Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Fetish? What's A Fetish? ❯ Doctors Call Their Job Practice ( Chapter 13 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

-----Author’s note: I do not own Naruto, but any other characters and ideas are my own. Enjoy.....-----


“And that’s why it’s called the angry dragon.”

“.....”

“Hey! Are you listening?”

“.....Huh? Oh, you do realize you lost me at hotel, right?”

“Weren’t you listening at all?”

“Well, I was, but then I started thinking about something that was, you know, not as boring as you.”

“Naru-daddy!” Crystal groaned, grabbing onto Naruto’s arm and pointing at Sasuke, “He’s being mean!”

The group of three were making their way down a beaten path, one that they had been on not too long ago. The town was in their sights, drawing closer with every weary step. Naruto, donning the purple clothes he was pretty sure only those attracted to men would be comfortable in, looked lazily up at the blonde girl clinging to his arm as she whined about Sasuke being less than amiable. If he was honest, he had no idea what the two had been talking about, at all. He had been thinking about the slow approach of Hinata’s birthday, and how he still had very little idea of what exactly to do about it. He’d also been thinking about Anko. A lot. Hearing someone say that they loved him was pretty intense, and he’d be lying if he said he hadn’t liked it. It would be even more of a lie if he said he hadn’t wondered a million times if she had meant it, or not.

What would that mean to him if she did? If someone loved him....if Anko did, how was he supposed to react? Granted it was a very strong possibility that she was only trying to play with his head, but the thought really had him wondering about her. If he wasn’t thinking about her, he was thinking about Hinata or Sakura. Kakashi had said that Hinata wanted some sex from him. It had been a ‘sort of’ joke, so there was truth behind it, no matter how much or little. If she wanted the sex from him, did that mean that she loved him? Likewise, did Anko want the sex from him because she loved him? Did she love him, though? He had believed for a short time that you needed to love someone to do sex with them, but was that really the case?

And what was he supposed to do about Sakura? They had kissed, but.....it didn’t feel special at all. Did he not love her like he thought he did? Were they really only just friends, to him? When he thought about her, it still made him happy, but it didn’t make him feel dizzy, like it used to. Maybe he’d just worked it up too much in his head, envisioning something beyond spectacular. He likely built it up so high that nothing could have met his expectations. Not realistically, anyway. When he put it like that, he had to admit that maybe he really did love Sakura, but was blinding himself with visions of grandeur and fluffy pink clouds of perfection. It just wasn’t like that, in the real world.....

“N-Naru-daddy?”

“Huh?” Naruto snapped out of his thoughts which were threatening to consume him entirely. He’d hardly been able to walk straight, all day.

“Are you ok?” The tall blonde girl put her hand on Naruto’s forehead, her sparkly blue eyes surveying his own, “You looked kind of sick, just a second ago.”

“He always looks kind of sick when he’s thinking. He’s not used to it, yet,” Sasuke provided the answer to the question.

“Yeah, I’m just a little muddled up, right now,” He brushed the girl’s hand away, “But I’m ok.”

Though she was pouting a little, Crystal let it go, and they continued their almost completed march to town in brief silence. Said brief silence was dispersed when the girl of the three let out a little ‘oh!’, dunking her fist into her handbag to pull out a couple of walkie-talkies, which she handed out to both boys.

“And what do we need these for?” Naruto asked, looking the small black box over.

“You can use these to keep in touch with each other for up to one mile, and I’ve got one, too! It will help us coordinate from wherever we might be, and keep us from getting caught by Marcus one on one,” Crystal explained pleasantly.

“Yeah, I’m not really worried about it,” Sasuke replied, offering her the item back, “We’re ninjas, and there’s no way some legendary purple-clothes-wearing booty trafficker is going to ‘catch’ me, or even Naruto, for that matter. Give me a break.”

“What’s ‘booty trafficker’ mean?” Naruto asked his Uchiha protector, who apparently understood the phrase Tsunade had used before their departure from Konoha.

“Don’t know,” He replied honestly, “But it sounds pretty lame. Like the walkie. Take it, already!”

Crystal shook her head in defiance, “Nope, you’re keeping it! Unless you know some sort of telepathy ninja move you can magically teach me within the next ten minutes, I need you to have them so I can keep in contact with you, at the very least. So tough love, honey!”

