Project A-Ko Fan Fiction / Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction / Vampire Hunter (Darkstalkers) Fan Fiction ❯ Nabiki 1/2 (A Very Scary Thought) ❯ When Monsters Collide... ( Chapter 82 )

Nabiki 1/2

(A Very Scary Thought)

Written by Jim Robert Bader

Proofread by Shiva Barnwell

Based Upon the Altered Destinies Storyline

Inspired by the works of such fans as

Wade Tritshler

Richard Lawson

James Jones

And Many Others

Standard Disclaimer: This is inspired by the work of Takahashi Rumiko and is not my original creation. All characters belong to her. This is only a fanfictional work, and is not intended to compromise the rights of the original owners, distributors and publishers of the Ranma series. I have no money to spare and would very much appreciate if no one tries to sue me.

"I still don't get it," said Agent Jei to his partner, "If this guy calling himself Frank Stein is who he says he is…"

"Makes him over one hundred and ninety years old," replied Agent Kei as the two of them stood perched atop a low hill that offered them an excellent vantage point for overseeing the reservoir area in total, "Don't have to buy him a birthday cake, he hates being reminded of his age, thinks it looks bad for his virility or something."

"Anyway," Jei resumed dubiously, "He can't be the same guy…I mean, didn't he die or something at the end of the novel?"

"Don't believe everything you read, slick," Kei cautioned his partner, "He'll be the first one to come down on you, then he'll explain how he feels that he's been grossly slandered in the media, and there's plenty of justification for his claims. Fact is, he lost control over his own identity to the public sector years ago, so he's never had much control over how Hollywood chooses to portray him. He's mainly just tried to ignore the numerous factual errors contained in the numerous accounts about his life and tries to take it all in stride with as much graveyard humor as he can muster. He figures amassing a considerable fortune off the patents on his inventions is revenge enough. Meanwhile, he's living the good life behaving like a wild man on one side and a well educated scholarly gentleman on the other."

"What about this group he's involved with?" Jei asked.

"Delphi?" Kei sniffed, "MIB doesn't have much involvement with them. They're an elite group of industrialists and Paranormal types loosely allied on the principle of advancing the general welfare of humanity through information exchange and the promotion of Renaissance ideals. Mostly their concerns are with this world, not Aliens per-se, except for a few unusual cases where we share a mutual interest. We mostly stay out of each others way as much as possible and let them fight it out with their Cabalistic rivals at MAZE…"

"MAZE?" Jei looked increasingly puzzled.

"Machiavellian Adherent Zooist Enclave," Kei explained, "Just a loose designation for another elite conspiracy, only this one's dedicated to the control and domination of Humanity through the media and government. Basically, they're the power behind the throne for a great many of the world's surviving Tyrannies and subversive organizations. They don't really call themselves MAZE or carry ID cards or even have stationary with that name on the logo, but the various outlets that comprise that group are united in the belief that human beings are basically incapable of governing their own lives and need the authority of a governing body of enlightened despots to insure people behave themselves. They just basically make themselves a nuisance, but we don't actively stand in each other's way unless we have a conflict of interests."

"All these secret conspiracies," Jei shook his head, "It's a lot for a simple street cop like me to take in stride…"

"You and everybody else on the planet can sleep tight and not worry about these things," Kei replied matter of factly, "Conspiracies are as old as the human race, and probably a lot older than our current sub-species since there's talk among some circles than humanity itself is descended from some extinct alien civilization calling itself the Solnoids…"

"Oh man!" Jei winced, "I thought you were pulling my leg when you said most Japanese are descended from aliens!"

"Not everybody," Kei shrugged, "But you may already know that the Japanese language is unique among the various languages of Asia. There is no other quite like it, not even Korean, and they come the closest at having 20% of the same words in common with us. The reason is because Japan was briefly colonized in the year 406 BC by the Juraians, which is why our Emperor here claims Juraian blood through his own sacred ancestor, the first Emperor Jimmu…"

"Oh, now the Emperor's an alien?" Jei replied, "This just gets better and better! How come the whole planet isn't speaking Japanese, then?"

"The colony didn't last," Kei replied, "Earth's too far out of line with normal Juraian shipping lanes, way too far down the Galactic arm for most of the civilized races in point of fact. Japan was left to get by on its own, but the imprint of Juraian culture is felt down to our own time, which makes us unique from other members of the human race, including our American counterparts."

