Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Falls Apart ❯ Her Strength She Hides ( Chapter 5 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Falls Apart

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Chapter 5: Her Strength She Hides

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Save My Life

By Pink

She's back on drugs again

Even though she knows it ain't right

She can't even call up her friends

And say "help me save my life"

She's so ashamed of herself that she's come full circle

Nobody understands what it's like to

Be this girl

So she disappeared, and she

Wasn't clear, and she

Didn't say where she was going

Save my life, won't you help me

Save my life, won't you hear me

Save my life, won't you help me

She had the man of her dreams

And some success

And she was so happy, and looking well

It was this one dark night, that she

Slipped

And then the next morning that she

Felt like a piece of shit

So she's hanging out, and she's

With the crowd, and she's

Travelin' where the wind is blowing

Save my life, won't you help me

Save my life, won't you hear me

Save my life, won't you help me

And he's a real good guy and he

Wants to save her 'cause he's

More than been there all before

And she's so confused and his heart is breaking and he

Dreams she's knocking on his door

Save my life, won't you help me

Save my life, won't you hear me

Save my life, won't you help me

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Sakura slowed as she reached the doors to the hospital, fearing what she knew was going to come the minute she passed over that threshold.

Pain. Fear. Torture. A broken heart and a shattered dream.

Sasuke.

She finally paused in front of the pane of glass that marked her last boundary of safety. Her grip on Shikamaru's hand slackened as she stared through the transparent pane in panicked terror. She couldn't go!

Quivers of fear shook her frame, and she finally dropped her companion's hand to wrap her arms about her slim body. Goosebumps rose up to attest how afraid she was.

Shikamaru observed her behavior and knew what was bothering her so intensely. She was scared out of her wits. Hell, he was scared out of his own wits as well. He had no desire to face off with the Uchiha jerk. Face off with a more than likely pissed, insane, and jealous Uchiha.

Shikamaru tried not to visualize the many possible outcomes of his own demise should Sasuke get his hands on him. Many involved the Mangekyou Sharingan. Many, to his horror, included Shikamaru losing to Naruto in Go. How horrid a fate that would be!

The jounin placed his hands in his pockets as he watched the pink-haired medic. He wanted to comfort her, but how do you comfort someone who is about to face down their worst nightmare? Especially when that nightmare was everyone else's also. Making up his mind, he pulled his hand out of his pocket and gently set it down on Sakura's shoulder. He stepped forward so he could speak quietly into her ear.

“You're not alone. But you've got to do this if you want to move on.”

Sakura continued to stare fearfully out of the window, but slowly nodded her head, her teeth worrying her bottom lip. She reached up and grabbed Shikamaru's hand, gently pulling it from her shoulder.

But she didn't let go.

Instead, she treaded her fingers with Shikamaru's, keeping her grip firm, but trembling from her fear.

“Promise…promise you won't abandon me. Promise that you won't leave my side.” Her voice had gone up in pitch, and was tremulous.

Shikamaru was taken aback when Sakura became so bold as to grasp his hand. But he didn't pull away. Instead, he knew she needed the physical support along with the mental. He came up the rest of the way to her smaller form, wrapping her in a hug from behind and pulling her tight against his chest.

Her head was tucked neatly underneath his chin, and her tremors lessened almost immediately, with the older jounin's arms circling her waist firmly. A niggling little voice in the back of the jounin's head murmured at the feeling of the soft, pale skin of her flat stomach. He proceeded to immediately beat that voice into extinction and banish it from his mind.

“I've already made the promise that I wouldn't leave you alone with that sadistic bastard as long as I have a breath inside of this lazy body. Please don't doubt me in that promise. It's hard enough to get one out of me in the first place.”

A dry, forced chuckle escaped Sakura's lips.

“I'm sorry Shikamaru.”

Sakura then, with a resigned sigh, pulled away from the Nara's embrace, and stepped toward the door. But she didn't release his hand. She didn't glance back at him, but pulled him gently forward towards the door where the sunlight was quickly fading.

