InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ LOVE POISON ❯ Powerful Weakness ( Chapter 17 )

DISCLAIMER: I own nothin'. Don't sue.

 

Hope you haven't given up on me! Here's the next chapter, hope I don't dissapoint! And I HOPE you REVIEW *hint hint* *nudge nudge*

My endless gratitude and ooki hugs to my marvelous talented kawaii wonderful and beyond cool beta and the best KS EVAR Trusuprise! Her support and encouraging words (not to mention ego boosts lol) mean more to me than I could Ever say! She totally rocks! I love you, girl!

Thanks, love, and an endless supply of ramen to my awesome friend Lizashu for bearing with me and being her wonderful, sweet self. I love ya!

Huge thanks to Aislynn for being so damn cute and always being here, right from the start, and on another note, giving This Youkai Musashi such great reviews!

And as always, all my love to the great Scherezade!

 

On with the story!

 

 

 

CHAPTER 17: POWERFUL WEAKNESS

 

 

"Keh."

 

The inu-hanyou's self-hatred and grief that had taken over him the moment Kagome had asked him to stay away from him, and the unshakeable awareness that no matter how hard he tried he didn't deserve the young miko, had slowly but surely turned into white hot annoyance and bitterness.

 

Those feelings he was more comfortable with; that he could deal with, that was something he was accustomed to. It was those feeling that served him the purpose of defeating his foes, or in this case, his doubts and insecurities, instead of defeating him.

 

It was easier to be mad with Kagome than to feel - rejected by her. Yes, she had rejected him. The little bitch had rejected him!

 

She was his, dammit! His bitch, his...his future mate! It didn't matter. Whatever adjetive he chose to use in his head to describe her was irrelevant.

 

'Koishii...' He thought, and shook his head. He had let that term of endearment slip as he'd stared up at Kagome's flushed, lovely heart-shaped face from between her legs, her succulent taste and unmistakable scent making his senses soar, his mouth, chin and nose slick with her release...and he was not taking that back.

 

Bitch, wench, baka, mate...koishii.

 

Bottom line was, Kagome belonged to him. She must know it, and despite this, she'd basically ordered him to stay away from her!

 

Inuyasha had obediently and sadly walked away from Kagome, giving her the time she had asked him for, with that particularly heart-broken, intense look she'd 'blessed' him with that he simply couldn't refuse. Fuck, there was nothing he would refuse the woman.

 

Rejected.

 

Inuyasha was somehow shocked that his inner youkai hadn't chosen this particular, vulnerable moment to mock him and call him a spineless, worthless half-breed who couldn't even stand up to his bitch. Perhaps his small triumph over his youkai blood earlier had not been as small as he'd initially believed...

 

Inuyasha sat on the grassy earth with his back against the Bone Eater's Well, Tetsusaiga held protectively against his chest, legs crossed indian-style, as he compulsively moved his knee in a way that always annoyed Kagome to no end. It was evident proof that he was anxious, nervous, or upset. Probably all three things rolled into one.

 

Since the inu-hanyou was thankfully not hearing any voices in his head for the time being, he decided to stop thinking, lest his head explode, and voice his thoughts instead. He'd thought he needed time to ponder himself, but now he realized that what he needed was time to vent his frustration.

 

If it wasn't for his useless, weak human blood that had left room for his bloodthirsty, lustful, primal youkai side to break free, Inuyasha would have taken Kagome back there in her time, right on her pink, frighteningly girly bed, not giving a flying fuck if the whole household awoke. Who said he wasn't ready? He'd been ready for her ever since...since...

 

"Always. I've always been waiting for her. Stupid bitch." He muttered to the morning air, his knee still moving non-stop, ears flattening against his skull.

But that was a contradiction now wasn't it? He'd admitted to Kagome himself that he wasn't ready. He knew she wasn't, she'd said as much, although...

 

Ready. Now. Bitch smells ready!

 

That bastard that was his inner youkai had certainly been fucking ready earlier that morning. As for the hanyou...hell, Inuyasha couldn't remember a time when he hadn't wanted Kagome. But...that animal that was his youkai side was...just horny, Inuyasha told himself.

 

The hanyou couldn't deny he desired the young miko with every fiber of his being, but Kagome was the type of girl who'd want her first time to be special and...stuff.

And he would make it special for her, dammit, because Kagome deserved the best. If he wasn't worthy of her, he'd just have to try harder to deserve this beautiful, caring girl. Also, he promised himself again he'd rather die than allow that bastard lay a single claw on his Kagome.

 

Inuyasha shifted and scowled. But...he wanted her too, he wanted her now. Had he just agreed to what his inner youkai demanded of him?