"And what about my people?" Jei asked, "My ancestors were Ainu…"

"The original inhabitants of Japan before the Jurai settled here," Kei casually noted, "The majority population of Japan has mixed Mainland and Juraian ancestry, about eighty generations removed. The Ainu have mostly been assimilated into the basic culture but old prejudices remain in spite of the current state of enlightenment in the world. Doesn't make any difference as far as our mission goes, however, you're still MIB, which means you belong with the true defenders of humanity, and nothing is more important than looking out for the welfare of this planet."

"So what are we doing here chasing giant lizards?" Jei sheltered his eyes as he saw the big one eating through a pile of fish that could have fed a small third world nation.

"Like I told Frank," Kei replied, "We've got clients to protect, both here and other surrounding provinces. Can't have these bad boys tearing up the landscape and possibly compromising a number of relocation cases."

"How many alien cases are we talking about here?" Jei wondered.

"A lot," Kei replied without being too specific, "Uh oh…don't look now but it looks like the Big G has spotted the new kid on the block. Should get interesting from this point onward…"

"You have got to be kidding me," Hercules commented as he looked from one gigantic beast to the other.

"Now that's big," Thor-chan remarked, staring up at the looming hulk that dominated the nearby low mountains.

"Two of them?" Aiko winced, "One was bad enough, but this…"

"I wonder," Beatrice mused thoughtfully, "Doctor Steinberg, correct me if I'm wrong, but has this other fellow come a long way as if drawn by a certain calling?"

"You might say that," Frank replied, "About seven hours ago he broke out of a special containment facility and has been heading this way on an unbroken line, and now I think I'm starting to see the reason."

"As do I," Beatrice mused, "This other one only hatched around six or more hours ago…it's almost as if he sensed this before it actually happened."

"You mean that bruiser came all this way just to challenge my baby?" Ukyo said with an angry glare towards the aptly described King of all Monsters.

"Ucchan?" Ranma looked worried at his iinazuke's tone, as did Perfume beside him.

"Lizards are about as territorial as creatures get," Frank remarked, "But in this case I don't think it's quite…"

"Boss," the motorcycle spoke up, "Got an incoming message on you from a secured channel. You want to take it?"

"Go ahead," Frank put one hand to his ear and paused a moment before saying, "Interesting…somebody's trying to fly a fleet of five helicopters through the containment zone…"

"Those are with us," Nabiki promptly spoke up, "If they have the Kuno Family Company logo they are flying in some needed supplies…"

Frank swiveled his focus towards her again, "Interesting. I don't suppose you might care to share with me what's in those 'choppers?"

"Just some elements that I requested, Sir," Beatrice explained, then ran off a list of chemical agents that caused the big man to arch an eyebrow.

"I get it now," Frank smiled, "That's pretty clever. Mixed in just the right way those will brew up a mighty potent sleeping pill, keyed specifically to a reptilian anatomy. I'll authorize it. Clear them through, Darlin'! Those choppers get priority authorization."

"Are you in charge of something, Frank?" Ryoga asked in surprise.

"Sure am," Frank replied, "Monster containment is my specialty. By the way, who's the little lady clinging to your arm?"

"Oh," Ryoga began to blush, "This is my iinazuke, Tendo Akane. Akane-chan, this is my friend, Frank. He kind of helped me out a while ago during one of my travels…"

"During my last trip to the Old Country," Frank remarked as he gave Akane a very thorough study, "Iinazuke, huh? Not bad, kid, you do have standards."

"Charmed," Akane said, glancing back towards the approaching four hundred foot monster and said, "But maybe introductions should wait until after we get out of his way?"

"Good point," Nabiki had already drawn her own conclusions and said, "I think we'd better move this to one side, people. In case nobody else has noticed this, we're right in the way between both interested parties."

"Good point," Frank said, moving back to remount his motorcycle, "I suggest a lateral course of retreat, preferably one where we all stay downwind of that critter. Once he picks up the other one's scent the safest place to be will be as far away as we can take this."

"Over there," Nabiki waved towards where the makeshift kitchen manned by the rest of their family was waiting, "You, too, Ucchan. You're not getting into the middle of this one if I have anything to say about it."

