InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Enlightenment ❯ Chapter 14 ( Chapter 14 )

Chapter 14

 

Inuyasha glanced lazily at his clock sitting on the nightstand that read 2 am in the morning. He had gone to bed an hour after he was sure that Tai was sleeping peacefully but he just couldn't get to sleep. Today had really done a number on everyone. He never thought about what he would do if Tai found out about his little secret, which he did. Miroku had left a message on his answering machine while they were out saying that Hana confessed about her eavesdropping on Sango and Kagome's many conversations over the phone and told Tai all that she knew. Of all the ways that Tai could've found out… he had to hear it from the pervert's daughter who didn't know the burden or consequences of such a secret.

 

 

Secondly, he never thought of how it would affect Tai emotionally. He had been surprised today by Tai's emotional state. Everyone had always said that Tai was mature for his age and a very smart child aware of everything around him. Tai was so distraught over their whole divorce, he just never saw how much deeper it went. Tai even went so far as to compare the two of them together and his looks as the sole reminder of why his mother was hurting. At some point after Kagome had left, he had figured out that Tai and Kagome may have had a little run in with Kikyou. That would explain why Kagome had been in such a rush to get home this afternoon.

 

 

Inuyasha heard light footsteps coming down from the hall and it wasn't long before his door that he left ajar slowly creaked open. A silver head peered in with bright golden eyes and a little fist reaching above clutching the door knob.

 

 

“Daddy?” whispered Tai walking slowly to the bed.

 

 

“Hey buddy. What are doing still up?”

 

 

“I…” he glanced back down at Teddy, “Teddy couldn't sleep and said that we should come sleep with you.”

 

 

Inuyasha rolled his eyes at his son but didn't hesitate to open the covers for him to crawl into. “All set?” he asked once Tai was under the covers. He felt Tai nod and proceeded to tuck him in. “Now go to sleep.”

 

 

“Daddy?”

 

 

“What is it now?” he asked gently.

 

 

“How come you left mommy for that other lady who made mommy cry?” Tai asked carefully with his back turned from him.

 

 

Inuyasha was taken aback by Tai's question. Damn. The kid was just too damn smart for his age and perceptive too. He opened his mouth but didn't quite know how to approach Tai's question.

 

 

“It's complicated Tai.” That was the best that he could do for now as a form of explanation. He himself didn't know either why he had chosen this path for but he was just too stubborn to admit it.

 

 

“Why?”

 

 

“Because.” Though Tai is smart for his age, sometimes he was still a normal kid who thought at the same level at everyone else at his age. He hoped that this conversation would end. He was just at a complete loss for words right now.

 

 

 

“Why did you leave mommy daddy? All the princes and princesses who got married in mommy's bedtime stories all lived happily ever after…”

 

 

 

“That's not real life Tai.” He hated to sound so pessimistic but it just came out. He hated to be the one to break it to Tai that sometimes happy ending don't exist and that they aren't for everyone. Inuyasha remembered a time when he thought that it was that simple also. Find a girl you love, get married, and live happily ever after. But of course that was ages ago. “Real life is different from fairytales.”

 

 

“I don't understand daddy. If you married mommy doesn't that mean that you love her? I know you love mommy. Did you love that other lady more?” At his question Tai clutched Teddy tighter.

 

 

Inuyasha sighed. This was going to be difficult. He didn't know how best to put it into words so that Tai would understand. How was he going to explain that he had had an affair with his high school sweetheart behind Kagome's back, despite knowing the repercussions, and neglected his young family along the way? “I… Tai… I don't know how best to tell you what happened or what I did. Maybe someday I'll be able to explain it to you better. But just not now alright?” He watched Tai nod softly and let out a sigh of relief. He reached over to his son's head and began stroking it. “No matter what happens… or how broken you think our family might be… me and your mother will always be there to love you. You got that?”

 

 

Tai slowly turned to him and hugged him. “Good night daddy.”

 

 

“Sweet dreams buddy,” Inuyasha said placing a light kiss on Tai's forehead and hugging him back.

 

 

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Inuyasha and Tai weren't the only ones who have had a rough day. Kagome tossed and turned for sometime before giving up to insomnia. She just kept replaying the day's events over and over again in her head. It had started off alright but as the day progressed it seemed that it was going downhill, not to mention out of control. To say that seeing Kikyou at the grocery store was unexpected is an understatement. Then after that she had left Tai back with Inuyasha without an explanation. She winced at that. How could she let her emotions take a hold of her like that and cause her to neglect her son? She'd have to make it up to him somehow.

