Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ The Power Of Fire ❯ Chapter 3

Ami was still slumped in Rei's arms when she awoke. She couldn't recall what time it was when she eventually fell asleep but she was sure it had been past 2a.m. at least.

Looking over at the clock she groaned as she saw it was already 11a.m. At least it's the weekend and not a weekday otherwise all the girls would be coming around at this time.

Ami let her head drop backwards again, suddenly realising how warm it was with Rei around her. Sighing resignedly Ami snuggled back down into Rei's arms feeling the soaring emotion of joy at being able to be so close to her friend without having to answer to anyone.

Breathing in the sweet scent of Rei's perfume Ami pulled herself in tighter, begging the desperation not to come close to her today and amazingly while lying in Rei's arms it abated from touching her.

Ami was sure she had been lying there for at least an hour before the front door of the Temple banged into place.

"Usagi!" The cry of Makoto as another crash followed the first one.

"Careful Buns-head," the short chuckle of Haruka…

"It's not a matter of being careful, she couldn't NOT trip over if her life depended on it," Chibiusa…

"Don't forget that you share half of her DNA Chibiusa," Minako…

"That's right, and you are named after her," Mamoru…

Ami was stiffened in Rei's arms; she couldn't find the strength to move. Secretly she wished her friends had not come, she felt unbelievably safe in Rei's company, something she hadn't truly felt for the last two months.

"Is Rei even here?" Usagi…

"It doesn't seem that way," Setsuna…

"Is that unusual?" Michiru…

"Very."

Hearing the chorus of her friends Ami squeezed her eyes shut tight wishing that she could disappear. Her eyes were still closed when Usagi opened the door to Rei's room, revealing the two closely entwined friends lying atop Rei's bed.

"Rei…" Usagi started.

"And Ami?" Finished Minako.

The noise of the intrusion caused Rei to stir, her eyes shooting open to find the tortured grimace of desperation that had stolen her friend's smile back on Ami's face. Her friends could obviously see she was awake but she was more worried about Ami at the present time. The tightly, squeezed eyes of Ami were beginning to emit little droplets of water.

She's terrified… The thought wasn't an old idea, it was just something that had popped into her head but as soon as she thought it she knew she was right. What is Ami so terrified of? Rei scowled at not being able to find an answer, suddenly realising that all her friends were now blocking the door to her bedroom and looking at the pair with wide, shocked eyes.

Rei knew the normal thing to do was to let go of Ami but the way she looked so vulnerable, so frightened, and just so child-like made it impossible for Rei to move.

Looking up at the group of friends at the door she motioned for them to go into the sitting room.

As soon as Ami heard the footsteps recede to the sitting room her face released from its contortion of fear, the movement not escaping Rei's notice.

"Ami…" Rei whispered it, shocked that her answer had come so soon.

Ami's scared of us? That doesn't make sense…

"I'm sorry Rei," whispered back Ami, disentangling herself from Rei's arms and feeling the desperation swoop back down upon her as soon as she was free. Ami winced as she realised the desperation had come back with reinforcements. She knew the assumptions that her friends would make and it made it almost impossible to move. Ami struggled to her feet hoping that her legs didn't give out.

"You can stay here Ami, I'll go talk to them," Rei looked Ami straight in the eyes and was jolted by just how much emotion was swirling behind them; anxiety, dread but most of all, loneliness.

Why would Ami feel lonely? We're all here. More questions that Rei couldn't herself answer bounced around but she couldn't grasp any of them for any amount of time, her eyes still locked on Ami's, were seeming to drink in all the emotions and coalesce them inside her as well.

Ami was unable to speak; Rei could see that much so Rei got up, not bothering to change her tear-stained and bed-ravaged robe, leaving Ami to avert the questions that Rei was sure she was hardly ready to answer, not if last night was anything to go by.

"Hey guys," said Rei as she entered the sitting room that was currently busting with visitors. Makoto, Minako, Mamoru, Usagi, Chibiusa, Hotaru, Setsuna, Haruka and Michiru all sat at different levels, all with the same slightly unsettled look on their faces.

"Where's Ami?" Usagi looked about to burst into tears and a protective emotion flared itself inside Rei like nothing she had ever felt before.

"She's in bed. She needs rest Usagi. She could also do with some quiet but you made that almost impossible didn't you?" Rei hadn't meant to shout but when the words burst forth that came at an extremely high decibel.