“Here goes nothing.”

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Tsunade stood next to the nursing station, which had a straight shot view of the front door. She felt her heart go with Sakura, and fear for her apprentice's life filled her to the brim. But watching Shikamaru give her support and encouragement gave her hope also. She had heard his promise to the pink-haired medic, and knew he took his promises seriously.

She knew this because it was like pulling teeth with no anesthetic to get the bullheaded shadow user to promise to complete a mission to the fullest extent for ANBU. She couldn't count the numerous times she had fought with him about how he only accomplished the minimum for some missions. And the little shit actually had the balls to yell back at her! Well, maybe not yell…more like grumble heatedly while giving her the `glare of death' as she had dubbed it.

Her heart clenched once again as she watched Shikamaru pull Sakura close, an unusual look of fear on his face, and an especially rare look of possessiveness making his body taut. She felt for the poor boy. He'd been the first to observe the signs of Sakura's predicament, and had watched it from afar for years. She suspected that he'd even fallen for her apprentice, just had to get it through his thick, obstinate skull that his `troublesome worries about that troublesome Haruno' was really caring, respect, and possibly love.

As Sakura moved to finally step through the front door, the Hokage could only do one thing: pray that her own penchant for bad luck didn't rub off the poor kunoichi enough that living stopped this night. If Sakura could not stop the Uchiha, then Konoha would more than likely fall.

`Good luck, my daughter…'

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`One step after the other old girl. Don't try to think about what is going to happen here in a few hours. Just remember that Shikamaru is right behind you…as you wear this completely indecent outfit that hentai sensei gave you…'

Sakura was fuming again soon enough, and Shikamaru could feel the animosity rolling off of her in waves.

That annoying little voice in the back of his head resurrected itself and was telling him that he had something to do with this sudden bout of violent temper. If her angry glances back at him weren't cluing him in enough.

That irritating voice was also noting how it wasn't just her face that flushed with anger.

`Che…like I care about the homicidal medic and how her entire body flushes right before my eyes…troublesome female…probably thinks I'm undressing her in my mind. Like there's anything left to undress from her…'

Shikamaru's face flushed at his train of thought and instantly kicked himself mentally as he saw Sakura's eyes narrow at him. Pain seemed evident in the near future.

Not to be disappointed, Sakura whirled around and planted her palm on the side of Shikamaru's face, leaving an impressive red handprint.

“STOP STARING DAMMIT! You're supposed to be getting used to how I am dressed! Not taking advantage of it!”

Shikamaru opened his mouth to defend his position when Sakura pulled him in front of her, as if she were expecting him to lead the way to her house.

“I was not taking advantage of your underdressed state. What do you take me for, a lecher? Che…troublesome woman.”

He decided to go ahead and not fight Sakura about who was leading the way and started walking. Murderous waves of malice continued to radiate from Sakura's slim form, and he started to feel fear for his well-being.

Thoughts of a certain green tray entered his mind, and he gave a mental shudder. At least there was no way his arch-nemesis would fit into his incensed companions lacking attire.

`Ha! The troublesome tray will never be able to sneak up on me again!' Inner-Shikamaru exclaimed in glee, doing a little celebratory dance.

Sakura glared at the back of Mr.-Pineapple-denying-that-he's-ogling-me-Head. Like hell he wasn't taking advantage. His flush revealed all as she had glanced back to make sure he wasn't doing such a thing.

She didn't relinquish her hold on Shikamaru's hand when she forced him to take the lead. For all that he was pissing her off, his presence was a buffer for the terror that was waiting just down the street.

The sun was leaving a trailing blaze of fiery kisses on the dark sky when they finally saw Sakura's hell come into view. The pink haired kunoichi gripped Shikamaru's hand harder to signal him of her growing unease.

His hand squeezed back in acknowledgement and comfort. He then pulled her hand so that she was walking even with him. “Ready?”

