Ronin Warriors Fan Fiction ❯ Koi wa Kurushimi ❯ Time to turn back and descend the stair, ( Chapter 3 )

Koi wa Kurushimi
By Djinn Hashiba-Maxwell

This chapter is dedicated to WILDFIRE'S FLAME, who knew all the members of Dir en grey! You go, girl!! ^_^

And indeed there will be a time
To wonder, "Do I dare?" and, "Do I dare?" --
Time to turn back and descend the stair

- The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock
- T.S. Eliot

* * *

"Do you know him?" Seiji asked the captain of the guard, and the slightly older man bent over the corpse, his brow furrowed in thought. Then suddenly he recoiled.

"Hai, I do! He's served here for years, since before I came. Shutendoji was his name, I recall." He replied. "I can't believe ... all this time, all along, he's been a mercenary? And now he accepted a contract to kill the girl he defends?" The captain shook his head sadly. "A nasty business."

Seiji roughly tugged the arrow out of the dead man's mangled throat. "This shot was unbelievable." He said. "Who fired?"

"Shuu Rowan, the new archer, Date-sama." A guard replied. "He was stationed on the rooftop on the opposite side of the courtyard."

"See that he is rewarded." Seiji said succinctly, then turned to leave.

"Date-sama!" The guard captain called abruptly. Seiji paused. "Shuu Rowan's cousin, the General Shuu Rei Fuan, is going to be passing through Gifu, and is planning to stop and pay his respects to Aito-kyo." He called. "I thought you might like to know."

Seiji nodded curtly. "If that is all?"

* * *

"You are to be commended."

"I did the job I was hired for, that's all." Touma replied humbly.

"I have never met someone with aim as perfect as yours." Seiji continued, unperturbed. Touma seemed almost to blush.

"I'll allow that my aim is more precise than most ..."

Seiji rested a hand on Touma's shoulder and leaned closer. "You are amazing, Rowan." He whispered.

Touma held his breath, waiting for Seiji's lips on his. But Seiji just hesitated a moment, and then pulled away. The blonde cleared his throat nervously. Touma sighed. What was Seiji waiting for?

"Your cousin. Rei Fuan. He is coming to Takayama." Seiji commented, clearing his throat. "He will be coming here to pay his respects to Aito-kyo, so you will have the opportunity to visit with him."

Touma blinked. "Oh. Indeed?" He said casually. "How nice. I've not seen him in years." He turned and headed past the blonde mercenary, but flinched and hunched over at the other man's side, faking a pain in his side, near his hip. Seiji put an arm around him quickly.

"Daijoubu ka?" He asked, unduly worried.

Touma made his laugh breathless, familiar enough with actual pain to fake it. "Hai, daijoubu. I slipped on the roof earlier and bruised my hip, that's all."

"You should get it seen to." Seiji said, brow furrowing.

"I'm fine." Touma grasped Seiji's hand at the wrist and pressed his hand over the sharp bone of his hip, holding his own over top of it. His face was very near to Seiji's. "See?" He whispered, his breath ruffling the blonde's hair. "Daijoubu."

Seiji swallowed hard.

Seiji's lips were soft against his, barely there at first, his kiss slow, undemanding and almost hesitant. It was totally unlike the fast, searing, conquest kisses he was used to. The hand Touma held against his hip tensed, clutching the fabric of his kimono. Seiji's free arm wound around his slim waist, drawing the younger boy closer, kissing him deeper, but no less controlled or gentle. Touma felt a strange and unfamiliar sensation of falling, he was getting dizzy from the sweetness of it. He had never been kissed like this before - the simple touch of lips for it's own sake, not a prelude to something violent.

He found he was forced to suck in a huge gulp of air when Seiji pulled his lips away. Touma blinked a few times, trying to clear his vision of the pretty stars that danced in front of his eyes. He felt the body pressed against his tense, probably as Seiji finally realized what he'd just done.