"But he wants to hurt my baby!" Ukyo protested.

"Ucchan…" Nabiki started to drawl, then just looked to Ranma and Perfume, who nodded and took a firm grip of their beloved's arms, guiding her away even as they became aware that the newly arrived Big G was halting in mid step and sniffing the air significantly.

The huge Tyrannosaur-like monster was snuffling like a bloodhound before he gave a cry that shattered windows for kilometers in all directions. It was answered at once as "Baby" turned around to confront him, head extended in a way that conveyed a curious form of challenge, which was answered in kind by the larger reptile stomping both legs and making thrashing motions with his arms as though to make himself look even more impressive.

"It's like a Sumo challenge," Ranma observed, looking from one monster to the other before saying, "That guy must outweigh 'Baby' by at least several thousand metric tons!"

"Try eight thousand, two hundred and thirty-seven," Beatrice replied matter-of-factly, giving him a smirk as she added, "A remarkably accurate estimation. You must be a lot smarter than appearances would suggest."

Both Aiko and Nabiki frowned slightly at that comment while Ranma appeared uncomfortable in trying to interpret the silver-haired girl's meaning. Unfortunately, they both became aware that the thunder of the approaching lizard was coming a lot closer towards them than anyone had expected.

"Alison," Beatrice suddenly turned around, "We need for you to delay him long enough for the rest of us to get clear. Remove your bracers now."

"What?" Aiko halted in her tracks and looked stunned towards Beatrice, "Are you nuts? If I do that…"

"Just do it, and trust me!" Beatrice replied, "I know you can do it, Alison…no one has more confidence in you than I have, so…please remove your bracers."

"All right," Aiko growled, reaching to her left arm bracer and beginning to twist it in a way that produced an odd clicking sound, "Just…stop calling me Alison already…"

"What's she going to do?" Ranma asked, "Give that thing a Judo throw?"

"Close enough," Beatrice replied with an oddly wistful expression, hurrying to keep up with the others.

The huge dinosaur-like creature was almost upon them as Aiko turned to face the beast, strangely not as worried as someone would think an average looking girl should be when confronted by a monster the size of a large skyscraper. Out of the corner of her eye, however, she caught sight of two others and said, "What are you guys doing…?"

"You think I'm gonna let you face that all by yourself?" Hercules replied.

"Yeah," Thor-chan snorted, "This is usually our gig. You want us to lose our license or something?"

"I appreciate the thought, Gramps, really, but I don't need any help…" Aiko suddenly stopped talking as a looming shadow appeared over her head. Her brown eyes got round as she looked up to see the massive foot coming down towards her, not aimed at her specifically but more the result of a careless step as the creature seemed totally focused towards the other humungous lizard. Aiko raised her arms just in time as the foot came crashing down where she was standing and smashed an area the size of a large house. Hercules and Thor-chan looked stunned, then turned very nervous looks towards the other foot, which even then was coming down in their direction.

"Aiko!" Akane cried as she tossed a look back over her shoulder.

Frank, who had been pacing them so far, suddenly halted his bike and whirled around, "Did you say…A-Ko?"

"Yeah," Ryoga looked at the huge man on the massive bike, "Do you know her?"

Frank raised his goggles and said, "I sure might if she's who I think she is. Hooboy! Big G is in real trouble…"

"Huh?" Ranma asked skeptically when everyone turned to see the most amazing sight that followed in the next instant.

The second food had been only meters away from the two gods, who were preparing to deflect it with their combined strengths, only the monster made a very odd sound and started to shift its balance when it abruptly shook and swayed on one leg. To everyone's collective amazement the foot making contact with the ground began to lift two full meters as a very angry Aiko appeared, supporting the entire weight of the creature on both hands as she snarled in anger.

"That really pisses me off!" she cried, "Don't take me for granted, you big bully!"

And with that she hurled the creature up into the air, causing him to soar half his own height as he tumbled onto one side and landed with a solid crunch that caused the area to shake like a massive earth tremor.

"Yep," Frank murmured drolly, "That's definitely her all right."

"You recognize Alison?" Beatrice asked as she turned an amused look at her erstwhile companion, whose school uniform was slightly disheveled.

"Sure do," Frank replied, "Alison Kent Managi, Project AKO-10947…which means you're Beatrice Kane Daitokuji, Project BKO-20906, am I right?"

