Other Fan Fiction ❯ A Few Fries Short of a Happy Meal ❯ The Application From Hell ( Chapter 3 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: paarthea 
poor school councilor, Bill hands in his college application
Miscellaneous: Other Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Shounen | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 04.01.2009 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.5K | Visits: 294 | Status: Work In Progress
poor school councilor, Bill hands in his college application
Miscellaneous: Other Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Shounen | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 04.01.2009 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.5K | Visits: 294 | Status: Work In Progress
Author's Chapter Notes:
Billa: Anony is awesome-pawsome. she wrote this one just for you
Anony: but mein CAPSLOCK is osmer, she's the only one who could so wonderfully write about jellyfish testicles
Billa: *huge grin* yes yumi jelly testicles...they're a delicacy in....egypt? (jk jk) but i hope you guys enjoy, anony worked really hard, and i nagged her a lot
Anony: yea, she did -le sigh- but, it's all worth it. it's from a different POV than ya'll are used to so far...a high school counselor DUN-DUN-DUN!
Being a counselor is boring. It’s a sucky job. It’s worse when you’re a high school counselor. All I ever got to hear about was broken nails and not having a date for the prom. Yes, as you see, I hated my job. I despised it. It was the bane of my existence. Out of all the students I’ve ever had to deal with, there are four I’m sure I’ll never forget. Let me tell you a bit about them, shall I?
First we have Tom Kaulitz. He was one of the guys that all the girls wanted, but couldn’t have. Why? Well, first of all, he was gayer than gay. He was so gay it was hilarious. He tried to come across as this total player, but he was gay. Plus, he was an idiot. He was so stupid. Honestly, he was ridiculously stupid. There was only one person in the school who could fully understand him, and that was his twin brother Bill.
Now, Bill was another one that all the girls wanted. But, they couldn’t have him either. Why? Because though (apparently) he had a big sex drive, he only had eyes for one stupid person. This boy is the vainest person I’ve ever met. Honestly, if he could see his reflection on a surface, he’d look at it. His hair and clothes always had to be perfect.
Georg was an odd one in deed. He wasn’t as much of a perfectionist when it came to his looks as Bill was, but he always had to look nice. However, this wasn’t his downfall. He couldn’t speak proper English…at all. We tried. We strapped the poor kid to a chair, but all that came out was that damn internet speak. It was practically unbearable.
Then, there was Gustav…now he, he was the normal one. Or he seemed normal. But, he had a habit of skipping school on really sunny days or wearing a lot of clothes and hats. He never ate, yet he wasn’t dying of anorexia. He had a very…morbid sense of humor and I swear he could hear things that he shouldn’t have been able to.
The twins together were something…odd. I swear that they’d flirt whenever they were together. That’s right flirt with each other. And they’re brothers…twins. I swear I’d see it. Nobody else in the school would say a thing about it though. I think they were scared of Bill. He could be pretty scary when he was pissed off. Oh, yeah, one time, I swear I saw Tom grab Bill’s ass in the hallway at their lockers. But , it was probably my imagination…or that’s what I thought. Until the day Bill Kaulitz came into my office to work on college applications, as it turns out he’s a very open person…
He came in, dressed to impress as per usual. Not a hair was out of place on his head and the eyeliner he wore was perfect. He seemed a bit flushed and smirked a bit at his reflection in the mirror on my wall before running a finger along the edge of his bottom lip. Then he readjusted his jacket and smiled, winking slightly at his reflection before he sat down daintily on the chair in front of my desk as to not wrinkle his clothes. He smiled at me as he pulled out his college application from the bag I hadn’t even realized he was carrying since he rarely parted with it at the school, as if he were afraid someone would find something in it they shouldn’t. I looked at the application and raised an eyebrow before saying, “Are you sure you want to go here?”
He smirked at me and said, “Lady, Tom may be my brother, but my IQ is way higher than his. I think I can handle it.”
I sighed and said, “Yes, but you do realize Tom can’t get in here.” I was a bit frightened by the smile he flashed my way. I cleared my throat a bit and said, “Anyway, what extra-curriculars do you have?”
“Well, I’m in choir and drama.”
“Is that all?”
He bit his lower lip as he smiled a bit before saying, “Honestly? It’s the only one appropriate. I mean, I don’t think they’d like to know what I spend the most of my time doing.”
“And, what’s that?”
“My brother,” he replied with a shrug as he dug through his bag and pulled out a bottle of nail polish. I just sat there staring for a few seconds as he started touching up his nails (as I said, perfectionist). He raised his pierced eyebrow. “Uhm…what’s next?”
I blinked a few times, clearing my throat and shaking my head. I misheard him…that’s all… I shifted in my seat and looked at the application. “Uhm…your grades?”
