InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ All That Time Allows ❯ The Darkness ( Chapter 12 )

All that Time Allows

By mishi

Chapter 12

The Darkness

 

She was almost asleep buy time he entered the bedroom. She hadn't intended to let herself doze off. He had a towel around his waist and was holding his clothes in his arms. He had completely dried his hair, but hadn't bothered to put his clothes on. The idea of it was funny to her.

“Why are you only wearing a towel?” she asked as she rubbed her eyes.

 

“You didn't mind that I was naked in the bath tub.” He removed the towel and crawled on the bed.

 

“You're being bad Inuyasha.” Her hands covered her eyes.

 

He positioned himself between her legs and leaned over her. She lowered her hands just a little. “If I just look into his eyes and not any lower, I will be fine.”

 

“You peeked,” he chuckled.

 

It was enough to lower her defenses. He pressed his body to hers and energy poured over her body. Her body responded immediately with a rush of power.

 

“Why is that happening?” she asked.

 

“Is it really that important to know? I'm part youkai.” He insisted as if it should explain everything.

 

“But why would power be coming off me too? I'm human,” she buried her fingers in his hair. The power had made it harder to resist him. Regardless of how much she wanted to deny it, something deep inside of her wanted his youkai. The knowledge was frightening for her, but she was becoming too excited for the fear to make much difference.

 

“You're supposed to be a miko?” His hand entered her top. His hand moved slowly as it made its way up to find her right breast.

 

“You are being really aggressive aren't you? Remember that I am messy right now.”

 

His manner became very serious, and his voice was deeper then normal. “You're completely healed and I don't mind getting messy.”

 

He traced his nose lightly along her check before kissing her. His tongue entered her mouth, and she pulled him closer to her body. Power exploded between them. It caused them both to gasp. Inuyasha's claws dug into the bed as his body shuttered. He let out a deep groan. “Kagome,” he was straining to speak.

 

Kagome struggled to catch her breath. For a split second she had lost control over all her senses. Her body was reeling from the sensation and she could not stop it. It was as if a door had swung open in her mind. The power swirling around them had become solid objects in her mind. They were two forms pressing against each other. She could see it all as it was happening. It was as if the two forms were fighting. However, it was too sexual in nature to be a true battle.

 

`This feels so good…what do I do? His youkai scares me, but I want him so much. How do I make the fighting stop?' She could hear Inuyasha saying something, but she couldn't make out the words. He was panicked, but she couldn't understand why. `I can't give in to this. Something is wrong,' she thought as she fought to understand what he was saying.

 

“Please, please,” he was saying it over and over. His lips were pressed against her neck. “I have to have you.”

 

The energy was growing. It was causing him to push his body against hers with more force. She knew that it was causing him pain. Understanding why was not what she needed at the moment. She needed to know how to make it stop. She did the only thing that she could think to do. She kissed his shoulder as she lowered her hand and forced it between their bodies. She took hold of his penis and gently caressed it. He whimpered in protest, but his body relaxed. The energy between them instantly lost some of its pressure, but not its intensity. She had her senses back, but the feel of his body was enough to drive her insane.

 

Inuyasha was quite for moment. However, his claws were still gripping into the bed. His breath was heavy against her neck. She had the control she needed to restore control. She released him and quickly pushed him off of her. She stood a few feet away from the bed and watched as he cried and curled his body into a ball. Her body was still throbbing. The power wouldn't subside. She knew then that it would not until it was satisfied in some way. She wanted Inuyasha and something inside her was begging to give into him. She removed her tank top and picked up the towel that Inuyasha had worn into the room.

 

“What are you doing?” He grawled and pressed himself against the wall as she move to return to the bed.

 

“You want this to stop don't you?” She reached out to him, “I think I know how to make it stop for now.”

 

“It is my youkai, Kagome. I don't know what I might do if you don't stay way.”

 

Each time he had been transformed by the youkai blood in the past, he had been left a mindless beast. A beast that was content to fight and kill until it was killed.

 

“Get the Tetsusaiga,” He pleaded. The sword was the only thing that could stop his youkai from taking over.

 

“Do you actually think you will transform if come any closer?” She asked as she backed up a step.