The words cut into Usagi, Rei could see that but for once the maternal side didn't rear it's head to make sure Usagi was alright, instead all Rei could feel inside her was the borrowed emotions of Ami's; the anxiety, and the dread, the loneliness that made no sense to Rei but which gave her a horrible gut-wrenching feeling deep in the pit of her stomach.

"Rei, that's not very nice," Makoto scowled slightly. She could see that Rei was distraught and something about it remind her abruptly of Ami's own distraught. Rei was never that harsh on Usagi and Makoto could see it wasn't intentional but she could also see a storm building in Rei and that was something nobody would want to be in front of.

"Is she hurt?" Michiru's voice was so soft and sad, laced with its own pain that it stopped Rei's rage in its track.

"You know something," Rei had no idea how she came to the conclusion but again she felt as if she had accidently stumbled upon the truth without really meaning to.

"She came to see me last night," whispered Michiru hardly loud enough for Rei to hear. Haruka had obviously heard this before because she wrapped her arm around her lover's shoulder in comfort, urging her to continue.

"She wanted to know about mine and Haruka's relationship. She wanted to know about how it had affected us when we figured out who we were, what we were…" The words trailed at the end and all of them knew she wasn't talking about her and Haruka being soldiers.

"Ami's…" Minako blinked wildly as she tried to comprehend the information.

"She's more confused than anything right now I think," said Haruka, "Lost, I would describe it. She's lost and I don't think she can pull herself out of it alone." Rei was taken aback as Haruka stared at her intently as she spoke.

What does she mean? Ami can't pull herself out of it alone? Are one of us meant to help her? How on earth would we do that? Rei couldn't catch any of the thoughts to make them try to make sense but she then had the dreadful sensation that Ami wasn't in bed anymore, that she wasn't even in the Temple.

"I've got to go," murmured Rei as she took off in the sprint, skidding to a stop outside her bedroom to find that it was indeed empty. Her shoulders slumped in on themselves before she took off again, leaving her gaggle of friends behind her totally mystified.

"What happened?" murmured Mamoru as they all stared at the empty bed.

"She heard us," concluded Michiru bowing her head sadly.

 

~~~~~

 

Usagi sat at the phone all night; she could hear the gentle sounds of Makoto and Minako breathing in her room. Why can't we help you Ami? The thought was a continuous one that only deemed to circle around her head annoyingly.

"I can't take it anymore!" Usagi shouted to the quiet night, probably waking up the whole household in the process but she couldn't sit around waiting anymore. She hadn't been sure whether to believe Rei and Michiru when they both said they could call if they found Ami but she had thought better of not trusting them and had stayed behind instead of helping them search.

"Ami must have been found by now, its freezing and the middle of the night. If she isn't she'll get sick," Makoto stood at the doorframe of Usagi's bedroom with Chibiusa and Hotaru behind her.

"But how are we going to find her without getting sick as well? We don't have a car, that's why we left Michiru, Haruka, Rei and Mamoru to try and find her," Minako tripped as she came out of the bedroom still talking even though she had recently face-planted into the hall rug.

"We won't have to 'find' her, I'll bet she's either at Rei's, Mamoru's or Haruka's place. We just need to go there." Chibiusa folded her arms at her words; she was obviously determined to come with them whatever the cost.

"Good thinking Chibiusa, everyone get a coat and let's go," said Usagi as she heard the distinct sounds of her mother and father rustling in their room, "But ah, be quick will you."

Usagi waited at the door impatiently as she watched her friends pull on their coats and shoes. Her mother came into the hallway just as she was pushing Makoto, the last of the quartet, through the door.

"Usagi, what're you doing? It's 4a.m." Her mother was still half asleep and was swaying left to right in her dream-like haze.

"I've got to go find Ami, bye mama," Usagi quickly flew out of the door and threw it closed, almost running into Makoto's back at the gate.

"We don't need to go far," said Minako as she crossed the road to where Haruka had just parked her car.

"Ami?" asked Usagi, rushing over with Minako to where Haruka stood leaning against the car.

"She's with Michiru at the moment. We've called Rei and Mamoru already. I'm here to tell you that I don't think you should see Ami for awhile, at least not until she's calmed down enough to be rational. She can run like the wind when she wants to that girl." Haruka's brow was creased with concern; it was easy enough to see that Ami hadn't been in the best emotional state when they had found her.

"Okay Haruka, if that's what you and Michiru think is best, but would you mind if we came and talked to you and Michiru?" Usagi sounded defeated, like she was expecting Haruka to say No to her.

"Okay, but if I'm going to take all of you it's going to be a bit squishy." Haruka gazed at the group of five, concern mimicked on each of their faces.

"That's okay, Hotaru and I are only small," smiled Chibiusa as she opened the back door to Haruka's car, starting to push Minako and Makoto in first.

"Well then, let's go," said Haruka.

Haruka obviously wants to get back quickly otherwise she probably wouldn't let us all come at once, thought Usagi as she got in the passenger side, sitting next to Haruka. I wonder where they found her?

 

