InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Unleashed Desires ❯ Training part one ( Chapter 4 )

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or its characters; I'm simply borrowing them for my own wicked entertainment.

AN: Took long. I know. First I had an internet crash down and then my PC died. Had to rewrite the chap + Was working in July.

 

THANKS to All who reviewed and SPECIAL THANKS to my BETAREADER Pawright for the great work.

 

 

The Training part one

 

 

“You have to concentrate”, came the tireless voice of Kikyou. “Your powers have great potency. When used properly, Naraku can not possibly win. So move your lazy bones and try harder. In battle, there will be neither place for mistakes, nor failure. This can make the difference between death and survival for all of us. I hope you now know what burden is laid upon your shoulders.”

 

“I know now that”, the younger miko murmured more to herself than to the corpse in front of her. Lowering her voice further, she continued under her breath: “It's easy for you to say this. Being dead, I bet you don't feel tired either way.”

 

While the others were resting, her training continued. If not with Kikyou, then with Sango. The Taijiya took it upon herself to teach her some defence stances. She reasoned that it could be useful in combat. So while she and Sango jumped around, panting from the exercise, Kikyou and Inuyasha walked and talked. It was clear to the young girl that they were getting closer. Their love for each other, violated so long ago, was not annihilated. Its fires of it blazing up once more. This, though it saddened her, was something she had expected when she had made the proposal for Kikyou to join the troop. Her hope, of being more to Inuyasha than his friend, faded away like snow in the spring melted by the growing sun.

 

Her thoughts were once again interrupted by Kikyou. “Good. Now we should focus on your sacred powers. As of yet, you can use them only by firing arrows. However, there is much more you can do with them.”

 

“Huh? What do you mean by `much more'?” Kagome was confused. Kaede had mentioned something similar to her some time ago. But there had been no time for the old woman to teach her some of the techniques she had referred to. With the jittery hanyou always on her heels, the time for learning was cut short. Kaede at least, had taught her the use of healing herbs but that's all.

 

“You can make a barrier as I do for example. This is the way to protect yourself from any intrusion, creating a save haven for you and others within it. No youkai, no evil will be able to break through it. Naturally, this barrier will drain your powers, so you won't be able to hold it for too long.” Kikyou said through gritted teeth. She didn't like to help the girl, but there was no way around it. The prodding feeling that Kagome's help would be needed couldn't be easily dispelled.

 

“But yours held for a pretty long time.” Kagome said.

 

“Yes, but that one was not entirely made by my powers. I received support from the soul stealers. Alone, I can't sustain it for a long time. You see, I made one, which would allow noone to pass through it. How you managed to get to me is beyond my understanding.” Kikyou explained further.

 

“It may be because I'm your reincarnation. Therefore my soul was recognized by it as a part of you and it let me pass.”

 

“Yes that could be. Now let us begin, we aren't here to talk about unimportant matters.”

 

“What do I have to do?” Kagome wanted to know.

 

“Focus your power, call for it. It is there, dormant under the surface. In times of need, you used it with such vehemence even Naraku was surprised by its formidable force. We have to roust them from their long sleep. Let's try it!” Kikyou urged the young miko standing in front of her on.

 

For the first time after her resurrection, Kikyou's eyes sparkled with anticipation, the frigid coffee-coloured orbs now holding this emotion seemed to be more of the living realm than at any time before. Her heart warmed in the presence of the young girl, the younger one oblivious to the effect she had on the older one. Her giving nature dispelled the cold from Kikyou's frozen organ heart. The more time she spent with her, the more thawed the icicle in her chest. Sometimes it felt like she was alive, not simply a walking corpse.

 

`Her powers, without a boubt, are astonishing. What I'm feeling now is like standing in the rays of the sun after a long time spent in darkness, the emotions both exhilarating and blinding. Her powers are surpassing mine by miles. She does not know yet. Pity that this power hasn't been cherished for so long. I have to put up with this now.' Kikyou was torn between contentment and hatred towards her reincarnation.

 

Kagome closed her eyes and did what was asked of her. However, she didn't know, how to call upon her power so nothing happened. Minutes passed and then some more. Nothing. Kikyou grew impatient. She knew this would not change, unless she explained how the powers Kagome held hidden essentially worked.

 

`It seems she wasn't trained in any way. This will be strenuous. I will have to start with the basics of the miko training. I had hoped that she already knew at least a bit.' An audible sigh left her lungs, causing Kagome to peek up at her sensei, her gaze questioning at the indication of `this is going to be a very long day.'

 

“Well, I see we have to start with the fundamentals. I had rather hoped you would know them already. I see my hope was in vain.”

 

“What do you mean? What fundaments?”

 

“The first step will be meditation. This will pave the way for your powers to be summoned when you call. With some training, you'll be able to erect a barrier or a shield of your energy.” Kikyou spoke continued in her mind. `Maybe much more. How I envy your caring nature, the blood pulsing in your veins.' Kikyou had changed a lot. She had started to long after a time when her heart would speed up when she was happy or in danger. Alas, it was gone. She was dead, the walking corpse without signs of life, without a soul.

 

The far-away look in her eyes, the sad lines adoring her otherwise cold features, left Kagome uneasy. “What's wrong? Is something bothering you, Kikyou?”

