InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The World Through His Eyes ❯ I Wish You Would ( Chapter 15 )

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, I'm just having fun with them until the men in the pretty white coats come back to take my toys away. Remember that there were no hanyous harmed in the making of this chapter. The band and record company own the single sentence from the song I WISH YOU WOULD that I used.

 

 

AN: Thanks for waiting so long guys. My life keeps falling apart at the seams but maybe I've got it pined back up right now.

 

In other news this story won first place in the IY fanguilds quaterly contest! I think it took best romance! I'm so proud I think I smiled for a sold week!! Thanks to all of you who voted for me and made it possible! I don't deserve just high awards and praise!

 

 

 

::RECAP::

 

 

 

“You'll what, Inuyasha? You can't stop me from speaking the truth!” Her eyes held nothing but defiance and determination, but inside she was a mess. They were so close now that she couldn't help but breathe in some of his used oxygen with every breath.

 

“I can stop you from talking bitch! And if you don't think I will, just try me. I know what you're trying to do, you're so scared that I'm going to up and leave you that you're trying to make it impossible for me to stay! This isn't about Kikyou dying, or the dream you had the other night. This isn't even about how you think I feel. This is about you being too afraid to fucking accept that I love you!” She couldn't breath. No, he couldn't mean that. There was no way that he loved her. She'd felt what he felt for Kikyou. Saw the pain in his eyes….The wall that she'd built to keep him out started to crumble and the first trickles of his emotions started seeping into her mind.

 

`No, no no no no! What am I supposed to do?'

 

“You can't mean that---“

 

“To hell with this.” He swore with a low growl before pressing his lips to hers in a bruising kiss. His eyes burned into hers the whole time, not letting her look away. She gasp when one of his hands found it's way to her waist. Inuyasha used her surprise to deepen the kiss. He was desperate to prove to them both how untrue her words were. To prove that he loved her like he said he did. To prove that she was the one he wanted by his side for all time. He felt the dam she'd put up between them finally shatter and he almost drowned in the feeling of Kagome. She was back in his mind. A wreck emotionally, but he didn't care. As long as she was here, apart of him, he didn't care. She was wholly his again. He quickly found the place that was purely her in his mind and sent her a wave of emotion to match the feelings he was trying to put into the kiss.

 

As for Kagome, her protection against Inuyasha was finally broken, but she couldn't find the will to care. His assaults on her senses were leaving her weak in the knees. Her eyes began to grow heavy lidded, but she still couldn't look away from his burning amber gaze. She moaned and gave up the fight to not kiss him back. Inuyasha's other hand moved from the tree and into her hair. He pulled her head back ,with a gentleness that belied his rough treatment of her lips, so that he could gain a greater access to her mouth.

 

Some where in the back of his mind he acknowledged that this wasn't just about giving her proof anymore, but he tried valiantly to ignore those more primal instincts as Kagome tentively started to explore his mouth in the same fashion he was using to probe hers. One of his sharp fangs bit into her questing tongue and the bittersweet taste of blood filled their mouths. Inuyasha suddenly pulled away from her, breathing heavy. The taste of her blood on his tongue had almost cost him his control over his instincts.

 

Damn, how he wanted her….

 

Wanted to do to her…

 

He finally broke eye contact with her glazed over eyes as he licked at the stream of red trickling out of the corners of her swollen lips. He leaned his forehead against hers and struggled to calm his racing heart.

 

“I like you alive and warm, Koishii. Not dead like Kikyou. And if you don't believe me still, I'd be happy to try and prove it to you as many times as I have to.”

 

 

 

::END RECAP::

 

 

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

Chapter 15: I Wish You Would

 

But tonight I made a wish and I sure hope that it comes true

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It was raining. Hard. Great sheets of water cascaded from the sky in a torrent. To Kagome it seemed as if the very angels in heaven were weeping. And at the moment she felt like joining them. Inuyasha has kissed her the night before. Not a tender, sweet kiss, but one that seared her very insides with its angry passion.

 

He'd also said he loved her….

 

Her lips still felt slightly bruised….

 

She raised a tenitive hand to her lips to feel the slightly puffy flesh. On their on accord her eyes drifted to where the object of her affection and frustration sat. He was watching her again. This time he'd caught her with her fingers presses to her lips. Inuyasha has the nerve to smirk at her and to raise one eyebrow. It was as if declaring his love for her had somehow freed a hidden part of himself. Unbidden, her memories of the night before came swirling back to her with a torrent of emotions that had her insides raging with a force that could rival the storm brewing outside. In the back of her mind she was thankful that they'd been able to find lodging in the village elder's hut before the thunder-storm had hit.