~~~~~

 

Ami held herself together, her arms wrapped so tightly around her chest that her fingers and knuckles had turned white. She was sure that Michiru thought she was asleep. I wish, thought Ami as she shivered again, the blanket around her giving her no protection from her own thoughts and emotions.

She didn't know what had come over her at Rei's, but the need to run from it was like an overpowering urge. The urge had been similar to the one when swimming underwater and you could wish to stay there forever, drown, but the urge for life preservation, the urge to breathe pushes you upward with no acknowledgement to the being's actual thoughts or wishes. She had needed to breathe after being underwater for so long, and she had breathed, for awhile anyway. She was back underwater again now.

Why can't I just tell them? Why can't I trust them? Ami's face contorted with the pain each of the questions brought her. Because they might not love you anymore, they might not want to be your friend. The answer she got was true, that was how she felt but she was nowhere nearer to reconciling herself with it.

Ami felt as if her body was physically trying to pull itself apart, even though it stayed whole. There were two Ami's in there now and they couldn't co-exist, even she knew that. There was the old-Ami, she was smart, neat and she was loved. Then there was the new-Ami, she was just lost… And probably not loved… The thought sent waves of shock through her system again and again.

She was being intently watched by Michiru and she knew it but she couldn't stop whatever was happening to her, so she didn't try to fight it anymore. She didn't have the strength anymore.

"It's okay Ami," whispered Michiru, coming and placing a hand on the blue-haired beauty's head.

Ami felt like negating the statement but she was biting her lip so hard it felt as though her muscles had permanently clenched themselves that way and that if she ever tried to move them again that they would simply shatter.

"It's okay Ami," she whispered the words again, trying to coax Ami out of the self-employed shell which she had encased herself in. It was simple protection, Michiru knew that but it also held many long-believed emotions and thoughts that she was sure even Ami didn't know she had.

"Ami," it was Rei's voice that spoke so close to her, her friend's whose safety allowed her hands to be pried away from her tear-sodden face and reveal the maddening truth underneath.

"Oh Ami," whispered Rei wrapped her arms around the small ball of torso and limbs that was her friend.

She can hold me together. It was the only thing that made sense to Ami. Rei can hold me together; she has the strength that I don't.

 

~~~~~

 

"Saeko Mizuno speaking," Ami's mother answered the phone at her desk, her eyebrows knitting together. Something was wrong with Ami, she knew it more than anything else, but she couldn't help. She had another two weeks at this hospital…

"It's Usagi, Ami's friend," The voice which came through the line was easily recognisable but it was now laced with incomprehensible sadness.

"What's wrong?" asked Saeko her eyes filling with tears as millions of thoughts raged in her head, giving her scenes of Ami that she didn't want to see at all.

"Ami… She really needs you. Is there anyway you could come home earlier? Anyway at all?" Usagi didn't want to explain how deranged Ami was right now; it would terrify Saeko too much.

"I can't, I'm so sorry. But what's wrong with Ami?" Saeko's voice could barely come out but she somehow forced her vocal cords to work.

"Ms Mizuno to the Emergency Ward. Ms Mizuno to the Emergency Ward." The words were hasty on the speaker system. Saeko was torn between answering the speaker system or staying on the phone. Saeko fought internally before a nurse bounded in her office and made the decision for her, slamming down the phone and dragging Saeko out of her office.

"Mizuno?" repeated Usagi on the phone as it wrung off, signalling that Saeko had hung up on her.

Now what? Thought Usagi as she stared at the four tangled figures of Minako, Makoto, Chibiusa and Hotaru all splayed out on the floor sleeping.