Other Fan Fiction / Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ Distorted Perception ❯ Living in the Past ( Chapter 3 )

Chapter Three

Living in the Past

 

Considering their plans for the day, it was to be easygoing for once. There was no rush to pack and hurry off to their next destination in hopes of stopping the bad guys before they did something stupid again.

 

Cid had begrudgingly agreed to drop everyone off wherever they wanted to go. He, of course, was home and content on the Highwind, and didn't need to go anywhere. Tifa had suggested he make amends with Shera, but he grunted gruffly and brushed the comment off. Shera knew he cared for her, why else would he have stopped the damn launch so many years ago? Besides, he knew the woman would get all emotional. And he couldn't stand it if the last conversation between the two of them was mushy, instead of the usual condescending treatment he gave.

 

It was back to Wutai for Yuffie, and Red XIII had requested to spend his time in Cosmo Canyon. Tifa and Barret went together to visit Marlene. The longhaired young woman had been reluctant to part ways with Cloud. She had wanted their leader to join her. Her ill will at the predicament was eased somewhat when Aeris made her own plans to accompany Vincent to ShinRa Mansion. It was an unusual request from the mature woman, but Vincent really had no reason to refuse any of their company.

 

As the Highwind approach Nibelheilm the raven-haired gunman stood on the watch deck. It was a rather windy place to be, but it had the best view of the ship. From here, Vincent would be the first to see any sign of the mansion.

 

He hadn't planned on returning there so soon. Those walls held far too many bad memories. However, he'd taken Cloud's words to heart. Besides, he hadn't searched through the forgotten remnants of the mad scientist's life as thoroughly as he would have liked. There was still a chance that he might find some useful or insightful material.

 

Breathing in the fresh air he wondered if his life could ever contain more than despair. Perhaps if he knew the truth behind his sins, then he could be released from the chains of repentance. His chest hurt as he felt a flicker of hope within himself.

 

Squeezing his eyes shut to hold in the surge of emotions, he clutched his claw as a reminder of what he was. The hurt he felt was punishment. He deserved this lonely feeling and aching soul. It would not be right for him to hold hopes for anything but a life of darkness.

 

If only he knew why he must live in such a way.

 

His dark lashes became damp. Moving away from the railing, he huddled closer to the ship and away from the whipping winds. It was as though the closer they flew towards the grounds of his entrapment, the more his chest ached.

 

Vincent kept his eyes closed, as warm tears trailed down his pale cheeks. Swallowing the lump in his throat he cursed at his own weakness. A soul as hideous and wretched as his should not be feeling sorrow or sadness, only regret and submissive complacency at his dictated role.

 

It came as a startling surprise to suddenly feel gentle fingers wiping away his tears. His bewildered crimson eyes snapped open and stared into concerned blue orbs. Cloud was standing before him, with his hand raised to swipe a thumb across his streaked cheeks.

 

Vincent backed up immediately, only to meet the ship's shell. Remembering his place he lowered his head and had the sense to blush in embarrassment. “I'm sorry” he murmured in apology.

 

Fine eyebrows creased together in confusion as Cloud tried to reason out Vincent's odd reactions. He'd been looking for the gunman for the past half hour, and when he finally found him, he was crying silent tears. At first, he had been shocked, but as he stepped quietly closer he'd been in awe. It was strange enough to find that emotionally expressive look upon the gunman's usually impassive features. But, then to notice sweet crystal tears trailing down those soft cheeks. It had taken Cloud a moment to regain his own composure.

 

While the blond did not understand the erratic beating of his heart, he had acted instinctively and reached forth to sooth the pale beauty. Now, as Vincent was backed against the hull, his mind seemed to snap back into place. Lowering his hand, Cloud cleared his throat and averted his eyes. “We're nearly there,” he commented.

 

Not waiting for a response, he spiky haired man turned and left. He reasoned that there was little he could do to console the other, when he was in the midst of his own inner battle. The way that Vincent seemed to be affecting him was most peculiar and unexplainable.

 

While Cloud was young and not an expert with love, he wasn't naïve. He new very well what his body was reacting to. It was just confusing for him to deal with. After all, he had only just met the vampire. Aside from not even knowing the gunman, the silent companion showed little signs of being anything but impassively silent any time soon. Oh, and perhaps the biggest factor of all, Vincent was a guy. Regardless of how feminine that face might be, or how slim that body might appear, there was no doubt that Vincent was the same sex as him.

 

It wasn't long before the Highwind reached its destination. It was the fasted ship, of any sort, on the planet.

