InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Heaven and Earth ❯ Seperated ( Chapter 13 )

Chapter 13: Separated

 

Sama - an honorific when used at the end of a name (closest translation is Mr. or Mrs)

 

Later that evening Kagome went in search of Inuyasha. Since they had returned to the village he had been very quiet and had now disappeared. She wondered why Sesshoumaru going back to his lands seemed to bother Inuyasha so much. He always wanted a relationship with his brother even though he won't admit it. I wonder if they had a fight. They did seem to be getting along so well when Sesshoumaru was human. She found him a short time later sitting up in a large tree looking off into the sunset.

 

“Are you okay, Inuyasha?” she asked, concern showing in her voice as she looked up to him.

 

“Yeah, fine,” he answered shortly. In fact he was feeling pretty shitty. He really missed Sesshoumaru more than he thought he should and it was confusing the hell out of him.

 

Kagome wasn't sure what to do, even though he said he was fine she could tell he was lying. “You don't look fine,” she replied back, “Want to talk about it?”

 

“Keh, not really,” he frowned. How can I tell you what the problem is? I'm not even sure myself, and if I told you what had happened, you'd sit me into next week and never speak to me again.

 

“It's Sesshoumaru, isn't it?” she asked, surprising him. He began to get worried wondering how she had known and how much she knew.

 

“Why would you say that? I don't care about him,” he replied testily. He hopped down out of the tree to stand before her.

 

“It seemed like you guys were finally getting along. Did you have a fight?” she asked.

 

“What's with all the questions about Sesshoumaru, wench? Maybe you like him. You did do an awful lot of staring at him,” he ground out at her. He didn't want to discuss this anymore and began to walk away.

 

Kagome blushed and then frowned. “I did not!” she huffed, getting irritated and following after him. “I'm just trying to help; I thought it might make you feel better if you talked about it, that's all.”

 

“Yeah, well it doesn't and you're not,” he growled out at her. Why won't she just drop it, he thought to himself feeling frustrated. He started to walk faster to get away from her.

 

“Inuyasha you're such a jerk! Sit!!” Kagome commanded, as she stopped and put her hands on her hips.

 

“Oi, bitch what you do that for?” Inuyasha asked from his prone position on the ground. The charm on the prayer beads was again working full force, much to his dismay.

 

“Humph,” she answered as she walked on by him with her nose in the air. “I'm going home since I'm not needed around here.”

 

“Hey, no your not!” he yelled back at her as the spell wore off. He got to his feet just in time to be smashed down onto the ground again. “Stop doing that!!” he half yelled and half whined. When he was finally able to rise again he chased after her.

 

“Look I'm sorry okay. I don't want to make you mad,” he blushed. He hated discussing how he felt about things.

 

Kagome softened a bit. “I just don't understand why you won't tell me what's wrong.”

 

“I'm not even sure myself, Kagome. I got mad at him and said something I didn't mean.” Inuyasha was looking down at the ground as they walked along, his ears drooping.

 

“Well let's go see him and you can apologize,” she suggested logically.

 

“No, it's not that simple. Just let me figure things out okay?” he asked stopping and holding her hands in his. He looked into her brown eyes, they look like Sesshoumaru's, he thought, and before he knew what he was doing he leaned in and kissed her.

 

Kagome was shocked, she was not expecting this but it felt so nice to have his lips pressed against hers so gently. She closed her eyes and leaned into the kiss, returning it with all the love she had in her heart for him.

 

Inuyasha was surprised, he was kissing Kagome, something he had wanted for a long time, and while it felt nice, something was missing. There was no passion behind it, no fireworks, as the young teen girl would say. To him it was like kissing a good friend and nothing more. It wasn't like with Sesshoumaru.

 

They pulled apart. Kagome's face was slightly flushed and she smiled up at him. He looked down at her feeling more confused than he had before. He turned his face away and dropped her hands. “Let's get back to the village,” he intoned quietly.

 

“Okay, don't worry Inuyasha, things will work out,” she said cheerfully, taking his hand in hers, they walked back to their friends.

 

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“Sesshoumaru-sama!” yelled Rin happily. “Your back…” before she could say more she noticed the color of his eyes and she stopped from jumping onto him. “Sesshoumaru-sama, you have eyes like Rins,” she uttered with surprise, putting both her hands on his cheeks to look more closely as he bent down towards her. “They are so pretty.”

 

“Just like Rins,” returned Sesshoumaru as he picked the happily smiling child up. She threw her arms around his neck making him smile. He quickly put the smile away when he saw Jaken approaching. He was glad to see them both but he could not show these emotions in front of his retainer.

