Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ With my eyes wide open ❯ De Profundis ( Chapter 1 )

Title: "With my eyes wide open"

Author: Lilla.

Category: Angst/ AU.

Warnings: PG13 (for now).

Pairings: YxR and SxA

Disclaimer: Wow official looking…

I own nothing!!! BBWWAHHH Please can I borrow them? I promise I won't ruin them much…

Author's Note: Some POVs. Spoilers for "An Assassin and a White Shaman". This is very much of an AU I won't follow the original timeline too much, be prepared for a not so nice Aya-chan. Oh nearly forgot Aya is Ran and Aya-chan is Aya, OK? Quite easy actually!

OK after that sort of cliffhanger at the end of the prologue let's go and see what happened right? Yes as if anyone would be interested…

Also many thanks to Sardius without whom this fic would never have got written! Go and read her wonderful fics!

Character's Thoughts

'Mind-speech'

(Character's POV)

**************** Change of POV

Chapter One: De Profundis.

(Ran)

Aya… watch out Aya… Someone is looking at us I can almost feel their presence, malignant, waiting to strike.

What am I thinking? Why do I feel that way?

White… noise… fire… pain…

Am I dead?

'Taste the guilt of surviving…feel it, breathe it'

Why… what's happening? Otousan… something happened to him and Okaasan, something horrid.

'You didn't help them and now they are dead.'

I… I couldn't I had to protect Aya… I did that! I succeeded! She's safe!

'You think so? Then you'd better think again. But for your intervention your dear imouto wouldn't be the broken doll she probably is now. Her body is alive but completely ruined. You failed utterly. But then failing is the only thing you know how to do, isn't it?'

No! No it's not true! Aya where are you! Aya I will protect you! They won't take you away from me too!

Pain so much pain… Aya, it's dark in here…

*********************

(Aya)

Ran-nii help me!

White… noise… fire… pain… nothing…

Am I dead?

'Taste the guilt of surviving…feel it, breathe it'

What is this voice in my head? Why should I think about surviving… everything's all right. Now I'll wake up and mother will have my breakfast ready with the French croissants I like so much.

No I already woke up… what's going on I feel as if I were floating, my senses dulled, gone.

The air is stale. Must open the window…

I can see the sunlight through my closed eyelids.

I opened my eyes to gaze on up at the sun high in the sky above me white mortar dust falling down all around me. Something red caught the edge of my eye, something that looked suspiciously like blood or my brother's hair. Something that was slowly coming closer and closer into my vision as I could make out my brother's bloody face while his body slowly crumpled on top of me. His face landing almost on top of mine, obscuring my vision. All I could see was red… red hair… red blood.

A red rivulet fell from his hair and ended up on my cheek… I screamed and then as I felt it move down to my neck I screamed again. It was then that I realised I was pinned to the ground by my brother's body and by a huge piece of concrete. There was no hope I could displace both the concrete and what must be my oniichan's dead body. I wouldn't have been able to move that sort of weight even had I been able to feel my body.

If I can't feel my body I must be going into shock…

I tried to cry out for help but my pitiful screams of before had been enough to finish off my sore throat. I wouldn't be able to speak for a while yet with all of my throat and nose filled with dust as they were. All I could see with my eyes wide open was the colour red.

Will I remain here, trapped!! What if help comes and I can't even hail to them…won't anyone help me please!! Help me! Help me!!

'So the little Princess wants some help! She only wants to get out of her little fix. And such moving feelings of affection for your poor dear puppet of a brother. And this after he protected you with his own body! Quite shocking if I say so!'

No I… I am not like that! I cared about Ran-niichan! But I can't help him anymore and I don't want to remain here with his body I can't! Oh Kami-sama please I can't!! Somebody… anybody… please!!!

A rich chuckle seemed to resound within my own skull as if something like that could even be possible.

Maybe I'm going crazy…

'Soon soon… you will lose it more and more each day as the guilt for your lost ones slowly creeps onto you. You will get your just punishment.'