Hell, no. He'd wait for Kagome. He'd waited two fucking years, he'd fallen in love with her somewhere along the way...a little longer wouldn't hurt...

 

But currently, Inuyasha was upset enough not to give a shit about what was right or wrong. He had been rejected by his bitch, and even worse, he had been sat. Three fucking times. So okay, he deserved the first one but...he growled dangerously.

 

"I need to think, Inuyasha." He said in his best imitation of Kagome, which in his opinion was quite good, but according to Kaede-baba didn't sound like her at all. "What's my name, Inuyasha? Stay, Inuyasha." He went on mockingly. "Keh. Doesn't she know...doesn't she know that I..." He sighed, his anger dissipating as he slowly came to the realization that who he was actually upset with was himself; the reason being mainly that he had almost blurted out to Kagome that he loved her. But - she had to know, right? Was there any reason at all to say it out loud? He had never spoken those words to anyone.

 

No...that wasn't true, he corrected himself silently. He'd said those words out loud over sixty years ago...the night his Mother had passed away and he'd been but a five-year-old pup.

Inuyasha remembered her blissful smile, as she tenderly stroked his cheek with shaking, white fingers, saying she loved him too, that he had to be strong from now on...and then...then she had simply ceased to exist.

Inuyasha hadn't wept, but he had silently sworn to himself never to speak those words again. Never to love again. He had failed miserably, and broken his own promise to himself...for he loved Kagome more than life itself.

 

True, he had cared for Kikyou, but with Kagome...it was entirely different. What he felt for Kagome was...beautifully frightening to him. It was new, it left him powerless, yet he wouldn't change this overwhelming feeling for anything in the world.

Kagome had become his world. And somehow, he didn't perceive this as a weakness, even if it had felt that way at first...but with time he'd understood it was quite the contrary. It made him feel defenseless at times, for although his love for her was not a weakness, Kagome certainly was his weakness. And as contradictory as it seemed, Kagome was also his strength.

 

So this was love. It made you weak and strong. It made absolutely no sense, but it made perfect sense too...

 

Inuyasha sighed in annoyance at his own thoughts and rolled his eyes. Yet...when Kagome was with him...Inuyasha felt like the most powerful being on the face of the earth. He could move mountains, win any battle, do anything, anything at all...just giving in to this feeling - why not call it what it truly was? - yes, to give in to his love for her, his need to protect her...to fight for her, along side with her.

 

He wouldn't deny that he cherished the fact that he now lived not only for himself, but for Kagome as well. At least, he wouldn't deny it to himself...although anyone else who asked or dared suggest anything remotely like it would probably get a 'keh' from him.

 

But the real reason for him being upset now was because although Kagome trusted him, the wench didn't seem to trust in his feelings for her. The stupid girl didn't understand how much Inuyasha needed her, even though he had told her this over and over again.

He'd said he cared for her! Wasn't that enough? He'd shown her! She doubted him because...she still believed he was comparing her to Kikyou.

 

Inuyasha mentally berated himself for bringing up the purifying issue earlier. Shit, of course he was to blame for her insecurity. If he had dissipated Kagome's most secret fears before, when he had bared his soul to her as much as he'd allowed himself to...he had just brought them back with a vengeance by stating that Kikyou could, and had in fact purified him, so why the hell couldn't she do the same.

 

'Baka, baka, baka...' Inuyasha cursed himself, growling low in his throat. Sometimes, he was his worst enemy.

 

The thoughtless words had rolled off his tongue before his brain had time to process them, since Inuyasha had a habit of having his feet for breakfast, lunch and dinner...and he had wanted to kick himself the second the words had left his lips.

 

Kagome had left him an hour ago because she needed 'time to think', but to Inuyasha, it seemed like ages, every minute that passed made him more and more restless, and he was not at all aware that he had been growling since she had told him to 'stay'.

He couldn't bear to be apart from Kagome, especially not since they had gotten so...close.

 

"Keh." He muttered again, folding his arms across his chest. At least his knee had stopped its relentless movement. Inuyasha sighed. "One of me. Yeah, right. Which one?" He wondered out loud. "The pathetic human she obviously wants, the youkai she almost gave in to...or...me?"

 

Kagome's words from so long ago echoed in his ears.

 

I love you as a hanyou, Inuyasha.

 

He hmmph'ed as his golden eyes shut briefly. "How lame." He muttered, and he vaguely recalled those had been his exact words back then. Yet Kagome's statement had not been 'lame' at all. Since then, he had clung to her words as though his life depended on it. He heard her sweet voice in his head time and again...and he repeated to himself over and over when he felt there was no hope, when he missed her so much he couldn't breathe...when his defenses were low or he was drowning in self-hatred...it had become his mantra...'she loves me as I am. She loves me as I am. She loves me as a hanyou...' not quite believing it himself, but completely and blindly believing in her. Kagome couldn't lie worth a damn, after all...

