InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ In the Arms of My Sanity ❯ Run pt. 1 ( Chapter 6 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: CherryBlossomMiko 
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Drama | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 07.29.2004 | Updated On: 07.29.2004 | Pages: 1 | Words: 8.0K | Visits: 516 | Status: Completed
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Drama | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 07.29.2004 | Updated On: 07.29.2004 | Pages: 1 | Words: 8.0K | Visits: 516 | Status: Completed
In the Arms of My Sanity...
-By CherryBlossomMiko
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Disclaimer: I own InuYasha. I am also a pathological liar. But if Im a pathological liar, wouldnt I lie about that too
Summary: Kagome's feudal, lust-based relationship with Sesshoumaru is pushing her emotions every which way, confusing her and driving her insane. There's only one person in the world who can make everything crystal clear; her sanity. But now Kagome's feelings for him are what's causing her controversy; can she figure it out before she loses them both?
Pairings: Sesshoumaru/Kagome (beginning), really an InuYasha/Kagome
Rating: R; for language, adult themes, and adult situations.
Author's Note: Relish in it all; this is the last chapter for a while with any warm fuzzy feelings. But its not all happy Sorry, really I am
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:: Chapter Five: Run ::
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Sesshoumaru pushed away the small twinges of helplessness that tried to invade his mind. He could stop her tears; just being there, holding her. But really, she was always so much happier after she cried, so he would just wait.
Slowly, Kagomes sighs died away, tears only falling silently by the time the sun had set. He looked down at her, her face glowing in the soft light from the scattered lampposts.
You still want to go to dinner? He asked, smiling softly.
She let out a small smile, sniffling softly, Yeah, lets go.
He stood, pulling Kagome up with him, wrapping an arm around her slim waist. Kagome seemed slightly distracted, her eyes wondering fondly to different spots of the park, her eyes seeming to try and freeze the grass and the trees, even the sky, just as they were in that moment.
He rested his palm against her breaking mark, the warmth pressing gently into his hand. The breaking had yet to have the intended positive effect, but the negative effects seemed to be few, just her tears. Not that he wanted her to cry, in fact, he detested it, but if that was the extent of the damage, he could live with that.
Kagome left his side when they reached their bedroom, disappearing into the bathroom as the sounds and scents of her shower filled the bedroom. The scent of Kagomes tears seemed permanently saturated into his shirt, the salty tinge that kept floating up to him along with the sakura that was always present in the places she was. He pulled the t-shirt over his head, tossing it off into a corner.
-
Kagome let the warm water wash down her front, only slightly relaxing the tension she felt. She sighed softly, washing quickly and ending the flow of water, stepping out into a small cloud of mist. She dried off, tossing the towel into the wash before wrapping her green silk robe around her, leaving the sash undone. Her hair, neatly pinned, was uncomfortable, and she expertly removed the clips and scrunchies, letting her hair once again fly free.
A small part of her was calling to Sesshoumaru, wanting him to come in again and run his fingers delicately through her hair. She sighed, suppressing the sudden urge to call him in, and forced herself to reach out for the brush. Before her hand was even close, long, gentle fingers were winding into her locks. She smiled softly, letting her eyes slide closed as Sesshoumaru continued to run his fingers down her back. He finally picked up the brush; though after his fingers her hair hardly needed it. She sighed contentedly, trying to forget that she was going to have to leave all this soon.
-
Sesshoumaru pulled Kagome back against his chest, her hair not at once distinguishable from the cool silk of her robe. He licked once at her mark, flicking his tongue across the pink marks of his fangs as he slid the robe from underneath his fingers, letting his hands rest flat against the smooth skin of her stomach.
I thought we were going to dinner, she whispered softly, running her hands up and down his arms.
He growled playfully, nipping at her ear before turning and walking quickly into his closet, picking a classic black suit from the hanger and changing.
-
Kagome looked around in her closet, her hand pressed against her breaking mark, fully aware that it had to show no matter what she wore.
Sessho, she called softly, turning when he entered, slipping his suit jacket over an unbuttoned shirt.
Can you cut a hole in one of these? She whispered softly, running her hand down a line of dresses.
He chuckled softly, covering her hand with his own for a moment. He flipped through them for only a moment before choosing one, placing it against her for a moment before using one of his claws to cut a round hole in the left hip.
Thanks She whispered softly, her feelings extremely mixed and confused as he left.
She slipped into the dress, arranging the hole over her breaking mark, the purple crescent still glowing. The dress was a simple white one, the skirt a few inches above her knee on the left, rippling down to a few inches under on the left. The dress was almost strapless, a thin white elastic cord wrapping around the back of her neck.
She smoothed out the dress, slipping into a comfortable pair of white dress heels. She walked back out into the room, finding Sesshoumaru lounging in his work alcove, though the computer was off and the chair was turned to face the room.
She ducked into the bathroom briefly, deciding against the make-up besides a small dap of gloss to her already dark pink lips. She clipped a bit of her hair up, leaving most of it free around her before returning to the bedroom.
Ready, she announced quietly, shaking a piece of hair from her eyes.
Sesshoumaru stood, his suit instantly falling into precise lines that were obviously tailored for his form. He walked up next to her, slipping an arm around her waist to place his palm gently against her breaking mark. She sighed softly, leaning into him. *Enjoy it while it lasts,* she reminded herself; blinking quickly to push away the tears she knew were coming.
The limo was already waiting for them out front, Ookami pulling the door open before the black vehicle even entered her view. Sesshoumaru stepped aside to let her in first, following her in and followed himself by a click as the door shut.
Sesshoumaru called forward an old favorite to the driver, leaning back into his seat as the floor vibrated in an almost undetectable way beneath them.
She sat fairly independently, remembering with a small smile the days when she would jokingly sit in his lap, leading to something not near as funny but twice as enjoyable. Things had been easier then, more fun then; they seemed two totally different lives when compared, the only constant being the presences of Sesshoumaru and InuYasha. Both of them had changed, indeed InuYasha had finally grown up when all those around him had thought he never would, a small part of her included. Most of the time, he was still the small person he'd been since he'd turned fifteen, but when the situation called for it he was almost dangerously serious, like he'd finally learned to determine the mood he should be in. Sesshoumaru had not changed much, she supposed. His instincts about her had changed, yes, but that was to be expected. After mating the instincts of a demon demanded different things, that was universal, and beyond that he hadn't really changed. He was still the more serious of the two brothers, the smartest. He still ran his business with exact precision, still able to determine people's decisions days before they made them.
All the same, with her issues extracted from the equation, everyone was the same. Sesshoumaru was still the anticipant businessman, and InuYasha was still the lethally sexy playboy. But that was where nearly all the family money lay, built upon generations of manipulating and entrancing men, the women almost hauntingly beautiful and nearly as efficient. Truly, she didn't fit into this world. The Masaharu family had often been pinned as the only perfectly legal mafia, though many thought it impossible for the Masaharu's to be so many steps ahead without doing something illegal. Every last Masaharu and their mates had been uncommonly successful, swelling nothing to billions before they had even been noticed. InuYasha had been the first to step away from the business world, but he was still ahead of several of those before him.
But she wasn't like them, not in most ways. She was successful, yes, but that was due to her ease in adapting to circumstances, not predicting them. Her lifetime earnings could never touch that of Sesshoumaru's, even the company he had started from scratch at the age of 18, leading in the background as a test of himself, seeing if he could raise a company without the grand name of Masaharu plastered on it. Indeed, these days, anything touched by the Masaharu's turned to gold. Though it seemed, if her plan was to succeed, the Masaharu line rested on the unsettled shoulders of InuYasha. And since all demons could control the conception of offspring, it was unlikely for InuYasha to produce an heir without a mate; and nearly as unlikely that he would mate. He was a free spirit, and had told her several times over that there was one girl for him, and if he never found her he'd live this crazy rock star lifestyle forever and never look back.
"Kagome."
She jumped, caught off-guard so deep in her thoughts.
Sesshoumaru's hand was stretched out to her, his feet already settled on the stones outside.
She smiled softly, a bit of heat rising in her cheeks as she reached out and took his hand, pulled easily out. The driver, she did not know his name, tipped his hat to them before shutting the door and returning to his seat, the limo pulling away out of the glow.
-
Sesshoumaru held out his arm to Kagome, forever aware of society's standards and the press' cameras. This, though a place he had visited many times with Kagome, had also been bought up under one of the various companies baring the golden touch of the Masaharu's and was innately a restaurant to the stars. Though, in all the crowd, few names were screamed louder than his own, the female population still clinging to him though he had no connection to their usual market. He supposed it came from being related to InuYasha, whose name and face could be found plastered up and down the city streets, on bottles and bags and boxes on six of the seven continents, and even upon the seas in the yachts of various rich fan girls. As much as he hated to admit it, the two of them made the best-looking brothers in all of Japan, indeed, under the opinion of most, the world. And his bottomless fortune, growing every day, also added to his appeal.
