InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Killer Inside ❯ Chapter 7: Love Will Tear Us Apart ( Chapter 7 )

OOOOHHH!! Update! I will warn you there's… Well, I'm not sure if it's an actual lemon or if it's just… well, if I get bitched at on FF-dot-net then I'll know I did something bad.

Thank you to my reviewers and to those of you who corrected me on my analysis of "Ring Around the Rosies." I was just going off what one of my English professors had said. He was kinda nuts, so perhaps we're both right… and perhaps we're both wrong. I'd rather we were both right, but the universe can be a bitch.

BTW, I feel weird answering individual reviews, not because I don't appreciate you or anything like that, but I'll only do it when I feel it's necessary. A lot of my reviews have been just "write more!" and there's not much I can say to that. The fact that I'm updating should be a response to that. ::hugs:: See, I do love you all! If you have a specific comment… I'll work on answering you. I might even just e-mail you. I'm just kinda leery of that because… I'm not sure why… People kinda scare the crap out of me.

I don't own Inu and I don't own any music.

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Chapter 7: Love Will Tear Us Apart

Inuyasha paced. It had been four hours since he'd told Kagome he needed to think. She was still there, though, working on the decimated garden out front. Occasionally, his ears would turn towards the sound of her voice; she sang while she worked.

His mind was churning. The possibility that Kikyou's death had nothing to do with him had occurred to him before but had never been presented to him in such a manner; that her death might have been "business" rather than personal somehow made it all that much more tragic. Kagome's ideas were nothing new to him. He'd thought the same thing over and over again, wondering if she'd angered someone somehow. But she was little more than a research assistant, a simple peon in a sea of peons. She hadn't even been involved in a high profile project, just a simple drug test.

But Kagome had some valid points and he'd be a fool not to look into them. Somewhere in the maze of information there had to be proof that he was not a murderer, that his claws had not ended Kikyou's life. Of course, Kagome had not dismissed the idea that he'd been involved; Inuyasha had been furious at that.

Flashback to 3 hours ago:

"If it was business, then I couldn't have killed her." He said, eyes lighting up and a smile beginning. "Right?"

Kagome cringed. "Not necessarily, unfortunately."

"What do you mean `not necessarily,' bitch?" he roared at her.

"All I'm saying," she replied calmly, "is that you don't remember what happened. You could have been manipulated into killing her. You were pretty doped up when they found you…"

"Hanyou are pretty drug resistant, Kagome." He shook his head. "I'd like to think that a few hits of something wouldn't send me into a psychotic killing spree."

"You want me to check the records at the hospital?"

"What?"

"They'll have a record of what exactly was in your system, if they could identify it. Sango said there were some unidentified compounds in your bloodstream when you were found."

"Sango? You talked to Sango about this!" Inuyasha growled at her. "Why the hell would you talk to her about it?"

"She's a police officer, Inuyasha. It's not like she's going to jeopardize justice by lynching you or something." Kagome rolled her eyes. "She was part of the initial investigation! I asked her what she knew about you and lead her to tell me about when you two were found."

"And what did she say?" he asked suspiciously.

"That she's not surprised you don't remember anything because you were so drugged you were literally incoherent."

"You told her I couldn't remember!" He dug his claws into his palms. So she betrayed me as well. "You bitch! I was trusting you!"

Kagome's eyes had flashed fire at that. "And you can continue to do so! I made her promise not to tell anyone, Inuyasha. She keeps her word. I am trying to help you! The more I know the more I can help." She stood and walked over to him. "I will not betray you." He blinked at her and glared into her eyes. He saw no fear and no deceit. Her scent was clean of both as well.

"Feh." He looked away from her. "Fine, bitch. So what else."

Kagome bit her lip. "I do have a few questions."

"Shoot." He sat back on the stool and waved her away. She went back to her plate but only to pick it up and take it to the sink.

"Was Kikyou's missing notebook personal or work related?"

"Work related. I think. There were actually three specific ones that I noticed were missing. She wrote in them when she was working on formulae and when she was just sitting around." He snorted. "Of course, I'd be willing to bet she did formulae in her sleep."

"She was quite talented," Kagome said quietly. "Her ability to meld her magic into mathematics and to create with the two was unique. Very few miko can use an algebraic formula to harmonize elements. And fewer still can use that harmonization to blend the elements together."

"I know."

"I think she saw something she wasn't supposed to and someone knew about it."

Inuyasha hung his head. "She might have."

