Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Fetish? What's A Fetish? ❯ Pimp, Pussy Is My Product ( Chapter 14 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

-----Author’s note: If you don’t remember what’s going on in this story, do what I did. Read the chapter before this one. I do not own Naruto, but any other characters and ideas are my own. Enjoy.....-----


“Hey! Hey, Naru-daddy! Wake up!”

A gentle push followed, but nothing was to come of it.

“Naru-daddy, it’s time to wake up!” Crystal tried again, pushing a little harder. Her ninja-pimp was sprawled out on the bed, half covered by a blanket and half exposed to the morning air. He looked so young and innocent. Not to mention cute. When the blonde refused to stir from his sleep, she decided to switch up her tactics a little.

Sasuke, for no real reason other than for the sound of Crystal’s annoyingly high voice, decided this was a good time to wake up. The waking up was followed shortly thereafter by a sitting up, which was then followed, in turn, by an angry stare sent to the blonde woman. The anger quickly turned to shock, however, when he saw what was being done to Naruto.

Crystal rammed her hand down the front of her boss’s pants, wrapping her fingers around whatever it is that is to be found in guy’s pants. And no, it wasn’t his wallet.

Naruto immediately woke up, saw what was happening, and yelped in fear as he tumbled out of the bed and away from his molester. He shuffled along the ground and up against the closest wall, eyes pouring tears as he whimpered out, “Why!?”

Crystal put her hands together and set them to her cheek, “Aw! You’re so cute and small, Naru-daddy!”

Ouch. No other word properly sums it up.

Sasuke threw an arm up into the air, “Don’t call him small, what’s wrong with you?”

“I’ll have you know I’m average-sized for my age!” Naruto exclaimed, still cowering from Crystal’s icy hands. Never before had he been awoken in such a forthright and awkward manner. Not counting that one time he had dreamt of the perverted hermit and him swimming around in a monstrous bowl of ramen. Facing him that morning had been pretty awkward.

“D-Did I say something wrong?”

Temari sat up, rubbing her eyes, “What the hell are you all talking for.....”

All three turned to look, then two of the three quickly blushed and looked away. Whoever said that girls don’t wear oversized white t-shirts to bed in real life was a liar, and lived in a sad, delusional world.
Temari looked down, fixed her shirt so she was completely covered, and then barked, “That was your plan all along, wasn’t it!?”

Sasuke nodded, still red and looking away, “Yes, we woke you up so we could look at you and get yelled at. Because looking at you while you were asleep and quiet would have been horrible.”

“I am NOT small!” Naruto continued to whine, “I am a genin, now!”

“What does that have to do with anything, Naru-daddy?”

“Would you all get out so I can change?” Temari growled, huddled up in her blanket to hide herself from the prying eyes of the two males in the room.

Sullenly, the trio did as they were instructed. Naruto cast Crystal a downtrodden look, mumbling, “I’m only gonna get taller.....”

-

“What do we need code names for? That’s just stupid,” Sasuke groaned, wishing more and more Itachi had killed him, too.

“That is pretty stupid,” Temari agreed through an exasperated sigh.

“Is not!” Naruto and Crystal barked back. The girl of the two went on, “You underestimate Marcus WAY too much! He’s a smart guy. If we use our real names and get overheard, he can use them to find out where you’re really from, and then the plan goes up in smoke!” She explained.

“Wait,” Sasuke spoke up, “So are you saying you need to be a ‘smart guy’ to be king pimp?”

“Of course!”

Sasuke, Temari, and Crystal all turned to look at Naruto, who was currently wielding Kareem’s cane. This was the ultimate proof that you didn’t need to be a smart guy to be a king pimp. He had the cane raised up towards the sky, light scattering through the gem at the top, casting beams of purple light in every direction. Naruto commanded the heavens, “Mackify the nonbeliever!”

And so they stood like that for a good minute and a half, staring at Naruto like he had just sprouted fourteen additional baby makers in the form of rabid tentacles. It should also be noted that tentacles are creepy as hell when used for recreational and or reproductive ends. Finally, Sasuke managed to break through the barrier of being stupefied, and asked, “Mackif.....”

He trailed off when the brim of a hat fell over his eyes. His clothes, also, suddenly felt much silkier and a lot more purple than they had previously felt. Yeah, he could actually feel the purple.
“What the hell just happened?” Temari looked from Sasuke to Naruto, then back.

“He raised the scepter of love, of course!” Crystal laughed as though it were a stupid question.