 

"Shit." He hissed. Inuyasha loathed thinking. It usually led him no where. If only he could tear through his own thoughts as if they were enemies, slash them into pieces with his claws, or blast them into nothingness with his sword, then he would have nothing to worry about.

It certainly would save him a lot of pain. Except once he started thinking, he couldn't stop. He thought about himself, about the past...the things he'd done and said...each and every single time he'd hurt his Kagome. All the wrongs that couldn't be made right...the look of hatred in Kikyou's icy eyes fifty years ago, as he kept reliving the nightmare of her arrow flying straight to his heart, as if in slow motion...the Shikon no Tama slipping from his fingers...landing soundlessly on the ground...and then...then there was...nothing.

Kagome's lost, pained expression, her devastated look when she had seen him with Kikyou...

 

But all that was in the past, wasn't it? Kagome knew he had chosen her, and Inuyasha himself had known it before her. The only thing he regretted now was not telling her sooner...and his thoughts dragged him back, kicking and squirming, to that fateful morning, to the spot where Kikyou had stood before his naked, shivering form...her eyes cold, her voice commanding and calm.

 

Come out, Inuyasha. Let me look at you...

 

The wheels in his head would not stop...He scowled and cursed inwardly, as he desperately clung to the image forever imprinted in his mind, not of the dead miko Kikyou, but of Kagome. Of Kagome's beautiful, flushed face as she climaxed, Kagome's sweet, erotic moans, the heavenly sensation of her tight, succulent little sex squeezing his fingers the previous night, trying to take as much of them into her as she could; her warm mouth suckling him deeper into her wet cavern, her tongue, lips and throat working him...and back in her time, her intoxicating juices flowing into his welcoming mouth, her thighs squeezing his head tightly as he flickered the tip of his tongue over her pulsing, swollen clit, only to enter her wet depths again, his eager tongue becoming his throbbing cock as it pulled in and out of her with increasing speed. Kagome's soothing and maddening scent, her comforting aura...

 

Damn the tempting little bitch, he was hard as a rock now. At least now his little head could do the thinking for his big head...

A small, bitter laugh escaped his lips. 'Great. Just fucking great, baka.' He thought, suddenly finding it hard to breathe.

 

He frantically tried to think of the most disgusting thing that came to mind. An image of Jaken in one of those things Kagome called a 'bikini' that she somehow thought was required for swimming popped into his head and he shuddered, feeling himself go limp. Well, at least it was what he'd been aiming for...

"Now that was fucking disturbing." He muttered and shuddered visibly again.

 

Thankfully, the disgusting mental image dissipated, but to his dispair, he was left again with his unwelcomed thoughts. Inuyasha sighed defeatedly as he shut his golden eyes. He searched for Kagome's voice in his mind and found what he was looking for.

 

I love you as a hanyou, Inuyasha...

...There's only one of you.

 

However, this last statement that was so apparently obvious to Kagome was not what he'd been searching for. He heard it quite clearly, and now he couldn't stop her voice from repeating these words that made absolutely no sense to the inu-hanyou.

Inuyasha growled loudly at nothing and no one in particular, his mind running wild again. He was confused, and he hated being confused almost as much as he loathed feeling sorry for himself.

 

'Who am I?' Inuyasha thought, unknowingly echoing the very same question Kagome had asked herself moments before. 'Who does Kagome want me to be?'

 

Kikyou had wanted him to be human. Kagome...Kagome just wanted him to be...

 

"What?" He whispered out loud. And the answer was crystal clear to him, and yet it confused him further. "Inuyasha." He answered his own question out loud. "That's what she wants me to be, who she wants me to be. Then...why is it so fucking hard to be - to be me? It should be easy, right? Everyone can do it. It takes no effort, no thinking...just to be...yourself..."

 

Except for Inuyasha's case. Ever since his trespass with Kikyou at the stream's edge, it took an enormous amount of will power and control to simply be himself. Holding back his youkai blood had become harder as time passed, it screamed for blood before...but he had always relied on Tetsusaiga or on his Kagome to bring him back...but now...now it was nearly impossible to hold the bastard back.

 

Kagome couldn't help him anymore. Inuyasha didn't know for sure if Tetsusaiga would work again. He hadn't even been certain if it would work earlier, back in the old hag's hut. Except it had been his last resort. He'd felt like a blind man in an alien body, reaching out for the first thing that could keep him from falling.

