InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ A Sealed Fate ❯ Chapter 23

Kikyou had started out early that day. The sun was shining and the temperature agreeable. And best of all, she had felt the familiar feeling of relief, the one that let her know that girl had returned to the other side.

Inuyasha had not come back last night. She had not been able to find him after he dashed off. He made a silly excuse and told her to wait in the hut. As if she could do that with Kagome nearby!

She kept her movements quiet as she trailed behind him. Had he had his demon senses, he would have known immediately. He could always pick up her scent. He could always feel her presence. They were connected after all.

She froze when she saw him. He stood away from the group, from his friends… from the woman he desired. The blackness of the forest allowing him to remain unseen. Perhaps his scent changed on human nights, that it did not alert the other demons he was nearby. Or perhaps they simply didn't care. They all seemed to be enjoying themselves. They laughed in a way she had never seen since she entered their group. There was a carefree, easy feeling to this impromptu get together. There was none of the tension that she endured when they sat round the fire while hunting for shards.

Damn that bitch. She still held a place in these people's hearts! Still plagued their minds! Why couldn't he just let go?

She had all the things that Kikyou wanted desperately. She had always yearned for a friend such as Sango, faithful to the death. And Miroku, like an older brother, someone who wanted to care for her. It had always been she that had to care for others. And that little fox Shippo, who sat so snuggly in her arms, constantly talking about her sweet smell, showing off with pride that he had a place of honor on her lap.

Children had always loved her, and she them. The fox was the first to show disdain. Although it went against her very nature to befriend the kit, she had wanted to. She could plainly tell that Inuyasha fostered the boy, and despite their strained relationship, Kikyou could tell that he loved him.

She had figured gaining the foxes love would be a step closer to winning Inuyashas heart. That damned brat was so stuck on her reincarnation that he wouldn't budge an inch! And he nagged about her smell. Death. He always said she reeked like death!

Inuyasha never showed an aversion to the way she smelled, but other demons had commented on it before the child had. She knew it was true. He must have been bothered by the scent of death she gave off. But he loved her so much he was willing to overlook it. That surely was a sign of his devotion, was it not?

And yet, there he stood, watching Kagome from afar. She could see clearly in the night that he longed to be there. She saw his fists balled tightly by his sides. He was struggling with what to do. He was struggling with his love for her.

That damned bitch!

Inuyasha was everything. She was all that she had left in this world. She had been changed by him. Before he came into her life, it was one of routine. She had wanted nothing more than to do her duty as the maiden of the Shikon and care for her younger sister.

It was a selfless life and she had not minded.

Not until he made his way into her world.

No one had spoken to her as a woman. No one had spent time with her as a human, not just the keeper of the jewel. He shattered her world just as the shikon had been split into tiny fragments.

Suddenly her fated role as a maiden felt consuming. Being a priestess was a curse instead of a blessing. She was envious of the woman in the fields, the wives who made breakfast for their families and laid at night with their husbands.

She yearned to be ordinary.

She couldn't be that with Inuyasha, not as a hanyou. The village would never accept him. They would chase them out before the frame work of the hut was ever completed.

Would they look down on her, if she found a replacement for the jewel? If she sought high and low, she was sure she could find another priestess to take her place. But what then? What or her and Inuyasha?

Or she could kill two birds with one stone. She could let Inuyasha wish for humanity, and the jewel would disappear, freeing her of her duty and he if his mixed blood.

A foolproof plan.

And when he ran her down with his claws, when she had shot him with her arrow, she had still loved him. She loved the man who was to be her savior. In the end, he was still freeing her. Death was better than what she had been trapped in.

But she had been brought back, recalled from the grave in an angry way. She was born again in anger, her soul raging for vengeance. She still had trouble taming it.

To look at him now, in his human form… that was all she had ever wanted. To live a life by his side I this state. And with those violet eyes, her soul flamed with hatred as he watched her reincarnation.

Once the sun began to rise, she left him alone. She had to move away from him, otherwise her cover would have been blown. Each step felt heavy. She wanted desperately to know what was going to happen to those friends of his.

At last, she was the one person he could depend on! She was the one person who had not kept him in the dark, the one person who had not betrayed him! He would finally come to her willingly.

It did not take long.

The hanyou was making his way towards her.

“Kikyou, I was looking for you.”

The miko smiled.

`At last…'

~.~

Jiro was beside himself. He felt on edge with anticipation. He had told Kagome to take the time she needed to consider his proposal, and he had meant what he said. He didn't mind waiting for her answer. So long as it was yes.

Until now, he had never been the one to put his feelings on the line. With his handsome looks and natural athletic abilities he shined in middle and high school. He regularly found notes inside his locker from girls asking to meet to confess their feelings.

