Yami No Matsuei Fan Fiction ❯ My Sanctuary ❯ From My Mouth ( Chapter 7 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Disclaimer: I don't own Yami No Matsuei or any of its characters, but I would love to that way there would only be yaoi couples,lol. The only characters I own are Sanaka and Ketsu!
Warnings: This is a Yaoi/ Shounen ai fic. And I won't have. As much as it is concerned, most of the fic is PG-13 with occasional R. For angst, mature themes/ sexual content, language, and rape .
Note: I need a beta! So if you like the fic after just the first chapter and is online very often, then please assist!


"Do you know him, Hisoka?" He smirked and placed a cold hand on my shoulder.
I shoved him away, "actually, I've seen him around the school campus and all." It wasn't a complete lie, the first time I saw him was at school. "Why, what's it to you!" I snapped back.
He smiled and stared off into space, looking seductive. "Actually...I was hoping to see him again. His last visit was way to brief. Next time you see him, make sure he stops by, understood?" I nodded obeying him, though I knew I would never turn Tsuzuki in like that. I could picture it now, Muraki violently raping the usually kind man. I shivered, terrorized by it.
"Hisoka!" I looked up. The teacher was glaring at me. "You are not with us today," he said.
"Sorry." I said.
He seemed satisfied, and continued. "As I was saying, the author was trying to demonstrate the misinterpreted feelings of humans. One can not force another in to loving them, even if they already think that person loves them back." As he talked, I envisioned my slender fingers holding a delicate and frighten Tsuzuki. Was that what I did when I kissed him without his consent. I turned my head towards the window, and jumped to my feet.
"Tsuzuki!" I saw that extremely attractive brunet leaning against a tree at the school gate entrance, most likely waiting for me to get out of school. A ripple of gasps from classmates filled the room. The teacher, obviously discomfited, cleared his throat.
"Hisoka, take your seat!" He stated, glaring at me again.
"Huh, oh...I have to go to the infirmary!" I yelled running from the room.
His face flamed, than addressing the whole class, he barked. "Alright everyone calm down." In the tense silence that hung in the air for a moment before he began lecturing again, my two friends giggled, thinking I needed Muraki for some perverted urge immediately. But it was a vision, a feeling that Muraki would obviously spot the violet eyed man as well. I ran by the infirmary, my hypothesis was right. The room was empty and Muraki was undoubtedly heading downstairs to meet him.
"I won't let you have him, you lecherous rapist!" I yelled to myself, rushing to the opposite flight of stairs. As I made it downstairs I noticed Muraki heading toward the door. I smiled, I could still beat him. I jumped out the closes window and charged for the man.
He heard my struggling breaths and turned around. "Hisoka?"
"Come on! Muraki's head this way!" I pulled the unexpected man out of the school yard and down the sidewalk.
Ten Minutes Of Running Later
String instruments played in the background, and a waiter hovered at our elbows. Tsuzuki and I smiled at each other across the white linen covered table. The luxurious restaurant was most unusual, but Tsuzuki seemed to have ways for knowing just the right place.
"How did we end up here as of from hiding from Muraki?" I asked softly.
"Because this place serves the best deserts!" He leaned back in his chair and smiled. "But the good memories are here as well, Hisoka." He laughed , sat up, and picked up his fork. And strugglingly tried to choose from the table full of every desert on the menu, to eat first. "Last time you wouldn't let me buy anything I wanted, but this is different."
"Last time?" I asked, shin in hand, adoring him.
"Yep." He said uninterestingly. He shook his head. "There are pieces of you and old you I like. If only you shared the same mind." He finally decided on which sweet to eat first and dug in.
"Well thanks a lot." I said sarcastically.
He put down his fork and smiled at me. "We can go somewhere you want next." I lowered my eyes and began eating the pie Tsuzuki had suggested I try.
"Sure."
Later that day we sat in a theater, waiting for the movie to begin. I thought a quiet, dark place would be perfect for hiding. It was warm and stuffy, and I attentively fanned Tsuzuki with a paper I had at hand. I looked up to the balcony where I know my two friends, Sanaka and Ketsu, would be perched. I had called them after eating, telling them I had already won part of the bet, going out with Tsuzuki. In disbelief, they followed us to the movies. They were there peering down at me. I raised my fan in a gesture of triumph. Ketsu beamed and cheered; Sanaka tossed his head. The beginning music of the movie rolled over us like an ocean wave, and I was swept along with it in the loveliness of being with the man I had now vowed to bed...whether he realized it or not. I sank down in my chair and laid my head on his shoulder. His eyes stayed glued to the screen, mine stayed glued on him. When I put my arm around his waist he turned and said softly, "maybe we should be heading back."
"But why? You promised we could do what I wanted to do!" I said in a high whisper.
"Well isn't a movie going to be long, plus you already skipped school?" He contradicted me.
I squinted my eyes, "you said anything. But we could always do something else?" A smiled quickly formed on my face.
He sighed, "no this is fine."
"Good." I leaned back over, wrapping my arms around his right one. I could see him blushing as the movie lights flare across the room. It only made him more attractive, I giggled.
And in a sudden realization, I blushed. It never occurred to me as what I was doing was weird and unusual. To those who knew me, I seem so strange because I am so forward. Somehow I feel like I am still the real me, the one Tsuzuki refers to. Only difference...I'm the me the real Hisoka wants to be. Friendly, social, completely true and loyal to my feelings. Would Hisoka be happy that I am him. He now has an excuse for loving Tsuzuki the way he does. because he is not himself, because he is me; he can now do things he had wanted to do as himself. And I now have an excuse for acting the way I do, because of Hisoka's original feelings. Whenever Tsuzuki is around, that part of Hisoka returns. His feelings, his love...I may feel what he feels but I will never understand these feelings I let resurface.
"I love you. Hisoka loves you." I explained. Tsuzuki stared at me startled. I smiled bashfully after saying that completely out of the blue. "You probably wonder why I am so affectionate toward you. Hisoka wanted to tell you himself, but he is afraid. Afraid you may not feel the same." I watched as Tsuzuki's face reddened and he frantically returned his stare to the movie. Though I am unaware of everything in the past, I can still hypothesize. I...no; Hisoka have always been afraid to prove my love. But there is still time. Maybe one day I will be normal...and when that happens Hisoka can be truthful. "When I am myself, I will tell you the right way. My feelings and the words that I can use to best describe them." I whispered to myself. Tsuzuki looked down at me again, I noticed he heard me, even though from then on he pretended he hadn't.