 

 

Her thoughts wandered back to Kikyou once again. No matter how much her life had changed since her divorce with Inuyasha, it felt as if she was still carrying the emotional luggage she had developed since she found out about his affair with the woman. Her life now is considerably different from being a stay-at-home mom in her marriage with Inuyasha. She had counted on her job and new life-style to bring about change in her life and even perhaps enlightenment.

 

 

“Nothing just seems to work…” Kagome heaved a heavy sigh and realized that sleep was impossible tonight.

 

 

Without giving the possibility of sleep a further thought, she made her way to her kitchen and decided to fix herself some hot chocolate. Nothing like chocolate to ease a woman's raging emotions right? It was amazing how she had easily adapted to her new household. Her new home had a smaller kitchen and not quite as spacious, although she could not deny that it was certainly very cozy.

 

Everything was just slowly eating away at her. Everything that had happened, the last ten years of her life, and her family were just all coming at her at once and she just didn't know which to deal with first. She had pushed all her problems aside and hoped that they would miraculously go away or work themselves out because she was just so tired. She was so damn tired of everyone lying to her.

 

 

She didn't understand why Sango or Miroku hadn't told her about Kikyou ever since she came to them for advice about Inuyasha. She didn't understand why Inuyasha married her only to leave her for his old high school girlfriend. Nothing made sense anymore. She felt so helpless under all the pressure and emotions warring inside of her.

 

 

“I don't know what to do anymore…” she whispered to herself running her fingers through her hair.

 

 

At times like this she'd call up Sango but right now she wasn't sure that she wanted to talk to Sango. Part of her resented her best friend for keeping such a vital piece of information from her. She just wanted everything to stop. She wanted the whole world to stop for just one day so that she could assess the damage in her life and figure out a way to get it back on track.

 

 

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“WHAT?!”

 

“Please forgive me my love-” he stopped to dodge a pillow that was thrown at his head.

 

 

“Miroku how could you invite that man here?!” Another pillow was thrown at her husband's head.

 

 

“Sango! Inuyasha is our friend too even if-” a blanket flew past him to the hallway outside of their bedroom.

 

Sango finally stopped throwing random objects at her husband and sat on their bed with a heavy plop and her chest heaving from yelling. “Inuyasha stopped being our friend a long time ago. You know I'm right. He's changed…”

 

 

“Sango… Inuyasha is as much our friend as Kagome is. Inuyasha hasn't changed, he's just made some horrible choices. We all make mistakes,” Miroku said taking tentative steps toward his wife.

 

 

“Not big mistakes like cheating on your wife with your old high school sweetheart whom you haven't seen in over ten years!” she screamed, making Miroku take two tentative steps back.

 

 

“We can't control what Inuyasha does Sango. Inuyasha made a horrible decision by the way he left Kagome. If he wasn't in love with her anymore he should've settled it without dragging Kikyou in it.”

 

 

“Miroku can't you see? Kagome will never speak to us again…” whispered his wife.

 

 

Miroku sighed and walked over to his wife. He kneeled in front of her and took her hand in his. He knew what Sango was feeling. He also felt partially responsible for the way the Inuyasha and Kagome's marriage ended. “Sango don't blame yourself for what happened. I know we both had a responsibility to tell Kagome about Kikyou but we didn't and we can't change that now.”

 

 

“I just don't want to lose my best friend Miroku… I didn't think it was important to tell her about Kikyou but she came back. And then before we knew it Kagome was filing for a divorce!” cried Sango throwing her arms around her husband.

 

 

“You won't loose Kagome. She'll forgive us eventually, we just have to be patient with her,” he said stroking his wife's head.

 

 

Miroku let Sango cry on his shoulder until her sobs were barely audible. Without warning, Sango abruptly pushed away from her husband.

 

 

“What's the matter?”

 

 

“Miroku… What happened with Inuyasha and Kagome won't happen to us, right?” Sango asked cautiously.

 

 

“Sango how could you even ask me that?” asked Miroku flabbergasted.

 

Sango placed her trembling hands gently to pull her husband's face closer. “Promise me. Promise me that you won't ever cheat on me… that we won't get divorced…”

Miroku looked into the eyes of his wife. She was serious and by the looks of it, downright petrified. “Sango… I love you. Nothing and no one will ever take me away from you. I promise.”

