Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! ❯ Chapter 5

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Chapter 5: Women Aren't So Weak Wufei!

*warning* this story is definitely going to contain some mature themes, thus the rating. They are not so much about sex or anything...well, they are about the female sex...and some, uh, things we have to deal with *cough*time of the month*cough*, but it should be interesting, hopefully funny, eventually. It's my first fic, so be nice! Puh-leeeez!!

*disclaimer* I don't own any of the Gundam Wing characters or anything, got that?! I own nothing related to them! ...though I wish I did :(




After breakfast, the Gundam Gang had to face the problem of finding the boys-turned-girls some clothes that would actually fit them. They had plenty of outer clothes to choose from, ranging from Relena's wardrobe to what Quatre had of his sisters' clothing. However, outer clothing wasn't the problem. They couldn't seem to find lingerie the right size to comfortably fit the boys. They were proportioned larger than most of the girls. Relena and Hilde didn't even bother getting out their assortment of bras; they knew they would never fit into them.

"I can go back to my place and grab some of my clothes," suggested Sally, "and you guys can try on Dorothy and Midii's clothes. They might have something that will fit you." With that, Sally left to pick up her own clothes. The boys were not looking forward to the next part. They were actually going to have to try on bras! That was something they never thought they would have to do.

"I don't see why we have to wear these." Mumbled Wufei. "They're pointless. They show through your shirt and they look uncomfortable. What's the point of them anyway?" The girls just looked at each other and smiled. The boys could be so clueless at times.

"They're for support." Said Midii. "There are many different kinds and they each have their own purpose. Take a sports bra for example. Without them, you can't run easily, it actually hurts sometimes. If you never where a bra you'll start to sag when you get older.."

"Sag?" asked Quatre.

"Uh...never mind Quat, just don't worry about it."

"...Ok, if you say so." He still looked confused.

"Here," said Dorothy, throwing a collection of bras at the boys, "go try these on and tell us how they fit." Quatre picked up one of the bras and immediately started blushing, as did Heero, surprise surprise, as he could easily imagine Relena in something like that. He would never admit it though.

"Awwww, do we have to? I agree with Wu-man, can't we just go without them? Pleeeaaase?" pleaded Duo quite pathetically.

"NO." said Hilde shoving him into the bedroom. The boys weren't gone for more than two minutes before Duo poked his head out with a sheepish look on his face.

"Uh... Hilde babe, um... could you help me snap this thingy in the back, I can't get it all the way."

"Oh Duo." Hilde sighed. "Come here."

"Thanks babe!"

"No problem."

"Hey guys!" yelled Duo as he walked back into the room, "I figured out how to get it on right!" A chorus of "Duo!!," "Shhhh!!!!!!," and "Not so loud!" could be heard from inside the room. The girls laughed.


Finally, Duo, Quatre, and Heero stepped out of the room, claiming they were comfortable. However, Wufei and Trowa didn't come out.

"Are you guys ok in there?" asked Midii banging on the door. Wufei opened the door looking extremely embarrassed.

"Um...this doesn't really fit."

"Well, is it too small or too big?" asked Relena.

"Definitely too small. So is Barton's, but he's too embarrassed to come out and say anything."

"Shut up Wufei!" Trowa yelled from inside the room.

"Well," started Relena, "we'll just have to wait for Sally to get back. Maybe you'll fit into something of hers, at least until we get to the mall." Wufei paled at the idea of going to the mall, and then blushed at the idea of wearing something of Sally's.

"No need to wait for me, here I am." Said Sally. Luckily, what she had fit the boys well enough, and they were finally ready to go. Well, maybe not.

"Wait a minute!" shouted Hilde. "You all can't go to the mall looking like that! Let us do your hair! We can put it nice and pretty." She said with this gleam in her eye. Wufei backed away.

"I don't need my hair to look 'nice and pretty'." He practically growled.

"Oh come on. It's not that bad. Heero, I can do yours! I won't do anything bad to it!" said Relena.

"No way! You are not touching my hair." He said, backing away, but unfortunately he backed right into the arms of Dorothy and Hilde who dragged him over to a chair in front of the mirror.

"Don't worry, it's not that bad." Relena assured him. She picked up the brush and ran it through his hair, or at least she tried to. However, as tangled as his hair used to be as a guy, it was longer and about ten times worse as a girl.

"Ow ow ow!!! Relena your pulling my hair out!!" Screeched Heero.

"Oh your such a big baby. Big tough guy can't even brush his hair."

