InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ If You Are Not The One ❯ You're the Closest to Heaven ( Chapter 18 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

IF YOU ARE NOT THE ONE

Chapter Nineteen: You're the Closest to Heaven That I'll Ever Be

It all stared with a simple phone call.

Kagome had been in the Shower at the time her cell phone, which resided next to her bed on a wooden drawer, rang about five times before it suddenly stopped. Two minutes later it rang again, and until she got sick of it chiming numerous times, she walked out of the bathroom a towel tied around her chest. And as she was about to answer, something deep inside stopped her from committing the greatest mistake in her life. Her hand inches away from her phone before she rapidly took it back. A single droplet ran across her cheeks, her hair socking wet on the back of her shoulders. Never before stopping to look at any number on her caller ID, indigo eyes suddenly guided themselves to gaze at the number as it continued to ring loudly nonstop.

There was no denying it, she knew that number by heart, not having seen it in over a month or so, it looked so familiar yet so distant. Her guess had been that he might have forgotten, no matter how much that hurt too, it was for the better until now. And almost expected, her heart skipped a beat or two. For a minute she felt her whole world stop and that very second it all came crashing down all at once. Her eyes widen and the realization hit her like a brick on a wall. She stood there by her bed, her phone not having seized its crying. Knees would not stoop shaking as her eyes widen, her hand reached for the device once more but suddenly coming to a halt before it could.

She couldn't do it, hard for her to breath; she sat at the edge of her bed as she eyed it with a fervor and want. But at the same time all her senses forbid her from doing so. An image of perfect beauty she could not forget, and from which she would never recover hunt her mind. Lost in everything that could have been, her head pounded and raced thoughtlessly in search for the very memory she fought so hard to forget.

There was no point in calling, not any more. She didn't need anymore excuses, for they existed before he did, there just was no point on insisting. And immediately pain shot through her interior, something she had not felt for quiet sometime, as if she was waking up into a real nightmare. Her heart bleeding from so much love and hate, her anger felt heavier than that of cement. She had completely gone over board, not knowing the right way to escape, the right exit to all her dilemmas. Searching for something she no longer possessed, she eyed the room desperately for distraction.

And as her phone continued it's ringing, her eyes remain spellbound in a trance, not hearing anything around her except her heart beating slowly and heavily in her chest. And every beat it took, it distanced her from reality. She needed not but one reason and it was hard for her to think the fact that she still loved him was far from one. And it was difficult to believe she needed more excuses to pick up that phone and tell him he was her whole world and religion, and that her life had lost its meaning the day she walked out on him. It was arduous without having him awaken her from this nightmare she felt so disoriented in. So much emptiness that needed fulfilling, where to begin, how to undo what was now gone?

Her eyes were cold; she swore not to cry and to neglect it all. No, she wouldn't and she couldn't anymore, her eyes were dry, not a tear insight. But there was no need for her to fake it, he knew every line on the palm of her hand and there was no denying it. It was over and this time, she did not need lies, for what exactly should she continue storing them? They were of no value to her. She was beginning to loose faith, still being able to feel his soft caresses and his strong grip around her waist as her body trembled at the very thought of him. Urging to erase him from her memory and fighting the thought of being able to hear his voice would not bring them back together again.

And all she wanted was to tell him face to face that she did not need him, that his kisses at night were not required to be able to sleep soundlessly. But she couldn't say his presence was not ineffective, it would be like denying her very being. Wrapping her arms around herself, she could hear the ringing and couldn't take it anymore. She persistently looked around frantically, searching for something to help her disentangle her problems, rummaging around for the right answers.

Wrapping herself on her comforter, she sat there waiting for her phone to continue ringing, and when it did, a glimmer of hope to listen to his soothing voice ran throughout her being. But when she could feel anticipation starting to build up, he left a message which sounded loudly in her eardrums as if he was whispering those very words in them that very second, slowly tearing her heart in two.

Forgive me for calling so late

In the middle of the night when I should be

Sleeping and not thinking about

Having my baby in my arms,

Where you are, and who are you with?

I just needed to hear your voice

At least for a second…

I'm sorry if I'm violating your peace

I-I have something to say

Look Kagome, I'm dying...dying to see you.

You have no idea how much I miss you

Baby, bring back my urge to live again

Without you I feel so empty, it hurts like hell

Just thinking you could be with someone that isn't me

Believe me is torture enough

Why won't you answer, I know you're afraid

I couldn't sleep last night, thinking of you

I know Kagome that you're thinking of me too

How many times do you want me to beg for your forgiveness?