Did I really deserve all this? Why? Am I such terrible a person? I… I…

'You are human that's enough little Princess… You are guilty! We all are…'

With that parting shot the voice seemed to fade out of existence. Its unwelcome tones now almost missed as I realised that I was indeed all alone in the world, my family gone. I could practically feel all of my hopes and convictions slowly dying, leaving a barren wasteland of emotions behind.

I could never tell afterwards how long it was before I started hearing the approaching sirens of the police cars and the ambulances. Intellectually I knew that it might take hours of the rescuers working amidst the carnage there had to be around me before someone could find me, still the little glimmer of hope stubbornly refused to die. It should have.

By my calculations it was no less than five hours before I was finally taken from the rubble and in the meantime night had fallen. When Ran's body was taken away I saw the starry night sky's serenity mocking me and promising normality and happiness that I could no longer hope for.

Life will never be the same again.

I didn't speak, I was beyond words, as the kindly looking old man who started tending to me asked all his questions. I didn't want to think about anything especially not about Ran and…

His body… I can't let them take it away nameless. I owe my oniichan that much at least.

"Please…" My voice was low and rough with disuse, but I forced myself to go on "My brother… can you see to his body… onegai…"

The man looked at me trying to make sense of my mutterings, then, a light of comprehension lighting his gaze, he answered, "Oh, no dear, no worries the kid who was protecting you should be all right even if he does have a pretty bad head wound. Bet he got knocked out cleanly. Now let us see about you, right doll?"

Alive… No he's lying to me… Why? Or maybe he' s telling the truth… But how could it be, I couldn't feel his breath nor his heartbeat…

"Now kid can you tell me your name and your brother's?" the man asked.

I could barely whisper back, "Fujimiya Aya and Ran…"

He looked at me in faint horror: "You mean your parents went through with their suicide with the two of you out here? Certain people… killing these many others and not caring even about their own flesh and blood!"

"I… I… They weren't that bad…" I could feel the tears coursing down my cheeks. I hadn't even realised that I had started crying.

Haven't I been tortured enough?

I, I… is it always I with you?

For a minute I thought the voice had come back but there was no sneer, this time it sounded more like my mother would, in the rare occasions when I got in trouble and didn't get bailed out by Ran.

No the voice… I, the new Aya behind born in the middle of the wreck of her previous life, was right. How often did I stop to think about others?

Did I ever care about someone else?

Do I even care now?

My thoughts were interrupted by the man still kneeling close to me. "Hey kid sorry about that. We'll let that rest. Now don't go falling asleep on me! Can you just try to grasp my hand?"

How can I grasp his hand when it's not even close to me? Wait he is touching my hand… but I can't feel it… Shock yes that's it…Shock… Oh Kami-sama what is wrong with me!!!

De profundis clamavi ad te Domine (Out of the depths I have cried to thee, O Lord…)

TBC…

AFTERWORD

Oh look is that a cliffhanger? Wonder who left it there…

I have decided to appease my comic urges here to avoid their running amok in the angst I'm trying to dish out in the actual fic. You can ignore this part just some rampart idiocy going on, on my part…

Ran: You seriously hurt my imouto! How could you!!!

Lilla: Well she wasn't that much better off in the TV episodes.

Aya : And you hurt my oniichan too! Now who will take care of poor me! Come to think about it why am I this sort of spoiled brat!

Lilla: Well you should resemble Sakura and all so I thought…

Aya + Ran: You know what is coming right?

Schuldig: She doesn't need to be a mind reader to know that. You Fujimiyas are pretty predictable. On the other hand… Lilla girl thanks, I had a pall messing around with the glares of doom other there! Can we do it again?

Aya + Ran: She had say better no!

Lilla: No…

Schu: ;.;

Lilla: You won't be that kind next time…

Schu: ^.^V Oh I like how you think…

Aya + Ran: Lilla, Mastermind SHI-NE!!!

Lilla: How original… o.o;;;

Schuldig: Indeed…