jumped when a hand fell on his shoulder. He spun around with his heart in him mouth to find Sally standing next to him. He cursed the woman as he remembered that though she worked as a doctor, she was also a solider and could walk silently when needed.

 

“It's nice to see they've made up,” she said with a faint smile.

 

“Made up,” Shaun said weakly. Those two were together!

 

“Hmm,” Sally said thoughtfully. “They've been separated for so long; it's good to see some families can be mended.”

 

“Families.” They were married!

 

“Oh, I forgot,” Sally said, clearly enjoying herself. “You don't know. Zechs is Relena's brother.”

 

“Brother,” Shaun parroted weakly.

 

“His real name is Miliardo Peacecraft,” Sally said casually. “It's ironic that…”

 

“He's a prince,” Shaun said at last.

 

“You could say that,” Sally said after a bit of consideration. “It's not as though he's going to take up his title… or…”

 

Shaun spun away from the window, feeling sick. He was starting to wish Zechs was actually married to Relena or something like that. Hell, it wouldn't be as bad if Zechs was married to the Chang guy and that was the worst he could think of. No, the worst is: being married to Wufei and being female. But for him to be a prince…was unthinkable. It was like betrayal. Shaun could not understand why he felt so hurt - it wasn't as if he liked the tall blond [really? it sounds as though he has a major crush on him]- but as he pushed Sally away and ran out the room, he could feel a lump in his throat, which was threatening to turn into tears

 

 

4. 4: More Division

 

“Let's go through this again one more time, slowly,” said Duo, gritting his teeth. “What did you do?”

 

“Maybe it's you who did something,” Wufei said, sitting straight, looking at the wall over Duo's shoulder. “We both know Heero has a weak spot for you.”

 

“That's rich coming from you,” Duo snapped. “I haven't seen him the entire day -well once briefly but that's it. So it must have been you.”

 

Wufei remained silent since he was starting to become aware that maybe the fault was his. Had he done something stupid, anything which would hurt Heero? Far from being the unfeeling bastard, Heero did have feelings -which did not mean he was a big cuddly bear waiting for his hug- but Heero did have a sensitive side. He had not meant to hit the girl -it was weighing on his mind a lot. While Duo was accusing him of hurting Heero's feelings he was wondering if he had been too rough on the girl. But she had been so annoying and manipulating ….and he hated being manipulated.

 

He wanted to run his life his own way, not by some stupid girl.

 

“I haven't seen him since the Physics lecture,” Wufei said evasively.

 

“I thought the two of you usually have a free hour afterwards which you use to study in the library together,” Duo grumbled.

 

“We did invite you,” Wufei said skirting the issue.

 

“But did you do it today?” Duo sounded dangerous.

 

“Um,” Wufei looked down at his feet. “There was this stupid woman and Heero got us kicked out of the hall and…”

 

“Rewind,” Duo said sounding dangerous. “Let's start with the woman shall we?”

 

“There's nothing to say,” Wufei said, feeling irritated. “Why don't you just give it a rest?”

 

“Shall I tell you why,” Duo asked in a falsely pleasant voice. “Ready…” He reached forward and before Wufei could stop him, hit the replay button in their vid-comm unit. He mentally cringed as the mechanical voice of the recording played, “you have *one* message. No visual unit connected. Playing sound now.”

 

He braced himself for the same cold tone as Trowa spoke. The voice managed to covey a feeling of displeasure no expression could.

 

“Wufei, Duo,” There was pause. “Where are you two?” The tone was almost derisive. “Whatever your problems are I want you to deal with it. I'm taking Heero out to dinner with Cathy and me. When we get back, I expect the three of you to talk it out with Heero. I don't expect to see him hurting afterwards because if he still does, the two of you don't deserve him. Barton, out.”

 

“End of recording.”

 

“Let's go back to this girl shall we?” Duo said dangerously. “What girl?”

 

“Someone from L5,” Wufei said reluctantly. “I don't think she's important and…” He looked at the time of the recording and frowned. “That's close to mid day…I know you don't have work or any lectures at that time. So why weren't you here you when the call came.”

 

Duo looked away looking slightly uncomfortable. “I was busy,” he said.

 

“Don't lie.”

 

“I'm not,” Duo said looking up sharply. “I don't lie.”

 

“But you didn't answer the question either,” Wufei pointed out. “Where were you?”

 

“Not here,” Duo tired.

 

“Not good enough,” Wufei snapped, standing up.

 

“I went to school, ok,” Duo said looking frustrated.