I just hoped to hear your voice

I know you're wondering how I got this number

I just wish I could make things right

Would it help if I said I tried to forget you?

It didn't work; I couldn't put it all behind me

Everything reminds me of you

I was listening to our song the other day

Baby It's not easy getting over you, I can't and won't

I really wanted to call you and tell you I don't need you

That I'm not miserable, and pretend that I'll be fine without you

But we both know I can't cover the sun with one finger either

Babe, I-I…Kagome…

I'm sorry I called…

Hypnotized, almost following orders from her brain to see him again without her really knowing what the hell she was doing, she instantaneously threw the covers from herself. Running to her closet, she grabbed a hold of her suitcase and it ended up falling on the floor as she had pulled it down from a shelf. Every personal bellowing fell to the rug as it automatically unbolted. Pictures and worthless attempts to write letters were scattered throughout the floor. Mostly papers crumbled into a ball. She kneeled and hurried in search for photographs of herself and him, and everyone one she found would end up torn in pieces as she ripped as many as her hands could possibly get a hold on in tiny millions of pieces.

Now she had officially lost it.

There was so much left to say that there could have been said, but he stated clearly the way she felt and it hurt her even more. And he reminded her of everything bad and everything good he had ever taught her. From the meaning of a rose to interpreting words from anonymous stares. He taught her more than a hundred was to kiss, and how to love someone without holding back any part of her. But he had forgotten one last instruction; she didn't know how to live without him. And for doing this, she felt a passionate hatred towards him that remained overshadowed by sheer perplexity.

Breaking her vow, tears spilled one by one over her chin. And as she continued on rupturing and shredding the pictures that lay scattered on her floor, she was spellbound and could not seize from ripping anything on her path. Not only photographs of them but family-correspondence letters she never got a chance to send and other photographs dear to her, including ones from her family. And when she came across the photograph of her parents torn in a half, she took an immediate hold to its two pieces very close to her heart as she embraced it and fell sideways on the solid ground, tears running down her face as she cried hysterically and oh so quietly.

Not being able to let it all out even thought she knew perfectly well it was well into the night and no one was in the bedroom across the hall or anywhere in the apartment. Remembering Sango had gone out with Hinten and she was not to be home until midnight, Kagome didn't think it was okay to cry her eyes out here. Still feeling as if she had something to hide, something she couldn't let out here of all places, no not here.

Her eyes were shut but that did not discontinue the shuffles and impede the tears from shedding. She just clutched her favorite photograph of her folks as tight as she possibly could yet not enough to tear it apart or crumble it up. Weeping unrestrained, she yelped in silence wanting to rip her wrecked heart out for dishonoring it so badly. A self punishment felt deserved for loosing control and destroying the only picture she had ever conserved so much over the years, and had practically begged her mother in letting her keep when she was kid. And as she persistently held on to it for dear life, she couldn't bring her eyes to look at it, she couldn't bare to see something so small yet so significant, ruined because of another one of her childish and nervous breakdowns.

When she had somewhat calmed herself down, Kagome sat up now and looked around herself to find every photograph and papers she owned torn in pieces. Standing up and setting the photograph she grasped on to, carefully on the nightstand by the lamp next to her bed, her hands trembled slightly with anger. Going in the closet once more, she opened some drawers in search of clothing to put on, still holding on to the knot of her towel that had come undone. And the minute she had changed, she grabbed her purse, car keys and she was out the front door to her apartment in a matter of seconds.

She was sick of it all; sick of how things never worked the way they were supposed to. And for all this and so much more she couldn't describe, she turned on the engine and drove to the nearest bar she could possibly find trying her best to hold back the tears and gulp down the lump in her throat. She didn't want to runaway, but she was confused and could not put up with this anymore. She couldn't completely block him off and move on; she couldn't take another step without having him make his presence known, he would always be there and she would always love him. But she couldn't surrender, she knew deep down she was stronger than this and she refused to go down with it all; first off she needed some kind of salvation or reassurance bottled in a beer no matter how hopeless she felt the more she drank.