“All A’s every year. How do you think Tomi gets any sort of decent mark? I have to help him. ‘Course, didn’t do him much good. He’s still in summer school.”
“It’s…October, Bill…”
Bill put the lid back on his nail polish as he said, “I know. He’s coming back again after graduation.”
“And how do you know this?”
“Please,” he said as he rolled his eyes and pulled a small mirror out of his bag. He started messing with his hair as he said, “We’ve been in every sort of sex position imaginable since we hit puberty. I think I’d know by now whether or not he’d actually pass.”
I’d just put a Tic Tac in my mouth when I heard ‘sex position’ and I started to choke. The teen just smirked at me and checked his appearance in the mirror one more time before putting it up. He said it just to freak me out, that’s it. That’s what it was. “Uh…we…uh, next it…uhm, other languages! What other languages do you speak?”
“Well, I’m fluent in idiot,” he answered as he pulled out his cell phone. “After all, someone has to be. Otherwise, Tomi wouldn’t make sense to anyone. Tom don’t touch that!” He shouted the last part toward the door.
I raised my eyebrow just before I heard someone outside say, “Uh-oh.” Then there was a crash as one of my vases in the hall just outside my office fell to the ground. Then the door opened and Tom came in looking sheepish. “Uhm, oops.” He smiled a bit before saying, “Biiiiiiiiiiiiiill, if you hadn’t yelled at me I wouldn’t have jumped-ed. Don’t be using our teleapathetic powerzes against me like that.”
Bill looked at me with a raised eyebrow before saying, “See what I mean?”
“I’m a blessing in the skies!”
Bill rolled his eyes and said, “Shut up, Tomi,” as he crossed his arms.
Immediately, the older brother got tears in his eyes and started pouting. “You don’t love me, do you?” Bill just sighed softly and the other boy crossed his arms before saying, “You just take me for granite!”
“I swear on the grave of our mother…”
“Our mother snot dead.”
Bill sighed and said, “She will be one day…” He irritatedly brushed his hair back a bit. “On our mother’s grave, I’ve never taken you for a rock, in all of my life. Although, you are about as dense as one.”
“Don’t be silly, Bill. Rocks don’t dance.”
Bill just groaned and slapped his brother upside the head. “Uhm, maybe we should finish this application some other time,” I said.
He smiled charmingly at me as he picked it up and put it in his bag. “See you later, Mrs. F!” he said brightly as he picked up his bag and started pushing Tom out the door. And just before the door shut, Bill put his hand on Tom’s ass…
Chapter End Notes:
Reviws = cookies for me und you!
Billa: Anony is awesome-pawsome. she wrote this one just for you
Anony: but mein CAPSLOCK is osmer, she's the only one who could so wonderfully write about jellyfish testicles
Billa: *huge grin* yes yumi jelly testicles...they're a delicacy in....egypt? (jk jk) but i hope you guys enjoy, anony worked really hard, and i nagged her a lot
Anony: yea, she did -le sigh- but, it's all worth it. it's from a different POV than ya'll are used to so far...a high school counselor DUN-DUN-DUN!
Being a counselor is boring. It’s a sucky job. It’s worse when you’re a high school counselor. All I ever got to hear about was broken nails and not having a date for the prom. Yes, as you see, I hated my job. I despised it. It was the bane of my existence. Out of all the students I’ve ever had to deal with, there are four I’m sure I’ll never forget. Let me tell you a bit about them, shall I?
First we have Tom Kaulitz. He was one of the guys that all the girls wanted, but couldn’t have. Why? Well, first of all, he was gayer than gay. He was so gay it was hilarious. He tried to come across as this total player, but he was gay. Plus, he was an idiot. He was so stupid. Honestly, he was ridiculously stupid. There was only one person in the school who could fully understand him, and that was his twin brother Bill.
Now, Bill was another one that all the girls wanted. But, they couldn’t have him either. Why? Because though (apparently) he had a big sex drive, he only had eyes for one stupid person. This boy is the vainest person I’ve ever met. Honestly, if he could see his reflection on a surface, he’d look at it. His hair and clothes always had to be perfect.
Georg was an odd one in deed. He wasn’t as much of a perfectionist when it came to his looks as Bill was, but he always had to look nice. However, this wasn’t his downfall. He couldn’t speak proper English…at all. We tried. We strapped the poor kid to a chair, but all that came out was that damn internet speak. It was practically unbearable.
Then, there was Gustav…now he, he was the normal one. Or he seemed normal. But, he had a habit of skipping school on really sunny days or wearing a lot of clothes and hats. He never ate, yet he wasn’t dying of anorexia. He had a very…morbid sense of humor and I swear he could hear things that he shouldn’t have been able to.