“I mackified the nonbeliever,” Naruto replied succinctly.

“Is there a shot for that?” Sasuke asked weakly, not fixing his hat. He was terribly frightened that he was wearing the same clothes as Naruto. That would suck really bad, because then he’d be wearing all purple, a wide-brimmed purple hat complete with a feather, and horrible, shiny, purple shoes. It would suck doubly hard because.....

“Aw, you and Naru-daddy are wearing matching clothes!”

“Do you remember that time you left me at Anko’s, Naruto?”

“Yeah.”

“This is worse than that.”

“Wait, wait, wait,” Temari growled, “So are you trying to tell me that the cane has magical powers, too?”

“Yep, that’s about the truth of it. Marcus wanted to kill Kareem to get his cane. After the epic pimp battle, however, he was too wounded to get it before I took it and ran.”

“Wow, that’s just about the least likely thing I’ve ever heard,” The Uchiha pointed out.

“Says the boy who just magically got decked out in purple clothes.”

“Right. So, code names, then?”

-

The code names were decided after a long debate on whether or not ramen qualified as golden, bronze, or yellow. As they were holding the aforementioned debate, Crystal and Temari served as guides of sorts, leading them around the small village that had still not been given a name. Neither ninja cared enough to ask, though, because any village that would host a lesbian magazine’s photo shoot in broad daylight either had no morality, or the best leader in the history of leaders. So, it really boiled down to defining immorality or taking a history lesson. Names weren’t that important, anyway.

Their covering of the entire village took as long as it would normally take one to survey an entire village, which meant they still had a few hours to kill before the sun would take the hint and get lost. There were a number of useful ways they could have spent this time. For example, they could have gone over escape plans in the event that something went wrong. A place where they could all meet up in case the good doctor’s bar fell under attack. They could have discussed in further detail the plan for tonight. The basic knowledge that was being passed around was that they were going to lure one of Marcus’ men out with Temari, who was stealing her third consecutive customer. With the unwilling informant, they would find where Marcus was hiding and.....then what? They never really discussed that part. It was like looking for a cup that you didn’t need anything for. Once you get the cup, what then? Put it down and go play video games, or something. That didn’t sound like it would work, here. These were just some of the things they could have, and probably should have, done. What did they do, instead?

“Down it while it’s cold, ladies,” The bartender chuckled, sliding a couple of glasses across the shiny wooden surface the four were currently perched at. The two women caught their drinks, and both took a long drink at the same time.

Naruto was currently pinching his nose closed, as the place smelled rather strongly of tobacco and unpaid child support. He was rapidly learning that not many bars smelled good. Sasuke was having similar thoughts, only his pertained more to the awkward clashing of the red tiled floor with the rest of the bright wood furniture. .....Only masculine.

While in-between fervid gulps of her drink, Temari was watching the two boys through the corner of her eye. Since Sasuke and Naruto were ninjas, they knew they were being watched. It also helped that they had the power of sight, of course, but being a ninja was always a plus.

“What?” Naruto finally asked.

The girl lowered her drink, and said, “You two look like little kids with your chocolate milk.”

Naruto pointed at her, then retracted his hand to wipe away a chocolatey mustache before pointing again, “Chocolate milk is for winners!”

“Yeah,” Sasuke mumbled, “And you look like a broken whore, guzzling down whatever horse piss that guy keeps pouring you, but WE didn’t feel the need to point it out.” Sasuke raised his hand, and Naruto slapped him a high five. Neither one broke their lock on Temari’s eyes.

Like before when there were many things they could have done, there were many things that Temari could have done, right then. They were to laugh at the two, ignore the two, threaten bodily harm to the two, cause bodily harm to the two, or E. Like on many multiple choice tests, there is always that ‘All of the above’ or ‘None of the above’ or ‘A and B’ or ‘Other’. That’s typically the fifth selection. Temari picked E.

She opened her mouth to say something mean back, faltered, closed her mouth, and repeated. Her failures caused her to turn a little red, but her anger made her turn really red. Oh, yeah, there was the embarrassment kicking in. Now she was really, really red. Yep, he called her a whore. Uh huh, there was the shame.

Sasuke wasn’t immune to everything. Some things got to him on an emotional level, even if they did usually have to be singing about vacations. It’s all he ever wanted. .....Vacation, have to get away.....He stopped singing to himself in his head, trying to figure out where he was in his thoughts. Oh, right. Some things got to him on an emotional level. Teary-eyed, angry blondes wasn’t one of them.