Kagome slipped her hand into the crook of his elbow, her fingers playing gently across the fabric of his suit as they walked between the red velvet ropes, cameras flashing, girls and women alike calling out to him, his blood boiling as he heard the few men among the crowd calling to Kagome.
They reached the door and disappeared inside, the man behind the ledger, his back turned, calling out, "Without a reservation, we are indefinitely full."
Kagome gave a small laugh, her eyes dancing as he chuckled softly.
"My dear Mr. Chesney, does your mouth move to other words?" She called softly, laughter still playing across her voice in the amused smile she wore.
The man turned, his green eyes instantly alive and wide as he grinned; "Masaharu! Four months? Not even a letter? If it hadn't been for the newspapers I'd have feared you dead!"
He let a small smirk grace his lips, "Chesney, there is more to life than food and women."
Chesney's eyes grew yet wider, his mouth still fixed in the same childish grin; "You say as you stand comfortably with the beautiful Ms. Kagome hanging on your arm and returning home to warm your bed."
From anyone else, that comment would have been completely unacceptable. But he had grown up with Adrian Chesney and there was little the man could say or do little that, in his eyes, was forbidden. Truly, Adrian Chesney was his most trusted right hand man, though not always in business, as he preferred his restaurant above everything but women and old friends, but in nearly everything else Chesney was to be trusted.
Kagome glowed scarlet, but the smile upon her almost cherry-red lips seemed undefeatable; "And how is it that you are privilege to such facts, Adrian?"
He leaned over to her and whispered; "Your mate there is a bit of a bragger, awfully fond of your skills."
Kagome's tinkling laugh calmed him. He was right in this, all but a slight sadness lingering beneath was gone from her scent, the brighter scent of her happiness easing his small tensions.
"Well, if you go by your standards, Chesney, I'm still missing one of the two on your eternal, yet short, list."
Adrian slapped his palm on a stone ledge, water cascading down into a small pool amid the tropical plants.
"We've always got a table for anyone baring the name Masaharu. Kagome, you're out of luck."
He laughed, something he rarely did, the deep rumble quiet, but a laugh nonetheless.
He smirked, turning to Adrian; "But then I'll again be incomplete on the list. And would you really send such a lady away. I didn't peg you as one for sending away gorgeous women."
Adrian pretended to think it over for a moment; "You're right, it wouldn't suit; it'd squash all my work to make myself look like a gentleman."
Without another word he began weaving quickly through tables with the grace of someone who has done such a thing their entire life, his feet quick and certain in their movements as he beckoned them after him.
-
Kagome let Adrian pull out her chair, sitting with acquired ease as he slipped the comfortable seat back beneath her.
"Thank you, Adrian."
"Just looking for an opportunity to look down your top, Ms. Kagome," he answered, grinning with a wink before he turned to Sesshoumaru.
"A word?" Adrian asked, the teasing tone gone from his voice though it had yet to even border on serious.
-
Adrian let Sesshoumaru follow him a short way into a side room, ducking into the door and closing it behind Sesshoumaru.
"Broken her, have you?"
Sesshoumaru nodded slightly, "Last night, it was a decision I made in anger, but it doesn't seem to have turned against me yet."
He considered this for a moment, the quiet stretching between them for a moment; "InuYasha?"
"Nani?" Sesshoumaru replied, flinching slightly at the mention of his half brother.
"Does InuYasha know yet?"
"No, but he must have known something was going to happen. He can't believe that the two of them over-stepping rules and boundaries already stretched to the limit would go unpunished."
He nodded, not yet understanding completely, but this wasn't the time. They would talk about it, it was inevitable, they always talked. Sesshoumaru did not need the advice, or the "comfort" of sharing, but they would talk. Mostly because Adrian needed to know. If something happened he was the only other person besides Kagome who could calm Sesshoumaru, and if he wasn't aware that there may be a situation arising in the near future, he wouldn't know when to act.
-
Kagome looked around the classy, upscale restaurant, her eyes instantly drawn to the cameras, hands, and faces pressed against the glass of one window. She turned her eyes to their target table, trying to get a glimpse of the undoubtedly famous couple that had to be sitting there, most likely glowing in that superficial way that most stars did under such attentions. But her glance was denied by a sudden rush of black suits, the disappearance of a Mr. Adrian Chesney the press' chance to rush upon the duo.
She stood, her curiosity getting the better of her, as it always did. She had only just raised her foot to take a step forward when a flash of silver caught her eye through a gap in the mass of black, InuYasha's deep laughter rising above the chatter and questions to reach her ears.
"Oh," she said softly, smiling at the thought of InuYasha's grin under all that attention.
With such high profile parents as the Masaharu's, their children could not help but grow up in the public eye. Ever since he was born, InuYasha's daily walks in the park with his mother were taped by news cameras, reporters creeping along behind them or being bold enough to jump out with their questions. As such, it had come as no surprise when InuYasha turned out to adore being in the spotlight. Where most stars soon found the attention they gained tiresome and intrusive, InuYasha never seemed fake his attitude under the stare of the public, because he really did enjoy every second of it. The presence of cameras only seem to enhance his personality, his eyes truly sparkling like few other pairs did under the constant pressure. He had always been a person who lived for the moment, and it only seemed to double the effect on his energy if that moment happened to be caught on camera.
"Anything wrong, Kagome?"
"N- no," she giggled, watching Adrian stalk toward the group of reporters, his green eyes glinting with mischief as the unsuspecting crowd continued to shout out answers.
Soon, the cloud of reports was falling apart, black suits trying to blend in and disappear around corners or among large parties. The waiters were shoving them out from the back hall, the cook yelling loudly in Russian as three were tossed, quite literally, from the kitchen doorway. After a moment, the quiet laughter of the customers reigned, and the tinkling of glass and silverware again blended pleasantly into the hum of conversation.
But Kagome was not watching the scrambling reporters, or the wide smile that had again conquered the face of Adrian Chesney; no, her wide-eyed gaze was settled on InuYasha's hand. More importantly, the fact that InuYasha's hand was holding another woman's, a very small, feminine woman with perfectly manicured red nails. Another woman with long, flowing black hair, and cold brown eyes. And that woman was practically in his lap, her fingers playing seductively over his jaw line as she whispered something or other in his ear, something that made the corners of his mouth turn up in a smirk that lit up his amber eyes.
If that doesnt prove he doesn't need you, I don't know what will. He's happy, any idiot can tell that the sparkle in his eye is real, and you know from his shoulders, he doesn't mind holding hands with her. And you know it; you've always known it. So why the hell does it hurt so much?
Kagome had never been one for lying, not to herself at least; and so she wasn't going to deny it; it hurt.
It hurt a lot more than she had anticipated, seeing him there with another girl, with another sex toy attached to his arm. He'd had them before, sex toys and girlfriends and friends with benefits; she doubted very much if the man had spent a night alone since his first album went triple platinum; so she hardly noticed anymore, hardly saw them anyway unless she picked up a magazine. She'd even go as far as to say that when she did see them, or meet them, or learn their names, she didn't care. But this time, she cared, god, did she care. And to state the obvious truth, it had everything to do with the fact that his latest choice could be her twin.
Ive been replaced
It was true, she had been replaced. Kikyo looked like her at least, and though she didnt know the womans personality she understood the underlying message. Kikyo was Kagome, without the tears, without the strings, and without Sesshoumaru.
It hadnt been easy to choose between the two brothers, InuYasha being her elementary school crush and high school sweetheart, while Sesshoumaru had been her college fling. At the time, both brothers had led the same lifestyle; sex when they wanted it and with whom they wanted it, no strings attached. And the both of them had the charm, the looks, and the sex appeal to pull off for several years beyond college. But slowly, over the course of two years, her fling with Sesshoumaru had ceased to be a fling and had morphed into something else, something she had wanted her entire life. But her love for InuYasha was still part of the equation, and it had been her hardest decision to choose, to have to turn down one brother for the other, to have to attach herself to one of two forever.
At first, InuYasha had been upset, deadened even. But after the first minute, he was beyond that, he was beyond grief and beyond depression and beyond tears, he had simply screamed, simply thrown a fit with the intensity of a three year old and the might of a youkai that had torn her room to bits. He hadnt touched her, not that she had expected him too, and after a few hours he had given in to his tears, flinching every time she spoke, jerking away when she touched him; for months, he had devoted his life to his music, creating a world without her at all. And that had been hard too, and it had almost made her regret her decision; but she couldnt hurt both brothers, even if one was to be healed, she couldnt do it to Sesshoumaru now that she had known what it was really going to do.