Touma's mind returned to full speed function and he trailed one hand up Seiji's arm, relaxing the blonde without much effort. The other hand he kept over Seiji's, rubbing small circles on the underside of his wrist with his thumb. He tangled fingers into the blonde stands at the base of Seiji's neck. His indigo eyes fell, half-lidded, and he flickered his tongue out over his damp lips, as if to taste the kiss.

"Seiji?" he whispered huskily, making the name a question.

This kiss was one of desperation. Seiji pressed Touma even closer to him, crushing his lips against the younger boys. The hand on his hip slid around to the small of his back. Touma responded carefully, not wanting to push too hard, and wanting to make sure that Seiji realized this was all his idea.

Touma lips parted with little persuasion and a tongue slid hotly into his mouth. A hand gripped the back of his kimono, and he was leaning so far back that he was sure that he was about to fall over. He clutched at the blonde's shoulders for balance, curling one leg around Seiji's.

This time when their lips parted, Seiji was the one that was blinking dazedly. His breathing was quick and shallow, as if he'd been running. Slowly, the hand at the back of Touma's kimono released, the arms around his waist slackened and moved away.

"I ..." Seiji started, then abruptly looked away.

Touma furrowed his brow. Surely Seiji was over his attack of reason by now. Touma moved away from him, just slightly, and made a soft noise deep in his throat. Seiji's eyes were drawn back to him. Touma knew that his indigo eyes were half-closed, his lips kiss-swollen and slightly parted, decadently. Seiji swallowed hard.

"Rowan, you ..."

Touma cocked his head, waiting for the response. Usually the proposition came at this point, but Touma knew better than to expect that from Seiji. So what? A hot denial? A endearment? A question? For once Touma couldn't predict it ... it was strangely fascinating.

"You should probably get some rest." Seiji said at length. "You need it." He took a step back, as if he did not trust himself. "Oyasumi, Rowan. See you in the morning."

* * *

"What was that?!" Ryo demanded with a growl. The tradesman he had grabbed by the collar blinked, wide-eyed.

"Nanda?" He asked, voice trembling.

"About Aito-kyo!" Ryo replied, shaking the smaller man.

"A-an assassin sent after his d-daughter was k-killed last night." The man repeated. "Ap-pparently, he was disguised as a guard. T-they're saying ..." he hesitated, and Ryo shook him again. "They're saying he bears the brand of the Akuko!" he finished.

The Akuko was a mercenary enclave of which Touma had briefly been a member. They were the best of the best, and they marked all their men - and women - with a small brand, the shape of an arrowhead, place unobtrusively on the hip. Touma had sliced of his brand with his wakazashi, but a faint mark of it remained, visible if one was looking for it.

Ryo released the man, eyes clouding. Touma ... it couldn't be.

And yet, how could it not?

* * *

"An Akuko?" Touma repeated. "Then others will follow when it is discovered that he has failed." He took a long puff of his rolled tobacco cigarette. "Akuko take their jobs very seriously."

"Indeed." Seiji said darkly, personal concerns momentarily forgotten. "I'm surprised we even caught him; I thought Akuko better trained."

//You mean I caught him.// Touma scowled. //Akuko may be good, but I'm better.// Aloud, he humbled said, "It was probably just luck on my part."

"Oh, that's not what I meant." Seiji said quickly. " You are skilled, there is no doubt of that. I refer to the fact that we found the brand, it was rather easy to miss. The guard captain failed to note it in his examination."

"Baka." Touma muttered, too low for Seiji to hear. His opinion of the guard was rather low.

"You are absolutely right." Seiji agreed, having apparently heard despite Touma's low tone. He frowned. "I will be speaking to him. The brand was not that small ... if his examination had be thorough ..."

"Let us talk of something else." Touma prodded. "All this business talk bores me."

Seiji nodded, smiling slightly. "Are you looking forward to seeing your cousin?"