"Maybe his head is more sensitive as a girl." Suggested Duo, glad that he could still put his hair in a braid and not be bothered to do anything else with it. Finally, about thirty minutes later, the girls had managed to persuade the guys into letting them do their hair. Of course, the most they could get done with it was putting it into a half ponytail, but at least it was brushed. So around 11:00 a.m. the group pile into two cars and headed off to the mall.

When the group got to the mall, the first store they went to was a lingerie store. Nothing too fancy, and they got just enough stuff to last them the two weeks. Of course, the guys couldn't seem to understand that if they just tried on the clothes given to them without any arguments, they would have been out of the store pretty quickly. Wufei, however, did not want to try on anything. He was pretty unnerved and felt awkward walking around in a "weak woman's" store, so he put up a fight to just about anything given to him, therefore causing him to stay longer in the store than was necessary. We all know that afterwards, though, he blamed it on everybody else.

By the time everyone had the right lingerie, it was past lunch time, well, according to Duo anyway.

"Can we puh-lease go eat now?!"

"Duo, it's only 12:30, how can you possibly be that hungry?" Hilde asked. Duo wasn't paying attention.

"Oh! Look! There's the food court! Come on!" He ran off to the restaurants.

"Yech, fast food, just what we need." Sally dryly commented. The group found a table to put their stuff at, and was about to go stand in line somewhere when Duo had to speak up again.

"Wait! Um... I have to go to the bathroom."

"Then go, its right over there." Midii said.

"I don't think you understand. I need to use the restroom." The others just looked at him. "Well... isn't it like an unwritten law or something that girls have to go to the bathroom in groups of at least two?"

"No! Just because we always seem to go to the bathroom in groups doesn't mean you HAVE to." Retorted Hilde.

"Oh, well, it should be a law." Said Duo.

"Duo," started Dorothy, "I get the feeling you WANT someone to go with you to the bathroom." Hilde smacked her forehead.

"Duh, how could we be so stupid." The others looked at her. "Think about it guys. It's his first time going to a public bathroom by himself as a woman. I certainly wouldn't want to go into a men's bathroom by myself for the first time."

"Oh, do you want someone to go with you Duo?" asked Relena.

"Uh...hehe, that would be nice, yeah." He stammered. Trowa was surprisingly the first to volunteer.

"I'll go with you Duo."

"I actually have to use the restroom too." Said Relena. Hilde also said she would go. So the four walked off towards the bathrooms while the others ordered their food. Duo stopped at the door.

"After you." He said, referring to the real girls. They pushed through the door, and as soon as they entered, they were hit with a cloud of different smelling perfumes all mixed together. Duo and Trowa immediately started coughing. To make matters worse, there was-

"A line?! There's a line to use the bathroom in here? What's up with that?" Duo practically shouted.

"Quiet Duo! It's a Saturday, so the mall is crowded. Women don't go to the bathroom as fast as men do. Just wait a minute." Said Hilde. Duo contented himself with scrutinizing the interior of the bathroom. It was nothing like a Men's Room.

"Hey no fair, you guys have couches in here, and a lot more space. There are bigger mirrors too! Not that we really spend too much time in front of a mirror, but that's beside the point."

"You do Duo." Trowa stated. Duo glared at him.

"Duo, you really shouldn't speak so loud. People are going to think you've had a sex change or something." Relena whispered.

"Well, technically I have." Duo pointed out. Relena rolled her eyes. By the time they finally got around to using the bathroom, Hilde and Relena had to do a check up on their make-up. Suddenly a group of girls came barging in, all trying to comfort some girl who was crying hysterically.

"Honey look, it's ok. Jon was a bastard anyway. You'll get over him in no time and find someone else."

"I don't want someone else Courtney! I want Jon!"

"No you don't." some other girl spoke. "He wasn't loyal to you! You need someone better than that."

"Oh, and who are you to be talking about loyalty, Ms. 'you were out of town and I was just keeping your boyfriend company in HIS apartment'!"

"Oh Jess do we REALLY have to bring that up AGAIN?"

"Ha, some friend you are. I don't think you ever apologized!"

"I did, but you were to busy ranting and raving to ever listen to me!" Duo and Trowa stared wide-eyed at this, as suddenly an all out cat fight started. The girl who was crying finally yelled,

"Hellooooo! This is about ME! You are supposed to be comforting ME! I don't give a crap about Jess's boyfriend! You really shouldn't worry so much about that anyway, he was a terrible kisser."

"When did you ever kiss him?!"

"Uhhhh...um, anyway, you were right, I don't need Jon, he's a jack-ass." She said quickly.

"I thought you still liked him?" The girl named Courtney asked.

"Your right, I do!" and she started crying again. Another girl came running into the bathroom.

