Sonic Series Fan Fiction ❯ The Epic ❯ The NetNavis Saga ( Chapter 10 )

THE EPIC

HAMMER AND SICKLE STUDIOS PRESENTS AN EPIC EDITED BY VOLKOV "INTERACTIVE STORY!!!" STARRING A TON OF RANDOM PEOPLE WRITTEN BY LORD FEAR HAKU SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG GRAND MASTER SHOMA SONICMON THE VIEW2FUL AND VOLKOV WRITTEN ON THE TRIPLE PEEPS FORUM IMAGINED BY LORD FEAR AND EDITED BY GREG "VOLKOV" PARAUBEK

Wow! Ten sagas! TEN! Wooo! Ok, that's enough of that. Read and review. Please! I'm begging you!

Disclaimer: Any characters not owned by, but not limited to, Sega, Square Enix, Nintendo, Namco, Capcom, Westwood, or any other company were created by us (the forum users) and cannot be used without our express permission. This story is joint property of all the people who wrote anything in it, and the Triple Peeps, who own the forum where this was placed. You steal, you suffer the consequences. You've been warned. Now read and enjoy!

INTERACTIVE STORY!!!

The NetNavis Saga

[The next day; something's not right here...]

Sonic: (yawns) Hey! I feel completely refreshed! And...I'm in a cybernetic blue jumpsuit?

Bridget: Sonic! We're not in the same place!

Dizzy: We're in a different world!

Sonic: Not again!!

[He looks up to see a glass screen, and sees Tails's face.]

Sonic: TAILS!!

Tails: Huh? What is it, Sonic.exe?

Sonic.exe: WHAT!? What in the flaming hell are you talking about?

Tails: You were a new one, so I thought my other NetNavis Bridget.exe and Dizzy.exe explained to you what happened.

Sonic.exe: NETNAVIS!? (thinking) Oh god, we're in the Megaman Battle Network universe!

Lord Fear.exe: Why am I here?

Eggman.exe: we were sucked in here…

Pink Big.exe: Froggy?

[Lord Fear.exe and Eggman.exe kill Pink Big.exe.]

PINK BIG DELETED

Shadow.exe: (wearing a black leather trench coat, complete with sunglasses) Damnit! Not again!

Knuckles.exe: (in Gutsman.exe outfit) Again? What do you mean?

Shadow.exe: Well...

[Long explanation later...]

Knuckles.exe: (wide eyed) HOLY SHIT!!!

Shadow.exe: Exactly

Eggman.exe: Oh my god! I ACTUALLY LOOK LIKE AN EGG!!! Cool!

Bowser.exe: (looking like a large turtle but not overly freaky like Giga Bowser) I'm huge!

Il Palazzo.exe: (black skintight suit with his silver hair) I can't feel my legs!

Eggman.exe: You have none!!

Il Palazzo.exe: I see...

[Meanwhile in the Cyber Station Square.]

Sonic.exe: How did we become NetNavis?

Bridget.exe: (blue female bodysuit) Dunno.

Dizzy.exe: (tight leather) The random insanity machine again?

Tails.exe: Probably.

Sonic.exe: Hi Tails. TAILS!?

Tails: What?

Tails.exe: If you're confused, Sonic, then let me explain: I am the Navi representation of your friend, Tails.

Tails: Yeah, Sonic.exe!

Sonic.exe: I am confused...

Shadow: HEY! ASS!!!

Shadow.exe: (looking around) What the- HELL?!

Knuckles: Yep, they're lost too...

Shadow.exe: WHO ARE YOU?!

Shadow: I'm the real Shadow!

Shadow.exe: And I'm navi-Shadow!

Knuckles: THEY KNOW TOO MUCH! DELETE!

Knuckles.exe: (deleted) FUCK!!!

Sonic.exe: Well, since we're Navis...how do we get around?

Tails.exe: Moving your legs.

[Sonic.exe selects a Cannon chip, and fires it at Tails.exe.]

Tails.exe: OW! I lost 40 HP!

Sonic.exe: Wait a minute...where's the other two?

[A NetBattle is occurring.]

Megatron.exe: You are quite the competitors. I can take both of you on at the same time! HAHAHA--Huh?

[Megatron.exe didn't see Bridget.exe's Yo-Yo3 chip hit him three consecutive times, as well as adding Dizzy.exe's IceTower chip to the fray.]

Megatron.exe: (high squeaky voice) ALRIGHT! I FORFEIT!

Knuckles.exe Ver. 2: Now that I'm in this crazy form, you, good sir, will get your femme ass kicked!

Bridget.exe: Then bring it!!

[And...]

Farah.exe: EGGMAN!!!