Once InuYasha had gotten his recording contract and started work on his first album, no one saw him for weeks. It worried her to no end, though every time she called the secretary at the recording studio the woman calmly and patiently explained that InuYasha had shown up, and that he hadnt missed a day, and that he hadnt mentioned taking a vacation. One day, nearly two months after she had turned him down, he showed up on her door step, looking like he hadnt slept all night and close to tears, his golden eyes hauntingly full of worry and pain.
Theyd talked for hours, InuYasha finally able to let her go, though she could see how much it still hurt him. He hadnt left until past midnight, and neither had wanted him to go, though they both knew he should. The next day, his album had come out, and Kagome had found nearly half the songs about her, all of them bringing her to the brink of guilt each time she listened.
And even up to this moment, she wasnt sure if she had gotten it right.
Kagome?
Can we go home now? She asked softly, her head swimming.
Sesshoumaru turned her in his arms, raising one hand to her chin to level her eyes with his. He studied her for a moment, part of her enjoying his undivided attention while another was screaming for him to decide so that she could disappear before InuYasha or Kikyo noticed her.
Lets go, he whispered, his hand still holding her face momentarily before he finally let her go, his arm loosening to allow her free movement.
Kagome was almost halfway to the door, her arm casually linked with Sesshoumarus, when InuYashas voice cut into her, sending a whole other stream of memories whipping violently through her; Kagome! Hey, Sesshoumaru; come join us!
Kagome placed an agreeable smile on her face, looking up to see Sesshoumarus grimace transform itself into an expressionless line before she turned to see InuYasha beckoning them, Kikyos eyes clearly screaming at Kagome to leave, because she was interrupting.
Hey InuYasha-chan! She called back, letting Sesshoumaru lead her back to their booth.
InuYasha stood, and waited for Kagome to slip her arm from Sesshoumarus before he greeted her with a tight hug.
Kagome, I- He stopped suddenly, frowning, his nose twitching in a discontented sort of way as he pulled back to look at her.
For a moment, Kagome was confused, and then she was horrified. InuYasha locked her gaze, cocking his head for a moment and taking another sniff, his eyes suddenly wide with intense shock. For about a second, Kagome held the hope that he would be smart enough to keep it to himself, to just pull away and pretend nothing was different. But InuYashas amber orbs were slowly filling with rage, his whole body quivering with it.
-
InuYasha turned to Sesshoumaru, an unbelievable anger coursing through him with a wild pulse of its own, every last inch of his skin flaming, all his nerves vibrating in uncontrollable hate.
You fucking bastard, he hissed, feeling the heat of his anger rise within him, the small part of him that was still rational trying to calm him before he was gone, before his eyes were as red as the blood he wanted so badly to spill.
You broke her? Shes human, and you fucking broke her? Do you have any idea- that- shes not- His words were jumbled in the sudden mass of things he wanted to scream at Sesshoumaru, his anger simply beyond expression as his fists clenched.
Does she appear to have been so negatively effected? Sesshoumaru asked, his voice cool and rational, his façade untouchable. But right then, InuYasha wanted nothing more than to rip his cold features into unidentifiable pieces.
Have you any fucking idea the complications that might have? She has thoughts you fuck-off, the negative effects dont have to be visible to be real! He was screaming now, his arms flying wildly as he both tried and tried to stop himself from killing Sesshoumaru at that very moment.
He turned to Kagome for a moment, moving his hand around her left hip until his fingers found the ends of fabric, course and recently ripped, the skin in the area warm, the shape of a crescent moon slightly raised beneath his palm.
A breaking mark, Sesshoumaru? Did you tell her, did you fucking tell her what that thing does? Did you warn her?
Of course she knows. Does she look the least bit curious to you?
-
Kagome watched InuYasha scream, feeling somehow detached from the whole scene. She watched in slowed time the calm response that passed over Sesshoumarus lips, every syllable seeming to take days to form and fall into the next. Something about the whole situation felt so unreal, and, without feeling in control, she found herself reaching out to the both of them, one of her hands finding InuYashas arm, though Sesshoumaru suddenly seemed miles away as she tried to reach. At the feeling of InuYashas skin, reality flew back full force, causing her to flinch.
No, Sesshoumaru, but since when do you know? You dont fucking know anything, you dont care if you do! It doesnt have to happen now; hours, days, weeks; shes only human!
They were fighting, she realized, and then instantly wondered why it was a shock. But this was worse than usual; InuYasha had never been so explosive in public before, and Sesshoumarus deadly calm seemed to be faltering as InuYasha continued to yell, his eyes flickering crimson as Sesshoumaru responded to his shouts. And she hated it, she hated the fact that they were fighting over her, fighting and screaming over something that was focused on her, something that couldnt be changed no matter how much InuYasha yelled or how cold Sesshoumarus eyes grew. In fact, that went for her life as well, because they would never agree.
Please She said, digging her fingers into InuYashas arm in a desperate attempt to grab his attention.
Sess- What Kag? He asked, turning to her, the red instantly gone from his eyes and his voice lacking any anger, the hate that had dripped so venomously from his mouth gone.
Please, dont fight; I just wanna go home
InuYasha gazed at her for a moment, his eyes passing over her for a moment to the shocked faces of the other celebrities, their eating long since interrupted by his rant.
Sesshoumaru stood, shoving InuYasha away and ripping his arm from her grasp.
Sessho, please, enough
Sesshoumaru gave her a stern look before he turned back to InuYasha, his form practically oozing the total rage that he had tried to hide; InuYasha, I will not warn you again not to get involved, I will go straight to dealing with it.
Kagome whimpered softly, sliding her hand into Sesshoumarus, tugging him toward the door in her sudden desperation to escape.
Sessho,,,
He turned and followed her out, their limo already waiting outside the doors. Those outside seemed to have little knowledge of the fight that had just taken place, their manner having changed little from that of nearly an hour ago. Adrian gave Sesshoumaru a dark look, not aimed at Sesshoumaru, but one ominous of resent events as he opened their door, letting them slip in before he snapped it shut.
Home, Sesshoumaru said curtly, his face already molding itself to discontentment and dislike in the almost complete darkness.
She leaned into him, snuggling into his chest when his arm rose to allow her closer, falling back around her bare shoulders.
Im sorry, Sessho, I-
You only stopped it, you had little to do with its beginnings.
She looked up at him for a moment, rising to kiss him on the cheek. Sesshoumaru turned his head at the last moment, their lips meeting gently as Kagome gasped in pleasant surprise.
Slowly, her hand rose to brush against his neck, her thoughts slowing as she gave in to the simple pleasure of his lips against hers, resisting the sudden need to analyze the situation, to do anything beyond reminding herself to enjoy it while it lasted. Because this was going to be the last time. She let out a strangled growl, the sudden jolt of pain she had felt transferring into the moment.
-
Sesshoumaru pulled back slowly, the low sound seeming odd coming from Kagome. There was something unnatural about her scent, a pain that hadnt been there a moment ago.
Kagome?
She stared at him for a moment, the answer to his unspoken question hidden indefinitely behind her eyes. He raised a hand to her face, running his thumb gently across her lips, trying to coax her into telling him. He was suddenly edging on fear, fear that InuYasha had been right, fear that consequences were coming, and fear that maybe Kagome was hurt in a way he couldnt see, or fix, because he had been the cause of it.
Kagome, please? He silently cursed the almost pleading tone that had slipped into those words somewhere between the thought and his mouth.
I I cant I-
She leaned back into him, pressing her lithe form against him as her lips molded to his, her hand sliding down to grip his shoulder tightly, as if she didnt want to let him go, as if she was afraid to let him go.
He let Kagome decide when the kiss was over, and he was already watching as she opened her ocean blue eyes, clear pain glazing them lighter, the intensity shocking.
Kagome?
The door opened suddenly, and they both turned, Kougas face twisted between realization and the calm nonchalance he normally held.
Sorry to interrupt, Masaharu-sama, Ms. Kagome.
He nodded, taking Kagomes hand in his before he exited onto the front drive, pulling Kagome lightly with him. He wasted few steps, taking her directly to their room.
-
Kagome pulled away from him just inside the door, trying not to cry. She leaned down to take off her shoes, using the moment to cover up her sudden need to break contact with him. But, once her shoes were sitting next to the door, there was little way to avoid the moment she was both praying for and dreading.
Kagome?
She turned to Sesshoumaru, the dread fading at the quiet concern in his amber eyes. His arms opened, inviting her to snuggle in the middle and confess, confess and talk and cry and do whatever she wanted until she didnt need to anymore. But she wouldnt confess, she wouldnt talk, and shed try very hard not to cry; because she wanted to be close one last time, she wanted to be with him now so she could remember it, so she could have that innate sense of his affection for just another moment.
