Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ WTF!!! The Rokudaime's Pregnant?! ❯ WTF!!! The Rokudaime's Pregnant?! ( Chapter 5 )

None of the characters below belongs to me…

Not a single one of them. The idea is though…

That thought comforts me a little…

Enjoy, you sadistic bastards…

 

 

 

Never Compete With the Fox in O-Ero-ken no Jutsu.

By: c7bi_kyuubi

 

The boys will always be boys. No matter how old they are, how high up they are, how cool-and-don't-ruin-my-cool-reputation they are, they will always remain boys. Even when they reach manhood, they will still be boys. And when Uzumaki Naruto, the current Rokudaime of Konoha returns home to find not only his husband, Uchiha Sasuke, but almost the entire (male casts of Naruto) male population that is considered cool and not so cool in their living room, crowding on the crouch, ceiling, floor or leaning on the walls, watching…

 

Football…

 

Naruto, as the Rokudaime whose work is quite tiring, as Tsunade baa-san found out when she became Godaime Hokage, thought he would return home, cuddle with his much beloved husband, eat some dinner, hopefully ramen as Sasuke doesn't let him eat any of those no matter how delicious they are considered by Naruto or anyone else due to his condition which is growing everyday, then collapse in bed with said husband and cuddle some more before sleeping.

 

But no, he had to come back to hooting, swearing, men jumping up and down on the couch or banging/bouncing off the wall, dropping off the ceiling, more swearing and cussing at the huge wall covering TV screen. Dropping his keys as well as his jaws, Naruto stared at the scene in front of him and a few swear words came to mind but he wouldn't want to say it less Sasuke beat him up for exposing their child to bad language. Naruto had argued that when their child is born, he is going to be exposed to bad language sooner or later and one needs to know bad language to vent out their frustration or anger on. After that was said, Sasuke's Sharingan immediately activated and the three commas started swirling around making Naruto dizzy and wonder why Sasuke was so mad.

 

After a yelling match with Naruto winning eventually, (Sasuke can't possibly hope to win against the one carrying his heir and child) with the help of the adorable puppy dog eyes and a sulky pout (Sasuke can't win against these as well… why? Because it's Naruto who's the one making these faces and he's cute and adorable enough without them…) which ended up making the situation worse in a good kind of way.

 

After melting when he saw Naruto's face, Sasuke promptly lunged at Naruto and started nibbling and kissing him while carrying him up the big staircase in front of the main door to the Uchiha mansion, and up to their bedroom before ravishing him. (At least he had the decency to carry him to their bedroom before doing it in the living room like the last time before he found out Naruto was pregnant… Ahh… newlyweds…) They spent the rest of the day and most of the night going at it and the result is a crowd of disgruntled villagers who couldn't sleep due to the noise -ahem- … Naruto and Sasuke were making.

 

And so, (getting a little off topic here…) Naruto closed his mouth, picked up his keys and strode to the living room where all the hooting came from. “WHAT THEFUCK IS GOING ON HERE?!?” He shouted.

Immediately, heads turned and gaped at the pissed and pregnant Hokage. A stoic as usual Hyuuga Neji, Lee who was in a very uncomfortable contortionist position, Kiba stuffing his face with popcorn with Akamaru, Shino (keeping track of all the bets going on in the notebook he was holding), Sasuke, Gaara, Kankuro, Kakashi, a sheepish Iruka, drunken Jiraiya, Genma, Raido and a few other chuunin and Jounin and a couple of ANBUs here and there went, “Umm…”

 

Then the excuses flew at him head on. Naruto staggered from the sheer impossibility of the situation, with Kakashi coming up with the stupidest excuse of all as usual. “Well, Pakkun got lost then I decided to go look for him. Iruka volunteered of course and then I saw a black cat passing through the bushes in your garden and I thought maybe it had seen Pakkun and then I went to find the cat that suddenly was in your house. I decided to pop in and ask it b-”

 

“ENOUGH!!” Naruto bellowed stopping the excuses from trampling his brain molecules. `I'm going to bed.' He thought and trudged off heading towards the huge king sized four poster bed he and Sasuke shared. After a few cups of ramen of course. Just as he was about to eat his ramen (which he hadn't had in the four months he was pregnant because of Sasuke), who should appear but Sasuke who appeared out of nowhere and took away his ramen and replaced it with what Naruto dubbed the food of torture or stupid fuckin' wabbit food. (It's a diet prepared by Tsunade herself and it doesn't only have vegetables. It's just Naruto hates it so much he called it that name…)

 

“NOOOOO! GIMME BACK MY RAMEN!!” he howled loud enough to send the harmless innocent rabbits outside to fall over twitching, foaming at the mouth.

 

“No. You're not supposed to eat these and you know it as well as I do that it is not healthy for the baby.”