 

“I like you alive and warm, Koishii. Not dead like Kikyou. And if you don't believe me still, I'd be happy to try and prove it to you as many times as I have to.” He'd said those words and then pressed another series of kissed to her face and forehead, growling quietly as he reassured himself that she was hale and whole. Kagome was still too caught up in the feelings his kiss had ignited in her mind and body to pay much attention to where his hands roved. If she hadn't been so dazed she surly would have sat him, no matter how much pain she would have felt as a result.

 

He picked her up then, bridal style, and started to carry her back through the forest toward where they're friends were waiting for them.

 

“I'm yours Kagome.” He'd whispered that just before they came into sight of the camp fire, nipping at her ear a little to underline his point. She'd felt so overwhelmed then. Inuyasha loved her. But he was supposed to love Kikyou. This was her greatest dream and her worst nightmare rolled up into one. Her greatest dream because she'd loved her hanyou for years, worst nightmare because every time she'd let herself hope that his feelings for her were more than simple friendship she'd been crushed by the weight of Kikyou's ever present, perfect, shadow. It was even worse this time, because they weren't just simple friends anymore, could never be simply friends again. Things would never go back to being safe and comfortable again. Kagome was going to have to make a choice too, just like Inuyasha.

 

Love out of a limb, or staying in your safety zone, Kagome?

 

It was a question that had been staring her in the face for a while and she'd been refusing to answer it up until now. Kagome had just assumed that Inuyasha would choose Kikyou before she had to make up her mind. She'd never expected that he would choose her. She had what she'd always hoped for, but now she didn't know what to do with it.

 

It was all very confusing.

 

And Kagome would have liked to go off alone to think about it, but Inuyasha refused to let her out of his sight…or out of his arms for that matter. He'd only sat her down long enough to let her eat then he'd scooped her back up again. Of course she'd protested but he'd only glared down at her saying: “Keh, every time I let you out of my sight you try to untie our bound, hell you even tried to give away part of my soul this time! I'm not letting you out of my sight tonight Kagome, so just forget about it and stop squirming.”

 

In anger she had thought about trying to block him again, but the frantic way he'd clutched at her and buried his face into her hair had removed that thought from her head. She'd apologized then by wrapping her arms around his neck tightly. Inuyasha had silently taken that as her consent and jumped up into the branches of one of the overhanging trees to rest for the night.

 

The next morning Kagome had woken up as Inuyasha sat her feet on the ground. He'd held her for a moment until she'd gained her balance…kissed her in clear view of all their friends much to the amusement of Miroku…and then had the nerve to smirk when she blushed.

 

And he'd been acting like that all day. Every time she got close enough for him to steal a kiss or a soft touch he did and always with that smirk on his face. And frankly Kagome was getting tired of that smirk and the confusion that went with it. Although all those kisses were kind of nice…

 

Kagome felt her face begin to heat up again. With a sound of frustration that came from the very depths of her soul, she got up and jerked on her yellow raincoat. She couldn't stand to be in the close confines of the hut any longer. She was going to get some time to herself away from that smirking hanyou right now, whether he liked it or not.

 

“Kagome-sama, where are you going?” Miroku asked as the girl marched passed him toward the water bucket in the corner.

 

“To get fresh water.” She all but growled not even sparing Inuyasha a glance.

 

“But we have,” He pointed toward the full water pail, “enough to last us a good while. Surely you don't want to go out in the rain?” Kagome picked up the pail with a little difficulty and managed to slosh half its contents into the ashes of the cook fire.

 

“Looks like we need some more.” She could feel Inuyasha's laughing eyes as she made her excuse to leave. If she didn't love him so much she would have killed him at that moment.

 

“Let her go out if she wants to.” Inuyasha spoke up for the first time. Kagome ignored him.

 

“But Inuyasha, if she goes out in this rain she could get sick.” Sango pointed out. Kagome sent her friend a glare. She was not helping.

 

“Keh, no she won't.” Kagome started out again, thinking that the matter was over, that he'd finally decided to let her have some time to herself, until she heard the sound of some one standing up behind her.

 

`Oh, Kami-sama, no. I need some time to myself you jerk!''

 

“She's not going to get sick `cause I'm going to go with her and make sure she doesn't get into trouble.” She knew that if she turned around right now she'd see that smirk again so she kept her back to him.

 

“Inuyasha, I'm perfectly capable of getting the water by myself.” She assured him through clenched teeth.