She started slowly, but by the time she was halfway across their room, she was running to him, every ounce of her quivering with the anticipation of being in his grasp, of being under him, of being one with him.
-
Sesshoumaru caught Kagome, letting himself fall back onto the sheets, Kagomes arms warm around his neck as her lips met his, a hunger in her that he had yet to understand. Normally after he fought with InuYasha, Kagome would distance herself from him, spending most of her night in the library until she wandered in around midnight, falling exhausted into bed.
But now, now the woman on top of him seemed insatiable, her lips refusing to leave his for nothing other than the briefest of moments, her eyes, when he caught them, glazed with something he couldnt quite grasp.
Kagome paused for a moment, rising above him, her eyes flashing slightly in the gentle glow of his bedside lamp. He moved one hand from her hip to her chin, holding her gaze with his. Her gaze seemed haunted, a pain there he couldnt explain. Beyond that, she seemed detached, all other emotion gone from her eyes, disappearing somewhere between the pain and the slow glazing over of her round blue orbs.
Kagomes lips quivered slightly, and the almost uncatchable scent of her coming tears drifted briefly past his nose, flickering in and out of his awareness for a moment. He ran his thumb slowly over her bottom lip, then pressed a hand to her upper back, guiding her back down to his lips, back down into his arms.
-
Kagome couldnt understand why she had to care so much, why she had to understand what was going to happen and have feelings about the situation. She wanted to break away from it, lose herself to a point where nothing mattered, and then she could keep going. Of course, with Sesshoumarus hands running up and down her bare back, leaving tingling impressions, she wasnt going to be able to break away from anything, let alone her intense need to feel his skin against hers for eternity.
She pushed herself from his chest, her lips never leaving his as she unbuttoned his collared shirt and suit jacket, pushing them both away until the cotton of his beater met her fingers. She shoved the material up, breaking her contact for just long enough to let him toss everything away. She sighed as her hands met bare skin, the smooth hardness of his abs almost burning beneath her fingers.
- Lemolaid -
-
Sesshoumaru cut the halter of Kagomes dress, pulling the tight fabric away from her chest before he let her lean back against him, her skin pressed against his as he kissed her, his tongue gently entering her mouth to dance with hers, his hands running up and down her sides, finally settling just under her breasts, his thumbs rubbing the skin just below her nipples. He felt her moan more that he heard it, her hand sliding down to the waistband of his pants, her fingers dipping in to dance just beneath. He groaned softly, nipping at her bottom lip as she tried to slide down, his hands holding her in place. He was going to make that pain in her eyes disappear.
-
Kagome let Sesshoumaru push her onto her back, his lips leaving hers to make a slow trail up her jaw before he moved back down, breaking his path to continue down her neck, nipping at any spot that made her shiver. Her hands tangled in his sliver locks, her fingers sliding among the silk as he paid special attention to her mark, earning a small gasp every time he ran his tongue across the marks of his fangs.
-
Sesshoumaru moved from her mark down her collarbone, nibbling at the hollow and continuing down until he was nipping at the edges of each breast, her eyes closed as she gasped occasionally, a sensitive spot causing her to shiver in delight. He moved to her left breast, flicking his tongue across the tip, causing her to arch under him as she moaned. He smirked, taking the nipple into his mouth, running his fangs across it. Every one of her moans sent an odd jolt through him, his groans only seeming to excite her more. He crossed the hollow again, flicking his tongue across the tip of her right nipple before paying it the same attentions as its twin, his left hand finding her other breast before continuing down to the edge of her dress, his lips following the same path to where the material bunch around her waist.
He slid the dress off, sending her panties with it and tossing them off behind him before continuing his trail, drifting to the right to tease her hip, moving all the way down to her knee, her hands having since left his hair to grip the sheets.
-
Kagome moaned in sweet torture, Sesshoumarus tongue playing slow circles up the inside of her right thigh. After what seemed like years of the slow caress, he reached her center, and Kagome felt the cool tip of his nose edge against her folds as his deep breath tickled her, causing another shiver and a small moan. He nibbled each of her lips, earning gasps and moans as she twisted, trying to get him to hit her sensitive bud, to bring her to peak.
Finally, Sesshoumaru sucked her clitoris into his mouth, causing her to rise from the sheets as she tried to keep the contact. But he placed both hands on her hips, holding her down as he gently licked and tasted each bit, always avoiding sending her over. She moaned softly, her hair sticking to her neck in the sheen of sweat that was slowly covering her whole body.
She was quite unprepared when he thrust three fingers into her, sucking her clit into his mouth, his groan vibrating against her. She nearly screamed in ecstasy, riding the pulse of her release until it was only a dull beat between her legs.
Sesshoumaru climbed back up to her, his fingers slick as she tasted herself in his kiss. He positioned himself around her hips, slowly entering her, his tease apparently not yet begun. He pressed himself tight against her, pausing for a moment before drawing himself slowly backward, almost leaving her, only to repeat the slow process again and again until the both of them were panting.
Sessho
He groaned, quickening his pace until she was at a loss to keep up, though she hardly noticed as he thrust her into the bed, waves of pleasure overtaking her with his every move. He grunted into her, his thumbs flicking across her nipples and causing her to moan as she hit another peak.
He moaned loud and long, his pace slowing as he fell into his own release, his form tense for a moment before he leaned down onto her, crushing her breasts between them as he kissed her, his tongue running along hers.
- I Need to Go Make More Lemolaid -
-
Sesshoumaru rolled to the left, pulling Kagome with him until his back hit the sheets, holding her to his chest as sleep tried to overtake him, his eyes sliding closed even as he fought to keep them open.
I love you Kagome whispered, her soft voice reaching his ears in a calming way, only lulling him further to the point of no return.
-
Kagome rested her face in her right hand, her elbow sinking slightly into the mattress, her other hand resting over Sesshoumarus heart. His face was calm in his sleep, his chest lightly rising and falling beneath her fingers. He didnt look much like he was when he was awake, she decided. He looked happier, more human, as in he looked more capable of emotions, not weaker. She sighed softly, her hand sliding up his chest to run his fingers against his lips, moving up to drift across his soft eyelashes.
She sighed; tears gathering as she slowly slipped the arm from around her waist, rolling away though her hand seemed reluctant to leave his face. He shivered and twisted, his arms reaching out for her. She drew in a gasping breath, a sob locked in her throat because she wouldnt let it out, not until she was safely out.
Kagome climbed from the bed, quickly tucking the sheets tight around Sesshoumaru, part of her hoping he would wake, while the other part was praying for him to keep sleeping, to keep dreaming just a little bit longer.
She walked quickly to her closet, trying to hold herself together as she shoved clothes into a small duffle, her eyes still drawn to the doorway.
You dont have to go; you can drop this bag and go back to bed.
She held back another sob, zipping the bag closed and sinking to the floor for a moment, her face in her hands.
Calm down, Kagome, she whispered, just loud enough to hear her own voice.
After a moment she stood again, pulling on a pair of jeans and a bra. She was about to pull out one of her own shirts when Sesshoumaru grunted in his sleep, mumbling something incoherent.
She grabbed her bag, popping into his closet, reaching into his hamper and pulling out a black long sleeve shirt, one that still smelled just like him, like everything she knew as comfort. She pulled it on, tucking the front into her jeans and pushing the sleeves up enough to use her hands.
Back out in the bedroom, she stood in the doorway, her bag in hand. She watched him, trying to find the strength to leave him alone in his bed. His bed, because thats what it was now; not her bed, not their bed, his . She choked back another sob, taking the stairs as quickly as she was capable of. And she didnt stop there; she raced through the halls and back into Sesshoumarus wing, stopping in front of the door to the library.
She opened the door slowly, leaving it open behind her as she headed purposely toward the back, stopping in front of the fire place. She reached into the bookcase, grabbing a small notebook with dog-eared corners and the edges of pages sticking out, her hand writing dotted along those visible bits.
She placed the book carefully into the duffel, rushing from the library and back to the front hall, opening and closing the front door, the guard raising his eyebrows at her.
Miss Kagome?
I need a car, she whispered.
The guard called for a car, having to wake the only soul in the garage before her little blue bug appeared out front, the driver also giving her an odd look.
She looked back at the house, knowing full well that every second she waited was giving Sesshoumaru the advantage, and a small part of her tried to keep her there, on the door step, because that part wanted to give him the advantage; regardless of the punishment, part of her was praying that he would find her, no matter how hard she tried; because then, at least, she had given it her all, and she had tried.
Thank you, she mumbled softly, tossing her duffel to the passenger seat as she slid into hers, gripping the steering wheel tightly.
Miss Kagome, would you like to leave a message of any kind for Masaharu-sama?
Tears blurred her vision, and she wiped them away quickly, trying to focus on the drive ahead of her.