Most of them he declined, a few he dated. He always tried to reject a girls offer with sensitivity, he hated to see their faces tinged with sadness. But he couldn't help saying no; he wouldn't string girls along if he had no feelings for them. No one had really made an impression on him, a lasting one at least. Not until he met Kagome.

Something about her was different. Was it the way she held herself? As if she was unable to be happy, as if she was trying to make the best of a terrible situation? Or was it the way her laughter rang in his ears, like a melody he wanted to replay over and over?

He would often catch her sitting under the sacred tree, a far off look in her eyes. He wondered what made her so contemplative, so removed. And when he would try to rouse her from her musings, she would gift him with a dazzling smile. It made his stomach flip. It left him unsettled.

He wanted more than anything to figure her out. To hold her close. To take whoever plagued her thoughts and beat them mercilessly. He wanted all of her. Her moods, her bad jokes, her naïve belief that people were good, her feisty attitude, her loving smiles… her love.

He had never worked so hard for anything, for anyone. He was at a loss how to woo a woman. They were always the ones to come to him. But with Kagome… it was as if she didn't even realize he was a man! She was too preoccupied with that asshole ex-boyfriend of hers to see anything beyond him.

It made him green with envy.

How could anyone treat her so terribly? What kind of man was this mysterious lecher that he would toss Kagome, KAGOME! Aside? Who was this other woman in her tragic love triangle that that jerk could possibly chose her over Kagome?

Whatever.

All the better for him. It was his loss that he treated the girl so coldly, so brutally that she let him. Jiro was glad to pick up the pieces he left behind. He would ever treat her heart so recklessly. For the first time in his life, Jiro was in love.

He worried how this would change things at the shrine. He couldn't continue to live here once they began to date. That would just be improper. He would have to find an apartment of his own.

His own place, to take Kagome too…

He idly wondered if she would be satisfied, with his choice of career. She was going to go to university to become a doctor, and he would stay here to tend a shrine? He panicked, concerned she would leave him behind.

Jiro ran his fingers through his hair. He was getting ahead of himself. Kagome had not even responded to him yet and he was already planning their future. He had to get it together!

He walked outside and began to walk the grounds. A few of the regular visitors were paying their respects and smiled, careful to give them their space. He did not wish to interrupt their prayer.

He had a laundry list of things to do today, and for this he was glad. Busy work was just what he needed to get his mind off the beauty showering just a few feet away in the house.

~.~

He braced himself. This was a conversation he had been putting off for far too long. His head swam with guilt. Perhaps if he had been honest with her from the start it would not have come to this. It was his fault for leading her on; his fault that she hoped too high.

He had always wanted to sacrifice for the miko; he would gladly put himself and his desires last without hesitation. He owed her that much. But by doing so, he had also put the woman he truly loved last. By bending to Kikyous will all these years, he had unintentionally made Kagome second best.

No more. It had to stop now.

Inuyasha had a plan to win back the girl. He knew that she would come on the new moon to see their friends once again. He only had one chance.

They would greet her at the well and bring her to the camp site that they had set up. Inuyasha would be waiting for her there.

If she tried to run, he had the word of his `friends' that they would retrieve her. He had made Sango promise to convince Kagome to speak to him if it came down to it. He had even gotten the foxes word, although begrudgingly, that he would offer his support if called upon.

The pieces would fall into place. There had to be no room for error. He only had one opportunity to fix his mistakes and heal her heart. Both of their hearts.

The first step was to confront Kikyou. He was not exactly sure what he would say,, other than the obvious. He could not continue doing… well whatever it was they were doing. Would she stay in the village, or would she continue to wander and drift as before?

He had made up his mind about one thing though- he would stay in the village. They had accepted him, wanted him even, and were constructing a hut for him to live in.

It was a place for Kagome. It was what he could offer her.

All he wanted to do was provide for her, protect her… love her. The images of her as a house wife danced in his head. She was bent down tending to the garden, looking over her shoulder smiling as she welcomed him home. Kagome was standing over the pot as it cooked, testing the food with great consideration; his palate was sensitive and she knew better than to spice things too heavily. He saw her taking his clawed hand, leading him to the futon, a seductive smile on her lips and a lustful look in her eyes…

Yes, he needed this home for Kagome.

When the town had approached him, he had never seen any other woman here but her. Not once did it cross his mind that Kikyou could be the person in his fantasies. It was always Kagome.

But more than his own selfish motives, he knew Kagome would want to be close to the monk and slayer. She was comfortable in this village. The people here knew and respected her, and she had watched children grow and new babies brought into the world. This was her home. He refused to give that up for her.

What if Kikyou decided to stay? Anxiety and fear gnawed at him as he sought out the miko. There was no easy solution for this. There was no correct way to shatter her fantasy and break her heart.

When he laid eye on her, he felt sick. Her scent assaulted him, his guilt rising.

“Kikyou, I was looking for you.” He stated simply.

