InuYasha Fan Fiction / Fan Fiction / Crossover Fan Fiction ❯ Wolves in Designer Clothing ❯ Naraku Returns! ( Chapter 11 )

Disclaimer: Inuyashaand Dr. Whoare the property of the respective copyright holders, who aren't me.

Chapter 11: Naraku Returns!

by Raven Dhancer

Inuyasha sat, picking bits of clay and orange bits out of his clothes, usinf his claws like tweezers. Kagome saw him and hesitated, she wasn't in the catbird seat anymore and wondered how he would treat her.

She came over in the end any way as one of his claws snagged up on the open weave of his coat thinggie. She whipped out a ruby file she had lifted from a artificial stand somewhere.

"Give me that."

He tyried to ignore her. But he couldn't free his finger. She stank of other men. It was hawt.

"Give me your finger." She released him and his finger and settled down to filing the claw with her knees about her ears.

""Kagome," he mumbled. "'Gome, I'm sorry I hurt you and now you have become a breakfast pastry."

She paused in her filing, "I'm what?"

"A cheese Danish."

She gave him a LOOK and change for a twenty. "You mean a cheezy tart."

"Yeah he said moving easily over her.

"Oh well," she said, tossing the nail file aside, "those are the best sort."

ooooo000000ooooo

Kagome had left, saying she was going to re-rouge her cheeks. Asmodeus had thought about this and then gone over and inspected some of the seats. They had seemed satisfactory. He was now sitting and regarding the remains in the middle of the floor. Those were human. That meant the police ought to be called. Police meant questions. Police questions usually required lying.

Asmodeus normally liked questions but hated lying. It was a game with him, never lie, answer truthfully and see what happens. One of his favorites was, "What is in the drinks?"

He would laugh, his best Geoffrey Holder, and reply "Why sir! Nothing goes in our factory gates but pure clean water, the most luscious fruit, and a bit of sugar. And nothing comes out but our delicious drinks! Would you like a bun?" This was all true too.

The division manager ran the factory. The sugar went in a little pot by the coffee machine, the water was for the managers who refused to drink the muck that came out of the tap and the fruit was for the art department, to use as models for the labels. The actual ingredients came in by pipeline, and tank car up the railway spur, usually at night. (AN: The locals had required the train to not blow its whistle at night, to avoid disturbing their sleep. Their sleep would have been really disturbed if they had known what was in the tankers.) (AN: Orange Julius is a fine company who we really, really, don't want to get sued by. The branch in the mall is a separate operation run by Hell Enterprises Asia Inc, who OJ has being trying to get shut down for years. HEntAI have been and are being sued over the use of the OJ name and the case ought to have been open and shut in favor of the plaintiff but the defendant has all the best lawyers.)

Asmodeus sourly summoned two assistant associate managers. He pointed out the deplorable state of the food court and the impact on sales and bonuses that might ensue. He did not mention the corpse. He definitely did not tell them to stuff the corpse down the garbage shoot to the incinerator. He left to check stock in the back. His two workers waited for him to leave and then stuffed the corpse down the garbage shoot to the incinerator. In the back room, Asmodeus laughed (AN: hugely).

It is not clear if the events which occurred next could be considered unfortunate or not, but as the Assistant Associate Managers were stuffing the charred corpse into the garbage chute, a very small amount of Orange Julius formula spilled into its mouth.

The Assistant Associate Managers shoved and shoved, but it became increasingly more difficult to fit all the corpse into the chute.

It was swelling and putting off a bad stink.

“Unn,” cried one of the Assistant Associate Managers as he was absorbed into the body of the corpse. “Come back, my dear cabbage,” the other Assistant Associate Manager yelled as he dived into the corpse's body after his love. “I never knew,” came a muffled cry from somewhere inside. Relationships between co-workers were greatly discouraged at Orange Julius, Inc.

Two tentacles gripped either side of the chute and hefted itself out. It was huge, sticky and writhed gracefully like a stripper on a pole.

Orange orbs looked greedily at the OJ stand. “More,” the fearsome creature roared as its ramen-like tongue snaked out towards the Orange Julius dispenser.

“Not if I can help it,” Asmodeus leapt in front of the stand, slapping the tongue back like a scolded pup. The creature made a strangled sound, and began humming the tune from Surfin' Safari.

Asmodues took a step back in shock. “Cthulhu, is that you my old friend?”

ooooo000000ooooo

Kagome ground herself against Inuysha, moaning and howling, arching her back, so in the end, she was able to actually see the tentacles as they shot towards her, wrapped one around each arm and pulled. She shot backwards like a punctured balloon, and was dragged quickly back to the food court and then pinned to the wall by several tentacles by (AN: dun, dun, dun!) Naraku! He was Back! Asmodeus roared his disapproval, but another tentacle waved in the air towards him carrying (AN: dun, dun, dan!) an Orange Julius. “Paying customer!”

Asmodeus shrugged helplessly to Kagome and went back to wiping down the counter.

Naraku stared, weighing various gloats over in his head. "You're still wearing a dress!" he finally said, a bit lamely. "From all the commotion, I'd have thought you would have come back naked and covered in whipped cream and corn oil."

"Oh, well" he added, and ripped her dress from her. "You may wonder why I've dragged you away from your tryst. First, those noises were starting to annoy me. A little consideration for others costs nothing you know." Kagome, her feet dangling and short of breath merely glared.

"Second, I need you. I've decided to rebuild Kikiyo. I can assure you I do have the technology, but I wanted a live model this time. That's why you're still - um - alive." He giggled. He actually giggled! "And if I-boy tries to interfere, I rip your head off. Model and hostage too, see?"

Then he turned to the mass of clay and started work. Kagome thought he was going to start by picking out the condenser blades, but instead he just started shaping. Like to see Inuyasha cheat on me with those in her, she thought grimly. Then she thought, yucch.

Kikiyo, she thoguht, was going to be pissed!

TBC