 

"Dammit, she has to do it! She has to purify my ass if I go berseker on her again! There's no other way! What the hell is she planning to do anyway? Sing a fucking song to soothe the beast?" Inuyasha growled in frustration, feeling more helpless than he had ever felt in his entire life. He was also aware that he had admitted to Kagome earlier, for the first time ever, that he was...scared. He hated himself now for confessing this to her.

 

Weak. Weak weak weak.

 

"Screw this." He said through gritted teeth, gripping Tetsusaiga tightly and rising to his full height.

 

Inuyasha had no clue how much time had passed, but to him it felt like a short eternity, and he was going to get his bitch back. She'd probably had enough time to 'think' by now.

 

After all, there was only so much thinking a person could stand.

 

 

_____________________

 

 

Sesshomaru silently waited for the ancient magnolia tree to continue. He had sent Rin away to pick some flowers, knowing this made the child happy.

When she had first begun presenting him with flowers, Sesshoumaru casually tossed them away when she wasn't looking, but he had abruptly stopped that ever since Rin had seen him do it once.

The human child had not burst into tears as he'd expected though, but the heart broken look on her always cheerful little face had actually made Sesshoumaru feel guilty for the first time in his long life.

So now he kept the flowers tucked away in his armor until they died, and Rin always made sure he had fresh flowers. He merely accepted them with a slight nod of his head, and made sure the child saw him tuck them inside his armor.

 

Jaken had been horrified when he'd first witnessed the unlikely sight of his Lord carefully hiding the wild flowers Rin had presented him with inside his armor, but a single icy look from Sesshoumaru had unsettled the toad youkai, and he had promptly shut his beak, lest he attracted flies, as Sesshoumaru had so dryly put it. Jaken had discovered his Lord had recently developed an extremely dry, disturbing sense of humor, and it upset him almost as much as Sesshoumaru smiling did. So Jaken had never questioned Sesshoumaru whenever Rin brought him flowers, or whatever souvenir she came across and considered a worthy gift for the Lord of the Western Lands.

 

Before sending his human protegee and servant away, much to the toad youkai's dismay, Sesshoumaru had addressed the child softly, not even turning around, "Rin. Keep Jaken out trouble."

To which Rin had answered with an overly enthusiastic, "Yes, Sesshoumaru-sama!" and had abandoned the sight of her Lord and the ancient tree, waving at him happily from the dragon youkai's back.

 

Until Ah-Un's echoing steps had vanished from the taiyoukai's sensitive ears, neither tree nor demon spoke a single word, although the smile Bokuseno was gracing Sesshoumaru with was not

of the Western Lord's liking. It was almost...mocking. But also quite kind. Sesshoumaru resented it either way.

 

Bokuseno had seen the way Sesshoumaru's golden eyes had softened for a mere second while addressing the little girl, even though nor child or toad youkai were able to see it and probably wouldn't have noticed anyway, and Sesshoumaru was well aware of this fact and wordlessly dared the old tree to comment on this with a lethal glare, his pupils contracting.

 

Surprisingly enough, Bokuseno had quietly chuckled, saying nothing more than a simple sentence that Sesshoumaru had ignored with a particularly deadly look that would have made any youkai throw themselves at his feet and beg for their lives.

 

"You have changed, Sesshoumaru."

 

Yes, Sesshoumaru had changed. A part of him resented Rin for it, yet the human whelp made him smile inwardly in spite of himself; she soothed his youki for reasons he could not understand, and he had become...accustomed...to having her around.

 

Rin was all sunshine and happy smiles and glowing eyes shining with adoration just for him, her scent was fresh and she did not reek like other humans.

No, Sesshoumaru told himself he was not biased. But he would not deny to himself that the child had slowly and persistently made her way into his heart, and at some point since she had been resurrected by Tenseiga and had started to follow him around, he had simply 'adopted' her. In a way, she had become his responsability the moment he had brought her back to life.

 

Sesshoumaru had never protected anyone in his entire life before...but now he did, and this brought a sense of both power and weakness that confused and moved him deeply at the same time. Maybe...just maybe, he was beginning to understand his Father.

 

Was this what his Father had been refering to when he had asked Sesshoumaru the night he had died if there was nothing he wished to protect?

 

Perhaps this particular kind of 'weakness' was not such a bad thing, after all. Was this the wisdom that came with age? He didn't know and frankly, he couldn't care less. However, Sesshoumaru was not oblivious to the fact that he had, indeed, changed.

 

He now protected Rin, and in return, she'd become his secret, inner smile. Inuyasha had threatened what was his, and for this he would punish the bastard hanyou. He'd make him wish he was dead. But he needed answers first.

Sesshoumaru was not one to rush into things, and he had already warned his brother. The Western Lord disliked to repeat himself.

