Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Life and Love in Konoha ❯ Oh my god! ( Chapter 8 )

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. I know I was shocked the first time I read this too. Wait a minute what did I just say? Sweet holy mother of god and all her wacky little nephews.

 

Author's Notes: I thought I ought to get a comical chapter in before the whole dramatic chapter that's coming up. Sorry about the wait I've been having a rough month. The whole thing at the end of the chapter (the Sakura on Hinata action, not their plan. But what if that is the plan. Hmm? Good question.) is a joke but maybe I might make it happen, I am that perverted.

 

 

“Hinata! Naruto! Wake you have visitors.” Kakashi's came up the stairs Hinata rolled out of bed and wearily got dressed.

 

“We'll be down in a minute!” She kissed Naruto. “Hey wake up sleepy head. Someone's here to visit us.” He rolled over and she flipped him off the mattress. “Come on!” He groggily stood and got dressed. Hinata walked down stairs and saw Kiba and Shino. “Hey guys.”

 

Shino was the first to speak because Kiba was stunned by the revealing outfit she had on. “Hello Hinata we just figured since we haven't seen you in awh-wh-WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WEARING?!” Shino suddenly yelled jumping back.

 

“Just a yukata.” Hinata shrugged as she walked down and sat on the couch closely followed by Naruto.

 

“There is no yukata on earth that's that…that skimpy.” Shino said looking like a herd of elephants just ran past him, then backed up and robbed him.

 

“This one is. So how's life on the outside?”

 

“Not too bad.” Kiba said recovering. “Miss having you around since I'm stuck with bug boy all day now.”

 

“That's good to hear I kind of miss y'all to. Maybe after this is done we could go on a mission for old times sake.”

 

“Sounds good to me. What do you think Shino?”

 

“Just not in that outfit…I mean it's not that it doesn't look good on you but you're like our sister it's just…” He shuddered.

 

“Oh come on. It's not like I'm straddling Naruto…although.” She got a glimmer in her eye.

 

“Hinata for the love of god!” Kiba screamed

 

“What it's nothing different from what you'd do to a girl. Accept that night when he…” Kiba and Shino covered there ears and Hinata made some very suggestive gestures (use your imagination) before stopping looking hot and bothered. They took this as a sign that it was safe to uncover their ears. “And then he shoved his hand…” Shino hit then ground and Kiba collapsed limply on the couch frothing from the mouth. “I was just kidding jeez you two need to loosen up.”

 

“Says the girl who used to not be able to talk to Naruto.” Kiba said shaking his head.

 

“Well I got over that. Thanks for sending him after me. But never send anyone after me when I tell you I'm taking a shower again.”

 

“Wait a minute Kiba you knew the whole time?” Naruto looked up.

 

“Well yeah. I had Shino made sure no one attacked or peeped at Hinata while I got you. Worked like a charm.”

 

“You can say that again. You've tainted Hinata.” Shino said smiling though no one could see it.

 

“She needed to be tainted. If she was any more introverted she would have been turned inside out.”

 

“I'm not quite sure what you just said.” Shino said cocking his head slightly. “Anyway she acting like she's about to get naked and throw Naruto to the ground.”

 

“Is that you giving me the okay?” Hinata looked hopeful.

 

“Not till we leave please. See now she's an exhibitionist.”

 

“Who's possessed?” Naruto asked.

 

“No not exorcist…never mind.” Shino sighed.

 

“Kurenai wanted us to tell you that she's going to visit you tomorrow. Now her and Asuma are…I think it had something to do with checking her bedroom for that guy Itachi.” Kiba sniggered slightly but saw the look on Hinata's face. “I-I sorry Hinata I know he's not someone to joke about.” Kiba suddenly looked like a basset hound.

 

“No Kiba. It's fine. I'm okay it's just hard to hear his name. Don't worry about it.”

 

“Well I guess we should go. See you later Hinata.” Shino stood and walked with Kiba to the door. They turned and saw Naruto pinned to the ground under Hinata.

 

 

Sakura woke up to find Sasuke reading and book. She blinked a few times and saw that it was Itcha itcha paradise. “What the hell are you doing with one of Kakashi's books?”

 

“Trying to figure out if we could do this position.” He showed her the illustration at the beginning of the chapter. “I'm not even sure if this is right side up.”

 

She grabbed the book. “Well I think I might be able to get my legs that far but I don't know how easy anything beyond that point would be kind of difficult.” She sat the book on her nightstand maybe later they could try it. She yawned and looked at the clock. “Noon. I guess we should get up.”

 

“I'm in no hurry.” Sasuke said scooting closer to her.

 

“Sasuke I think I'm pregnant.” Sakura said looking away from him.

 

Sasuke screamed and fell off the bed. “Wha-Are you sure it's yours…mine?” Sakura wasn't paying attention. She was laughing hysterically. “What are you…Oh ha ha, very funny. You could have given me a heart attack.” He climbed back onto the bed and pinned Sakura down. “You realize that the if I didn't love you…I'd…I'm not quite sure where I'm going with this. Being on top of you distracts me.” He smiled and kissed her. Slowly working his way down.

