Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ RNDM True Stories ❯ All The RNDM That's Fit To Print ( Chapter 24 )

Tori: Wow… looking back at old posts… They really suck.

Kegawa: Um, news… It's not just the old ones.

Tori: There's something I wanna say that I'll do, but if I say it I won't do it.

Kegawa: And why is that exactly?

Tori: Because I have a deeply-ingrained fear of being predictable. When you're predictable, it means you've fallen into a pattern and then all you can do is tell the same story again and again and then people stop listening. o__o

Kegawa: Your mother didn't hug you enough, did she?

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Duet: Hey, we named the black mage in Final Fantasy IX Quatre…and now the dude in the armor keeps calling him 'Master Quatre'… *giggles*

Wu Fei: Steiner? What'd you rename him?

Duet: RASHID! *covers mouth and laughs*

Wu Fei: O__o… I can't believe you corrupted Final Fantasy…

Duet: Hehehe… you never saw me play Final Fantasy VII, did you?

~*~*~*~

Tori: *on the phone with Rei* …why don't you just make new inserts?

Rei: Because we don't have time. I need you to write a script for a five to seven page mini-comic. Site polls and Saori want Duo and his ward to hook up. That or Heero and his ward. Best stick to the first one though since Tobias is alive. Besides, Saori's drawing it and she's got it mapped out and some sex scenes done already minus backgrounds. Just give us a prelude and a cool conclusion. We need it by the 25th.

Tori: …'kay. *hangs up* Duo, Rei wants you and Rachel to hook up.

Duo: *sigh* You're gonna make me drive all that way just because Rei-

Tori: NO! O__O DOUJINSHI!

Duo: Oh, good... I didn't think that was legal anyway.

~*~*~*~

Heero & Duo: *answer the door and see a UPS guy get back in his truck and two big cardboard boxes on the front porch with 'Bandai' written on them*

Duo: Oh, this'll be good…

Both: *open the boxes and find two big chairs shaped like Gundam hands* …? *stand there, staring at them*

Heero: So… … …when do you think the rest of it'll arrive?

~*~*~*~

Tori: Did you post-

Duo: *holds up hand* Can't talk. Playing lemonade stand.

*five minutes later*

Duo: Whaddya mean $.20 is "too pricey" ya fuckin' mullet man-baboon-woman!? You don't even deserve lemonade! Go die!

((A/N: www.lemonadegame.com …I don't even ask anymore. -___-*))

~*~*~*~

Evan: Who are the little people in the basement playing Nintendo with Duo?

Quatre: Mm? Just the neighbor's grandkids. They hang out here all the time in the summer.

Duo: *runs up the basement steps and hides behind Quatre* Shit, dude, hide me!

Three little kids: *runs up the steps after him and chase him out the front door with empty water guns*

Duo: AHH! YOU GOT ME! MEDIC! *falls down in the front lawn*

Quatre: -___- Be right back… I'm the doctor. ^__^

~*~*~*~

Quatre: *answers the front door*

Nonna: Hello, Quatre! I came by to collect the chickens…

Quatre: Oh! C'mon in! ^__^ Lemme just go get them.

Evan: *walks into the foyer* Um, hello.

Nonna: ^__^ Hello, dear…

Quatre: *steps around Evan, herding the kids up from the basement* Here they are! *walks to the front door to let Nonna out*

Nonna: *whispers* Who is that strapping boy, Quatre?

Quatre: ^__^* That's my boyfriend, Evan.

Nonna: Oh! *looks back at Evan, then winks at Quatre* Bye you two… *shuts the front door behind her*

Evan: What was that?

Quatre: Gramma Nonna… ^___^ She called you 'strapping'.

~*~*~*~

Wu Fei & Duet: *sitting in silence, drinking*

Duet: …wanna hear something sad?

Wu Fei: What?

Duet: Those kids beat me at Mortal Kombat every time…and I spent close to three years practicing hand-eye coordination.

Wu Fei: Wanna hear something sadder?

Duet: What?

Wu Fei: Little Emily beat me at pool and the pool cue is bigger than she is.