 

“Ah, Kagome-sama, I don't think Inuyasha is worried about the water.” Miroku spoke up from behind her, “He probably just wants to get you alone so that he can---“The sound of something wooden (probably a bowl) hitting the monk upside the head told Kagome that Sango had finally decided to interfered on her behalf.

 

`I'll have to thank her later...or maybe not…she encouraged Inuyasha to go outside with me.'

 

Kagome reached for the door again and from beside her Inuyasha tried to take the half empty bucket from her hand. She tensed and refused to let it go.

 

`I told you I needed some time to myself! Can't you just leave me alone for a few minutes?' A wave of hurt mixed with frustration was his only reply before he picked her up, bucket and all, and headed out the shoji door.

 

“Inuyasha! Put me down!” She hissed in his ear as he bound out into the rain, heading toward the little open-sided hut that housed the village well.

 

“No! There are some things that you and I need to clear up, and every time I let you `think' by yourself things seem to get even more fucked up in there.” He lightly knocked his knuckles against the side of her head to help make his point as he sat her down.

 

“How can you say that?!?” She demanded, immediately moving away from him as soon as he released his grip on her. The more space she put between them would increase her chances to be able to think clearly, or so she hoped.

 

“I can say that because ever time I've about got you convinced that I really care for you, you start trying to second guess me! Why can't you just accept that I fucking love you?” He ran his hands through his hair in a nervous guesture that he'd only picked up resently, “Hell, Kagome, I don't know what else to do to get you to believe me. And I know it's my stupid fault that you can't accept that I love you because I've been such an ass so many times in the past, but---“

 

“I just don't understand!” She cried out, no longer being able to contain herself. The rain beat down harder on the roof of the little hut and the wind blew the falling drops inside so that Kagome's hair quickly became soaked and tangled. “For over two years I've spent every waking moment knowing that I had no chance with you. I knew that Kikyou would always come first because she was first. I hated the fact that I'd always be second best, but I tried to accept it because I wanted you to be happy. Even after we became bound I still assumed that somehow, if there was a way, you'd pick her, since our being tied together was an accident anyway! Now you say you love me, but I don't understand how! Just last month you would have died for her without a second thought, now you love me?” She swung around to face him and flung out her arms in anger. Inuyasha swore under his breath and took a few steps toward her until they stood toe to toe. Now the blowing rain was battering them both with stinging drops but the couple paid no heed to anything but the other's angry words and uneven breathing.

 

“I would have died for you too, without a second thought!”

 

“Maybe, just maybe I want you to live for me instead of promising to die!! Why are always in such a hurry to die?!?”

 

“But I dolive for you! It's because of you that I can stand to take my next breath! You're my mate! With out our connection I would die! Why do you insist on ignoring that?”

 

“You can't just simply love me because of some warped spell! It's just not right!” Her frustration with the situation was compounding his own and he couldn't help the growl that started to vibrate from low in his chest. Why couldn't she just understand? Why did it always have to be so hard with her? Inuyasha took a deep breath and took another step closer to his fustrated mate. He locked his golden eyes with her grey-blue orbs so she would be able to see just how truthful his next words were.

 

“What's not right about it? What's so hard to understand? The world through my eyes is pretty damn simple, Kagome, in case you didn't notice while you were borrowing my sight. I love you, maybe I always have, and I'm fucking certain that I always will. And for the record that stupid spell didn't make me love you, it just made you mine!” Inuyasha was struggling valiantly to hold back his instinct to dominate and just force her to believe him. His growl deepened when Kagome dropped her eyes away from his and took a step back from their closeness and out fully into the rain. He tensed, ready to catch her if she tried to run, but otherwise didn't move to pull her back under the shelter. She would have to accept his words if they were ever going to move forward in their relationship.

 

“But what about Kikyou?” Kagome's bangs were now hanging down in her face and he couldn't tell if it was rain water that was dripping down her chin, or tears.

 

“She's not involved in this. This is between me and you just leave her out---“He made an impatient gesture with his hand when she interrupted him.

 

“But can't you see? I can't leave her out…as long as I'm still her reincarnation, her shadow; I'll never be able to forget that she loved you first…that you loved her first…” Kagome wasn't yelling anymore and the slight sent of salt and sadness in the air told him that the rain wasn't the only thing running off her face. Some of his anger and frustration faded as he reached out to gently pull her out of the rain and toward the center of the well house so that she would be out of the blowing rain. He could feel her compounded confusion as he sat her on the edge of the well and knelt down in front of her.