Sakura shook her head vigorously, pink hair flying about. “No. I never will be, but that won't stop this all from happening. Do you have a plan?”

Shikamaru shook his head. “The only thing I can come up with is that you use taijutsu and medical ninjutsu. And that you be wary for genjutsu. Sasuke can't copy taijutsu and medical ninjutsu is something he isn't familiar with and won't see coming. Because he uses his eyes to cast genjutsu, you need to be careful and not look him in the eyes. That's the best I can come up with for right now.”

Sakura nodded her understanding. “He'll be home in an hour or two. Want to wait inside? He'll sense you one way or another. Might as well have strength in numbers when he arrives. He'll be drunk and pissed.”

She shuddered, but stepped around Shikamaru to the front door of her home. Opening it, she walked through to the living room, the kitchen off to the right and a hallway straight ahead, leading to the bedrooms and bathroom.

Shikamaru followed quietly after, taking in the home.

Dust covered everything almost a quarter of an inch thick. The most recently disturbed things were broken or shattered, giving hints to the violence that Sakura was exposed to almost every night.

Anger swelled up in Shikamaru at the thought of Sasuke touching the kunoichi in anything but reverence. She didn't deserve that treatment.

The bastard would pay.

Sakura had released Shikamaru's hand and closed the door before turning to face her `protector.' She was taken aback at the angry look on his face. His eyes were narrowed and focused on nothing in particular, lips thinned, and he was grinding his teeth slightly. She could just imagine him growling too.

She stepped in front of him.

“Shikamaru, what are you thinking about, that has you so angry?”

The jounin snapped out of his violent fantasies of killing a certain black-haired bastard at the medic's words. His anger instantly dispelled upon the helpless and lost look on her face.

“About how you deserve so much more than what you have right now. That Sasuke never deserved you after the shit he pulled even before you married him.”

Sakura smiled softly, but sadly. “If I deserved better, then I would have gotten better. I must have deserved this, because it happened.”

Shikamaru's eyes flashed angrily. “How can you say that? How can you succumb to all the shit that you had thrown your way so easily? You are stronger than that, you're braver than that. You have to be because you survived this long intact.”

He stepped in front of her and grabbed her arms, pulling her so that her face was mere inches from his own.

His anger disappeared as he noticed that tears were in her eyes again and was looking at him in something akin to fear. Her body trembled and she sagged in his grip, almost submitting to him.

“Please don't hurt me, I'm sorry…” she whispered quietly.

Shikamaru pulled her into a hug. He kept forgetting that though she survived, it didn't mean that she wasn't broken. Sasuke had broken her will to fight back. Any aggressiveness on the part of an opposing male made Sakura submit almost immediately to their dominance.

With the exception being Naruto. She still fought tooth and nail with the blonde at every turn. Didn't matter what, but she verbally abused and dominated the Kyuubi container.

“I won't hurt you Sakura. Never. But it aggravates me that you submitted so easily to Sasuke. Had it been anyone else and you would have been all over them like white on rice. You wouldn't have just sat there and taken their shit. You're so stubborn and strong. You should have easily been able to thwart Sasuke-bastards behavior. I wish you could see what everyone else sees in you.”

Sakura wrapped her arms about the jounin's waist, tears entering her eyes as he spoke. She wished she could be everything he said she was…

“You're strong, stubborn, smart, and any male and even a few females would agree that you are attractive.”

He pulled back and grasped Sakura's chin in his hand, making her look him in the eyes. He drank in her glassy sea-green eyes as they looked at him in sadness and a bit of longing.

“Don't ever let anyone convince you otherwise. Not Sasuke, not anyone, because they would be lying through their teeth. You would be doing not only yourself, but those who say such things about you a dishonor.”

His face drew closer to hers, being sucked in by the look of hopelessness in her eyes and the lost tears that trailed quietly down her cheeks. He wanted to take all her cares and worries away. Wanted to make her forget all of her horrid experiences. Wanted to comfort and care for her, and show her that there was more to life than the one she had been suffering.