 

“Sasuke Sakura we were wandering if you'd…like to come…I mean…go down on…to lunch.” Hinata said as Naruto stared at the couple.

 

“Oh…uh, thanks. We'll be right down.” Sakura said. As Sasuke back his face from between Sakura's legs and slid her panties back up.

 

Naruto and Hinata stepped outside and started laughing. “Did you see her face? She looked like she was about to die.”

 

“That was nothing compared to Sasuke. One eye bugged, the other one was twitching.”

 

“His tongue was still sticking out of his mouth. Oh my god. Did you notice something? Pink really is her natural hair color.” Hinata walked off and Naruto was standing for a full minute before he figured out what she meant.

 

 

They sat down at the table followed closely by Sasuke and Sakura. Sasuke and Sakura were splitting an order of dumplings. Naruto tried to fix Ramen but Kakashi apprehended him. “Hinata if it's not too much trouble could you get him to eat his vegetables.” She smiled and nodded.

 

“But…Ramen.” Hinata leaned over and whispered something in his ear. He suddenly got a goofy grin on his face and snatched the salad Kakashi held out.

 

“Hinata…what exactly did you say to him?” Sakura asked looking apprehensive.

 

“Well I said that if he ate them I'd…” She whispered something in Sakura's ear.

 

Sakura looked repulsed. “That is manipulative and sick! And I bet it'll work on Sasuke.” Sakura turned and smiled to the young Uchiha. He smiled back looking interested.

 

“I'm trying to eat here.” Kakashi said gaping at his students. “My god I trained a bunch of sick minded shinobi.”

 

“Say's the Jounin who's sleeping with a fifty year old women.” Sasuke said smirking.

 

“And reads porn on a daily basis.” Sakura grinned.

 

“And who lost his virginity to Anko.” Hinata said.

 

“WHAT?!” Screamed the others.

 

“Oops. I didn't mean to say that.”

 

“Hold the phone.” Sakura turned to Kakashi. “Is that true?”

 

“I…well, that is to say. Sort of.” His students stared at him as though expecting a story.

 

“Well the way Kurenai sensei tells it: the two of them wandered of together one day and when Kakashi came back, his innocence had been demolished.” Hinata said nonchalantly.

 

“Really. I don't even want to think about what she did. And yet I want to know.”

 

“I'm not telling you. If you want to find out so bad got over to her house. She's got no problem with girls or groups…did I just say that.” Kakashi started back tracking. “I mean…I was just kidding. It was a joke ha ha ha…ha? You're not going to buy that are you?” They shook their heads. “How does Kurenai know anyway…and why did she tell her students.”

 

“You'd be amazed at how easy it is to eavesdrop when you can see people's lips through a wall.” Hinata smiled. “Anko likes to brag about her sex life. She even offered to help me `loosen up' once. Kurenai didn't think that would be a good idea.”

 

“Yeah you would have stopped chasing me and went for Sakura…dude that'd be hot.” Naruto said with another goofy grin.

 

“Naruto! Argh…Me and Sasuke are going to murder you.” She turned to Sasuke who had an identical grin.

 

“Hold it Sakura the boy might be on to something.” He said turning from her to Hinata.

 

“Sasuke…pervert. That's it I cutting you off!”

 

“You can't last a day without me inside you.”

 

“What's the problem? It sounds fine to me.” Hinata said over her Ramen.

 

“And that's my cue to run.” Kakashi said leaving the table. “I'm going to need therapy after living with you guys.”

 

The guys gazed hopefully at Sakura. “Not happening. Hinata what the hell was that about?”

 

“I don't know. I've never been with a girl and the boys seemed to like the idea so I figured…why the hell not?” She said blushing slightly.

 

“That's disturbing. Not that you would be at the top of my list is I was bi.”

 

“How do you know you're not if you haven't tried?” Asked Naruto, earning a fist to the face.

 

“What he makes a valid point it's not like it's cheating on me. Not with a girl.” Sasuke got knocked on his ass.

 

“Jeez. Fricken perverts!” Sakura said as she stormed off. “Hinata how can we date such idiot's?”

 

“Why wasn't she included in the whole perverts thing?” Asked a half conscious Naruto.

 

“Because she doesn't want to jack of to two girl's going at it.”

 

“Any normal guy would though.” Sasuke said imploringly.

 

“Don't push yuri luck Sasuke.” Sakura called back. “Now just get the idea out of your heads because it's not happening.”

 

“Hey Sakura?” Hinata said grinning.

 

“Hmm?” Sakura replied.

 

“How good are you at the bushinn no jutsu (clone jutsu)?” She whispered so the boys wouldn't hear.

 

“I can make a few pretty convincing copies, why?”

 

“I think we should…” She whispered. (You'll find out soon.) “What do you think?” She asked loud enough for Naruto and Sasuke to hear. “Maybe tomorrow after lunch?”

 

“It's a date Hinata. Just don't let the boys find out what we're up to.”

“I wouldn't dream of it. But them watching would be hot.” She pulled Sakura in for a kiss. Naruto and Sasuke watched stunned as Hinata's hands ran over Sakura for a moment. “See you then.” She called as she vanished into her room.

 

“No telling.” Sakura called.