 

“She didn't love me. She loved what I could do for her. Loved the fact that I could free her from the burden of the jewel and give her a normal life with a little hut and a dozen children. But she didn't love me. And I…I just didn't want to be alone anymore.” Inuyasha reached up as he said this and scrubbed at his own eyes. It was hard to say all of this out loud, but if it helped Kagome to understand his feelings he was willing to pour his heart out.

 

“But you…”

 

“I love you.”

 

“But!--”

 

“No. No buts! I love you and that's all that matters” His voice was desperate as he rose up onto his knees so that he could press his forehead against hers. One of his hands came to rest at the back of her neck in order to press her closer, “You're my other half. I have part of your soul right here.” And his other hand grasped one of her dangling ones and brought it up to rest against his chest right over his heart.” And I'm never letting you have it back, do you hear me? Never.” He pressed a kiss to her forehead and another to her cheek, but kept himself from kissing her lips. He focused on making his feelings as tangible to her as he could, expose everything in his heart to her.

 

“I…I think I'm beginning to understand…but I can't…” She stopped and breathed in a shuttering sigh. Kagome felt like she was drowning in the feelings he was pouring into her through their link. For the first time since all of this mess had started she let herself fully believe that Inuyasha…loved her.

 

Inuyasha loved her. And she loved him.

 

She wanted to tell him that she loved him back, but couldn't seem to push the words through her suddenly too tight throat. A panicky feeling began to rise up in her chest; she had to tell him something! But try as she might the words to express her feelings just wouldn't be forced out.

 

“You don't have to say it yet, Koishii, I understand. As long as you know that you belong to me and you stop trying to leave me I don't care how long it takes you to admit it. Just don't doubt me.” He nuzzled her hair and moved his arms around to wrap her up in a close embrace. He seemed content to just sit there holding her as the storm began to clear up and Kagome was happy to let him. She relaxed against him and concentrated on sending some of her own feelings back to him.

 

Yes, her heart was still confused, and she was still hurting, but she had Inuyasha and at the moment that was enough.

 

It was always just enough.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Shippou sat under the window and listened to the storm as he held one of the books Kagome had brought for him in his lap. He was trying to study today's lesson, but he kept on getting distracted by the colorful pictures in the book. They were much better than the ones in Kagome's own school books, so bright and colorful that it made his tail twitch! He reached up absently and fed Mame-chan an acorn from his pocket as he flipped the page. The picture on this page made him pause for a moment and stare with slightly sad eyes. It was of a family. A real family with a mother, and a father, and a baby. It made him feel a little empty inside because he was starting to forget what his first family had been like.

 

Oh, he still remembered things like his mother's unique sent and the sound of his father's voice, and other things that had been impressed into his brain at a very young age. But their images were beginning to fade from his mind, and his memories of what they had looked like were beginning to grow fuzzy in his mind. It made him sad that he was losing his only connection to his first family, but at the same time part of him didn't mind so much because he had Kagome and Inuyasha. Granted the hanyou wasn't the best father figure in the world, but Shippou was beginning to see him as such. It was only natural seeing that his new mother loved the guy so much.

 

Mame-chan squeaked to get his attention, then demanded another nut. Shippou smiled and shoved another acorn at his little pet. He put aside his serious thoughts and went back to looking at the pictures in the book. A few minutes later a noise at the door alerted him that his mother was finally back. He carefully put his book on the floor before jumping up into her arms.

 

“You're finally back! And you're all wet! I thought Inuyasha wasn't going to let you get sick again!” The little kit shot a glare toward the inu-hanyou and missed Kagome's smile.

 

“Keh, not my fault she doesn't know how to stay out of the rain.” Inuyasha plucked Shippou out of Kagome's arms much to the kitsune's displeasure and helped her shrug out of her rain coat.

 

“It's okay, Shippou-chan. It's only my hair that's wet because I didn't put on a hat. The rest of me is mostly dry.” She took the baby kit back and went to sit beside the fire that someone had lit in her absence. Miroku looked up from his corner and raised an eyebrow; he made a show of looking around before glancing over at Inuyasha then back at Kagome.

 

“Nothing happened monk! Get your damn head out of the gutter.” Inuyasha snarled after catching the monk's glance in his direction. He flopped down beside Kagome at the fire and reached for one of the cooking knives Sango was sharpening.

 

“I am greatly saddened by your lack of faith in my purity of thought. I was simply trying to figure out where the water that Kagome-sama went to fetch was.” He folded his arms up and tucked his hands into his sleeves in what the group had come to call his `wise benevolent priest' pose. Kagome felt her cheeks redden in embarrassment.