T- tell him I, I love him, tell him that, and tell him Im sorry The last bit came out strangled in a sob she couldnt stop.
Without waiting for an answer, she shattered her own heart into impossibly small pieces as she drove off into the night.
--
-By CherryBlossomMiko
--
Disclaimer: I own InuYasha. I am also a pathological liar. But if Im a pathological liar, wouldnt I lie about that too
Summary: Kagome's feudal, lust-based relationship with Sesshoumaru is pushing her emotions every which way, confusing her and driving her insane. There's only one person in the world who can make everything crystal clear; her sanity. But now Kagome's feelings for him are what's causing her controversy; can she figure it out before she loses them both?
Pairings: Sesshoumaru/Kagome (beginning), really an InuYasha/Kagome
Rating: R; for language, adult themes, and adult situations.
Author's Note: Relish in it all; this is the last chapter for a while with any warm fuzzy feelings. But its not all happy Sorry, really I am
--
:: Chapter Five: Run ::
--
Sesshoumaru pushed away the small twinges of helplessness that tried to invade his mind. He could stop her tears; just being there, holding her. But really, she was always so much happier after she cried, so he would just wait.
Slowly, Kagomes sighs died away, tears only falling silently by the time the sun had set. He looked down at her, her face glowing in the soft light from the scattered lampposts.
You still want to go to dinner? He asked, smiling softly.
She let out a small smile, sniffling softly, Yeah, lets go.
He stood, pulling Kagome up with him, wrapping an arm around her slim waist. Kagome seemed slightly distracted, her eyes wondering fondly to different spots of the park, her eyes seeming to try and freeze the grass and the trees, even the sky, just as they were in that moment.
He rested his palm against her breaking mark, the warmth pressing gently into his hand. The breaking had yet to have the intended positive effect, but the negative effects seemed to be few, just her tears. Not that he wanted her to cry, in fact, he detested it, but if that was the extent of the damage, he could live with that.
Kagome left his side when they reached their bedroom, disappearing into the bathroom as the sounds and scents of her shower filled the bedroom. The scent of Kagomes tears seemed permanently saturated into his shirt, the salty tinge that kept floating up to him along with the sakura that was always present in the places she was. He pulled the t-shirt over his head, tossing it off into a corner.
-
Kagome let the warm water wash down her front, only slightly relaxing the tension she felt. She sighed softly, washing quickly and ending the flow of water, stepping out into a small cloud of mist. She dried off, tossing the towel into the wash before wrapping her green silk robe around her, leaving the sash undone. Her hair, neatly pinned, was uncomfortable, and she expertly removed the clips and scrunchies, letting her hair once again fly free.
A small part of her was calling to Sesshoumaru, wanting him to come in again and run his fingers delicately through her hair. She sighed, suppressing the sudden urge to call him in, and forced herself to reach out for the brush. Before her hand was even close, long, gentle fingers were winding into her locks. She smiled softly, letting her eyes slide closed as Sesshoumaru continued to run his fingers down her back. He finally picked up the brush; though after his fingers her hair hardly needed it. She sighed contentedly, trying to forget that she was going to have to leave all this soon.
-
Sesshoumaru pulled Kagome back against his chest, her hair not at once distinguishable from the cool silk of her robe. He licked once at her mark, flicking his tongue across the pink marks of his fangs as he slid the robe from underneath his fingers, letting his hands rest flat against the smooth skin of her stomach.
I thought we were going to dinner, she whispered softly, running her hands up and down his arms.
He growled playfully, nipping at her ear before turning and walking quickly into his closet, picking a classic black suit from the hanger and changing.
-
Kagome looked around in her closet, her hand pressed against her breaking mark, fully aware that it had to show no matter what she wore.
Sessho, she called softly, turning when he entered, slipping his suit jacket over an unbuttoned shirt.
Can you cut a hole in one of these? She whispered softly, running her hand down a line of dresses.
He chuckled softly, covering her hand with his own for a moment. He flipped through them for only a moment before choosing one, placing it against her for a moment before using one of his claws to cut a round hole in the left hip.
Thanks She whispered softly, her feelings extremely mixed and confused as he left.
She slipped into the dress, arranging the hole over her breaking mark, the purple crescent still glowing. The dress was a simple white one, the skirt a few inches above her knee on the left, rippling down to a few inches under on the left. The dress was almost strapless, a thin white elastic cord wrapping around the back of her neck.
She smoothed out the dress, slipping into a comfortable pair of white dress heels. She walked back out into the room, finding Sesshoumaru lounging in his work alcove, though the computer was off and the chair was turned to face the room.
She ducked into the bathroom briefly, deciding against the make-up besides a small dap of gloss to her already dark pink lips. She clipped a bit of her hair up, leaving most of it free around her before returning to the bedroom.
Ready, she announced quietly, shaking a piece of hair from her eyes.
Sesshoumaru stood, his suit instantly falling into precise lines that were obviously tailored for his form. He walked up next to her, slipping an arm around her waist to place his palm gently against her breaking mark. She sighed softly, leaning into him. *Enjoy it while it lasts,* she reminded herself; blinking quickly to push away the tears she knew were coming.
The limo was already waiting for them out front, Ookami pulling the door open before the black vehicle even entered her view. Sesshoumaru stepped aside to let her in first, following her in and followed himself by a click as the door shut.
Sesshoumaru called forward an old favorite to the driver, leaning back into his seat as the floor vibrated in an almost undetectable way beneath them.
She sat fairly independently, remembering with a small smile the days when she would jokingly sit in his lap, leading to something not near as funny but twice as enjoyable. Things had been easier then, more fun then; they seemed two totally different lives when compared, the only constant being the presences of Sesshoumaru and InuYasha. Both of them had changed, indeed InuYasha had finally grown up when all those around him had thought he never would, a small part of her included. Most of the time, he was still the small person he'd been since he'd turned fifteen, but when the situation called for it he was almost dangerously serious, like he'd finally learned to determine the mood he should be in. Sesshoumaru had not changed much, she supposed. His instincts about her had changed, yes, but that was to be expected. After mating the instincts of a demon demanded different things, that was universal, and beyond that he hadn't really changed. He was still the more serious of the two brothers, the smartest. He still ran his business with exact precision, still able to determine people's decisions days before they made them.
All the same, with her issues extracted from the equation, everyone was the same. Sesshoumaru was still the anticipant businessman, and InuYasha was still the lethally sexy playboy. But that was where nearly all the family money lay, built upon generations of manipulating and entrancing men, the women almost hauntingly beautiful and nearly as efficient. Truly, she didn't fit into this world. The Masaharu family had often been pinned as the only perfectly legal mafia, though many thought it impossible for the Masaharu's to be so many steps ahead without doing something illegal. Every last Masaharu and their mates had been uncommonly successful, swelling nothing to billions before they had even been noticed. InuYasha had been the first to step away from the business world, but he was still ahead of several of those before him.
But she wasn't like them, not in most ways. She was successful, yes, but that was due to her ease in adapting to circumstances, not predicting them. Her lifetime earnings could never touch that of Sesshoumaru's, even the company he had started from scratch at the age of 18, leading in the background as a test of himself, seeing if he could raise a company without the grand name of Masaharu plastered on it. Indeed, these days, anything touched by the Masaharu's turned to gold. Though it seemed, if her plan was to succeed, the Masaharu line rested on the unsettled shoulders of InuYasha. And since all demons could control the conception of offspring, it was unlikely for InuYasha to produce an heir without a mate; and nearly as unlikely that he would mate. He was a free spirit, and had told her several times over that there was one girl for him, and if he never found her he'd live this crazy rock star lifestyle forever and never look back.
"Kagome."
She jumped, caught off-guard so deep in her thoughts.
Sesshoumaru's hand was stretched out to her, his feet already settled on the stones outside.
She smiled softly, a bit of heat rising in her cheeks as she reached out and took his hand, pulled easily out. The driver, she did not know his name, tipped his hat to them before shutting the door and returning to his seat, the limo pulling away out of the glow.
-
Sesshoumaru held out his arm to Kagome, forever aware of society's standards and the press' cameras. This, though a place he had visited many times with Kagome, had also been bought up under one of the various companies baring the golden touch of the Masaharu's and was innately a restaurant to the stars. Though, in all the crowd, few names were screamed louder than his own, the female population still clinging to him though he had no connection to their usual market. He supposed it came from being related to InuYasha, whose name and face could be found plastered up and down the city streets, on bottles and bags and boxes on six of the seven continents, and even upon the seas in the yachts of various rich fan girls. As much as he hated to admit it, the two of them made the best-looking brothers in all of Japan, indeed, under the opinion of most, the world. And his bottomless fortune, growing every day, also added to his appeal.
