Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ Forgotten Memories ❯ Drowning in Memories ( Chapter 9 )

Title: Forgotten Memories

Author: Sardius

Category: Angst/Romance

Warnings: PG-13

Pairings: Ken/Aya and Yohji/Aya

Disclaimer: I don't own Weiss Kreuz otherwise I won't be sitting here sharing with you my entertaining stories. O.o; *sweatdrops*

Author's Note: My apologies! This was a late post and mainly because I was lazy and also avoiding of wrapping this up. Hee. Yeah I'm terrible. Yohji is such an ass in this chapter but he started off as the evil Yohji so that cannot be helped right? *grin* Phew! This is so hard to write. Damn! Why did I even started writing this in the first place???!!! *grumbles*

Anyway enjoy the new post….think I'll hv to fix some grammar thing after but er….hp its okay for now. Thanks for all the wonderful review everyone! I love you all!~

OH! And special thanks to Tmelange for pointing out to me…LOL…..this is so embarrassing, apparently I spelt Weiss Kreuz wrong in my disclaimer!!! (I haven't fixed it yet mind you) Never use copy and paste I tell you!!! I own you one dear! You're the best!

//Character's thoughts//

Chapter Nine: Drowning in Memories

I couldn't face them. Not now. Not ever. Not after I know that deep inside Ran truly does love me and all I could do is watch him go. I won't let him. I won't let him do this to us. Hidaka is not going to get in our way.

Ever.

I had been wandering around the streets for God knows how long. All I could do was to think back on what Ran had said to me before left.

// "…because Ken needs me…so I have to do this." //

Fuck that! I need him too. Has he even considered that maybe I need him as well. To see his beautiful eyes every morning when I wake up. To see those lips curled up in a sweet smile, knowing they are just for me. All these things I wanted to hold so closely in my heart and he gives them back to someone else!

I bumped into some stranger as they mumbled 'jerk' behind me but I couldn't care less who it is. All I could think of is rushing back to the Koneko and strangle Ken with my wire. Damn him. Ran belongs to me. I will get him back even if I have to kill myself. I will speak some sense into Ran even if he wants me to shut the fuck up.

I began to storm back to the shop as only one-thought crosses my mind.

// I plan to win Hidaka. I never lose. //

* * * * * * * *

// Have I done the right thing? //

I can't back out now. But the look on Yohji's face had being terrifying. He should have understand. Why couldn't he just leave it alone? I have chosen Ken and I know we can work things out. I know we can.

But why does Yohji's voice keep repeating in my head?

// "Ran! You can't do this to yourself. You don't even love him! I won't let you do this!" //

God! Why is he making it so hard? I…I can't even think straight at the moment. What if? What if Yohji couldn't handle it? I shook my head. Of course he can handle it. He…he just needs some time to think things through right. Then…then he'll forget all this had happen and everything would be back to normal again. I go back to Ken as I use to before my accident and Yohji….Yohji would…..

// You don't even love him! //

Shut up! Please! Leave me alone! Why can't you just get out of my head? Why would Yohji want someone like me? I mean I kind of remember we use to never get along and we always tend to fight all the time and wasn't it something about him that always makes me upset? We…we shouldn't really be together…I mean after all…me and Ken…we use to be lovers…and Ken has done so much for me, I can't just leave him alone like that.

// But you don't love him. //

I can! I can learn to love him again. I just needed some time. Ken is really a nice person and he always tries to take care of me…why couldn't I… love him? He's so sweet and endearing and he said he would never hurt me. I should be happy with Ken. I should be. Shouldn't I?

// Whom do you love the most? //

I…I don't know….

// Don't lie //

It's….

… Yohji.

I love Yohji the most.

* * * * * * * *

"Ran."

[Silence]

"Ran!"

"Nani?" I finally got Ran's attention after I have realized he have zoomed out for the past half hour. Ran looked at me dazedly and began clearing the table, placing the plates in the sink. I continue to look at him from the corner of my eye, wondering what had happened outside. Ever since Yohji had come into the room, Ran had all but frozen on the spot and started trembling beside me. I wanted to rush out there as well when he started chasing after Yohji onto the street but instinct told me that it was not a good idea.