 

 

Sango surprised him by kissing him passionately as if to make sure that he did mean it and that there would be dire consequences if he was lying. He returned her kisses and it gradually became gentler, and slower. “Sango please believe me when I say that I love you,” he whispered to his wife.

 

 

“I do believe you Miroku, with all my heart. It's just that we all thought that Inuyasha and Kagome loved each other. Look what happened to them. I don't ever want us to have to go through that. I don't think I could ever handle losing you…”

 

 

“I'd rather kill myself before I hurt you. You know that. You'll always be the only one for me Sango…” Miroku whispered.

 

 

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Kagome tapped her foot against the leg of the table beside her. She stared across from her at the man who was pouring her tea and serving her biscuits. Never in her wildest dreams did she think she'd ever see the day when Inuyasha Takahashi would invite her for a tea party.

 

 

She had gotten a phone call from him at about ten in the morning. For a minute she thought that Tai needed her again. She was completely surprised when Inuyasha had formally and calmly invited her for afternoon tea while Tai was taking a nap. So upon arriving at Inuyasha's house she kissed Tai on the forehead as he slept on the couch and proceeded into the kitchen after Inuyasha.

 

 

“So… were there any more problems last night?” she asked after taking another sip of her tea.

 

 

“Well he woke up sometime during the night, so he went to go sleep in my room. That was pretty much it,” Inuyasha shrugged.

 

Another moment of silence passed between them. This whole meeting was just awkward. Kagome had some idea why Inuyasha had invited her over to talk. It did always take him a while to bring up what he intended to talk about.

 

 

“Look-” they both said at once.

 

 

“You go first,” said Kagome.

 

 

Inuyasha took a sip of his own tea before saying what he wanted to say. The few seconds it took for him to sip his tea and swallow it was not enough for him to mentally prepare how or what he was going to say. He hoped desperately that winging this conversation wouldn't result in him putting his foot in his mouth like every other time.

“Look… about Kikyou. I know I never mentioned her before…” he chanced a glance at her and noticed that she had one brow arched at him as if to mock him. He rolled his eyes and went on. “Kikyou and I dated in high school for a while and then she moved away. I didn't hear from her since then until she became my-”

 

 

“Your lover?” Kagome asked cutting him off.

 

 

Inuyasha was quiet for a while. He hadn't planned on taking it this far even though he had some inkling that once he brought up Kikyou it was automatic that it would lead to a discussion and explanations about their failed marriage. Inuyasha unconsciously shoved a whole biscuit in his mouth as if to send out a message to Kagome that he didn't want to talk about it. Not yet.

 

 

“Well seeing as how you've stuffed a whole biscuit in your mouth I guess I'll be the only one talking,” she said a bit peeved.

 

 

Kagome took a deep breath to prepare herself and to remind herself not to lose her composure. All she wanted to do was slap the man across from her until she felt the rage leave her body. She also contemplated about dumping the remainder of her warm tea on his clean silver hair. Despite these thought running through her mind, she knew she couldn't do it because as much as she wanted to hurt him, she had to be the adult. She always had to be the adult.

 

 

“Inuyasha I can't begin to describe to you what it is I'm feeling right now. Because frankly, I have no clue what I am feeling. I feel confused, betrayed, and hurt,” she started. Inuyasha swallowed a portion of his biscuit.

 

“I feel so betrayed by Sango and Miroku for not telling me anything about Kikyou. I feel betrayed that the person I've known for ten years and who claimed to love me is no where in sight…”

 

 

Okay so maybe he deserved that. The only thing he was quite surprised about is how she had separated him from his younger self and him now. He hadn't really seen any transformations in himself. The only thing he recognized were the decisions he made and though they were decisions he may not have made in the past, the circumstances were quite different now.

 

 

“Are you listening to me?!” Kagome asked harshly as she slapped her tea cup down on the wooden table. “I don't understand how the man I have known for ten years could betray me like that. I've never questioned your sincerity towards me Inuyasha.”

 

 

She had so much to say. She just didn't know how to say them. How was she going to make him understand just how badly he had hurt her?

 

 

“Do you have any idea what it's like to wake up one day and find that everything completely different and you just didn't see it coming? Do you know what it feels like to be betrayed by the person you trusted with your whole heart? Do you have any idea how that feels?”