Kagome slipped her hand into the crook of his elbow, her fingers playing gently across the fabric of his suit as they walked between the red velvet ropes, cameras flashing, girls and women alike calling out to him, his blood boiling as he heard the few men among the crowd calling to Kagome.
They reached the door and disappeared inside, the man behind the ledger, his back turned, calling out, "Without a reservation, we are indefinitely full."
Kagome gave a small laugh, her eyes dancing as he chuckled softly.
"My dear Mr. Chesney, does your mouth move to other words?" She called softly, laughter still playing across her voice in the amused smile she wore.
The man turned, his green eyes instantly alive and wide as he grinned; "Masaharu! Four months? Not even a letter? If it hadn't been for the newspapers I'd have feared you dead!"
He let a small smirk grace his lips, "Chesney, there is more to life than food and women."
Chesney's eyes grew yet wider, his mouth still fixed in the same childish grin; "You say as you stand comfortably with the beautiful Ms. Kagome hanging on your arm and returning home to warm your bed."
From anyone else, that comment would have been completely unacceptable. But he had grown up with Adrian Chesney and there was little the man could say or do little that, in his eyes, was forbidden. Truly, Adrian Chesney was his most trusted right hand man, though not always in business, as he preferred his restaurant above everything but women and old friends, but in nearly everything else Chesney was to be trusted.
Kagome glowed scarlet, but the smile upon her almost cherry-red lips seemed undefeatable; "And how is it that you are privilege to such facts, Adrian?"
He leaned over to her and whispered; "Your mate there is a bit of a bragger, awfully fond of your skills."
Kagome's tinkling laugh calmed him. He was right in this, all but a slight sadness lingering beneath was gone from her scent, the brighter scent of her happiness easing his small tensions.
"Well, if you go by your standards, Chesney, I'm still missing one of the two on your eternal, yet short, list."
Adrian slapped his palm on a stone ledge, water cascading down into a small pool amid the tropical plants.
"We've always got a table for anyone baring the name Masaharu. Kagome, you're out of luck."
He laughed, something he rarely did, the deep rumble quiet, but a laugh nonetheless.
He smirked, turning to Adrian; "But then I'll again be incomplete on the list. And would you really send such a lady away. I didn't peg you as one for sending away gorgeous women."
Adrian pretended to think it over for a moment; "You're right, it wouldn't suit; it'd squash all my work to make myself look like a gentleman."
Without another word he began weaving quickly through tables with the grace of someone who has done such a thing their entire life, his feet quick and certain in their movements as he beckoned them after him.
-
Kagome let Adrian pull out her chair, sitting with acquired ease as he slipped the comfortable seat back beneath her.
"Thank you, Adrian."
"Just looking for an opportunity to look down your top, Ms. Kagome," he answered, grinning with a wink before he turned to Sesshoumaru.
"A word?" Adrian asked, the teasing tone gone from his voice though it had yet to even border on serious.
-
Adrian let Sesshoumaru follow him a short way into a side room, ducking into the door and closing it behind Sesshoumaru.
"Broken her, have you?"
Sesshoumaru nodded slightly, "Last night, it was a decision I made in anger, but it doesn't seem to have turned against me yet."
He considered this for a moment, the quiet stretching between them for a moment; "InuYasha?"
"Nani?" Sesshoumaru replied, flinching slightly at the mention of his half brother.
"Does InuYasha know yet?"
"No, but he must have known something was going to happen. He can't believe that the two of them over-stepping rules and boundaries already stretched to the limit would go unpunished."
He nodded, not yet understanding completely, but this wasn't the time. They would talk about it, it was inevitable, they always talked. Sesshoumaru did not need the advice, or the "comfort" of sharing, but they would talk. Mostly because Adrian needed to know. If something happened he was the only other person besides Kagome who could calm Sesshoumaru, and if he wasn't aware that there may be a situation arising in the near future, he wouldn't know when to act.
-
Kagome looked around the classy, upscale restaurant, her eyes instantly drawn to the cameras, hands, and faces pressed against the glass of one window. She turned her eyes to their target table, trying to get a glimpse of the undoubtedly famous couple that had to be sitting there, most likely glowing in that superficial way that most stars did under such attentions. But her glance was denied by a sudden rush of black suits, the disappearance of a Mr. Adrian Chesney the press' chance to rush upon the duo.
She stood, her curiosity getting the better of her, as it always did. She had only just raised her foot to take a step forward when a flash of silver caught her eye through a gap in the mass of black, InuYasha's deep laughter rising above the chatter and questions to reach her ears.
"Oh," she said softly, smiling at the thought of InuYasha's grin under all that attention.
With such high profile parents as the Masaharu's, their children could not help but grow up in the public eye. Ever since he was born, InuYasha's daily walks in the park with his mother were taped by news cameras, reporters creeping along behind them or being bold enough to jump out with their questions. As such, it had come as no surprise when InuYasha turned out to adore being in the spotlight. Where most stars soon found the attention they gained tiresome and intrusive, InuYasha never seemed fake his attitude under the stare of the public, because he really did enjoy every second of it. The presence of cameras only seem to enhance his personality, his eyes truly sparkling like few other pairs did under the constant pressure. He had always been a person who lived for the moment, and it only seemed to double the effect on his energy if that moment happened to be caught on camera.
"Anything wrong, Kagome?"
"N- no," she giggled, watching Adrian stalk toward the group of reporters, his green eyes glinting with mischief as the unsuspecting crowd continued to shout out answers.
Soon, the cloud of reports was falling apart, black suits trying to blend in and disappear around corners or among large parties. The waiters were shoving them out from the back hall, the cook yelling loudly in Russian as three were tossed, quite literally, from the kitchen doorway. After a moment, the quiet laughter of the customers reigned, and the tinkling of glass and silverware again blended pleasantly into the hum of conversation.
But Kagome was not watching the scrambling reporters, or the wide smile that had again conquered the face of Adrian Chesney; no, her wide-eyed gaze was settled on InuYasha's hand. More importantly, the fact that InuYasha's hand was holding another woman's, a very small, feminine woman with perfectly manicured red nails. Another woman with long, flowing black hair, and cold brown eyes. And that woman was practically in his lap, her fingers playing seductively over his jaw line as she whispered something or other in his ear, something that made the corners of his mouth turn up in a smirk that lit up his amber eyes.
If that doesnt prove he doesn't need you, I don't know what will. He's happy, any idiot can tell that the sparkle in his eye is real, and you know from his shoulders, he doesn't mind holding hands with her. And you know it; you've always known it. So why the hell does it hurt so much?
Kagome had never been one for lying, not to herself at least; and so she wasn't going to deny it; it hurt.
It hurt a lot more than she had anticipated, seeing him there with another girl, with another sex toy attached to his arm. He'd had them before, sex toys and girlfriends and friends with benefits; she doubted very much if the man had spent a night alone since his first album went triple platinum; so she hardly noticed anymore, hardly saw them anyway unless she picked up a magazine. She'd even go as far as to say that when she did see them, or meet them, or learn their names, she didn't care. But this time, she cared, god, did she care. And to state the obvious truth, it had everything to do with the fact that his latest choice could be her twin.
Ive been replaced
It was true, she had been replaced. Kikyo looked like her at least, and though she didnt know the womans personality she understood the underlying message. Kikyo was Kagome, without the tears, without the strings, and without Sesshoumaru.
It hadnt been easy to choose between the two brothers, InuYasha being her elementary school crush and high school sweetheart, while Sesshoumaru had been her college fling. At the time, both brothers had led the same lifestyle; sex when they wanted it and with whom they wanted it, no strings attached. And the both of them had the charm, the looks, and the sex appeal to pull off for several years beyond college. But slowly, over the course of two years, her fling with Sesshoumaru had ceased to be a fling and had morphed into something else, something she had wanted her entire life. But her love for InuYasha was still part of the equation, and it had been her hardest decision to choose, to have to turn down one brother for the other, to have to attach herself to one of two forever.
At first, InuYasha had been upset, deadened even. But after the first minute, he was beyond that, he was beyond grief and beyond depression and beyond tears, he had simply screamed, simply thrown a fit with the intensity of a three year old and the might of a youkai that had torn her room to bits. He hadnt touched her, not that she had expected him too, and after a few hours he had given in to his tears, flinching every time she spoke, jerking away when she touched him; for months, he had devoted his life to his music, creating a world without her at all. And that had been hard too, and it had almost made her regret her decision; but she couldnt hurt both brothers, even if one was to be healed, she couldnt do it to Sesshoumaru now that she had known what it was really going to do.
Once InuYasha had gotten his recording contract and started work on his first album, no one saw him for weeks. It worried her to no end, though every time she called the secretary at the recording studio the woman calmly and patiently explained that InuYasha had shown up, and that he hadnt missed a day, and that he hadnt mentioned taking a vacation. One day, nearly two months after she had turned him down, he showed up on her door step, looking like he hadnt slept all night and close to tears, his golden eyes hauntingly full of worry and pain.