That night she lost the half of her soul and a fifth of her wallet on tip in a hang-out for off-duty firemen, raging alcoholics and untalented comedians. It wasn't that alcohol was the best remedy to cure freshly opened wounds but it sure as hell helped to forget when you can't properly read the exit sign. She tried to remind herself that everything was fine, soothing herself with contemplating thoughts that seemed to get her nowhere. Not even she could believe a white little lie and at this measure a last intent was not worth a dime. After many tequila shots, the clouds fogging up her being were gone but the light was far from announcing its arrival. For as much as she tried, his name resounded in her head but could not escape her lips, nor could she accept that he wasn't here to help her get by this time, no one was.

Kagome motioned for the bartender to fill her up another round that would surely take her down memory lane; the reminiscence still a harmonic change composing a song in her interior. Everything distorted, from the day he introduced himself, and to the way he would tease her around making her feel beautiful with a mere smile. It was so hard to resist falling in love; she had never imagined she would hand him her whole heart with a single gaze. He had a way with words constantly making her smile.

Nonetheless she felt it all sink in as she gulped her fifth one yet letting the alcoholic beverage take its effect on her. Should she have given him another chance? She did not know if he deserved it or if she was capable of loving him without knowing it could happen again. She couldn't take that risk.

However, she understood he was only human, but she could not bear to think about sharing him with another being. Forgiveness…In a way she could never approach such a road, for he would soon enough be a father to a child that was not hers. Oceans of jealousy trapped in her skull helped to conclude he was a hypocrite, his two sided face would perhaps never change. It was more than a bumpy road, some would never comprehend.

Their six years together had practically been thrown out the window from the moment he decided she wasn't enough woman to fulfill his needs or at least whatever was going through his head at the time. Maybe she would have never been the kind of wife he deserved. But not wanting to blame it all on him, instead she had tried repeatedly to put herself in his shoes, realizing this conceivably proved she wasn't one for commitment. And the worst part was that she could never be at least his friend because she would not be content and end up wanting something more.

Soon after the tears had disappeared, one bartender there was a fabulous woman named Ayumi, a woman who had ended up being in a band with one other girl that had failed in showing up tonight for their late night show, convincing Kagome to accompany her.

“My friend Jackie and I had a regular gig singing at local bars. Because this one was once a strip-club, in long-ago days, there is a stage behind the bar.” Ayumi had said which is where Kagome stood to sing seconds later with her new bartender friend as the guitarist in the background. You could say it was like Cherokee only slightly different since there was no electronic device there to help Kagome with the lyrics. She wasn't too bad; men started to clap, whistle and howl, asking for an encore which Kagome did not have to be asked twice to provide with.

“This is one of my favorite songs, it reminds me of someone back home and I would love to share it with you.” The guitarist stared strumming what was a soft rhythm. The melody sweet to ones ears.

Someone in the far off distance, listened carefully, his equally rare eyes fixed on the attractive singer whose eyes where far from this world, engaged on no one there but simply trapped between this realm and the next. Her head started bobbing and she closed her eyes to savor the moment allowing it to sweep her off her feat. But wherever she was, or thought she was, he smiled with just watching the girl pour her soul or what was left of it on a depressing song as she sat on a stool holding on to the microphone as her only reinforcement. He had heard her before, her voice an illusion of who she truly was in reality or perhaps pretended of being. There was something more to her, something he had never seen before, her voice a marvelous instrument that helped to hide her flaws.

And I'd give up forever to touch you
Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now

He understood it was more than a song...It was her heart she was practically handing out there in a silver platter. Something she had never done before, never having encountered the opportunity. Therefore it was easy to see she was enjoying the moment, almost as if this was something she had always done before, sounding as professional as she failed to physically appear. Not that there was anything wrong with her tank top and shirt, the wind-chill factor currently being forty below outside.

And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight

And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

Taking a sip of his beer which now seemed as bitter as his life was, he listened to the singer who continued to sing but this time her eyes all watery and a single tear dripping down her fair skin, her face holding a somewhat more serious appearance. He wanted so badly to know what was going through her mind, to know what was bothering her so. Making her sound so helpless and fragile, he knew her differently, he knew her as someone today he did not recognize, a mirage if you will.

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything seems like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know your alive

And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am

The split second she finished the last verse, her eyes slowly opened and she got up bowing as everyone in the audience around him clapped and whistled at her performance. She looked hesitant for a minute before she walked away from the little excuse for a stage fallowed by the guitarist, looking towards the microphone longingly.

Kagome sat back on her stool where on the counter of the bar; an empty tiny glass resided still, waiting for her return. And when the state of ecstasy seemed less than a shot away from her, a handsome middle-age man twice Kagome's age, found a stool next to hers and took interest in her or her situation the minute he laid eyes on her.