"Inuyasha… we'll find out what happened." Kagome walked close to him again, her hand outstretched to comfort him. When her hand touched his shoulder he flinched but she didn't move. God, it felt so right to have her touch him. He wanted to lean into the touch, to have her stroke his shoulders and soothe the tension away. For a moment he almost gave into the desire to wrap his arms around her and bury his face between her breasts, to feel her small gentle hands smoothing his hair and petting his ears. Her scent and her heartbeat would calm him.

But he instead looked up into her eyes, put his clawed and callused hand over her soft one and stood. With a sad smile he lifted her hand from his shoulder and gently put it by her side, trying not to tremble. She was affecting him and he couldn't let her. She deserved better than someone like him and he wasn't worthy of her. Not after what had happened with Kikyou. He couldn't let her get too tangled in this.

"Kagome…" He paused and closed his eyes. One clawed hand moved up to her face and hovered there. When he opened his eyes she was still staring up at him. Pulling his hand back, he backed away and hung his head, hiding his eyes from her. "I need to think, Kagome."

She sighed then and he heard her shift her feet uncomfortably. "Do you want me to clean up-"

"No. I'll do it. I just need to be alone to think." He looked at her again and smiled. "I'm not trying to chase you away, honest. You can come back later, Kagome."

"OK," she said, a bit wary. "I'll be outside."

He'd cleaned up, and then cleaned the whole kitchen. Then he'd roamed the halls of his house, his mind wandering.

Most of the doors that had been closed when the family had moved away had not been opened since. Kikyou had had little interest in making the house a home; most of her attention had been focused on her work and occasionally she'd devote some time to him. She hadn't berated him for being messy or tried to cook him a decent meal; she either stepped over the pile of clothes or books if there was a mess or ordered in if he hadn't cooked. He stopped in front of the larger doors to the library and looked in. Suddenly he was swamped with memory.

Kikyou had only opened the library to see if there was something she could use concealed in the haphazard stacks. Unfortunately, the only things she felt were of use to her were the chairs and tables that had been there for generations. She often used the room just to find a quite place to study and work. He remembered the day she'd found it she'd been excited. She had smiled and teased him. Her voice had been a dark alto and he could still almost hear its echo in the room she'd used.

"Yash, how'd you let this place get so dusty?" she'd teased. She had come over the day after discovering the room to help him clean it. They had only been dating a few months but Inuyasha was smitten. "I'm pretty sure that some of this dust has to be older than you even!"

"It wasn't dusty before we moved away," he'd replied. "I guess I kinda just forgot about this place."

"How could you? Your ancestors were tutored at these tables. Your mother learned to read in this very room, I'm sure."

Inuyasha had shrugged and shook his head, not impressed by the stacks and stacks of old books surrounding them. "So did I. It wasn't that amazing, to be honest with you."

Kikyou had scowled at him, a twinkle of humor in her grey eyes. Then she had waved her hand as if dismissing him. "You have so much family history here," she'd sighed. "You should preserve it."

"History is just that: history. The past is done and gone. It's over and there's nothing that can change it. I prefer to focus on the present and the future, to do something that will affect them. Both have much more interesting things in them." He'd smirked then and grabbed her waist. "Plus you're here in the present. Why do I need the past when all I need is here, right now?"

"Honestly, Yash!" She had smiled at him, amused. Leaning into him, she'd wrapped her arms around him and held him close. "The past is important too, you know. How you became who you are, the people who helped you get there, the events that shaped you. They're important."

"Sure, Kikyou." He had held her closer and smiled into her hair. "But the future is important too. And as long as you're in my future, I'm a happy man."

"I'll always be with you, Yash. Past, present and future." She'd kissed him then, her lips lightly brushing over his, teasing him. "I love you."

The memory faded. She lied. She's not here. She's not a part of my future anymore, he thought sadly.

He felt the grief and the guilt again and sighed. Kikyou had not fully accepted him, but she had loved him, that she could not have faked. Why she had ruined everything and been with another man was beyond him. He had tried to give her everything, had been supportive of her and her career. He had done all he could for her.

And she had betrayed him.

Now she was dead and he was alone. His ears strayed to the singing voice out front. Kagome, he thought. Well, he wasn't quite alone. It was a strange and discomfiting feeling, this desire for a girl who was nearly the image of the woman he'd almost married. He wasn't quite sure he liked it but he knew there was no way he could act on it.

It was even stranger to realize that she wanted him as well. If I could, he thought. If there were any way I could have her, I would. The thought startled him. Did he really want her that much? Was there that much pull? All his instincts screamed yes.

