InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Gamble ❯ Chapter Six ( Chapter 6 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

A/n: Boo for horribly long delays! Yay for updates finally!

AllieCoolGirl: You are a cool girl for reading my story. Kudos >>! And definitely, thank you for reading so many of them :D. I'm happy you enjoy them all!!

Hollywood1: Unfortunately, soon, this story was coming to an end. I had planned to make it originally seven chapters, and it looks like it shall be that way ;). But I am happy you liked it.

Luna-


I think I gave her the stupidest grin ever. In fact, I'm sure of it.

How couldn't I?

Not when the damn girl was looking so shy, deep blush and all.

She gave me the whole nine yards, and I was a big enough dick to appreciate that precious face and make her wait for an answer.

Bad habit of mine I still have to this day.

She's too fucking adorable.

I hate it.

...In all the right ways, of course.

'Sure. I guess it wouldn't put me out too much.'

I know that wasn't the most romantic of answers... but she still smiled at what she knew was a 'hell yes!' from me.

There was no way I would have passed up an opportunity to make up with her... not ever.

Not even when I was at my peak of all assholiness.

'...when, actually?' I asked.

She averted her eyes, that small smile growing ever a bit wider. That pink blush lightening...

Damn, I wanted to kiss those sweet lips...

'...n-now?... If it's not too much trouble?'

I was a bit surprised.

She sure didn't wait around.

I thought she may have needed some time to prepare.

...nope, not my Kagome.

Rush head first into what may be a suckie afternoon from hell.

And it took her all that courage to ask me, too.

'...sure... I guess.'

I think she took that a bit dejected, because right after she rushed to make amends for nothing.

'I'll pay!'

I sputtered, damn near spitting on the poor girl in shock.

She had never offered before...

I really, really had caused a lot of damage...

Reparable?

I hoped so.

'Damnit, wench! I maybe an asshole, but I'm still a man!' I snapped at her, thoroughly embarrassed she had even thought to ask.

She closed her eyes tightly under the shade of my anger, and she squeaked, 'Sorry!'

Any irritation I had died at that.

I remember being gruff to hide my regret at rough treating her... had it really become such habit?

By then, I knew it had.

'It's fine... let's go.'

I began to walk, and she followed behind me, rather than by my side... causing the irritation I had before to quickly revive. I felt too nervous, and it was causing me to be moody at every little thing she did.

But, right then it was understandable as I didn't even know where I was going.

Stopping, she ran into my back.

'Where are we going, anyway?'

Silence answered me for a moment.

Then, she muttered, 'I... don't know...'

I whirled around, huffing angrily, 'You ask me and then you don't know where we're going?'

'Sorry!'

'Stop apologizing!'

'Sorry!'

'...I said stop it!'

'Sor... uh, okay!'

I pinched the bridge of my nose.

This wasn't getting anywhere.

Take a deep breath...

...count to ten.

...and then...

'...so, where do you want to eat?'

Once again, silence.

'...you don't know?'

She shrugged sheepishly.

'...are you even hungry?'

She made the gesture for so-so.

'...Jesus Christ... Kagome! Choose a place!'

She flushed, some of her old spark returning in response to my demand.

'Why do I have to choose?!'

I snapped at her, 'Your invite!'

'Fine! Wacdonalds!'

She knew I hated Wacdonalds.

But by then, I didn't care.

'Fine!'

'Fine!'

I heard her huff angrily.

She pushed past me, storming ahead of me.

...And something inside me felt relieved.

This Kagome was better than the simpering Kagome who apologized for everything.

This was the Kagome I knew and loved.

Heh...Good thing I always knew how to push her buttons.

When we got there, she ordered a large burger, and fries, and a milkshake.

...An apple pie, and a sundae.

...the whole damn works...

...I got a lousy soda, because after her order, I didn't even have pocket change to get something even if I had wanted to.

...not that I did.

...cause processed food was nasty.

I'm more al natural when it came to it, and a large t-bone was more my kind of cow.

She ate slowly, as if trying to prolong.

...I didn't push the subject...

...I was enjoying being around her, and wasn't in any rush to talk about what a piece of scum I had been.

I mean, really, who enjoys talking about what an asshole they are?

I remember once, Miroku had gotten wasted- and being ever insightful as he always was- told me how he believed that people only admitted they were assholes so they had an excuse to be an asshole.

Because if it was common knowledge, then they had every excuse not to change.

...though no one in the world had an excuse not to change.

But, me being the dumbass I was, said that everyone was an asshole.

Everyone had one.

It was living proof.

...Somehow, then, it made sense...

He laughed, haha, oh Yash.

And drank himself silly.

...but, he was right, in the end.

...some people were just too cowardly to change.

...and I had already begun by quitting my drinking.

And I had to be a man, and live up to my mistakes.

Like my father never did.

...and I know, I didn't want to be like him.

'...are you sure that's all you're going to have?'

She asked, almost too innocently.

I wasn't sure if she was making fun of me.

'...I'm good. You know I hate this shit.'

She smiled, teasingly.

'Right.'

...she had been making fun of me.

I was grouchy because of it, but I knew I deserved so much worse.