This made bright eyes livid and made his blood rapidly circulate throughout his veins as he watched from afar, bringing his beer to his lips before taking one last gulp. Soon after constantly eying, he noticed the two had engaged in a conversation she enjoyed taking part in, being it mostly her speaking and the man was all ears occasionally agreeing with her. It was minutes then that he got sick of the way he witnessed her laughing with the stranger and the way the scum bag tried to place his hand over her leg. That was when he could not take it anymore and walked over to them ignored by everyone around him.

He reached for Kagome's shoulder and spun her round unexpectedly. “Inu-Inuyasha, is that you?” She said as an undeniable strong and familiar fragrance surrounded her nostrils for a brief second, making her jump on her seat.

“No it's Jesus, of course it me Sakura! Get your stuff and let's go I'm taking you home.” He said hoping for her to get going and the guy next to her to stop staring at him as if he were a disturbance.

“But—”

“I don't want to hear it, get up.” Inuyasha stared down at her, taking the coke with rum from her hands and putting it down on the counter before grabbing her by the wrist not too harshly so that he could make her stand up on her own two feet. Pulling her up with him, he shook his head at her since she wasn't willing of departing just yet; this was definitely not the secretary he knew.

As he watched this—like Inuyasha would say—something crawled up man's ass that resided next to Kagome and stood up at her defense, clearly looking for trouble he wasn't expecting. “And what if she doesn't want to leave yet buddy?”

“Fuck off asshole this doesn't involve you.” Inuyasha glared at him.

“Like hell it does! If the lady wants to stay, she stays.” He mouth out and glared at Inuyasha back wanting to be the hero.

Inuyasha frowned and angrily bickered down on the man who was a foot shorter than he was, completely over his head with theatrical bravery. “Do us both a favorsir and back off before I make you back off.”

“I'd like to see you try kid.” He said getting smart, thinking Inuyasha wouldn't do it.

“Bullshit! I said back off old man; don't make me do it for you.” Inuyasha barked back rudely, sick of all the commotion he wasn't looking for.

After just witnessing these two quarreling at each other over the last few seconds all because of her, Kagome finally sensed the tension and laughed nervously as everyone at the bar was gradually starting to eye curiously what was going on between them. “Ohhh-kay, I want to go home now. Let's go Inu-poo.” Kagome grabbed her purse before standing up and grabbing a hold of Inuyasha's hand, pulling him away with her as they started to walk away.

They were perhaps two feet before the front exit when they heard someone talk back and they both turned around simultaneously. “Wait a second there dirt bag.”

And before they knew it, the same man had come up behind them and pulled Inuyasha back before punching him on his left cheek, he had aimed for Inuyasha's eye but instead attacked elsewhere on his face making everyone gasp and stand up at the scene. Inuyasha who was shocked but nonetheless furious, spit a tiny bit of blood, and slowly walked towards the same guy who had now backed away and looked horrified at Inuyasha's face, probably thinking that was not the smartest thing to have done and blaming the alcohol for his every misfortune.

For a guy who was not too tall or too large, Inuyasha sure as hell managed to scare the bejesus out of everyone there as he caught up with the guy who was responsible for the bruise on his face, grabbing his neck and pushing up against the nearest wall, spitting and screaming in his face as he lifted his body with one hand, “YOU. DON'T. TOUCH. ME. You do not lay a fucking finger on me. I don't know if you have a death wish or what the fuck is wrong with you, but I told you before to back off, and now you're a fucking dead man!”

Kagome screamed and ran over to where Inuyasha had carried him off, trying to pull him off the defenseless man. Inuyasha was obviously going ballistic and instantaneously some other men who had witnessed the whole thing went over to Inuyasha, and tried to help Kagome pull him back from the poor guy whom Inuyasha was currently in the process of strangling.

“Inuyasha let go, you're choking him.” Kagome yelled and punched her fist on his back repeatedly the best she could while others around them where grabbing Inuyasha by his torso and pulling him back thought they weren't very successful.

“Inuyasha!” Kagome screamed his name again and Inuyasha's eyes soften and realized this guy was clearly drunker than he was and could stand no chance against him, right then he let go of the man's bruised up neck as he fell on the floor trying his best to gulp in air and through his lungs, still holding on to his neck as others ran over to his aid.