Entering a daze, he soon found himself kissing away the tears on her cheeks, finding that they marred the beauty of her face. He also found that both of his hands had traitorously moved to gently hold Sakura's head between them.

His body was acting without his permission, yet he couldn't come up with a good argument at the moment to stop.

Sakura leaned into Shikamaru's warm hands as his lips kissed away her tears, and oddly enough, her insecurities and fears about her abilities. He must truly believe his words if he was going through all this to convince her. And doing it so gently so as not to scare her off.

She closed her eyes and reveled in the feeling of the jounin's soft lips on her face. They no longer stayed on just her cheeks, for the tears had all been kissed away. Now the kisses worked their way all over her face, on her forehead, temples, eyelids, nose…

On her lips…

All thoughts fled both of their minds as they concentrated on what exactly was being transmitted through the kiss. Shikamaru pressing his point that she deserved so much more, Sakura seeking something that she thought she had at first, but never received.

The kiss never became passionate, just chaste, innocent and to prove a gentle point.

Shikamaru pulled away first, glancing over Sakura's blushing face, her eyes still closed.

The irritating, niggling voice returned, pressing him on to continue. To really show Sakura what she was missing. He immediately punted it away, not wanting to ruin the moment that had surfaced.

The look on Sakura's face was the most peaceful he had ever seen, and it complimented her better than her sadness.

He rubbed a thumb under one her eyes, over the cheek bone. He pressed his forehead against hers.

“Got it woman?”

Sakura smiled softly at his words. “Yeah, I got it.”

They stood like that for a time, before Sakura pulled away.

“I don't know when my `husband' will be getting home, but I know that neither of us has eaten. I have some instant udon. Want some?”

Shikamaru shrugged, falling back into his normal attitude, slightly disgruntled at his open display of emotion.

“Don't care. Whatever you feel like woman.”

Sakura rolled her eyes, but turned to the kitchen, muttering about idiot men.

“Udon it is then, idiot Nara. My name is Sakura by the way. Thought you might want to know that seems as you insist on being my babysitter.”

His feathers ruffled at her comment, Shikamaru snorted.

“I'm not your babysitter woman, though with the way you are acting, you may need one soon.”

Sakura replied with a snort of her own.

“Whatever you say, idiot Nara.”

Stepping into the kitchen and sifting through cupboards, Sakura left Shikamaru to his own devices in her living room.

The shadow user picked up picture frames and wiped the dust off to look at them. The vast majority of them were of both Sasuke and Sakura together, looking happy. One was even their wedding picture.

The rest of the pictures were of Sakura with various classmates. In two, she was smiling happily at Hinata's and Naruto's wedding. Another was of Team 7.

Done snooping around, Shikamaru sat down on the couch. It was a pale blue, and Shikamaru was dismayed to find blood stains all over it. He was reminded of why he needed to help Sakura.

Sakura walked in with udon in each hand, finding Shikamaru finger the numerous stains on the couch, all of which bore painful memories. The look on his face told her that he knew what they were and how they had gotten there.

She went and sat next to the shadow user, breaking him out of the glaring contest he was having with the discolorations. His dark eyes smoldered as they locked on to her tired and sad sea-foam ones. She handed him the cup and looked down at the stains.

“If it helps you any, I barely remember anything from when he beats me. I kind of phase out.”

Shikamaru shook his head indicating that that didn't make him feel any better. He slowly ate the udon, hoping that he wouldn't throw it up in a short while.

They both ate in a tense silence, unsure of what their future would bring them as soon as Sasuke walked through the door. Soon both finished their instant meal.

Sakura collected the utensils and trash and left for the kitchen without a word. She was confused at Shikamaru's behavior, and at her own reaction. She hadn't thought that the jounin was capable of displaying emotion or caring.

She honestly thought he didn't care about the opposite sex due to the constant `troublesome women this' and `troublesome women that.' But here he was, doing everything he could to convince her that what she was going through was not good for her and that she deserved more from life.