 

“No, there is nothing. We should start now with the meditations. Better sit comfortably.” As she noticed the slight inclination of Kagome's head, the trained miko continued on. “Now, relax. Listen to the sounds of the forest and flow with them. Clear your mind. Tink of nothing, no worries only peace.” Kagome did what was asked of her. She felt like she was levitating on the spot she previously occupied. A strange warm light enveloped her. All her concerns vanished and a pink glow formed around her body. Kikyou's jaw hung open in quiet astonishment. This was unexpected. Never would she have assumed that this would happen so rapidly. The girl's progress was more than satisfactory. At this rate, it wouldn't take long and she would be at Kikyou's own level of control.

 

“Good,” she continued, “now search for the place where your power comes from. Only call for it and concentrate so they rise only a little.” Kagome followed her instructions and soon the pinkish aura around her intensified. She spotted the place in her mind. It was like her heart was humming with the pink energy.

 

Her eyes, the colour of deep blue sea, snapped open. “I have it, I now know where the source of my power is! I made it.” The zealous chirping of Kagome let Kikyou tighten her jaw.

 

This enthusiastic young woman managed to make Kikyou feel nearer a true living being than she could remember in a long time. This loquacious human girl would warm anybody, her smile comparable to the sun streaming into a musty dim room, bringing light and reach air with it. There was now way she could resist the call of contentment, but for a second she fought against it. She would not let her reincarnation win.

 

“Fine, you should repeat the exercise for a couple more times.” Kikyou stated and shot the girl a hateful glare.

 

Concentrating anew, Kagome did as she was told. In less then two hours, she could call upon her powers within mere seconds, the pinkish aura entwining her, rising or subsiding whenever she wished. This was greater progress than Kikyou dared to expect.

 

“That is enough for today.” Kikyou spoke. “The training will be continued tomorrow. You did well.” Her words were rather cold as she said this. Kikyou, though her loathing tried to resurface, had to praise the girl. No matter that she hated her, she could not resist these feelings of kindness when she was in immediate contact with her.

 

Nodding in thanks, Kagome stood up from her mossy seat. The sun touched the tips of the hills, leaving only the last stray rays before it disappeared to let the moon take over the reign of the sky. Stretching, she was sure to take the bath she had been dreaming about for a long time. There was grim and sweat from the day hike and the exertion she was put through, making her nasty and unclean. A bath was the best way to relax, being seated in the steaming water and washing all the stress away. Sango, however, had other plans for her.

 

“Kagome-chan, I was thinking and came to the conclusion that you should learn some offensive stances as well. More basics from hand to hand fighting and that of swordsmanship as well.” Sango approached the stunned girl in front of her. She was more of a sister than a friend to her. Should they be in battle and the fight turned fiercer than they counted on, she would need it. If the enemy was too near for her arrows, then she would be able to protect herself. There was the possibility that they all would be too busy to protect Kagome. Should this be the case, her being harmed was more a certainty than a possibility.

 

“Can't it wait till tomorrow Sango-chan?” She said with a groggy voice. Just the idea of a gruelling hour spent jumping made her knees buckle. The happy thoughts of the hot bubbling water were quickly replaced with the images of panting attempts to catch her breath.

 

“Iie, we'll start now, the sooner the better. Besides, Naraku could attack any moment. I don't think that scheming bastard would play fair. You should be prepared should this be the case. When he attacks, the advantage will be ours.” Sango reasoned. “He considers you weak. You will be the secret weapon against the devious hanyou.” With a mischievous grin, Sango moved to her fighting stance, motioning for Kagome to do the same.

 

After a while, there were two staggering women, the area meanwhile too dark for them to keep on going.

 

“This was a perfect workout, don't you think, Kagome-chan?” Sango asked, satisfaction written clearly in her feminine features. Her cheeks were still rosy from the blood high on them.

 

Kagome inwardly groaned in disapproval. Every inch of her body ached. She was sure she would walk funny with the muscle ache that would be there for the next few days. `What wouldn't I give for a nice rub? Would I ask Miroku, he wouldn't decline. Yes, and the single part, he would pay any attention to, would be my behind.' Sighing in defeat, she turned to Sango.

 

“What about a bath?” Kagome asked.

 

“Hn, great idea. Inuyasha, do you know where it is?”

 

Inuyasha, sitting on his perch, regarded the demon slayer silently for a moment, before he gave her the answer she so eagerly wanted.

 

“There,” he pointed into the direction where the mountains rose to the horizon, “a five minute walk from here is a pond. If you go that way and then follow the sound of water running down a small stream, you should easily find it.”

 

“Thank you!” The miko stood once more at the side of her friend, her bathing supplies tucked under her arm.

 

“Shall we go?” Kagome asked peeking at Kikyou in silent question if she would join them. When she shook her head no, the two girls vanished in the darkness, the path clearly visible for them as it was near the harvest moon, the darkness currently pierced with just enough light for them to see where they were going, avoiding boulders and fallen trees as the silhouettes were visible for them. Soon the song of trickling water reached their ears.

 

 

Kagome and Sango helped each other with cleaning their bodies and washing their hair. Unaware of a pair of uninvited eyes spying on them from the bushes.

 

The sound of a limb braking interrupted the silence, startling the girls in the onsen. Sango grabbed her giant boomerang and shouted: “Come out of hiding, disturber, and face the consequences!”

 

Miroku tried to evaporate from the area as fast as he could. However, the Taijiya was faster going ashore of the pond wtih a towel wrapped around her slender body. The monk looked at her sheepishly and raised his hands in an apologetic manner.