Given the opportunity, he realized, he would claim her.

The thought shook him. She was too innocent and too sweet. She was also intelligent, powerful and strong. He could not touch her, not until he figured out just what had happened to Kikyou, just what his sins were. And if he had killed Kikyou…

He could never claim Kagome then.

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It was dark when she crawled from his bed, still naked. She could see flickers of dawn outside the window above the bed. The long window faced north, presenting her with a view of both the Pacific Ocean and the mountains to the east. Her long dark hair created a curtain around her body but she swept it aside so it streamed down her back and swung around her hips. She was unashamed of her body in his presence.

She knew he was feigning sleep and chose to play along. Standing by the side of the bed, she turned to stare at him for a moment in longing. In this moment, she thought, I am content. I am completely happy. This will not be the last moment of this bliss. Though it had been months since they met, it had only taken one date for her to fall into his bed. Of course, all it really would have taken was for him to show any interest in her at all. He could have snapped his fingers and demanded that she pleasure him and she would have jumped at the chance.

Yeah, it's probably best not to let him know that. She smiled contentedly, still gazing at the partially covered form of her new lover. He's got an ego the size of China, she thought, chuckling inside, stroke it anymore and it won't fit on the planet. Reaching down, she swept a few strands of his silver hair away from his face and traced his markings. The violet-red stripes were so elegant, she felt, as was the blue crescent moon on his forehead.

"My Sesshomaru," she whispered, knowing he could hear her. Rin then turned and walked into the bathroom to shower.

Five minutes later she was just wetting her hair when she heard the door to the bathroom open. She smiled into the stream of hot water and pretended not to hear, though she could not hide her excitement. She bit her lip in anticipation. A shiver ran through her a few moments later when a clawed hand slid over the skin of her side and up her ribcage. She giggled in delight. A firmly muscled arm wrapped itself around her waist and she couldn't help but groan, the smile on her face growing wider. When she felt the heat of his body pressing against her back, she let out a full-fledged moan and a gasp. The smile disappeared.

"My Rin," he whispered in her ear, bending his head down to hers.

His lips touched her neck in an open mouthed kiss then slid down to her shoulder where he lightly scraped at her skin with his fangs. Hands slid over her body making her skin break out in goose bumps even under the stream of hot water. He traced her curves with his claws, growling as she writhed beneath his touch, her own hands skimming the skin of his arms.

Suddenly, she turned around in his arms and looked up into his eyes, challenging him. She willed him to see the love and the passion she felt reflected in her ebony eyes. For a moment, all she saw was confusion in his eyes, but it was quickly gone and then his golden eyes were ablaze with emotion.

It was highly unlikely that anyone else would ever see him this way, so controlled by his emotions. Sesshomaru Tai, the great taiyoukai of the west, eldest son of the Taisho of the inuyoukai, was known for his cold demeanor and calm presence. CEOs trembled in fear of him. Demons shrank from him. But Rin knew the truth; beneath his icy exterior lay an unquenchable fire. She was the only witness; she was the only fuel.

From the moment she had laid eyes on him she knew that he was the only man, human or demon, that she would ever love. Their meeting had been accidental, a brief run in on the street. Sesshomaru had accidentally knocked her into the way of a passing bus; had his demon reflexes not been so quick, she would have been killed. Hanging on to him for dear life, she had noticed the surprise that had passed though his eyes for a second as their souls recognized each other. Then he had let her go and was gone.

The next day she had been surprised and exhilarated to find him in her office; he was her new business consultant. She was a different type of client for him; she was younger and more willing to take risks than most. For months they had worked along side each other and Rin knew he was not oblivious to the attraction between them. The day his contract was up, he had asked her to dinner. Dinner had led her here, to this moment.

Rin smiled up into his fierce gaze and raised her lips to his. Warm and wet, his lips slanted over hers. He clutched her to him as if desperate to touch every inch of her body. Her hands roamed over his taut muscles, making his breath ragged and his hands shake with desire.

"Sessh!" She gasped as his lips took the place of his hands. Her body bore marks from their earlier lovemaking; welts from claws and scratches from fangs marred her skin. He lapped at the marks he'd made, healing them with his tongue. Even after they were healed, her skin smooth and clear, his tongue continued to caress her. He was gentler now; his need not so raw, his desire not so sharp. Rin could feel her blood reaching a fevered heat.