 

“Why?” Wufei asked, not liking the sound of it. They could barely get Duo to school when he had lectures so for him to go there during his free time was as rare as rain on the moon. “And if you were there, why didn't you come and speak to either me or Heero?” He stopped, remembering something.

 

“I saw him- ok,” Duo groused. “But he didn't see me…”

 

“How can you see him and him not see you?” Wufei pointed out. “This is Heero we're talking about not Relena. Maybe he thought you were avoiding him…”

 

“Maybe he thought you were traipsing around with some girl,” Duo snapped back.

 

“Maxwell, why were you in school in your off time?”

 

“Maybe I wanted to catch up with a little studying,” Duo said, crossing his arms defensively.

 

“Maybe I was born yesterday,” Wufei snapped.

 

“Fine,” Duo said, throwing up his hands, giving in. “I was hoping you wouldn't find out. I was avoiding you, all right?”

 

“What's going on?” Wufei asked with a sinking feeling.

 

“I…got a call from a student councilor,” Duo admitted finally. “Apparently, I've been cutting far too many classes and unless I do something about it, they are going to call social services.”

 

“Duo,” Wufei felt stricken but the word came out harsh.

 

“I know,” Duo snapped. “I was sort of going to keep it under wraps until I get it sorted out. No big deal…I met Mrs. Singh--- and she and--- I talked and---I've got her eating out my hand.“

 

Mrs. Singh was a small Irish woman married to an Indian Professor and she was about as docile as a rabid fox. She was sly and she always caught her student. And when she set her conditions you either met them or packed your bags and left for the Moon colony.

 

“What did I tell you about skipping classes?” Wufei said wearily as he walked towards Duo. “If you mess up…”

 

“They might split us up,” Duo finished. It had been one of Lady Une's demands. They had to prove they were not just machines but people with intelligence. “I know, I know…but sometimes I wonder if it's for the best.”

 

“What do you mean?” Wufei asked, feeling doubtful. The way Duo had spoken with an almost defeatist attitude…as if he had given up.

 

“I know you think you'll be better off without me,” Duo said, looking at his feet.

 

“What sort of half-assed thing is that?” Wufei bellowed as he walked up to Duo who was slumped on the sofa. He stood over Duo for a moment but the long-haired boy refused to look up. Feeling angry, Wufei grabbed Duo by the upper arms and hauled him up, intending to shake some sense into him. Duo cringed, and for a moment Wufei saw flash of fear in those purple eyes - like the time he'd tried to have sex with Duo and then he was shrugged off and Duo was at the other end of the room, panting.

 

“I'm sorry…,” he said then stopped. It was something he was familiar with when dealing with his long-haired lover. Duo did not mention that he had been scared and Wufei knew he was not going to admit that Wufei's sudden move had intimidated him. It was not something Duo talked about at all. But Wufei had to try. “You know I didn't mean to …” hurt you -- wrong thing to say “…er…” rape you ha ha nice choice of words “…intimida…”

 

“Forget it,” Duo snapped. “It's not exactly news that I'm a basket case. Why don't you just stop trying to manhandle me?”

 

“Manhandle you,” Wufei said indignantly. “I was just about to shake some sense into you.” But did that mean he was physically violent? Damn, he should not have hit that girl. He had killed people, blown up buildings and almost killed Noin. Why did he have to feel bad about this? Because Fei Yen wasn't evil …she didn't seem evil. She had the same brashness Duo had …only more …he was ignoring Duo who was now on the brink of losing his temper.

 

“Well, no need to worry. It's not like I'm about to shake up the nice little domestic scene between you and Heero,” Duo spat.

 

“Me and Heero,” Wufei repeated stupidly and un-grammatically. “Says the guy who was snuggling up to Heero because he broke a nail.” Which was basically unfair since Duo had lost half his hair but the Chinese pilot was angry at the accusation that he was keeping Heero for himself.

 

“Says the guy who was dropping his pants for Heero before I was out the door,” Duo shouted.

 

“I least I was willing to do it for both of you,” Wufei said before he could stop himself saying it. He knew Duo couldn't help it, but that day, when Heero had orchestrated the entire three-way sex thing, Duo had submitted willingly. But the first time Wufei had initiated sex (well, technically it had been Duo and they had been together only a brief while) Duo had behaved as if he was being led to slaughter.

“So, what it comes back to is that,” Duo said bitterly. “I know what I can't do it. You think I'm ignorant of my problem?”

 

“Hardly the thing I was accusing you of,” Wufei snapped. “But…”

 

“Are you two bitch-slapping each other over Heero?” a tentative voice said, making them all turn around.

 

“Quatre!” Duo exclaimed.