 

“I don't think I will transform. This is different. It wants…” He couldn't say it. Instead, he closed his eyes and pressed himself as close to the wall as he possibly could. Through clinched teeth he ordered her to get the sword.

 

She opened the closet and grabbed the sword. She watched him cradle it for several minutes. It wasn't helping him, and her heart was breaking as she watched him struggle. She could see the power swirling in the room around them. Even if the Tetsusaiga could control the youkai's power, it did nothing to control what was coming from her body.

 

She forced herself to step forward. She had to make it stop. Her mind was made up. She was not sure if it was the right thing to do, but she couldn't stand seeing him like this. She got back into the bed, and taking his penis into her hand, began to finish what she had started moments before.

 

He grabbed her wrist, but she protested, “I don't think your youkai wants to hurt me.”

“You have no idea what it can do, or what it wants.”

 

She waited for him to tell her to stop, but it was his youkai's power that responded. The power caused both their bodies to shake. “See? Let me do this. It will stop. Your youkai wants this, and something in me wants it too.”

 

She had to initiate the kiss, because he was still too afraid to move. She put so much passion into the kiss that he loosened his grip on her wrist, but he didn't completely let go.

After a few moments the power around them softened. All the fighting had stopped. He let go of her wrist so he could put the sword between the pillow and the headboard. His fear had passed. He was no longer thinking. He was back to playing along with his youkai, and giving into his desire.

 

She was amazed by how clearly she could see all that was happening. His power rubbed against hers as plainly as his hand no her breast. There was a thin white line were the powers were touching. It looked as if they were blending together in some places. Thes vision shattered with the force of his orgasm. The room went dark around them. The only light in the room came from her opened windows.

 

This time she was the one to take care of the mess. She puttered around the room doing last minute things before going to bed. He had already covered himself with the sheet. She hadn't noticed that he had been crying until she climbed under the sheets herself.

 

It hadn't occurred to her before that she might have violated him in some way. She was afraid now that that could've been the case. “I'm sorry, Inuyasha. I didn't know what else to do.”

 

“You did what you thought would help.” He turned over on to his back, “I think I should go back to my world tomorrow.”

 

“What? You can't leave me.” She pleaded with him, “I won't tease you anymore. Just don't leave me.”

 

Now she was crying too. `He can't leave me. I can't lose him. Please, don't let him leave. I will do anything as long as he doesn't leave me.'

 

“That's not it. I can't control this. I don't want to hurt you.”

 

“Then don't leave me. Don't ever leave me.” She put her hands over her face. “It's not all your youkai. It's coming from both of us. I just have better control over what is happening to me. I can see the power that surrounds us, but I don't know what to do to make it stop.”

 

“I won't be able to control it if that happens again. I won't be able to stop.” He confessed as he swallowed the lump in his throat.

 

“You couldn't control it this time. I gave your youkai what it wanted…or at least what it was willing to settle for.”

 

“You don't understand what I mean.” He set up and shook his head, “I wanted to take you. The youkai almost forced me to take you. It wasn't asking permission. It didn't care. I could have…I could've forced you onto your stomach…whether you wanted to or not.”

 

She sat up and put her arms around him, causing him to flinch, “That was why you were in so much pain.”

 

“My youkai maybe satisfied for now, but it will try again the next time you get excited.”

 

“Don't you mean, the next time we get excited?”

 

“I can control it until your power hits me, but when that happens I can't help myself. Something about you is…I don't know how to explain it.”

 

“Calling it,” she admitted.

 

He looked at her, “What?”

 

“I think both powers are trying to mix into each other. It's almost like they are trying to become one, or destroy each other. I can't figure out which. I do know that whatever the source of my power is, it wants your youkai. It wants your youkai like I want you.”

 

“Then what is holding it back?”

 

“I don't know. It could be me,” she didn't want to tell him she was afraid. “The next time it happens I will let you make love to me.”

 

“You are afraid of this. I know you are.”

 

“How do you know that?” Her shock made her let him go.

 

“That was why I fought so hard. I felt it.”

 

“I don't care if it frightens me. I just don't want you to leave me.”

 

“You think that I want to leave you for good?” He looked at her, “I'm not doing that. I want to find out why this is happening. I don't want to hurt you.”

 

“We still don't have to wait. The wedding is not going to be a real wedding anyway.”

 

“What?” His eyes narrowed.