 

“It won't hurt the baby you idiot any I haven't had any in four months! It's not like I eat it everyday for every meal! (though I would like to)” Naruto protested with a well aimed puppy look.

 

Sasuke staggered under `the look' and nearly gave in but was rescued by the shout of “GOAL!!!” in the living room. He straightened while Naruto cussed under his breath. He curled up into a ball in the corner surrounded in gloom with his chin resting on his knees (he won't be able to do that in a few months) and pouted with his bottom lip sticking out. Sasuke obviously thought that he was so cute that he went and kissed him after disposing of the ramen.

 

`How did he get this? I thought I got rid of all the ramen in the house and the shops know better than to sell him some. Never mind, I'd better take him to see Tsunade tomorrow.' Sasuke thought as he went over to Naruto.

 

Naruto jumped as he was suddenly pulled up and his eyes widened as Sasuke swooped down and gave him a full blown kiss that sent him melting into a puddle. Things were getting hot and Sasuke had managed to get Naruto out of his Hokage coat and is proceeding onto his robes when a few catcalls and hoots distracted him from his `treasure hunt'. Turning around, he saw their audience had evidently ALL come out from the living room to watch a better show (advertisement is currently on, not football). Kiba and Shino were even using a camcorder to record them. Naruto turned beet red and yelled, “Perverts!” Before storming off after sending them scattering off and a few that didn't move fast enough embedded in the wall.

 

Sasuke sighed and glared at the few that came back. Kiba and Shino had gone and made some copies of the tape and sent them all over town. Cried of dismay from ever hopeful Sasuke fan girls and boys, cries of happiness from yaoi fans and Kakashi together with Jiraiya studying it for inspiration on the next `Icha Icha Paradise' book. Soon they all settled down and focused on the television as the advertisement finished.

 

Naruto, planning on a revenge crept into the room just as the team they were rooting for were about to make a goal, popped up in front of the TV to the astonishment of his audience and did his famous `O-Ero-ken no jutsu.

 

Nosebleeds flowed and quite a few went into blissful oblivion with Kakashi and Jiraiya making notes again and a few pissed cool people, namely Sasuke, Neji, Gaara and Shino. “NYAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! TAKE THAT YA BASTARDS FOR PEEPING!!!” then he added as an afterthought, “AND FOR ME NOT EATING RAMEN!”.

 

“Naruto…” the four on the couch growled. Naruto changed back with a poof from the naked blonde headed girl he was before. The Jounins and ANBUs that were too composed and experienced in surprise attacks didn't fall into blissful oblivion focused their whole attention on the scene unfolding before them along with a few chuunin sporting nosebleeds. This is going to be good. Kakashi with the help of Jiraiya, Genma and Raido struggled to restrain Iruka (with each holding a limb) who was hell bent on rearranging Naruto's head. Being Hokage doesn't stop Iruka from mothering Naruto.

 

“What? Bet you couldn't henge into that!” Naruto shouted pointing at the four glaring at him while blushing. Naruto crossed his arms and stood there. He had changed out of his Hokage outfit and is clad in a huge T-shirt and shorts.

 

“We could definitely do that!” Sasuke yelled back.

 

“Prove it!”

 

“Hah! Eat this!” Gaara yelled at Naruto. Kakashi whipped out a camcorder to record them.

 

“Henge!” Gaara went `poof' and as the chakra smoke cleared, a…

 

Furry human sized badger stood before them.

 

[Laughter all around…]

 

Gaara turned back and sat on the sofa glaring at everyone.

 

“Henge!” Neji said. And in his place, stood a pale-looking girl with the worst fashion sense anyone had ever saw.

 

“What the fuck is she wearing…”

 

(poof) “URUSAI!!! A fan girl that ambushed me was wearing this!” Neji screamed back in defense.

 

“Poor kid.” An ANBU commented.

 

Shino then yelled, “Henge!”

 

Everyone knew what was going to happen.

 

“I knew it.” Everyone said in unison.

 

A huge bug (imagine a Bikochuumon) stood in the place of Shino.

 

(silent poof) Shino turned back and sic his bugs on everyone that said `I knew it.'

 

[Many screams later…]

 

“Sasuke?” Naruto tentatively said watching a small smile on Sasuke's faraway day-dreaming face.

 

(POOF!!!) Everyone coughed as chakra smoke filled the room. When the smoke cleared, Sasuke and Naruto was no where to be seen.

 

“Where did they go?!?”

 

The question was answered by the shouts upstairs. “OH KAMI YES!!! YES!!! OHHHH!!!!!”

 

(multiple sweatdrops around)

 

Iruka and the rest had to forcibly restrain Kakashi and Jiraiya from spying on them or installing a hidden cam in the bedroom of Naruto and Sasuke. Everyone took this as the cue to leave.

 

 

 

 

The end of this chapter…

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