“Bastard.” Inuyasha said lastly and pushed everyone who was holding him back off before exiting the bar, still somewhat angry with the fact that the guy had tried to attack him and was partly successful for he had actually managed to bang up his face. Kagome, of course, ran after him and saw him standing by his car which was parked next to hers, leaning over with his hand caressing his cheek.

Kagome angrily marched towards him, the windy night sending goose bumps over her sensitive flesh. She wrapped her arms over herself, feeling somewhat stupid for forgetting her jacket inside and refusing to go back inside to get it. “That wasn't necessary you know!”

“Shut the hell up, he started it, you saw!” She heard him say and felt scared not knowing why he had reacted the way he did.

“I don't care who started it, you could have killed him, and he could have gone to the hospital while you could have ended up in jail. What was going through your mind?” Kagome lectured him with a concern look in her eyes that he could not bring himself to look at without feeling guilty.

“This is entirely your fault, I have a meeting tomorrow and now I look like as if I got jumped or carjacked in the middle of down town Tokyo.”

“Well Mr. Takahashi don't be so dramatic, it doesn't look so bad all you really need is a little make up to make you look even prettier.” She said sarcastically.

He glared at her. “Talk for yourself wench.”

Kagome paused and stared up at him for a moment as if looking for something more rather than anger. “I-I thought I told you to not call me that.” She whispered and he stared back.

“And I thought I told you, my brother is Mr. Takahashi, and I'm just simply Inuyasha or have you forgotten?” His voice softer as he saw this obviously affected her.

“Fine just-simply-Inuyasha, do me the favor of taking me home.” She hugged herself and finally responded.

“Well fine then, get in the friggin' car before you end up catching a cold.”

“Oh wait, what about my car?”

He sighed. “I'll have someone get it and drop it off at your place tomorrow morning.” She nodded and rapidly got in another one of his many collective sports cars, sneezing as she closed the automobile's door shut.

After a while of agonizing silence and the sound of gears shifting, the transmission allowed the gear ratio between the engine and the drive wheels to change as the car would speed up or slowed down. Kagome just eyed him from the corner of her eyes at first but now she fully looked over at Inuyasha who had, as she expected, a pissed off face and tiredness combined all together. She started at his cheek and frowned knowing well it was her fault for not getting her drunken ass out of the bar as soon as he had instructed her to.

“I'm sorry.” She whispered so softly that it barely reached his ears. He continued to look so motionless as she said this and she couldn't tear her eyes from his perfectly handsome face that was now no different but had been slightly violated by a bruise the size of an egg.

No matter how much he tried to resist her, he couldn't, her apology haven now melted completely his anger. “It doesn't really matter anymore Sakura,” he managed to let out while sighing; his eyes still remained glued to the pavement road as he headed for her apartment.

When he turned off the engine, and had parked right in front of her building, he finally turned his head at the passenger seat and saw that his secretary had passed out his car seat. Never having witnessed such a serene face before which never failed in reminding him of his deceased wife, he couldn't tear his eyes away from the calm and serene image.

In a way he was scared of Kagome, not sure sometimes how to behave around her. In a minute she was cold and then in a matter of seconds so warm to the touch, confusing the hell out of him. In a way she appeared to him like the reincarnation of his wife, all he would do was to compare how they were nothing alike, doubts filling his head. He couldn't deny he was attracted to her spontaneous and fiery personality.

Tonight was perhaps the ironic outcome of their many debating conversations where they fought over who got carried away with their addiction, her having no control over her cigarettes and he with his addiction to alcoholic beverages. But then again, they each had a weak spot and a resemblance. Today she had been a totally different woman from the one he was accustomed of seeing every morning at work. His curiosity had spiked intensely today and he really still held that want of knowing why she had sang the way she did and behaved the way she did. “Inuyasha, I'm sorry you saw me like that, during one of my many breakdowns…”

He remained silent just letting her talk, listening to anything she had to say in order to be able to further understand her. “Please don't tell Sango what happened today. I don't want to worry her or anyone else into thinking I need help.” Kagome said out loud as her eyes fluttered close and open again, diminished and completely worn out. She sneezed and hiccupped.

“You had a long night today.” He simply said and nodded, “Don't worry; I won't say anything I shouldn't.”

“Thanks,” She hiccupped and groaned slightly.

“You feeling alright?” He stupidly questioned even thought he knew the answer was obvious.

“Like shit, I have a headache.”