[Eggman.exe gets the Shotgun Chip out and fires at Farah.exe. She loses 100 HP.]

Farah.exe: Curse you Eggman!

Eggman.exe: Whatever.

Shadow.exe: WHY GOD?! WHY?!

Shadow: Cause...

Shadow.exe: THAT'S NOT THE ANSWER I NEED!!!

Shadow: Tough shi- (punch) OW! Knuckles!

Knuckles: (acting innocent) What? It...er...wasn't me?

Knuckles.exe V2: Nope! It was him! I saw him! He's a bloody liar!

Knuckles: Curses!

[Meanwhile, Sonic is running all over cyberspace in a blind speed.]

Sonic.exe: WEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! (runs into a digital tree) Ow... (plop)

Quickman.exe: You think you're so fast, don't you?

Sonic.exe: Think? I KNOWS I AM!

Quickman.exe: Then I challenge you to a race around the cyberworld! Meet me at Cyber Station Square in 20 minutes! A Navi will raise a checkered flag!

Sonic.exe: You're on!

[20 minutes later and Cyber Station Square...]

Sonic.exe: Shadow.exe? What are you doing here?

Shadow.exe: I have nothing better to do and I need to have you all eat dirt.

Quickman.exe: You'll be eating MY dirt in a few seconds!

Eggman.exe: (raising checkered flag) REEEEADY?! GO!!!

[Almost as abruptly as a random explosion, a mysterious figure nearly hacks the three in half. Well, two, since Quickman.exe just got spliced.]

Shadow.exe: (gasp) WHAT?! BUT IT CAN'T BE!!!

Sonic.exe: But it is! (another gasp)

Sephiroth.exe: (looking up) You'll pay for this, Aeris! Putting my brain in a computer...I just wanna know: How do we get out of this system!?

Sonic.exe: Beats the hell out of me!

Shadow.exe: I WANT OUT!!!

Shadow.exe: This is gonna take a while...

Sonic.exe: (looks around) Where'd Sephiroth go?

Sephiroth.exe: (fighting against Quickman.exe) I hope you enjoy pain. You're going to get a truckload in a thimble.

Quickman.exe: (puzzled) What? (slashed in half)

Eggman.exe: I've got it!

Lord Fear.exe: Huh?

Eggman.exe: We just here and don't do anything.

Bowser.exe: Why?

Eggman.exe: So that we can get out of here!

Il Palazzo.exe: Might as well….

Haku.Exe: (basically looks like Haku; notices lord fear; salutes) Sir, I have a message from Big.Exe! He says, "The MS Blaster Worm will destroy us all! Oh, and there in E-mails from people you don't know! HJA!" Not too bright, is he?

[Sephiroth.exe comes in with Big.exe and Pink Big.exe impaled on his sword.]

Sephiroth.exe: Why DO they keep coming back?

Eggman: Because they like to get killed.

Il Palazzo.exe: They must.

Haku: (shrugs) Anyways, I have some songs! Who wants ta listen to 'im? (doesn't wait for answers) Okay! (grabs karaoke machine)

Shadow.exe: Waitaminute...BLASTER WORM?! THEY STOLE MY VIRUS! THOSE ASSHATS!!!

Sonic.exe: What's it do, anyway?

[Suddenly, a Yu-Gi-Oh Giant Worm Beast appears.]

Shadow: Well, to be honest, it creates "Yu-Gi-Oh!" monsters out of nowhere.

Sephiroth: (looking with a sarcastic look) You're...kidding?

[More "Yu-Gi-Oh!" creatures appear, like the Blue Eyes Ultimate Dragon, Exodia (which accidentally lands on Big who was somehow alive), Magician of Black Chaos, and (for another random reason) Manga Yugi.]

Amy.exe: (wearing Roll.exe outfit) Not you again! HAMMER TIME!!!

Manga Yugi: (gets pegged in the crotch again by Amy.exe's hammer, but doesn't flinch) HA! I have learned from that mistake! Behold my genius!

[Manga Yugi drops his pants (Shadow.exe: AGH!!! MY VIRGIN EYES!!!), and it turns out his...thing is actually made of metal.]

Sephiroth: You replaced your jewels with metal ones?! Where the fuck is your honor?!

Manga Yugi: (still half naked (Knuckles.exe: GET THEM OUT OF MY HEAD!!!)) I left it at home! YOU WILL ALL PERISH AT THE HANDS OF- (SMASH!!!)

[Before Manga Yugi could finish, Amy.exe smashes Manga Yugi over the head with her Piko Piko Hammer.]

Amy.exe: IN YO FACE!

Eggman.exe: (out of nowhere) Literally!

Lord Fear.exe (dressed as Bass.exe): Time to hunt some Ishtars!