...I deserved to be excommunicated from her world.

And I was her number one fanatic, though she may never have known exactly how much...

'...I'm sorry, Kagome.'

...I had said it, just like that, just out of the blue.

I hadn't even planned it.

It was supposed to come with a long, drawn out speech with plenty of self-bashing and worshipping on her end.

Maybe some daisies and sunshine.

...little rainbow in the end.

Proclaimations of love, endless devotion, and her sweet kisses of heaven...

...

Guess I wasn't ever so extravagant.

I always had been pretty blunt.

...and yet, still, she seemed surprised by my apology.

...Even when I should have been licking the ground she walked on, and kissing her toes, begging for mercy.

My leg was shaking underneath the table, and I knew I was impatient for her to say something.

...and when she didn't, I was angry.

'Well? Forgive me or not?'

...It was probably persumptuous to think she'd forgive me right away.

...even though, she always had...

...still, there was that tiny voice in the back of my head that constantly reminded me why I didn't deserve it.

'...yeah, I do.'

It was so simple.

...it was the beauty of our friendship and eventual relationship.

I could have disemboweled her cat, and she would still forgive me.

What had I done to be so worthy of an angel like her?

...to this day, I don't know.

'...good.'

It was all I could say.

I hadn't been expecting it, honestly.

I half-wanted her to tell me to get out of her face.

...that she didn't ever want to see me again.

...that she hated me.

...But I think, the true lesson was I had to learn how to live with myself and my guilt.

It's hard to hate yourself when you've been forgiven.

...And they're smiling at you loving, despite what you did, and they're all that matters.

...and that one person, that one single, solitary human being who became your world stuck by your side through the thick part of it, and came out loving you all the more.

That was the wonder of Higurashi Kagome.

Was it all anti-climatic?

...not really.

We had our problems.

We had our gambles.

Our relationship was definitely rocky in the beginning, and I had to earn her trust again.

...I would never have asked for anything less, despite the arguements and our headstrong battles.

It made it all the more wonderful in the future.

...we had survived.

...It took me a long, long time to work up the courage to ask her to be with me. Before then, somehow, we had gone back to being the best friends we had been... what seemed like a lifetime ago.

She would listen to me with that sweet smile on her face, and not say a damn thing while I rambled about whatever was on my mind... and she would just listen.

...simply, listen...

She would bring Shippo... that bright-eyed little pipsqueak I hadn't seen in forever. And she would bring him only around me.

I knew it meant she trusted me.

...the others were far too damaged in her eyes, and she wanted to shelter the boy... Only a year or so younger than all of us, from all of it.

I understood.

Sometimes, she would light up a cigarette when she listened, and I would try and ignore it... but it reminded me of my own poisons.

Finally, one day, I remember reaching out and grabbing her hand.

I asked her to quit, for me.

...and she did.

...Granted, she was a grouchy, bitchy, pessimistic wench for quite a while after that... but I could take it.

I would take anything from her at that point.

I remember the day I asked her, too, like it had only happened yesterday...

I was laying my head in her lap, and she was doing some girly thing with my hair... which I only let her do, as long as no one was watching...

She was humming, happy, so full of life and so content to be around me I had to wonder if any of our tragedies ever really happened.

That day, they seemed like a horrible, untouchable dream that was being left behind as I slowly woke up.

'K'gome?'

For some reason, that day, I was sleepy. I think I was relaxed... the sun was warm, and not uncomfortable. There was a breeze. And with Kagome's fingers in my hair, who couldn't feel good?

...It was on the verge of spring, around that time. We were about to enter the next school year. I had been held behind a year because of my abscences... but it was the final year for her.

I was happy for her, either way.

And, I was almost happy I had been held behind.

I was able to do it right this time around.

...I wanted a future.

'Yes?' she smiled down at me.

She was so radiant, covered in sunlight and wearing it like it was meant for her.

'...stay with me.'

It was like that. The straightforwardness of our relationship. I adored it.

The only problem was, she misunderstood me.

I remember, she looked confused, with a touch of affection obvious in her face.

'I'll always stay with you, Inuyasha. You know that.'

I rolled my eyes...

...and I sat up, looking down at that beautiful, puzzled face.

'No, stupid...'

I said it, I know, much softer than it sounded.

I remember, giving into that desire I had held onto for years...

I cradled her face, finally, taking her as my own... and giving her that kiss I had been dying to give her for so long.

I felt like a starving man, and she was the sustenance I needed.

She was shocked, I could tell, by the way she stilled under me.

...but it wasn't long before she was responding, moving those delicate lips underneath me, and I felt like I could breathe after years and years of drowning.

That was the day I made her mine.

I remember, I only pulled away when she was breathless, her eyes fluttering and her face flushed so prettily...

And I clarified myself.

'...stay... with me, Kagome?'

Those blue eyes, they looked up at me... and I was reminded of the endlessness of the sky.

And she opened her lips, hesitantly, to give me her answer.

...this was her gamble.

Risk being hurt by me, like she had been wounded so deeply?

Or trust me with the heart I had broken so many times, so thoroughly...?