"Guys! It's ok. I talked to Jon because I was really pissed, and it turns out the girl he was with is his cousin! He was just holding her hand because she's blind or something." The others all stared at her, and Duo thought this was the perfect time to grab Hilde's sleeve and drag her out the door.

"Ok, that was scary." Duo said, still wide-eyed.

"..." Trowa nodded in silent agreement.

"That's not scary." Relena said. "That's normal. Happens all the time." The guys stared at her.

"She's right ya know." Hilde agreed. The four then went and bought some food before heading back to the table. When they got there, Duo started talking to the other guys.

"Hey guys, no matter what, no matter how bad you may have to go, do NOT go to the bathroom until we get home." Trowa nodded his head. The other three decided it would be better if they just didn't ask.

After lunch, the group started shopping again. They went into one store, and the girls started picking out outfits for the guys.

"oooooh, Wufei, this color would look good on you. Try this shirt on." Dorothy said as she handed him a shirt.

"Um...Dorothy," said Wufei as he held up the shirt she gave him, "It's only half a shirt." Dorothy looked at him oddly. "Well it is! Look, if I tried it on, my whole stomach would be showing."

"Wufei... it's supposed to be like that." Wufei blushed.

"...Oh." He went and tried it on without any argument. On the other side of the store, Trowa was having similar problems.

"I thought we were done trying on bras." He said as he looked at the shirt
Hilde had handed him.

"We are." Said Hilde. "That's not a bra Trowa, its a shirt." Trowa looked at her skeptically.

"Are you sure?"

"I'm positive. It shows your midriff, sort of like those things Catherine wears."

"Ohhhh, I see. And you want ME to try it on."

"Yep."

"Oh ok...no."

"What do ya mean 'no'?"

"I'm not wearing something like that! I'm really a guy, in case you've forgotten, and I'm not trying to get other GUYS to look at me."

"Awww, but I thought it would be cute on you 'cause you have curly hair and it brings out the color of your eyes, which, by the way, do not ALWAYS have to be covered by your hair." Hilde said as she pushed the curly hair over Trowa's eye behind his ear. "There, see? Now go try this on." Trowa had gotten confused somewhere along the line when Hilde suddenly started talking about his hair and how it brought out his eye color or something, and did as she said.

"Hey guys!" yelled Relena from the dressing rooms. "Come here, I wanna see what you think of this outfit."

"No Relena! Stop, I don't want them to see me in this!"

"Aw, why not? It looks good."

"Relena, we're supposed to be finding clothes for the guys, not for us." Said Sally as she and some of the others walked in to the dressing rooms.

"Oh, it's not me." She answered trying to pull someone out into the open.

"Ah, stop, stop, stop!" But it was too late. Relena yanked him out of the stall so that everyone could see his new ensemble.

"Hey, looking good!" Duo teased as he and the others watched Heero blush red from the attention before glaring at Duo. Heero stood there in tan Capri pants and a light pink spaghetti strapped T-shirt that clung to his, well, her curves. He also had a light pink bandana in his hair, and platform tennis shoes adorned his feet.

"Wow Heero. That outfit really looks nice on you." Said Sally.

"Yeah, if I were a guy again I might be tempted to ask you to dinner or something."

"Omae o korosu, Duo."

"Yeah sure, like that'll ever happen. Relena and I have both heard that threat more times than I can remember, and yet here we are." Teased Duo. Heero started clinching his fists, and was seriously wondering if he should carry out the threat, at least on Duo's part anyway.

After about two more hours of endless shopping, the group decided to get ice cream. The guys were all wearing some of their new outfits, though not the ones they would have preferred to wear, but the ones that the girls had claimed were "Mall Clothes." As they were walking, they passed a rather large group of guys hanging around the fountain. The girls continued walking, looking straight ahead, but Duo and the others couldn't help looking at them suspiciously.

"Uh oh," said Duo looking at one of the guys, "I know that look. I've seen it many a time. Speed up guys." However it was too late. The group hanging out started whistling and calling out to them. They also start following them. The girls tried to ignore them, but the boys had never come up against this before, so they were getting a little ticked. One guy came up and slung his arm around Quatre.

"Hey Blondie, what's your name?"

"None of your business." Answered Quatre tartly.

"That's fine. If you don't tell me yor name, then I won't tell you mine. However, for the time being, you can call me milk, 'cause I will do your body good." He said sliding his hand lower on Quatre's back.

"Oh please, is that the best you can come up with? That line is so old. I could do better than that!"

"Well then, why don't you come over to my place and I'll show you how original I can be." He said flicking his tongue at Quatre and pinching his rear. Quatre turned around and slapped him across the cheek, hard.