 

Yes, he had changed. Sesshoumaru had learned from an early age to mask his emotions, and he'd gotten so good at it that he was often unaware of the fact that he actually hid his feelings even from himself.

 

Even at a young age, Sesshoumaru had never considered himself a pup, he had certainly never felt like one. He'd always been the great Taiyoukai's son, the one who would one day take his Father's place as ruler of the Western Lands. He had been raised to fulfill this task, he had been taught to be a ruthless, cold blooded warrior and a knowledgeable Lord in every sense of the word. Although his Father had always insisted he hide his true feelings outside of youkai politics or wars, Sesshoumaru could not bear to show weakness of any kind, not even at an early age.

 

He'd turned out to be quite a remarkable ruler, respected and feared by youkai and humans alike, and since his Father's death, he'd ruled the Western Lands with a firm yet fairly responsible hand. The humans living in his kingdom were not starving, the armies that dared set foot on his lands were promptly disposed of with one swing of Toukijin.

 

His people were safe as long as the rules were followed. And follow them they did. Those who rebelled against his laws, youkai or humans, became severed heads stuck to poles, reminding anyone that their ruler did not tolerate disobedience.

 

His icy, golden stare alone was enough to make any youkai that offended him or was rude to him in any way to get down on their knees and beg for their petty lives. Either that, or flee in terror never to return to his territory.

 

To his annoyance, Inuyasha was the only one who did not even flinch under Sesshoumaru's menacing glare. And recently and unexpectedly, another being had come into the picture that actually had the guts to keep eye contact with him for more than ten seconds without running for

the hills or begging for forgivance.

 

Sesshoumaru's thoughts drifted to this particular, intriguing youkai...

The Wind Sorceress, of course. Kagura and her penetrating crimson eyes, her pouty bloodred lips and sensual demeanor, her incredible boldness, sharp tongue and rebellious attitude...and yet this woman Sesshoumaru knew stood tall and was stronger than any female youkai he had encountered could not bring herself to stand up to the one despicable hanyou that had enslaved her. She feared for her life, but she did not fear Sesshoumaru. He, who was the very embodiment of fear and represented death itself to all who dared oppose him or even behave improperly in his presence, was not a death threat to Kagura at all.

She had actually insulted him, yelled at him, called him a coward, threatened his manhood, and even cursed him.

 

Sesshoumaru had been surprised by his own response to this...he had been...well, quite amused by her attitude. She was a contradiction...a beautiful challenge. She had spiked his curiosity. He had never met anyone who possessed such passion and fire within them...yet was literally heartless.

Kagura was anything but cold, she was hot headed and her blood was constantly on fire, and she was certainly overly confident.

She was angry all the time, and that Kagura seemed to have learned to live with, but boredom was something she could stand as much as Sesshoumaru could tolerate insolence. Needless to say, this wasn't much.

 

Kagura lacked patience and she was reckless, but that only made her a more passionate, intriguing creature in Sesshoumaru's eyes. She feared for her life and clung to it desperately, but at the same time seemed to tempt fate with every breath she took.

 

The Western Lord blinked and pushed any thoughts of the irritating woman away. This was certainly not the time to think about the impulsive, beautiful wind witch who secretly visited him during her 'free' nights...who dared touch him with invisible hands.

It was certainly not the time to think about how much he secretly enjoyed her brief visits...her whispered caresses, her youki reaching out to his...hesitantly at first, then becoming more daring with time.

 

No. Sesshoumaru didn't have time for such nonsense, he didn't want to ponder on feelings he could not control or comprehend, lest they make himself an easy target to his enemies. He already had one weakness, he certainly did not need another one.

 

The Western Lord had taken many youkai women, but only during mating season. And once they served their purpose, he simply disposed of them, a used body.

The unsettling fact that he desired this particular, infuriating woman, and that she was not in heat and calling him to her as many of the inu-youkai females of his species would...well, Sesshoumaru didn't want to admit to himself that he knew all to well the reason for this.

 

But he had more pressing matters to attend to. Hunting down Naraku was one of them. He also had his lands to patrol, and he had been neglecting his duties as the Western Lord. He had his reputation to keep, after all.

When the time came to produce an heir, he would pick the strongest bitch in the land for this purpose, and once she had given birth to his pup, he would simply kill her.

 

Sesshoumaru had never been one to give in to carnal desires unless his insticts demanded it of him, yet his body and youki responded to Kagura in ways that he was not familiar with, and this annoyed him to no end. He'd never felt lust before...just the need to rut. He'd sworn to himself that he would never mark a mate and make the same fatal mistake that had led his Father to an early grave.