 

Vincent's first steps off the cold metal contraption were rather hesitant. Now that he was there, or at least close enough to be walking, he had doubts. Luckily, Aeris was walking right beside him, so he felt compelled to move forward.

 

Aeris wasn't sure what to expect. She knew it was odd that she asked to come along, and yet she wouldn't have rested easy doing anything else. There was a terrible pain in those sharp red eyes. She had caught sight of it when Vincent made his request to Cid to return to the mansion.

 

Walking down the steep ramp, her rubber soles gave muffled thuds. Seeing the gunman had proceeded on ahead, she jogged to catch up with him. She wasn't going for her self, but rather to support Vincent.

 

For all of Aeris good will and ability to console others, she knew when silence was best. It had always been a kind of gift she had, to sense emotions and know how to respond. Now, her senses were telling her that this distraught man needed silence. It was obvious that there was much thought going on behind those crimson eyes. However, his fragile demeanor cried out for a companion. That was why she walked beside him, not speaking, just acting as a warm presence.

 

A cool breeze swept past them, fluttering her light brown hair. Over the sound of Vincent's thick cloak moving with the gust, she thought she heard a voice calling out. Unsure, she stopped her tracks. When Vincent followed her halt, she became certain she'd heard someone.

 

Scouring the area before her, she saw naught but the outskirts of Nibelheilm. That left only one other direction.

 

As if reaching the same conclusion at the same moment, Aeris and Vincent both turned to look behind themselves and back towards the ship. The Highwind was a monstrously big and created such strong winds that it was necessary to land it a good distance from any town. Running closer from the open entrance of the ship was Cloud. He had called out for them to wait.

 

It was a wonder how the spiky haired fighter was able to carry around that enormous sword of his without falling over. It was even more perplexing how he swung it with such ease in battle.

 

Cloud quickly closed the distance between them and slowed down to walk the last few steps with a soft pant. “Cid's mooning over his precious engine, so I thought I'd join you guys,” he explained his sudden rush to catch up.

 

“Honestly, why doesn't that man go see Shera?” Aeris questioned as she turned back and they started walking together.

 

The blond seemed to think for himself a moment before answering. “You know Cid. He doesn't handle that sort of stuff so well. Besides, he's too stubborn to admit that there might be anything he should say out loud that he hasn't already.”

 

“No regrets,” Vincent's soft voice spoke, hardly above a whisper. Neither Aeris nor Cloud was sure if it was meant for them to hear, but they understood his meaning.

 

The three of them seemed in agreement to continue their trek in silence. Each was slightly apprehensive of what they might find within the deserted structure. With the end drawing near, they felt compelled to search for answers.

 

The tense manner in which Vincent held himself was what clued the other two in on the raven-haired man's nervousness. It was truly a struggle to understand what feelings might lie behind those guarded red eyes. They knew so little, and even what they had come to learn was rather sad and depressing. They could only hope there wasn't much more to this pale man's past, and that if there was that it was of a happier note.

 

Walking through the tall, rusted cast iron gates, the tall structure of the dreary mansion loomed before them. The grass was dead and brown. The long pathway towards the ornately carved stairs was overrun with weeds. Even the weeds had lost the battle of survival and crunched underfoot as they slowly made their way closer.

 

Cloud wasn't certain, but he could have sworn that when last they were here, the place didn't look nearly so abandoned. He recalled dry green grass and a few colorful flowers running along the vines that cascaded down the stone dwelling. Now however, it looked as though it had been left to rot in harsh weathers for the past century.

 

Returning from his confused inspection of the grounds, Cloud noticed an equally confused Aeris looking about with concern. Assuming she must be thinking the same thing as he was, he voiced his thoughts, “It didn't look this dead before.”

 

Biting her lip, the Ancient furrowed her thin brows, with eyes that almost seemed hurt by that mutual observation. “There is no life left here.” Her brow creased further in deep thought. Finally, she tore her eyes from the wasteland of plant life and looked directly into Cloud's luminescent eyes. “Before, I could sense something,” she paused, searching for the right words, “A faintly beating life force. It was what the flowers were drawing on. Even here, those flowers were breathing.” Her eyes suddenly shifted past the blond swordsman to rest on Vincent's cloaked form.

 

The shrouded vampire was gracefully stepping up each stair in a smooth movement that affirmed the belief that he was not a mortal being.