“And you'll have quite a morning tomorrow, so come on and let's get you in bed.” Inuyasha told her and got out of his car, taking off his coat jacket seeing she did not wore any while walking to the other side of his car to get her. He then opened the passenger door before placing his coat over her naked shoulders and putting Kagome's arm over his head before lifting her in his arms bridal style.

"Home?" She sleepily asked and squirmed in his arms while placing both arms around his neck.

"Yeah...home." His response muttered as hers. That word sounded so distant in his head, just the thought of belonging somewhere... or to someone. And as he walked her into the nearest elevator, he felt his heart increase its pace as she had placed her head on his heart and her feather light breathing made the palm of his hands sweaty. His heartbeats made her slumber much more peaceful in a way and her lips slowly smiled sweetly, her hold around his neck loosened a little, indicating she was profoundly in sleep or at the verge of it.

The elevator stopped and he walked right out with this obnoxious beauty yet nonetheless entertaining woman on his arms, if anyone were to have seen such a romantic view, it would surely be interpreted differently. With one hand he managed to turn the knob of her front door to the right and push it open to get in. And the minute they entered, he came in contact with two familiar faces. Sango and Hinten were on the living room couch, Hinten's hand over Sango's shoulder, with their eyes peaking curiously towards the front door, the apartment was dark and the only thing alive was the TV. Alarmed he nervously smiled. “I know what you're thinking Sango, but I did not do this to her.”

“Inuyasha what's going on and what on earth happened to your face?” She sounded pretty much worried as she stared at him holding their friend as if something bad had happened to her and he had maybe some to her rescue, the bruise as evidence.

“I got in a fight with this one dumb fuck at a bar okay and I just happened to run into her and offered to take her home myself, nothing serious, she fell asleep on our way here, I'm guessing she's had a long day that's all.” Inuyasha defensively explained to their over protective mother substitute.

“Oh my god, who the hell would do something like that to you? Let me run to the fridge and get some ice for you while you put Sakura in her room.” Shocked with the fact that someone would dare to actually attack him she completely forgot about Kagome's situation and got up from the sofa to get Inuyasha some ice. Inuyasha nodded and looked over at Hinten acknowledging his presence there too.

“Hinten.”

“Inuyasha.”

Entering Kagome's messy room, lights off and all; he walked over to the side of Kagome's bed and carefully laid her down on the disorganized covers with clothing, shoes, his jacket and the whole package. He brought the comforter over her frame and tucked her in like he was used to doing with Shippo every night. When he was done, he stared down at her sleeping face and carefully placed a strand of hair gently over her ears, away from such a beautiful facade. Kagome moaned at his touch and slowly opened her eyes to have his melted pools of gold staring back at hers.

“You don't know what it's like...to feel abandoned, betrayed and alone...” She sleepily said for some reason, something that completely caught him off guard, this struck him greatly.

She didn't expect him to say anything back to her as he stared longingly into her eyes like no one else had ever done so before and it frightened her, all she had wanted was to make him understand that what he saw today was not the outcome of one's selfish, foolish and uncontrollable behavior, but everything else. The way she had stated her explanation was somewhat ironic and actually arrogant in its meaning. Before he stood up straight to leave once and for all, he looked deeply at her face one last time and slowly turned around heading for the door. Kagome felt she had hurt his feelings remembering Sango had once mentioned how his wife was dead, feeling absolutely stupid for having bothered to say anything at all.

But before Inuyasha was able to walk out the room and close the door behind him he stood there with his back to Kagome, “You have no idea.”

And with that said he left, shutting the door and leaving her all to herself. This rather saddened her because she might have said something that instead of fixing things up made them worse and more awkward between them. Guilty for thinking she was the only one dealing with this kind of situation. She had truly forgotten that she was not the first one whose heart had been broken before. In a way, she felt she had a lot in common with him, in a weird way they were both very much alike and for this she had sympathy towards him and perhaps a little something else she couldn't place a finger on.

Before her mind could wonder off even further, she yawned and her eyes fluttered close as she still held on to his jacket taking long durable breaths, inhaling his cologne.

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN INUYASHA AND CO. I REPEAT...THEY DO NOT BELONG TO ME WHATSOEVER, ONLY TO THE VERY TALENTED MISS RUMIKO TAKAHASHI.

A/N: Long time since I've updated, I know and I apologize. Anyhow, please Read/Review and maybe I'll compensate sooner than you think…until next time.

Ja ne