 

The past called out to him, as much as he loathed remembering. How his Father had possessed a good natured laugh that could make the ground shake, and eyes that could not only glare menacingly and make the enemy cower in fear, but also glow with amusement and good humor. His Father had always been unpredictable, and his need to protect and help lower beings - humans, Sesshoumaru thought now with a scowl, holding back a growl - had earned him unexpected respect for reasons Sesshoumaru couldn't even begin to understand but couldn't help but compare to his hanyou brother.

 

He hated them both for it. His Father and half brother shared a strength that came from within, not from training or experience...and he, Sesshoumaru, did not wish to achieve that kind of strength. As far as the Western Lord was concernd, it was a facade, it was thoughtless and careless, and it only brought pain and death with it. His Father had suffered an honorless death that Sesshoumaru would never forgive Inuyasha nor his human mother for, that little human whore who had captured his Father's heart and given him nothing but an unworthy demise.

 

However, this useless urge to protect the weak had not kept his Father from being acknowledged as the most powerful and feared youkai in the Musashi domains.

But - it had also killed the one being Sesshoumaru had looked up to, the one being he'd thought was truly immortal.

 

'Humans...why protect them, why love them?'

 

And yet...there was Rin. Rin who had been threatened by his useless hanyou brother gone berseker. Rin, whom he protected. Rin, who was his human.

 

Inuyasha's demon blood had awakened again, except this time...it was different. His brother's life had not been in danger recently, and yet the scent of his blood had changed more than once in such a short time, and Sesshoumaru needed answers, and he would have them today.

 

Bokuseno had already informed him earlier about what had happened between Inuyasha and his human bitch, though Sesshoumaru still did not understand why his brother's youkai blood was attempting to take control when the fool's life was not threatened.

He had seen Tetsusaiga hanging from Inuyasha's hip until the berseker full youkai his brother had transformed into had tossed it away as though it weighed on him. Sesshoumaru himself had retrieved the sword that rejected him and shoved it roughly into Inuyasha's hand.

 

Tetsusaiga's barrier had denied him, his Father's Fang had burnt his palm and although his skin was completely healed now, his one hand tingled, and his blood boiled with rage that was directed not at his brother, but at his Father.

He now understood why Tetsusaiga was left to the hanyou...but it didn't make the pain of his Father's rejection go away, and Sesshoumaru refused to acknowledge or feel pain of any kind. The itching in his hand was a reminder of this unbearable pain that was not physical at all, and Sesshoumaru would take this bitter, secret grief with him to his grave.

 

Currently, Bokuseno's aged, weather worn face contemplated the Western Lord thoughtfully.

"I know the question you would ask and the answer is quite simple."

 

Sesshomaru frowned, not wanting the ancient tree to know that he was actually concerned for his younger half brother, yet he allowed Bokuseno to continue.

 

"Inuyasha's human blood has been weakened." He said simply, and Sesshoumaru thought that if trees could shrug, Bokuseno would be doing so right now. Still, the inu-youkai remained silent.

 

"How, you wonder?" The ancient tree went on. "The undead miko is the reason."

 

Sesshoumaru's golden eyes hardened, but not a word left his lips. Bokuseno was obviously not expecting a reply from Sesshoumaru, for he continued.

 

"She is no longer the woman she used to be, although her desires remain the same, if not stronger. She feels a false freedom in her new form, but her body is alien to her, and her mind is blurred by jealousy and longing. She has tried to prove herself as a woman, and has failed. She does not know this has weakened Inuyasha's human blood, thus making his youkai blood stronger. Inuyasha is confused. He was under a spell...a feeble one, but a potentially dangerous spell. One that the creature who was the death of the resurrected miko fifty years ago was testing out on your unsuspecting brother. The spell was not strong enough, but unexpectedly, it served its purpose."

 

"Naraku." Sesshoumaru muttered dryly, wrath making his blood boil, yet his face did not show the slightest change at the mention of the abominable hanyou.

 

"Indeed. He has summoned the undead miko, and she has gone to him. She craves something that her dead body will not allow her to obtain. She wants Inuyasha, and she has willingly walked into Naraku's trap. He has figured out a way to make the spell stronger, and the undead priestess will become his vessel. She will not stop at anything to get her way. Your brother's young miko...his strength shall we say, and Inuyasha himself, are in great danger. Inuyasha's inner youkai is developing a personality of its own. This will not swallow Inuyasha's soul, for he is not after blood this time... his inner demon knows who he is now, yet he does not acknowledge the fact that he is hanyou. As for Inuyasha himself... he fears for his miko. Inuyasha has reached maturity, as you well know, for fifty years have passed unnoticed by Inuyasha, and they have not brought experience or wisdom to him. True, he has matured in more ways than one within the last two years, but he has remained the same mental age as the day he was sealed...yet his body needs to take a mate. Unlike you, Sesshoumaru-sama, your brother refuses to just take anyone. His human heart bleeds for his chosen one. And both his youkai and human blood have recognized her. His blood is battling for dominance, and I fear he might lose this battle. If Naraku's spell is completed, not even I can tell how Inuyasha will react."

