InuYasha Fan Fiction / Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction / Urusei Yatsura Fan Fiction ❯ The Official Fanfiction University of Rumiko Takahashi! ❯ Detention ( Chapter 5 )

Chapter five!

Sorry this took really long. It was saved on my laptop, but the laptop had to be taken in to get repaired for some virus. Any one who requested to be in this chapter will be in the next. Sorry about that. :c

Did you know that hardly anyone reads Lum*Urusei Yatsura? If you get the chance, read it! It's really good and funny!

Cait's next couple days went by surprisingly fast, compared to her first day.

On Tuesday Akane had taught them in Cooking class. Cait decided she was going to find whoever signed her up for that and strangle them with Akane's dumplings. After cooking their own dishes, Akane had them partner up and taste their partner's. Since much of the class was not adjusting very well, and currently in counseling, they had an odd number, and Akane had "volunteered" to be Cait's partner. Of course, Cait had to taste hers in return. Her tongue had been numb since. She vaguely wondered how long it would take for her taste buds to regrow.

Biking class on Wednesday was actually fun. They were each given a tricycle, and told to ride once around the track. Although Cait did it with ease, several students fell over and were sent to the infirmary for head injuries. Benten was there to teach racing bikes, and Kagome, who was always riding her bike in the feudal age, offered tips on cross-country biking and such.

Thursday was the last day of fear for detention, as all of the week's detentions were served on Friday. The iota of students without one strived to be good for one more day. It was so hard, though, not to attempt to hug your favorite character ever if he/she's sitting right next to you. Now, with only Friday left to go, the students remaining DT-free felt sure they could withstand the temptation and escape the horrible plan the teachers had cooked up, hoping next week there wouldn't be one quite so bad.

Cait was still free of detention. It was mainly her fear of the evil grins the staff had been giving the past few days that kept her from making rude remarks about who deserved Inuyasha more, or hitting on some of the attractive male faculty. She had come very close to getting one, when Pia was in trouble for ripping up a poster of a dorky looking Mousse, and had come scampering into the dorm. The owner of the poster started hollering about "harboring criminals" and threatening to report her, but Cait "donated" one of Pia's posters to her, and she went away. Pia still wasn't talking to Cait after that.

Now it was Friday, and to celebrate the first week at this new University, there was going to be... a dance! All the students were really hyped up, until they found out that detention would be served simultaneously with the dance, so that if you had detention, you couldn't go to the dance. The entire student body was quickly falling into a state of depression, until Friday's breakfast. It had been during morning announcements, when the notice was made.

"Attention students!" Ataru's voice rang though the microphone. "You've probably all been wondering about tonight's dance and detention overlapping."

Many students groaned at the thought of the ominous detention hanging over their heads.

"Well, we've decided to change the schedule a little bit. Detention will start at 7:30, and continue for two hours. The dance will start at 8:30, and continue for two hours. So after serving your detention, if you still want to, you may go to the last hour of the dance! Sound fair?"

Cheers were heard from the crowd. "You mean we can still go to half of it?!" Kisa exclaimed.

"If you still want to, that is. You may prefer to go to bed early." Ataru smiled sweetly.

"No way!" Everyone was excited. They could still go to the dance!

That day, the dance was all anyone talked about. Rumors circulated about vast amounts of food and sodas for the students, a light-up dance floor, and many other fun things. Cait, Kisa, John, and Zeppo decided they would go together. Chelsea and Patrina were coming too. Pia was so busy trying to capture Mousse "The duck of romance" she almost considered skipping the dance, until she realized she still had detention from the breakfast incident, and decided to go anyway. Out of their group, Cait was the only one without detention. Kisa, of course, got one in Miroku's class, John accidentally turned Ranma into a girl while doing his funky poses, and then Kuno started chasing Ranma, who later gave him a detention for that. Zeppo got a detention from Ryouga, for looking too much like him and being better at wilderness orienteering than he was. That changed after Zeppo got cold water splashed onto him, and became as lost, if not more lost, than Ryouga himself. Cait was excited the most, first of all because she wouldn't be subjected to the horror of whatever the teachers were planning, and she got a full hour more of the dance than almost everyone else!

Until first period. Poetry with Tatewaki Kuno.

"Good morning, class!" Kuno came in, smiling, dressed up in what looked like an ancient samurai costume. "In this class you will learn how to write epic, dramatic, comedy, and most importantly... romantic poetry!" Most of the class groaned loudly. One said something like "girls have cooties!" but Kuno ignored him.

"Now, do any of you have any experience in the great and classic art of poetry?" Several shook their heads. "Well, it is my duty on this earth, to teach you, so one day your expertise in verse will flow as freely as my love for the pig tailed girl!!!!" He started spouting poetry about his love for her, and continued for several minutes, ending in a dramatic pose that would rival John's.