"You must have been with the institute, then," Beatrice observed drolly as the others finished clearing out of the reservoir area and gathered about where the makeshift kitchen was assembled.

"I was a consultant reviewing your cases," Frank replied, "There were a number of other special subjects being tested to determine the nature of their Paranormal abilities, including a very odd young girl with alien DNA that the two of you got into some sort of fight over…"

"Celeste Kotobuki," Beatrice nodded, "Project CKO-032851, although we liked to refer to her as Ceiko."

"Excuse me for not being as caught up with nostalgia as the two of you," Nabiki said, nodding back to Aiko, "But how exactly was she able to do that?"

Frank started forward again as he called out over his shoulder, "Long story! Wait until we're completely clear of the danger zone."

"The simple answer is in the bracers," Beatrice informed her puzzled friend, "They have a special function, which is why I told Alison to remove them."

"What, does that amplify her power or something?" Nabiki said in confusion.

"Not exactly," Beatrice replied, "The bracers do not amplify anything, they diminish her power levels and contain them to manageable levels. Without their dampening effects, Alison's already formidable strength is vastly superior to her ability to control it. As wave of her hand could literally change the course of mighty rivers, which is why I hope she slips them back on before she gets here."

Aiko was indeed on her way to join them while the massive creature she had toppled was only just then recovering from the combination of surprise and shock at being so woman-handled. It had not even seen the tiny insect that had done this to the mighty King of the Monsters, but even as he got back to his feet another cry drew his attention and he oriented back towards his original objective.

Both Thor-chan and Hercules were standing there with their mouths hanging open as Aiko strode past them without glancing either way, just commenting in passing, "You guys'll attract flies that way, you know. This way, Old-timers."

The two powerhouse gods exchanged looks at that "Old-Timers" comment and then Thor-chan remarked, "She's one of yours, no doubt about it."

"Yeah," Hercules replied, "She's a real chip off the old marble block…so why does that worry me so much…?"

Frank took a position atop the rise with the others and was about to kill the engine to his cycle when he caught sight of one of the party gathered around the makeshift kitchen and did a double take. He stared in disbelief for several long seconds, then softly murmured under his voice, "Shelly…see that guy over there? Do an ID check on him, will you?"

"Not a problem, Boss," his autocomputer replied, "What's the scoop, who is he?"

"That's what I want to know," Frank growled menacingly, "Can't be the same guy I'm thinking about or he'd be older than me, and that's flat-out crazy."

"Will Baby be all right?" asked Kasumi to the anxious Ukyo, "That other fellow seems so…aggressive."

"That's Gojira," Soun said in a voice that trembled with scarcely contained disbelief, "I thought we'd seen the last of him twenty years ago, Saotome."

"So did I, Tendo," Genma remarked with a slightly distracted expression, "But why is that big fellow over there giving me such an unfriendly glare? I'm sure our paths have never crossed…"

"You just have that effect on some people, dear," Nodoka remarked pleasantly, "Not everyone reacts well to someone on their first meeting…"

"Very true," Hinako agreed, watching the spectacle of the two Lizards offering challenge across the declared field of impending combat, munching on some candy that Shampoo had thoughtfully provided, "Those two look like they're going to have it out, but why are they making so much noise?"

"What was that?" Perfume asked, covering her own ears to cut down the decibel level.

"Sound very funny," Shampoo frowned, "No like sound make when two animals very angry at one another."

"Probably trying to settle something out between themselves in advance, Sham-chan," Nabiki said as she and the rest of their group were finally able to join them, "A lot of posturing and preening going on out there, like the two of them are communicating on a level not understood by anyone else…"

"Yes," Beatrice replied, "I was rather thinking much the same thing myself. In fact it sounds almost as if they are ready to get down to business."

"Is it a good idea to let those two fight?" Aiko asked as she and the two gods following her strode up together, "They could flatten half of Nerima if this gets really nasty."

"I don't think it will go that far, Alison," Beatrice remarked as she studied the two prospective combatants, who were even then circling as if seeking to probe the defenses of one another, "By the way, that was a very good show you put on out there. I knew you had it in you."

"Yeah, well," Aiko flexed her arms and studied her black bracers, "Taking these off was a risk…I mean, remember what happened that one time in the restaurant?"