“Oh? How unusual, it is typically I that has to seek you out, Inuyasha. Whatever is the matter?”

He furrowed his eyebrows together. That sentence had stung with truth. He never sought her company, never looked for her presence. He had always been unworthy to love her.

“Kikyou… this is- damn it, this is really hard to talk about.” He grumbled.

“Just say what you need to Inuyasha. I am listening.” She said, standing up straight. She looked serious, as always.

“…I can't be with you any more Kikyou.

“Excuse me?” She said, rage bristling in her eyes. She had not been expecting this.

“I meant what I said. I can't… I can't be with you anymore. What we had 50 year ago, it will always be special to me… but that is as far as I can go. I can't return your feelings, Kikyou. I can't go to hell with you, and I can't live with you like you want. I know that I promised, but I'm sorry. I will defeat Naraku for what he did to us, for taking your life. But that is where it has to end.”

“What are you saying, Inuyasha? Why have you decided this so suddenly?”

“I… I am in love with Kagome.” He said, his voice small.

“You are not. You merely are obsessed with her because she is gone. It is a fleeting fancy, and it will pass soon.” She cut in.

“No, its not like that at all. I… I loved her the entire time. I… I think I loved her from the moment I met her.” He sounded small, fragile.

“Ha! What nonsense you sprout. You cannot even say this declaration of love without shame in your voice.”

“Shame? I'm ashamed because of how things fucking turned out! I'm ashamed because up until now Ive been a poor fucking excuse for a man! But that stops today.”

“What do you mean?”

“Kikyou, I am going to get Kagome back. I am going to live with her as husband and wife.”

“And how to propose you do that? In case you have forgotten Inuyasha, the girl left you.”

“She has a jewel shard. She has been visiting Sango and the others for months.”

“I did not ask how she got here, Inuyasha. I was aware of her visits.”

“You… you knew…” Disbelief ringing in his voice.

“Of course. She and I are connected. I felt the pull of my soul the moment she crossed into our time. I felt her before she stepped foot out of that well.”

“K…Kikyou….”

“What I asked was, how do you intend to get her back Inuyasha? In case you have forgotten, she left you. She does not want you. Do you honestly think that after a year, nothing has changed for her? Perhaps in her time she is content and living happily. Perhaps in her world she is married-“

A fierce growl cut her short. She took a step back in surprise. The dog demons eyed tinged with red. He was battling for control. Just the idea that Kagome was married to someone else threatened to send him over the brink.

“Shut the fuck up.” He rasped out, taking deep breaths. Her smell. It assaulted him. It made his demon roar for release. It screamed at her that she was the enemy. She was unnatural. She was dead.

“Inuyasha, if you intend to leave me, I will make good on the threat I spoke of before.” She tried. She knew the demon was ruled by guilt. This was her foolproof plan.

“I don't want you to do that, I don't want that for you. All I have ever wanted was for you to be at peace. But… but I am not going to let you dictate how I live my life anymore. All these years, I pushed her away because I felt so guilty about everything. I cant fucking do it anymore! If you kill yourself, yeah, I'll feel guilty.” He stopped to look her in her eye. His amber orbs radiated determination. “But that's not going to stop me from getting Kagome back.”

“Inuyasha I-“ She clutched her hand to her chest. What was that girl doing back here, now of all times?! “ Inuyasha!” She called, making a desperate move to latch onto him.

His ears swerved, picking up the sounds of the village. He heard her plea, saw the look of pain cross her features. He made a slight movement to ask what exactly had happened.

And then it happened.

Her scent. It wafted on the wind. It was unmistakable. Wildflowers. Kagome. His eyes were stained red. He vaguely heard Kikyou calling his name.

He could care less. The instant his nose picked up her scent, he was on his feet, speedily bringing him to the well.

He watched dumbstruck as Miroku reached down into the well. Shippo bounced around excitedly, asking what Kagome was doing there.

She threw one leg over the well and looked up.

Their eyes locked. Neither one could breathe. Had time actually stopped?

What was she doing here? Didn't the monk say that she only came on the night of the new moon? What was she doing here now?

He had a plan damn it! He was going to talk to her at night, in his human form when his demon would not be raging inside of him. He was going to apologize, beg for her forgiveness. He was going to tell her how much he missed her, how much he loved her.

Just like his fucking wench to mess up his plans!

But here she was. Sitting in front of him frozen on the well. Did she plan on retreating? He took a deep breath, as if trying to confirm her existence. He was terrified his eyes were lying to him.

“Inu…Inuyasha…”

In one swift movement, he ran to her. A blur of silver and red made their way to the well and grabbed her in his arms. Strong hands hoisted her up over his shoulder. She squeaked at the sudden change and began to sputter his name incoherently.

The hanyou turned his eyes to his friends.

“If anyone thinks of following us, I swear I will fucking kill you.”