Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction ❯ Heaven Nor Hell ❯ Where am i? ( Chapter 2 )

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the plot, the characters belong to their respective owners and I don't have a biscuit crumb to give away because it all belongs to my family, I can't even eat a pie from my fr. . . my parent's fridge without asking then the only answer I get is no, your too fat, that's all I get. Anyway I don't own a thing . . . (flashback to the real world) "no mum get away and for the last time mum I'm not gay, no this isn't one of my gay stories . . ."(back to fanfic world) fans tell my mum I don't write gay stories <lie of you must, just tell her, she thinks I'm gay now . . . NNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO>

Heaven nor Hell 2

******DREAM*******

Kaworu dragged his feet through the brown and decaying mud, as he surveyed his surroundings, the place was desolate, barely ably to see past one meter due to the thick but strangely violet mists, tears poured down his face as he laid eyes on Shinji's deatheningly pale face, Shinji smiled as though in comfort the light that first captured Kaworu it their depths continued to star back from the face of his angel. Refusing to believe the only light of his grim world was about to depart from him Kaworu continued to walk, through the mud, through the encircling mists, through the pain, through the desire, through the love. Kaworu continued to walk on, Shinji's insistent tugging on his clothes finally caused Kaworu to look down into Shinji's gingerly smiling face, Shinji reached one hand up to caress Kaworu's tear stained face, Kaworu allowed a single sob to break from his lips. As Shinji opened his mouth as though to utter a sentence a rustling echoed throughout the wastelands, Kaworu's head snapped up as black ribbons flew towards Shinji's unprotected body. Shifting positions at a speed past human expectations he shielded Shinji's body with his own. Kaworu smiled as Shinji's face contorted in horror as he realized what Kaworu was about to do. Just as Kaworu raised his lips in a sad smile the black ribbons flowered from his chest. The tips of the ribbons were a multitude of point and those points split to form small white roses the size of fingernails, stained by Kaworu's own blood. Shinji stared in horror and looked up into Kaworu's pain filled yet satisfied features, in that brief instant Kaworu saw all the experiences with Shinji slash before his eyes, a cold tinkling laughter drove through Shinji's dreamlike state and as Shinji felt his body slip through Kaworu's arms and thud onto the ground Shinji finally screamed, a scream of utter torment that pushed Shinji's battered body to one last action of love, the slipping of Shinji's hand into Kaworu's own in the last act of defiance of destiny's plot to separate them. In an almost languid way the attackers slithered out of Kaworu's body. As Kaworu allowed Shinji's body to slip from his arms the ribbons found their target. Kaworu kept his hand around Shinji's own as he to slid to the ground the blood pooling around him the bloodied ground forming paths of blood into the mist enclosed darkness, as Kaworu drowned in Shinji's passion filled eyes, Shinji's hand was wrenched from his own, he could only watch in horror as they dragged his love away, Shinji winced in pain from the injuries he had already received before the attack. Dragging himself slightly forward he managed to slip his hand once more around Shinji's own and clung on as the ribbon's dragged them both along the ground. Shinji shook his hand as though wishing Kaworu to let go, a sob exploded unbidden from Shinji's dry lips.

Shinji- Don't Kaworu, if you loose too much blood you will die.

Kaworu- If they want you they must kill me first, I love you Shinji and if death plots to separate us then let him plot for he will only separate us in body, my soul will always reside in your body.

Shinji- As my soul in your.

A single black ribbon wrapped it's bloodied tip against Kaworu's wrist, Kaworu gasped as the ribbon tightened painfully cutting through his fleshinto his bone. Refusing to let go, Kaworu allowed his lifeblood from his wrist to joined the blood that marked Kaworu's passage. As Kaworu continued to look into Shinji's eyes, Shinji smiled as Kaworu continued to drown in Shinji's eyes, Shinji said a lone sentence:

Shinji- But I want you to live

Shinji allowed his fingers to open as the ribbon's pulled Kaworu's hand from Shinji's own and threw Kaworu back into the swirling mists. Kaworu forced himself to his feet the blood running in rivulets down his tattered and bloodied body, with his eyes trained on Shinji he reached out his bloodied fingertips to Shinji's own out reached fingers as his body once more thudded onto the ground as they dragged his beloved across the ground, his gaze never left Shinji's own. Kaworu forced his feet beneath his battered body once more lurching to his feet the blood turning from the red it had once been to the deep red almost black color that told Shinji it was too late for Kaworu to seek life as an option. Kaworu continued to stare into Shinji's eyes, even as Shinji's eyes widened in horror and a scream tore from his beloved's chest Kaworu never drew himself up from the ocean depths of Shinji's eyes, Kaworu never felt as the ribbons flew towards his neck and thudded into his unprotected human flesh, decapitating him, Kaworu's eyes still trained on Shinji's horrified face even as his eyes flew lifeless from his body rolling across the soil staining the ground with his flesh tissue. His head rightened on the cold earth as his eyes continued their ever-observant vigil on his love.

******END OF DREAM********

Kaworu's eyelids slowly forced their way open, his face strangely calm as the memories of his dreams flooded back, then the strangely realistic flare to the dream hit him, tears coursed down his cheeks and he sobbed bitterly into the bed covers. In the brief aftermath of the dream reality was dream and dream was reality for the heartbroken Kaworu. Shinji was dead and neither dream nor reality mattered anymore, all that meant anything was Shinji and Shinji was gone.