After collecting himself, he stood up, and said very softly, so anyone spying on them couldn't hear. "I will pay anyone an adequate amount of money for any information on my pigtailed goddess. Name, number, address? I have seen her at this university, so I now know that she is infatuated enough with me to drag herself to this wretched school to be near me. Did you know someone had the nerve to laugh at me when I asked about her to several of your teachers?"

The class kept quiet, afraid of what would happen if they told that his "Pig tailed goddess" was actually Kuno's rival, Ranma. Someone in the back raised their hand.

"How adequate will this payment be for pictures of her?"

Kuno stared coldly at the hand raiser. "Nabiki Tendo. Why have you sneaked into my class?"

Nabiki smiled. "I wanted to see what kind of teacher you were, Kuno. Seems you aren't as qualified as I thought you might be. In my Accounting class, we spend time <b> learning </b>, not bribing students." Cait noticed Zeppo was looking dreamily at Nabiki, and dazedly waving at her. "H-hi N-Nabiki!" he stuttered. Nabiki didn't hear, as she was looking at a certain wrinkled someone zooming into the room.

Cherry zoomed in, right on time, knocking out Kuno. The students perked up. Nabiki sighed. "Don't do that, he still has a class to teach." The students moaned.

Cherry pulled out a bottle labeled "Cologne's Lil' spray bottle of instant consciousness." He sprayed it over Kuno, and counted twenty seconds on his watch. Kuno came to, right on the dot.

"What happened?" he said, drowsily. Noticing he was still in his class, he immediately composed himself, and shooed Cherry and Nabiki out of the room. Noticing time was running out he announced the homework. "Now class," Kuno proclaimed "We didn't have much of a class today, so I will give you an easy assignment. He started to write on the board. "To see your experience in the art of poetry, you will each write a poem. The topics are: An epic poem about a handsome kendo champion and a beautiful pigtailed princess, a dramatic poem about a attractive kendo artist and a lovely pigtailed goddess, a comic poem about a good-looking kendo artist and his gorgeous pigtailed wife, or..." he smiled "A romance poem about an astonishingly attractive kendo artist, and his love life with a beauteous pig-tailed girlfriend!"

The class stared in silence.

Kuno was confused. "Don't you like that assignment?" They remained quiet. "The best ones will be recited to my steady girlfriend, the pig-tailed girl, in person! Doesn't that sound nice? You'd like that, wouldn't you?" They remained still. Kuno was starting to get annoyed.

Cait summoned up some courage, and raised her hand. "We don't like it because it's all a get-together of you and the pig-tailed girl."

Kuno grabbed his sword. "Now you DIEEEEE!!!" He threw something at her. Cait picked it up. At first she was afraid it would be a bouquet of roses, like what he did to Ranma, but instead it was a piece of paper. She gasped at what was written on it.

"N...No! You... this can't be ...no!" Cait covered her mouth in horror, and recoiled at the sight on the paper.

"That's right, Miss Wilson. Detention!" Kuno grinned evilly as Cait sank down in her seat.

*************

7:30 PM, Friday.

*************

Every single student, excluding one or two, was lined up outside. The people to be administering the detention were Inuyasha, Lum, Shampoo, and Ranma. They were smirking evilly (That happens a lot) at the students. Behind them was a huge red curtain. Lum stepped forward, and addressed the mass of pupils.

"Students of OFURT. You are here because you have been very naughty." She glared at many of the boys who had tried to grope her in the eye. "So we have cooked up a special detention for you!" She flew up to the top of the curtain, and pulled it down. The students gasped. On the other side were rows and rows of computers!

"Not so fast." Lum continued, shooing away the students running toward them.

"But I wanna read my favorite stories!" one whined. Lum ignored him, and after making sure all of them were a safe distance from the computers, Inuyasha and Ranma gave each of the students a number, and lined them up in numerical order.

Shampoo announced the rest of the instructions. "Now students take co...computer with own number on."

Cait sat down at a computer next to a boy with short chestnut hair and a black jacket. He smiled at her, and she smiled back.

"My name's Nate. Who are you?"

"I'm Cait."

"No talk! Students now be hush-hush!" Shampoo yelled loudly. "Now you look at screen. See it is having visu...visualation thing."

Cait stared intently at the screen, which was changing from blue to green. Someone in front of her was trying to exit it, wanting to get to the internet.

"EEEEE!!!" was heard, and the student scooted back from the computer quickly, holding his hand which had been clutching the mouse. It appeared to be burned...but how...