 

“This is not what you think my dear Sango! I was only concerned for your safety. Never have I imagined to come so near.” Grinning, the letch hoped she would believe the tale and let him escape wtih only a glare for punishment. How far from truth he was became clear as her boomerang collided with his head, a nice bump appearing where it hit. Closing his lids, he drifted off into an unwanted early sleep.

 

“I have to call for Kirara. The letch won't awake so soon.” Holding her wrist, Sango peeked up at Kagome with a `the blow was strong enough' look and nodded in satisfaction.

 

Sighing, regarding Miroku's inert body, Kagome added. “He'll never learn, will he? What I wonder about is that Inuyasha didn't stop him. He always has before.” Shrugging her shoulders, Sango didn't know what to say.

 

“Let us return so we can ask him.” Sango remarked.

 

Both girls walked the path that they had taken, which lead them back to camp. Sango decided against yelling for Kirara, afraid of Inuyasha appearing with his sword drawn, prepared to slaughter the non-existent enemy and then cursing up hill and down dale about them making enough racket to attract potential enemies. She could collect the monk later.

 

When the girls arrived at the campsite, Inuyasha was nowhere to be found nor was the older miko. Sango shot Kagome a sympathetic look.

 

“Don't worry about me, Sango-chan. Believe it or not, I saw this coming and prepared for it. It still hurts, but there is nothing I can do about it. Now we know why Miroku was spying on us.” Kagome's face was hidden behind the curtain of her long hair, her chin pointing to the grass under her feet.

 

“Are you sure? I mean, it must be terrible for you to see him with her.”

 

Sighing, Kagome decided to tell her friend everything. This was the perfect chance. Inuyasha's attentive ears were not there and the monk slept at the hot spring, so she was certain nobody would listen to their conversation.

 

“I will tell you all about my feelings and what is bothering me. It will be difficult for me, however.” Nodding, Sango gave Kagome the strength she was looking for, before she went on with her story. “What I think is that Inuyasha never loved me. Or better to say, never loved me as Kagome. His feelings were stirred in him only because I am so similar to Kikyou. Though not our characters, but our features are alike. Once he tried to kiss me. However, his look was disconcerted and I was sure that Kikyou was on his mind, so I stopped him. If we were together, he wouldn't love me, but her reflection he would see in me. This way, I know, I would always feel as second best. You know something like `if I can't have Kikyou, then at least I'll have Kagome'. I would never be happy. Maybe, it is better this way, so I won't stand in the way of their happiness. Even if it means I'll be alone. One day, perhaps, I'll find someone who will love me and I'll be ready to return the feelings.” Tears were streaming in torrents down her pale cheeks. Hiccupping, she tried to stop the tears from falling further.

 

Sango knew her friend was suffering greatly, but admired her selflessness. Kagome was right. Having a man who doesn't really love you can be worse than being alone.

“I don't know what to say.”

 

“It's ok, really. I'll be fine. Thank you for listening. All I need is time.”

 

With that, Kagome turned to spread out her sleeping bag. Shippou was curled beside Kirara, who had transformed to her fighting form to keep the kitsune warm. Kagome carefully picked him up and moved him to her sleeping bag. Shippou was like her own child. They were put through so much together, and he undoubtedly held a great part of her heart. She laid down beside him, careful not to jostle him.

 

“Will you gather Miroku?”

 

“Yes, I should. I'll be back soon. Come on Kirara.”

 

`Ah, I wonder what Kouga and Ayame are doing. Nearly ten days had passed and no sign of them yet. I hope they are all right.' Kagome's thoughts wandered to the ookamis she had became so attached to. Ayame, first reserved, turned out to be a great support to the female part of the group. Her prompt quips silenced more than one stupid remark from Miroku or Kouga.

 

Sango arrived with Miroku spread across Kirara's back, interrupting her musings. The nasty lump on his head told her that Sango didn't bother herself to adjust the strength of her hit as she “lulled” the monk to sleep. By the grin adorning his handsome face, even his dreams weren't rid of his wanton thoughts.

 

Sango was more than willing to kick Miroku, rousting him from his conspicuously peaceful slumber. She was still seething with anger. Her body language betrayed her intentions. Every muscle tensed, the conversation wouldn't be pleasant for the pervert splayed in front of her. Kagome had to stop her or they would be in serious need for some rest. Miroku would end up with a concussion for sure, screaming `please don't move me or my head will blow up into oblivion' and Inuyasha would be swearing in anger for the further delay, ending with Kagome sitting him, which would worsen his already grumpy mood. The easiest way to avoid it was to prevent Sango's not so friendly plans.

 

“Let him be, Sango-chan. It isn't worth it to waste your energy on putting up with Miroku. Besides, Inuyasha would blow up if we forced him to stay here till Miroku is cured from your `gentle' handling.” While accentuating the word gentle, she shot the slayer a knowing look from her eyes. Her flawless skin gleamed in the red flames from the fire. She readied herself for the nights rest. “Good night Sango-chan.” Wishing her friend sweet dreams she could only hope Miroku would not find Sango's rear in his dreams.

 

“Won't you wait for Inuyasha's return?” Sango asked.

 

“No. I won't wait for him. He will return. Besides, Kikyou is with him.” No matter how hard she tried, Kagome couldn't extinguish the pang of sorrow from the uttered words, only holding the tears back from falling by the strength of her will. She had grieved enough. It was she, who had made this proposition; well aware of the fact that Inuyasha would turn his back on her; accordingly becoming closer to Kikyou. What was done was done. There were no regrets towards her actions; this she told herself every single time her tormented soul hollered accusations at her for what she had done.