Lifting his head he surveyed his surroundings in puzzlement, then abruptly it hit him, he wasn't in the forest . . .

~-----------------------------~

Stirring from unconsciousness Shinji was shaken from the images of Kaworu's death. Shinji gingerly opened his eyes to face the ground as he felt pain assault him. Punches were laid on his body each one more brutal than the other, leaving bruises and his eyes widened as he felt steel tearing his flesh as he assailant worked into frenzy. Someone laughed behind him and Shinji closed his eyes unable or unwilling to comprehend the situation, the voice was so familiar. Opening his eyes wide he felt his clothes ripped away and something that felt like fingers push into his anus. His body clenching surprise as pain flowered between his legs. Shinji was a young and fragile young boy, still the age of 15 his body was still not even fully mature yet despite the innocence of his age even that would not stop this other young man from taking his body like a common whore. He felt the figure behind him laugh and he felt more fingers push into him, closing his eyes Shinji whimpered pain overloading his senses making him oblivious to any other sensations other than the breath taking pain that ripped through his inexperienced body. As the brutally dry fingers left his body he sighed in relief at the departure but the relief turned into overwhelming pain as thin fingers were replaced by the his tearing fist worming it's way into Shinji's fragile body. A scream of torment echoed throughout the room, Shinji felt his flesh rip and heard the dripping of his blood, how he did not know but all he could hear was the drip, drip, drip of blood that stained the earth. Suddenly Shinji slammed back into reality as the fist within his body flexed and he hear him whisper into his ears.

HIM- I won't kill you, your still too useful. I loved you so much but you betrayed me.

Shinji whimpered as the fist pulled out of his tortured body and the blood spilled onto the ground. Clenching his eyes tightly closed Shinji determinately clamped his teeth tightly shut as he was resolved not to let him have satisfaction from his screams and whimpers. Forcing his mind to retreat from the present, as his whole body was aflame with pain he succeeded but only for a few seconds before he felt a new shift of events. Shinji felt his body flipped onto his back and him kneel between his legs and he felt something that was definitely not a hand worm it's way into his orifice. It would take away the most precious thing that belonged to him. His eyes widening he laid eyes on him before he closed his eyes and forgetting his earlier resolution he scream, his wordless echoing cry tearing through the atmosphere more in torment than real physical pain. . . it was . . .him . . .

Shinji- NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO . . .

~-----------------------------~

Kaworu's reverie at his surroundings was shattered as he felt pain grip his chest and tear through his soul. A single word echoed through his heart. SHINJI.

The creature beside him looked at Kaworu in puzzlement. The creature looked like any other young man, his white hair cascading down his back in beautiful strands that seemed to reflect the light that radiated from his body. The young man's pale features were a direct contract to his dark and mysterious eyes making him look beautiful in his mysteriousness yet also strangely like a dead corpse. Kneeling beside Kaworu he frowned, he eyed Kaworu and laying a hand on his shoulder asked him.

Young man- Kaworu, What's wrong?

Kaworu's eye widened as he uttered a single word that bared his soul.

Kaworu- Shinji.

The young man frowned at Kaworu's words his own thoughts plaguing his mind at Kaworu's words; he should not be able to remember anything. The young man smiled at Kaworu and laid his hand on Kaworu's head, then Kaworu's eye clouded. The man asked Kaworu.

Young man- Who is Shinji?

Kaworu stared at the young man in confusion.

Kaworu- Who is Shinji?

Head lowered he smiled briefly in satisfaction before raising his head and feinting bafflement replied.

Young man- You just said his name.

Kaworu- Must have been nothing Nathiel.

Nathiel smiled in a false manner and lead Kaworu to his new home. Even as Kaworu uttered these words he felt a pressure on his chest. He felt as though he was forgetting something really important . . .

Author's note: sorry guys I don't know where this is going, we have to find out where Kaworu is, we have to find out who the person raping Shinji is, we have to find out why the fic's called heaven nor hell we have to find out whether I will kill off the lovers of allow a happy ending, darn it. All these what ifs and whens and whos are making my head spin. We even have to find out how to get my mum off the idea that I'm lesbian darn it. Sigh. I don't know what to do . . .

If you can send me an e-mail or a review, I don't know where I'm going with this so your ideas can maybe fuel a few of mine.

Suzume- I'm not sure whether I will make it a happy ending or kill one of them off. Have to see.

Jimi- I'm not really sure what the enemy is yet to tell the truth, I just let it flow but your giving me good ideas.

Kaworu X- Well your seeing or seen the next chapter of this hope you like it.

Nieko- Thank you for the praise. I like writing but I don't have much patience so put up with my starts and stops.

RiNoA-*- Thank you for the praise as well. I'm not killing Shinji off yet but I'm not sure in the future.

Krad- It's sad but their not dead yet, you have to put up with them for some time more.

Melissa- Calm down 12 year old, your fic is coming. Here's the next part enjoy.

Lady Jadi- Here's the next chapter, I did continue it, enjoy.

Guys enjoy my fic and hope you like it, this is my first fic so forgive me if it sucks.