"Ow, bitch!" said the guy as he walked off holding his cheek.

"Ow, ok ow, I think that hurt me more than it hurt him." Said Quatre, holding his hand.

"Nice hit Quat. Bam, right in the kisser."

"Thank you Duo." Suddenly Wufei's eyes went wide and he "yiped."

"What was that Wu-man?" asked Duo. For the time being, Wufei ignored the fact that he had called him Wu-man, and answered.

"Someone just pinched me!"

"Slap him, like Quatre did."

"But I don't know who." He said, looking around. Just then one of the guys came up and put his arm around him like what had been done to Quatre. At this point, the girls up front were getting tired of this, and Relena turned around and walked up to man.

"Excuse me, but you mind leaving us alone!" she said as she lifted his arm off Wufei's shoulder.

"Oh, I'm sorry, were we bothering you?" the guy said sarcastically.

"Piss off!" Relena yelled.

"Aw, and if we don't, what're ya gonna do? Huh?" Relena looked briefly at someone behind him.

"Absolutely nothing." She said with a smirk. "However-"

"I will." Zechs finished. The guy turned around and looked up into the eyes of Zechs Marquise (spelling?) aka Milliardo Peacecraft.

"Oh, uh, we were, uh, we were just leaving! Uh yeah. C ya!." With that he and his group ran off.

"Hey Milliardo!" Relena said while hugging him. "Hi Noin!"

"Hey, are you all ok?" asked Noin.

"Yeah, we're fine thanks. What are you doing here?"

"Probably the same thing you are, shopping."

"Oh yeah, duh Relena. Sorry"

"What are you all doing here by yourselves?" asked Zechs in that big brotherly way.

"Oh well, uh, we figured with ten girls, we would be ok." Relena answered, suddenly remembering the boys were no longer boys. The guys also remembered, and desperately wanted to leave.

"Well who are your friends?" asked Noin.

"Oh how silly of me, you don't know them. They're friends from school." Relena answered, trying to stall. "Uh, girls, this is brother Milliardo Peacecraft, and his fiancé Lucretzia Noin. They just came back from Mars for their wedding. Milliardo, Noin, this is, um...well why don't you guys introduce yourselves."

"Oh, heh, thanks Relena, how kind of you." Said Duo dryly.

"Well, why don't we start with you." Noin suggested looking at Wufei.

'Oh great.' He thought, and said the first name that came to mind. "Sally." 'Shit' he though, 'bad name.'

"Oh, you're a Sally too?" asked Noin.

"Oh, uh no, I was just going to ask her something," Wufei answered, trying to stall. "My name is, um...Meiran! Yeah that's it." He mentally winced at his choice of name.

"I'm Iria," said Quatre.

"Mary," said Heero.

"Cathy," said Trowa.

"And, saving the best for last, I'm Helen," said Duo.

"You remind me of Duo," said Noin. "Especially with the braid and all."

"Oh, uh, hehe, um...who's Duo?"

"Oh, someone we know," answered Noin.

'That's all I am? Just someone they know? Wonderful,' thought Duo.

"Where are the boys anyway?" asked Zechs.

"They had an emergency mission," answered Sally quickly. "Nothing too important, but they will be gone for a while."

"I wasn't aware they had a mission," said Zechs. "Actually, other than Wufei, I didn't know they worked for Preventors."

"Yes well, Lady Une must not have told you. They work part time. Their mission wasn't anything major."

"So they'll be gone for our dinner then. That's too bad, now we have five extra places." The others winced mentally, they'd forgotten about the pre-wedding dinner.

"Hey! Why don't you bring your friends here! There's enough room for them!" Noin suggested.

"Um...Ok, we'll try to do that," said Dorothy.

"Alright, well, that's tomorrow night, so we'll see you then. Bye girls!" said Noin as she and Zechs walked off.

"Phew, that was close," said Midii.

"No joke. I was starting to sweat," Duo said.

"Well, we have everything we need. I guess we can go now," said Dorothy. Normally, the guys would be glad they were finally leaving, but they all had one thing on their minds' at that moment. Just how were they going to survive a whole evening with Zechs trying to act like girls, and not slipping up on their true identities?




Well, that's another chapter done. I hope you liked it. It was a lot longer than my others, but it came out a little later than expected. Sorry about that. :) I know that this is under humor, but really, towards the end some of it is serious stuff. A lot of girls have to put up with harassment from guys, and it isn't something we enjoy. I think by the time this is over, the G-Boys will have learned some important lessons, which is why I turned them ALL into girls. Thanks so much again for all the reviews!! I really appreciate them! Please keep reviewing!!!! Until next time, ja ne!

*~Maxine~*