 

The result of Naraku's soon destruction was the possibility for Miroku staying in the world of the living. Contrariwise, his death was inevitable due to his curse. He couldn't live a happy long life. Lying down, she cuddled Shippou to her slender chest, the kitsune sighing in pure bliss at the permeating comfort of her body-heat. To the sensitive youkai-nose she smelled nice, like the early morning of a spring-day. Spooning the kit into her protective embrace, she drifted off to sleep.

 

 

When she awoke, Kikyou and Inuyasha were there. She didn't know at what time they had arrived. Kikyou puttered around the fire, while the inu-hanyou sat in the tree on the edge of the dell they had spent the night in, being obviously on guard the whole night. Kagome remembered occasions when she awoke during the night frantically looking around for him only to spot him in a nearby tree. His features had been calm and peaceful. She had thought he had been deep in slumber. The usual tensions of his body had been gone. Never would she have guessed he had been on the highest alert despite his closed golden eyes. His hearing and other senses working perfectly without the intervention of their owner. His instincts taking over when he dozed off. She had tried visiting the bushes without disturbing him. Inuyasha had been instantly awake the second he had noticed movement under him. He had jumped in front of her, startling the half-asleep miko. After some coarse invectives, he had murmured to her to hurry up, or she would be sleepy the next day and he didn't want to put up with her foul mood.

 

At her recall of the past, a feeble smile crept upon her face. That was it, the feeling of being protected when she was near him. It was ridiculous to feel safe in the warring states era of Japan, where not even a hut was considered secure, not to mention camping outdoors. Only thieves and outlaws did so. The group she travelled with were forced to do so and having a hanyou with them, it was better to avoid villages and the people occupying them. Not that they were unwelcome. The rumour that preceded them made them more than accepted in the settlements they passed. Inuyasha, however, was not too fond of the idea of being around humans. No wonder he felt this way. When he had been a small child, the humans in the yamen where he had lived had cast him out for what he was. No one would play with him, nor would there be kind words for him. The only emotions he had learned from the humans in his early years were scorn, hatred, disdain and disgust with his kind. Yes, he was neither human, nor demon, but this shouldn't have stigmatized him as tainted for the rest of his life. As they passed more ningens changed their opinions after the haphazard group helped them to get rid of the problems which plagued them. That didn't mean it quelled the uneasiness in Inuyasha's heart where humans were concerned. He simple refused to trust them and so the group did what they could to avoid main roads, travelling across the wildness as much as possible. The amazing thing was that Kagome never felt endangered, barring the times they were attacked by a monster. The hanyou did a fine job in giving her the security she needed to rest peacefully.

 

Kagome, who noticed Sango being awake, adjourned her ponderings about the past. Kagome rubbed her dizzy eyes with her balled fists, dispelling the cloudiness from the huge blue pools of twirling emotions. She was definitely not a morning person. She hated to stand up and leave the warmth of her sleeping bag behind. The last piece of comfort was gone in the instant Inuyasha noticed that she was on her feet. It meant he would goad her and the others to hurry up, impatiently wanting to be on his way after the Shikon no Kakera. In the past few days, however, he had changed a lot. With Kikyou around, he never complained about the fact that the journey was put aside for battle preparations. This had become the most needed task at hand. Kagome made a lot of progress the last day she spent with her former incarnation. The training seemed to be necessary for her survival in this hard time. What if the others would not live through the oncoming contest? What if he would not be there to protect her? What then? She had to learn to take care of herself and not depend on the others to protect her. She was a miko with enough power to make it, to live on should something happen to him or her other companions.

 

The older miko standing above her, her cold brown eyes trained upon her seated form, interrupted her chain of thought.

 

“We should start the training soon if you are to make some progress. The first task I planned for today is the archery training. Then later in the afternoon we can continue with raising barriers, also focusing on the control over your powers.”

 

Nodding, Kagome gave her silent consent for what she was supposed to do. Protecting herself sounded tempting as she realized what it meant. She would not need anyone to save her sorry behind should she ever be in danger. The idea of a potential attacker getting his ass kicked crept into her mind and a small smile twitched at the corners of her lips.

 

The day started as the previous one. At first, they had breakfast except for Kikyou who neither bathed nor ate. It was clear she wasn't a living onna any more, her heart not beating in her chest. Not dead, not alive. An unfortunate creature trapped between worlds, never finding the realm she belonged to. She was an honourable miko. Kagome's sensei now. She was thankful for her help and the lessons she gave her, thus making her understand the powers that were hidden within her, better than ever before. Kikyou prepared her to use them to the fullest extend even though most of the power still lay dormant and wouldn't be discovered any time soon. Kikyou could feel them but she was not able to bring them out of their shell. The power was greater than anything the older miko had ever experienced, hindering her from drawing them to the outside. What if Kagome lost control over them? It would end in a disaster.

 

The training was arduous. She spent nearly the whole day firing arrows, then meditating and as her tasks ended, she received private lessons from Sango. She progressed faster than expected from both teachers and Sango was proud of her after a sweat-drenching day.

 

The evening was very nice. The faint light from the stars illuminated the inky canopy above the resting group. Kagome, though her skills improved greatly that day, hoped for some time to spent alone with her thoughts, so she could ponder what was to happen and how things would be after they defeated Naraku, the paltry hanyou. Unfortunately, her time was cut short.