So instead I observed from the balcony.

And watched the commotion outside.

I saw Ran trying to stop Yohji from getting into his Seven. The blonde had pushed Ran away and I could tell they were both yelling at each other. I longed to know what they were saying when suddenly I saw the blonde grabbing onto Ran as he struggled. I wanted to go down there and tell that playboy to back off when suddenly the phone ran.

Omi had call to let us know he will be back later in the day. By the time I had finished talking to him, Ran had came back. His amethyst eyes were teary red, as if he had being crying. I wanted to ask him what was wrong but he only smiled and continued to eat his breakfast.

And had not spoken to me since then.

"Hey you okay? You have being silent for the past half hour." I got up and wrapped my arms around his waist from behind as I buried my face along his crimson hair. Ran froze but his body slowly relaxed against me as I continued holding him tight, making sure that I was not dreaming, that I will never let him go.

"Arigatou Ran." I whispered along his ear. He shivered and began washing the rest of he dishes in the sink. I smiled remembering this morning the words he said to me.

// Ken…I…I wanted us to start over again. //

Those words kept repeating in my head, as if I was still in my dream. Ran had decided to start our relationship again. I couldn't believe the joy of hearing these words. I have thought I was the luckiest man on earth to be given a chance with Aya again. Even though they may not be the same person but part of me knows that deep down inside Aya still exists and one day he will truly remember us. And then no one, no one would ever be able to break us apart again.

// Not even Yohji. //

I tightened my arms around him and slowly turned him around to face me. His eyes were still slightly red as I gently brushed my fingers along his crimson bangs sliding my fingers down his soft pale cheek. Ran stood there starring at me, confusion settles in his eyes as I leaned up and place my lips softly against his. He gasped and flinches, but I hold onto him tightly with my arms lending him strength.

We continued being in each other embrace as I kissed him more forcefully. I gently coaxed Ran to open his lips to mine, as I traced my tongue along his bottom lips, urging him to let me in. His lips slowly opened to mine and I found myself sharing that intense heat and sweetness as I dipped my tongue inside and caress him gently.

"Ran…" I moaned. God! How I needed him so much. How I missed this. I wanted us to be together like this forever. No one is ever going to separate us. Ran's knees slightly began to give way as he grabbed onto me around the shoulder. I took the opportunity to slide my hands inside his sweater and felt his warm smooth skin against mine.

// I will never let you go. //

I broke the kiss out of necessity to allow more air into our lungs as I looked into Ran's eyes showing a mist of emotions swirling around in his amethysts orbs. He looks so beautiful above me with his face slightly flushed, his lips swollen from our intense kiss and his crimson locks disheveled. I smiled as I pulled him against me and started to kiss him again.

Then Ran broke off and backed away from me.

"Ken…stop."

I looked confusingly into his eyes…was there a sense of fear lingering in them? "What's wrong Ran?" I wanted to figure out what was going on. Maybe I was moving too fast, after all we had only got back together since this morning and maybe Ran was afraid of this physical closeness so soon.

"It's okay." I gathered him up in my arms again. I just never want to let him go. "I won't ever hurt you Ran. I promise." I gently laced my fingers with his to calm him down when he just shook his head and stepped away from me.

// Ran? //

"What is wrong Ran? Did I….did I do something wrong?" I began to panic. Maybe Ran doesn't want me anymore…did he realized he made the wrong choice? Is he going to leave me? Why won't he let me get close to him?

"Ken…I…I just wanted to have some more space."

"What do you mean? Didn't you want us to be together again?" I whispered sadly.

"No!" Ran's eyes widened and I was forced to stare up at the sudden sharpness of his voice. "I…." He looks away. "I...just needed some more time to get use to this." Then he turns around and began to walk down towards the shop. "I should get started on the arrangements anyway."

I know he is hiding something. Why is he avoiding my question? Is it…

// Could it possibly be? //

"What did he say to you?" I blurted. I wanted to know what had happened to Ran when he ran after Yohji. Is there something I should have known?