Theyd talked for hours, InuYasha finally able to let her go, though she could see how much it still hurt him. He hadnt left until past midnight, and neither had wanted him to go, though they both knew he should. The next day, his album had come out, and Kagome had found nearly half the songs about her, all of them bringing her to the brink of guilt each time she listened.
And even up to this moment, she wasnt sure if she had gotten it right.
Kagome?
Can we go home now? She asked softly, her head swimming.
Sesshoumaru turned her in his arms, raising one hand to her chin to level her eyes with his. He studied her for a moment, part of her enjoying his undivided attention while another was screaming for him to decide so that she could disappear before InuYasha or Kikyo noticed her.
Lets go, he whispered, his hand still holding her face momentarily before he finally let her go, his arm loosening to allow her free movement.
Kagome was almost halfway to the door, her arm casually linked with Sesshoumarus, when InuYashas voice cut into her, sending a whole other stream of memories whipping violently through her; Kagome! Hey, Sesshoumaru; come join us!
Kagome placed an agreeable smile on her face, looking up to see Sesshoumarus grimace transform itself into an expressionless line before she turned to see InuYasha beckoning them, Kikyos eyes clearly screaming at Kagome to leave, because she was interrupting.
Hey InuYasha-chan! She called back, letting Sesshoumaru lead her back to their booth.
InuYasha stood, and waited for Kagome to slip her arm from Sesshoumarus before he greeted her with a tight hug.
Kagome, I- He stopped suddenly, frowning, his nose twitching in a discontented sort of way as he pulled back to look at her.
For a moment, Kagome was confused, and then she was horrified. InuYasha locked her gaze, cocking his head for a moment and taking another sniff, his eyes suddenly wide with intense shock. For about a second, Kagome held the hope that he would be smart enough to keep it to himself, to just pull away and pretend nothing was different. But InuYashas amber orbs were slowly filling with rage, his whole body quivering with it.
-
InuYasha turned to Sesshoumaru, an unbelievable anger coursing through him with a wild pulse of its own, every last inch of his skin flaming, all his nerves vibrating in uncontrollable hate.
You fucking bastard, he hissed, feeling the heat of his anger rise within him, the small part of him that was still rational trying to calm him before he was gone, before his eyes were as red as the blood he wanted so badly to spill.
You broke her? Shes human, and you fucking broke her? Do you have any idea- that- shes not- His words were jumbled in the sudden mass of things he wanted to scream at Sesshoumaru, his anger simply beyond expression as his fists clenched.
Does she appear to have been so negatively effected? Sesshoumaru asked, his voice cool and rational, his façade untouchable. But right then, InuYasha wanted nothing more than to rip his cold features into unidentifiable pieces.
Have you any fucking idea the complications that might have? She has thoughts you fuck-off, the negative effects dont have to be visible to be real! He was screaming now, his arms flying wildly as he both tried and tried to stop himself from killing Sesshoumaru at that very moment.
He turned to Kagome for a moment, moving his hand around her left hip until his fingers found the ends of fabric, course and recently ripped, the skin in the area warm, the shape of a crescent moon slightly raised beneath his palm.
A breaking mark, Sesshoumaru? Did you tell her, did you fucking tell her what that thing does? Did you warn her?
Of course she knows. Does she look the least bit curious to you?
-
Kagome watched InuYasha scream, feeling somehow detached from the whole scene. She watched in slowed time the calm response that passed over Sesshoumarus lips, every syllable seeming to take days to form and fall into the next. Something about the whole situation felt so unreal, and, without feeling in control, she found herself reaching out to the both of them, one of her hands finding InuYashas arm, though Sesshoumaru suddenly seemed miles away as she tried to reach. At the feeling of InuYashas skin, reality flew back full force, causing her to flinch.
No, Sesshoumaru, but since when do you know? You dont fucking know anything, you dont care if you do! It doesnt have to happen now; hours, days, weeks; shes only human!
They were fighting, she realized, and then instantly wondered why it was a shock. But this was worse than usual; InuYasha had never been so explosive in public before, and Sesshoumarus deadly calm seemed to be faltering as InuYasha continued to yell, his eyes flickering crimson as Sesshoumaru responded to his shouts. And she hated it, she hated the fact that they were fighting over her, fighting and screaming over something that was focused on her, something that couldnt be changed no matter how much InuYasha yelled or how cold Sesshoumarus eyes grew. In fact, that went for her life as well, because they would never agree.
Please She said, digging her fingers into InuYashas arm in a desperate attempt to grab his attention.
Sess- What Kag? He asked, turning to her, the red instantly gone from his eyes and his voice lacking any anger, the hate that had dripped so venomously from his mouth gone.
Please, dont fight; I just wanna go home
InuYasha gazed at her for a moment, his eyes passing over her for a moment to the shocked faces of the other celebrities, their eating long since interrupted by his rant.
Sesshoumaru stood, shoving InuYasha away and ripping his arm from her grasp.
Sessho, please, enough
Sesshoumaru gave her a stern look before he turned back to InuYasha, his form practically oozing the total rage that he had tried to hide; InuYasha, I will not warn you again not to get involved, I will go straight to dealing with it.
Kagome whimpered softly, sliding her hand into Sesshoumarus, tugging him toward the door in her sudden desperation to escape.
Sessho,,,
He turned and followed her out, their limo already waiting outside the doors. Those outside seemed to have little knowledge of the fight that had just taken place, their manner having changed little from that of nearly an hour ago. Adrian gave Sesshoumaru a dark look, not aimed at Sesshoumaru, but one ominous of resent events as he opened their door, letting them slip in before he snapped it shut.
Home, Sesshoumaru said curtly, his face already molding itself to discontentment and dislike in the almost complete darkness.
She leaned into him, snuggling into his chest when his arm rose to allow her closer, falling back around her bare shoulders.
Im sorry, Sessho, I-
You only stopped it, you had little to do with its beginnings.
She looked up at him for a moment, rising to kiss him on the cheek. Sesshoumaru turned his head at the last moment, their lips meeting gently as Kagome gasped in pleasant surprise.
Slowly, her hand rose to brush against his neck, her thoughts slowing as she gave in to the simple pleasure of his lips against hers, resisting the sudden need to analyze the situation, to do anything beyond reminding herself to enjoy it while it lasted. Because this was going to be the last time. She let out a strangled growl, the sudden jolt of pain she had felt transferring into the moment.
-
Sesshoumaru pulled back slowly, the low sound seeming odd coming from Kagome. There was something unnatural about her scent, a pain that hadnt been there a moment ago.
Kagome?
She stared at him for a moment, the answer to his unspoken question hidden indefinitely behind her eyes. He raised a hand to her face, running his thumb gently across her lips, trying to coax her into telling him. He was suddenly edging on fear, fear that InuYasha had been right, fear that consequences were coming, and fear that maybe Kagome was hurt in a way he couldnt see, or fix, because he had been the cause of it.
Kagome, please? He silently cursed the almost pleading tone that had slipped into those words somewhere between the thought and his mouth.
I I cant I-
She leaned back into him, pressing her lithe form against him as her lips molded to his, her hand sliding down to grip his shoulder tightly, as if she didnt want to let him go, as if she was afraid to let him go.
He let Kagome decide when the kiss was over, and he was already watching as she opened her ocean blue eyes, clear pain glazing them lighter, the intensity shocking.
Kagome?
The door opened suddenly, and they both turned, Kougas face twisted between realization and the calm nonchalance he normally held.
Sorry to interrupt, Masaharu-sama, Ms. Kagome.
He nodded, taking Kagomes hand in his before he exited onto the front drive, pulling Kagome lightly with him. He wasted few steps, taking her directly to their room.
-
Kagome pulled away from him just inside the door, trying not to cry. She leaned down to take off her shoes, using the moment to cover up her sudden need to break contact with him. But, once her shoes were sitting next to the door, there was little way to avoid the moment she was both praying for and dreading.
Kagome?
She turned to Sesshoumaru, the dread fading at the quiet concern in his amber eyes. His arms opened, inviting her to snuggle in the middle and confess, confess and talk and cry and do whatever she wanted until she didnt need to anymore. But she wouldnt confess, she wouldnt talk, and shed try very hard not to cry; because she wanted to be close one last time, she wanted to be with him now so she could remember it, so she could have that innate sense of his affection for just another moment.
She started slowly, but by the time she was halfway across their room, she was running to him, every ounce of her quivering with the anticipation of being in his grasp, of being under him, of being one with him.