 

`How could I have forgotten the water?'

 

“Keh, it's not like it's raining anymore, why don't you go get the water if you're so concerned?” Sango hid her chuckle behind a cough at Inuyasha's words. Miroku has backed himself into that one. She smiled a little broader when the monk sent her a side glance that said he knew what her cough had disguised.

 

“If you're going to go get some water Miroku-sama, why don't you take Sango-chan with you? You can barter for some supplies for our journey tomorrow.” Kagome suggest as she reached over to dig through her yellow pack in search of a brush for her wet hair.

 

“But why do I have to go, Kagome-chan? I need to finish sharpening these blades.” Sango motioned to the assorted cooking knives and to her sword.

 

“Well, someone has to make sure he keeps his hands to himself so that we don't get kicked out of this village before we get the supplies we need.” Kagome pointed out casually. Her face hidden by the curtain of hair she was detangling. Inuyasha had to fight to keep a straight face at the vibes of amusement that were bleeding over from Kagome. Payback was a bitch.

 

“It hurts me deeply that you—“

 

“Save it Houshi-sama, I'm going with you.” Sango sent Kagome a glare as she stood up and dusted off her skirt. She pulled Hiraikotsu from where it rested in the corner of the room and slung its strap over her shoulder. She walked to the door and stood waiting impatiently for Miroku to follow.

 

“Umm…Sango-sama? Surely there are no youkai in this village if Inuyasha and Kirara are so relaxed, maybe you should leave your weapon here?” Miroku hesitantly suggested. How was he ever going to get any closer to her if the threat of her giant weapon was always literally looming overhead?

 

“I'm not afraid of youkai attacking. I'm bringing it for a different reason.” Sango answered, tapping her foot now.

 

“And why is that?” Miroku finally came forward and opened the shoji for her.

 

“To encourage you to keep your hands to yourself.”

 

The sounds of Kagome's laughter and Inuyasha's snickers followed the couple out the door.

 

 

 

 

It was an hour later, and Inuyasha still sat beside the fire but Kagome and Shippou had moved to sit under the window to make good use of the last remaining rays of sun light. Kagome lay on her stomach, propped up by her elbows and pointed to the characters on the page while Shippou sat crossed legged at her shoulder and turned the page. Their chatter along with the warmth of the fire combined together to create a calming atmosphere for Inuyasha as he worked on sharpening Sango's sword. It was busy work really, gliding the blade back and forth over the smooth leather, but it kept his hands occupied and freed his mind to wander.

 

So Kagome finally believed that he loved her…now where did they go from here?

 

He wanted to take her far away from all distractions and make her his mate in every sense of the word, both physically and spiritually his forever….

 

He glanced toward the young woman and her adopted son and watched the way the fire-light reflected off of her raven locks. Yes, that was what he wanted to do, but something told him that she wasn't ready for that yet. No, he might have been sure of what he felt but Kagome needed more time. In fact he doubted that their relationship would move forward at all until everything with Kikyou was resolved.

 

He let himself think about the undead miko for a moment and he sighed. Kikyou…the sound of her name still brought on so many mixed feelings and emotions, betrayal, duty, hate, fear…love? Inuyasha supposed that if he'd never met Kagome, or never been given the precious gift of being bound to her soul to soul, he would have thought that the feelings he had for Kikyou were love. But the feelings he had for Kagome were so much stronger than anything he'd ever felt for her incarnation.

 

He'd been telling the truth when he'd told Kagome that she was the reason he took his next breath. But even with all of these strong feelings he had for Kagome, the thought of Kikyou dying because of his relationship with her made his heart twist. He knew he'd made his choice, but Kami-sama he wished there was a way to save them both. But how could there be when on the most basic level they were the same person…

 

It hit him suddenly like a towering wave of icy water: Kikyou would have to be put to rest completely so that Kagome could be born in the future.

 

“Fuck!” The blade he'd been handling slipped and embedded itself in his palm with the ease of a warm knife in butter and he cursed again although apart of him was marveling at how sharp he'd managed to get the blade.

 

“Okaa-chan! You're bleeding!” Shippou's distressed cry had Inuyasha wrenching around and flying to her side. Kagome sat with one hand cradling the other as bright drops of crimson fell onto the book she'd been teaching Shippou from. He reached out to grasp her hand with his own injured hand and her dazed eyes looked up at him. Their blood ran together and dripped off the ends of her fingers, leaving darker stains in the book with each splash.

 

“You're bleeding too.” She told him as he pulled her body into his lap so he could apply pressure to both their wounds. Inuyasha wasn't very worried about his own, because he could feel it already beginning to heal, but Kagome's hand was badly hurt.