Ran stops before his hand touched the doorknob and froze. Goddamn it! What is going on? I spun him around so that he could face me, his eyes widened in fear as I flinched to know I was the one that inflicted him to feel this way.

"What did Yohji say to you? What are you hiding from me Ran?" I pleaded. Why is he looking so sad? What is he so afraid of that he doesn't want me to know? Did Yohji force him to do something he doesn't want to do? I will kill that bastard if he ever hurts Ran.

Ran continued to keep starring at me, unable to come up with any explanations to my questioning. "Damn it Ran! Answer me!" I shook him by the shoulders as I kept asking him to tell me what was wrong.

"Because he doesn't fucking love you."

Ran and me looked up at the same time to see Yohji standing by the doorway looking extremely pissed off. "What the fuck are you saying Kudou?" I snarled. "What have you said to Ran? I swear if you hurt him I'll…."

"I said he doesn't fucking love you!"

"Yohji! Stop!"

Ran rushed over and began to pull Yohji out of the room urging him to shut up. The blonde however did not back away except he pushed Ran behind him and came up towards me.

"No Yohji! Please don't!"

But Yohji kept ignoring the redhead. "Look Ken. Ran doesn't even love you. Don't you get it? He only chooses you because he thought you couldn't handle it. Don't you realize that you can't turn back time! Things changed Hidaka. He's not Aya anymore for Christ sake!"

// What does he mean? What is he talking about? //

"Shut up! Shut up! Just shut the fuck up!" I screamed. How could he? This can't be true! Ran loves me. He loves me. That's why he chooses me instead of Kudou. He couldn't have possibly done this just out of obligations. He wouldn't! He wouldn't!!!

"Yohji please…don't say anymore." Ran pleaded. I couldn't even see anything properly. Everything was blurry and all I could hear was Yohji's voice that kept repeating in my head…

// Ran doesn't love you. //

No he's wrong! It isn't true!

"Ran? It's not true isn't it? He's lying right? Tell me this is not true. You love me don't you?"

Ran looked at me with his amethyst eyes, guilt and sadness lingered in them as my eyes widened in disbelief.

And I knew.

He didn't need to say. I already know the truth. I want to die. I want to scream. I just want to get away from here. How could he do this to me? Why doesn't he love me? Why? I didn't do anything wrong. Why wouldn't….

"Ken…. please listen to me."

"No! Don't touch me!" I practically shouted at him. "How could you? Why did you lie to me? I don't want your god damn pity!" I pushed him aside and flung the door opened, running out onto the chilly street. I distantly heard someone screaming for me to stop but all I wanted to do was to get away from everyone and everything…when suddenly…

BEEP~~!!!!!!

I turned around just in time to see Ran collapsed onto the road as a car hit him.

"RAN!"

// Oh God! Please be all right. //

I ran to him as fear rushed throughout my body. A thousand thoughts filtered through my head as I rushed over to where he was laid down and gathered him up in my arms. He was so cold; his body was shaking badly, his eyes were cloudy mists as he tried to focus them upon me.

Shit. He's having a concussion.

"Shhh….I'm so sorry Ran…it's okay. I got you. I'll take you to the hospital soon. Just stay awake love. Don't close your eyes."

I was practically shaking in fear as I called the ambulance. I tried to talk to him, forcing him to keep opening his eyes and to see if I can get any response out of him but all he did was looked at me strangely and utter a single word that made my heart stop.

" Ken?" he whispered.

I cradled Ran in my arms as a cold shiver swept through my body.

// Aya? //

* * * * * * *

TBC~~~~

I'm hoping I won't get kill after writing this chapter. If you are confuse I was kinda hinting Ran got his memories back…which means Aya is back in the next chapter! Woo! Ice prince is back! YAY! Hmmm…I think the most is two more chapters to go! Then I'll hv my first finished fic. *laughs* How bad am I? Thanks for sticking around…stay with me k for the last two chapters and I hp it won't be a disappointment to many others. *Wicked smile* Ja ne~