InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Drown ❯ Chapter 24: Save me from myself ( Chapter 24 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Title: Drown
Author: DeityOfDeath
Archive: Yes please...
Pairings: Inu Yasha/Kouga, Kouga/Ayame, Inuyasha/Kouga/Ayame, mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/Kikyo InuYasha/OC
Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi
rating: NC-17/R
Spoilers: Most likely.
Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, SPOILERS!
Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies.

Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review!

The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Drown" by Bring Me The Horizon

Chapter 24: Save me from myself

Winter had descended on the caves and I found myself with two very needy boys.

Ranken and Yuki hardly left my side as if afraid I too would vanish from their lives. I tried my hardest to reassure them and the most reassuring thing I could do was to do as we always had. I knew hiragana and katakana and I taught them what I knew. They had reached the age where it became a game to see who could remember the most. Both could write their names on paper in hiragana; the rare times we were gifted with paper from Sesshomaru, and both would proudly show any who would stop and listen. We often practiced on the dirt floor or using charcoal and thin pieces of wood. Teaching them kept my mind clear and allowed me to keep their minds busy.

Kouga preened at showing off his knowledge of kanji. I was unable to finish my schooling with my mother's death and my life on the run but now I seemed to learn beside my sons each week as a new kanji was introduced to us. Sesshomaru visited when the weather allowed and after seeing the boys' enthusiasm for learning he brought slates, chalk and books.

When it seemed like they're energy was overflowing Kouga, Ginta or Hakaku would often take them outside where they could release they're pent up energy. Every so often I would join them but with the little princess still much too little I tended to be overly cautious and often kept inside the caves with her.

She grew little by little and after two full weeks she fully opened her baby blue eyes. It was at that time that she was given a clean bill of health from Koname and Kouga and I decided on the name Himawari. Though she was named “sunflower” her nickname became “Hime” because she was our “princess”.

We found our happiness again and yet our conflict wasn't finished.

In the deepest part of the caves at the very bottom, Kiba was locked away and his fate still remained in my hands. It was something that stayed at the back of my mind and Kouga gave me til the first day of warm weather to decide his fate. I knew he had to die. He had a troubled past and I understood a small amount of his pain but where I and others had put their past behind them and used its lessons to better ourselves he had chosen to let it eat away at him and make him a monster. He had so much blood and innocence on his hands.

I had decided that I would go see Kiba in his prison and so I left Himawari with Kira and Sachi on a day when the boys were already outside playing in the snow. I wore my thickest hakama set which was a set in a deep plum with a heavy black fur cloak that almost swallowed me in its size but it was warm and somewhat comforting since it smelled of both Kouga and Ayame. Both my Hakama and the cloak had been gifts from them.

To get to the area where Kiba was imprisoned you had to first leave the caves and follow a path outside that lead to the very back of the cave. There I found a guard who looked me in the eye and nodded as he led me through the low and narrow entrance. I followed behind him as we went down steep steps carved into the stone of the cave as they led further down into darker and more damp surroundings, the way was lit by oil and tar soaked torches and the farther I went the darker it became.

The guard was a bulky wolf youkai by the name of Kito. He was tanned with a multitude of scars, though the only visible ones were along his neck, head and face as the rest of his body much like my own was under a thick fur cloak. He was nearly bald except for the thin Mohawk of black hair atop his head that came down the back of his head into a thin braid. Kito stopped at a locked door made of some thick metal that he unlocked and walked through, looking back at me with serious dark brown eyes as he did so.

I took a deep breath as I tried to fight the panic deep inside. I nodded and crossed the threshold and as I did the pungent smell of waste, blood and sweat assaulted my sensitive nose. I tried not to breathe too deeply as we passed many dark and empty cells that lined the far wall. We walked until we came to the very back corner and there I was halted by Kito's large and scarred hand.

I watched as he lifted the torch to light the one against the wall which lit the back corner. As the light grew brighter I could see that Kiba sat against the cave wall, his wrists raw and bloody, held against the wall in shackles made of an odd metal that almost glowed around his wrists. His auburn locks had been shorn and his body was lightly covered in fur rags. He was dirty, bruised and battered and yet as he raised his head to look up at Kito I could still see those fierce and proud fiery eyes. He growled at Kito, soft and broken and then his nostrils flared and I watched as his head turned and those fiery eyes found my own.