"Rei Fuan! Most definitely. It has been several years since our last meeting, as I mentioned before. With his army business, he was always away. I would imagine he has changed much in the interim." Touma replied, stretching against the roof's sun-warmed clay shingles.

"People never change all that much." Seiji observed, shielding his eyes from the sun as he looked off at the horizon.

Touma laughed softly, barely audible. "No, I suppose you're right." He sighed. "People always stay more or less the same."

Seiji turned and took in the young archer's profile. The sunlight on his night-pale flesh made it seem as if he glowed in the fading illumination of the sunset. His eyes were closed and his lips thoughtlessly parted. Seiji could remember the feel of those lips beneath his own, finally parting for him, drowning in a flavor as indescribable as the night sky, the body under him firm and strong, but yielding. The idea of having control over a body as strong as your own, that would yield but never submit, was heaven for a warrior. Something that could be taken and yet not depleted. Used but not conquered.

He noticed abruptly that the archer's breathing had slowed and evened.

"Rowan. Are you asleep?" He asked. An incoherent mumble was his response. Seiji couldn't understand why the younger boy was so tired; he'd slept almost the entire day to prepare for night duty. Now he dropped off as if he hadn't slept in days.

Seiji sighed and lifted the blue haired boy into his arms, the long blue braid swinging below him. He was shocked at how light the other boy was. He was so strong, and yet somehow so delicate ... as small as a child ...

He shifted his grip as he slid into the building through a window; the other boy hissed and awoke with a start, blinking at Seiji dazedly.

"You fell asleep." Seiji explained.

"Ah." Touma responded, pulling away from the blonde. Seiji noticed, before Touma turned away, a thin line of blood soaked through the shoulder of his kimono. The boy had suffered what looked like a sword wound to his upper left arm, just below the shoulder.

A wound below the shoulder ...

No connection was made. "You're bleeding." Seiji said calmly. "Daijoubu ka?"

"Hai!" Touma said quickly. "Daijoubu, hontou ni. Don't worry." He quickly put a hand to his shoulder, covering the blood. "I can take care of myself, Seiji-san."

"I'm sure." The elder responded dryly. "You're to report in an hour. Go and get some sleep until then if you are that tired."

The other boy nodded and turned. "I'll do that. Thank you, Seiji-san."

* * *

It was about an hour two hours later when Seiji crouched next to Touma's post. "Any trouble?" He asked.

"None." Touma replied. "It's dead quiet. Akuko must have decided to take a sabbatical." He smiled lightly at the blonde, leaning back so that his kimono fell slightly open. Seiji's mouth went dry as his lips tingled with the desire to taste that flesh. "Am I really needed on guard tonight? Akuko will take some time to regroup." Touma continued. Breath slightly stirring blonde hair. Seiji hadn't realized the other boy was so close.

"I ..." he turned to answer, but their faces were even closer than he had suspected. Hi nose bumped against the other boy's, lips grazed his chin. Whatever he had meant to say was forgotten. He just froze, looking into deep indigo eyes.

Something about that thought was familiar, but it disappeared when Touma closed the gap and kissed him.

The soft lips against his moved with more insistence then they had before. More passion, more promise were laced into this kiss. Seiji pushed back, pressing the smaller boy back against the shingles. Touma squirmed at the discomfort of the clay pressing into his spine, but never thought to break the kiss. Their mouths slid open at the same moment, tongues caressing within the vacuum of parted lips. The kiss was so intense, Seiji did not even realize that neither of them had closed their eyes. He still looked into the other boy's eyes ...

Deep indigo eyes ...

...

... he had seen those eyes before!!

He pushed away; Touma made a guttural noise of protest, eyes clouded. Seiji paid him no heed, grabbing the left sleeve of his kimono and yanking it down. He saw what he both knew and feared he would see - a thick white bandage, stained slightly with a thin line of blood, just below the shoulder. He grabbed Touma hard by that arm, right over the wound, and squeezed until Touma let out a grunt of pain.