 

“Go fucking find Miroku and Sango! Kagome's going to need more help than I can give her!” He yelled at the frightened kit, too distraught to care that the fox child was upset.

 

“I'm so fucking stupid! If I had of been paying attention this wouldn't have happened!” He pressed her face into the crook of his neck with his injured hand and rocked back and forth. The smell of her blood was turning his stomach and he had to fight down the bile that was rising in the back of his throat. He didn't even know he was whimpering until Kagome struggled to sit up and wrap her good arm around his shoulders.

 

“Shh…it's not your fault…it doesn't hurt that much anyway.” She tried to reassure him, accidentally leaving bloody streaks down his cheek as her fingers grazed his face. But he knew she was in a lot of pain even though she said she wasn't. He could feel it through her pain hazy thoughts and see it in the say her lips trembled. He pulled her closer and continued running his hand over her hair with one hand and applying pressure to her injury with the other; unmindful of the bloody mess he was creating for their friends to find.

 

The sound of running feet reached his ears but he didn't turn to greet his panicky friends, didn't even acknowledge that they were there; Inuyasha was helpless to pay attention to anything but Kagome.

 

“Inuyasha? Kagome-chan?” Sango hurried into the dimly lit room, fighting down the worry Shippou's terrified yelling had given birth to in her heart. She smelled the blood first then caught sight of the vast amounts of it covering her friends. It was on the floor too and on one of Shippou's books.

 

“Dear Buddha, what happened here?” Miroku asked as he pushed into the door behind her. By the sound of his voice he was just as appalled as she was. Sango moved closer and finally noticed her sword where it lay by the fire-light. The dark stain on the blade made her heart leap, just what had happened here?

 

“I wasn't paying attention to what I was doing while sharpening your sword. I ended up cutting myself pretty badly on the palm and because of this fucking spell Kagome's mirroring my wounds. I-I-I don't…She's been bleeding badly…” It was the first time Inuyasha had acknowledged that any of them were there, and the guilt and pain he was feeling could clearly be heard in his voice. Sango gave Miroku curt instructions to fetch Kagome's first-aid kit and told Shippou sternly that Kagome wasn't going to die and to bring her sewing bag. After handing out everyone's instructions, Sango knelt beside the water Miroku had brought with him and briskly scrubbed her hands, then she slowly approached Inuyasha's still rocking form. She knew that when a male youkai felt that his mate was threatened and in pain the natural reaction was to lash out so she made no sudden movements. Inuyasha growled deeply but let her approach.

 

“It's taking you fucking long enough. I think she's almost stopped bleeding now.” He opened up his clenched hand so that Sango could see the injury. She tried to keep an impassive face, but the cut stretched from the younger girl's first finger and down across her palm toward her wrist.

 

“Kagome-chan, I'm going to have to touch it, okay, because I have to know how deep it is. This is going to hurt but I have to do it.” She looked into the pain filled eyes of her friend to make sure the girl understood. Without giving Inuyasha a glance Sango gently probed the wound and found to her relief that while she was going to have to sew the wound up, it wasn't deep enough to have damaged any of Kagome's nerves. Kagome drew in a shuttering breath and Inuyasha's growl went high for a moment in what could only be a whine. Sango would have smiled if she wasn't dreading the painful process that was about to start.

 

Miroku appeared with Kagome's medical bag and Sano sent him to sterilize one of her own sewing needles in the fire. To keep Shippou busy she ordered the kit to light ever candle he could find so that she would have plenty of light to see what she was doing.

 

“Okay, Inuyasha I'm going to have to stitch up this cut a little and because I don't have any numbing herbs it's going to be painful.” Sango took the needle from Miroku and focused on threading it as Shippou ran around lighting all the candles with his fox-fire. Inuyasha pulled Kagome closer at Sango's words and fought a losing battle with his instincts. Part of him knew that Sango would never purposely hurt Kagome and that anything she did was definitely needful, but a growing part of him didn't want anyone else touching his mate.

 

“No!” He growled out when Sango reached for Kagome's injured palm. He tucked the girl closer and scooted away from their friend.

 

“But Inuyasha! I have to close up the wound! It's very dangerous for her to go around with an open wound!” Sango tried to reason with him. He just growled a warning at her to stay back.