 

“Lord Sesshoumaru, Lord Sesshoumaru welcome back,” squawked Jaken bowing. When he stood upright he gawked at his master, a look of confusion on his face. “What happened to you my lord?”

 

“I was human for a short time, this is a reminder of that time,” his voice cool and level. Jaken wanted to ask more but the look on his lords face told him that was all the information he was going to get at the moment. He bowed low, not wanting to get Sesshoumaru angry at him.

 

“Everything is in order at the castle,” Jaken informed his master instead, following behind his lord as he carried Rin towards his home.

 

“Have we heard anything from the Northern Lord?” Sesshoumaru asked, remembering back to when he had first left his lands.

 

“No, my lord,” returned Jaken.

 

Sesshoumaru hoped that was a good sign. He didn't particularly want to come back to again go into battle. He had enough of that for now.

 

He spent the day catching up on all the millions of little niggly things a lord has to do, and it was fairly late into the evening when he was finally finished. He retired up to his room, passing Rin's and checking in on the sleeping child. He gave her a small peck on the cheek and then retired to his own room.

 

Finally undressed, he flopped down tiredly onto his large futon. His room was the largest in the castle and it was surprisingly light and cheerful. Rice paper adorned the walls with scenes of waterfalls and cranes on it and many oil lamps were strategically placed around the room giving it a soft glow.

 

As well as the large wooden futon, he had a small table for eating, an ornately carved wardrobe for his clothing, a high backed chair in front of a writing table and a curved lounge chair full of pillows. There was a large balcony that he could walk out onto overlooking one of Rin's favourite gardens.

 

The garden itself had large old cherry trees surrounding it and tons of different kinds of flowers and pretty shrubs. There were three koi ponds with the large fish swimming lazily under the bridges that crossed them. There was even a small rock garden with different colored sand that Rin loved to make designs in.

 

None of that mattered at the moment. Sesshoumaru laid back on his futon thinking back to what his brother had said. He really does hate me, he thought. Why did I hope for anything else? Foolish human emotions, they will be the death of me. He tried to put the hurtful words out of his mind but could not. They ran around and around in his head, stuck in a loop in his mind, and he sighed feeling intensely lonely.

 

No matter how hard this is I have to carry on, I cannot dwell on what cannot be. He reached up to his neck and gently rubbed at the marks he knew were there. Seems since he couldn't defeat me in physical combat he found another way. He tried to close his eyes and fall asleep but couldn't, so he rose from his bed spending the rest of the night looking out into the garden, his heart heavy.

 

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Days turned into weeks and the two groups continued on as before with just a few changes. Inuyasha was grumpier than normal and kept to himself more, especially avoiding Kagome. Sesshoumaru was much quieter and took more chances, fighting more often than he would have otherwise. Their friends began to worry.

 

“Inuyasha, why don't you join us?” Miroku asked as the group settled down for lunch. “Kagome has brought you ramen,” he hoped to tempt the hanyou out of the tree he had jumped into.

 

Inuyasha's ears pricked up at the mention of his favourite meal and he hopped down to sit by Miroku. Kagome passed him his food and he took it, barely looking at her, which just confused her. Ever since that day he had kissed her he seemed to be avoiding her, or at least any contact with her and somedays it made her sad, others it made her angry. He wouldn't talk to her about it no matter how many times she sat him so she had just given up.

 

Miroku looked between the two of them knowing something was wrong. I'm going to have to take Inuyasha aside and find out what is going on, he thought to himself as he ate his food.

 

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Rin was the first to notice the changes in her lord. “Master Jaken, Lord Sesshoumaru is so sad,” she told the imp.

 

“What are you talking about? Our lord does not get sad foolish girl,” he answered crabbily as the two followed after Sesshoumaru.

 

“Well he is and he's skinny too,” Rin grumbled, crossing her arms and scowling at the toad.

 

“I don't want to hear anymore of your craziness,” he raised his staff to give her a pop on the head.

 

“Jaken,” Sesshoumaru warned, stopping the toad cold. He hadn't even turned his back to see what was happening behind him.

 

Rin stuck her tongue out at him and ran to catch up to Sesshoumaru leaving Jaken with a death grip on his staff of two heads. Lord Sesshoumaru is way too lenient with that child, he grumbled to himself.

 

The small group stopped a few hours later to rest. Sesshoumaru wandered off and sat under a tree by himself. Rin soon joined him with a huge bouquet of flowers.

 

“Here Sesshoumaru-sama, I brought you some flowers to make you feel better,” she said, handing them to him with a huge grin on her face.