"I gave you this." The blonde growled.

Touma shuddered; his arm burned with the pain. "Iii- ... iya ... "

"Don't lie to me, boy." Seiji responded, gripping tighter, making Touma struggle for freedom. "I know I did. Your eyes ... I remember them. Such a memorable shade." Touma squirmed, the pain making him light headed. Finally he slipped once more into his innocent mask.

"Seiji please!" He cried, eyes filling with crocodile tears. "You're hurting me!"

Seiji's grip on his arm spasmodically released. Touma let out a grunt of pain as he fell once more back against the cool clay tiles. Some of the stitches had popped, he could feel it. He gasped for breath, staring up at the unsympathetic blonde.

"That's why your hands were shaking." Seiji said coldly. "Because you were nursing that wound. That's why you were so tired, from the blood you lost. Very impressive." He drew his sword in a swift stroke. "Give me one good reason not to slit your throat right now."

Touma cocked his head for a moment, then lifted his chin, baring his throat. "I have no reason to give. I do not beg, I do not wallow. Kill me." It was a calculated risk, Seiji could easily call his bluff and slit him open, but it was a risk Touma had to take.

Seiji swallowed. "What is your name? Your real name."

Touma grinned, lowering his chin. "Don't you know? There's only one assassin more famous, more beautiful, and more mysterious than Date Seiji."

Seiji blinked. "You're ... ?" He shook his head. "No. You couldn't be."

The other smirked. "Who couldn't I be?"

"Hashiba Touma."

He bobbed his head, the closest he could get to a bow from his current position. "Yoroshiku."

Seiji shook his head. "You're just a child!"

"It seemed that I was man enough for you."

"Urusai!" Seiji threatened with the sword. "Hashiba Touma is old and wise, not young and headstrong. He would not have been caught."

"And Date Seiji," Touma replied, "is young, handsome, and cold. He would not have kissed an archer on a city roof. We both have our personas; they aren't always right."

Seiji looked him over, still obviously uncertain. "Prove it." He said. "Prove you are Hashiba Touma."

"Why does it matter, if you are going to kill me?"

"I want to know whose blood will sully my sword!"

Touma smiled slightly, and lifted his kimono immodestly above his hips. "Only one man has ever turned his back on the Akuko and survived it. You can see the scar where I was branded, and where I cut that brand from my flesh." And indeed, there was a small, vaguely triangular scar on his hipbone, in just the same place as an Akuko brand. The coincidence was too great, considering his skill with a bow and his infiltration skill. It had to be.

"You're him." Seiji breathed.

Touma smirked. "I don't blame you for wanting me. Stronger men have fallen." He shrugged, dropping his kimono back over his thighs. "I seduced a princess once, in Egypt. I murdered her father right in front of her, and she begged me to let her carry my sword, coated in his blood though it was."

"And your sister." Seiji murmured.

"Oh, Shizuru. The famous contract." Touma shrugged. "Business if business ... actually she was good with a crossbow, so I offered to let her join me, but she refused. Damned morality. 'Thou shalt not kill'." He laughed. "Dear girl. She muttered psalms for my soul as I pierced her heart."

Seiji felt physically ill.

"Get out. You are too filthy even to kill." Seiji heaved. "Get out. Now."

Touma smirked and bowed slightly, before jumping off the exterior side of the roof. Seiji didn't even watch him go. It was all he could do to keep from vomiting.

How could he have been so wrong about him?

* * *

Djinn: The gluttony of you people is beyond description! No sooner do I have one chapter out than you want the next ... it's a good thing I already have the entire fic written.

Kaiya: Djinn you fool!! Don't tell them that! They are like ravenous wolves, they will devour you alive! Oh, the horror, the horror.

Djinn: O_o *turns to Nai* So ... she got into the cough syrup again, huh?

Nai: Basically.