“I’ll show you tough love!” Sasuke growled, giving the annoying girl a heated look.

“I’ll give you a discount, cutie.”

“Not sure how that was a good come back at all,” Naruto stated, looking at his prostitute with a raised eyebrow, “But cut it out, already! We’re almost there, so just keep the lid on. Sasuke, keep the walkie, Crystal, take the lead and get us to where we’re supposed to be!”

Deciding to hold his tongue and just get the mission done with as quickly as possible, Sasuke jammed the tiny black communication device into his pocket and kept walking in silence. Crystal put on a big grin at her ‘victory’ over Sasuke, and picked up the pace a little bit to take the lead.

-

Despite it being so bright outside on this lovely day, it was rather dark inside the room containing two particularly rambunctious people. The curtains were pulled shut, the door was locked, the clothes were off, and the party was on. Well, it had been on for awhile, but nonetheless, it was on, now.

Sweat coursed down her body not unlike a light rain on a window. He couldn’t blame her for getting so hot, either. They’d been rather busy for the better part of the last four hours, and he was a bit on the moist side, himself. The way she was moving was enough to send most men into epileptic fantasies, and only by holding onto reality (Along with a couple other things) as hard as he could did he keep conscious at all. He wasn’t just a spectator, though. He was touching her. Not only that, he was actually.....Oh, damn! This round was about to come to an end, it seemed.

“Temari-chan! I-I’m about to.....”

Too late. Ass hole.

-

“Alright,” Crystal spoke up as the three allies traversed the streets of the city towards their destination only she knew, “We made it without a hitch, and that’s a good thing.”

“Really?” Sasuke asked sarcastically, “I thought we wanted something to go wrong.”

“Quiet, you! Anywho, now that we’re here it’s time to meet your new best friend, Dr. Hugh Jwang.”

Naruto froze in his tracks, “Doctor? Why are we going to see a doctor!?”

Crystal laughed, flipping her hair back, “He’s not really a doctor, that’s just what everyone calls him.”

“Why?” The Uchiha of the three asked.

“‘Cause if you’re a girl, he’s good for what ails ya!”

“.....He knows where the best tampons are?” Naruto asked, raising his hand a little.

“What’s a tampon?” Sasuke asked, confused.

Crystal stared at the two for a second, then laughed before starting, “A tampon is a-”

“Toy that makes girls happy,” Naruto finished.

“Oh,” Sasuke nodded sagely, “Sort of like chocolate?”

“That’s a stereotype! And what does chocolate have to do with tampons?” The girl asked, now genuinely confused.

“Nothing. Unless it’s in ice cream. Tampons plus ice cream plus grammatically distressed girl equals a happy girl,” The blonde stated simply, turning to glance at Sasuke, “Trust me.”

“Grammatically confused.....You mean a period, right?” Crystal chuckled, then admitted, “You have a weird sense of humor, Naru-daddy.”

“I thought a period was when a girl snapped her fingers in a ‘z’ shape,” Sasuke then performed said action, bobbing his head from side to side as he did for dramatic affect, “When they were serious about something. You know, it was like putting a period at the end of their sentence.”

“Wouldn’t that be more of an exclamation point, though?” The blonde ninja wondered softly.

“So girls can have exclamation points, too?” Sasuke looked at Crystal and asked, “Does it hurt?”

Naruto spoke before she could, “No, I think exclamation points would make girls happy, or surprised, or something. A question mark might hurt, though. Does having your question mark hurt?” He asked, eyeing the girl seriously.

“You have a VERY weird sense of humor, Naru-daddy,” Crystal sighed, pointing behind them, “In that bar is where you can find the good doctor. I’m gonna go and get batteries for my walkie in the store right across the street, and I’ll be right back with you. Can you handle that?”

“We’re not little kids, woman,” Sasuke snapped, “Go buy your batteries, we’ll be fine.”

Waving her away as he spun around to enter the bar, Sasuke flinched when he saw that, typically, there were two bars side by side and he had no idea which one Crystal had meant. Casting a glance at Naruto, he asked sourly, “Do you know which one she meant?”

“Of course I don’t. That would mean something would have had to go right. Can’t have that,” Naruto replied just as sourly.