 

“Inuyasha, you have to let her help me. The bleedings stopped, and the pain can't get any worse.” Kagome used her uninjured hand to push away slightly from the hanyou and turned in his lap so that she was facing Sango. Her hand trembled as she held it out, palm up. Inuyasha stiffened behind her and took in a deep breath. His more rational side finally won and he reached out to secure one arm around her waist and used his already healed hand to hold Kagome's shaking hand still for Sango.

 

“Do it quickly.” He ordered through clenched teeth as Sango's needle descended.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The sound of a light drizzle on the thatch roof woke Kagome. It was such a different sound than rain on tin or tiles that she couldn't help but lay there and listen to the unique pattern. She could tell without opening her eyes that it wasn't quite sunrise yet. Kagome mused that maybe she'd spent too much time in this era if she could predict the time of day without opening her eyes but the thought was more amusing to her than anything else. She moved to stretch, but found that she couldn't move her arms. Something or someone was holding her tightly and she suddenly became aware that the pillow her head was resting against was breathing.

 

“I know you're awake.” A sleep roughened voice whispered into her ear, “How's your hand?” For a moment she was confused, then the memory of last night came back to her. As if it were trying to help jog her memory her hand started to throb.

 

“It's okay…it hurts a little bit but not like last night.” Kagome answered, finally opening her eyes. She glanced down at her bandaged hand and wondered how long it would be before she'd be able to use her bow again.

 

“Don't even think about rushing it Kagome.” Inuyasha tightened his hold on her for a moment then released her so that she could slide out of his lap. Kagome straightened her shirt and looked around to locate the rest of their party. Shippou was still sleeping in the corner wrapped in her sleeping bag, but Miroku and Sango were no where to be found. She knew they had been up and gone for a while because what was left of breakfast was still bubbling over the fire.

 

“Where are the others?” She asked as she went about trying to fix herself some food with only one good hand.

 

`Okay, I want to know who up there hates me so much? First my sight, now the use of one of my hands…is this `see how many ways we can cripple Kagome' month or something?'

 

“Sango and Miroku went out early this morning to finish getting what they bartered for last night. It seems that yesterday they talked to someone that pointed them in the right direction for the youkai we've been hunting, so they'll need some supplies before they sit out today.” He moved over to the fire and helped her dish some food up without comment or complaint. Kagome accepted his help because she knew Inuyasha still felt guilt over what had happened.

 

“What do you mean they? Aren't we going with them?” She asked as he handed her the plate and a pair of chop sticks. Inuyasha sat back and prepared himself for the argument that he knew was coming. Kagome wasn't going to like what he was about to say, but it had already been decided and was for her own good anyway.

 

“Sango and the monk are going to go deal with the youkai. From what I can tell it's only a minor one and shouldn't give them any trouble. You, Shippou and I are going back to Kaede's village so that she can take a look at your hand.”

 

“But they need us!” She argued, almost dropping her utensils.

 

“No, they don't. Miroku will be able to at least sense the shard even if he can't see it and Sango was trained to kill this kind of youkai. And they've worked alone without us before. Everything's been decided already so don't bother arguing!” She glared at him but didn't say anything else and Inuyasha was content to let her brood it over.

 

“We're back!” Sango called as she came through the doorway, she smiled in relief when she saw that Kagome was up and eating, “How's your hand this morning, Kagome-chan? No pulling or sharp pain?” The older girl knelt beside the young miko and reached for her injured palm.

 

“It's throbbing a little bit, but it's nothing that some numbing herbs or a few pain pills from my era won't fix.” Kagome let the other girl pull her hand up into the light so that she could get a closer look.

 

“The bandages need to be changed after you finish eating, I'd like to see it then, I need to check for infection.” Sango let Kagome's hand fall gently back into her lap before turning to Inuyasha.

 

“Everything's ready. Miroku's loading our half of the supplies on Kirara right now and I brought enough for your return journey in with me.” She indicated the bags she'd left beside the door, “We'll be leaving in a few minutes.”

 

“Thanks.” Inuyasha grunted, “Keep the monk out of trouble and watch your back.” In his own gruff way he was expressing concern for his friends, and Sango, who had known him long enough to know this, nodded her head.

 

“I don't like the idea of the two of you going off alone!” Kagome spoke up from where she'd been quietly finishing her breakfast. Inuyasha groaned something that sounded like `Here we fucking go again' under his breath and Sango looked at Kagome in surprise.

 

“Why Kagome-chan? Houshi-sama and I have gone off alone to slay youkai before, and this one is only a minor youkai that probably doesn't even have a humanoid form.”

 

“But it's just…” Kagome paused a moment, trying to find the right words to express her misgivings, “We've been separating a lot recently…and it just feels like we're growing apart…” These people were her family, a strange, rag-tag bunch to be sure, but Kagome was afraid of losing the closeness she'd had with them for two years.