Il Palazzo.exe: I'm going off to invade the Cyber City of F.

Bowser.exe: I'm going to invade The Cyber Mushroom Kingdom.

Eggman.exe: I'm going to invade Cyber Station Square and I'm going to build Cyber Eggman Land over it.

Manga Yugi: (giant red mark on face) THE BURNING!!!

Knuckles.exe: (punching the daylights and nightlights out of Manga Yugi) Make ME set on fire, WILL YOU?!

Shadow.exe: (stepping on face of Manga Yugi) RAIN SCALPLE THIS, ASSHOLE!!!

Tails.exe: (poking Manga Yugi's eyes) Rock, paper, SCISSORS!!! (pokes)

Rouge.exe: Give me back my jewel! The one you encased me in!!

Manga Yugi.exe: Whatever you say! CRYSTALLIZATION BATTLE CHIP IN!

[Rouge.exe is crystallized once again.]

Knuckles.exe: Dumb bitch!

Sol.exe: It's time to kick some Knuckles ass! FLAME SWORD BATTLE CHIP IN!

Ky.exe: Not so fast! ELEC SWORD BATTLE CHIP IN!

[The two now duke it out.]

Bridget.exe: Let's go Sonic! YO-YO3 BATTLE CHIP IN!

[Ensnares Sonic.exe.]

Sonic.exe: Why are you taking me in?

Dizzy.exe: We heard you're worth a lot, Sonic. The reward money might just help the Jellyfish Pirates out!

Samus.exe: Leave the hedgehog alone. He's with me! (points her arm cannon) MISSILE BATTLE CHIP IN!

Eggman.exe: This should be good.

Zeeky H. Bomb.exe: (pops in unexpectedly) ZEEKY BOOGY DOOG CHIP IN!!!

[Large nuclear explosion later...]

Shadow.exe: (hair's messed up) Oh, that's IT! NOBODY! MESSES! WITH THE DEW!!! HYPER SHADOW CHIP IN!!!

[Super Saiyan style transfiguration later...]

Sonic.exe: What the crap?

Somewhere in a distant corner of the universe in the real world…]

Unicron: It's time to place the final pieces of the puzzle so I, Unicron, will be supreme ruler of the entire universe!

[Back to our heroes…]

Lord Fear.exe: Medafighters.exe, Ready, RoBattle!

[Medabots music.]

Shadow.exe: Eat this! (kicks the 'bomb' out of the world) The hell?

[The program of "Zeeky Boogy Doog" goes flying into space, and lands into Unicron.]

Unicron: The fu--

[Unicron explodes.]

GMS: Well, that solves our Unicron problem.

Eggman.exe: We had a Unicron problem?

[Oh right. Wasn't there another battle brewing?]

Samus.exe: HYPER BEAM BATTLE CHIP IN!

Sonic.exe: SONIC WIND BATTLE CHIP IN!

[Large gusty explosion]

Bridget.exe: YO-YO3 BATTLE CHIP IN!

Dizzy.exe: IMPERIAL RAY BATTLE CHIP IN!

[Large swinging explosion.]

Eggman.exe: MY TRIPLE PEEPS PROGRAM ADVANCE ACTIVATE!

[Eggman.exe, Bowser.exe, and Il Palazzo.exe all man their best assets (guns, flames, and a combination of guns and magic) at the four of them; you guessed it: large giant explosion where the four of them are deleted.]

All four of them: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-(deleted)

Eggman.exe: Oops.

Il Palazzo.exe: Methinks we went a little too far...

Il Palazzo.exe: Hmm…if we delete ourselves we might return to the real world.

Eggman.exe: Might as well give it a shot…

Bowser.exe: There isn't anything better to do.

Lord Fear.exe: Let's do it!

[The four delete themselves and return to the real world.]

Eggman: We're free at last!

[In another part of the universe.]

Unicron: I fooled everyone by being destroyed…but I'm still alive! (Insert dramatic music)

Mewtwo: (appears so abruptly that he should of landed in with a parachute, blasts Unicron with a Shadow Ball, andtalking with psychic powers (like always)) You will not devour this planet, Unicron! That's mine for the manipulating!

Unicron: (recovering from Shadow Ball attack) STFU, you REJECT EXPERIMENT!!!

Mewtwo: REJECT THIS!!! (applies pain to Unicron's system)

Shadow: I'M- (gets blasted away by stray Shadow Ball attack) BOOOOOOOOOOored....

END OF THE NETNAVIS SAGA!

{Ed. Note: Weirder and weirder. Well, I'm off to play Hitman Contracts with my friend, Mr. 47. Damn awesome game! Buy it! NOW!}

Coming Soon: Another Saga maybe?