“Oh, whatever, let’s just go,” Sasuke grabbed Naruto by the shirt and gave him a little tug. The blonde eyed a ramen stand beside the bar they were headed to, and the several tables and chair out front so people could eat and enjoy the sunshine. It was beautiful, and he made a mental note to eat there at some point. The two strode across the street and flung the double doors to the bar open, looking around at the room now before them.

It was a rough sight. Nearly every man in there was three or four times their size, many bearing huge tattoos of naked women, skulls, dragons, flames, and even some naked women holding flaming dragon skulls. It wasn’t too much of a strain on the mind to imagine that a couple of them were old convicts, because some of the scars they had looked a lot like kunai inflicted wounds, likely made upon their capture, or by someone else in prison. At one table, a man had his hand spread out on the surface and was jamming a knife in-between his fingers as fast as he could. He appeared to be missing his index finger. The place also smelled faintly of urine and blood, sort of like a hospital. Only with more needles and less bleach.

After surveying this scene, and having successfully attracted the attention of every patron in the room with the whole ‘flinging the doors open’ thing, Sasuke did what any self-assured ninja with a mission would do; Get down to business, and let everyone know you meant it. He did so by barking out the following:

“I need a Hugh Jwang, and I need one now! So point me in the right direction or I’ll impale each and every one of you until I find one!”

The bar fell horribly silent, just then. The only audible sound was a zipper being undone somewhere in the room.

“Now, I don’t see how and I might be mistaken,” Naruto mumbled, “But I think they may have misunderstood you.”

“We’re in the wrong bar, too, aren’t we?” Sasuke asked, watching as everyone stood up at the same time.

“Most likely.”

-

Though it was so sunny outside on this lazy day, it was pretty shady inside the room containing two particularly busy people. The curtains were pulled shut, the door was locked, the clothes were off, and the party was on. Again. And, again, it had been on for a good while, by this point.

On his knees, breathing hard but hammering harder, the hero of this adventure practically burst a blood vessel when a heavy moan escaped the woman on all fours before him. He took a hold of her hair to pull her head back a little, using the added stability to go at his job even harder than he had been, before, which drew a quick and excited breath from the girl. Uh oh! He was getting to into it!

Temari looked over her shoulder at the man, “H-Hey, d-d-don’t do it i.....”

Too late. Ass hole.

-

Naruto landed on his hands, somersaulting gracefully back to his feet after having been flung from the bar. He then dodged three men as Sasuke flung them out of the bar, himself then rushing out after them as a wave of angry, testosterone-filled juggernauts spilled onto the street after him.

The blonde caught Sasuke by the arm as he sped by, swinging him full round and into the air, letting him go so he flew into the first bar-goer like a spear, feet first. Several screams filled the area as the bar-fight gone street-fight went into riot mode. Everyone in the vicinity started beating the crap out of each other with no regard for who anyone was, or anything. It was chaotic. Even people from the bar who had originally wanted to break Sasuke’s teeth in were beating each other up. If your grandmother was with you, you likely could have given her a jab to the jaw and she probably wouldn’t have given two thoughts to it. Naruto watched in wonder as a little girl kicked a little boy in-between the legs, then dove headlong into the fray of nearby fighting children as he fell to the ground, crying.

Somewhat caught off-guard by this sudden turn of events, Naruto was taken by surprise when a mean left hook from one of the bar-goers sent him stumbling over into the ramen stand’s eating area, narrowly avoiding a table covered with the precious food he so adored. As he checked to make sure none of the ramen had been knocked over, and therefore wasted, one of the waitresses slammed a chair into his back, sending him stumbling once again, this time into a waitress carrying a tray filled with ramen bowls. Both people fell to the ground, and the ramen was flung up into the air, in which the bowls overturned and let loose shimmering golden droplets of deliciousness into the sky above them. On his back, Naruto watched the glistening golden beauty above him as the sun reflected off of the liquid, sparkles making his mouth water.

“It’s a beautiful, wonderful, golden shower.....” He whispered to himself as Sasuke grabbed him by the collar and hoisted him into the air, punching him once in the face, “OW! HEY!” Naruto shouted, ready to punch him back.