 

She hugged her knees as she tried to think of something to say. She was hoping that she would never have to tell him, but she had to go and stick her foot in her mouth. How could she explain to him that she wouldn't be his wife according to the laws of the modern world? Inuyasha didn't have a birth certificate or ID. He didn't even have a family name. They would appear to be married as far as everyone could tell. Grandpa would be satisfied.

 

He was too tired to deal with the silence. He let himself fall back on the bed. “We have gone through all this for nothing,” he whispered.

 

She turned to look over her shoulder at him. “No, we will be making Mama and Grandpa very happy. The wedding will be real for everyone who sees it. We will just have to work a lot of things out at a later time.”

 

“Kagome, I can't do this anymore. It hurts…too much. I have to have you completely or not at all. You're my wife, or you aren't.”

 

`I should have told him I was afraid. We could've made love yesterday or the day before, but I was so stupid! That has to be why the powers were fighting each other. I'm letting the fear hold them back from each other. I'm doing this.'

 

She wanted to cry some more. None of this was supposed to be this hard. What was supposed to bring them together was only tearing them apart. It wasn't fair. How was she going to relax and work out her feelings when she had to please everyone? None of this was helping her fear of loosing him. If his youkai couldn't be controlled they might not be able to be together, regardless of how much they wanted to be. If she couldn't get passed her fear of his youkai, they would never see if he could control it.

 

She knew they could never go back to the way they were and she didn't want to try. `In the eyes of God I am his wife already. Soon I'll be his wife in the eyes of everyone else. I have to remind myself that that's all that matters. We'll just have to work out the details later.'

 

He took her arm and gently pulled her down to lay beside him. “Try to sleep. We can deal with all this tomorrow,” he assured her and kissed her good night.

 

Several times during the night, Kagome awoke to find Inuyasha's nose in her tummy. Each time she would gently guide his head back to his pillow. He never once woke up. He would only let out a few whimpers and slide his hand under her tank top. He was restless until he could find bare flesh. She had helped him put his hands under the top more then once.

 

****

 

Kagome was still sleeping when he left the bedroom. He had put on his kimono without waking her. As he walked down the hall to the backdoor, he could hear Mama in the kitchen. She was getting ready to make her famous Saturday morning breakfast. He allowed himself to smile as he thought about her fussing around the kitchen. He stopped to take a deep breath before trying to sneak past her. He stood for a long moment looking at his kimono. Mama had sewn up the spot that had been ripped by Kage's attack. He was amazed at how good a job she had done of fixing it for him. He let his smile widen. `I really do love Mama. She's the mother I lost.'

 

Although he had taken extra care to make as little noise as possible, Mama noticed him at the back door before he was able to sneak away. She walked towards him with a smiling face as always. “I was just about to wake everyone.”

 

“Could you tell Kagome I will be back soon?” he asked as he turned to go.

 

“Why didn't you tell her?” She closed the distance to stand directly in front of him, “Did something happen?”

 

“No, I need to go back to my world to test the well. I didn't want to wake her up.”

 

“You don't lie very well, Inuyasha,” she said as she frowned at him. “I can guess that you don't want to tell me what happed, but will you tell me if I will still have a son after you walk out that door?”

 

The question hit him like a punch in the gut. He hadn't expected her to be so forward. He couldn't help but let it show on his face. He stumbled over his words several times before he managed to answer her, “I love her. I would die before I'd ever hurt her. I would die before I'd hurt any of you.”

 

“I know you are afraid. I knew you wanted to run away the night we brought her home, but you made the right choice in staying. Don't doubt that, son. You need her as much as she needs you.” She put her arms around him and gave him a good squeeze for encouragement, “Don't give up, Inuyasha.”

 

Over the past two months he had become far more emotional than he had ever wanted to be. He hated it a great deal, but he couldn't help but be emotional around Mama and Kagome. He fought back his tears and returned the hug. “I won't give up, Mama. I won't be gone any longer than I have too. I don't know how long it will take, but I make sure to be back before dinner,” he promised as he let her go. “Maybe I will have some friends for you to meet.”

 

“Don't make me come after you.” She said as she teasingly shook her finger at him. She was determined to make him smile before leaving the house. Lucky for him, it wasn't a difficult thing for her to accomplish.