"How could I forget?" Beatrice with a fond smile, "Captain Napapolalita never quite forgave us for all that destruction."

"You mean Captain Sloshed a lot?" Aiko had to grin at the memory, "Yeah, we were kind of out of control there. Never thought I'd look back on that whole mess with nostalgia."

"Yes," Beatrice said with a sad little smile, "We have had some good times together."

Aiko started to think about that then lost her smile and became suddenly quite thoughtful.

"Wow," a voice distracted Nabiki from her sidelong study of the pair, and suddenly it was her own turn to smile, "Ryo-chan…I see you and Gosunkugi finally made it?"

"Wasn't easy," Gosunkugi looked even more nervous and pale than usual, "There's a lot of security people moving towards this area, tanks and armored cars and everything, like somebody's mobilizing for war…"

"Just about," Frank said as he joined them, holding a pair of odd-looking binoculars, "It's your home-based self defense force moving in to contain the area, like I instructed."

"You mean you're going to attack them?" Akane asked.

"Well I…" Frank suddenly winced as Ukyo's trademark baker's peel suddenly dented against his head and he turned around to glare at her, "That hurt you know."

"You're not going to attack my baby, are you?" Ukyo demanded as she reared back for another strike.

"Ucchan," Nabiki urged, "We really have to talk about this…"

"Ease up, Kid," Frank waved a massive hand to ward off the impending attack, "Nobody's attacking these guys, wouldn't be much point to it. Conventional armaments are useless against Gojira, and that probably holds true for the other one as well."

"Why is that?" Ryonami asked as she took the huge giant in stride with a long, pronounced examination.

"Aside from questions of the mass and density of the bugger's big hide," Frank explained, "Gojira generates a Bioelectric field that reinforces his structural integrity like a personal forcefield. The guy's a walking Cold Fusion generator with a built in plasma storage unit, sort of a living Tokomak with an output in the Gigajoules. Even spent Uranium shells won't make a dent in his hide, and as for shaped-charge warheads you might as well be throwing spitballs. Believe me, your self defense force isn't throwing anything their way so long as I'm calling the shots here. The reason they're being deployed at all is to keep civilians away from here to minimize the potential casualties and property damage."

"Can such a thing have evolved naturally?" Nabiki wondered, "I'd heard rumors that he was a mutant…"

"No," Frank replied as he raised his binoculars to his eyes, "Just one of the biggest damned dragons on the planet. All the Atomic tests ever did was wake him up from a good slumber at the bottom of the Pacific, not to mention ruin his food supply, which was why he first appeared on land to voice his complaint at city hall, like anyone else might do in his place."

"A dragon?" Ranma replied, "You mean he isn't a dinosaur at all?"

"Has about as much in common with one as you do to an Orangutan," Frank explained, "He actually represents an almost extinct breed of wingless dragon of which maybe as few as a dozen others were known to survive…right up until this new bruiser you've got here."

"So that explains what the original Typhon was doing back in the old days," Hercules murmured, "Gaea didn't so much birth him as summon him up from wherever he originally came from."

"Gaea, huh?" Frank mused, "So what did the Titan's equivalent of PMS have against you people here in Nerima? Any ideas?"

"I've got my suspicions," Hercules glared at the two creatures, who were still having their face-off, "If I'm right, then one of my sibs is the guilty party for planting the egg here…only I thought all of Typhon's last brood had been exterminated in the old days."

"No such luck," Frank replied, "A research team unearthed one egg and took it to a special facility I sometimes consult with. They reported it stolen several hours ago. One of your relatives, huh? Can't say I'm too surprised."

"Me neither," Thor-chan sniffed, "You guys make the Frost Giants look like a bunch of Mormons."

"Look whose talking, Pirate-lover," Hercules sniffed, "Just because we Olympians are a little loose in our standards doesn't mean you should blame all of us for every evil in existence. Like with the Pandora's box thing, most of those old legends exaggerated our moral lapses. Guys like Homer have a lot to answer for…"

"Biographers," Frank sniffed, "Don't get me started…"

"What's taking them so long?" Ryoga wondered, "Shouldn't they have started fighting by now?"

"Looks like they're getting serious to me," Ranma noted, and indeed this time the two Goliath creatures were finally closing the distance between them with a display of teeth that seemed truly impressive.