 

The older priestess had decided that she would speak with the young miko to make it clear that Inuyasha was hers and she would be the only one to decide what would happen to him. After years spent in solitude, she didn't want to be left alone. The more time Kikyou spent around the animated girl the clearer it became that Kagome could attract the attention of any male, Inuyasha included. That was what Kikyou assumed.

 

“I need to speak with you.” Motioning with her head to follow her, Kikyou turned towards the trees.

 

 

`Sango did a fine job, I'll walk funny for several days. Ghah! My dignity will suffer greatly,' thought Kagome.

 

The forest around them became denser. Never before was she this far from the others, nonetheless with someone considered once an enemy, one who had tried to kill her in the past. She was not sure if she could trust the miko this far. She followed the woman, Kikyou's long hair swaying in front of her as a light breeze danced through the tips of the trees. The cool night air and the stars above her made the most romantic sight she had ever come upon. Though Kagome was for from relaxed, she trusted Kikyou enough to enjoy the surroundings.

 

`I could never explain to my family why I love the woods and this era so much. It is because you can still see the stars here, smell the fresh air and hear the songs of nightingales when the first rays of the rising sun meet the beads of dew upon the leaves. The air after a boisterous storm is filled with the freshness of blooming flowers. In my time, such sights are lost forever and the lives of the cities' occupants are filled with haste.' As Kikyou stopped dead in her tracks, Kagome unceremoniously crashed against her back, causing the older miko to stumble before she caught her balance. She shot Kagome a cold despising glower. Kagome gasped in astonishment. Before her was a little glen, filled with flowers of the most intriguing nature. Some of them she had never heard about, nor had she seen them before. The blooming plants filled the air with a soft fragrance, calming her spirit. She felt more relaxed than she had during the walk.

 

“What is it you wish to speak about?” She could stay like that forever. However, Kikyou wanted something and she was too curious about what bothered the clay corpse enough to take so much effort to bring her this far away from the group.

 

Brown eyes met stormy blue for a brief moment, the pale skin suggesting that death flowed behind her, making it clear she was not of that realm; nor did she belong upon the living ones as her lifeline ended with the mortal wound inflicted upon her so many decades ago. The mirrors of her soul once so warm and carrying, filled with compassion, comprehension and love were now cold, the pools of swirling heat frozen to unmoving emptiness. Kagome brought some life to them but it didn't last for long. Kikyou fought against it and so the cold reigned.

 

Turning her head to the heavens, Kikyou answered what she was asked, making no bones about it. She got straight to what she had on her mind and what she wished to solve.

 

“Inuyasha is mine; do not dare to interfere! What is going on between us is none of your concern. I won't warn you again. The next time you try to tamper, I'll have to kill you.” Kikyou's disdain-filled face turned towards Kagome who had been taken by surprise at her words. She thought the animosity Kikyou held for her had abated.

 

After the initial shock had passed, Kagome was sent into a frenzy. What was this about? She was not doing anything wrong. Taking a breath, Kagome made up her mind to tell the miko how she felt and that she was not afraid of her.

 

“I am not interfering Kikyou. The only thing I did was to teach Inuyasha to respect himself. For me he is perfect. Why do you wish to drag him to hell, Kikyou? How can you be so selfish. He loves you and always did, so why your vengeance?”

 

“Foolish girl, do you think he would ever love you? When he looks at you, he sees me. He'll never be happy at your side; you'll be the ceaseless reminder of his failure more than fifty years ago. Would you do this to him? Put him through such tremendous pain? If you truly love him like you believe you do, you won't.” An ugly sneer marred her cadaverous face. She thought she had won. What she wasn't prepared for was Kagome's reply.

 

“Did you listen to me Kikyou? I just said that I know he does not love me!” Kagome nearly screamed in exasperation. Kikyou's arrogance knew no bounds. “I made my decision long before you even thought of this. I discovered that he would never love me like he did you.” Raising her hands, Kagome intercepted Kikyou's attempts to make a retort.

 

“Let me speak.” Nodding, Kikyou gave her silent consent for her to continue. “I realized long ago I was only a replacement for you. At first, it pained me, but with time, my feelings for Inuyasha changed. He became a dear friend, someone I wished to see happy. I know it won't happen with me at his side, but neither at yours in hell. I love him and won't let you drag him to that place of suffering; neither do I wish it for you. Tell me, how can you be so selfish, Kikyou? If you truly love him, you would do anything to see him happy. Once this is over, I will move on and find a place where I can live in peace. Not immediately after the battle. I'll need some time to look around and have some training. But then I'll wander off. I only hope Inuyasha will move on as well one day and find the love he deserves. There is nothing more I wish, not only for him, but for all the people which are around.”

 

That was not fully the truth. Kagome's heart still desired the hanyou as more than only a friend. `I can't tell her about the torture my heart is suffering, she would never understand. I have to extinguish the romantic feelings towards Inuyasha. For crying out loud, he can't be happy with me.' Holding back her tears she turned her slouched body away from the scrutinizing gaze of the dead miko, knowing she couldn't reveal the truth in her eyes. She was never one who could hide her emotions from others despite how hard she tried.

 

`This is so confusing, I love him and I promised him to stay by his side. I knew from the beginnings that he would never feel for me like I feel for him. Why I don't leave, I'll never know.' Something in Kagome woke up; her sub-consciousness.

 

`You know perfectly well why you stayed. It was your love for him and the hope that one day he would return the feelings you hold for him. Baka! It's time to wake up!'

 

Groaning inwardly, Kagome felt the first stirrings of a headache. Dealing with her random thoughts and her sub-consciousness screaming at her to wake up was too much to bear.