“Oh, I’m sorry, whore wasn’t a very nice word for me to use,” The Uchiha shrugged a little, “I probably should have said something more like floozy or skank.”

“Uh, Sasuke?” Naruto poked his friend on the arm, “Maybe you should stop.....”

Temari stood up in a huff, and a couple of tears actually fell from her eyes, “I have to pee!” She announced rather ungraciously, hurrying off to the back.

Crystal stood up as well, “I’ll go with her, you meanies.”

Both remaining sort-of-patrons were now at a sort-of-loss for words. They continued to sip their awesome drinks every now and then, but even the glory of the chocolate milk was diminished in the presence of the glaring fact that Sasuke had just made Temari cry. Both had thought that impossible, and logic told them that they were probably under a genjutsu, right now, but logic wasn’t always right. Only every other time. Naruto finally broke the silence.

“Do you ever wonder why girls go to the bathroom together?”

Sasuke, relieved that they weren’t going to discuss what had just happened, replied, “Actually, yeah. I have a tough time going when there’s someone else in the room, even if they’re a latrine or two away from me.”

“Yeah, it’s weird,” Naruto concurred, “But you know what? I think Temari was lying.”

“Lying about what?”

“About having to pee.”

Sasuke knew that Naruto was probably right. Sure, she might handle that while she was in there, but the main reason she left was to clean herself up and hide that she was crying. Yep, there was the guilt. .....And there was the shame. Great. Then, before the guilt overwhelmed him and forced him to apologize (Something the Uchiha clan was never very acclaimed for excelling in), Naruto continued.

“I mean, think about it. Girls obviously can’t pee.”

The prodigy froze up, his mind started buzzing as he tried to figure that one out. How DID girls pee? They didn’t have the right equipment to tend to such manly affairs, so what on earth did they do in the bathroom? Sure, they could always SAY they were going to pee, while they really wanted to take care of their numbers twos.....Or would that be number ones for girls? But if they couldn’t pee (Which they quite obviously were physically incapable of doing), then where did all of the water and stuff that they drank go? Their bodies needed to get rid of the liquids somehow, right? Otherwise they would eventually explode. And since neither one had seen very many girls exploding, they figured that must not be the case. One way that they were all familiar with was to sweat. That wasn’t the solution to this problem, however, because in their experiences, girls sweat less than boys do. Another way was to.....That was it!

“That’s why girls cry so much!” Both boys announced loudly, each one pumping a fist into the air.

“It makes perfect sense. Now I get why girls cry so much more than guys do,” Naruto grinned to himself, taking a small sip of his drink, which once again tasted rich with success and happiness.

“It’s not because society forces onto men and women different standards of acceptable social behavior!” Sasuke laughed, “It’s because they need to get the juice out.....”

Naruto slapped his hands onto the table, “THAT’S why they have periods! THAT’S why they get all emotional during their periods!”

“Oh, damn,” Sasuke sucked in a mouthful of air, so surprised was he, “They have periods so they can flush it all out.”

“It makes perfect sense.”

“What a breakthrough.....”

They raised their glasses high in triumph, and gave a toast to periods. The only thing that kept women alive.

“Well, it’s good to see you two butt heads being so chummy and happy!” Crystal interrupted their glorious epiphany.

They both turned to find her standing there, hands on her hips, clearly displeased with them.

“Butt heads?” Sasuke wondered at the odd name calling.

“Naru-daddy, please go in there and talk to her. I can’t get her to stop, and the sun’s starting to set. It’s almost time to meet the client,” The prostitute warned her pimp, who rose from his stool.

“I can’t go in there, are you kidding me?” He blurted, “It’s the GIRL’S room.....”

“Oh, please, act your age, Naru-daddy.....” Crystal ho-hummed his worry and started dragging him towards the bathrooms.

“He IS acting his age!” Sasuke said, but not too loudly. Better that Naruto be sacrificed to fix his mistake than he.

Naruto briefly considered using the sexy no jutsu, but decided against it. Now that he knew what needed to be excluded in it, he knew he would probably never use that terrible, terrible technique ever again. Ever. He didn’t get past that promise to himself before he was tossed into the bathroom, where he landed on his face.

He sat himself up, then really paid attention to the fact that he was on the bathroom floor in a bar, and jumped to his feet. Only the one stall was closed out of the possible four, and the sound of crying was coming from only one stall, so Naruto was able to figure out pretty quickly where his temporary prostitute was. Before he addressed that situation, he took a good hard look around the bathroom. Not a latrine in sight.

