Sonic Series Fan Fiction ❯ The Epic ❯ The Team Reloaded Saga ( Chapter 15 )

THE EPIC

HAMMER AND SICKLE STUDIOS PRESENTS AN EPIC EDITED BY VOLKOV "INTERACTIVE STORY!!!" STARRING A TON OF RANDOM PEOPLE WRITTEN BY LORD FEAR HAKU SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG GRAND MASTER SHOMA SONICMON THE VIEW2FUL AND VOLKOV WRITTEN ON THE TRIPLE PEEPS FORUM IMAGINED BY LORD FEAR AND EDITED BY GREG "VOLKOV" PARAUBEK

Number 15…not bad at all. Keep reading and reviewing.

Disclaimer: Any characters not owned by, but not limited to, Sega, Square Enix, Nintendo, Namco, Capcom, Westwood, or any other company were created by us (the forum users) and cannot be used without our express permission. This story is joint property of all the people who wrote anything in it, and the Triple Peeps, who own the forum where this was placed. You steal, you suffer the consequences. You've been warned. Now read and enjoy!

INTERACTIVE STORY!!!

The Team Reloaded Saga

[Let's check on Team Rose...]

Amy: Well, this seems familiar...

Cream: (playing jacks with Cheese) What is?

Cheese: (eats jacks) Chao!

Amy: (points at all the stuff heading their way) That...

[A HUGE EXPLOSION!!! Then a plot change to-]

Cloud: OH MY GOD!!! MY HAIR'S LOOSING ITS SHAPE!!! NEED MORE HAIR GEL!!!

Sephiroth: The dangers of Egg Yolk...part one...

Aeris: (constantly slipping in yolk) I'm an ice skater! WEE!!! (slip…SMASH!!!)

[And Team Dark, recently recovering from the horrid event that nearly wiped them off the face of the earth (or the frying pan, whichever...), gather themselves and go forth to Eggman's Pyramid Base]

Tails: (really not feeling good) When my bones reform, I'm going to KILL YOU, Shadow...

Shadow: (somehow the only fully recovered one) Now, now, Tails! Let's not get angry at something that was entirely SONIC'S fault! (pats Tails' head)

Sonic: (fairly beaten up; angry) THAT WAS EGGMAN'S DOINGS, YOU MORON!!! WHY I 'OTTAH-

Knuckles: (also beaten up; holding Exodia toy) GO EXODIA!!! (fires plastic thing again)

Shadow: (ignoring Sonic's various cursing from the plastic blast hitting his eye) The point is there's nothing to fear! Because I'm awesome! Moving on...

? 1-100,000: NOT SO FAST!!!

Rouge: (not as beaten up) Ugh... not again...

[Meanwhile, Team Jellyfish wanders around until they hit a large chasm]

May: How do we get across?

Dizzy: Doesn't that formation above the gap look obtainable?

Bridget: It does! And I know how I'll get us across!

[He swings his yo-yo to the formation, which locks into place very nicely. He tugs it a few times, and signals the girls to hold on to him; they jump and make it to the other side]

Bridget: Well, that was easy.

[Team Death appear behind them.]

Sephiroth: Dammit.

Aeris: I'll get them! HOLY!

[The traitor spell Holy makes the area explode.]

Eggman: What the fuck?

Cloud: (hair is on fire) How the FUCK did that happen?!

Aeris: MY SPELLS ARE BEING MEAN TO ME AGAIN!!!

Sephiroth: (shaking head in shame) I hate my life...

[Using the teleportation device within Eggman's fortress, Team Dark warps themselves aboard whatever the hell that swordfish airship thing is.]

Sonic: How did we get here so quickly? And on another note, why are we dressed like various movie characters?

Shadow: (dressed in Neo's trench coat and sunglasses) That's not important right now! We need to locate the entrance to this thing!

Omega: (now looking like R2D2; various beeps)

Tails: (dressed like the Disney Robin Hood (the fox one); pointing an arrow) LOOK! OVER THERE!

[It turns out that ? 1-1000 have also mysteriously teleported themselves aboard. As if you didn't know...]

Knuckles: (in a frilly pink tutu; hiding) GAH! DON'T LOOK AT ME!!!

Shadow: (taking out guns from trench coat) Alright guys, let's KICK SOME ASS!!!

Tails: (readies bow and arrow, in the wrong way) GO TIME!!!

Rouge: (dressed in a Kimono like one of those Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon girls) HAI!!!

Knuckles: (dancing in) I feel pretty! Oh so pre- AGH!!! (hides again)

Sonic: Wait...why am I the only one NOT dressed?!

Eggman: Who knows?

Sonic: EH?!

[Team Egg Fear raise their hands and shout…]:

Eggman: EGG BOMB!

Sturm: METEOR STRIKE!

Bowser: FIRE CANNON!

Il Palazzo: THUNDER STRIKE!