“It’s ok, it’s ok!” Sasuke reassured him, following after Crystal into the bar they hadn’t picked before.

Once inside, Crystal locked the door and gave Naruto and Sasuke both a stern look, “Not little kids, huh?”

“Hey, we started a riot. How many little kids do you know that do that?” Sasuke challenged.

“Two.”

After a second, Naruto looked at Sasuke, saying, “Does she mean-”

“Yes.”

“Oh. Well you just HAD to have your batteries, so don’t get on our case about it!”

“If you had just been paying attention to me, Naru-daddy, this whole thing could have been avoided!” Crystal pointed out.

“Well you made a horrible mistake in thinking that we were going to pay attention, what with us being little kids, and all,” Naruto laughed, raising a hand which Sasuke promptly slapped.

A teen flew through the window near the door, glass littering the ground around him as he rolled to a stop and remained motionless.

“You’re right,” Crystal motioned to the boy, “That’s totally my fault.”

“Thank you for being the adult,” Sasuke tipped his head to her.

“And what is this all up in here?” A loud voice floated through the abandoned bar, a tall, well-built man wearing a white suit entering from a door in the back. The man didn’t stop walking as he scanned Naruto and Sasuke’s faces, his eyes finally landing on Crystal, who he gave a curt nod to, tipping his classy white hat to her. He then noticed the gaping hole in his window and the apparently unconscious teen on the ground before it, “Dayum, is he dead?”

Sasuke quickly produced a kunai, which he showed to the beautiful black man before him, “Do you want him to be dead?”

“Don’t be silly, Sasuke-kun,” Crystal pushed the boy’s hand down, “Naru-daddy, this is Dr. Hugh Jwang. Doctor, this is Kareem’s heir, savior to us all!”

“Can I call you my Hershey man?” Naruto asked earnestly, hoping for a yes.

Hugh stared blankly at him for a few seconds, then asked, “Are you fer real?” He then looked at Crustal, “Is he fer real?”

“It’s a valid question!” Sasuke stated loudly, also hoping for a yes.

“There ain’t no way this is Kareem’s heir, you kiddin’ me? Crystal, you been money in the past, but you musta smoked some weird ass shit to be bringing this kid up in here talking crazy like that. Get on outta here, girl,” Hugh turned to leave, but Crystal’s voice stopped him.

“Show him your cane,” She instructed.

Sasuke promptly unzipped his shorts.
“Not you!” Crystal squealed, “Naru-daddy! Show him Kareem’s cane!”

Naruto, somewhat disheartened that he had not been given the ok to call the good doctor his Hershey man, reached over his shoulder and into his traveling bag to pull out the cane, upon which seeing the doctor fell to a knee, lowering his head to Naruto.

“It was true! Forgive me for not seeing, Naru-daddy.....”

“You can call me Sasu-daddy! No, wait, can I call you Hugh-daddy?”

Naruto tilted his head a little, looking at Sasuke through the corner of his eye, “Man, what is wrong with you?” He asked in a whisper.

“I don’t know,” Sasuke replied just as quietly, “I see him, and suddenly I understand why women love chocolate so much. It’s not a stereotype or a joke, it’s the honest to God truth. This man is why, Naruto. I am confused and intrigued.....” A pretty ebony woman showed herself from the back door Hugh had used, moving down a little hall and entering another room, “And now,” Sasuke broke off, heading in her direction, “I have to go make a chocolate vanilla swirl, so if you’ll excuse me.....”

The Uchiha was stopped, however, when he practically plowed into yet another person, this one proving to be a familiar face. Temari looked down at Sasuke, using one arm to push him back a step, “It’s about time you two showed up. I was starting to wonder if I’d have to do this entire thing by myself.”

-

Hinata looked around nervously, wondering where Naruto could possibly be. It had been no small wonder for her to gather enough courage to visit Ichiraku’s ramen stand, and now what? No payoff? That hardly seemed fair at all!

“Naruto-kun.....” She sighed deeply, arms folded on one of the tables, her chin resting on them.

“Hm, so you finally decided to come looking for him, huh?” A pretty voice asked.

Hinata immediately flared red upon finding that someone had overheard her, looking up to find an equally pretty face to match the voice.