"Students now notice that if you try to stop computer it shock you! Also if you turn away or close eyes, it also shock!" Cait felt the sudden urge to look away. She stole a glance to her right, along with most of the other students, only to feel a burning sensation coming from her hand, and rippling through her arm. "EEEEE!" was heard around the group, as Shampoo smiled.

Ranma took over then. "Make sure you keep your eyes on the screen, and don't look away!"

Assorted "EEEEE!"'s were heard throughout the group. Cait looked at the screen. It looked like a Chibi-Cait was on the screen! Entranced, Cait peered closer.

"Alright, if you've ever written a Mary-sue, you should be seeing a Chibi-version of yourself on the screen. I almost forgot something!" Ranma slapped his head in frustration. "Make <b> sure </b> you put on your head phones!"

Cait looked around for a pair, only to be shocked again. (EEEEE!) "They're on the right of your moniter, just reach towards them, reach..." Everyone tried to find their headphones without looking away, though a couple "EEEEE"'s were heard. After they secured their head phones (Or as Cait supposed, since she was still staring at her screen, Ranma spoke again, only it was muffled this time, by the headphones.

"This is our new way of punishing students, thanks to that ridiculous rule saying we aren't allowed to hurt them ourselves. So at least it won't be US hurting your, oh well, just keep on staring at your screen, you should probably be seeing someone on the screen, probably someone of the oppisite sex, and even more probably someone you may have... written a Mary-sue about with you? Am I right? You know I am."

Cait noticed a Chibi Inuyasha standing next to the Chibi-Cait.

"I should probably stop announcing this, since it'll be different for all of you, but it will make those characters the oppisite of what you made them. Like, if you wrote some totally OOC fic of Sessho-maru (We seem to use his anti-socialness a lot around here) and made him all lovey-dovey with you, (God, who would want that?) then he would be even more nasty and destructive and overall mean than normal! How is that possible? I don't know. Good luck!"

Cait, having absorbed very little of Ranma's instructions, was busy staring at the screen. Chibi-Cait was smiling at Chibi-Inuyasha, and trying to put her arm around him. Chibi-Inuyasha slapped her arm away. Cait could feel a burning sensation on her arm.

"Did I forget to tell you that anything happening to your Chibi self happens to you?" Cait heard Ranma's voice. Darn it. Judging by what went on in her fics, this was going to get pretty nasty.

Chibi-Inuyasha proceeded to kick Chibi-Cait in the shins several times, before stomping on her, "Demon begone"-ing her, and various other attacks. Cait lost track of time, her whole body ached from beatings, and also shockings from looking away.

It was such a long, long time before she heard Lum shout "Time's up!" and the Chibi-Cait and Chibi-Inuyasha on the screen vanished.

Cait had been one of the lucky ones, with only bruises and shallow cuts. Cait's Sues had stopped at kissing, but she could guess from the wounds who the lemon-writers in this crowd were. One girl's arm had been broken in several places, another couldn't walk, and a boy (Cait guessed he was the one who wrote the infamous Benten/Lum) was just flopped on the grass, twitching.

"I never knew a University could be so violent..." Cait mused to herself, struggling to walk back over to where the rest of the students and teachers were gathering.

The teachers who had been administering the detention were acting uncannily cheerful. Ranma smiled at them. "Has any one learned anything from your detention?" The students mumbled yes. "Are you going to make more of an effort in the future not to get one?" They nodded their heads automatically, too weary to argue. "Good. Now anyone who still feels up to it may go to the dance."

*****

Cait flopped down on her bed, too exhausted to move. She, like everyone else, had not even bothered to go to the dance, instead she had been trying to get back to her floor using the stairs. The elevators were broken somehow. Some students had collapsed, but no one had as far to climb as the fifth floor except the girls on Cait's floor, and the boys on the other side. As she lay down on her bed, ready to fall asleep, even though it was only nine, one thought crossed her mind.

"I don't think all of the teachers have our best interests in mind. . ."

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Also, I intend on keeping this a Rumiko Takahashi-based story, so no characters from other stuff! Actually, I might feature a couple other characters as substitutes next chapter, tell me which ones you want! Nothing big of course. This is the Official Fanfiction University of RUMIKO TAKAHASHI, of course. But I might bend that a tiny bit. Just this once, though!

Yeah, also a lot of review don't say the quality of a story. I know you mean well, saying that more people should review, but it doesn't really matter that much to me. If a lot of "This is my fav story! Plz update ^_^r" makes a story worth while, I'm not sure. . . *damn* think of something intelligent to say here, Meowm! Also, this is for my mediaminer readers, I appreciate a review, but giving a story 10 on everything doesn't tell me much. My spelling isn't a ten, I've spotted a couple errors myself. I know my story could be better, and could you please try to tell me how? That would help. Thanks to the people who do, and remember, if you want to be in it, just holler! :)