The twins together were something…odd. I swear that they’d flirt whenever they were together. That’s right flirt with each other. And they’re brothers…twins. I swear I’d see it. Nobody else in the school would say a thing about it though. I think they were scared of Bill. He could be pretty scary when he was pissed off. Oh, yeah, one time, I swear I saw Tom grab Bill’s ass in the hallway at their lockers. But , it was probably my imagination…or that’s what I thought. Until the day Bill Kaulitz came into my office to work on college applications, as it turns out he’s a very open person…
He came in, dressed to impress as per usual. Not a hair was out of place on his head and the eyeliner he wore was perfect. He seemed a bit flushed and smirked a bit at his reflection in the mirror on my wall before running a finger along the edge of his bottom lip. Then he readjusted his jacket and smiled, winking slightly at his reflection before he sat down daintily on the chair in front of my desk as to not wrinkle his clothes. He smiled at me as he pulled out his college application from the bag I hadn’t even realized he was carrying since he rarely parted with it at the school, as if he were afraid someone would find something in it they shouldn’t. I looked at the application and raised an eyebrow before saying, “Are you sure you want to go here?”
He smirked at me and said, “Lady, Tom may be my brother, but my IQ is way higher than his. I think I can handle it.”
I sighed and said, “Yes, but you do realize Tom can’t get in here.” I was a bit frightened by the smile he flashed my way. I cleared my throat a bit and said, “Anyway, what extra-curriculars do you have?”
“Well, I’m in choir and drama.”
“Is that all?”
He bit his lower lip as he smiled a bit before saying, “Honestly? It’s the only one appropriate. I mean, I don’t think they’d like to know what I spend the most of my time doing.”
“And, what’s that?”
“My brother,” he replied with a shrug as he dug through his bag and pulled out a bottle of nail polish. I just sat there staring for a few seconds as he started touching up his nails (as I said, perfectionist). He raised his pierced eyebrow. “Uhm…what’s next?”
I blinked a few times, clearing my throat and shaking my head. I misheard him…that’s all… I shifted in my seat and looked at the application. “Uhm…your grades?”
“All A’s every year. How do you think Tomi gets any sort of decent mark? I have to help him. ‘Course, didn’t do him much good. He’s still in summer school.”
“It’s…October, Bill…”
Bill put the lid back on his nail polish as he said, “I know. He’s coming back again after graduation.”
“And how do you know this?”
“Please,” he said as he rolled his eyes and pulled a small mirror out of his bag. He started messing with his hair as he said, “We’ve been in every sort of sex position imaginable since we hit puberty. I think I’d know by now whether or not he’d actually pass.”
I’d just put a Tic Tac in my mouth when I heard ‘sex position’ and I started to choke. The teen just smirked at me and checked his appearance in the mirror one more time before putting it up. He said it just to freak me out, that’s it. That’s what it was. “Uh…we…uh, next it…uhm, other languages! What other languages do you speak?”
“Well, I’m fluent in idiot,” he answered as he pulled out his cell phone. “After all, someone has to be. Otherwise, Tomi wouldn’t make sense to anyone. Tom don’t touch that!” He shouted the last part toward the door.
I raised my eyebrow just before I heard someone outside say, “Uh-oh.” Then there was a crash as one of my vases in the hall just outside my office fell to the ground. Then the door opened and Tom came in looking sheepish. “Uhm, oops.” He smiled a bit before saying, “Biiiiiiiiiiiiiill, if you hadn’t yelled at me I wouldn’t have jumped-ed. Don’t be using our teleapathetic powerzes against me like that.”
Bill looked at me with a raised eyebrow before saying, “See what I mean?”
“I’m a blessing in the skies!”
Bill rolled his eyes and said, “Shut up, Tomi,” as he crossed his arms.
Immediately, the older brother got tears in his eyes and started pouting. “You don’t love me, do you?” Bill just sighed softly and the other boy crossed his arms before saying, “You just take me for granite!”
“I swear on the grave of our mother…”
“Our mother snot dead.”
Bill sighed and said, “She will be one day…” He irritatedly brushed his hair back a bit. “On our mother’s grave, I’ve never taken you for a rock, in all of my life. Although, you are about as dense as one.”
“Don’t be silly, Bill. Rocks don’t dance.”
Bill just groaned and slapped his brother upside the head. “Uhm, maybe we should finish this application some other time,” I said.
He smiled charmingly at me as he picked it up and put it in his bag. “See you later, Mrs. F!” he said brightly as he picked up his bag and started pushing Tom out the door. And just before the door shut, Bill put his hand on Tom’s ass…
Chapter End Notes:
Reviws = cookies for me und you!