 

Ignoring the unspoken insinuation from Aeris, Cloud turned to follow Vincent. While he'd normally shout out for any other member to wait up, he wouldn't have done so with the gunman. Treating him the same way as he did everyone else didn't feel right. Especially, when he didn't seem to feel the same way about the alluring man as he did everyone else.

 

Once again catching up, Cloud settled in stride with the gliding steps of his companion. He watched in fascination as Vincent's eyes swept around the large open room they had entered. The man's pale face was raised from its usual burrowing beneath that high collar. Bright light shown in through a tall window at the top of the open staircase, making those delicate features all the more visible. Bowed lips were slightly parted and glistened after a pink tongue darted out to moisten them.

 

As much as the gunman seemed entranced with the room around him, Cloud was captivated by the longhaired beauty's exposed face. He suddenly found his hand itching to reach up and caress a pale cheek. From earlier, he recalled how smooth and soft and surprisingly warm it had felt. Now, he felt a longing to touch even more.

 

The cracking sound of glass beneath Aeris' boot snapped him from his daydreams. Aeris had taken her time to join them, and he'd completely forgotten she was here. Running a hand through his blond hair, he cursed and reprimanded himself. At twenty-one years of age, he was not some hormonal teenager. Such thoughts about the silent addition to their team were not acceptable.

 

“I'm going to Hojo's lab.” The soft words echoed in the bare room. It was a subtle hint that he would like to be left alone.

 

Aeris and Cloud picked up on it and remained in place as the mysterious being walked off. They noted how the elegant steps faltered before the staircase slightly, halting as if coming across some barrier. It was only for a moment however, before he kept on walking and disappeared.

 

Although Aeris was not one to gossip or talk behind the backs of others, she couldn't help but ask, “What do you think really went on here thirty years ago?”

 

Mako enhanced eyes tore away from the spot they'd last glimpsed that tattered red cloak and fell to the concerned Ancient. Crossing his arms, he regarded her with a thoughtful expression. “I can't even begin to guess. Some people are just quiet, it's just their way.” It was hard to tell whether Vincent's cold and closed demeanor was just the way he was or a result of past events.

 

“No one has that much sadness in their eyes if something bad didn't happen,” Aeris countered, firm in her belief that Vincent was warped to become the lonesome warrior he was today.

 

“We don't know that,” Cloud responded, not liking the idea that anything bad could happen to such an angelic looking person. It was like saying horrible things were done to an innocent child like Marlene.

 

“Cloud,” Aeris soothed, seeming to sense some underlying emotion in their leader, “Is something the matter?” she asked gently.

 

Sighing, the swordsman glanced down into the flower girl's kind green eyes. There was nothing he couldn't trust her with. She would never ridicule him or break their tacit confidence. “I just can't stand the idea that someone,” he searched for the right words, “that anything bad could have happened to him.”

 

Sensing a hidden emotion in the spiky haired boy, Aeris walked forward and sat down on the bottom steps of the main staircase. Motioning for Cloud to sit beside her, she waited until he was in place before speaking. “You care for him, don't you?”

 

“We just met him,” Cloud defended, neither denying nor admitting anything.

 

“Sometimes it isn't a matter of how long you've known someone,” she began, but upon seeing the uncomprehending look on his face she tried again. “You've know Tifa for a long time now, right?” she inquired, hoping to impress an important point that she'd learned long ago.

 

“Since we were little kids,” he said, shifting his feet to a lower step and taking on more comfortable position.

 

“And yet, can you say that you care for her more than you do for me?” she questioned.

 

It was a moment before he responded. “Not exactly. But that's different.”

 

“How?” Each word she spoke was patient and understanding. She truly did not seem merely a year older than him.

 

“It just is,” he replied at a loss for a proper reason.

 

Intuitive as ever, she guessed what his mind was dwelling on. “You believe that you care for me just as much as Tifa, even though you've known her longer, because you're in love.”

 

Cloud's eyes widened as he stared at her. A slight blush graced his cheeks. His lack of denial was as good as an agreement.

 

“But, you're not in love with me,” Aeris spoke smoothly, looking forward into the darkened room. The light from the window behind them did not reach the far corners.

 

“Aeris,” Cloud began, unsure of what to say. He wasn't even sure of it himself, whether or not it was true.

 

“No, I know the truth. You're love for me is for the place I can fill in your heart,” she answered with a small nod, as if finally reaching the answer for herself as well.

 

“Place?” the blond asked, rather curious of the insight this woman seemed to hold.

 

“Do you remember your mother, Cloud?”