When she couldn't take anymore, she pushed him down. He submitted to her whims as she dragged him to the floor of the shower. She took him into her and soon both were gasping. For long moments after, neither moved, each completely spent and enjoying the warmth and love in the embrace. Rin could feel a loud rumbling, almost like a purr, in the chest beneath her cheek. She giggled and nuzzled him with her nose, a smile on her parted lips.

"Mmmmm," she mumbled lazily, "Sesshy, are you sure you're a dog demon, love? That sounded suspiciously like a purr to me."

"Keh," he snorted elegantly, "This Sesshomaru is going to ignore that very insulting remark. A purr indeed. I am no neko." Rin smirked then began nibbling on his collarbone. "You are too young and uneducated to know that some dogs will, when content, make a rumbling brux-like noise that is akin to a purr but is, technically speaking, not a purr."

"Of course, my lord Sesshomaru." She moved upwards and kissed his lips. "You are far more refined than any cat could ever be." He flexed under her slight weight, and then smoothly stood, taking her with him to stand under the still hot stream of water. "This feels so good, showering with you." Sesshomaru merely nodded. She reached for the soap and began to lather it in her hands, sniffing delicately. "Sandalwood. Is this your usual soap?"

"Yes."

"Do you mind if I use it?"

"No, I do not mind. In fact, I would be very pleased to have my scent mingled with yours." A slight smile graced his usually expressionless lips. Rin drank in the sight of him, naked and wet in the shower with her. His long silver hair was matted down, his pointed ears prominent, and she could see all of his beautiful violet-red markings. Just over his hipbones, two nearly magenta stripes curled around either side of his waist. Biting her lip, Rin gave in to her desire to touch them, her soapy hands sliding over his skin with ease.

"Rin. Give me the soap." His voice was slightly hoarse. She handed over the soap and then slid her hands over his chest, her hands still slippery and soapy. They washed each other, exploring and discovering. Rin lathered shampoo into his long hair and he did likewise with hers. When both were completely clean, and then some, Sesshomaru carried her out of the shower and they dried off. Sesshomaru dressed then gave her some of his clothes to wear.

"Are you sure?" she asked.

"I'm sure. I'll take you home in a few hours, after breakfast perhaps, to change and," he swallowed and then cleared his throat, "This Sesshomaru would be honored if you would spend the day with me."

"Rin would love to."

"Rin, you are a human and a very young one at that-"

"Not that young'" she interrupted. "I am twenty." She rolled her eyes at him and began to change into the clothes he'd given her. All of it was way too big, but then he was nearly a foot taller than her.

"Yes, you are twenty and compared to me you are extremely young. Rin, I am more than seven hundred years old. When you were born, I still looked exactly like this." She finished dressing and walked out of the bedroom into the hall. He followed, still speaking. "I will not appear any older for another three hundred years. My father is over fifteen hundred years old."

"Are you saying I'm not good enough because I'm not a demon woman in her fifth century?" Rin raised an eyebrow at him. She had stopped in the hallway and turned towards him. Now she was beginning to get annoyed. "That's such utter bullshit and you know it."

"Rin, I will not accept that tone from you." His voice became stern and cold for a moment. "Because you are so young and human you may not be aware of the implications of our… joining."

"Go on."

"When we first met it was instantly obvious that we were meant for each other. You are my soul mate and should you ever die, I would be lost, but I would also find you again. I will, of course, do what I can do ensure that you do not die in the first place."

"I already knew that Youkai are capable of extending the lives of their chosen mates, to a point."

"True. My father tried it only once. My own mother was a demon and died giving birth to my sister, who was stillborn. His second wife, my half-brother's mother, was with him for nearly two hundred years before she died. A cancer had invaded her body and not even his great strength could keep it from killing her. She was also his soul mate."

"Do you fear my death?" She smiled and kissed him. "I am still young, love, I have much more life ahead of me."

"Which is what I was trying to say. I should have waited for you, until you were older and more ready for a step like this."

"What are you talking about?"

"I am a patient man but you make me brash."

"I make you brash. Okay… That's a bad thing?" She turned from him and began walking down the hall again towards the stairs. "Um, can I get some breakfast before you explain that last part to me? I can't think straight on an empty stomach and you totally made me ravenous last night."

"Thank you for the compliment, my dear. Unfortunately, I cannot cook, but I'll awaken Jaken and have him fix something for you," he said, referring to his servant who practically lived at the mansion.

"Please, don't," Rin replied, her face twisting in distaste and a bit of anxiety. "He squawked at me last night when he opened the door and I have the feeling he might not like me too much. Not to mention he doesn't look like someone I'd trust to cook my food."