 

The ancient tree youkai scowled slightly, a sight that was not seen by many. Bokuseno was concerned, and this did not make Sesshoumaru feel at ease, yet he remained calm and composed when he spoke next, choosing his words carefully and speaking in a low voice.

 

"This...chosen you speak of. It is not the dead miko." Sesshoumaru said, arching a delicate eyebrow. It was, most definetely, not a question.

 

Bokuseno half smiled, his scowl vanishing from his wrinkled face. "Certainly not. She has never been his chosen one. Even when your brother was too young to mate. Fifty years have went by and yet for Inuyasha, not a day had passed since he was sealed to the Sacred Tree by her enchanted arrow. As an orphaned hanyou, he knows nothing of inu-youkai ways. However, his inner demon knows... instictively. Inuyasha does not wish to harm his future mate. He fears his youkai side will hurt the girl. Inuyasha will not accept that his inner demon is also him, therefore, he is struggling with himself. Whichever side wins, Inuyasha will lose either way - if he does not accept his nature he will not understand that there is no such battle. He is hanyou. It is all in his head. His blood is both human and youkai, but he does not see it this way. His miko can not help him control his inner youkai this time. She will only strengthen it. Inuyasha's will however is strong when she is around. But if she is gone..."

 

Sesshoumaru remembered that Inuyasha had believed that his companions were hiding the miko from him when he had confronted his brother in his full youkai form as he was mindlessly trashing the village he had once claimed to protect, yet the houshi had informed Sesshoumaru that Inuyasha himself had sent the young girl away back to her 'country'. Now it all made sense.

 

"If she is gone, Inuyasha will lose his mind." Bokuseno finished, voicing Sesshoumaru's thoughts.

 

"How can this be helped?" Sesshoumaru asked in a low voice.

 

"Myouga has already spoken with Inuyasha, but his words fell on deaf ears, as is to be expected from your brother. Inuyasha refuses to believe this is the only way. And he does not wish to do this merely for the sake of his blood. Do you not know, Sesshoumaru-sama?"

 

"He must take his bitch and mark her." Sesshoumaru answered automatically.

 

"Yes. But he does not consider himself worthy of his chosen."

 

Sesshoumaru snorted, but Bokuseno ignored the taiyoukai and continued.

"The dead miko...she has other plans. However, Inuyasha knows where his loyalty lies. Yet Naraku is willing to take the risk and force your brother into marking a mate...for he expects a repeat of what happened fifty years ago. What he is dismissing is the fact that Inuyasha has changed, he has learned to trust, and the young girl is stronger that Naraku gives her credit for."

 

"And why should This Sesshoumaru care?" The Western Lord replied coldly, cutting Bokuseno off.

 

"Why are you here, Sesshoumaru-sama?" Bokuseno answered smartly.

 

"Inuyasha has threatened what is mine. I want this to cease." Was Sesshoumaru's emotionless response, golden eyes hardening, his pupils contracting again.

 

"Ah. I see. The child you have adopted as your own. The human child." Bokuseno smiled. "She has changed you, very much in the manner the young miko has changed your brother. Yet neither had any intention to do so. Funny, really...how Fate grants us wishes we did not even know we were wishing for."

 

Sesshoumaru lifted his chin slightly, his expression bored. "Ridiculous." He stated.

 

Bokuseno merely smiled. "Your child has returned."

 

Rin had never been out of Sesshoumaru's hearing range, and he could smell her scent from miles away, and of course, Bokuseno already knew this.

 

The Western Lord did not bother to turn around as the child came running happily towards him, Jaken's webbed feet slapped on the ground as he pulled at Ah-Un's reins and tried to keep up with the young girl.

 

Sesshoumaru did not look down at Rin either, but merely opened his hand and held it out to her wordlessly.

"Rin. Let us go." He said coldly.

"Rin brought Sesshoumaru-sama some flowers! And Rin also kept Jaken-sama out of trouble!" The child informed her Lord cheerfully.

 

"Hey!" Jaken said irritably from where he had stopped to catch his breath, Ah-Un by his side.

 

"Goodbye, Bokuseno-sama!" Rin bowed politely to the ancient tree, as Bokuseno's smile widened.

 

"Farewell, little one."

 

Rin gave him a brilliant smile and she clasped the hand Sesshoumaru had silently offered her. She held a bouquet of wild flowers in her left hand and lifted them for Sesshoumaru's inspection, an almost hopeful look in her big, brown eyes.