-
Sesshoumaru caught Kagome, letting himself fall back onto the sheets, Kagomes arms warm around his neck as her lips met his, a hunger in her that he had yet to understand. Normally after he fought with InuYasha, Kagome would distance herself from him, spending most of her night in the library until she wandered in around midnight, falling exhausted into bed.
But now, now the woman on top of him seemed insatiable, her lips refusing to leave his for nothing other than the briefest of moments, her eyes, when he caught them, glazed with something he couldnt quite grasp.
Kagome paused for a moment, rising above him, her eyes flashing slightly in the gentle glow of his bedside lamp. He moved one hand from her hip to her chin, holding her gaze with his. Her gaze seemed haunted, a pain there he couldnt explain. Beyond that, she seemed detached, all other emotion gone from her eyes, disappearing somewhere between the pain and the slow glazing over of her round blue orbs.
Kagomes lips quivered slightly, and the almost uncatchable scent of her coming tears drifted briefly past his nose, flickering in and out of his awareness for a moment. He ran his thumb slowly over her bottom lip, then pressed a hand to her upper back, guiding her back down to his lips, back down into his arms.
-
Kagome couldnt understand why she had to care so much, why she had to understand what was going to happen and have feelings about the situation. She wanted to break away from it, lose herself to a point where nothing mattered, and then she could keep going. Of course, with Sesshoumarus hands running up and down her bare back, leaving tingling impressions, she wasnt going to be able to break away from anything, let alone her intense need to feel his skin against hers for eternity.
She pushed herself from his chest, her lips never leaving his as she unbuttoned his collared shirt and suit jacket, pushing them both away until the cotton of his beater met her fingers. She shoved the material up, breaking her contact for just long enough to let him toss everything away. She sighed as her hands met bare skin, the smooth hardness of his abs almost burning beneath her fingers.
- Lemolaid -
-
Sesshoumaru cut the halter of Kagomes dress, pulling the tight fabric away from her chest before he let her lean back against him, her skin pressed against his as he kissed her, his tongue gently entering her mouth to dance with hers, his hands running up and down her sides, finally settling just under her breasts, his thumbs rubbing the skin just below her nipples. He felt her moan more that he heard it, her hand sliding down to the waistband of his pants, her fingers dipping in to dance just beneath. He groaned softly, nipping at her bottom lip as she tried to slide down, his hands holding her in place. He was going to make that pain in her eyes disappear.
-
Kagome let Sesshoumaru push her onto her back, his lips leaving hers to make a slow trail up her jaw before he moved back down, breaking his path to continue down her neck, nipping at any spot that made her shiver. Her hands tangled in his sliver locks, her fingers sliding among the silk as he paid special attention to her mark, earning a small gasp every time he ran his tongue across the marks of his fangs.
-
Sesshoumaru moved from her mark down her collarbone, nibbling at the hollow and continuing down until he was nipping at the edges of each breast, her eyes closed as she gasped occasionally, a sensitive spot causing her to shiver in delight. He moved to her left breast, flicking his tongue across the tip, causing her to arch under him as she moaned. He smirked, taking the nipple into his mouth, running his fangs across it. Every one of her moans sent an odd jolt through him, his groans only seeming to excite her more. He crossed the hollow again, flicking his tongue across the tip of her right nipple before paying it the same attentions as its twin, his left hand finding her other breast before continuing down to the edge of her dress, his lips following the same path to where the material bunch around her waist.
He slid the dress off, sending her panties with it and tossing them off behind him before continuing his trail, drifting to the right to tease her hip, moving all the way down to her knee, her hands having since left his hair to grip the sheets.
-
Kagome moaned in sweet torture, Sesshoumarus tongue playing slow circles up the inside of her right thigh. After what seemed like years of the slow caress, he reached her center, and Kagome felt the cool tip of his nose edge against her folds as his deep breath tickled her, causing another shiver and a small moan. He nibbled each of her lips, earning gasps and moans as she twisted, trying to get him to hit her sensitive bud, to bring her to peak.
Finally, Sesshoumaru sucked her clitoris into his mouth, causing her to rise from the sheets as she tried to keep the contact. But he placed both hands on her hips, holding her down as he gently licked and tasted each bit, always avoiding sending her over. She moaned softly, her hair sticking to her neck in the sheen of sweat that was slowly covering her whole body.
She was quite unprepared when he thrust three fingers into her, sucking her clit into his mouth, his groan vibrating against her. She nearly screamed in ecstasy, riding the pulse of her release until it was only a dull beat between her legs.
Sesshoumaru climbed back up to her, his fingers slick as she tasted herself in his kiss. He positioned himself around her hips, slowly entering her, his tease apparently not yet begun. He pressed himself tight against her, pausing for a moment before drawing himself slowly backward, almost leaving her, only to repeat the slow process again and again until the both of them were panting.
Sessho
He groaned, quickening his pace until she was at a loss to keep up, though she hardly noticed as he thrust her into the bed, waves of pleasure overtaking her with his every move. He grunted into her, his thumbs flicking across her nipples and causing her to moan as she hit another peak.
He moaned loud and long, his pace slowing as he fell into his own release, his form tense for a moment before he leaned down onto her, crushing her breasts between them as he kissed her, his tongue running along hers.
- I Need to Go Make More Lemolaid -
-
Sesshoumaru rolled to the left, pulling Kagome with him until his back hit the sheets, holding her to his chest as sleep tried to overtake him, his eyes sliding closed even as he fought to keep them open.
I love you Kagome whispered, her soft voice reaching his ears in a calming way, only lulling him further to the point of no return.
-
Kagome rested her face in her right hand, her elbow sinking slightly into the mattress, her other hand resting over Sesshoumarus heart. His face was calm in his sleep, his chest lightly rising and falling beneath her fingers. He didnt look much like he was when he was awake, she decided. He looked happier, more human, as in he looked more capable of emotions, not weaker. She sighed softly, her hand sliding up his chest to run his fingers against his lips, moving up to drift across his soft eyelashes.
She sighed; tears gathering as she slowly slipped the arm from around her waist, rolling away though her hand seemed reluctant to leave his face. He shivered and twisted, his arms reaching out for her. She drew in a gasping breath, a sob locked in her throat because she wouldnt let it out, not until she was safely out.
Kagome climbed from the bed, quickly tucking the sheets tight around Sesshoumaru, part of her hoping he would wake, while the other part was praying for him to keep sleeping, to keep dreaming just a little bit longer.
She walked quickly to her closet, trying to hold herself together as she shoved clothes into a small duffle, her eyes still drawn to the doorway.
You dont have to go; you can drop this bag and go back to bed.
She held back another sob, zipping the bag closed and sinking to the floor for a moment, her face in her hands.
Calm down, Kagome, she whispered, just loud enough to hear her own voice.
After a moment she stood again, pulling on a pair of jeans and a bra. She was about to pull out one of her own shirts when Sesshoumaru grunted in his sleep, mumbling something incoherent.
She grabbed her bag, popping into his closet, reaching into his hamper and pulling out a black long sleeve shirt, one that still smelled just like him, like everything she knew as comfort. She pulled it on, tucking the front into her jeans and pushing the sleeves up enough to use her hands.
Back out in the bedroom, she stood in the doorway, her bag in hand. She watched him, trying to find the strength to leave him alone in his bed. His bed, because thats what it was now; not her bed, not their bed, his . She choked back another sob, taking the stairs as quickly as she was capable of. And she didnt stop there; she raced through the halls and back into Sesshoumarus wing, stopping in front of the door to the library.
She opened the door slowly, leaving it open behind her as she headed purposely toward the back, stopping in front of the fire place. She reached into the bookcase, grabbing a small notebook with dog-eared corners and the edges of pages sticking out, her hand writing dotted along those visible bits.
She placed the book carefully into the duffel, rushing from the library and back to the front hall, opening and closing the front door, the guard raising his eyebrows at her.
Miss Kagome?
I need a car, she whispered.
The guard called for a car, having to wake the only soul in the garage before her little blue bug appeared out front, the driver also giving her an odd look.
She looked back at the house, knowing full well that every second she waited was giving Sesshoumaru the advantage, and a small part of her tried to keep her there, on the door step, because that part wanted to give him the advantage; regardless of the punishment, part of her was praying that he would find her, no matter how hard she tried; because then, at least, she had given it her all, and she had tried.
Thank you, she mumbled softly, tossing her duffel to the passenger seat as she slid into hers, gripping the steering wheel tightly.
Miss Kagome, would you like to leave a message of any kind for Masaharu-sama?
Tears blurred her vision, and she wiped them away quickly, trying to focus on the drive ahead of her.
T- tell him I, I love him, tell him that, and tell him Im sorry The last bit came out strangled in a sob she couldnt stop.
Without waiting for an answer, she shattered her own heart into impossibly small pieces as she drove off into the night.
--