 

He smiled indulgently, taking her gift. “Thank you Rin, they do make me feel better.”

 

She grinned even larger and climbed into his lap; a thoughtful look came onto her face. “Don't you want to eat anything Sesshoumaru-sama?” She felt how thin he had become as she wrapped her arms around his waist.

 

“No, I do not feel hungry,” he answered, looking out again over the forest.

 

She frowned but didn't know what to say or do to get him to eat. Instead she asked “Why are you so sad?”

 

At first he was going to say nothing but then sighed and said “My heart hurts, Rin.”

 

“Can Rin help?” the little girl asked, feeling sad herself now.

 

Sesshoumaru noticed her unhappiness, and wanting to make her feel better he told her, “You already do Rin just by being here.” He smiled at her trying to make an effort to chase away the depression that was threatening to drown him and hugged her closer. She responded by snuggling into him more, and smiled, feeling better. She was still worried about her lord and put her mind to thinking how she could help him.

 

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Miroku grabbed Inuyasha and began to drag him off the hot springs that the group had set up camp beside. “Come on, you stink,” he told the hanyou cheerfully. “Now don't you girls follow us,” he joked.

 

“You don't have to worry about that,” Sango replied scathingly back to him.

 

After a few minutes of silence, as both boys sat in the springs, Miroku turned to Inuyasha and asked. “Have you chosen Kikyo? Is that why you don't want to be with Kagome any longer?”

 

Inuyasha's eyes got huge “What? What are you talking about?”

 

“I can see you don't seem to be interested in Kagome anymore, I was just wondering why?” Miroku asked keeping his tone neutral, looking straight ahead.

 

“Why would you think that, I'm interested,” Inuyasha answered, sinking further down into the water and glowering.

 

“No, your not, and you should be honest with Kagome. I believe she loves you. You should not lead her on,” he admonished, looking at his friend.

 

Inuyasha's ears drooped, he knew Miroku was right.

 

“So, is it Kikyo?” asked Miroku again.

 

“No” Great, I hadn't even thought of her, thanks a lot Miroku, Inuyasha thought a bit sourly. He began to growl slightly, showing his teeth, wanting this conversation to end.

 

Miroku said nothing, just watched his friend and pondered. Well if it's not Kikyo… He then noticed Inuyasha's fangs and something clicked loudly in Miroku's mind. Four fangs… four marks on Sesshoumaru's neck…

 

He remembered the time that Sesshoumaru went off to find Inuyasha when he had tried to molest Kagome and how Inuyasha had come back with his brother calmer and seemingly satisfied. The way Sesshoumaru limped that day…

 

He thought back to the time he had seen the two brothers with nothing on but towels enter Sesshoumaru's room at Joshin's castle, the way the lock had clicked after the door had closed behind them.

 

I always wondered why Inuyasha was so protective of Sesshoumaru, maybe it was more than just brotherly feelings…He seemed so jealous of Kagome looking at his brother, I thought he didn't want her to pay attention to Sesshoumaru over him but maybe...

 

The more Miroku thought of things, the way the two of them had looked at each other when they didn't think anyone else saw, how close they stood together and a thousand other little things, the more Miroku's eyes opened as everything just settled into place.

 

“It's Sesshoumaru,” he finally stated, just a bit loudly, in his wonder and surprise. He knew he was right when he saw the huge blush rise up on Inuyasha's cheeks, even going so far as to make the inside of his ears turn red. He sat looking at his hanyou friend with his jaws hanging open.

 

Inuyasha got up to leave the springs angrily, “So, what if it is? Does that make me some kind of pervert? Sesshoumaru said you human's wouldn't understand us.”

 

“No, wait. Inuyasha, I'm not passing judgement on you, it…it's just a lot to take in.” Miroku grabbed Inuyasha's arm and pulled him back down into the springs. “How…Why?” he didn't know what to ask first but he sure wanted to know.

 

Inuyasha was going to tell him to go fuck himself, but the burden of having no one to talk to about this was weighing heavily on him. He sat down beside the monk. “It just started out with my youkai wanting to become the alpha, to dominate him, but then it sort of changed.” He scowled, frustrated that he couldn't explain this right. “I miss him,” he said quietly.

 

“Do you love him?” Miroku asked.

 

“I don't know,” Inuyasha replied miserably. “I wanted Kagome to be my mate but when I kissed her…”

 

“You kissed Kagome?”

 

“Yeah, but it didn't feel right, I can't explain it,” he sighed out.

 

“You marked him right? Doesn't that mean he's your mate?”