 

Bokuseno's amused smile never left his lips, since he had obviously not missed the light squeeze Sesshoumaru's large, delicate hand that completely covered hers gave the child, nor the softening of the inu-youkai's golden eyes for a fraction of a second as he regarded the freshly picked flowers and seemed to approve of them with a slight nod of his head. Rin beamed up at her Lord.

 

Sesshoumaru looked up and glared at the tree, golden eyes so cold they might as well have been carved out of precious stones instead of being the open windows to the soul they had been a brief second earlier.

 

"Ridiculous." He half muttered, half growled at his Father's old friend, and without another word he turned and walked calmly to the remaining members of his 'pack'.

 

He lifted Rin up effortlessly and sat her on Ah-Un's back. She took the reins and handed him the flowers. Sesshoumaru looked at them for a moment, then hurriedly tucked them inside his armor. Rin's bright, adoring smile could have chased the clouds away at that moment.

 

'Inuyasha must claim his bitch to return to his senses. Taking the miko as his mate will undoubtedly make him stronger. Yet Naraku wants him to do so, is in fact forcing him to mark her. He underestimates the girl, and my brother as well. That is one mistake I made myself and I shall not repeat. She is a powerful miko, and strong willed. For some reason this remarkable human loves my worthless, foolish brother. We shall not have time to find out if Naraku will succeed in his plan. Because This Sesshoumaru will slay him first. Inuyasha is mine to kill. When the time comes.'

 

No, Sesshomaru shook his head. He had fallen back into old instincts that he, almost regretfully, no longer believed in.

Killing a pathetic, weak hanyou was no longer in Sesshoumaru's plans. Long ago, the Western Lord had grudgingly admitted to himself that his brother had the potential of becoming stronger than a full inu-youkai.

 

After all, he was his Father's son, much to Sesshoumaru's dislike, but the underlying power that Inuyasha posessed was too great for even himself to ignore. It would be foolish for him to kill Inuyasha now. With the inu-hanyou's power, Inuyasha had the potential of becoming two things to the Western Lord. Either Inuyasha may become a threat to his position, or he may become so strong an ally should he ever need assistance patroling the Western Lands, should he ever have a need to leave his territory for an extended amount of time.

 

Not that he would willingly ask Inuyasha for help, but why rid himself of so strong a power if he might be able to use it to his advantage some day? But first...first Inuyasha had to prove himself to his Lord.

 

If his chosen was taken from him, Inuyasha would become but an empty shell of himself, for the Kagome girl had become his brother's strength. When the human miko was nearby, Inuyasha possessed a strength that Sesshoumaru had never imagined his half-breed brother was capable of. Without her, he would be powerless and most likely welcome death, and not even put up a fight.

 

Sesshoumaru itched for a good battle. He had not had an opponent that presented a challenge to him in centuries. He was biding his time, even, for the past year, 'helping' the inu-hanyou realize his potential and unleash his inner strength.

 

Their encounters were child's play for the taiyoukai. All he did was push his brother back and urge him to fight, often throwing more insults at him than deadly blows. And fight back he did. When Sesshoumaru had threatened what was his...Inuyasha had proven his worth. The inu-youkai's missing arm was proof of that.

Nevertheless, if Sesshoumaru had desired so, Inuyasha would have been dead a long time ago.

 

Currently, the inu-hanyou was far from being a worthy opponent for the Western Lord. So Sesshoumaru would wait. Could his brother not hold up to his newfound expectations of him, he would kill Inuyasha when Inuyasha was truly ready to take him on.

 

And as long as Sesshoumaru lived, he would not allow anyone to dispose of his worthless brother other than himself.

 

When the inu-hanyou grew up, he would kill him. Until then, Sesshoumaru had all the time in the world.

 

 

TBC

 

 

AN: Thanks so much to all of you who reviewed and especially to those who keep reviewing! I'm so grateful to you and luv ya all! *group hug* I haven't been getting reviews though, and I'm sad! *pout*

 

Btw, LP has been nominated again by the IY Fan Fiction Guild Awards, this time for best Inu/Kag Romance and Best Serial Fic. Me happy! But...but...I need reviews to keep me alive! COME ON YOU GUYS!!!

I'm really happy with the way this ch turned out! I hope you liked it! Let me know!

 

Coming next... *drumroll* Naraku's spell is finally completed, but it does not quite turn out as he'd expected...and what does Kagura have to do with Kikyou's new body?

Wanna find out? Then REVIEW DAMMIT! Ahem...please review? *batts eyelashes*

 

Until next chapter, love ramen and pocky to you all!

YM