Original Poetry Fan Fiction ❯ Poems ❯ Here I Am ( Chapter 7 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

By: kuchiku

Here I Am

Here I am,

Just here.

My life seems so bland,

My own fear.

Without that reason,

Without that purpose.

Summer is just another season,

My heart has sank to the dust.

Days go by and here I sit,

Wondering how much I've flown.

Allowing people around me to have their fit,

And I've held in my fits on my own.

Yes, I participate in life,

But…without that reason…I'm nothing.

Still far away from the knife,

I'm not alone, but I am, I can't fight myself to bring…

I can feel the water surround my throat,

I'm unable to breathe.

Like tar as thick as a fur coat,

Every gasp is from a heave.

This life I lead is sinking me down,

Too far from my security.

It's too deep, I know I'm going to drown,

I'm stuck in the world of reality.

Dead, but alive.

Alive, but dead.

For now, I must strive,

Strive to sleep in such a null and void bed.

`When will I feel it again?

When will I feel such passion?

Was it just a dream to make my heart mend?

Or was it just a flattering fashion?'

To say I'm sad is a lie,

But…I feel nothing right now.

I can feel the world pushing me to fly,

Yet the roots of my inexistent reason has me earth plowed.

Sinking even further into the ground,

I begin to forget the magic I once held so close to me.

To be able to make words dance around,

The way I could change them from sad to happy.

I was able to make myself feel like I was in the air,

Where no one could reach so high.

There, I didn't give a care,

I knew how to fly.

Every moment I breathed…

I breathed for them.

Now that I'm free, I no longer have to heave.

I no longer feel shame.

I know it's time to run,

It's time to become who I am to be.

It's time for me to have some fun,

Where it's just my own world and me.

I am my own savior,

I am my own love.

Where love will remain here,

Then I can truly reach heaven above.

Take what you've taken from me,

Because, to me, you're just there.

You mean nothing to me, happy?

There is nothing we can do, that seems fair.