Lord Fear: INSANITY STRIKE!

Unicron: SPIKE CANNON!

[A giant egg, a meteor, flames, thunder, spikes, and a wave of insanity head towards Team Dark.]

Team Dark: Attack.

Giga Bowser: (leaps in) THOU SHALT NOT BE GODLIKE!!! I STRIKE THEE FROM THE RECORDS!!! (strikes those using god powers from the records)

Shadow: (blank) What?

[On Pop Star…]

Eggman: Ha! He fell for the old "Strike thee from the record"!

Lord Fear: Sure did.

Il Palazzo: So why are we here?

Eggman: We can go to the Fountain of Dreams, and each get one wish.

Sturm: Cool.

Unicron: We will have our revenge.

Bowser (angry): I WILL GET RID OF THAT FAKER!

Eggman: But that's you.

Bowser: HE WILL DIE, I'M THE ONLY BOWSER AROUND HERE AND I'M THE ONLY GIGA BOWSER!

[Sonic's Team just happened to pass by where Aeris destroyed Team Jellyfish.]

Sonic: Hey! You guys okay?

Bridget: Sonic...sorry...

Dizzy: (weakened) Sephiroth...he came, and...decimated us...

Knuckles: Ouch.

Shadow: Not good.

Omega: Targets sighted!

Rouge: Which ones?

Omega: Gedo High characters heading our way.

[Akira, Edge, and Gan walk by…]

Edge: Good day.

Gan: See you later.

Knuckles: Hey! They're beating us to Eggman!

Akira: Huh?

Sonic: He's evil!!

Akira: Of course not! He's a kind and good person!

Edge: (going along with Akira) Of course!

Tails and Knuckles: You're all idiots!

[EXPLOSION!! The Egg Carrier appears...]

Eggman: We're back!

Lord Fear: And this time, it's winner take all!

Il Palazzo: Damn straight!

Sturm: We're here to kick some ass!

Bowser: And chew bubble gum!

Unicron: But we're all out of bubble gum!

Eggman: Who took the gum?

Big: Froggy?

[Unicron grabs Big and throws him down to where Team Dark and the others are.]

Knuckles: OMG!! It's the furry apocalypse! (runs off)WOMEN AND ECHIDNAS FIRST!!

Tails: Are you sure 'echidnas' are the plural for one echidna?

Sonic: (helping up the other team) Tails, now is not the time!

Necro: I will stop it!! (pulls out bow and arrow; fires energy blasts to Big meteor; Big meteor explodes with guts and fur flying everywhere)

Shadow: EEWW!! Liver on my poof!

Necro: Oops...

Dizzy: It's alright. You're a good kid.

Gan: I heard that, right?

(Turn around to see Team Xploiter.)

Daigo: SEE!? Only EGGMAN could fire something that vicious down on us!

Farah: Yeah!

Space Pirate X: True.

Akira: No! Eggman is a good person!

(While Akira is ranting, Teams Dark and Jellyfish sneak away.)

[Meanwhile…]

Megaman: (speed) How much farther?

Gutsman: (power) Only a few meters left!

Roll: (fly) Sweet!

[They fall off a cliff.]

All of them: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA--(splash)

Eggman: Damnit! Let's just do what we planned to do in the first place!

Unicron: VERY WELL!!! LET US PREPARE OUR...

All Villains: COFFEE SHOP!!!

Heroes: [in unison] NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO- wha?!

Eggman: You see, with all the coffee shops available in our respective worlds, we thought we should band together and beat that fuggin' Starbucks company to a pulp!!!

Shadow: We were trying to stop you from making a coffee shop?! [flipping mad]

Sephiroth: (long angry stare) I thought I was wasting my time... but I didn't know how much until now...

[Eggman, Lord Fear, Sturm, Il Palazzo, Bowser and Unicron speed off in different directions and go and build Coffee Shops in their plan to conquer the Coffee Shop chain.]

Sonic: This was a waste of OUR time.

Shadow: Look at the bright side, at least Sonic Heroes is now called Shadow Heroes.

Sonic: What?

Tails: It's true! SEGA found out that Shadow is way better then you and agreed to put Shadow as the main character of every single Sonic game in history.

Sonic: Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

Shadow: SHUT UP FAKER FOR GODS SAKE!!

[And so, all went well in the lives of- Wait, what happened with the 1000?!]

Shadow clone 23: (looking around) Wait...where'd they go?!

Shadow clone 410: I dunno! But that doesn't matter.

Shadow clone 3: Why?

Shadow clone 410: We're set to self destruct in...now.

Shadow clone 96: Fuck...

[The Shadow clones all explode violently.]

Eggman: (randomly) TOASTAAAAAAAY!!!

END OF THE TEAM RELOADED SAGA!

{Ed. Note: So…any guesses as to what inspired the title here? No? You suck.}

Coming Soon: More Insanity