Gojira made the first move, lunging forward as though he really were mounting a Sumo-style attack, but the other lizard nimbly dodged away to one side and swung around to use its tail like a club, knocking the larger monster forward and slightly off balance. Gojira recovered and reoriented towards his antagonist, who gave a massive cry as though to taunt him, then met his next lunge with a leap that brought both hind legs into play.

"Wow," Ryonami murmured faintly, "I wish somebody told me this was going to happen."

"Why?" Gosunkugi asked in faint dismay.

"Are you kidding" Ryonami asked, "The ticket sales would have been phenomenal, and if we'd brought students of the Photography and Video clubs along to take pictures we'd have raked in a fortune on cable rights alone!"

In spite of her concern at the escalation of mayhem visible only a kilometer away, Nabiki felt a swelling of pride as she glanced rather fondly at Ryonami.

Gojira did not seem to take very kindly to being bashed around by the newcomer, but rather than lunge forward he reared to his full height as his spiny back fins started to glow. His mouth shot open, and a jet of plasma erupted from his jaws to strike an area just to one side of the creature, then he shot a second jet at the other side, hemming the other creature in by this maneuver.

"Kami!" Ranma gasped, "Did you guys see that?"

"He really is a dragon," Nabiki said in realization, then started in even greater surprise when the other creature retaliated in kind, firing a jet of plasma that forced Gojira back and created a wall of flame to separate them.

"Baby shoots fire?" Ukyo said in astonishment, then grinned as she cried, "KICK HIS BUTT, BABY! Show the old guy he's not so hot any more! There's a new Monster on the block and…"

"Ucchan," Perfume said in concern, "Are you feeling all right?"

"Man," Aiko said, "This fight is making me hungry! Sure wish I'd brought some snack foods…oh, thank you!" she reacted in pleased surprise when Kasumi handed her a candied rice ball.

"Uh oh," Thor-chan remarked, "I think the big guy's getting serious…"

Indeed, Gojira appeared to have run out of patience with the agile newcomer and surprised everyone by lunging forward, diving through the wall of fire to tackle the other creature, which seemed surprised at this maneuver. The two went down in a heap and began rolling over the dirt and asphalt, crushing everything in their wake as they sought to get into the right position to assert primacy in the encounter.

"Hiyaa," Shampoo said as she came up alongside Nabiki, "No look now, Spatula Girl, it look like you baby about to get own ass kicked."

"I don't think so, honey," Nabiki said faintly as she stared in disbelief.

"What the heck is he doing?" Aiko blinked her eyes as everyone else joined her in blank astonishment.

Indeed, Gojira had come up on top of the other creature and was proceeding to force his opponent to lay face-first in the dirt while he held its legs spread wide and…

"Oh my," Frank remarked, "I was afraid it'd be something like this…"

"What's he doing to my baby?" Ukyo asked in round-eyed dismay.

"Kicking her ass?" Perfume supplied rather hesitantly.

"Uh," Hercules blinked, "I don't know how to tell you this, kid, but the big guy isn't 'kicking' your baby's ass…he's doing something down there, but it's not kicking…"

"Trust you to pick up on that," Thor-chan murmured faintly.

"He's…?" Ranma faltered at saying the words aloud as almost everyone else drew the same conclusion about what they were seeing.

"He's gay?" Ryoga hazarded a guess, which earned him some funny looks from those around him.

"Oh no," Beatrice smiled, "Did I forget to mention that when I was examining the creature earlier I determined that it's sex was female?"

"Oh yeah," Aiko snorted, "And you only NOW felt like sharing this bit of news with us, Beiko?"

"Well, there were other subjects on my mind," Beatrice replied, "But I suppose, in retrospect, it might have profited you all to know that Baby is a female of her species."

"No wonder," Frank sniffed, "I kind thought the old guy was acting a bit peevish lately. Imagine if you went thousands of years without a good lay. No wonder he walked off the island…he must have had a sense that a good looking chick like that was about to arrive on the scene."

Ukyo finally recovered from her own surprise, and now her tone had an entirely different note of outrage, "Hey! He can't be doing that with her! She underaged!"