Went so far as to kiss her.

And she had liked it. But she couldn't bring herself to believe that it was for any personal caring, that he was just doing it to give her the strength to get through this in one piece.

Either way, he had her convinced. She needed to get away from Sasuke. And she doubted that the Uchiha would let her go until either one of them were dead.

Finishing with her cleaning, she felt that familiar tremor go through her diminutive form, and her stomach felt like she had swallowed ice cold lead. He was coming, and he was pissed, yet strangely excited.

Shikamaru had been observing Sakura from the couch and immediately knew what was wrong when Sakura stiffened up.

“How far away?”

Sakura's impressive grip on the counter was causing it to crack.

“Down the street. He knows you're here, and he seems excited about it…”

Shikamaru stood and walked up behind Sakura, wrapping her in another hug.

“You can do this. Just think about all of the injustices he has done to you and not about what he has done or can do. You are stronger than that.”

Sakura nodded weakly and leaned back into the embrace taking comfort that someone cared and would possibly go down with her should anything go awry.

Shikamaru caught himself breathing in Sakura's scent, a delicate cool flower fragrance. He felt his own anxiety calm upon taking it in. He leaned down and whispered into Sakura's ear.

“Let's go greet him at the front door. I'm sure that making him angry in an inebriated state will cause him to make mistakes.”

Sakura gave a curt nod and took in a deep breath to collect and calm herself, doing as Shikamaru had suggested and thought of all the things she had missed out on being truly happy about because of Sasuke's abuse.

She pulled away and strode confidently to stand five feet away from the front door, her stance defiant, legs shoulder length apart, and arms crossed over her chest. Her anger grew with every unhappy memory, with every missed opportunity.

And her confidence vanished abruptly as she watched the door knob turn.

`It's him, dear kami, it's him…'

She almost screamed as she looked into the blood red eyes that greeted her upon the door swinging silently open. They promised pain and suffering. They were more maniacal and psychotic than ever before, and she found herself frozen to the spot.

“Hello Sakura, dear. Nice to see you waiting for me, and you even dressed up for me. Not to mention you invited a guest over.”

`Fuck…'

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A/N: -laughs manically- Cliffhanger! Hahahahahaha! Well, I have to say that this chapter is the epitome of crappiness and I must apologize ahead of time. Hopefully the next chapter will make up for it. Now, for my faithful reviewers:

BlueKanji- Sorry to say, but school's a bitch and it dictates all of my time…but thank you for the compliment. -grins-

Dustbunny3- Whoopsie…sannin it is…and I rather like the use of Japanese words. I prolly should tack on a section at the end that defines them, but I'm so lazy… -sighs- Leave more feed back, and thank you very much!

Shinobi Darkbeak- I looked at you suggestion, and you're right, it fits very well. -starts planning on next chapters-

ShortySC22- Thank you.

Youkaigurl- Hehehehe…shocked was to say the least…

Inuyashafeudalgirl- Thank you.

The warmth of the Afterglow- Angst lover? Ooooo…we'll see.

hysterical laughter- Thank you.

Olive Oil- Thank you.

Romantix- So am I, so am I. No harm, no foul. ^^

Ankhazu- Well, Sasuke is a little bit crazy, so I wouldn't think that his reasoning would be very clear. Besides, it keeps everyone guessing. Thank you!

xXxAllMySinsxXx- I found a lot of good ShikaSaku off of ffnet. Type in their names along with fanfiction on yahoo and you should get some entries. Good ones can be found on livejournal, but you gotta dig for them.

Fiona McKinnon- O.K.H.U.G. (OKay. Here U Go.) -smiles-

K-chan9- Thank you.

Amon's Eve- Thank you.

Jayde-Green07- Boredom can be a good thing. -smiles-

AnimeGirl2006- Hehehehe. Maybeh, maybeh not. We'll just have to wait and see.

Noyesgirl- Thank you.

MisatoNoYume- Here ya go. -laughs-