 

The absolute quiet that followed was all the answer either of them needed. While Aeris had secretly found a warm happiness in the thought that their handsome leader had fallen in love with her, she felt no sadness at this sudden realization. In fact, it was warming to know that she might play such an important role in anyone's life.

 

Returning to the point she had been trying to make before, she continued, “So you see, the love we feel for each other is not measured by the hours we spend together. Though, it does generally bring us closer together, that's not always the way things work.”

 

Remaining silent for a few more moments, Cloud also stared forth at nothing in the center of the room. Finally, as all of Aeris words set in, he rounded on her defensively, “I'm not in love with Vincent!” he half shouted.

 

Green eyes rose in questioning surprise, “I never said you were.” She couldn't help but giggle at the horror stricken look that crossed the spiky haired leader's face. Afraid that her amusement might set him back in his quest to sort out his feelings, she reassured, “But, it wouldn't be a bad thing if you were.”

 

“What!” He did shout this time.

 

Oh, how young and naïve their leader could be at times. “I'm just saying, it wouldn't be a bad thing,” she reiterated.

 

“B-but, he's a guy,” he pointed out the obvious.

 

Smirking to herself, she gave him her best mischievous look, “A very pretty one at that.”

 

Their conversation was abruptly halted as a loud crashing noise sounded from far away. They were both to their feet and rushing in the direction Vincent had headed. Within their own musings they had forgotten how vulnerable a place this might be for the very man they were discussing.

 

Cloud took the lead, practically leaping down the mossy and slippery stairs that lead to the dungeon like basement. Aeris was forced to fall behind, unable to keep as sure a footing in the darkness as her trained friend.

 

“Vincent!” Cloud's worried voice called out, echoing off the walls. It was as damp and musky down there as ever. He was almost certain the noise had come from this area. It made sense after all. This was where all of Hojo's documents would be, and where they had initially found Vincent.

 

“Vincent!” he called out louder. His heart was in his throat and he was doing his best not to panic. Usually he was able to keep his calm in such situations. Not now though. Not after Aeris had filled his head with half-baked ideas and assurances. Though he was far from succumbing to any feelings he might harbor for the raven-haired beauty, he didn't want the gunman to be gone before he could sort everything out.

 

He forced open each door along the corridor, scouring each darkened room quickly before rushing to the next. Faintly he heard Aeris' muffle cry behind him. She had probably looked in the first of many blood-spattered rooms full of contraptions he didn't want to remember in his dreams. Rounding the next corner he headed for he next door, but before he could twist the handle and throw it open, his eyes caught a faint light at the end of the narrow passage.

 

His feet sprinted across the cold stone floor, racing to the partially opened door. Before he reached the doorway, he heard splashing sounds. Looking down, he saw there was a pool of watery liquid covering the ground. The source of the liquid was from within the room.

 

Throwing the heavy wooden door the rest of the way, Cloud halted his footsteps suddenly. At the far end of the room was a large broken glass container, shaped like a cylinder. A body lay on the ground before the shattered container, with blue liquid pooling about its form, draining from the holding unit. The body was that of a woman, wearing a long white dress. Her head lay face first on the stone floor, with white hair sopping to the side. Her whole body appeared to have been bleached out.

 

Tearing his eyes from the motionless form of the dead body on the ground, Cloud shifted his gaze to the corner. Between a bookshelf and the broken container, Vincent was crouched back, as if trying to melt into the wall itself. Huddled beneath the folds of his read cloak. Cloud gulped and silently willed the gunman to make some movement.

 

With his eyes trained intently on the person he'd rushed down there so desperately to find, the blond noticed the cloaked form was shaking. Now, as his senses returned, he perceived muffled sobs.

 

Something snapped within Cloud, as he realized Vincent was crying again. Rushing forth, Cloud stooped and enveloped the solemn companion in his arms. The sobs stopped for a moment. Vincent seemed surprised and frightened. Afraid that the pale man would back away like before, Cloud tightened his hold and reached a hand up to gently stroke silken hair.

 

Gulping, Cloud did his best to ignore how his chest restricted when Vincent gave in. The introverted man gave way to expressing his pain, and continued to sob into the blond's chest, while clutching the soft fabric tightly of his battle worn vest.

 

Aeris arrived shortly after, fighting down her own emotions at what she found. She didn't need to view to cold and lifeless body in the middle of the floor twice to know who it was. Vincent had found Lucrecia, apparently preserved in some twisted manner by Hojo.

 

Realizing what such a discovery must have done to Vincent, she signaled to Cloud that they should leave right away.

 

TBC….