 

`Oh, just shut up. I won't deal with you now! I am a mess. First happy, then sad then angry. The turmoil of feelings and you are giving me a headache.'

 

`Tse, you're just hiding from the truth. It will catch you and bite you in your ass, you'll see!'

 

With this, her inner voice vanished. `Since when did my sub-consciousness get this sarcastic at me?' Huffing, she forgot about her companion. Kikyou shot her a suspicious glance, the question of Kagomes sanity could be discerned from her chocolate orbs.

 

Kikyou first not listening to what she was telling her had to compose herself after she heard what the girl said. She knew Kagome had feeling for Inuyasha, but she had never met somebody as completely selfless as Kagome. She would put her own feelings aside, going so far as to risk her own sanity on the behalf of somebody else finding his. Maybe this was the cause of Kikyou's own fall from grace. Rendered speechless, Kikyou turned to return into the camp, waiting for Kagome to catch up with her. Seeing no reaction to her attempts at leaving, she waited patiently. Obviously the girl was battling with her inner demons, the faraway look confirming what Kikyou assumed.

 

 

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“Kouga, wait! Kouga!” Through heavy panting, an awkward demon called for the leader running in front of a group of wolf demons and big brown wolves. The whirlwind in front of them didn't cease the murderous tempo he had set, making his fellows trail after him in a vain attempt to catch up with him. The ookami-lord forced his pack to train every day since his return. He had promised himself to have a strong army before facing Naraku in the final battle. His underlings, once called weak, were about to change. He needed them to be powerful for the sake of defeating the ratty hanyou and for avenging his dead comrades. He had to do it. It was his duty to take him down. The past few days were hard for them. He let them run for hours, then practice in hand-to-hand combat and later train in weaponry.

 

“Hey, hurry up you lazy asses; we don't have all day to play around.” Rude as ever, he urged them into faster movements.

 

`This is our leader, alright!' Hakkaku thought before he got a hard smack on his head, the growing bump proving the power of the impact.

 

“Ow, what was that for? Damn it!” The wolf demon complained about attention he received from the hands of his captain.

 

“Don't sleep and concentrate on what you are doing or else!” The threat in his words let a shiver run up Hakkaku's spine, a dangerous glint shone in the ookami's cobalt blue eyes.

 

`Ah, not good. He is really serious about this. Is he still trying to impress Kagome?' Shrugging his shoulders, he answered for himself. `Who knows?' Casting the thought away as unimportant for the moment, he turned his full attention to the task at hand.

 

“You have to work harder. We don't have that much time to bring you to full strength, so come on and don't dare to protest. I can't present you to Kagome in your current state. What would she think of me if I came with such incompetents like you are by now. There is no way I'll let you stay like this. We have to be a contributory reinforcement, not bystanders or hindrances in the fight.”

 

In the heat of the moment, he overlooked a red haired, fury-seething female. Her green eyes and pencil thin eyebrows narrowed with temper. A yelp and the laughter of the ones who watched the scene let him remember he had a mate. Obviously, his last comment made her jealous.

 

`Damn, she got my ear good.' Rubbing his sore appendage, he turned to his upset mate with a wide grin plastered on his handsome face, giving the best impression of innocence he could muster.

 

“Kouga, when the hell will you stop dreaming about the human girl? I am your mate and won't let you think about her more than about me. Why have you chosen me, when you are still in such incredible love with the onna? I won't let you dishonour me like this. I'm fed up of you running after her like a love sick pup!” The anger laced in her melodic voice made him flinch in sudden fear; the sight in front of him took him, the brave Kouga, aback. Kouga took a step back instantly as he saw the rage wracking his mate's slight frame. He fully understood the proverb: Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. It was true. Even the mightiest warrior would like a huge distance between him and what was standing in front of him. He had to think of something to calm her down or he would be surely humiliated in front of his army.

 

“Hehe,” his forced laughter interrupted the silence, which ruled the occupants of the meadow. “You know I love you and only you, but I promised to protect her and a lord of my magnificence should never back down on his promise. I just don't want the pack getting hurt because they are unprepared for the fight.” He put his hands in front of him in a calming manner, this had worked for the monk he had observed in his travels.

 

“Better you remember that Kouga, or you can spent your nights other than by my side.” With that, the high and mighty wolf demoness turned on her heels, her long hair trailing around her before she started to sprint from the clearing, leaving a stunned lord and a group of snickering ookamis behind her.

 

`Good, I hope he'll take this lesson seriously. It's not like I'm jealous of Kagome. She is not the one to be blamed. She told him on more than one occasion he should leave her alone.' Sighing, she kept the pace, the white tornado nearing the big cave in the Northern territories, the homeland of her love as well as hers. She would prepare a good meal for the warriors. They all deserved it. It was not that she had to, but she wanted to. Kouga would never degrade her to order her to cook for his pack, he knew better. She was a proud creature. By doing so, he would offend her greatly. She did this, because she liked it. She loved to spoil her mate.

 

 

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“Are you ready?” Kagome's voice echoed through the camp with anticipation lacing the melodious tones leaving her mouth. Her whole body burned with excitment by the thought of the hot steaming water surrounding her slender form, washing away the filth, which covered her alabaster skin. After the whole day spent fighting, running and working out, she was coated in grime and perspiration. The two ingredients mixed making a nice layer of dirt on her body. Her bathing utensils were meanwhile neatly tucked under her right arm. She waited for Sango to get hers before they could head out to the nearby spring.