 

 

That wasn't even half of what she wanted to say to him but it felt damn good to voice it out for him to hear. By the time she had finished Kagome realized that she was panting and her shoulders heaving. She felt about 100 lbs. lighter.

 

 

“Inuyasha… if you weren't happy with me you should've just told me. If you wanted to leave me I wouldn't have tried to change your mind. It just hurt so much that you didn't even have enough respect for me to actually tell me to my face rather than having an affair.”

 

 

Kagome quickly picked up her tea to take a slow relaxing sip. She felt so much better. Letting everything out felt so therapeutic… Now she had to listen to Inuyasha, despite the fact that she knew she wasn't going to like anything he had to say.

 

 

Inuyasha on the other hand was stunned into silence. After watching Kagome sort through her feelings and direct them at him was unexpected. Though watching her as she relaxed in her chair and take a calming sip of tea was more unnerving. It was his turn to say something…

 

 

“Kagome… I honestly can't give you a straight explanation about why I acted the way that I did. Look, I just didn't expect Kikyou to have such a hold over me. I didn't think I'd ever see her again after she moved away. Before I knew it…” he trailed off.

 

 

He didn't want to go in too much detail. And by the looks on Kagome's face he knew that she understood why he had left it at that.

 

 

“I just… I just needed change in my life…” Inuyasha whispered.

 

 

Kagome's lip tightened into a thin line and slowly nodded her head. “Well now you have it.”

 

 

“Look Kagome… I know that was harsh but it's the best that I can give you,” sighed Inuyasha.

 

 

“Of course,” said Kagome curtly.

 

 

Kagome honestly didn't expect his answer to be so… so forward. When someone says that they need change they usually mean switching to a new shampoo or even quitting a job. Since when did it begin to mean replacing the person you're supposed to be sharing your life with? How does someone wake up one day and decide that they `needed a change'?

 

 

This man in front of her was simply impossible to decipher. The Inuyasha she had known and loved was gone…

“Daddy?”

 

 

Both adults looked up to see the little toddler rubbing his eyes, obviously having just woken up from his afternoon nap. Kagome quickly put on a warm smile on her face.

 

 

“Hi sweetie!”

 

 

“Mommy!” cried Tai barrelling himself into his mother.

 

 

Kagome hugged her son lovingly while shooting Inuyasha a look as if to say `we are not finished yet'.

 

 

“Hey buddy, why don't you go watch some television for a while. Mommy and I are just finishing something up alright?” Inuyasha said ruffling Tai's hair and leading him out of the kitchen.

 

 

Kagome listened as Inuyasha switched the television on and rubbed her temples. Now she couldn't say what she wanted with Tai being awake.

 

 

“Daddy, Teddy can't see. I think he needs glasses.”

 

 

“Really? May be we should give him an eye exam.”

 

 

“What's that daddy?”

 

 

“An eye exam will tell us what's wrong with Teddy's eyes and if he does need glasses.”

 

 

As Kagome listened to their conversation, she couldn't help but smile. Maybe the man that she knew hadn't disappeared. He just… changed. She was beginning to hate that word more and more. Nonetheless, she just couldn't deny the fact that Inuyasha had been trying his best and has become an absolutely loving father to her son. Maybe he was no longer the man who loved her, but he was still Tai's father. And that to her was the most important thing in the world to her.

 

 

“Kagome?”

 

 

Kagome blinked away the glazed look she had and stood up from her seat. She walked over to the sink to put her empty cup in. “Inuyasha I think we have come to an understanding,” she said with her back turned to him.

 

 

“We have?” asked Inuyasha completely unprepared for Kagome's calmness and collected composure. He thought for sure she was going to bite his head off once Tai was out of sight.

 

 

“I realized that the only thing that keeps us together is Tai. We have our differences, and I can honestly recognize that. I can't ask anything else from you other than to be a good father to Tai. As long as you are a good father to our son, you and I will have no problems getting along,” she said.

 

 

She turned to face Inuyasha who was looking at her with an astonished look. Kagome gave him a half smile before walking past him.

 

 

“Who knows? We might even become friends…”

 

 

Inuyasha could only look after her with a bitter smile as he crossed his arms over his chest. The whole conversation was full of surprises. In the end, he couldn't be happier with the outcome. He felt that they were making progress. Sure they had hit a few bumps along the way, but they were getting there. Things may never be the same between him and Kagome. Who knows what the future will hold for them…