“If it isn't my whore,” he said more in awe than anger or disgust.

Kito growled and was about to enter the cell but I placed my smaller hand on his and when his brown eyes looked at me I shook my head “no”.

“You have come far my pet. You went from lowly whore to Alpha's mate.”

I closed my eyes and shrugged, “I was happy being who I was before you came along. I was blessed to be able to be with Kouga and Ayame, two amazing souls that healed mine.”

“Isn't that so…sweet? It's sickening to hear the love in your voice. Ayame was always the sweet one, so innocent, naïve and filled with hope.”

His face was twisted in hatred and it was almost frightening to see it but underneath you could see the sorrow.

“She was and if we are lucky her daughter will be blessed with the same traits.”

“Did you know that Ayame was thought to be an Omega? Oh she was so…special. Even I loved her,” and as he said it I could see so many emotions flitter across his dirty face; sorrow and regret two of them.

“They say you destroy the things you love.”

The words left his mouth almost as if he was reciting a love poem and I shivered at the oddness of it all.

“Did you?”

“Did I what,” I asked generally confused.

“Did you kill the things you love,” he asked as he looked me over before staring into my eyes with a deep intensity.

I stared at him unsure of an answer.

“You lost the cub you carried,” he stated more than asked in a serious tone.

I nodded finding I didn't want to say the words out loud with the pain still too raw.

“Did you also lose the cub I put into your belly?”

Part of me felt I should say nothing and yet before I could answer I watched as Kito turned to look behind me with angry eyes, his large arms crossed in front of his chest. I turned to follow his gaze and there stood my quiet Yuki, half hidden in the shadows of the doorway hand in hand with Ran.

I sighed and held my hand out beckoning him to my side. He glanced at me and fidgeted before he slowly made his way to my side taking my hand and then bringing himself as close to my body as possible, as if he could hide himself against the dark furs. I knew it was impossible with his pale hair and complexion but I could understand his nervousness. At his side was Ran who growled and eyed Kiba with animosity that looked wrong on his usually pleasant face.

“I am assuming my answer lies with the white haired one,” and as he said it he seemed to stare at Yuki, looking him up and down from head to toe.

“I suppose it is a blessing that he favors you. I was always told my hair and eyes were ill omens.”

I had nothing left to say and I felt more conflicted than before I had come to see him.

“I am done. Thank you Kito.”

I turned Ran and turned my own body which Yuki clung to and we began walking towards the doorway.

Kiba's voice rang out once more in the nearly silent room “I hope he lives a good life.”

I gently placed my hand on Yuki's head and he looked up at me. I didn't answer as I left the room with my boys and we made our way to the steps and up them.

When we reached the top I took a deep breath and looked up at the pale blue sky before looking down at Ran and then Yuki.

“You two know that you're punished as of now don't you?”

I heard Ran sigh and watched as he nodded his head and saw and felt Yuki nod against my leg.

“Let's go back to the den. Your sister is probably as hungry as I am.”

As we walked Ran came to my other side and took my hand in his so that I had my left arm wrapped around Yuki at my side and Ran's hand in my right.

“Was that man Yuki's Dad,” asked Ran softly.

“He is Yuki's sire,” I answered as we came to the cave entrance.

“What is the difference in a sire and a Dad,” asked Ran with the cutest confused pout.

We walked through the cave headed towards our den as I answered, “Kouga is a Dad, that man is a sire. A sire is someone who helps to make a cub or pup but a Dad or a father is someone who is there to help care for and raise it.”

I saw understanding dawn on their faces and as we entered our Den both boys gleefully ran to Kouga who sat at the hearth with Kira, Sachi and Himawari. I watched as Kouga playfully played with both boys and saw the happiness on Yuki's face as looked up at Kouga.

Yuki was young and still had many things to learn but already he seemed to know that Kouga was more important than the person he had seen in the cell.

To Be Continued….

Sorry everyone. I was sick the past few days. Too weak to even sit up let alone write. Going to try to get back on schedule. Soon this story will be over and then I'm going to try to finish “Do what you have to do”.