 

“Winner,” Wufei said in a slightly embarrassed voice.

 

“Domestic disputes are not my thing but I thought I'd drop in for a bit,” Quatre said as he dropped into a chair heavily. “If you two can control yourself for a little while, we have a bit of a problem.”

 

“Does it have anything to do with Trowa and Heero?” Wufei asked, sitting on a straight backed chaired carefully.

 

“I know he's taking out Heero to dinner but I was hoping it was because Cathy wanted to meet the guy whom she nursed for a month and not because you three had a falling out,” Quatre said hopefully.

 

“You keep your man to yourself and we'll keep ours,” Wufei said abruptly.

 

“Well,” Quatre said a little hesitantly. “You see there is a slight problem there …I think I told Trowa it was basically over between us before it began.”

 

“That's nice,” Duo said harshly. “So now Trowa decides to bounce back to Heero.”

 

“Maybe it was the other way around,” Quatre said quickly. “From what I know, it was Heero who went to Trowa, not the other way around.”

 

“Heero will not do that the moment he thinks he's alone,” Duo said hotly.

 

“He already did,” Wufei said dully. He remembered Heero coming to his room after Trowa had broken up with the Japanese pilot, lube in hand. From the look in Duo's face, it was obvious he was thinking the same thing.

 

There was a stunned silence followed by a slightly embarrassed cough from Quatre. “I suppose then that this is not a good time to tell you that they have a mission together on L4.” He held out a small palm top for the other two to see.

 

“Hey,” said Duo, grabbing it before Wufei could. “When do we get field missions?”

 

“Why do they get field missions together?” Wufei wondered aloud. “So…in the current situation, this is bad.”

 

“Very bad,” Duo said.

 

“Well, it could be nothing,” Quatre said softly. “They just went for dinner, not eloped.”

 

“Didn't Trowa take you for dinner with Cathy last time?” Duo said with a scowl. “And tried to screw you afterwards. It means a lot to him to take some to meet his sister.”

 

“You mean like his next lover,” Wufei said dryly. He prudently kept himself from pointing out that Trowa probably did not consider dinner with his sister a precursor for sex. “Why don't we just accuse those two of sleeping with each other again and leave it at that?”

 

“I hope that was joke,” Duo said angrily. “We are not giving up that easily.”

 

“Who said anything about giving up,” Wufei said. “It's just that there's got to be a way of not blowing this out of proportion.”

 

“Because you are so secure with Heero,” Duo sneered. “Come on, `Fei, admit it. He'd never leave you. Maybe you could start a threesome with him and Trowa.”

 

“Duo,” Quatre said shocked. “What's wrong with you?”

 

“Nothing,” Duo said. “I'm merely stating the facts.”

 

“No,” said Quatre reasonably. “You are exaggerating. This is what you'll do. You talk it out with Heero, give him some time and see if he and Trowa are …”

 

“Oh, no,” Duo said quickly. “You didn't come here so you could offer us sympathy…you came to see us so we can reassure you that Trowa was safe from Heero. You want Trowa for yourself don't you…”

 

“I don't know,” Quatre said softly.

 

“Make up your mind, Winner,” Wufei snapped. “If you saw him walking hand in hand with someone else on the road, for example Heero…” though how that would transpire was a mystery since neither Heero nor Trowa was the hand-holding type... “…would you go over and wish them luck?”

 

“Since it's Heero and Trowa, when you come across them having sex on the office table, will you wish them luck?” Duo supplied.

 

“Duo,” Wufei said wearily. Duo's description was more apt but he did not want to bring that up. “You are not helping."

 

“Well, at least if we shower him with affection, he'll stay around for a while,” Duo pointed out.

 

“That'll have to be after he comes back from the mission,” Quatre said, looking at his palm top. “He's leaving tomorrow mid-day.”

 

“We could ask him not to go,” Wufei said.

 

“We could also ask him how sex with Trowa is like,” Duo said.

 

“We could ask Sally to change the assignment so it's someone else paired with Trowa,” Quatre said practically. “I don't think she has even seen this. This came directly from Lady Une's office.”

 

“And tell them why we want a change in assignment?” Duo snarled. “Hell no. This is our problem so we solve it ourselves. We'll change that assignment.”

 

[1] Well, we call it that here at my uni

 

[2] My last Nuclear physics lecture was four and a half years ago, so don't shoot me for the mistakes. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schrödinger_method

 

[3] I realized by dressing Zechs in red and black, I was following Spike's color scheme. [really? I thought he is so old, he only comes in black-and-white] -the comment from Stray I leave as it is

 

[4] We do that here in my country