Saiyuki Reload Gunlock Fan Fiction / Saiyuki Reload Fan Fiction / Gensomaden Saiyuki Fan Fiction ❯ Craving Touch ❯ Chapter 6 ( Chapter 6 )

Craving Touch
Chapter 6
By: eternalsailorsolarwind

Disclaimer: Saiyuki and all related characters belong to Minekura Kazuya, Ichijiinsha, Tokyopop, and several other legal entities whose names escape me at the moment. I only play with the characters for fun. ^_^

A/N: Finally! I know some of you were wondering when I would pick this series up again, but I had a nasty case of writer’s block. This chapter is dedicated to Compli_Cait for beta-ing this chapter, and helping me get the flow going again. In Gojyo’s POV, of course.

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Gojyo floated through sleep much like cork floating on the calm surface of a lake, before arriving at full wakefulness like a bobber suddenly surfacing after the fish breaks the line. Blinking, he stared up at the white ceiling of the room where he lay, trying to remember how he got there. He wasn’t exactly surprised that his memories were kind of fuzzy; after all, he was used to getting extremely wasted trying to keep up with Hakkai when the other man drank.

But as he stared at the spider crawling across the ceiling Gojyo realized that he had no hangover. His head ached enough, but he was a connoisseur of hangovers and this wasn’t the same kind of headache. There was no urge to have a heart-to-heart talk with the porcelain god. Instead, it just felt like his head had been split open by Goku’s nyoi-bo.

But hell did he have to piss! Gojyo shifted his weight to roll off the bed, and stopped with a surprised cry of pain. When the hell…? That was when his spotty memories came crashing back to him, making his head throb with each new memory falling into place.

The kappa remembered very well the night when Hakkai had broadly hinted he had no feelings for him. That was the night he decided to drown his sorrows in alcohol. Gojyo wasn’t entirely sure how long he’d been doing that; his memories were short and dim, mainly of drinking and hangovers. A few glimpses of battles fought. But there were very few memories of Hakkai in those pieces of memory. Had he been avoiding Hakkai - or was it the other way around?

“Hey, you awake,” asked a surprisingly quiet voice.

Gojyo twitched in surprise, hissing at the sharp pain it caused. Carefully, he turned to see Goku half in the room, looking concerned.

“Yeah, but I gotta piss. Gimme a hand up, will ya?” Gojyo was shocked at how rusty his voice sounded. How long had it been since he’d used it?

“Nuh uh. Hakkai said to tell him the moment you were awake.”

“Come on, Goku, I gotta pee,” Gojyo whined. “You gonna let me embarrass myself before you go get Hakkai?”

“You don’t need my help to do that, erokappa,” replied Goku, his tone suddenly angry. “Hakkai’s a mess, tryin’ to get you well again.”

Gojyo felt ridiculously pleased by the last half of that statement before he ruthlessly buried it. “Help me to the can, and then you can get Hakkai. Unless you want to tell him why we’d have to change the sheets.”

Grumbling, Goku agreed. The young youkai helped the kappa to the bathroom. After making sure that Gojyo wouldn’t topple over, the golden-eyed young man allowed him his privacy.

Finishing his business, sweating and trembling from the exertion of making it to the bathroom, Gojyo was alarmed by his weakness. He couldn’t ever remember feeling like this before, no matter how much he fought or drank. Splashing water on his face, the red-head was not looking forward to what Hakkai was going to say about his condition, knowing that Hakkai was going to politely skin him alive with soft, yet extremely pointed words.

Stumbling to the door, using the wall to support him, Gojyo opened it, nearly falling backwards in surprise. Instead of Goku, Hakkai waited there, green eyes anxious.

“Gojyo,” asked Hakkai’s overly-pleasant voice. “If you had needed to use the facilities, there was a bedpan in the room.”

“I’m a big boy, Ma,” sulked the kappa. “I made it down the hall to the bathroom.”

“Not without help,” Hakkai pointed out, stepping back to allow Gojyo to come out of the bathroom. “Goku told me you needed to use him as a crutch.”

“Whatever.” Gojyo’s temper was starting to rise at the overly solicitous tone his friend was using. He wasn’t a baby that needed to be coddled. Yeah, he got hurt, but he was getting better, right?

With a sigh, Hakkai moved to stand next to him, placing Gojyo’s arm around his shoulder so he could be used as a living crutch. Gojyo stared at him as the converted youkai took a couple of steps forward, his shock allowing him to be carried along. What the hell was Hakkai doing? Before he could say anything, the sound of a lighter made him turn his head.

Gojyo watched as hooded purple eyes flicked back and forth between himself and Hakkai, as Sanzo inhaled his cigarette. Removing the cancer stick from his mouth, he blew out the smoke.

“Hn.” He smirked, his voice dripping condescension and amusement. “You two idiots deserve each other.”