“I knew it,” He breathed, wandering over to the stall’s door. Prepared to handle the crying girl like a man (Not by leaving the room and hiding from her until she’s better, the other way), Naruto knocked on the stall door, “Are you alright?” He asked timidly.

“N-Naruto, what the hell are you doing in here?” The girl sniffed noticeably, trying to toughen her voice up by clearing her throat. He could hear her rubbing her face on her sleeves.

“Crystal said you were a little upset, so.....here I am. In the girl’s bathroom. With you. Right now.”

“That’s just great,” She exhaled slowly, “Why don’t you just leave me alone, ok? I’m just going to clean up, and then we can go and take care of that.....client, and then everything will be great. Ok? Just leave me alone.....”

Naruto really wanted to do that. Nothing sounded better than abandoning the restroom and returning to his drink, which was probably getting a tad too warm for his own liking. So.....why wasn’t he moving? He tried to get his feet to move, to lead him on his happy way to the door. For a moment he thought maybe his shoes were stuck to something crusty on the floor. He was proven correct when he looked down to find absolutely nothing. His feet were stuck to the floor by stupid, crusty chivalry.

“I think I’m ok right here, for a little while,” He admitted, trying his hardest to hide the disappointment in his voice. Sadly, his feet found themselves miraculously unstuck so long as he moved no further away from the stall. He put his back to it to lean and went quiet.

“I’ll be out in a minute!” The girl growled.

Naruto sighed, “What, you want me to time you? Come out when you’re ready.”

“Get out!”

“I can’t.”
“Why the hell not!?”

He could hear the frustration building in her voice, but still he didn’t budge. “Because my friend is crying in a bathroom stall in some random bar after a joke got sent her way. Like hell I’d just leave you in here alone, come on.”

Naruto was flung away from the door as it burst open. He teetered across the room and up against the wall. He was pretty afraid of the morbid idea of falling back onto the bathroom floor. God knows how many diseases he had picked up from the first time. He caught his balance on the wall by the door, but didn’t get to turn around. Temari slammed herself up against him, digging her face into his shoulder and clutching onto the back of his shirt.

“Naruto.....I don’t want to do this, anymore.....” She sobbed onto him. He could feel her shaking and how his shoulder was getting moist.

“Hey, whoa,” Naruto tried to move a little, but Temari was holding on too tight, “It’s alright, it’s alright. What don’t you want to do, anymore?”

“THIS! I don’t want to do this mission anymore! I can’t do it anymore, no more, no more.....” She started to slide down to the ground, so Naruto went down along the wall with her.

“Ok, hey, that’s fine. You don’t have to do anything, Sasuke and I can handle it,” He whispered, bringing an arm up to put on the back of her head. It was difficult to console someone who was behind you.

“You need my help,” She said, “I have to do it.”

“Why don’t you want to do it, anymore? I don’t understand. What’s so awful about it that it could make you feel so bad?”

She squeezed his shirt a little tighter and replied, “All of the things they do to me.....I know it’s not real, I know I’m not really doing them, but it.....it still feels bad, and I still see it.....and I know it, what they do, and how they look at me.....” She trailed off into a fit of sobs.

Then it all came crashing down on Naruto like a ton of bricks. What the Mr. Ichiraku from this village had said.....

“They want you to sell their.....services.....to buyers.....and such. You get royalties, which basically means you get a cut, so long as you find them work.”

What Asuma had said, when he asked how much sex cost.....

“Depends on the girl. Some want a forty dollar date, others want a trip to some islands, or something. Thing is, sex never comes free.”

And now what Temari had just said. Oh. God. No.

He got a little rougher than he would have liked to break free of Temari’s grip, turning so that he was now front to front with her. He put his hands on her arms and his forehead to hers. Her face was stained with tear-trails. Quietly as he could without her being unable to hear him, he asked, “Do these clients.....do they pay you for.....”

Temari nodded, looking him dead on as she continued to leak from the eyes.

He slid his arms around her back and pulled her into a hug, which she returned. She resumed her crying, and now Naruto knew why. He had felt badly when Sakura and Ino had made that bet with each other, back in the tent that rainy night. He had felt used and sort of valueless. How much more so would it be for Temari, then, who had been dealing with the feeling for months? No wonder she wanted to quit.....