"Ucchan," Nabiki covered her eyes, "We really, really have to have that talk…"

"Somehow I don't think he's too worried about checking her ID," Thor-chan remarked, "Or anything else not concerned with her plumbing…" she suddenly winced as her own hammer rapped against her head, then she turned a nervous look towards Sif and said, "Oh, uh…hi Hon. What did I do this time?"

"I thought as much," Sif growled, "That generally smug attitude, those condescendingly sexist remarks, that unbelievable arrogance and chauvinistic pride of yours…I should have recognized them anywhere!"

"Uh…Sif," Thor-chan backed away, "Hon…I can explain everything if you'll just let me…"

"What's her problem?" Frank glanced from his intimate study of the two Lizards and their mating antics to take note of the blond Goddess who was advancing on the redhead while brandishing Mjolner, Thor's Hammer..

"That's Thor," Hercules nodded to the panicking redhead.

"Sorry to hear that," Frank sniffed, "I feel pretty Thor myself at the…Waitaminute! Thor? That's you, big guy?"

"In the flesh," Thor-chan said nervously, "Sort-of."

Frank's eyes narrowed as he growled, "Wait…this story…it's got the word Jusenkyo in it someplace, right?"

"How did you guess?" Hercules grunted.

"Never mind," Frank grit his teeth and went back to studying the two writhing creatures, "So that miserable place is still in existence, huh? I knew I should have blown it up myself a hundred years ago, but the historical preservation society would have nailed my sallow hide. Next thing you know an old woman riding a stick will show up and start rapping my head like a Chinese gong…"

"You mean Great Grandmother?" Shampoo asked brightly, then threw her arms around Nabiki and said, "You so clever you figure out how to make giant beasts happy, Airen. From sound of things they be at it for next few hours."

"Which reminds me, Sempai," Ryonami noted as she moved closer to Nabiki and handed her several sheets of computer paper, "About that information you had us research, Gosunkugi and I found out some more data to add to that last report. If you have a moment to read this…"

"I think I can manage it," Nabiki said as she slipped an arm loose from the Amazon's glomp and took the paper one-handed in order to read it, then did a double take and said, "Nani?"

"What is it, Oneechan?" Akane asked her.

"I would say, at a guess, that it is a confidential memo concerning the activities of Alison and me during our time together at Graviton," Beatrice surprised with folded arms, "I was expecting you would have someone look it up for you, but you needn't have bothered. I would have been happy to tell you all about it…eventually."

"Yeah," Aiko snorted, "Tell her all about the mess you made by always attacking me every morning on the way to school!"

"You exaggerate, Alison, it was hardly every day, and as for the mess 'we' made," Beatrice arched her tone as she corrected, " I seem to recall that you did your own fair share of property damage, even if I will freely confess to being the primary aggressor."

"You got us in a lot of trouble back then," Aiko clenched her fists at the memories, "My parents hardly would let me out of the house for weeks because of your stupid feud! If your father hadn't been so rich that he could buy you out of trouble…"

"My father is the last thing I want to be reminded of at the moment," Beatrice said coolly, "And I will thank you to remember that in the future."

"Yeah, like you remember that I don't want to be called Alison," Aiko snorted, "You know, Beiko…for somebody who's so awfully smart you can be so dumb at times…"

"Are you going to be blaming me for the past forever, Alison?" Beatrice narrowed her eyes, "I've told you I've changed, can't you let bygones be bygones?"

"Don't call me Alison!" Aiko stormed up to within spitting distance of the other girl, "And for another thing…!"

Beatrice suddenly smiled, removed her helmet visor and grabbed the redhead into her arms to plant an unexpected kiss on her lips, then held her out part way and murmured in a sensual voice, "My place or yours?"

"Ah…hah…?" Aiko blinked, looking so stunned that she could have been knocked over by the proverbial feather.

Nabiki hid a smirk as she murmured, "I was wondering when they were finally going to do that."

"Cut it out, you two," Akane grinned, "What do you think you are, a couple of lizards?"

"Hmm," Beatrice mused without taking her eyes off her dumbstruck companion, "They do seem to have the right idea, don't they? Making love is a lot more fun than making war…don't you agree?"

"Gah…ah…" Aiko suddenly went crimson and glanced away with a confused expression.

"Sure are noisy," Ranma rubbed his ears with his fingers, pretending to ignore the girl-on-girl exchange taking place before him in favor of the other wild encounter, "Are you sure they're enjoying that?"