 

“Don't be stupid bitch; we have to collect as many shards as we can while Naraku is dormant.” Inuyasha's tone wasn't as harsh as it could have been, but Kagome still felt hurt none the less.

 

“I know that! I just miss them! They're the only family I have here!” She turned her back to her mate and wrapper her arms around the other woman's neck. Sango returned her hug with a heartfelt one of her own.

 

“Don't worry Kagome-chan. We'll kill this youkai and be back at Kaede's before you even start to miss us,” and in a quieter whisper she added, “Plus I think you and Inuyasha need some time to yourselves to work some things out.” Kagome blushed as she moved away and sat back on her heels.

 

“Take care of yourselves okay! And tell Miroku that he'd better keep his hands to himself.” Kagome sniffed but didn't cry, after all, she'd only be away from her friends for a few days. Sango stood up and nodded to Inuyasha before going over to pat the still sleeping Shippou on the head, then she backed out of the hut with a wave and a smile. A few minutes later the couple heard the sound of Kirara flying off. They sat in silence for a few moments before Kagome felt Inuyasha shift behind her. She still didn't turn toward him, but she did allow him to pull her into his lap.

 

“You have me too, you know.” His warm breath tickled the skin behind her ear and she suppressed the urge to relax against him.

 

“I know I have you Inuyasha…I just miss the others sometimes…It's so hard to deal with all the changes that are coming our way right now…and I just…I don't know…I guess I'm afraid of more change.”

 

“Keh.”

 

“Please try to at least understand what I'm trying to tell you! My whole life has been thrown on its ear in the last month and a half! I've been blinded, kidnapped, had my soul tied for all eternity, which if you haven't figured it out yet is a long time, to man who just happened to have been in love with me in one of my previous lives, and last but not least, my tie to him is killing the woman he used to love…again…for the second time! Pardon me if I feel as if I need some support from my friends!” She turned in his lap so that she could look into his eyes but the dim light of the hut kept his amber orbs hidden from her sight.

 

“You act as if everything in you life is rotten! At least you're alive! And you can see again!” Unspoken between them was his forth point.

 

`At least I realized that I love you, and I know you love me, even if you can't say those words yet.'

 

“I'm not trying to say that all the changes have been bad! I…I'm just feeling overwhelmed! I'm already living a strange, warped, fairy-tale kind of life, and it keeps getting more confusing!” She fought back the tears with an iron will. She would not cry!

 

“But it doesn't have to be so confusing, you just think too much about it all! Stop worrying, I've already promised to take care of you!” She could feel how tired he was of her worrying over the future in every fiber of her being, and Kagome realized anew just how hard all of this changes must have been on him too. Inuyasha needed her to be strong right now so that he'd have someone to lean on too.

 

“I know I think too much. I'm sorry Inuyasha…I really don't think all the changes have been bad.” She reached up and touched his cheek with the tips of her fingers and brushed some of his long hair out of his face.

 

“So you don't think all the changes have been bad…” He coaxed her into leaning back against him and wrapped his arms around her middle. Kagome moved her head to the side so that he could rest his forehead on her shoulder.

 

“No they haven't, but it's all so sudden…and you calling me stupid doesn't help.”

 

“I didn't mean it.” He nuzzled the side of her neck in apology. Kagome reached up and found one of his triangular ears to rub, “I never mean it when I say things like that.”

 

“I know.”

 

“And I lo—“

 

“I know, Inuyasha, and I… this time I believe you with my whole heart.” She turned in his lap and pressed a kiss to his surprised lips before burying her head into his shoulder.

 

`The world through my eyes has always been complicated, Inuyasha…but it's always been you…always you…that I loved…'

 

 

 

T.B.C

 

 

YAY!!!

 

I finally put out a chapter!!

 

Thank you all for being so paitent…it's almost inhuman, how nice you've all been…but RL for me has been a mess…

 

I've been sick…my Dad's been the Hospital twice…my brother graduated from high school…my mother is still morning her father and needs my help…and then…

 

Erg…lets just say that it's been a hard few months…

 

But I'm back! And you have a new chapter to feast on!

 

Oh, and I'm sure you've all noticed that the things I promised in this chapter didn't happen…but they will! In the next chapter!

 

OH AND JUST INCASE YOU DIDN'T NOTICE THIS MONTH IS TWTHE'S BIRTHDAY MONTH!! IT'S A YEAR OLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *hands out cake for everyone* YAY!!!!