 

“Hn.” A simple nod was all she received from her friend. Waiting until she came to her, the girls walked down the path, followed by a pair of sparkling violet eyes.

 

`Let's see if I can spy on them and not get caught this time.' The owner of said gaze thought to himself while spinning his lecherous web. Sango, as if she could read his thoughts, turned sharply with a hard look plastered on her beautiful face. Her eyes adorned by the pink lines on her lids, narrowed in suspicion at the monk's facial expression, reflecting his thoughts.

 

“Don't you dare follow us! Should I catch you spying, the pain I'll inflict on you will be excruciating and don't ever think I would let you slip away from the suffering easily.”

 

The monk instantly paled to an interesting hue of white by hearing his beloved woman promise him such a torture. He knew better than to toy with her, seeing her on occasions in a temper, he actually pitied the recipients of her wrath.

 

“Come, he won't follow us this time.” Casting the monk a last threatening glare, Sango turned to the road heading to the hotsprings.

 

The short hike was silent as neither of the girls spoke a word about what happened between Kikyou and Kagome. Sango burned with curiosity, but didn't want to push Kagome, knowing this was her sore point where Inuyasha was concerned.

 

After Kikyou joined the group, Inuyasha who walked the greatest part at the side of his former love left Kagome behind. Kagome felt rejected and alone. Sang couldn't imagine the heartache she was suffering but she knew her best friend and how emotional she was. If she was ready to talk about it, she would. Besides, being silent during the walk Sano could better observe her surroundings. Kagome was of no help for she was distracted by her inner musings about Kikyou. Inuyasha and Kikyou vanished once more to only Kami knew where, so should they be in trouble, the hanyou wouldn't come and save them. Making as little noise as possible was the best way not to attract any unwanted company. Her senses on highest alert the demon slayer hoped she would discover any danger and deter the enemy before he could strike.

 

The pond came quickly into view, the crescent moon reflecting on the water's surface. Stars mirroring in the depths of the currently black water, the nostalgia of the moment letting the younger one of them sigh in woe. She couldn't forget the night spent with him outside as a stone had been bound to his hand by three little monkey demons. He had told her to return inside of the hut so she wouldn't get a cold. She hadn't listened to him. Though he relented grudgingly, she knew him good enough to discern it as concern. This was his way to show he cared. He never learned how to do it properly. Then some memories of sitting with her precious hanyou crossed her tormented mind. The single thought of loosing him to the nether world caused her unbelievable sorrow. She could only hope this would never happen.

 

`How can I prevent it? How? Now you are mute! But when I don't won't to hear anything, then you come and mix up with matters, which are not of your concern. Answer me!' Yelling at her inner voice she hoped it would give her answers, which of course didn't happen. Sighing in defeat, she knew the hidden part of her was as clueless as she was.

 

`Never give up hope your sixth sense will know something you don't know.' Kagome thought sarcastically.

 

`You know you are a loon, don't you? Why mourn about affairs, you cannot change. Is it not for Inuyasha to make the decision? When he wishes to spend the eternity in hell, let him!'

 

`Like I could do this to him. He would go there only for duty. That is not right.'

 

`When will you grow up? Take the pink glasses off of your eyes and face the reality, girl, or a rude awaking will be waiting for you.'

 

With the last sentence, her sub-consciousness quieted for good, leaving the girl in a swirl of thoughts, most of them letting her heart clump with tightness, restricting it like a boa constrictor.

 

Slipping into the water, she hoped once she revealed her story to the woman who was the closest to a real sister that she had, she prayed that Sango would have some advice for her. Seeing the inquisitive look the older girl shot her, she knew it would be only a matter of time before Sango started to bombard her with questions. Better, she told her by herself what happened between her and Kikyou.

 

“So Sango, I guess you're dying from curiosity about what Kikyou wanted from me.”

 

`Good, I don't have to push her for the answers plaguing my mind.' Smiling inwardly, Sango was pleased. She needed to know, to share her consolation with her younger sister. Or to have a good reason for kicking Kikyou's sorry ass. Not letting a single thoughts slip to her features, she gave in to her curiosity. “Hey, of course I'm interested in what was going on! I bet it was not pleasant from the unhappy countenance on your face.”

 

“You can say that.” Clearing her thoughts, she was about to start her story.

 

“Will you tell me or are you going to keep silent. You know I am not skilled in mind reading.” Joked, Sango hoped this would bring her out of her stupor.

 

“I was just trying to line up my thoughts. They are so topsy-turvy that I will end up confusing you.” She let out an air of irritation, this was going to be tough. Speaking about her greatest fears and most painful imaginations was nothing she was thrilled about.

“Kikyou wanted to speak about Inuyasha. What else?” Smirking in self-satire, she went on. “She told me to stay away from him.”

 

“No! She didn't!” The Taijiya's eyes widened in disbelief, she couldn't digest what she had heard. `The whore, this can't be true! How dare she to tell Kagome to leave Inuyasha alone? Is it not his decision with whom he wants to spend his life?' Fuming, Sango was furious at the audacity of the walking corpse. Inuyasha couldn't be this blind, could he? Putting the questions falling on her mind aside, she waited for Kagome to continue.

 

“That is not all. She still desires to drag him to hell. I thought she let it go since the last conversation. Well, she didn't.” Shrugging her shoulders, speaking about it made it look like the script of a bad comedy. In reality, it was not that funny.