He passed by them on his way to his own room, deliberately bumping into Hakkai’s shoulder, which pushed the converted youkai against Gojyo. Hakkai stumbled, trying to keep both of them upright. Finally, he regained his balance, and Gojyo could sense his friend’s glare at the monk’s back.

“Come Gojyo,” said Hakkai, irritation plain in his voice, “let’s check your bandages.”

Gojyo knew better than to argue with that tone of voice.

Later, after he’d been fed and Hakkai had helped him to and from the facilities again, Gojyo allowed himself to slip into a light doze as Hakkai changed his bandages. He was able to relax, for the first time in a long while, under the deft, yet still caring fingers of his best friend. If he continued to let himself drift the red head could fool himself into thinking that the brunette’s touches were that of a lover, instead of a healer. His mind floated back to the shitty monk’s words of a few hours earlier. He wondered what Sanzo had meant by them; he was sure that the blonde hadn’t meant what Gojyo wanted them to mean. Hakkai didn’t think of him that way. And yet….

His mind whispered to him, traitorously, that Hakkai had actually touched him, back there in the hall. Had, in fact, half-carried him back to bed after the run-in with the corrupt monk. The healer had also kept him from whining and complaining like he always did when he was hurt. In fact, Gojyo hadn’t been allowed to say a word in the aftermath of the “confrontation.” Not in his own defense for trying to drown himself at the bottom of a bottle, nor in an attempt to make things “normal” again between them.

At this point, even that was better than the awful sense of limbo and dread that hung between them right now.

Making up his mind, Gojyo decided that, first thing in the morning, he was going to try to make things right; back to being best friends with Hakkai. Back to what they’d had before he had allowed his “feelings” to get in the way. But for tonight, he was going to relax and simply enjoy the sensation of Hakkai touching him for a change.

Gojyo had long ago decided he would take what he could get out of life. If this was what he could get, then so be it. He wasn’t willing to give up what he did have reaching for a pipe dream.

A familiar warmth spreading across his chest interrupted the kappa’s thoughts. Hakkai was giving him another healing treatment. He twitched slightly, but didn’t open his eyes. After a few minutes, the warmth ebbed away, leaving him feeling better. The touch of slim fingers against his chest, however, did not stop. The hanyou resisted the urge to open his eyes and look at Hakkai. Instead, he continued to lay still, his breathing slow and steady; as if he was asleep. A part of Gojyo hoped that if Hakkai thought he really was out of it, maybe the healer would continue to touch him.

It was such an about-face for the converted youkai. Gojyo usually had to practically move mountains to get the other man to allow anyone, including Gojyo himself (especially Gojyo himself), to touch him except in an emergency. Of course, the red head realized, heart sinking, that in a way, this was an emergency. This was the closest yet that he had come to dying on this field trip from hell, and since he was the person that Hakkai was closest to, it stood to reason that the brunette might want some tactile assurance that Gojyo was still alive and breathing.

Damn, he hated logic.

There was nothing special about Hakkai’s sudden urge to reach out and touch him. Just an awkward attempt to reassure himself that his best friend was still alive and kicking after the beating he’d taken. That he was still breathing, anyway, after nearly kicking the bucket. Nothing more.

Gojyo nearly stopped breathing when those cool fingers left his chest and moved into his hair. Hakkai never touched his hair. Ever. Those strong, beautiful fingers that he’d admired since he had saved the bleeding stranger on the road all those years ago, were threading through his long, red hair in a strangely intimate gesture. It was all he could do to continue to keep his breathing even, and not let on that he was really awake.

“Yare yare, Gojyo,” breathed Hakkai, voice trembling slightly. “So very troublesome.”

Gojyo was not thrilled at the way the converted youkai said those words. About to open his eyes, another fleeting touch froze him. It was the brush of lips against his forehead, slightly warm, a bit chapped, and utterly masculine. That soft, momentary touch held the hanyou still, not even daring to breath. Had he hallucinated that?

“But that’s the way you are, and I wouldn’t change anything about you,” said the healer, his voice still a barely-heard whisper. “You wouldn’t be Gojyo, otherwise.”

Now Gojyo knew he was either dreaming or hallucinating. Then he heard the springs of the bed he was laying on squeak as Hakkai moved. Suddenly, there was a soft pressure as those same lips that had brushed his forehead now kissed him chastely on his own lips.

Stunned, the kappa lay still for a moment, before daring to open his eyes, sure that when he did, Hakkai would disappear like the dream he must be. But no, the converted youkai healer was right there, just beginning to pull back from the soft kiss. He saw green eyes catch sight of him, widening in shock and surprise as a flush began to creep up into Hakkai’s face. Knowing his best friend as well as he did, Gojyo’s hand shot out and grabbed the black sleeve of his tunic to keep him from fleeing.

“Holy shit, Hakkai, did you just kiss me?”