Sesshomaru nodded slightly. "He has some negative feelings towards humans but would never openly degrade or threaten you," he explained. "He has been with me for two and a half centuries and is unaccustomed to my keeping company with anyone. To see a human woman being served dinner at my estate must have been a shock to him. But he would never say a word against any of my guests, regardless of the species or gender. He fears me too much."

"Does Jaken cook all your meals?"

Sesshomaru's cool façade wavered for a moment. "Yes and no. I do not generally eat mortal food and I very rarely eat it cooked."

"You mean you eat raw demon meat."

"Yes. For the most part."

"What were you eating last night? That wasn't raw."

He smiled a bit and grasped her hand as they walked down the stairs. "I was trying something new."

She raised an eyebrow. "Oh? Cooked demon meat?"

"Angus steak, rare, with lemon pepper sauce."

A grin spread across her face. "You ate people food? For me?"

"Yes, Rin. For you I would do just about anything." He smiled down at her face gently and squeezed her hand.

"You ate steak! How did you like it?"

"Honestly?" She nodded. "It was rather bland. Demon meat is very different from that of any mortal animal. There is a different texture and feel and it doesn't always stay… dead until eaten. It was quite strange that it simply lay there and waited for me to eat it. And it did not scream…"

"You know what! Let's not discuss your food."

"No. I'll find something here for you to eat."

After a lengthy search of the kitchen, a lone package of ramen was found and Rin jumped on it. While she ate, Sesshomaru sat with her, mostly simply watching her.

"You had Ramen. Why?" she asked.

"My half-brother, Inuyasha, used to eat Ramen almost exclusively. He visited a few years ago, before his fiancé died. I think he was trying to mend fences before he got too serious with her." He looked off towards the windows. "We didn't get along too well. Still don't. After Kikyou died, he changed. He has not returned and honestly, I don't expect him to. We did not part well, though I did call him a few days ago to ask his advice on what human women eat."

"You're so cute. What was Kikyou's last name?"

"I'm not sure."

"Was she by any chance related to the miko Kaede of Musashi Manor in Louisiana?" Rin grinned. Oh! If it's the same Inuyasha I think it is, this is going to be very interesting!

"Actually, yes. She was Kaede's great-great-neice."

"Oh my god!" Rin squealed. "He is who I thought he was!"

Sesshomaru covered his ears and glared at her. "Explain."

"Three years ago my distant cousin was engaged to a hanyou and was murdered shortly before the wedding. No one is sure what happened but we knew that she loved him very much. Her name was Kikyou and her fiancé was Inuyasha!" She ginned and jumped in her seat. "I've fallen in love with the brother of the man my cousin was to marry."

"How closely related were you?"

"Oh, her grandfather was my grandfather's cousin. Our great grandmothers were sisters. Kagome, who's living with Kaede now, is more closely related; our grandfathers were brothers."

"Oh." Sesshomaru paused for a moment. "Did you just say you'd fallen in love with me?"

Rin grinned. "Yes. I was wondering if you would catch that." She stood and walked over to him, wrapping her arms around him. "I love you, Sesshomaru." He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer.

"Good. Because I love you. I claimed you last night."

She smiled. "I know. I felt it." She kissed the crescent moon on his forehead and then pressed her forehead to it.

"You are mine, Rin Shinuta," he whispered, then claimed her lips with his.

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I was going to write more, but it's been a while since I posted and I'm kinda going through some writer's block on a certain situation. (Kagome and Inuyasha talking now) I hope no one was offended by my sesshy/rin scene. I really love that couple.

No fun facts today, other than the realization that mums (the flower) smell like vomit and are not good to walk past when you're not feeling well after eating something with sauerkraut in it and then drinking tequila. Tequila, good. Sauerkraut, BAD. Mums… ::shudders::

Read and review. THANK YOU!!!!

Oh, chapter title comes from the song "Love Will Tear Us Apart" by Joy Division. Other special songs were "The Hounds of Winter" by Sting, Elvis Costello's version of the Beatle's "You've Got to Hide Your Love Away," "Angels Would Fall" by Melissa Ethridge and "Man in the Long Black Coat" by Bob Dylan, versions by the man himself and Joan Osborne. Also important were "Hanging by a Moment" by Lifehouse, "Tremble," "Hold Me Down" and "Closer" by Better Than Ezra, "Beautiful Freak" by Eels, "Drive" by Incubus and "With or Without You" by U2.