“I’m Ayame, it’s nice to finally meet you. Judging from your face, I’d have to say you were Hinata, right?”

Hinata managed a shaky nod as Ayame sat on the other side of the table, then started to undo her apron, “H-How d-do you know me? D-Don’t tell Naruto-kun I came here looking for him, PLEASE!”

“Yep, the cute shy girl that blushes and stammers a lot. Definitely Hinata Hyuuga. You know, Naruto talks a lot about you when he’s here.”

“N-N-Naruto-kun called m-me.....cute?”

This was a defining moment in both lady’s lives. Ayame could lie and say that yes, Naruto did indeed talk about her rather often and that he had called her cute on many occasions, likely causing the girl to lapse into a coma where she would likely remain until death. That, or she could tell the truth and say that yes, Naruto talked about her rather often and that he had called her cute on many occasions. For you see, Ayame was a young woman dealing with love. Not just any love, but the love of someone else. She had the opportunity to sow the seeds of said love for this girl! That meant that the difference between the truth and a lie was nonexistent. Whatever she said WAS the truth. If you disagree with her logic, you are wrong.

“Of course he did! The truth is, Naruto is a bit shy, himself, when it comes to things like this.....”

“N-Naruto-kun is, too?”

Ayame nodded, all whilst grinning broadly, “It’s just the cutest darned thing. He’s off on a mission, right now, but when he gets back, I’m sure he’d love for you to be there to welcome him!”

Hinata rose from her chair, both incredibly embarrassed and very happy. She wanted to talk about the whole ‘called me cute’ thing, but for the sake of her consciousness she staggered to her feet and towards the exit, “O-Ok, I w-will.....”

“Bye bye! Good luck!” Ayame giggled after her, very pleased with her interference. Now Naruto was well on his way to love! It was wonderful. She felt all warm and fuzzy inside. Sort of like when.....

She was snapped out of her thoughts when a certain pink-haired genin entered the stand and dropped down at one of the empty tables, setting folding her arms and setting her chin down on them.

‘Dare I do it?’ Ayame smirked at the thought.

“Naruto.....” Sakura sighed, looking sad.

‘For the god of love is a good god, and a god I shall praise through my works,’ Ayame jumped up from the table, sitting in front of Sakura, “Sakura-chan, how have you been?”

The genin jumped slightly at the intrusion, but gave a weak smile, “I’ve been.....ok.”

“Oh, really? You look like you need someone to talk to.....”

“No, really.....it’s ok, I’m fine,” Sakura tried to wave off the girl, but knew that the tone in her voice was giving it away that she was plenty troubled.

“It’s about Naruto, isn’t it?” Ayame knew she was right when Sakura’s lips pursed just a little. She played it coy and let the silence ride, knowing the girl would crack and talk any second. She restrained a grin when she was proven correct.

“I came here because it reminds me of him.....And I thought he might.....you know....be here, a little.....or something. .....” She trailed off when she started to feel the heat emanating from her face.

“You know, he talks an awful lot about you,” Ayame stated quietly, “He really does like you.”

“I think.....I did something that maybe.....changed his mind.....Ah, I haven’t been very nice to him, and I’m just feeling bad about it, that’s all! It’s no big deal!”

“Did something happen between you two?”

Again, Ayame was proven correct by the pursing of Sakura’s lips, followed by a rather startling revelation, “We kissed.”

It was here that Ayame’s inner voice broke out into song:

‘There’s a calm surrender
To the rush of day
When the heat of the rolling world
Can be turned away
An enchanted moment
And it sees me through
It’s enough for this restless waitress
To hear that from you.....’

“Um, Ayame? Are you ok?”

‘And can you feel the love tonight?
It is where you are
It’s enough for this wide eyed meddler
That you went that far
And can you feel the love tonight?
I might freaking dance
It’s enough to make me and Naruto
Believe he’s got a chance.....’

“HEY!”

Ayame stopped singing to herself, “Oh, sorry! Ha, ha.....”

“You were spacing out for a good two minutes, there. I know, I know, it’s a big deal, I know.....” Sakura turned as red as the setting sun outside, “I think that was the single greatest moment in my life.....”

Ayame squealed in girlish glee, “Oh, you’ve got to tell me everything! He hasn’t told me anything about this, at all!!!”

