Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ RNDM True Stories ❯ w00t! RNDM! l337! ( Chapter 38 )

Tori: *toasting* I hope you all had a great holiday season and a happy new year! Um… *looks at Trowa*

Trowa: *looks at Tori* … *offers her his glass of vodka pure*

Tori: *stares at it then shakes her head* How can you still be drinking?

Trowa: *replies in Russian*

Both: *stare blankly at each other*

Tori: Wrong language, dear.

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All: *dragging their luggage into Mrs. Ichimura's house*

Mrs. Ichimura: //Heero, come here for a minute.//

Heero: Ah fuck. *follows her into the living room*

Mrs. Ichimura: *takes his hands in hers* //I have dressed you, kissed your hurts, and watched you grow for sixteen years, Heero Yuy. You are as much my son as Yoruyuki and more so than Saigo. Please provide well for my only daughter. Kosei is smiling down on you two.//

Heero: //I understand completely. Thank you for your blessing.//

Both: *bow and bump heads*

Mrs. Ichimura: //Damn it! I was trying to be dramatic and maternal! Heero, you idiot! Get out of my house!//

Heero: o.o Gomen nasai…

~*~*~*~

Duet: *sitting in the aviary with Duo, drinking* Hey, Duo…

Duo: Yeah, babe?

Duet: Outside of this aviary tonight… would I still fly?

Duo: …*looks at Duet* I don't think you can fly to begin with.

Duet: Oh, I can.

~*~*~*~

Wu Fei: Man, this sucks… No Christmas video this year…

Trowa: Why not? We've got them and a camera.

Wu Fei: But they're married now… And we're not home; we're in Japan.

Heero: All that means is Duo has zero access to his damn paintball gun. *rubbing his shoulder, thinking of last year* Plus now we have 'Lena to help us conspire.

Quatre: Isn't there some sort of law against taping people engaged in lewd acts without their consent?

Heero: Quatre, this is Japan… There're no laws.

~*~*~*~

Duo: *wakes up on the morning of the 23rd* Is it Christmas!?

Heero: *arches an eyebrow* Not even close…

Duo: Damn time zones… throwing off my internal clock.

~*~*~*~

Heero: *laughing* //Saigo… guns don't kill people…Bullets going really fast kill people.//

~*~*~*~

Tori: //So…Saigo. How are things?//

Saigo: //Mom disowned me, my dog is dead, the girl I like is a whore who's sleeping with my friends, and I have a stupid name because mom's a hippie.//

Tori: //Oh. That has to suck. You should move away and start over.//

Saigo: //Can I come live with you, sis? I'll be good; I swear on my life.//

Tori: O.O //No. American is not ready for a yakuza.//

~*~*~*~

Saori: //Check it out, Tori! LSD helps us draw a llama times better!// *holds up crude drawing*

Tori: //Saori…// *shakes head* //One, drugs are bad. Two… a 'llama' is not a unit of measurement.//

~*~*~*~

Quatre: *singing and wailing on Trowa's electric guitar* A cow… a cow… two cows! Where's the third? No one knows!!! OI!

~*~*~*~

Heero: Tori… will you…

Tori: O.O

Heero: …get your fat head… off my stomach…?

Tori: T__T

~*~*~*~

Duet: Let's go to a Dessart concert!

Wu Fei: OH! Or let's just skip a step and go straight to the train station!

Heero: Forget that! Look! Cyanide!

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Tori: Ahhhh… Christmas… The celebration of the birth of the baby Jesus…

Trowa: Ahhhh… Chanukah… the celebration of…that time when we…kept the light on for a couple of days…

Duo: Ah, Kwanza…

Duet: *smacks Duo upside the head*