Naruto’s head banged the wall as Temari pushed against him, pressing her mouth over his. He didn’t get what was happening fro about two seconds, at which point he tried to get away. His back to the wall, he tried to stand up and get away, but Temari rose with him, still kissing him. He took hold of her shoulders and pushed her off a step, “What are you doing?” He gasped for fresh air.

“Isn’t that what you want from me, too?” The girl asked, trying to go back in for another one.

“No!” Naruto held her off, “Look, you’re drunk! You had like, three or four drinks, but you’re definitely still drunk! Come on, I’m taking you back to the good doctor.” He swept down and scooped Temari up. Now over his shoulder, she continued to cry and protest.

Naruto danced her out into the bar and called out to Sasuke, “It’s up to you guys! I’m taking Crow home, now. Good luck!”

“Hey, wait!” Sasuke rose from his stool, “Where are you going, Nar-” He stopped when Crystal elbowed him in the side, “I mean, Golden Shower, we need you!”

“I still don’t think that name came from when he watched that bowl of ramen falling, yesterday.....” Crystal giggled.

Out of nowhere, a girl with a large coke in her hand said, “Give me an hour or two, I’ll help you out.”

“I said I needed Golden Shower, not another fangirl!”

“I know what you said,” The girl nodded, taking a long sip from her straw.

“Don’t worry, Darkside,” Naruto called back to is friend, “I’ll be back as soon as I can. You guys take care of your business!” And he was gone.
“And he’s gone. Great. Now what the hell do we do? .....I swear to God, girl, quit looking at me!” Sasuke barked at the coke-bearing girl.

“You’re the ninja, smarty-pants!” Crystal whispered, “You figure something out!”

Sasuke, using the powers of being a prodigy, thought up a quick idea. He’d just use the transformation jutsu. No problem. “Come on,” He took Crystal by the arm, “Take me to the meeting place. I’ve got it covered.”

-

Naruto dropped Temari onto her bed, then sat himself on the end of it. She had quit crying and wiggling about halfway back, and he assumed that she had just tuckered herself out, like a little kid. He rubbed his forehead, trying to get the last things she had said out of his head. It didn’t work. She had told him that a lot of the men she wound up being hired for were considered good men. She named some of their positions in the village, too, and Naruto had to admit it. They did sound like good men. They had jobs that were important, and some of them even had families. But.....they did things to Temari that made her cry. Things that Naruto didn’t want to know about. So.....those men definitely weren’t good men.

“Not good men at all,” Naruto whispered, “Not at all. I’m sorry.....”

Temari opened one of her eyes to look at Naruto’s back, but let him keep thinking she was asleep. She’d also keep letting him think she was drunk. Anything to get her out of this. He was really very sweet for not trying to put any moves on her, especially now, since he could easily think he had a shot. He was also very sweet for not trying to take advantage of her in the bathroom, when she had given him a pretty open opportunity. He was a nice guy.

-

Sasuke, no done up as Temari through his masterful transformation jutsu, followed after Crystal through the dark streets towards their destination.

“You know,” She started, “You look really-”

“Shut up,” Sasuke interrupted.

“No, really, you look-”

“Shut up.”

“Ok,” Crystal drew him off to the side, “This is the place.”

Sasuke looked around for any sign of anything odd. A bush, a couple of buildings, a few power poles, a pair of shoes hanging from one of the power lines.....He pointed at the shoes, “I thought that meant this was a place to meet dealers for drugs?”

“That’s just a silly rumor we started to get people to think that. That way, no one will get suspicious of what’s really going on,” Crystal explained.

“That doesn’t make any sense at all, drugs are illegal, so wouldn’t you want to spread the rumor about something else? Like selling cookies, or something innocent like that?”

“Here comes our man,” Crystal pointed at the oncoming man with the tip of her head. Safely hidden around the corner of a building, they were nigh invisible! Sure enough, someone intercepted the man. It appeared to be another man. But.....Sasuke recognized this man!

“U-Uh oh.....” Crystal stammered, shrinking back, “It’s Marcus! I can’t believe he showed up here, himself! What do we do, Darkside!?”

Sasuke, eyes wide, looked from the man to Crystal, then back to the man. “That’s.....that’s Marcus? You have got to be bull shi-”


-----Author’s other note: After many, many months of not updating this story, I have done the unthinkable. Updated. Thank you for all of the emails and things I have gotten telling me to get off my ass and write. I actually got one from someone last night, sat myself down, and did it up. Snarl, you know who you are, points to you. Thanks for reading.....-----