“H-He hasn’t, huh?” If her spirit wasn’t low before, it was certainly down for the count, now. That kiss had been spectacular. She couldn’t feel her legs afterwards. If Naruto hadn’t even mentioned it to the one girl he was likely to talk to, it couldn’t have meant anything at all to him. Ooh, it wasn’t fair! Why would she want him so bad when he was starting to not want her, at all? “I even got him a box of candies when we got back to say sorry, but I was too embarrassed to actually give them to him and just left them at his door.....How sad is that?”

Ayame had to admit, that was kind of sad, but she didn’t say it out loud. Instead, she gave a sad smile.

“Ok, you know what? Screw pride! I’m going to his house right now!” Sakura jumped up from the table, but Ayame caught her by the arm.

“Actually, Sakura-chan, Naruto’s off on a mission, at the moment, so you won’t be able to see him, right now.....”

“A.....mission?” Sakura’s disappointment was very clearly apparent on her face, “Ok, seriously, come on.....That’s just not even fair.....I’m gonna go to bed, now.....Thanks for listening.....” She started to leave, but whipped around to bark, “And if you ever tell any of this to Naruto, I’ll ram my hand down your throat, tear out your heart, and feed it to Akamaru! Get it?”

“GOT IT!”

“Good.”

Ayame watched in fear as the genin sulked off to her house, starting to sing to herself again:

‘And I guess that’s why they call it the blues
Time on my hands, could be.....’


“That’s it! I’m going to his house right now, and I’m gonna fu-”

Ayame’s singing was broken up by Ino shouting as she walked on by and down the street. She was quick to raise her hand and call out, “Naruto’s on a mission.”

“Dammit!” The blonde growled, “Wait for me Mr. Dickles, I’m coming home.....”

Ayame was quiet for a moment as Ino moved on, then she couldn’t help but mutter aloud, “Ino has a Mr. Dickles, too?”

-

“So Temari hasn’t done any actual jobs, yet? She’s just been using genjutsu to trick her clients?” Naruto asked, a little displeased with this.

“Well, yeah, genius,” Temari snorted, “There’s no way I’m gonna give anal to some forty-year-old fatass reject.”

Kareem’s heir sighed, shaking his head, “But I’m sure we’ll be getting plenty of anal from you.....”

“Yeah,” Sasuke piped in, “You’re kind of a bitch, if memory serves.”

Crystal stared at them for a few seconds, as did the good doctor and Temari, before Hugh stated, “You some crazy cats, you know that? You just so crazy that we might be able to ice Marcus, fer real. Tomorrow night Temari here’s gotta a new client that used to be a Marcus exclusive. He’s a big spender, and Marcus ain’t gonna take kindly to us messing with his customers. I would be surprised if he didn’t send a warning, or an invite, or something. This is the third regular we’ve snatched in the last week. Thing is, you’re gonna be there to get the message, big daddy.”

Naruto nodded, “Right. We’ll use this guy to find out where Marcus is hiding, right? Easy.”

“Easy,” The doctor echoed, standing up from the small table the five had been sitting at, “Alright, now, the night is young, but we need to be sharp for tomorrow. You three, head on off to the back. There are some beds ready for you, Temari can show you.”

Sasuke, along with the others, stood up, “And what about you two?”

“Well, now,” Hugh grinned, flashing his shiny white teeth, “I gotta tuck Crystal in, of course.”

“.....Will you tuck me in, too, Hershey man?”

“No dark chocolate from me, man, now get moving.”

With a sigh, Sasuke followed after Temari, as did Naruto. The next day promised to be an important one on their way to reclaiming prostitution supremacy.


-----Author’s other note: The two songs that Ayame sang in her head were both by Elton John, and were ‘Can You Feel The Love Tonight’ and ‘I Guess That’s Why They Call It The Blues’ respectively (Although I did noticeably change the first song). Also, I do not take credit for the name ‘Hugh Jwang’. It was some random guy’s screen name somewhere, and it made me laugh. A lot. And yes, Sasuke is intrigued by the dark meat. .....And neither of them has figured out what prostitution actually is, yet. Also, again also, look forward to my next update coming anywhere within the next three months. I know, I think it’s cool, too. Thanks for reading.....-----