~*~*~*~

Trowa: *strumming guitar and singing* That fateful night…the car was stalled… upon the railroad tracks… I pulled you out and we were safe… but you went running back…

Tori: Oh, God…not this song. >__< It's depressing…

Trowa: What was it you were looking for that took your life that night…? They said they found my high school ring…clutched in your fingers tight…

Hilde: The stupid kid… Who the fuck dies for a high school ring? *munches apple*

Trowa & Tori: It's supposed to be romantic!

Tori: Woah, Trowa… we need some time apart.

Trowa: Yeah, we should break up.

~*~*~*~

Duo: *wakes up and looks down to discover he's wearing their Shuichi cosplay jacket (the raincoat thing) and a sticker that says "Hello, my name is: Shuichi"* GOD FUCKING DAMNIT!

Duet: Nnnn… *covers face with pillow*

Duo: I thought we were done with the Shuichi thing! Oh I swear, if I find out the ladies had anything to do with this…

Duet: …you'll what? Hunt them down? I'm sure Cat would love that…

Duo: So it WAS Cat!

Duet: Shut up and go back to sleep…

~*~*~*~

Trowa: *sitting in the Jeep, waiting for the gas pump to stop*

Duo: *in the passenger seat* Advance. Check back. Advance luuuunge, recover forward. Retreat, check forward. Luuuunge recover back. Double retreat. Luuuunge recover back.. Advance, appel, luuunge recover back. Double advance. Luuunge recover forward. *does the whole footwork sequence with little finger-person.

Trowa: ///_-* You are so weird.

Duo: You're just as weird as me.

Trowa: If I had your kind of free time, maybe I'd be as weird as you, but for that to happen, I'd need a lot of money.

Duo: No, when you have money, it's called 'eccentric'.

~*~*~*~

Tori's Mom: *on the phone* Did you find husband yet?

Tori: Um, no…O__o

Tori's Mom: *exasperated sigh* Shame on you. *hangs up*

Tori: …the fuck was that?

Duo: Tori, when we get to your house, can we please introduce Jess as your fiancée?

Tori: …I don't want to kill her.

~*~*~*~

Duo: *munch munch* These things are better than pocky!

Wu Fei: INFIDEL! *whap*

Duo: o__o Did I say pocky? I meant sex.

~*~*~*~

Duo: But I'm not kidding… Try one. *holds out box*

Wu Fei: *takes one* …they have koalas on them. *arches eyebrow*

Duo: …they're Koala Munchies.

Wu Fei: *eats one* Cool! What are they really called?

Duo: Er, Koala Munchies.

Wu Fei: Seriously?

Duo: *nod nod* Translated it myself. ^__^ *munch munch*

Wu Fei: *looks at Tori*

Tori: Yes, Wu Fei. It says Koala Munchies.

~*~*~*~

Duet: *at a party*

Random guy: So… You wanna gimme head? *grins*

Duet: Sorry, but you're too big a dick to swallow.

~*~*~*~

Quatre: *whacks elbow on desk* OW!

Duo: Bless you.

Both: *look at each other*

Quatre: *walks away*

Duo: *goes back to typing*

~*~*~*~

Wu fei: Why are we watching FUSE?

Duo: Tori told us to.

Both: *sit in silence content with that as a reason*

Shout Out: YOU SOLD MY CAT FOR BUBBLE WRAP!

Both: O__o *snerk* … *giggle fit*

~*~*~*~

Duet: *looks around bedroom* What color are our walls?

Duo: Animerica and Newtype. Go to sleep.

Duet: No, I'm serious. Did we paint them light blue or white?

Duo: Um… didn't we have wallpaper?

~*~*~*~

Duo: How the hell do you sleep through Heero's morning routine?

Tori: …Heero has a morning routine?

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Tori: *on the phone with her brother* …why did you call me?

Yoruyuki: Um… Mother told me to.

Tori: Well did she tell you to say anything?

Yoruyuki: *pauses* No. *hangs up*

Duo: Ah yes… I can see the family resemblance.

Tori: -___-* Why am I going back? …can't I just live here?

Duo: Good Lord, no.