"Oh yeah," Hercules snickered as he ignored the plight of his granddaughter and watched the two monsters doing something that would have given the editors of National Geographic nightmares, "You can see how the big guy's in Elysium by now. Sounds to me as if he's having the best sex of his life."

"One thing worries me, though," Nabiki said, "At the rate Baby was growing…any chance she might be fertile?"

"Fertile?" Ukyo blinked.

"I would bet honest money on that," Beatrice smiled as she turned a look Ukyo's way, "After all, the very fact that you are pregnant is one of the many things that made the creature react to you in such a positive manner. You are giving off special pheromones to which her sensitive nostrils are acutely attuned, and while such things would rarely affect a lizard brain, the sympathetic resonance of the bond you forged with the creature means that it has sought to create its own special state of fecundity in hopes of such an event as this."

"Besides which," Hercules added, "I don't exactly think they make condoms in his size," he nodded towards Gojira.

Just then the sound of helicopters finally grew loud enough to drown out the noises produced by the two creatures and everyone turned to see the Kuno Company logo on five identical craft, which were circling to find an open area for a landing.

"Ah, right on time," Frank smiled, turning to study the kitchen equipment before adding, "With this set up we ought to be able to brew up a large enough batch of sedative to trank both of those beasties once they've had their fun and are through copulating."

"That's why I told my folks to bring the equipment here," Nabiki looked towards Ukyo with an apology, "Sorry there wasn't enough time to consult with you, Ucchan, but I thought you'd understand."

"I guess I do," Ukyo sighed, "But are you sure putting them to sleep is the answer?"

"Just until we can ship them back to Monster Island," Frank replied, "Besides, it shouldn't be too hard in Big G's case. He's like a lot of guys…he goes for broke, shoots his wad, then pretty soon he's exhausted and he'll just collapse and roll over."

"Hiyaa," Shampoo nodded, "I know what that like."

Nabiki blinked, "Huh? Hey-!" then she saw the teasing look in her wife's eyes and knew that she was being none-too-gently ribbed.

Beatrice stared for a moment, then said, "She called you Airen a moment ago…Chinese for Beloved."

"So?" Nabiki tried to sound nonchalant.

Beatrice smiled, "Don't tell me you went to the village of Joketsuzoku in your cursed form and defeated this lovely lady here. I have heard what happens when an outsider male defeats an Amazon warrior."

"So have I," Aiko chuckled, having somewhat recovered from her surprise of a moment back, "That's how my dad wound up marrying my mom, although to hear her tell it she was the one who had to get him motivated into doing it."

Beatrice was staring at Shampoo as she continued, "I can't help but noticing…is the child your own?"

"Uh, yeah," Nabiki tried to sound more nonchalant than she was feeling at the moment while Shampoo just looked at her smugly.

Beatrice slowly turned around with a smile and looked at Aiko, "So…when an outsider female defeats an Amazon it does not necessarily mean that the Amazon has to kill her. The Amazon has the option of choosing to marry the woman who defeats her…and you are part Amazon by birthright…"

"Yeah?" Aiko said nervously, "What are you getting a-uh-Beiko? Why are you looking at me like that?"

Beatrice continued to smile, only more with speculation.

Aiko backed away, "You're crazy! You don't think…that's nuts!"

"Aiko," Beatrice purred the name, "I'm ready to have that fight with you now that you were asking for earlier in the day…"

"Yikes!" Aiko turned around and started running for it while Beatrice took to the air and flew after her, calling out, "Stand still and let me beat you, Alison! Don't you want to play with me for old time's sake?"

As everyone else just stared at the fleeing pair Nabiki at long last chuckled, "Y'know…somehow I think those two just might fit in around here after all."

"You think?" Ranma said as she shared in her amusement, shaking his head as he added, "That lady doesn't know what she's getting herself into."

"It what get into her she worried about," Shampoo snickered then said, "You ready to help us make potion for love-struck monsters, Ucchan?"

"Why not," Ukyo shrugged, giving the larger male lizard a sour look as she added, "Beats using a gardening hose, but when this is done I'm going to want to have words with that guy about doing the right thing for my baby."

Perfume and Ranma exchanged worried looks, then silently turned their appeals towards the heavens…

Continued

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