 

Inuyasha blushed again and lowered his eyes. “I did that against his will, he didn't want to be marked,” he told Miroku quietly.

 

“Inuyasha, why?” asked Miroku, shocked that his friend would take advantage of someone like that.

 

“I thought it was because of my demon side, but now I don't know. Maybe I wanted him to be my mate. Damn it!! I just don't know.”

 

“So what happens to Sesshoumaru? Can he take another mate?”

 

“No, he'll always be bonded to me.” Inuyasha felt like shit as it hit home just what he had done to his brother.

 

“Inuyasha you have to fix this,” stated Miroku firmly. “You can't leave him like that if he doesn't want to be your mate.” Another thought just went through Miroku's mind, something he had heard Sango talk about, “Hey if you guys aren't together, won't that make him sick or something?”

 

“I don't think so, demons only get sick like that if they love each other and one dies or leaves. I'm pretty sure Sesshoumaru doesn't love me.” After he said the words he felt even worse, like something had squeezed his heart.

 

“We should go see that sorceress you told me about, Mahoutsukai; maybe she can give you something to break the effects of the mating mark,” Miroku thought out loud. “We shouldn't tell the girls about this, I'm not sure they would understand.”

 

“You're being awfully understanding,” Inuyasha mentioned with some suspicion.

 

“I'm your friend,” Miroku smiled, “But I'm also Kagome's. You will have to tell her if you are not interested in her anymore, but I'll give you some time to work that out.” He patted Inuyasha on the shoulder.

 

“You won't tell her?”

 

“No, but as soon as you know Inuyasha, you have to, agreed?”

 

“Agreed,” stated Inuyasha, nodding his head.

 

He felt better now that he had been able to talk about this with someone and was glad Miroku didn't think he was some kind of freak or something.

 

They decided they would go to the sorceress the next time Kagome went home, which they knew would be soon. They were sure they could think of some pretence to keep Sango at the village while they went. The thought of seeing his brother again made Inuyasha pretty nervous. He'll probably try to kill me for what I've done. I hope he'll let me make it right and that he'll forgive me. Something within Inuyasha cried at the thought of his brother hating him again.

 

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Rin awoke hearing her lord moaning in his sleep. Jaken was still snoring off to the side, nothing will wake him up when he snores like that, the little girl thought as she walked by him and over to Sesshoumaru.

 

She was instantly worried as she noticed the sweat that was coating him. He was shivering and when she tried to shake him he wouldn't wake up.

 

Even though Sesshoumaru was now back to his demon form he had pushed it too far. He had gone without food or real sleep for too long and his demon body was rebelling at how hard he pushed himself without putting energy back into it. The effort he constantly put into trying to control his wayward emotions had mentally weakened him. The fact that he loved Inuyasha and wanted to be his mate, but kept himself away from his brother all combined together to make him sick for the first time in his life.

 

Rin was frantic, and she ran over to Jaken kicking the toad until he woke. “Rin stop that!” he yelled “What's wrong with you?”

 

“Lord Sesshoumaru's sick,” she wailed, tears running down her little cheeks.

 

“What do you mean he's sick, Lord Sesshoumaru would never be sick” he grumped angrily, but he still rose and allowed her to drag him over to his lord. He began to worry himself when he realized that Sesshoumaru wasn't getting up to yell at him to stop Rin from crying.

 

He sat before his prone master and tried as Rin had done to shake him awake. Jaken hit the panic button when he realized that his master was indeed ill and very ill at that.

 

“What do we do Master Jaken?” Rin was crying very loudly now.

 

“Stop that caterwauling right now! Let me think.” Jaken had absolutely no idea of what to do. He couldn't carry his master, he was too heavy and he didn't know what was causing him to be so sick. He got up and dragged over his own blanket and wrapped it as best he could around Sesshoumaru hoping to keep him warm.

 

“We need to get help,” he said to the now quietly sobbing Rin.

 

She brought her tear stained face up to his, “Kagome can help us, she's a miko, she knows about sickness. She could make him better.” She began to rise and run over to Ah-Un.

 

“I don't know about that Rin,” he returned. He didn't think Sesshoumaru would want the human girls help and that would also mean that Inuyasha would be here too.

 

She ignored his misgivings and jumped up onto the two headed dragon, “I'll be right back, keep an eye on Lord Sesshoumaru,” she yelled as she commanded Ah-Un to find Kagome and her group.

 

“Rin come back right now!!” the toad screeched. He soon sat down by his master realizing it was useless to yell to her any longer and started a fire as he saw that Sesshoumaru was still shivering. Hurry Rin, he thought to himself, hoping he wasn't going to regret this later on.