 

“And she calls that love, huh? Didn't she miss something in the meaning of it? I mean who would wish to take somebody to hell only to not be alone there?” Curious as to what retort Kagome had made to the hatred-filled corpse, she fell silent. She knew Kagome's temper. She had for sure told Kikyou to mind her own business and from the looks of it, she was not that pleased when they returned.

 

“I told her the same. Not with the same words, but very close to it. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine. Besides what's new with you and Miroku? Did he dare to make a move on you?” Trying to dispel the depressive thoughts she could not gain control over, she changed the topic. She tried to distract Sango from the matter. The instant the question dawned on Sango, she turned a brilliant shade of red, making a nice life-sized image of a tomato.

 

Stuttering, the mighty Taijiya tried in vain to come up with a suitable answer. “Well, uh, if we don't count his attempt to grope my butt,” here making a dramatic pause, “then no. He didn't do anything except the fact he was about to spy on us.”

 

Kagome couldn't hold it any longer. Her own misery forgotten, she broke into a fit of giggles. This was what she needed. Her inner voice sang in bliss at the sudden joy overwhelming her saddened heart, telling her to let her ponderings be. The longer she persisted in the sorrow, the more useless she became. She would find a way to save her friend from hell.

 

The rest of their bathing ritual passed without any unusual events. Once finished, the girls returned to the camp, finding the hanyou and the miko sitting by a tree, Kagome shot them a warm smile before scrambling in her sleeping bag. The day had taken its toll on her, her exhausted body falling asleep in no time. No bad thoughts haunted her as the blackness surrounded her tired mind. There were many things planned for the next day and she had to be refreshed to accomplish her duties.

 

 

The sun stood in zenith as a panting and sweat-covered body plummeted to its knees. Kagome's training started early in the morning. Her fighting skills improved greatly in the past few days where she received the help of her “older” sister and her former incarnation. The progress was the greatest where her miko powers were involved. Her barriers seemed to be solid enough to hold on their own should she need their protection. Her purifying arrows held more power as well. She further mastered the amount of energy she intended to put into them, not depending so much on the safety of her friends and her current feelings.

 

`Perfect! The second time sitting in dirt. How in the hell does Sango manage to get me off guard!? More interesting, how does she manage to get me off balance!?' What was true about her miko progress hadn't been the same in her combat skills. She was still too unbalanced, which made many strikes from the adversary a success.

 

“Com' on.” Sango yelled. “I know you can do better! What have I told you about that stance? You have to extend the space between your feet. Otherwise, it's easy for your opponent to get you to loose your footing.” Sango admonished her friend. It was too important for her to know Kagome would be safe even without them near by.

 

“I'm trying, Sango-chan. It is so intricate, the complete combat rules and stances. I hope I won't fail your teaching.” Kagome was doing her best.

 

Once again, she landed on her behind after a well chosen attack from her fighter friend.

 

Unaware, a pair of chocolate envious eyes was watching her battling around with the youkai exterminator. `I needed years of hard training to control my powers and not to be a danger for all around me. Not to mention cast a barrier. The girl's skills are stunning. Only a few days were all she needed to master her powers. Pity I couldn't push her further. There is far more to her powers than she can envision in her wildest dreams.' Brows narrowing in disgust and hatred, the more important matter of winning the current war were pushed aside. `I am not going to tell that slip of a woman about the potential hidden in the depths of her soul.' With a malicious smirk, Kikyou turned on her heels, her long coal-black hair blowing in the breeze behind her retreating form.

 

During her contemplations, Kagome managed to greet the dirt a few more times, each one landing with a loud thud. Her ungraceful fall was followed with an `Ouch' and some curses spoken under her breath. Bet not even Inuyasha with his advanced hearing could decipher them.

 

“Hey Kagome, you are great.” A rust-coloured bundle of fur jumped on the edge of the training grounds. Recently, he supported his surrogate mother as much as he could. He was so proud of her. She progressed well.

 

“Arigato, Shippou-chan, for your support,” she mocked him a little, but knew it would make him happy, “I wouldn't make it without you.”

 

The kit puffed out his chest. He was happy that Kagome appreciated his support.

 

Stretching out her hands, she mentioned for him to come to her. During her training, he had to spent the time with Miroku or Inuyasha. She had been too busy with her workout to be at his side. Afterwards, she was glad when she made it to the onsen and managed to eat something before she collapsed onto her sleeping bag.

 

Last evening, she decided to make a plan for her drill, so she could have the afternoon free. This meant to wake up at dawn. From dawn until breakfast, stretching and meditation were planned. After that, Sango took over, or Kikyou. So before lunch, she was done with training and then, she could play with Shippou, take a walk or do whatever she wished.

 

Inuyasha was not pleased and called her a loafer. She turned sharply at his crude comment and yelled an osuwari at him. With some muffled curses and a hurt look, the hanyou leaped into the trees and sat on a branch for the rest of the morning, following Kagome's training silently from where he sat. He would never admit it, nor tell her that he admired her progress. Seeing her outstretched arms, he knew Shippou would jump into her awaiting embrace. It pained him somehow, that for the past few days since Kikyou came to them, he retreated from his best friend, knowing how much it hurt her. It made him cringe. He was so torn apart. The more time he spent with his former love, the clearer it became to him that he never loved Kagome for who she was, but whom she reminded him of. He realized it would do no good in their mating, should he decide against following Kikyou to hell. He was so confused as to what to do.

 

 

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Yamen - court in Chinese

Onsen - pond